The best alarm I heard was a van which in a ladies voice announced "This vehicle is being interfered with!"🤣

@nicksinclair1533

25 күн бұрын

The alarm on a cash van went off outside my office. "Call the police, this vehicle is under attack". I then saw a rather startled parking warden with a ticket in his hand wondering what had happened.

Victoria and Sue are easily two of the best QI guests ever. I love them both so much.

The vicar is terrifically witty! What fun!

@TR-rz1xt

Ай бұрын

The delightful Richard Coles... used to be keyboard player with the Communards back in the 80's :)

@FloraWest

Ай бұрын

Richard Cole is great and turns up on panel shows a lot--very funny man.

@SpeccyMan

Ай бұрын

He's also written a couple of books in the Agatha Christie vein.

@pennydunwell7005

Ай бұрын

That vicar is a music legend from a group called the Housemartins

@pennydunwell7005

Ай бұрын

And the Housemartins, the Beautiful south😂

Doesn't really work in Europe, but in the US and here in Australia, driving a manual is a decent theft deterrent

@j_taylor

Ай бұрын

I wonder if that's true. How many car thieves, after putting a brick through the car window and a screwdriver through the steering column, would look down, exclaim "Aw nuts, I can't bear to wreck this bloke's clutch" and walk away?

@Ward1706

Ай бұрын

Particularly useful against teenage dirtbags doing it for clout. “3 pedals?! I’ve only got 2 feet! This ain’t gonna work.”

@sophitsa79

Ай бұрын

Most Australians, especially young people, don't know how to drive manual cars. Cars. I would love to drive a manual but I recently bought a car and it was almost impossible finding a manual. (Australia) ​@@j_taylor

@hannahxx17

Ай бұрын

Facts. Our street was targeted for 18 months and only one manual car was stolen before being dumped about 40 meters later because they couldnt drive it.

@j_taylor

Ай бұрын

@@hannahxx17 Wow! Well, then I guess it isn't only my friends who won't borrow my car. Lol

The best option is to have an easily identifiable car that everyone will look at in a 'wtf is that' way and not a 'wow cool car' way. My mothers work car is covered in fake turf top to bottom. For 18 months nearly every car in our street was either stolen or broken into. The turf car was safe. Either they were to embarrassed to be seen in it or they knew it was easy to spot.

@SpeccyMan

Ай бұрын

I'd be too embarrassed to use to instead of too. 😁

@hannahxx17

Ай бұрын

@@SpeccyMan autocorrect typo keyboard warrior

@chaos386

Ай бұрын

Covered in turf? Maybe they were afraid of it being a plant.

@hannahxx17

Ай бұрын

@@chaos386 like a car ghillie suit

@Google_Does_Evil_Now

28 күн бұрын

They didn't nick it because they knew they'd be grassed.

An American comedian said he would have a car alarm that shouted "'FREE WEED! FREE BEER!! FREE WEED! FREE BEER!" The people responding might not be the most helpful people but at least would attract an awful lot of attention'

@DoveJS

Ай бұрын

on the contrary, I'd say they'd be the most helpful because they might actually turn up and scare the guy off or at least annoy him. Or he might give them a free ride cuz they might badly need some help themselves.

Monk Whore is a metal band I’d listen to…

I like the Mr. Bean method. Not having a car is the easiest, best method of not getting it solen.

@Noah-wx7fm

Ай бұрын

That’s not the Mr. Bean method. The Mr. Bean method is taking your steering wheel with you whenever you park it It didn’t stop that tank from running over it though…

You know Victoria that night went out, watched a video, said I bet I can do that, and took David's car for a joyride

@ruthwashbrook4759

Ай бұрын

David doesn't have a car and gets driven places by Victoria.

@gregorydillon9167

Ай бұрын

@@ruthwashbrook4759 of course, because Victoria stole his car

@charliehorse1967

Ай бұрын

Does David own any tools? All the tools in that house are Victoria's. David hasn't picked up anything in weeks.

@JustAnotherPerson4U

Ай бұрын

If David did have a car and Victoria did that. She'd come home later to find David home watching the Telly. David: Oh are you back? When's dinner? Victoria: How did you get back home? David: I took the tube. Victoria: Did you seriously not notice that your car had been stolen? David: I assumed it was you. Victoria: You assumed it was me? Why did you not text me to ask? David: I thought you were busy. It was just easier to walk and take the tube.

@DoveJS

Ай бұрын

@JustAnotherPerson4U Bwahahahahahaha omg I love this entire exchange it's perfect 🤣😂😹😻

The joke amongst musicians is: "Leave a banjo in the backseat"

@SpeccyMan

Ай бұрын

I always thought the joke amongst musicians was the drummer. 😉

@colinmorris8934

29 күн бұрын

I did that but the window was broken and I now have two banjo's

Hidden kill switch is the best way to not have a car stolen

@stevie-ray2020

Ай бұрын

I bought a SWB Pajero 4x4 that a previous owner had fitted a kill-switch to, but it would drop down from under the dash when I did a right-hand turn and unknowingly my knee would flick the switch!

@Lance-Stroll

26 күн бұрын

@@stevie-ray2020 yup. Best to put somewhere u can't switch it while driving

A flat mate in college left his old car at a park overnight once. It got broken into and the thieves left him a CD player. (Poetically, the CD player did not work. We tested it.)

Having a terrible car is a _bad_ way to protect it. Old cars are _more_ likely to be stolen than newer cars. Sure, they are less valuable, but they are also less likely to have Lojack or other systems that track the car, and they tend to be much easier to break into and even to hotwire. The only newish cars with a similar problem are Hyundais and Kias as I understand it, and even those now have engine immobilizers and stuff.

Actually, all the car thieves I knew back in the day were more honest than the car salesmen.

Ahhh Sue Perkins is so young here!!!! I barely recognised her at first!

It helps to remove the car key when leaving the vehicle. 9 out of 10 cars stolen in Australia had keys left in the ignition or remote left close by.

Victoria Coren Mitchell....The ONLY reason I watch this.

take the ignition fuse with you.

I suppose my somewhat snarky answer would be to not own one. Being a car free train nut myself means I don't have to worry about these sorts of things that come with car ownership, I just turn up at the train station and ride to where I want to go that day.

@CycolacFan

Ай бұрын

Outside of the UK most people get to ride to where they want to go that hour…

@christopherdean1326

Ай бұрын

When I lived in London, that was usually quite easily achievable, as I lived a few hundred yards from an Underground station. Now, I have moved to rural Wales, and my nearest station is nearly three miles away, and it is on a branch line. Cars are pretty much essential round here if you are to have any kind of busy life. Fortunately, car theft is virtually unheard of round here. On a non-zero number of occasions, I have left my car unlocked overnight, once with the window wide open, parked a hundred yards from my house.

@shodan2958

Ай бұрын

@@christopherdean1326 Yeah, there are still areas that need cars, but many people in urban centres I reckon could get away with it, particularly if there is a move towards less car centric places.

@christopherdean1326

Ай бұрын

@@shodan2958 Absolutely! In many big cities, owning a car is more trouble than it is worth.

@SpeccyMan

Ай бұрын

Hardly snarky. I've never owned a car, nor would I ever want one. Too many nutters on our roads.

What I would do if I had a nice car is get one of those car chassis kits for an older model. Switch the chassis and then mess it up. Good car inside, crap car outside. Best of both!

how old is this episode? they all look so much younger 😍

@catherinekilgour2563

Ай бұрын

Stephen Fry was host up until 2016, so some time between 2003 and 2016.

@maramkura

Ай бұрын

@catherinekilgour2563 wow, so 10-20 years ago 😍

@SpeccyMan

Ай бұрын

This was from the K series so 2013-14.

Hang on, how could a car still be there to be 'annoyingly loud'...... _if it's been stolen_ .

@Altinget

Ай бұрын

Meeeb meeb....wrrooooom. 👀

@Tao_Tology

Ай бұрын

@@Altinget 🚔

The best anti car theft device is a manual transmission. Thieves are all idiots and don't know how to work them.

@samuellawrencesbookclub8250

Ай бұрын

Not so much in the UK, here most cars are manuals

In the nineties I use to park next to a ford. They were so easy to nick.

@zittyrrrs7082

Ай бұрын

That was my ford.... Once someone nicked it purely so they could siphon the petrol out of it..

easiest way in Australia is not to leave leave your car parked warming up in the driveway with the keys in

Answer: be in an area that doesnt arrest the victim and lets thr perp go.

Tackle social inequality so people don’t feel the need to steal a car in the first place. Also yes, don’t have a flashy car because tbh it does make one look like an absolute muppet lol.

Steal a car of your own. Then it can't really be stolen from you since it's not yours to begin with!

@SpeccyMan

Ай бұрын

With is a preposition, so it doesn't belong at the end of a sentence!

If it's the yellow car in the backdrop you just remove the rotor arm.

Buy a Saab, car thieves hated its gearbox lock ignition system.

Disconnect the battery and take it indoors with you. No-one's going to nick your car if it won't start.

@russthebiker

Ай бұрын

3 hour job on my focus That's why it has telematics

Back in the days, I used to take out the rotary arm ,now day's I have a 2013 ssangyong rodius. No respectable lad wants to be seen in that car.

From

I've never had my shoes stolen. Just sayin'.

@klaxoncow

Ай бұрын

That sounds like a challenge to me.

@tygrkhat4087

Ай бұрын

I had one shoe stolen once. When I was in college, someone on my dorm floor stole one of my sneakers. I never made a fuss about it, and didn't throw away the other shoe. Then, one morning near the end of the semester, I opened my door and the other sneaker was there. I never found out who stole it.

@NewMessage

Ай бұрын

@@tygrkhat4087 Clearly, it took a semester off school to tour Europe.

@panda4247

27 күн бұрын

Hello, Luna

Buy a Ford.....

Get a manual car.😁

If you dont by a car nobody can stole it.

It's ironic having a priest on the show

@guillermoelnino

29 күн бұрын

What, is this an opening to some all christians are pe doph iles joke?

Buy a manual car.

Just buy an EV 🤣