I understand. Most people know the phrase "people-please" carries with it a negative connotation, but most people also think it is about the other person - giving too much. So the cure is to love myself more and give less. The problem is the term really has to do with ourselves rather than the other person. We please people (in this sense) not because we love the other person, but because we love ourselves more. We need something from them: Acceptance, non-violence, or a good reputation.

Great explanation!

Thanks Ed. I see it now. We people-please to protect ourselves, i.e. love ourselves too much, rather than loving the other person.