Okay, that's pretty cool, but which ancient armoured fish invented digestive biscuits?

@queenoforeos3057

Ай бұрын

Not since the accident.

@servantbee.

Ай бұрын

Perchance

@definitelyhuman3512

Ай бұрын

Me

@MysticLGD

Ай бұрын

No. Me

@beacon6424

Ай бұрын

In this economy?!

I imagine fish on ancient times talking like "Bro what the heck are you doing you know that's not how to reproduce right?" "Oh fuck" "Oh what?"

@SorielHDTBers

Ай бұрын

Perchance.

@CyanRooper

Ай бұрын

You can't just say perchance.

@akam9919

Ай бұрын

@@CyanRooper perchance

@KnightsofGaming2016

Ай бұрын

"You looking mighty breedable bro" is what I imagine that one fish who initiated the first sex would say

@MilkLavenderTea-fn8jw

Ай бұрын

​@@CyanRooperyes i can

Glad to know I’ve failed my ancient ancestors on keeping up their Scottish tradition.

@metadragon6443

Ай бұрын

First of all I had no idea you were Scottish. Secondly this is probably the first time I’ve seen you outside the RW fandom

@mildlymarvelous

Ай бұрын

INSCHAAL WHY ARE YOU HERE

@Camphreneas

Ай бұрын

Huh…I never knew you are Scottish. Also- *_HOLY F*CK INSCHAAL_*

@cutiefox19

Ай бұрын

love how these replies are just recognizing you lol also this may or may not be the second time i found someone frequent in the RW community on this particular channel's comment section...

@mildlymarvelous

Ай бұрын

@@cutiefox19 I recognize you too lol!

For anyone wondering, yes, this is absolutely true and yes, that is the scientific name of the fish. It was named after the discoverer, Robert Dick, which just happened to be hilariously serendipitous.

@xenno8496

Ай бұрын

I love when EXISTENCE itself makes a joke

@ProfTricky3168

Ай бұрын

This explains a lot

@arenexa9013

Ай бұрын

we live in the best timeline. like imagine having the sex fish be named something like "oh the Microbrachius Smithenites were a species of armored fish that pioneered reproduction via penetration"

@SaintSoba

Ай бұрын

Well it's not true... Evolution is a joke and people that still believe in it don't look at things realistically

@elio7610

Ай бұрын

it is not entirely true because the "spawning" they mention is also a form of sex, sex existed before these fish. it is just a specific technique that these fish invented.

But have they made sex 2?

@SorielHDTBers

Ай бұрын

Perchance.

@Katonato

Ай бұрын

!@@SorielHDTBersYou can't just say perchance!

@benjarsenault

Ай бұрын

​@@SorielHDTBers you can't just say perchance

@MrHexTheGhost

Ай бұрын

@@SorielHDTBers You can't just say perchance!

@ThisIsAHandle-xz5yo

Ай бұрын

No, not since the accident

Damn they invented the number six?

@mossfinder7516

Ай бұрын

The german one

@sentinailes

Ай бұрын

No... They lied...

@digibowgaming

Ай бұрын

​@@mossfinder7516 And the Swedish one

@BunglebottomInc

Ай бұрын

Wait, Really?

@FalkyRocket2222

Ай бұрын

the classic

The sound of fish screwing in the background is something you will never forget hearing.

@DUKE_of_RAMBLE

Ай бұрын

I heard no cordless drills in the background, nor any vulgarities due to stripped out heads. So they most definitely were not screwing! Plus... *_fish don't have hands, DUH!_*

@user-bs5ol7du2y

Ай бұрын

​@@DUKE_of_RAMBLE what the sigma does your mean

@brightblackhole2442

Ай бұрын

⁠@@DUKE_of_RAMBLE well, obviously a screwdriver is a quieter option. although the fish do lack dextrous fingers, they may have held the handle of the screwdriver with their fins instead

@DUKE_of_RAMBLE

Ай бұрын

@@user-bs5ol7du2y Oh my epsilon... I'm just implying that they weren't using SCREWS. 😋 If you've ever tried to loosen or tighten a screw, either by hand or with a drill, and the bit slips out enough times to damage the screw head, it becomes "stripped out". A stripped bolt of screw is a major headache. Which, I can appreciate why it might go over the heads of some, as to really get and appreciate it, you need to have experienced this first hand - and not everyone is a handyman, which is perfectly fine! 😅

@DUKE_of_RAMBLE

Ай бұрын

@@brightblackhole2442 Having handled (ha) enough fish in my day, I must reject that speculation. They would be incapable of operating even a square handled screwdriver, specifically due to pectoral strength _(referring to their front pectoral fins)._ Plus, they wouldn't be able to spin around in place! No, if a screwdriver was used and fish were present, they *_most definitely_* hired an octopus to help out! _Maybe_ a squid... but no self respecting fish would go that route, at least in my opinion. _(there's a tentacle porn joke in there somewhere, but I can't think of one lol)_

I have never been more proud to be a Scotsman.

@crowgrabber_former_er5bb8yb2t

Ай бұрын

Perchance

@randomcat1015

Ай бұрын

@@crowgrabber_former_er5bb8yb2t Perhaps.

@GLOB13

Ай бұрын

Aye (I am only a quarter Scottish)

@meptune0335

22 күн бұрын

me too, lad

I would have never imagined starting my day hearing what fish clapping sounds like

@mr.cauliflower3536

Ай бұрын

That's probably not it, it's an artistic interpretation.

List of notable S̶c̶o̶t̶t̶i̶s̶h̶ British inventions: * Telephone * Penicillin * Television * Radar * Efficient steam engine * Pneumatic tire * Tarmac * Kaleidoscope * Bicycle * ATM * Flush toilet * Hypodermic syringe * Logarithm * Telescope * Color photograph * Sex Additional fun fact: Any good ideas coming out of Scottland suddenly become British. Otherwise they stay Scottish...

@identity_undetermined

Ай бұрын

if it's in the uk it always seems to be either English or British

@bg3841

Ай бұрын

Cue haggis

@invurret9533

Ай бұрын

The English didn't even invent the phone either, it was done in Canada (granted by a Scotsman). They can't let us have anything.

@chrisgaming9567

Ай бұрын

My gf also belongs on the list

@AstroLamaa

Ай бұрын

​@@chrisgaming9567... nice

I did not need the audio representation of the first fish sex

@baronbacku9984

Ай бұрын

i needed that

@ivanpiro999

Ай бұрын

Well you see, that's a matter of taste

I'm going to assume this is absolutely true without looking it up because it's funnier this way.

@jonathancasper04

Ай бұрын

I did the Google research, and it's absolutely true

"Our country invented electricity" "My nation invented gunpowder" *_"MINE INVENTED SEX!!!"_*

@nerdlord1408

Ай бұрын

If you do not read the final line in a Scottish ascent then something is wrong with you.

@sola_is_chilling

Ай бұрын

And X-rays, and penicillin, and fax machines, and the steam engine, *AND THE TELEPHONE, AND THE TELEVISION, AND IN A WAY, MODERN ARCHITECTURE.*

@meptune0335

22 күн бұрын

@@nerdlord1408i read everything in a scottish accent because i am scottish anyway

omg they really did invent sex O_O

Also, the word f*ck originates from Scotland! It only became a bad word because English people thought that Scottish words were vulgar and uncooth

@PenguinEconomics-st2ws

Ай бұрын

That's not true. Fuck has Germanic origins and was likely introduced to the British isles via the Dutch. The word vulgar just means common, and vulgar language is just words used by the commoners. In other this is not a nationalist distinction but a classist one.

@mhenderson7673

Ай бұрын

@@PenguinEconomics-st2ws Oh, I saw it in a documentary about Scottish language, some museum has letter written by a Scottish man that is thought to be the first usage of the word, although spelled slightly differently. Scots does have a lot of Germanic influence though. Edit - Also classism is what I was trying to imply, it became a bad word because English people were being classist against Scottish words.

@gadrill4285

Ай бұрын

@@mhenderson7673 Worth noting that Scots (not Scots Gaelic which is Celtic) is a Germanic language, not just a language with Germanic influence. Specifically both Scots and English derive from Old English (also called Anglo-Saxon) which are all part of the West Germanic language group which also includes the Frisian languages. Anyway the etymology of fuck is unknown. There are plenty of places it could have come from because many other Germanic languages have similar words, but since it was considered taboo hardly anyone ever wrote it down so there's not really any way of knowing barring time travel.

The fish then developed crawling on land just to smoke the cigarette after.

@jw8160

Ай бұрын

😂

Now that's a flex

@vito3510

Ай бұрын

Nah that's just sex

Probably an armored fish up in Canada that invented apologizing.

@unapologeticallylizzy

Ай бұрын

Have you been to the UK? 😂

@idle_speculation

Ай бұрын

An unarmored fish in the Canadian Arctic may have invented living on land.

Nobody: This fish: "Get laid lmao"

This is one of my top 10 favorite dinosauruses!

I'd've said chicken tikka masala but sex is a close second

The Scotman who invented the TV:

@joshuabessire9169

Ай бұрын

I'm against all this sex on television. I mean, I keep falling off!

@CyanRooper

Ай бұрын

🎶It seems today that all you see Is violence in movies And sex on TV🎶

@westtxtapper

Ай бұрын

​@@joshuabessire9169was that Billy Connolly?

@JoeVington

Ай бұрын

⁠@@westtxtapperNo, Monty Python, Graham Chapman I think

Aye mate this how everyone in bonny ol Scotland *hops away to put on kilt and eat haggis*

Galapagos: Exists Scotland: Hold my kilt laddy!

@luckless9487

Ай бұрын

Hold my whiskey was right there 😔

if this fish isnt in splatoon 4....

Not the sounds at the end ☠️

@KnightsofGaming2016

Ай бұрын

PLAP PLAP PLAP PLAP GET PREGNANT GET PREGNANT GET PREGNANT GET PREGNANT!!

Also the home of the first ever land animal, a kind of proto-millipede

The sound effects Jeaney's been using lately are...interesting.

Now that's rude, I'm sure he could do nothing about it. Don't worry buddy, you're Averagebrachius in my heart

If I had a nickel for every time I heard ancient fish sex in a jeaney collects video, I’d have 1 nickel, which isn’t a lot,but it’s weird that it’s happened at all

@jw8160

Ай бұрын

You could always rewatch the video so you get more nickels. 😋

A certain Heavy : *"Six... Now!"* But six is heavier than feather?

@SorielHDTBers

Ай бұрын

Perchance.

@KnightsofGaming2016

Ай бұрын

Pootis Engage? A certified classic

Jesus christ the more I hear about Scotland the more i start to think that Scottish people physically cannot be wrong or the universe will explode

@JohnDoe-zx1ck

Ай бұрын

Every time a Scotsman makes a ridiculous claim, reality warps itself to ensure the statement not only is true, but has always been true.

*splash splash splash* lay eggs lay eggs lay eggs lay eggs...

@KnightsofGaming2016

Ай бұрын

Why does this make me feel submissive and breedable 😳

But can it be deep fried and does it taste good with Irn Bru?

oh theyre going to glue you back together... IN HELL

@Boldcheesecake1029

Ай бұрын

I'll beat ya so hard you'll have a TWITCH!

What…. Is that noise…. In the background….

We’ve invented everything! 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿

@sola_is_chilling

Ай бұрын

Like, modern society would be unimaginably different if not for us.

I refuse to believe there were no bagpipes playing in the background while they were doing it

I currently am in that 2am-phase in which I click anything on my fyp

Wah

@sneekyguydude

Ай бұрын

Wah

@cheriankalayil2362

Ай бұрын

Wah

@GuyllianVanRixtel

Ай бұрын

Wah

@OMAN3307

Ай бұрын

Wah

@KnightsofGaming2016

Ай бұрын

Wah

I looked at the censor in the thumbnail and was like, “Oh, knowing the internet it’s probably the word sex,” and I was right

Perchance.

There's a creature from Scotland called the Wulver it's basically a werewolf but was never a human but has the body of a human and the head of a wolf

Same energy as "I invented the number 6" but this time it's true, somehow

All of humanity owes Scotland a debt it can never repay

I love when jeaney does a scottish accent

Microbrachius dicki was my nickname in highschool

Random fella of unknown origin overhearing the conversation: “you may have invented it, BUT WE PERFECTED IT”

I love posts where someone answers with nonsense and then backs up the nonsense

Don't forget another classic Scot invention, the Chainsaw (but it wasn’t made to cut wood).

@sola_is_chilling

Ай бұрын

My only advice is.. Don't search why it was invented up

Oh god not that "shlip shlip" sound in the background 😂

did it really need the loud wet slapping noises

Its boney's only 8cm long? Haha. Mine's double that. I guess that's why they call it Micro Dicki.

The small, long-necked dinosaur cockfish.

Instead of by spawning

"Yes, I invented sex" -- Sean Connery

Not the wet clapping noise- 😭😭

I literally looked up a scotland funeral for my dead cell phone, how did you know?

So glad that the fish people showed their appreciation for Scotland's contribution to the animal kingdom with polite clapping at the end

i did not need to hear the fucking splash sounds

"microbrachius".. scientists didn't need to burn them so hard..

I will brought up this fact when meets Scottish girls

So that's why my mom's grampa had so many mistresses. He was trying to keep his culture in the new country.

Sometimes i wish people would randomly spawn at different ages on the world, so like you could be walking in a school yard and like some random 80 year old man spawns out of nowhere

This sounds like something Ian from Whiskey Tango Foxtrot would drunkenly say while picking up ladies

Oh I see. Scotland is to blame for taxes.

While not true, this is certainly funny.

make sure to thank these guys before you get your freak on i guess

NOT THE WET FISH SOUNDS😂

I make it a point to discourage clickbait by commenting on any video with blurred words in the thumbnail. I advise others not to watch it, click "Do not recommend channel," and "I regret watching this." Let's work together to eliminate this practice from KZread. Spread the word!

Never been prouder to have scottish blood

Demoman is from there.

Well, thats a powerful insult of a name

hell yeah

the best invention from the UK by far

SCOTLAND MENTIONED!!!!!

> Instead of spawning I know it means asexually like mitosis or whatever amoebas do but i can't help but imagine creatures just pop into existence like in Minecraft

@caniscerulean

Ай бұрын

Actually, it was referring to how most fish still spawn, by laying eggs on the river/ sea bed, then the male just goes skeet skeet over the eggs. Sex refers to intercourse, where the eggs are fertilized internally.

If sex is so good, why hasn’t there been a sequel? 🤔

And that is why the Scottish have 8cm long bony fish, to this day!

Scoooooooootlad foooooreeeevaaaaaaaaaaaaa!

I'm not a YEC, I know that the Earth is millions of years old and that it all has to start somewhere but facts like these always give me an existential crisis. Imagine getting existential crisis over sex 💀.Just the fact that something as natural as sex began 385 million years ago is wild and mind-blowing to me. Thank you Microbrachius Dicki for the wonders of sex, hopefully I can experience it someday.

@idle_speculation

Ай бұрын

By sex the video means internal fertilization, as in the act of having sex, not sexual reproduction as a whole, which is way older.

@KnightsofGaming2016

Ай бұрын

@@idle_speculation "...which is way older". Not sure if that helps my existential crisis but thanks for the neat fact. Life is just wild when you start thinking about it.

Thank you fish.

So demoman tf2 is the ceo of sex

Checks out

Did anyone hear the bagpipes and clapping noises in the background

Someone update the Wha's Like Us tea towel asap

How many scientific names are just inside jokes or scientists trolling us? 😂

Oh nice.

I'd say the fish was average-sized, perhaps with a good personality too

"Not since the accident"

I'm pretty sure they invented drinking and swearing, too.

@xXrobloxpro123Xx

Ай бұрын

nope that was the irish

It's funny to me now that "expert" and "scientists" used to mean anything

'AGIIIS!!

the sounds 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 why.......

Bruh, if sex is _sooo_ good, why no one made a sequel, sex 2?

@KnightsofGaming2016

Ай бұрын

Why improve on something that is already perfect?

I always thought it was Greeks who invented sex. And then Romans discovered that you can also do it with women.

Even plants are getting game, not us.

SCOTLAND FOREVER!

I'm gonna go cry in the shower now

What makes me a good Demoman?