EXTREMELY disappointed with the lack of turtles.

@overhauledunderpaid6469

Ай бұрын

Worst movie of the year goes up there with little women the women weren't even little? My autism has no time for your symbolism.

@overhauledunderpaid6469

Ай бұрын

And of course the one with cursing stays goddammit...

@TheChristianna321

Ай бұрын

Didn't even get a good scene with the Tuatara

@StalePhish

Ай бұрын

They did say "Turtles All The Way Down" though! Whenever I'm watching a show with my wife and they say a phrase that was the title of the episode, or the title of the franchise, it's like a competition for whichever of us can shout "EPISODE TITLE!"

@TK-_-GZ

Ай бұрын

Hey, sometimes you gotta come out of your shell, and you will be doing just fine, but you gotta, gotta, want it all

Hank is just mad he can’t get the perfect stick

@vlogbrothers

Ай бұрын

I want a stick that good so bad!!

@Icehawk55082

Ай бұрын

Looks like a broomstick!

@AlarKemmotar

Ай бұрын

I have found sticks that good before. In fact I have found even better sticks. One is leaned against the wall by my front door right now. But then I've also been hiking and watching for good sticks for many years now, and have only found a few sticks that good, so it is pretty rare! One of the coolest sticks I ever found was a perfect stick that had all the bark cleanly chewed off by a beaver. That one's down in the basement!

@posthumorously

Ай бұрын

A lot of dogs agree with him!

@SheilaR.08

Ай бұрын

​@@posthumorouslyBut when they find them, they can't fit them through the door. It's always something. 😂

I was already laughing at “Dr. Pepper is no one’s favorite soda” but I LOST it when he mentioned John’s cameo

@timr6318

Ай бұрын

"Dr. Pepper is no one's favorite soda" is too insane even for a bit.

@NoNameAtAll2

Ай бұрын

El Psy Congroo

@ourmobilehomemakeover662

Ай бұрын

Obviously Hank does not live in Texas. Dr Pepper is THE thing to drink here.

@RainaRamsay

Ай бұрын

My favorite is how those two things aren't even vaguely related in any way whatsoever unless you know that Dr Pepper is someone's favorite soda XD

@rabinesque

Ай бұрын

ROASTED 🤣

John Green: *writes a book that later is turned into a movie* Hank Green: "Time to make fun of my brother. In public."

@michaelmicek

Ай бұрын

Was he even making fun of John? More like clowning around with in-jokes, puns, etc.

@patriciomejia1114

Ай бұрын

@@michaelmicek Well, there was the joke of John not being very good in his cameo as the gym teacher. Other than that (and even then), nothing that would be go beyond sibling banter.

@moirayzabelle5260

27 күн бұрын

Very younger sibling vibes tbh 😂

@milissamackey7231

27 күн бұрын

At least (or unfortunately) he didn't hump the town this time

@bernier42

11 күн бұрын

@@moirayzabelle5260 Literally came here to say “serious younger brother vibes”

I think gym teacher was a stellar performance compared to "dad at airport", much improved acting skills 😂

@rainbowslinkies

Ай бұрын

Although I will say, "dad at airport" does seem much more in character for John than "gym teacher"

@hayleywatson9136

Ай бұрын

I can't believe they hired that guy again. He must be related to the director or something /j

@ismarchew42

Ай бұрын

@@hayleywatson9136 Probably related to the author, everyone knows that the author's are responsible for casting decisions after all.

@StalePhish

Ай бұрын

@@rainbowslinkies Excuse me, that there is an elite quaddragocon competitor you're dissing

@ponyote

Ай бұрын

It's like the actor is branching out.

Personally, thought the volleyball coach was alright. Looked like a midwestern author.

@NinaDmytraczenko

Ай бұрын

He truly looked the part of a Midwestern dad. I actually think this might be a side gig for the actor, or he might be getting typecast all the time

@pattheplanter

Ай бұрын

He shaved before filming, so some points for effort.

@thamaras.b.93

29 күн бұрын

I would love if he had mustache on

It’s so considerate of Hank that he gives these critiques so that John can edit the movie and make it better

@justyourlocalrat_

Ай бұрын

AHH THIS IS SO FUNNY

@NinaDmytraczenko

Ай бұрын

I especially hope he takes note of the "volleyball coach", as John is such a H.U.G.E. part of casting his movies!!

@IrisGlowingBlue

Ай бұрын

++

@lutilda

29 күн бұрын

We NEED John's edit 😂

@myblueheather8240

29 күн бұрын

+😂+

Haha the smile after "totally unrealistic" is perfect brother energy.

@Raucey

Ай бұрын

Totally unrealistick

@IrisGlowingBlue

Ай бұрын

+

@ochoheido

26 күн бұрын

I mean, yeah, that's not even a stick. It's a DOWEL

This is the brother energy we expected 😂

@HeidiVids

Ай бұрын

Younger sibling energy

@NinaDmytraczenko

Ай бұрын

As a sibling, I agree. Would either do, or expect my siblings to do this.

@hopegold883

Ай бұрын

This is a perfect video. So creative and also informative. Not surprised. But still, gotta mention it. I’m off to try to get Max.

@krissp8712

Ай бұрын

Yep, absolute sibling roast. Hank nailed it.

@alien9279

Ай бұрын

Roasting his cameo was chefs kiss lmao

Total Sin Tally: 10 Sentence: Falling in love slowly, then all at once

@TheChristianna321

Ай бұрын

Also: hearts getting broken in the same way

@KBTibbs

27 күн бұрын

Like ketchup.

The "dont like it when dads die part" really made me realise the conplete scope into which i cannot and do not fully appreciate others frame of reference. I dont think it ever hit me that a father dying in media would hit a father (especially one who had faced their mortality) in a very very specific way. Like, i knew that, but i didnt capital K know it.

@xzonia1

28 күн бұрын

I'm just glad Hank's here to complain about the dads die part and tease his brother about his excessive awesomeness in the cutest brotherly way. :)

@marni-gable

28 күн бұрын

Yeah... about that.

let's sue John for not being considerate of where Hank imagined they would sit at the restaurant. that's like the most important part of the viewing experience of this movie.

@thrownfootfalls

29 күн бұрын

It gets worse. Speaking as someone from a country without Applebee's, I'd like to complain that the whole look of the restaurant was very inaccurate to the version in my head. Especially the logo, which had enough apple but not nearly enough bee.

Dr Pepper is my favorite soda and I can’t believe you just called me nobody

@RoweClementine

Ай бұрын

Same

@greeplurch

Ай бұрын

Let's go defeat some cyclopes!

@CheyanneStorm

Ай бұрын

SAME. WE ARE NOT NOBODIES. WE ARE SOMEBODIES. ;___;

@ZeKiwiOfTheNorth

Ай бұрын

+

@Tiewaz

Ай бұрын

Here, here. 😁

2:13 "If you were going to do it in Cincinnati, why didn't you just actually do it in Indie?" Three words: Tax incentives, probably

@myladycasagrande863

Ай бұрын

Yes, but those of us who are geographically obligated to diss Ohio (because it's Ohio) will still be annoyed about it.

@samreid6010

Ай бұрын

@@myladycasagrande863hey look, we may be Ohio but at least we aren’t Cleveland

@wildironprincess

Ай бұрын

That's exactly what I was thinking. Actually, Hank mentioned that HBO has Last Week Tonight with John Oliver, and I'm pretty sure he's done a story on Hollywood tax incentives

@michaelmicek

Ай бұрын

Cincinnati, the last walled city.

@laurakemp5979

Ай бұрын

Interior of the school (and excellent gym coach scene) is my highschool. Hasn't changed in 35 years (yes, I'm old)

NO! Bad HANK! I saw that crow-eating grin after saying "unreali-Stick"

@narenkyoPsych

Ай бұрын

"Unreali-Stick".....that's funny..... 😁

@michaelmicek

Ай бұрын

Which one is the better dad?

So what I’m hearing is that Hank is mad that someone else found the perfect stick before he did.

@NinaDmytraczenko

Ай бұрын

Nah, that stick was totally adjusted to be perfect

@levilukeskytrekker

Ай бұрын

+

@earthling_parth

28 күн бұрын

And he's not alone in feeling that 😤

Now I want a few key scenes with CGI turtles added in. Just photorealistic turtles casually in the background, sitting on a table, swimming in a sink. And then they get progressively more intrusive and numerous. Corridor Crew, make it happen. Make it absurd.

@resourceress7

Ай бұрын

+

@dancinislivin828

29 күн бұрын

TATWD: Special Edition

@SpaceSoups

29 күн бұрын

+

@sherrysung8334

29 күн бұрын

+ Yeeeeeeeees

This is the most siblings thing ive seen this week, john makes a movie and hank *immediately* goes "okay time to criticize this"

The random extra they got to play the volleyball coach doesn't look like he's ever actually played volleyball

That slow Grinch smile for 'unrealistic' was a beautiful moment.

@1IGG

29 күн бұрын

Unreali-stick. That's the pun.

ZERO TURTLES

A lot of things happened that feel like they were pulled from the John Green cinematic universe. Like Dr. Pepper, the "We're Here" song, OCD, and a middle-aged white guy that seems very invested in sports but looks like he'd be very bad at sports.

@dieWeltkarte

24 күн бұрын

Haven’t heard of this John guy but he should sue for plagiarism if what you say is true

The J-cut to #4 while Hank is still grinning about his stick joke is exactly the mix of dad energy and tight editing that keeps me coming back to this channel

At least the volleyball coach scene wasn't deleted from the final release!

Okay cinema sins, go off.

@VeroTesta

Ай бұрын

* *ding* *

Gifting over the $17k limit just means you have to file IRS paperwork. You don't owe tax until you've met the lifetime allowance of $13 million.

@michaelmicek

Ай бұрын

Huh, okay. So *that* particular one was a bit silly.

@undine120

Ай бұрын

Can confirm, it's form 709.

@whyamiwastingmytimeonthis

29 күн бұрын

13 effing MILLION?! Wow, I thought the limit was much lower

@jessicatiedeman1065

29 күн бұрын

I forget the details but they definitely get lawyers involved in the book too

@undine120

29 күн бұрын

@@whyamiwastingmytimeonthis It's designed to pass inheritance from parent to child, mostly, which is why it's that high, but can be used to give to anybody. In 2026 it'll revert down to 5 million if there's not a new law keeping it high.

This was beautiful "Which is different from how I imagined it and I don't know why you didn't know that" and "I had to go to a business meeting, and you should have been more considerate" are peak internet

@geeksdo1tbetter

28 күн бұрын

How dare you make me cry like that!

I was thinking about that, how I remember when TFIOS came out in theaters and I went with my mom (cancer survivor) to watch it together. Ten years later we watched TATWD together from the comfort of my apartment, and I have OCD. The entire time I’ve been here, watching vlogbrothers, laughing at silly memes and learning big ideas and feeling a pocket of the internet as a community with longevity. I’m really happy to be here. We are certainly here because. 🧡

@okayheykae

Ай бұрын

💜💜💜

@mariacatre

Ай бұрын

+

@Emilyanns8

29 күн бұрын

+ ❤

@ApequH

29 күн бұрын

+

@thamaras.b.93

29 күн бұрын

🧡🐢

But you gotta admit John did a great job casting it!

@KaitlinGaspar

Ай бұрын

😭😭😭 this got me

@kagaminek

Ай бұрын

that's because he has always been responsible for casting for all his movies and therefore he has a lot of experience

@okayheykae

Ай бұрын

@@kagaminek 💯

"Just because you haven't found a perfect stick yet, doesn't mean there's not one out there for you. Keep looking." - A. Dog

One day I hope my parents will be as proud of me as Hank was about that “unrealistick” pun

I randomly picked out turtles all the way down at the library for a book report and I'm in a french-speaking nowhere town so i can confirm this book is far and wide

I love when Hank said, "What city is that?" I yelled, "It's Cincinnati! It's Cincinnati!" Then he googled what city it was. Then I screamed, "Yes! (Which is kinda ridiculous because I live in that area. I should know what my city skyline looks like.) Also, very few people (No one I know.) in Cincinnati call that building the Queen City Square. We call it The Great American Insurance Building. (Saying insurance is optional.)

@Nickleplate765

29 күн бұрын

Where's the river?

@WritingDragon6785

29 күн бұрын

What do you mean by river? The Ohio River separates Northern Kentucky and Ohio/Cincinnati. Most of the time you cross the Ohio River to enter the city. However, if there is a River in the movie I can’t help you/explain because I have never read the book nor have I watched the movie yet.

@Finvaara

29 күн бұрын

I admit that I call it Queen City Square, but I'm 40 and I moved away 8 years ago

@culwin

29 күн бұрын

Do you listen to WKRP?

@Finvaara

29 күн бұрын

@@culwin I seem to recall WKRP being fictional, but there's always a chance that you and I aren't the only ones that remember that sitcom.

For a second, John must have been a little scared seeing this title.

@thewinterizzy

Ай бұрын

It’s John - I think you mean several seconds and a lot scared. (Love you, John.) 😂

@Kane0123

Ай бұрын

And he should have been. These were obvious issues. Classic Hollywood big wig errors… zero turtles…

John literally had a whole chapter in "Anthropocene Reviewed" about how great Dr. Pepper is lmao

Sobbed uncontrollably during the “We’re Here” song and it was so cathartic you guys

this is the most younger sibling energy video and i love it

Number 9: The title refers to the problem of infinite regress that could easily be resolved if you imagine the turtle as swimming through the cosmic ocean instead of standing in a void.

I know I'm the weird one here, but I genuinely didn't know John Green was an author. I really only knew him from Crash Course. This is like finding out your teacher is a TV star.

@michaelmicek

Ай бұрын

Welcome!

I don’t even know what part is That Part because I cried at six different parts. I really thought John was kindly hyping it up but no - that man spoke truth. the movie’s a gem.

this is the true sibling experience

1:11 “Dr. Pepper is no one’s favorite” The guy in charge of one of my clubs in college loved Dr. Pepper so much that became one of the major things he is known for (in addition to being bald and having a very distinct laugh lol)

@phoebegilliland8897

Ай бұрын

I'm friends with a youth pastor here in eastern Oregon. You just described him perfectly.

@nixthelapin9869

29 күн бұрын

@@phoebegilliland8897 dude 🤣 mine is in CO and not a youth pastor, BUT the club is a Christian club so he’s almost one lol. I wonder how many more bald Christian leader-of-some-kind-of-young-people Dr. Pepper lovers there are out there 🤔

Whole Green Brothers moment: Hank dissing John's cameo 😂 Love it

Hank you reminded me about a few months ago when I thought "I'll watch a couple episodes of Bluey while I eat lunch!" except that the last episode I watched was Onsies and I then had to go straight into a business meeting where I was leading the call and I was very much NOT OKAY to be leading a meeting.

@michaelmicek

Ай бұрын

Bluey exploits my inadequacies as a parent.

Personally, I was promised Hank as the tuatara, and unless I really misimagined your range of visual appearance, that did not happen. So really, Hank, where were you? Also not the biggest fan of dads dying, but I feel like it was presented really sensitively throughout the film and I’m grateful for the way that it was an event but then interwoven throughout without being dominant forever.

The balance of sibling shade and brotherly love is perfection! Thank you both for letting us be a part of your world. 🥰

Im here for Hank's proud moment after "not reali-STICK". 😂

If the money Davis gave Aza was gotten through illicit means since his dad was a shady character... The IRS probably isn't aware of it's existence. So as long as Daisy and Aza are super chill and don't make any large deposits to their banks (or randomly buy a car in cash...) then nobody needs to know ... (For legal purposes, i don't recommend that course of action for anyone other than fictional characters)

@kaspianepps7946

29 күн бұрын

You're actually supposed to declare illegal income to the IRS - that's why Capone ended up in jail for tax evasion.

@TheChristianna321

29 күн бұрын

@@kaspianepps7946 absolutely you are SUPPOSED to but I think these fictional characters could get away with it pretty easily if they watched the show The Ozarks

I genuinely appreciate the fact that in the book Davis has his father’s employee consult with Aza and Daisy to help them get the money put into the bank.

The actor they got to play John Green could have done a more convincing performance

Tbh my main criticism is that this movie isn't Will Grayson, Will Grayson. Look, I appreciate all these John Green adaptations, but really my heart just longs for one John Green adaptation for over a decade: Will Grayson, Willy Grayson. But apart from that I loved the Turtles All the Way Down movie, I cried, and I felt a lot of things and was stunned by the performances. Thank you to all who made this film

@aldrensiscar3988

28 күн бұрын

Ims still wondering how that book is still not adapted into a film yet. I thinks its John's best book by a mile.

@emmakane6848

21 күн бұрын

It’s possibly because John had a coauthor and can’t sign over the rights on his own.

As someone who works in a zoo in a forest and is always looking for sticks to use in animal habitats, I can confirm that we do indeed find sticks that good quite frequently. We just find ten bad ones for every great one.

Getting an ad for NOCD presented by John right after this video was just too prescient.

"unreali-stick" - 10/10, no notes

The unabashedly love Hank and John have for each other is a model for men and brothers across the world. It’s really heart warming.

“…which is different than how I imagined it AND I DON’T KNOW WHY YOU DIDN’T KNOW THAT!”

We now need the "John Cut" of Turtles All The Way Down with these changes (except for the Volleyball coach). All done by John and John alone. That building in Cincinnati? BAM now its a turtle. The too perfect stick? BAM add a crooked bit to the end. Tax evasion? BAM John ARD to explain its fine.

I agree, that stick was TOO Perfect

"Turtles All The Way Down is the best John Green movie yet"- Everything wrong with Turtles All The Way Down, Hank Green

@michaelmicek

Ай бұрын

Praising with faint damns.

don't worry, Hank. THAT part made us all cry.

the vollyball coach was ok, but i could not fully commit to the scene because i kept feeling i saw him somewhere and he had other jobs that are the furthest from vollyball coaching

@michaelmicek

Ай бұрын

Maybe if it had been soccer.

@truehope2344

29 күн бұрын

@@michaelmicek exactly!!

@elaineshiffer6929

29 күн бұрын

Like most volleyball coaches

Hank, I don’t think you realized how many people in Texas you’ve pissed off by saying Dr. Pepper is no one’s favorite soda.

@21sled

29 күн бұрын

It’s literally John’s favorite soda

@nashwinston1395

28 күн бұрын

@@21sled isn’t it diet Dr Pepper is his favorite these days?

I literally just finished the movie and jumped right over here to watch this. I was crying, now I'm laughing. It's been a good day.

I thought this was going to be clickbait, but there were a couple of good points (and also plenty of silly ones). I love how beautifully supportive he is to John!

Can't believe they got the casting director to cameo as the gym teacher?? The movie business, man. Great movie though.

@michaelmicek

Ай бұрын

You'd think the CSA would have a rule about that.

so crazy how minds work cause that Applebee's scene was not only the closest recreation of how I imagined TATWD scenes in my mind, I think it's the closest recreation of how I've imagined anything ever

“DrPepper is no one’s favourite soda” leading to a point about John is PEAK HUMOUR

I started crying when I saw “It’s not how you die it’s who you die”. As someone with really bad health anxiety, the whole movie was moving, but that… that hit different.

I appreciate Hank talking about the very important seating issue in this movie - I also pictured them at the interior booth. It's thematically correct and the movie must be remedied.

Hank Green confidently claims Odysseus's favorite soda is Dr. Pepper despite complaining about that a character shouldn't assume what someone else's favorite soda is. +20 sins.

@sams1982

29 күн бұрын

Excellent Homer reference, 10/10

@geeksdo1tbetter

28 күн бұрын

oh, snap! That took me a full minute!

I made me so excited to see Rosianna Halse Rojas with a producer credit. Why am I crying already the credits barely started

@geeksdo1tbetter

28 күн бұрын

woo! go, Rosianna!!!

My youngest child does the same thing from the first 2½ minutes whenever we watch the new live action Avatar: The Last Airbender and they compare it to the animated series throughout the show.

Bless you for writing "Aotearoa New Zealand"

The amount that I cried during the trailer DID NOT fully prepare me for how much I would cry during the movie and I feel that there should be legal consequences.

That little smirk you did after making the 'unreali-stick' pun😂😂😂

I accidentally watched this video on 1.25 speed and didn't notice anything wrong cuz it just showed a super passionate Hank who was so passionate he was talking EVEN faster than normal.

No turtles

@davidhill5879

Ай бұрын

Haha I knew it

@davidhill5879

Ай бұрын

Wait this isn't a live chat, this just makes me look like an idiot

@reanie_

Ай бұрын

@@davidhill5879 dw it doesn’t

Wow Hank you really did follow through on your tweet

How hard you had to work to not call it "an absolutely remarkable thing" was noticable.

Hank: thats totally unrealiSTICK Me: ... Hank: :) Me: *likes video*

1:15 I KNOW hank just said that to get a rise out of john, and STILL for half a second I actually took offense to what he just said

I got MAX for this (I dont regret it!) but am cancelling it immediately. Streaming channels with ads are missing the point.

1:14 Hank woke up today and chose violence 💀😂 he KNOWS John LOVES Dr.Pepper

Hank smacking down the SEO of CinemaSins and I am here for it

"Dr. Pepper is no one's favorite soda!" Ima throw hands, Hank.

I just finished watching it like 10 minutes ago and I started sobbing when Aza was talking to Prof Abbot, and then at the “we’re here because we’re here” I started sobbing and just kept crying through the rest of the movie. It was good. I easily could have watched another 20 minutes just for them to cram in more details from the book which I now have to re read. I loved it. I am still crying as I type this.

I stayed up way past my bedtime (as a 37-year-old mom) to finish the movie. Just like the book, I couldn’t put it down. It really is beautiful. Hank, I thought the same thing when Davis ordered Dr. Peppers for everyone.

#6 is GLARING

I love that these mostly amount to specific headcanons about the book. lol

To celebrate Hanko De-Mayo my husband and I finally watched Turtles All the Way Down. All joking aside, to have a movie where we can laugh, cry, feel, and grow is rare. We had a beautiful time. Thank you! DFTBA

“You shoulda been more considerate” *me @ the ending of every John Green book*

You don't realize how often the Dad dies in a movie as a major plot point until yours passes. 😂 😢 😂

@stacyroth1664

Ай бұрын

Not a movie, but Marshall's "I'm not ready for this" in HIMYM killed me.

"that scene is different than how I remembered it and I don't know why you didn't now that" "the part you know the part that part that particular part it just made me cry pretty intensely and then I had to go to a business meeting you should have been more considerate." lol ya I feel like that sometimes so true have not seen the movie (I don't have Max and broke ass college student me isn't gunna pay $20 for one movie sorry) but I just feel like those quote work so well internal sometimes thats just how I feel in general

@dancinislivin828

29 күн бұрын

I'm pretty sure you can do a week free trial just to watch the movie and then cancel, if you want!

@rebelcommander7starwarsjur922

28 күн бұрын

@@dancinislivin828 might do that

Unrealistick *smiles proudly* I love you hank

hank has every right to be that proud of this pun. it will stick in my mind for weeks.

THAT part made me cry a lottttt too! But I love crying and I love the movie so much!! 💕

Your humor is on point, always puts a smile on my face!

I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU WOULD SUBJECT MY OWN TWO EARS TO THAT PUN, HANK.

my wife and I watched turtles all the way down last night. i felt pretty much the same way watching the screen version as i did listening to the audiobook version. you know it's a solid portrayal when the highest negative critique you can come up with is, as it was for my wife, "did she drive a corolla? i thought it was a different car" and then immediately going to the (speaking of rare books) two-pages signed copy of turtles all the way down, going to chapter two, and looking at the detailed description of exactly that car in the movie which was in fact a corolla.

Is that John in a movie?!

@geeksdo1tbetter

28 күн бұрын

Our boy finally made to the screen!!