“7’s want money because it’s basically tickets to the next fun thing.” 😮🤯 It’s so true! It’s like a carnival. Those prizes are never as awesome as they seem.

@robinkranzlein6079

3 жыл бұрын

Some things are extraordinarily awesome though, if you can be present to them

The best advice here for 7’s is to focus on making anything fun, instead of looking for “fun” things. We are the joy bringers, we can make anywhere a party. We are meant to unburden the 1/2/5/6 types that stay stressed and focus on complex problems. We lift people up and bring them adventure 🙌🏻 We have a purpose

@gojoshgo33

3 жыл бұрын

Beautiful

@joesickler5888

2 жыл бұрын

So that’s why I like to bartender.

“Focus on making anything fun, instead of looking for “fun” things.” This is rich stuff. Thanks friend! From one seven to another. 👍💯🎁

@StorytellingHeadshots

3 жыл бұрын

Also the insight about dessert vs eating a full meal is profound. “Auntie Mame” the quintessential seven type has this phrase, “Live live live, life is a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death!” How ironic that the seven may actually be starving herself to death by eating a endless series of dessert plates instead of sitting down in the present and eating the banquet in front of her. I will be soaking in this truth for a while: thank you.

This was the best ennegram teaching I have heard. Im a 7 and Ived been having not very healthy seasons again. I took notes! Wow! Separating myself from my impulses. Big one for me. Just being present in the mundane daily things of my life. "DO Things Fun". A daily reminder. Thank you this was a timely word!

Loved your comment about when we go to a 5 and discover something we are enthusiastic to share it, not stingy with the information like the 5's. Our office has recently switched to a new software program, when I find a cool tip I get excited and share it. The 5 will say, 'oh I knew about that months ago,' and my first thought is, 'then why did you keep this to yourself?'

@twlahue

4 жыл бұрын

YES---Share, Share, Share

@yahyasaeed7410

4 жыл бұрын

You forgot the ! I really dont like such a stingy person with information.

Wow this was huge. I am a 7 wing 8. I have lived a lot of years morbidly obese & gluttony is a huge problem for me. I lost 100lbs 10 years ago. I just learned about enneagrams & this video was a huge insight into myself. I am always avoiding & evading. Shoving down feelings with immediate pleasure.

not me literally nodding my head in agreement with all of this

@summero-my5in

3 жыл бұрын

LMAO same

These are probably some of the most important videos I've ever found. I recently got into the enneagram and I'm a textbook 7w6, lockdown basically ruined my life cause I spent the last couple years just imagining all the things I could be doing instead of sitting at home, and after that I went hard into gluttony, not only over-eating but over-experiencing various things, trying to keep up with 73 different hobbies, losing sleep because there's just so much I want to do. The disintegration into type 1 was very obvious to me because I tried to regain control of my life by setting up very rigid plans and schedules for myself and then just beat myself up for not living up to my expectations and my perfect timetables. And I know I can be a healthy 7 and go into that type 5 integration cause I've been there before, where you can pick a few niche things and go deep into them, and feel immense joy for mastering a few domains, and inspire others while doing so, and find joy in thinking about how maybe you can combine these things together into unique experiences, which bring immense joy, but are only possible by dedicating yourself to these pursuits, instead of jumping around all the time. The jumping around stuff is really just a way to escape from pain, boredom and loneliness. The moment we become still, the thoughts of "I am not enough" start coming up, which I just can not deal with. I even see it in the hobbies I had for a long time. For example, in my unhealthy phases I need to listen to or play music that is as loud, fast and complex as possible, but when I'm healthy I can listen to an ambient piece and be content with it. Anyway, I'm really glad for these videos and I learned a lot, there's lots of introspection I will need to be doing after this.

I feel SEEN! I’m a 7w6 and I’ve been struggling so much since Covid lockdown and feeling like I don’t have much to look forward to. My mind is grateful because I’m so blessed but it hasn’t but my emotions yet. The lockdown has exponentially increased my FOMO and I’ve found myself being VERY sad at times. More recently I’m up and down emotionally. This talk has given me great insight!!! I will be reaching out for coaching!!!

@StorytellingHeadshots

3 жыл бұрын

I can so relate to your comment. During Covid, I have felt more lethargic and depressed than ever before. Came here to find help. This comment was so relatable. Thanks for sharing. 🎁

@briannahaggerty783

3 жыл бұрын

Me too. The icing on the cake was a trial separation from my husband that left me totally isolated and depressed. I’d already been struggling with hating our move to Cleveland from always living on the coasts- Virginia Beach or San Diego, or the sun and fun of Phoenix. Ohio is dreadful but I now know I’m not alone

27 years old 7w8 here. Thank you a lot, you blew my mind. My 8 wing makes me colder, more lucid about the bad things of life, but also makes my gluttony very strong. Your video helped me a lot.

@twlahue

4 жыл бұрын

Glad you found the video. Blessings.

@TheJavaFrog

4 жыл бұрын

Yup, discovered the Enneagram in seminary. Realizing I’m a 7w8 has brought a tremendous clarity to my life.

@freefunk5342

4 жыл бұрын

@@TheJavaFrog welcome to the enneagramm family! I hope you will feel the change of your being during the next months. The path will be tough at the beginning. To accept the fact that you're probably suffering a lot, and accept the weakness of this situation can be very harsh. I advice to just lay down in the bed and let go all the emotions you feel when you focus on this. It will be intense, but you will feel better afterwards. Wiser, calm, loving too.

This talk is so helpful to me. As as bored, dissatisfied 7, I've even wandered around the Enneagram trying to be other types! Thank you for the honesty of this video, and I love the quote, "Do things fun."

My 26-year old son, who is one of the biggest sunbeams in my life, is a Seven. I just love him -- he's so delightful and high energy and brilliant and funny! I feel like he has a lot of emotional pain that he's not facing, though, and it worries me. It's been naturally hard for him to relate to me, I think, because I'm a Five. He's starting to do a lot of in-depth studies on philosophy and religion lately, though, and it seems to be really helping him, and he wants me to join him -- which is so cool! :-) He's been miserable and increasingly angry during the pandemic/quarantine, but the more they let us out, the more he improves. :-)

@trucoproductions5585

4 жыл бұрын

As a fellow 26 year old 7 I recommend sharing Brene Browns Ted talk on vulnerability with him. Learning to open up about the bad as well as the good has helped me let go of the baggage I was internalizing and replace it with the appreciation of creating deeper relationships with the people I love. He’s definitely lucky to have a mom like you!

@robinkranzlein6079

3 жыл бұрын

That is so cool, congrats!

There's a process to experiencing rain. As you're experiencing the rain, it will help to realize this too will pass. There's a beginning,middle an end to it. So you can sit there beinng present to the rain, knowing you're somewhere on the pendulum, and that pendulum will definitely play itself out. And feel it, because it will add richness ad wisdom to your life, make you a fascinating person, a person who can embody the light and the dark. 7s are able to do this..

@gojoshgo33

3 жыл бұрын

Wow, I appreciate this post

That's why I was a chain-smoker ... That's why I over-ate and got over-weight ... That's why I over-spend money and buy buy buy. I quit smoking 5 years ago. I discovered intermittent fasting which is an amazing experience & life style for a 7 !! Lost the weight. Now finding balance with money... being a 7 I now understand the WHY.

I’ve always been aware that I’m self-indulgent. I don’t say NO to myself very often. 😳

25:11 "when you focus on happiness you get only misery." Know I well the Dao of this precept, sensei!

Tom thank you for the video. I am a 7w8 and have studied the Enneagram for 15 years. I am fortunate enough to use the Enneagram in my private practice and I know my clients have made great progress with using the Enneagram in my work with them. I appreciate your speaking clearly and easily about the different types and you clearly have a great, easy speaking style. Thanks so much for your videos and keep up the work with the Enneagram.

@twlahue

4 жыл бұрын

Thanks for your encouragement.

@fredboykin7817

4 жыл бұрын

@@twlahue I think you can relate, when I first found the Enneagram I was SO enthusiastic about it that I just HAD to teach all my clients the Enneagram so they could share my enthusiasm. Over the years, I have mellowed and only use it with my clients as I see they need it. Most clients benefit from the Enneagram without us discussing it directly, but in the clients that want to learn it, it brings depth and meaningfulness to their lives. Of course, being aware of your own type makes a meaningful difference when counseling as well.

I’m a 7w6. Discovered the Enneagram a month ago... needless to say its been the thing I’ve been excited about, spending my time studying, thinking about and bringing into every conversation. Watching this and hearing your description of how 7s get enthusiastic about new thoughts and ideas while I’m obsessing over the new thoughts and ideas found in the enneagram seemed very meta. Hahaha

@StorytellingHeadshots

3 жыл бұрын

You might also enjoy Richard Rohr’s talks on The Enneagram.

How you have described everything resonates with me with unsettling accuracy 😂 I almost stopped watching because of those uncomfortable feelings. Thanks for your video.

I like the dessert bowl analogy, I def have always felt empty and pushed the real tough shit to the side never wanting to eat the real dinner

The same with instruments.... me with my abandoned instruments In a corner

I felt this. I just found out about the enneagram. I actually started crying when you were explaining everything. I have developed very unhealthy copy skills, specifically during COVID-19. When being under the stay-at-home order, you couldn’t really go out anywhere and I was going crazy, even having weekly breakdowns...When I did go out and play soccer, when I was doing this, I already was thinking of the next thing to do that day. At the end of the day, I felt like the day was unsatisfactory. I am going to take your advice into my life. This was much needed!

I feel so seen right now! Omg. I've been feeling so alone and misunderstood by my family for a while now. I knew I was going through something since my grandmother died, but while I thought I was allowing myself to sit with the feelings of grief, I also remember continuously reminding myself 'she was old and sick, why am I surprised she's gone if this moment was inevitable' anytime I grieved or talked about my feelings. You helped me see how much I avoid any of my negative emotions. It's really giving me a whole new perspective right now because I was so convinced I was the kind of person who was totally fine sitting with my sadness.

7 here! Really loved this and feel so seen. I’ve found a new peace in lockdown as for the first time ever I don’t feel like I’m missing out on anything because I can’t go anywhere. We recently moved from the US to Germany and I found myself constantly booking long weekend trips to the alps, Budapest, Vienna, Paris and I am wearing my family out. It’s been nice to just enjoy being home and I am spending my time reading and with my kids. Embracing the 5 and riding the wave.

45 minutes of what's wrong and 7 minutes on what is helpful. Wow, I wish mental health healers would focus more on the healing and less on the problem. Sometimes focusing on problems seems to make things worse, at least in my humble opinion. But your videos are interesting, thank you for that and for the time and effort you have expended. Im sure you are helping many people

I’m a 7 and I’m literally doing dishes listening to this! 😂 I’m afraid of silence! Sit in nothing for 15 minutes?!? 😬

"lets just get in a van and drive across the country" ... that is always where my mind goes as a form of escapism

"Why can't I just enjoy what I'm doing right now?" Real talk! These impulses are so hard to ignore

I am laughing out loud watching this.. I feel SO validated!!! Thank you so much. I finally have some tools to help me

Your insights and delivery is perfect for me .... I like the humour and directness and I feel like a more grateful 7 today thank you

Such a 7! I never master anything! If it get tedious...I'm out! Boredom is my kryptonite! I'm so thankful I discovered your videos! I needed to hear this!

Speaking of "doing things fun" - I notice when I am on an uppers (like caffeine for instance), suddenly I FINALLY am able to really do things fun! It's like everything that I'm seeking, the happiness that I am always sure is just around the corner, is like HERE I AM. I have read somewhere that 7s are drawn to uppers and wonder if anyone else has had that experience. I never comment, but I am obsessed with your channel. Thank you!!!! You are so insanely engaging! A lot came up for me during this video.

@movetoknoxvillewithdawn

3 жыл бұрын

Totally feel you on the “uppers”. I discovered caffeine pills in high school & have been a moderate caffeine addict ever since as it makes me feel like the most “me”. When I’m not up on caffeine I am typically a couch potato.

@Bicklehoff794

Жыл бұрын

Not me (I think)besides one cup of coffee in the AM, uppers make me anxious and eventually depressed when I come down. I do like a great dopamine hit though from sugar, alcohol, whatever I can find. Anything to put me in happy mode and stave off boredom or anxiety.

Yes! Growing up I always thought if a little bit is good, than a lot is the best. Now that I am older I am trying to let go and simplify and slow down, learn that less is more!!

Sevens need to work in what I call "seasons"

@super92

4 жыл бұрын

could you elaborate?

@kevinmai4015

4 жыл бұрын

@@super92 What I'm sensing from that is following your inspirations/non-resistant moments where you feel inspired to take action and then allowing the phase where you feel down/not working to be just that ;) "going with the flow"

@deepwaters7242

4 жыл бұрын

Oooh I like that. My partner and I ideally have 2 different seasonal jobs with breaks in between.

I have never felt so understood. I have always identified as the Hare from the story of The Turtle and the Hare. I am a sprinter. I have great ideas but not good at maintenance. I am a Jack of-all-trades. I Always felt I had ADD, not being able to turn the thoughts down in order to listen well. At my worst, I have a love/hate relationship with everything. At my best, I'm laughing with my kids. And my slogan: Adventure is the life for me. Thanks for helping to reach the next levels in this life.

Loved this video! I learned the “you can make anything fun trick” early on which maybe has kept me healthy-ish. I attribute this to role models like Mary Poppins and getting research on gratitude as a very young adult. Now to try and get my gluttonous impulses under control a bit and getting my shoulds under control. Also I stared at my phone for a full minute when you said, “after eating the whole cake once, 7s can come back and see that I survived that first cake, it wasn’t that bad and do it again.” I have gotten in the habit of expanding my appetite over and over, literally.

Thanks for the awesome video, I felt so much clarity listening to you! For all you other 7s out there I recommend watching a video or reading about ‘Dopamine detoxing’, I find it’s a really effective way to help control impulses and find more satisfaction in life’s ‘boring’ things.

This just *completely* changed my life. THANK YOU BROTHER 💖🙏💖 God Bless ✨

ACCURATE! In every single way. Thank you so much for sharing. Would love to see more about how to change the negative traits as a 7.

Maaaan! That is gold. I traveled through a laughing-crying-at-the-same-time-transformation. One really misunderstood part of me felt so seen and meanwhile I faced the hard truths that my mechanisms will never lead me to the life that I'm longing for. Thank you so much for putting your knowledge out here! It was espacially beneficial for me to know that you are a seven. All the insights were so PRESENT! Thanks again!

"Gluttony": I'm eating a full tub of ice cream as I watch this 😄

You talking about eating three Oreos and enjoying it makes me want to shove my head through a wall haha.

7’s listening while scrolling through comments simultaneously

As I (a 7w6) listen more and more to this, I am forced to wonder how type 7 and ADHD relate.

INFJ 7w6 here still confused and curious about things because I enjoy adventures , fun and social events but then suddenly needs a recharge alone . Some of my friends see me as an extrovert because I wanna distract myself from my problems through the things that I want to do or through the things that seem fun to me just like drinking with my closefriends and etc. but in reality I'm introverted af. Any introvert type 7 here who can relate?

I am a 1 but this video has helped me A LOT. Thank you for what you do! It is life-changing!

Love this! Laughed so hard at the difficult parts! ... Yes, I recently discovered that letting go of what “I thought I needed,” = Freedom, Happiness, & Contentment. ... Gratitude is also the antidote that helps me too! ... So many good quotes in this. “Do things Fun.” ... I am doing the dishes right now, And everything else I’ve been avoiding, while I listen to your talk! Thank you! 🙏🏾😄

I'm a 7 and walking through the season of divorce. I am really curious how the healing path might be different for a 7 and our focus on external and resistance from the internal. I have been feeling emotions bigger than I knew were possible, because I didn't want this divorce. My 5 husband was often overwhelmed by my big personality. I want to love myself and accept healing and joy into my life. Thanks, Dr. Tom.

@twlahue

4 жыл бұрын

Allow yourself to feel the pain and the heartache. Don't rush to the finish line.

You’re correct that thanksgiving is my holiday as a 7, but it’s also what I need least. I am encouraged to be a glutton. Or I can see it as an opportunity to not and be thankful for the amount of food on my plate.

Thank you for this video Dr LaHue. I'm also a 7. Bright, energetic, jolly, adventurous and.. reliant on daily prescribed anti-depressants. :)

I am 7W8 and thank you. This is life changing. I should do everything right now in fun way. Instead of looking for fun thing to do. Thank youuuu. ❤❤❤

I'm really thankful for your videos.

The subconscious archetype i really resonate with is Ariel from the little mermaid so this is def true

When I was young, I remember being in the car listening to a song I love on the radio, 1/4 way through, I'd think oh but there might be a song i like more, and I'd constantly be on the dial changing , looking for more.. Now, I say no!! I must stick at this hobbie,it will get boring but just shake it up .. think it comes down to lack of trust in ones self, the fear we didn't pass..fear of rejection. It's better to get a C though I didnt get a D . Scenario.. to get a B u have to stay at one consistent level.

The make things fun was a great take away for me. Also its so true, i know a bit of a few languages. Currently learning dutch and i might throw myself into it fully.

thank you so much for this informative video, you have said like 90% of my life in this video, I also appreciate your approaches for helping the 7's problems

Love your vids fam. As a 7w6, I have a lot of things resonate on me. I had a very sad (not super depressive) state where I kept failing my thesis and did it twice. I was down in the dumps the melancholic depressive side emerged. Thankfully, my parents are not beating me around mentally for failing but just keep trying to push me to do better next time. They did become disappointed a bit but they will always say it does not matter much and just keep fighting. Rehashed everything, went to square one with new members and we kept the positivity up and took the good in 1 and finished the thesis. Now, I am in a bit of hedonistic lifestyle and planning to take a big leap for my career onwards. Your videos help me to think of not hesitating and go ahead since I may feel the rain but it's totally normal to feel so. Also, I love how you stated that we can do things for fun and you said, putting music or podcast in your phone and listen while you wash dishes, since I really do that everyday. Sometimes I bring in a little dance and sing while doing it to make things enjoyable.

Tom, thank you so much for this video. I am a 7 wing 6 and this video is exactly what I needed to hear. Keep it up! Looking forward to enjoying more of your content.

@twlahue

4 жыл бұрын

The struggle is real...7w6 :-)

@BarryBizarre

4 жыл бұрын

Dr. Tom LaHue the struggle is very real. I’m constantly thinking of new big ideas, want to literally do everything. I’ve changed my career many times, and I’m always on the go. I seem to overfill my schedule where I can’t do it all.

so someone sent this to me and it was the best thing she could have did..WOW!! Thank you🙏🏽✍️

im a 7 wing six too! Thanks for all the information.. kinda scarry that is so accurate, so im sitting here to see and enjoy the rain! jajaja i´ll see this again, i didnt write down, but, there was a lot of key ideas that were really interesting to work on making myself a more healthy 7. Also im glad that im going that direction, thanks to others teachings. But this is really helpfull. Feels like a game changer information to improve the way im working on myself, and in what i am focusing in. Thanks Again!!

@DonovanMekgwe

4 жыл бұрын

Pooh after seeing you profile pic I feel like hiking 😭😭😭

I just hear you said " what a wonderful world " " van " " live in the van definitely I am a 7.. Its my dream . I always was afraid to lose myself to lose being a 7 I think !

Thank you so much for this! As a seven, some of the truth in this video was almost painful to hear. I literally cringed at some of it thinking "Yikes! I really have left a trail of broken promises with some people...ouch" but we need to hear it and face it and fix it so we can be healthy sevens and bring that joy to all! This spoke to me in so many ways. I am currently in therapy and will bring some of this into my weekly sessions and my emotional 'homework'. Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart ❤

"They're really up when they're up, and they can kinda get really down when they're down" Not even two minutes in and, damn, I felt this

‘What will I have wanted to do’ really got me.. made me tear up! This will be my new motto! I am new to the enneagram, am doing my research now and I think I am 7w6.

@twlahue

4 жыл бұрын

Great, also, focus on "Doing things fun" rather than "Doing fun things.

For as long as I can remember, I've always tried to make everything fun. When I'm doing the dishes, I listen to an exciting podcast. At work, I play a round of my favorite game on my phone after each client. And when I have to do tedious tasks that require more time, I break them into 10-minute chunks and do a little bit each day. That way, it doesn't feel like work. Gamification is a huge thing for me.

@twlahue

2 ай бұрын

Sounds great!

I’m so glad I’ve found your videos. I’m a 7 and now the things I do make so much sense. Thank you your videos are really helpful

This week was very difficult for me because I want to jump from one thing to another. I can’t read a book because I feel anxious and then I want to jump to the next thing. I am thankful for this video and to know that I’m not alone. Thank you!!!

Logic and rationality does wonders for 7s like me dealing with the FOMO. For example right now I chose to focus on copywriting as a career and I need to structure my weeks and adopt routines to learn and practice skills etc., which is insaaanely difficult for a 7. First you sacrifice by choosing one thing and then you also need to prison yourself in with repetitive routines? Cmon maaan! Haha. It's a lot of suffering. But that's where we need to go to, our growth is the ''boring 5''. Otherwise we don't catalyze an identity and don't ''amount to anything in life'' . Anyway in the first weeks I get very excited about the chosen thing but then boredom and guilt sinks in. ''I could have done x or y''. Some people will try to find a middle ground and compensate by pursuing 3+ goals/ interests at the same time instead of 10. But that usually also leads to nowhere. I have tried and failed using that approach multiple times until i finally came to my sense. What I learned is that whatever I choose to do, that thing is what I will second doubt the entire time. When you buy strawberry ice cream, you regret not buying vanilla. You always regret the choice you didn't make. Classic. I realized I will never be able to be satisfied with my current choice. So then started applying logic: ''I cannot physically and practically pursue 3 things at the same time, I tried, I cannot. I end up being scattered and achieve nearly zero progress. And i really want to be good at at least one thing.''

As a 7 I can add an even better reason to become wealthy: Wealth will solve all of my problems and I won’t have to feel or deal with any pain. Yep, that’s always in the back of my mind.

Thank you for this! Totally needed it today. 😊

@twlahue

2 ай бұрын

You are so welcome!

I thought I had bipolar disorder for a little while because it runs in my family. IT is comforting to know that this is pretty common for a 7. Side note-- any other sevens that can't drink caffeine because they are already too intense as it is?

@charissnyder5887

4 жыл бұрын

Also one thing that I don't relate to with 7 is avoiding deep relationships and keeping things surface level. I feel like my greatest joy comes from deep connections with people and I am constantly seeking out people that I can know and understand deeply.

@twlahue

4 жыл бұрын

Coffee helps me focus. Yes, we can be a little up and down sometimes.

@raenforest22

4 жыл бұрын

@@charissnyder5887 I agree. I am a thorough 7 but I am repelled by surfaceyness in others and always try to take things deep. However, when I am really feeling my own pain, there is usually a bag of cookies by my side, even if there was no money in the bank account to get said cookies.

@raenforest22

4 жыл бұрын

Charis Snyder I also cannot drink caffeine. It makes me too intense plus I have bladder issues and caffeine is an irritant.

@charissnyder5887

4 жыл бұрын

raenforest22 I think the wanting deep connections correlates w having a w6. Searching for security in your relationships

This was so immensely helpful, Tom, thank you. So much gratitude from a schizophrenic 7 here. xx

Thanks for sharing and helping from your experiences to help people invest in the improvement of self understanding. One think I learn about me as a seven is happiness is temporary entertainment that is not fulfilling. My true self seeks joy in life. I squander when the focus is temporary exitable activities. In my opinion I discover was a huge difference once I started focusing on joy purposeful activity feather than just entertainment of happiness. Thanks again for articulating. I’m still seeking ways to work on those distractions.plus willingness to keep me from experiencing feelings with others. This tool has helped me grow in courage to face my days, not permanent as I still find pockets or areas that need work. Blessings

As a 7, whenever you mention sitting in your pain, my heart sank a bit. Thank you for the information. Hard to hear but very necessary

Now that you read me for filth and I’m picking myself up from the floor 😂😂😂 sooooo goooood

I finally got over my worst FOMO by realizing that I bring the fun. So if I’m not there, it’s not going to be fun! Therefore, I’m not missing out on anything 😂

@twlahue

4 ай бұрын

Great

Awesome vid so far, I'm about halfway through. I'll come back and edit the comment later when I know more about what I'm saying. Anyways, seems pretty sweet so far. I thought that I was an enneagram 9 for a while (my MBTI is ENTP). I explained the basics of the enneagram to my Mom and she said that I was either 3, 5 or 7 (we think that she's a 2). I know that I don't care about showing achievements off to others (like 3s). I like driving a beat up car, I don't care about being statusy, I care so little about the degree I'm getting that I basically told my Capstone professor that in an essay, lol. 5? I don't feel like I'm insecure about being an expert. The idea of being about the best in a specific field is almost hard to think is possible for me, but I don't need to be one. I think that I'm decent in most fields and that isn't a sore spot for me. As far as 7s, I am pretty flighty, very enthusiastic about things that I often drop the next week or month, and I do try to have other people to rely on. Like, I don't really want to do anything unless I have other people going along that want it done. Like, part of the reason that I thought that I wasn't a 7 is because I'm pretty homebound. I asked my Mom: "How could I be a 7 when I haven't gone sight seeing or been to the beach in years (we live within an hour of the beach). She said: "I thought that you wanted to go, but you didn't want to go alone, and you didn't have the 'right' people to go with you". I was like "Whoa", that's literally what I was thinking. I feel like I am missing out since I haven't done that stuff, but I'm afraid that it will be a miserable experience if I go by myself. And lord, the parking down there and the drive and the traffic and where would I go to the restroom lol? Would I just go looking for random places if I had to go? I figured that most people just wanted to do that stuff with or without people and since I only wanted to do it if I had some fun people with, then I must just hate adventure. I don't think so anymore. Oh man, finished the vid. It's very helpful but I can tell that I have a lot of work to do. I'm thankful that I have my own room. I'm thankful that I have food and water payed for by my parents. I'm thankful that I have a car. I'm thankful that I have an awesome Grandpa. I'm thankful that I have some pretty cool aunts and uncles. I'm thankful that this stupid virus is only going to last for so long. Right now, I'm at this point: I know that there probably isn't an ideal romantic relationship and that it's always a compromise and I have to just make it work. My brain still says: "Who cares? Find out which mbti and enneagram is ideal for you and then go find that person. If it goes well, cool. If it fails, then you finally will know that settling is what happens no matter what".

You talking about picking up instruments is me. As a fellow 7 I learned banjo piano and guitar. I tried taking lessons but my teachers wanted me to learn all the theory’s but I just wanted to play a song. I stoped going to the teachers and just watched videos until I could play the song I wanted to play in the beginning. Then moved to the next instrument

I realized a little over a year ago that im not present. Its somwthing im working on. My mind is always gling on to the next thing.

I enjoy watching your videos. Thank you for sharing your insight. I am a 7w8. My 9 year- old son is (from what I can tell) a very strong 8. Do you ever teach on how to parent particular types. I have four children (he is my last) and I have had to rethink every aspect of patenting. Keep up the good work.

Hey!!! I’m a 7w8 and you have the best understandings of 7s! I know you’re a 7w6. The one difference I see in the explanations that I would offer maybe a more clearer look would be the w8 will definitely start with befriending authority unless it doesn’t work out or it involves a loved one… then that w8 will come out and they better run LOL. I think w6 is less likely to have that come out.

Hi! I just discovered that I am a 7. One HUGE take always for me is if I do this one thing, I am missing out on everything else. And that's 👌

Dr. Tom, your insight is such a gift!! Thank you!! (Married to a 7w6)

From this wonderful video. Help for 7's: Focus on one thing at a time. Don’t change insufficient now for insufficient later Slow down and fully show up to the experience Appreciate the little experiences as they are Go to 5: • Withdraw, be minimalist • Invest fully in something • Realize I don’t need anything • Anything I need is already available to me • Maybe what I already have is enough • Maybe there is nowhere else I need to be or anything else I need to do. 10 healing steps for 7’s 1. Recognize your impulses and get in the habit of observing them instead of acting on them 2. Learn to be silent, learn to be in solitude. The less stimulation you get in your life, the more satisfied you will be by the stimulation that you have in your life. 3. You don’t have to have everything at this moment. Make yourself wait. It is like a muscle, try to discipline yourself. 4. Always chose quality over quantity. More isn’t always better. 5. Make sure that what you want right now would be good for you in the long run. Ask yourself “Do I want to have done what it is I am about to do”. Realize that they are just impulses and that you don’t have to act on them, you can let them pass. 6. Happiness is a byproduct of doing something that makes a difference. 7. Be aware of your tendency to get out of control. 8. Watch what you say out loud 9. Let yourself experience the pain, the loss. It will make you better able to experience the pleasures that come from the joys in life. 10. The way you bring joy is not “We have got to go do something new or something else”, the way you experience joy is by getting in touch with gratitude.

@readcreaterepeat7727

3 жыл бұрын

Thank you so much for typing this up. I’m going to copy it down and post it on my closet door. And probably some other places too...

Absolutely spot on. Very grateful for this.

Oh my god. I’m a SOLID 7. And I have bipolar 🤭

I'm a 7w8, and this video was very uncomfortable--7s (like me!) seem like the worst people! I struggle so hard to stay in the moment and to feel my feelings (and not intellectualize them). I identified with almost everything here. This was very insightful, thank you!

Idk man I feel like sevens have it figured out. People are more harsh on sevens than needed. We don't fit your box. We have to trust ourselves and do what works for us.

@johncoffee5487

4 жыл бұрын

Kelvin Givens such a 7 thing to say lol, & this is coming from another 7

@summero-my5in

3 жыл бұрын

I agree, I feel very fortunate to be a 7 enneagram type!

Hi! Thank you again for this and the other helpful videos! Not sure what happened to my last comment. Just wanted to clarify. When I mentioned laughing during the difficult parts, I meant the parts that you brought up. They were so spot on!

Thanks for more wisdom! I'll replay the summary every week for reminder!

I actually came here for help (because during Covid especially) I need it. I need a remedy to myself and my self-destructive, self indulgent behavior. The enneagram is the braceing slap of sobriety and reality that I need. I have found this video SO helpful. Especially re: making the mundane in life fun, rather than Spending your whole life running from the boredom of the mundane. Also the insight about just eating dessert vs eating a full meal is profound and so resonant for me. “Auntie Mame” the fictional character who is the quintessential “seven type” has this signature phrase: “Live live live, life is a banquet and most poor suckers are starving to death!” How ironic that the seven may actually be starving herself to death by eating a endless series of dessert plates instead of sitting down in the present and eating the banquet in front of her. I will be soaking in this truth for a while. I sense these insights presented here the antidote to the pain that I inflict on myself (and if I look honestly, on others) by trying to avoid pain. Irony thy name is seven.

This video is gold. I only just found out about enneagrams and i honestly am super super sure i’m a 7. This feels like a video completely about me. i will really benefit from the ‘do things fun’ idea! I honestly think that 7s invented ‘Bucket lists’ hahaha

@twlahue

4 жыл бұрын

Glad you found my channel.

I am a seven, not sure which wing. Meyers Briggs ESFP. I am insanely impulsive and easily bored, often dreaming/fantasizing being somewhere more exciting...I wanted to be a cowboy/spy/police officer/paramedic/ER or OB nurse. I fled the hard work of nursing school after the first semester and drifted from job to job for years. Fell into what I am doing now and started making intentional commitments but I after 5 years I am getting bored. I also have grown in my cravings for stability. These two things are very much at war in me. This video was just what I needed to remind me to engage in healthy introspection.

I think for actors, you cant base it off of their performance. I think example Jim Carrey Plays a good 7. I don't necessarily think he himself is a 7. That I believe goes for any actor or actress or performer.

Thank you! You’re wonderful! 😊From a fellow 7w6

@twlahue

8 ай бұрын

You are so welcome!

I’m not a 7 but I’m a 6w7 and I find this fascinating thanks for sharing 🙏🤩

I am a 7 but I also feel like pain is a part of life, but I know I'll get through it and everything will end up fine in the end.

I'm a 16 year old, female, norwegian 9w1 dating an 18 year old, male, australian 7w8. That's a lot of info for a sentence, but I just wanted to thank you for your videos. I've recently been getting really into the enneagram and I've typed my friends and my boyfriend, and it's really helping me understand them. Not only them, but myself too.

@twlahue

4 жыл бұрын

Great

Oh man I can see this one is hard for you. Haha. Not got that swagger now! Get some! Right back at you, Dr Tom LaHue. Haha. Thanks once again … another good video.

@twlahue

3 ай бұрын

Rock on!

I am a 7w8 and under lockdown. I am not sure if I’ll survive another month in this state. I feel like I am losing my mind lol