Emerson 10/1/17 death rattle, post fentanyl overdose (brain tumor, sepsis, hospice, chemotherapy)
To view Emerson's story in entirety, visit emersoncrane830 or search #lovelikeEmerson
This is a video of my son, age 10, who had been given a fentanyl patch by hospice. Our nurse instructed us to cut the patches in half to deliver half the dose of fentanyl to him, however it had the opposite effect, and all of the fentanyl was being delivered in one large dose. Even though Emerson was already on hospice, he was also on chemotherapy that we were hoping would reduce his tumor size and save his life. One cut patch was put on on 9/29, the next day he had a shower and the patch came off and we applied another cut patch to be sure he didn't miss his medication. Essentially he received a whole patch worth of medication in the span of a few hours. His hands turned blue, he was struggling to breathe. Because he was so obviously suffering, we took him to our local children's hospital after this video was made. They gave him Narcan, he came out of the overdose, but he developed a high fever. They weren't sure whether the fever was related to his chemotherapy or if he had contracted a pathogen, so due to their indecisive answer about the cause of the fever, we requested he be transferred to the hospital where his neuro-oncologist and neurosurgeon were located. During the 30 minute flight, despite my and my husband's request to not give him any more fentanyl, the flight nurses gave him another dose intravenously because he became agitated in the flight (we later learned his other IV had infiltrated and was likely the cause of his discomfort). Emerson went into respiratory distress after the next round of fentanyl/Narcan and his heart rate went into tachycardia (around 200BPM) during that flight and he never recovered. After a day of trying to bring his heart rate and respiration rate down, he died in mine and my husband's arms the next day at 9pm.
In the end, the official cause of death was listed at sepsis, with complications from a pilocytic astrocytoma and DIC (disseminated intravascular coagulation), though I feel the fentanyl played a part due to the fact that he never came out of respiratory distress following the last administration of it. Having a tumor and being on chemotherapy is hard, add in sepsis, and then top it with an overdose and he had no chance of recovery it seems. The overdose, however was just one of the things that I wish we could have changed for him. Ultimately his death couldn't have been prevented, but he definitely suffered from this overdose, and had he not had to go through it, he could have died at home peacefully as we had hoped.
We've been asked why we have shared this. We have shared all parts of our son's story, including the hardest parts. These are things that most people never have to see, thank God they don't have to see it happen to their own child. When our son was suffering from this condition -- which he recovered from as he came out of overdose -- we wanted to know what "the death rattle" sounded like so we could prepare if this really was the end for him or not. We searched youtube for examples, but there were few. I sat with him and vacuumed his throat from the fluid that was continually building while his CNS was impaired. After this stopped, we still had the video that we made to show to his doctor. We added a lot of his videos to a list about his life, I had no idea this video would ever be watched over 5000 times. You choose to watch or not. Dying is a part of living, this is just one of those parts.
We have had many people message us since they have watched this video, some saying their faith has been strengthened because they were led to his other videos, and some said they were using fentanyl and this video makes them want to not use it. Every time I think about making this video private, I think of those people and how out of such bad could come some good, and I leave it another day. I hope that Emerson's and our suffering can be used for good for someone. Emerson has always had a way with pointing people to Jesus. He was adamant that Jesus came to him before his death, and it's for that reason solely that we have shared every part of his journey from life to death.
Childhood cancer is ugly, funding is limited, and it's an under-served population. We hope this video serves to be educative, preventative, and maybe someone will link to his Facebook page and see the love that he had, the love that God blessed his soul and spirit with, and they will come to see the light in this world of darkness.
Пікірлер: 653
I feel like I’m intruding on this young mans privacy. RIP sir, I’m very sorry.
Once you hear the dealth rattle it's something you never forget.
Losing a child is the worst pain. I lost my daughter in 2003 and I have to make myself get up in the morning every day. God bless your family, and may your son rest in peace.
@sophiemack235
5 жыл бұрын
I read your comment & so I just want to send you a big hug & X,can't imagine how awful this must be for parents of children dieing no matter what the age or reason. I hope you are doing ok
@rigormortis1355
Жыл бұрын
My condolences.
@esternocleidomastoideo4656
Жыл бұрын
I lost my son in a car accident 😔
It absolutely does help people to be prepared and reduce the shock/trauma of watching a loved one die if they have awareness of what to expect. You can’t get this out of a book or website. Brave parents with big hearts. Thank you for educating the public. 🙏🏼
@samanthaevoli5955
Жыл бұрын
You are totally right. If I ever saw this kind of stuff without being prepared beforehand, it’d destroy me
I am a nursing student and trying to learn what a death rattle sounds like. For many people it's too personal to post. Thank you for sharing and helping me learn so I know what to listen for when I treat my future patients!
The death rattle is a haunting experience. I remember hearing it from my deceased grandmother, I'll never forget it.
I'm so Sorry for your loss of Emerson and that you weren't able to have him pass at home. My 12 year old Daughter Greycin passed away February 16th, 2018. Vanderbilt made it possible to transport her home. The day before she was transported home we had to meet with Hospice to prepare us for what could happen as Greycin passed (you can't completely prepare yourself for something like this though). The death rattle was one of the things that they said could happen. I was terrified. As if knowing that your about to lose your child wasn't bad enough you have to worry about what could happen in her final moments. They also said that it could drag out for a period of time. But in our case she never took another breath and it was very peaceful. We got to hold her and feel her last heartbeat. From one broken hearted mama to another...I send Prayers for You and Your Family.
@mr.dolittledooboo3519
5 жыл бұрын
I'm so sorry for your loss
@dvdgway
5 жыл бұрын
I am so deeply sorry for the loss of your daughter. This breaks my heart
@Rocket9944
5 жыл бұрын
Traci O , i saw your videos, That is so sad.
@morejoe2.023
5 жыл бұрын
Thats my birthday turning 17 in a few months I'm so sorry sorry for your loss.
@melissalemar5372
5 жыл бұрын
Traci O I cannot even begin to tell you how sorry I am for the loss of your sweet angel. My heart aches tremendously for you.
That was heartbreaking to watch. No family deserves to experience something like that. You have my best wishes and may your son's soul rest in peace.
What a beautiful name, Emerson . I like it very much. Wishing you all the best . From Germany
Thank you for sharing your son's tragic story and for being so open, raw and transparent. I hope you and your family are able to find peace. Bless you all.
God bless your family and Emerson.. am a 45 yr old father sitting here crying my eyes out.. so sorry u ever had to experience this.. my heart goes out to your family
I was diagnosed with a pilocytic astrocytoma on my cerebellum and brain stem about 4 years ago while i was a freshman in highschool. Im so sorry that you all went through this and know you have the love and support of so many who will stand by your side during this time. I will never know how you feel but i do know a bit about how my diagnosis affected me and my family and it truly is a shame that families go through this experience. Thank you for spreading awareness and providing this video. It will drive people to help without a doubt. Much love ❤️
It's nice that you explain to the complainers of this post the reasons why you placed this up on KZread and made it public. However, in my humble opinion, you do not owe ANYONE an explanation as to why you did this; again, it's nice that you give them one, but you do you and follow your heart and what YOU think your son would want. Again, this is just my humble opinion. I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm a mother of a 23 year old son who has type one diabetes and I worry every single day for him. I cannot imagine the hole in your heart. God bless all of you, and may your son rest peacefully with the Angels and in His love.
I'm so sorry for your loss. Somehow I came across this video and it shook me up to my core. Your son Emerson looks very very similar to my 10 year old son, Sean. I won't take our time together for granted. This makes me appreciate everything more. Thank You for sharing.
My grandma made this exact sound when she died. She had lung cancer. She too was a believer in the Lord so I will get to see her again. I'm so sorry for your loss. No parent should EVER have to bury their child
I heard those sounds when my last living Grandpa ( my Dad's Dad) was on his last. When I heard the death rattles, it sounded like a coffee maker making coffee. My grandpa passed Nov 3rd 2002. RIP, Grandpa.
It’s incredibly noble of you to post this video of this painful moment in the lives of everyone in your family, and likely your community as well. Now, in addition to whatever your beliefs are about the afterlife, Emerson lives on as an educator. And although I never met your son, I’m honored to have learned from him, and thankful that you allowed me to do so. Thank you.
This video made me go talk to my sister and try to repair a deeply strained relationship. I know others may not see why this is here but I truly realize how important life is after watching this. I’m so sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing your sons beautiul life with us.
I’m very sorry this happened to you young man. RIP Emerson.
This story brang me to tears. I'm so sorry for your loss. I had a brother who died at the age of 11 due to a tainted blood transfusion back in 1988. The blood was tainted with HIV/AIDS. He was very sick sick for a long time. He was battling leukemia at the time of the blood transfer. My parents have never been the same.
God bless you. Watching this video and learning that this is your son makes me so sad for you. I looked up the term “death rattle” after reading recent medical studies that suggest that this sound may not be as painful as it appears to be. I like to think that your son went peacefully, and the fentanyl may have helped to ease him into the next life. My heart mourns for you, I just had to say it. Take care.
@susanjackson3689
6 жыл бұрын
As a nurse ..when u walk into work and can hear this as u approach the room you already know the rest of the story.Suctioning is minimally effective and robs the patient of what oxygen they are getting .Sometimes its as much for the family .It makes them feel at least we are trying to clear the airway . Atropine drops for terminal secretions ...that's what nurse verbiage calls this pooling of fluids helps some .Its just sad to see n hear.I watched my mother do this at end stage cancer and the sound of the suction machine haunts me to this day...now as the nurse I have to do it.Oddly its one of the first things I ask where its kept when going to a new job.
@sophiemack235
6 жыл бұрын
@@susanjackson3689 X
@rodola647
5 жыл бұрын
Susan M God bless you with strength for serving others with compassion in this time of sadness and mourning. Thank you.
Don't know you or your son or how I even got here but God bless you for sharing your son through his death. I agree with you, ALOT of people, including myself hear of the "death rattle" but have no clue what it is. I was told the same thing about my mother. I wish now I would of found your video earlier. It's terrible and heart breaking to watch but it is what really happens so thank you again. I'm very sorry for your loss. 🙏❤️
That sound is heart breaking I swear I feel that the doc should be held somewhat responsible for Emerson passing ..as a doc your supposed to know exactly how much medication to give to a patient
I’m sorry but I can’t stop watching your videos of Emerson I just watched the video of Emerson telling his dad that he loves him ..oh man my heart is torn 😢
I am so sorry for the loss of your son
I assume Emerson was under hospice care during his last few weeks on earth? It’s so tragic to see a child go thru this. Thanks for sharing.
I'm so sorry for your loss ,he will always be in your hearts😞
I’m so sorry your child was treated this way while you were so helpless :(
I would want my son or daughter to go on. I could not let my child live like this. This is heart wrenching...
God bless you guys. I am so sorry. You’re the strongest people in the world. 🇺🇸
I sat with my sister the last few hours before she passed away stroking her forehead listening to her breathing it broke my heart listening to the death rattle. My heart still breaks 4 years later missing her every day. R.I.P
Reading that description broke my heart. 😔 Poor family. Everybody should hug their kids a little longer and be thankful they have their health.
He was a strong kid, he was fighting many things and still kept going. God bless him, his family and his friend.
Omg😭I'm so sorry for your loss. Emerson looked like my 16-year-old son, which hurts even more 😢
Losing your child would be devastating I’m so sorry for your tremendous loss. Hoping you’ve found some peace in these years
So so sorry for you loss my heart fe3 so sad i started to cry and saw few more video. Buy now he is not suffering and he is a angel watcher over you all and he live in your heart. Im a mom off 2 my daughter 5yr old and my son 3yr old i could only images how painful it is god bless
My heart is broken for your loss. What a beautiful boy.RIP angel.
I'm so sorry for your loss. He looks like a very sweet boy.
I’m a nursing assistant and this would’ve broken my heart to watch. My father in law died from sepsis last June awful awful thing to die from. It’s too late by time it’s found out to be sepsis. Love and prayers to u all. Wales uk xxxx
@mlg445
5 жыл бұрын
Lol that's a lie, my dad has been septic at least twice if not more. Hospital saved him. He also has dementia and Parkinson's. He breathed like this and had to be on a ventilator high dose antibiotics for a week to two. Don't lie to people or fear monger. Fact is every single body is different when it comes to any illness.
May that boy rest in peace. Our hearts go out to you guys, no one deserves a loss this heavy.
Sorry for your loss but also relieved for your son and happy he will feel no more pain and is with God. X
RIP Emerson... Love from Serbia.
All my heart and love goes to this brave young man and his family. Emerson will always be remembered.
so i googled death rattle because i saw it being mentioned in a comic and then i'm hit with this reality check, condolences to you and may your son look over you in heaven
I am so sorry for your loss.Heaven received another angel.What a sweet sweet boy.❤️
I’m incredibly sorry for your loss. I’m only 22 and do not know what it’s like to have a child. But I can’t imagine what you as well as your son had to go through. I truly hope he is in a better place in gods palace. He may be gone from your sight but he’ll never be gone in your heart. God bless.
Such a young lad. May God bless him and keep him. My condolences.
Thank you for sharing Emerson’s story. May your pain be lifted in time ❤️
I am so SO sorry for your loss, but I hope you’re able to find comfort knowing that he is no longer suffering. I know this must’ve been so difficult to share with the world but with 500,000+ views, just know that that’s 500,000+ people that are now more educated and more prepared. I wish you the absolute best ❤️
I’m SO sorry for your loss. I lost my great grandfather, so I feel you, and no one should have to go through this. But Emerson is in a better place now.
Im really sorry ma’am. God bless his soul, and you and your family 😔
I'm an emt, I am truly sorry for your loss...my thoughts and prayers are for you, him, and his family. Rest and rejoice with your maker.
To be absent from the body is to be present with our Lord. So hard to watch. God rest his soul , And may our loving Father wrap you in His grace and comfort. Please Lord , Bless his family.
I am very sorry for your loss, I lost my neighbor, brother, friend & family today. He was a big part of my life & I wish this feeling towards no one on earth. 💔
I received Fentynal patches during my chemotherapy and they never told me if the patch " overheats" it dumps a huge dose at once. I almost died from an od because they never warned me. Bastards almost killed me from neglect.
I can't imagine how helpless you must've felt but he is in a better place now, thank you for making a positive out of this it shows what remarkable people you are. God bless.
I lost my brother to a fentanyl patch in 2012. Thank you for sharing this and raising awareness.
It took great courage for you to post this video. The streets of heaven are too crowded with angels like your son.
I clicked on this video because I was unsure of the title and thumbnail. I wish I never did because I couldn't even watch the whole video. My heart pours out to the family. If my daughter ever went down hill I don't know what I would do with myself.. thank you for sort of sharing the video!
Sorry for you and your family's loss and that Emerson suffered
a parent should never ever have to bury a child.
💜 still think of you often Emerson Rest In Peace little man
Thank you so much for sharing. I am an in nursing school and an aspiring pediatric nurse. I was looking for an educational video because I could not find one. In nursing school, we spent several lectures and had many assignments on overdose of narcotics. Your son should not have had to go through that- it breaks my heart. Thank you for taking the opportunity to educate. I will keep your family in my prayers ❤️
I was there when my uncle developed the death rattle on his final day.... I was also there when he took his last breath and said goodbye to this world... something I will never forget 💔
I'm so sorry sweetheart for your loss. Just by reading below I can see you loved your son and fought for him. Bless you honey
So sorry for your loss.
I’m tearing up as I type this, but I’m so sorry that you and your family have had to go through such a devastating loss, and that your son had to endure all he did during his time here on Earth. He was courageous, no doubt. Thank you for sharing such a sensitive video and journey. I hope you are all able to rejoice knowing that he is free from suffering and worry now, regardless of religious views. G-d bless you.
I’m sorry for what you went through. I went through years of medical mistakes that led to the deaths of 3 of my family members. I’m glad you shared your story to help others.
Condolences to you and your family, may he rest in peace.
I’m glad you posted this. It really puts life into perspective. May your son rest easy. I’m sorry for your loss
I am so sorry for what happened to your precious son.. I can't emagine how it is possible the nurse on the flight gave him another shot!! Without your concent! My heart goes out to you 💙
I’m not a type of person to cry if a loved one dies. Instead, I will give them the last thing they will ever need. A smile. R.I.P. May your soul rest peacefully.
Prayers to your family and may your son rest in piece. I lost my brother to fentanyl when I found him deaf a few years back . Such a dangerous substance. I hope you find peace.
Thank you so much for uploading and sharing his life.
I'm sorry for the loss of your son
I know this was a year ago but my deepest condolences for your loss❤
Samantha Crane Prayers and hugs to you. You have such AMAZING strength, I wish I just a piece of it. God bless you.
I am so sorry for the loss of your baby boy. Thank you for sharing with us. God bless you.
I used to be on Fentanyl for my CRPS. It's a chronic pain illness that makes your body feel as if it is on fire. Anyway, I accidentally overdosed on Fentanyl the exact same way and was brought back after flat-lining for 10 minutes. I was in a coma for 8 days and in full renal failure. The doc's were telling my parents I had minimal brain activity and would live my life as a vegetable on dialysis and they were encouraging them to just pull the plug. My sister, who is a nurse, said..hell no. Since my kidney's had failed my body was swollen up like a beached whale with all the i.v. lines and the drugs had no way to escape. She told the doc's to put me on dialysis and she knew I would fight. So they did and after two times in dialysis they got the Fentanyl out and I woke up. A month later my kidneys started regenerating on their own which was a miracle. Basically, I want to say I am so very sorry for your loss but I relate and think Fentanyl is evil and should be taken off the market. It is too dangerous to be used as a prescription for people.
I come from a town of meth and oxy addicts. I hate what the pharma companies have done to this country. I am so saddened to see this video. My heart will always go out to you.
I’m sorry your son had to go through this as well as mom and dad, brothers and sisters (if there are any) and loved ones and friends. I read the description before continuing with this video. My thoughts and prayers for everyone
This breaks my heart, my biggest respect to you and your son, who fought until the end. My sister died in 2004 in a car accident, the doctors said it was a fast painless death. But watching a loved one leave this earth must be one of the hardest things to ever experience. Everything that lives will eventually die, but no one ever deserves to die with Cancer, specially children, my biggest wish is to soon discover a better way to cure cancer. Bless you and you're beautiful family.
Saw this young mans first video. Have to say....i dont think i could have been as strong. Im 45. After watching...feel very blessed. Rip young man. Brave soul
I am sorry for your loss, this seemed like it was very disturbing to you, it was disturbing to me at least. May he Rest In Peace. I hope your family lives well.
Im so sorry for your pain.
Rip little hero. Braver than anyone here. What a little legend.
God bless you, and I am so sorry about the loss of your beautiful son. My dad also transitioned from Fentanyl, and it was the single and only medication that delivered him (10-29-2015). I was so thankful. Years later, I married my spouse from Mexico and learned that I could have gotten it more easily - my dad suffered very much. I wish I knew then what I know now.
This is an absolute nightmare- you have my sympathies. You are an incredibly strong woman. I will pray for you and your family. God bless you.
I'm sorry for your loss, it's terrible that this young man lost his life so early, not only to overdose (that was not your, or his own fault, but the fault of negligence) but because of all of his other medical ailments.
Those patches are so dangerous. From one mother to another my heart goes out to you . we lost my uncle at age 3 to brain tumors. And my uncle Ronnie to sinus tumours . this breaks my heart
Your story is absolutely heart breaking. My goal as a nurse is to NEVER let anything like this happen.
I was lying next to my dad on his last night. I told my mom to sleep in my bed and get some rest because she had spent a couple of sleepless nights in that bed. I was all awake and reading up about the last stages of lung cancer and came across the term "death rattle". It's only after a month that I had the courage to look up that term again and came across this video. You will meet your son again, as I will my dad on the day that HE returns. They're not in pain anymore and they are with the Lord, that I am sure.
Samantha crane I dont how i got on this page but i am glad as to educate me. I am so sorry for your loss.god bless you snd your family
Thank you so much for sharing this personal moment. It is an invaluable piece of education for many people, for different reasons. I am so, so sorry that you lost your son xx
So sorry for your loss Thank you for sharing It’s hard but brave
Lungs full of fluids . Been there watching my mom and dad die :( when thier limbs go cold death is minutes to hour away. Being there is not the best thing . Imo .
God bless you and you family. May Emerson rest in peace.
I had to watch my dad die and it is a horrible thing to go through I know . Dad just stopped breathing and he made no sounds at all and he was wide awake when he went. I’m sorry you lost you’re son Mrs but you will be with him again as I will my daddy.
@TheHenderson
5 жыл бұрын
Im sorry. Truly am. I watched my father pass away also. 2 months ago tomorrow. It's really hard...
I preciate the explanation together with this video, that makes this video not so creepy anymore.This is a terrible death. May God be with you.
May he rest in peace And I'm so sorry for your loss(edit)I couldn't read your loss without shedding a tear