When my grandparents died, I didn’t find it unsettling. They all lived full lives. The sadness was brief, it wasn’t true gut wrenching grief. When I was 26 I lost my 20 year old sister. That was true grief. It turned me inside out. Unless I lost a baby or a husband, I don’t think any grief could ever top that. It’s somewhat reassuring to have already lived through the worst grief at my age. Through that process, I discovered grief wasn’t the problem. Running from and avoiding grief was the problem. Once I stopped, sat in it, acknowledged it, breathed and felt it a la Vipassana; I realised the pain I was afraid to feel, the pain I ran from for yeeeears (and rightly so, nobody prepares us for it), was only sent to heal. I haven’t experienced significant loss in 13 years. I’m probably due. I’d like to think I could manage loss in a healthier way next time. To face it head on, to feel it fully and maybe even smile knowing it’s a fact of life? Depending on the age and cause of death, I may resist and wrestle with it again, forgetting everything I learned? If fully acknowledged and felt in full conscious sobriety throughout all of the body, the grief process could potentially be completed in hours or days, not years… Allowing one to return to living. I think grief IS life and living. What emotion is more powerful than grief? Grief is only a problem if it’s destructive, prolonged or when it’s allowed to rob someone of their remaining life and relationships.

@mckailyadams8531

3 ай бұрын

I heavily resonate with this. I’m 22yo and recently lost my 21yo best friend. I was able to fully experience grief as the most intense emotion my body has come across. I also agree with you, if you allow yourself to feel it fully you can come to acceptance in a matter of days or months instead of years. Thanks for sharing ✨

@thaliakate444

3 ай бұрын

@@mckailyadams8531 21 and 22. Very young to face death and grief. I hope you have support. Nothing teaches appreciation for the finitude of life like the loss of the young. You’re embracing wisdom so that’s a good sign. I like to say, when one is gone, all that’s left to do is LIVE for two. Take great care of yourself, truly, that’s the most important thing in life and especially in grief. ❤️‍🩹

@mckailyadams8531

2 ай бұрын

Thank you🙏I really appreciate it:)

@peacelovejoyandhappiness

Ай бұрын

Thank you for your comments, I loved reading and understanding them. What has helped me in the past with grieving were the classes local churches provide called, "Grief Share." These classes are wonderful and available for anyone. The cost of the class is only the cost of the book which is approximately around $10.00.

@marcia3302

Ай бұрын

Der Schmerz und Verlust wird potentiert durch die Umstände , in denen man zurückgelassen wird . Wenn das durch Unfall geschieht und eine Person allein und verwirrt im fremden Land alleine steht mit tausenden von "Scherben" vom Verstorbenen vor dem Gesicht , die man in Ordnung bringen muss , und man selbst sich am Ertrinken fühlt , ist es sehr schwer "Stoisch" zu bleiben . Später , viel später habe ich Marcus Aurelius entdeckt , nachdem ich schon aus Fragilität , Schmerz und Glaube an falsche Freunde sehr viele schlechte Erfahrungen gesammelt habe . Stoicism hat mir geholfen die letzten Jahre zu überleben . Es ist wie es ist , und ich kann nur sehr begrenzt Einfluss nehmen . Man kann sagen , daß Stoicism mir geholfen hat das Leben irgendwie zu navigieren . ( aber ich bin nicht gut dabei ...) Vielen Dank für Ihre Vorträge und die Art wie sie präsentiert werden . Ich schätze sie sehr.

Thank you for creating this channel. We, in this modern society, need this ancient philosophical grounding. I find this channel very cathartic, contemplative, meditative, and peaceful. I appreciate your insights and assistance with recentering. Please keep it up. The wisdom of the ancients is timeless.

Love your calming clear tone of voice , love your style , love your ambience , love your stoicism and knowledge you share... Favorite part 9:46 - End . Big fan here keep it up because you help and inspire us a lot !

I appreciate it! Keep recording for us.

I love this format of an intimate conversation across time and space. Thanks for providing these sober and eloquent messages in a time where wisdom is forgotten and washed away by 7-second KZread shorts and the bussling of modern lives stress and vices.

Just found you a couple days ago. This video in particular hits home for me. I spent my 18th birthday next to my dying father, something I took extremely rough, like to the point of obsession for 10 years. Back then I wasn’t living my life, but living through the past and slowly destroying myself with drink. A shell of a person, I was no better than dead myself. I’m still left paying the price for putting my life on hold for so long. I wish I would’ve heard something like this back then, and learned to ground myself in this very moment and to appreciate what is right in front of me. Thoughts and how you direct them are crucial to the life experience you create for yourself. I hope this channel catches on like wildfire, what you’re doing here is significant. May you go on to touch many lives sir.

What even are you!! This is a blessing that I found this channel in this very 'dark' time of my life. I am sorry that I have let myself be affected by the misfortune that I still kind of am right now. But I will get better and finally come to a point of indifference.

Truth, simple, and a moment to face and grow from, thankful for the moment to let us grow.

Grief is a natural part of life, we do not question when the trees loose their leaves in winter, we accept it as a natural part of the trees existence. In this journey of life, we will all be met with seasons of loss, and during this times we will grieve. We will grieve the loss of our loved ones, we will grieve the hopes and dreams of imagined futures. If to be fully alive is to be present in each moment, then being present in grief when it presents itself is also being fully alive. and this will look different each day, sometime grief knocks you down and being present in it is to surrender to this fact, sometimes it even smiles at you and gives you new perspective or a joyful memory. Whatever guest grief brings at your door on a given moment, take it all in, it's as natural to life as our breath. Grief is not separate from living, in fact nothing quite sobers and you up and makes you fully present than when you lose a loved one, everything else is trivial next to it, it is a reminder that we are merely passing moments in this life span. Its 3 years since I lost my little brother suddenly at the age of 26. Death opens the very depth of your soul, it resets your entire being.

@Novacynthia

2 ай бұрын

Yes, grief can open a door to compassion and wisdom, may we pass through it’s corridor with these gifts~

To expand the conversation albeit not from a standpoint of being familiar with the cultural practice and context per se, we don’t need to only take that others reaching out with condolences means they are projecting upon us and that, as suggested here, we must resist. There is an expansive reading that rather they are seeking to made known they are available to us. That they will share their resources (money) with us as well. If death is in ways a separation and departure, then how poignant it is that connection and available presence springs forth. The resistance to not fall in the first place is perhaps paradoxically acting in fear of falling to begin with. The issue isn’t whether we fall or not, it’s will we be flexible. Whether that’s fairly immediate or after several or many years. Will we have the flexibility to live, to grieve, to give love, to receive love. Separately, and this is just IMO. There’s a mention of “a philosopher king” and it appears an implicit meaning that somehow lends credence or a supreme moral authority. In other disciplines, Marcus Aurelius isn’t held in quite the same revered esteem as he is in the popular contemporary Stoicism circle. It was jarring to realise the contrast. All to say, if framings of his work bring value and/or are helpful then that’s great. Yet IMO there needs to be a tempered and measured engagement. Lastly a broader caution around how pop Stoicism is often structured and engaged with is that there is this sense of edicts being laid out. That they cut through the BS and point to the one true way. Certainly there is lessons and useful perspectives/advice to be had; equally IMO it moves towards followers or those who wish/seek to adhere to it a rigidity of being that IMO is not entirely conducive or a rich, reliable bedrock to human wellbeing. In simplistic reduction just to illustrate, pop Stoicism urges individuals to be “strong” (perhaps an image of a warrior) this is in contrast to many other understandings (some of which with empirical findings) of what leads to good human wellbeing, is at least in one part, flexibility. All to say, as suggested in another video on this channel, there’s a disadvantage and advantage to everything (socioeconomic wealth and status was the example there). Perhaps the same cautionary note can be applied onto Stoicism itself.

Your problem is either in the past or in the future. I needed to hear that. Thank you. I’m new to your channel and like the ambiance and very calming tone of your voice, sounds like an asmr to me. Nice filming too.

I get the message here, but you need to be careful with grief. You do need to feel grief. You need to process it. Minimizing grief to "something that happens to everyone" doesn't make it less impactful to YOU. Masking or repressing feelings to live in a philosophical and stoic world can be dangerous in the long run if done incorrectly. We are human beings who are designed to feel.

@colemorton9338

3 ай бұрын

The lesson is to not allow the world to determine how we "should" experience life, struggle, death etc. To feel sadness for someones death is unavoidable for most peopl and usually healthy, but to "grieve" in the way most of the world defines it is to accept that ones behaviour "should" be changed by it, this is the problem, there is no reason why ones behaviour, actions, and routine should change as a result of any external condition, including death of a loved one. In addition a loved one would not wan't that for you, they would wan't you to honor their life by continuing to live yours to it's fullest extent while keeping their memory in mind as you do so.

@tristecherie7464

3 ай бұрын

I think maybe it’s the grief being an adjective rather than a transitory emotion. They can be limiting, esp with context of his grandma and the letter

@dinsfire8489

3 ай бұрын

it's not about masking feelings, it's about choosing to reframe the mindset typically attached to someone going through grief or any given situation. of course we are designed to feel. it's our feelings that make us human. how we respond to those feelings is what makes us who we are. do we have to respond to loss in a way that leaves us devastated? certainly not. is it okay to respond to a loss by feeling devastated? absolutely. stoicism isn't about becoming some unfeeling monster. it's about taking on life with virtues in hand. we all feel, we all experience life & it's ups & downs. none of us are perfect nor should we expect perfection. we all experience loss, & some of them are sure to cause us great grief, no matter how stoic someone can be. we all have a breaking point. there's no one handbook on how to deal with grief, but there are plenty of ways to go about it.

@MA-mh2hd

2 ай бұрын

I understood his message, you're right he should've framed it correctly, personally , my father passed away a couple of weeks ago, I can tell you I tolerated that well, I accepted it since he was old and sick , I knew he was going to go at any time for a whole year, but when it happened, it is my relatives who made it harder, because of the traditions ,they made me think that i should be grieving, and that made me feel something was wrong with me, or that the sadness would come to me later, I still deal with it so his words is helpful for me, If you're resilient, Don't let the world convince you otherwise.

@ishatariq3892

2 ай бұрын

When you deal with life primarily as a soul, anything that happens to your body/mind is definitely felt but from the lens of your soul you get the authority to deal with it also as an observer, an experimentalist, a therapist. Solely experiencing life as body/mind leads to a very intense and often immature way of dealing with it.

Überragender Content und cooler Typ. Heute morgen dachte ich noch, dass es zu wenig Deutsche gibt, die diese Philosophie in sich und nach außen tragen. Umso begeisterter bin ich dass ich über deinen Kanal gestoßen bin ❤ In Deutschland wird man verachtet, wenn man nicht möglichst lange über den Tod eines Bekannten oder Verwandten trauert. Dass dies kompletter Wahnsinn und Unsinn ist, spüre ich schon so lange. Und auch für solche Gedanken wird man verachtet. Ich denke das liegt an der fehlenden Bewusstheit der Gesellschaft

An excellent video. With age comes the realization of what truly merits concern and what does not

this channel is amazing! thank you. Greetings from Colombia.

I'm thinking how I give my sympathy to those who lost their someone they love. Sometimes I just want to give flowers or hug in messages. I have a story I have a classmate who lost his dad. I feel how he grieves I feel the same way when my mother died and when he received my message I feel he changed his perception on grieving. Yes true everything happens to everyone. There's also one circumstance when my father died we heard why we didn't cry. How can we cry if we saw him so much suffering when he was on bed of illness. We surrender him totally to the source , we accept it that his sufferings was gone.

Loss is difficult. We think we own people. I have lost loved ones to death, but no loss is as bitter as a loss of a relationship.

Im struggling with grief that feels consuming. Its a huge shadow in my life trying to accept the idea everything we are or those we love or admire just ceases and is gone forever never to see, touch, speak to or experience again. I know others seem to view it in various ways but for me this is like a living horror. Thank you for sharing this perspective. I am failing in the moment but want to do better.

Loved this. ❤

Brilliant. Thank you.

I agree wholeheartedly. Thank you. I am grateful for life. Mine & others. A friend passed recently, I looked up a photo to see what she looked like when we met. Bright, beautiful, happy. She will remain in my heart this way. We all have something to bring, spiritual gifts, giving our time to sharing the beauty of the universe, sharing our truths, being one as a collective. This doesn’t take place overnight, that’s the beauty of life. Seeing the urgency for change, accepting change is the catalyst to living out our soul’s purpose.

Live in the now. Wonderful advice. Great video

Needed this today, thank you. I'm 24 and I've been feeling really overwhelmed recently with thoughts of the future, uncertainty and my place in the world. I've been making a point of looking up at the sky and the stars more, it's reassuring to know that's a step in the right direction and your insight allows me to reframe my thought process towards keeping that attitude of presence and mindfulness alive. Much appreciated, thank you

@deborah9384

Ай бұрын

@vampire_5785 thank you. Your words are a gust of fresh air. I have witnessed so many of your generation speaking your truth. You all are our future, strength, and direction. We all find our own truth in ourselves, as you know. Once in a blue moon, a person with insight, wisdom & love for humanity comes along and we find him here when we’re ready. I’m glad you’re here. Please continue to share. ❤

@vampire_5785

Ай бұрын

@@deborah9384 Absolutely made my day reading that, thank you so much for your kind words

Powerful message. I needed this. Thank you.

I have been trying to cut diet soda out of my diet entirely--something I really struggle with. When you were speaking about how when you put things off until tomorrow, you are failing yourself in the moment and not rising to the challenge--I was in the middle of drinking a Diet Coke. I got up and dumped the rest of it down the sink. Thank you.

I understand that we are all unique children of God. However, I have you saved under my playlist as, "Accepting The Universe - Keanu Reeves." Thank you for all that you do and the advice from God you provide. I love your channel.

@AniketKhanal2009

Ай бұрын

Keanu Reeves hahaha

@peacelovejoyandhappiness

Ай бұрын

@@AniketKhanal2009 🥰🥰🥰

Thank you for sharing your wisdom ❤ grief is such a unique thing. Whenever I've had to grieve someone or something, I've processed it a bit differently between each person or pet. I think it's really important to let the feelings come and go in an organic way without expectations or judgement

I recently lost a grandmother, and like you state, I Chose not to grieve and, more or less, not form an opinion about the situation. Moreover, having served and having been surrounded by death, the wise would learn that death should not be a catalyst for mysery and grieving but a reminder of the ephemeral and fleeting reality of life. And rather than become listless or cynical at how pointless it all is one should choose to bask in what a blessed and rare opportunity to experience life. By living, the dead walk with us.

👍 . Godspeed 🙏

Thank for your lessons. Love the new camera scene.

Incredible video

So easy to feel defeated ...i really needed this today. Sometimes it all hits really hard. Thats when i have to regroup and regain my footing .

Love these deep and intimate conversations 💜💜💜

Brilliant

I just discovered this amazing channel, thank you for sharing! For me its perfect timing, Its exactly the guidance I needed 🙏I am so grateful to encounter these wise words and to feel as they are said for me. You have a true gift of teaching and healing. I really feel this is changing my life for the better. Sending love and appreciation to everyone struggling right now, we are safe, we are loved, we are enough. Peace!

Thank you for this message

Thank you. Perfect timing for your thoughts. I am grateful. Peace to you.

Now I understand why you have all these philosophical knowledge and the aptitude to dissect a subject and extract the essence of it including the impact on human’s mind and soul.❤

@WillCasallas

24 күн бұрын

Reading the ancient Stoics will explain it all at the end. The thing is, at first it may sound weird, impossible, like it's not human; but the deeper you read it, the more you understand it and find way it's the way to live, to really live.

resonates, much appreciated.

Sorry for your loss. Thanks for another good video.

Im so sorry for your loss. I also lost my grandmother about a year ago.

Enlightening message as am busy crushing.

Thanks for this! 😊

I agree that everything that is good is still good, for me meaning: i still have a lot to be appreciative of, from how far I've come and, what I've overcome, where I'm at (even if I feel like so many things are hitting me at once) I do have many things to be grateful for. BUT Grieving in your own way, is okay!! I agree with everything here, but I also acknowledge that IT IS okay to cry and feel your feelings as they come, but remember to breathe in and out, take care of our self, and live in the moment because it will be okay.

I appreciate this !!!! I’m changing my life

needed this today thanks

New subscriber!!🎉🎉

Thank you for this it was the video I needed today.

love you!!!

i needed to hear someone say this 🙂

I was born in Bad Homburg, Germany 🇩🇪 but raised in San Francisco.🙂

❤❤❤

What if you are unhappy in the present because you will never in the future change what you need to be happy. Truly happy…. Sometimes I think people don’t know what true suffering is!!!! It’s so easy to talk about the past and future and the present being the only moment that counts. But when even the present is unbareble it’s like you only surviving each day…. 😢

Thanks!!

❤❤❤❤

Nice lighting

Please accept my deepest condolences. I am assuming you were very close to your grandmother.

I don't know if it's appropriate to ask this but I'm really curious, did you shed any tears when you received the news that she's no more? My hands are shaking as I'm typing this because I'm afraid this might be insensitive of me. Forgive me.

Thank you so much ❤

Love this 🤍

Thank You

Any wisdom for when living in the moment only leaves yourself stuck doing nothing? Almost like being lazy

I'm sad feeling guilty and tired of life 😢

Whats of more importance...living...or...surviving.

Maybe this moment consists of the past and the future, and thats why they haunt us.

Thank you 🤍

Mein Beileid für deine Oma ❤

Like and comment before watching because of the title and thumbnail - think God uses uses everything to speak to us - even when He's not saying anything🙏

too bad we need money, back to work

Do you believe in successive lives? Or, do you think everything ends with death?

I like the ending message but it's not emphasized at the beginning. At the start, it almost seemed like grieving is invalidated. --- It's natural and instinctive human behaviour to grieve from loss.. in fact there are stages.. it is more depressing and harder to heal if your feelings are invalidated because you're told the need to be rational.

Why choose living?

@jonrixbus

2 ай бұрын

Good question. Maybe because of the weirdness of it all. We are all dying, some slowly, some fast. Everyone in this world is lost in some way, no one chose to be alive. Personally, my favorite thing is to lie all by myself outside in the middle of the night and watch the stars. It makes me feel so small and insignificant, yet I know I'm partially made of those stars. Treat your ego as a lost child, take care of it and love it despite it's insecurities and tantrums. And forget everything I just wrote.

1.25x speed

Could you talk about dating apps and people who likes to show theirselves like having a perfect life? Do that people exist? People with no problems?