‪@kanyewest‬ / @heavywhiphand
Writer unknown. Recorded by anonymous musicians. In 1937, Howard, Fine, and Howard were on a plumbing repair job underneath Grand Central Station when they got lost searching for the repair site. Blunder after blunder would lead these three to discover make shift tunnels under New York’s Central Park. After realizing they left their tools in the van, Moe Howard, in a fit of rage, picked up the closest object to hit his knuckle headed cohorts with, only to find out the object he was using to batter them was a priceless artifact of great jewish cultural significance. It was the oldest known recording of a song passed down for generations. Its still one of the longest running top ten hits of Israel to this day. Enjoy
[Lyrics]
We get Shikered on that liquor
Fuck’n Mazel tov’n
Hit the dance floor like a dreidel
Fuck’n Pop’n Moloch’n
We got A SHAYNA MAIDEL
Yo, We keep it Kabballin
Hollywood’n any woman
casting couches a callin
(L’Chaim Bitch’s)
Everyone’s got a price
and we loan it with interest
Yo’ we maybe circumcised
But our wieners delicious
Yo, I’ll tunnel through those pants
cut a whole in a sheet
feed you commands like a golem
Keep you down on your knees
This is America the Jewtiful
There’s nothing more beautiful
streets of gold and money trees
There’s nowhere more suitable
From sea to shinning sea
We central bank on your pity
If you try to stop us now
We’ll Jericho every city
Mt Rushmore needs bigger noses
We were here first, according to Moses
Ya’ll goyim give us money
Till we make you the brokest
So make it rain like a plague
Gay frogs and locusts
(goyim bitches)
We conquer promised lands
Who else does it better
Even though we’re all kosher
we still gett’n that cheddar
You best believe our propaganda
Cough it up like a rabbi
It holocaust’s an arm and leg
But we’ll be your best ally
This is America the Jewtiful
There’s nothing more beautiful
streets of gold and money trees
There’s nowhere more suitable
From sea to shinning sea
We central bank on your pity
If you try to stop us now
We’ll Jericho every city
We killed Christ by Pilot.
Yo, everyone knows it
Thats the only thing we
Jews will never be owning
We be holler’n like Jericho
Moloch’n your children
We burn’n up these tracks
Like a Gaza civilian
(YAHOOOOO)
Here in Jewmerica,
these christians be dummies
They forgive at every turn,
Until we have all their monies
We’ll rebuild the temple
and keep it out of the news
We’ll tell you who to worship
the real king of the jews
This is America the Jewtiful
There’s nothing more beautiful
streets of gold and money trees
There’s nowhere more suitable
From sea to shinning sea
We central bank on your pity
If you try to stop us now
We’ll Jericho every city
Like the mutant ninja turtles
We tunnel through your towns
We build’n temples for the shekels
Acting so profound
We been whaling at walls
That try to hold us down
We been sailing merchant ships
We been owning the crout’s
(HEEB LIFE)
We’ll circumcise your children
or they’ll burn in the flame
We’ll molest all these women
that are thirsty for fame
Yo its an eye for an eye
and we’re winning this game
In the end whats forgiveness
but a poor mans ways
This is America the Jewtiful
There’s nothing more beautiful
streets of gold and money trees
There’s nowhere more suitable
From sea to shinning sea
We central bank on your pity
If you try to stop us now
We’ll Jericho every city