NTA. He CHOSE to cheat knowing the prenup clause. So technically he CHOSE to lose his financial stability. Womp womp💸

@daniellemitchell3118

16 күн бұрын

Yep. He probably thought she would never find out. Cheaters always do. Smh

@leamisigaro4233

15 күн бұрын

​@@daniellemitchell3118or he probably thought that he could pretty much get her to overlook it.... Or take him back .... And if he was truly sorry, he wouldn't try to get your family and friends involved to make you feel bad to let it go... He thought he could get off Scott free... But can I just say womp womp always gets me no matter how ridiculous it sounds😂😂

He is not sorry he cheated he’s sorry he got caught NTA

@lilogonzales6625

16 күн бұрын

What apologetic? He cheated! What compassion did he have for you when he was danging the other and make her believe she was the one? He signed that paper thinking he could screw you later. Now he's the one in 💩 Had he empathy for you when he signed it thinking it will just protect him?

@winniesundust5709

16 күн бұрын

Exactly 💯

@juliawacker

11 күн бұрын

A one time thing might be a mistake, have an affair ging on for a year is russian roulette.

Nta. He knew what would happen if he cheated and he still did it.

NTA Cheating isn't a mistake, it's a choice.

@annacalifornia6498

17 күн бұрын

Plus a mistake would be. He slept with somebody one time when he was super drunk. But he was having an affair for a whole year. That's not a mistake. That's a willful decision. And of course she's vindictive the love of her life was cheating on her for a whole year.

@sgtwhisker26

16 күн бұрын

@@annacalifornia6498 still counts when you’re drunk same for if you kill somebody

Definitely NTA. Did he really expect her or the judge to overrule the "cheating clause" after he literally cheated on her for over a year? Hell nah, OP should take back what is rightfully hers and start anew. He can find "new financial stability" with his current paychecks and his side piece. I think OP should distance herself from the people telling her to "have compassion" or to "give him a second chance". He's only sorry he got caught. If his side piece hadn't messaged OP, he would have kept on doing it. If OP took her husband back, he most likely would cheat again, whether it's the same person or a new one.

@daniellemitchell3118

16 күн бұрын

All of this.

I can guarantee you he wouldn't bat an eye at using that clause to his benefit if the tables were turned.

Not the AH. Apologetic my arse. He didn't make a mistake he had well over a year affair and got caught. If she hadn't called you he would still be doing so. He knew the clause was there. That's payment for his abuse of your trust, loyalty and marriage. Take every single iota you earned it.

NTA - to any of your friends who think its a one-time thing they need to know the saying. Once a cheater, always a cheater. He sighed a prenup, knowing what happens when you go against that and / or he makes you overlook it. Tell him you can sue him for a breach of contract.

@zoe9190

17 күн бұрын

A one time thing would be a one night stand, he had a relationship with someone else. They are wrong these friends

To the other half of “friends” who thought OP overdid it, at least OP knew whose side they were on. OP is NTA. Mans more sorry that he got caught. Actions have consequences.

He's only apologetic because he got caught and doesn't want to lose the cash....go for the throat....

He was cheating for a year, that wasn't a 1 night stand.

“People make mistakes” uhuh Having a prolonged affair is not a mistake

You both sign the prenup. You both know what is on it. He knew what will happen when he cheated. Now he has to pay up. He is a Cheater. Once a Cheater, Always a Cheater

Cheaters don't deserve pity.

He's sad because he got caught and facing the consequences of his actions and ops "friends" who said she was being to harsh aren't very good friends who probably knew about the affair or cheaters themselves.

He made the prenup?!? Dude if you’re a cheater- don’t put in a condition about cheating!

NTA. This isn't some niche, unexpected interpretation of the contract. This is exactly what the prenup is for: to clarify what the two parties think is fair in this situation. If he didn't think it was fair for one of you to financially suffer from cheating and divorce, he should have said so in the beginning.

NTA. He knew what he was doing

He’s only apologetic because he got found out. He only thinks it’s unfair because it was him cheating. It is a legal contract. He will have received legal advice before signing. He signed. He now has to fulfil his legal obligations. It’s really as simple as that. Actions have consequences and he knew the contents of the pre-nup, probably better than you, as it was to primarily protect his assets. You can be absolutely certain that had it been you at fault all his relatives would be pushing for him to get everything he could and then more.

She cost him big time. That affair is done.😅

should have thought about his MARITAL ASSETS while he screwed someone else for a whole year

Nta he made his bed

@daniellemitchell3118

16 күн бұрын

Literally.

The only reason he’s sorry is because he got caught. Nta

the prenup is a legal document. you both signed it, it seems only one of you - beside the lawyers and judge - read and understood it. the story doesn't mention who suggested and drew up the prenuptial agreement. considering the stated wealth/contribution disparity at the beginning - I would wager it was STBX, or his family

And this is exactly why my bf and I have talked about having this clause in our own prenuptial agreement and will be followed if we ever divorce. He's not willing to lose his money, and I'm smart enough to know that if I cheat, he will leave me as I would him.

You are not the AH. He knew about the clause in the pre- nup and still betrayed you by being unfaithful. Infidelity is a deal breaker and he needs to suffer ALL the consequences of his actions. If his family is so concerned about his financial loss tell them to feel free to make up the losses out of their own pockets.

Why do people defend cheaters, just why? Seriously?

@namelessbrat7197

16 күн бұрын

I suspect the people defending cheaters are cheaters themselves.

If she was the one who cheated he would definitely enforce it so there is no reason to “show compassion”

Crom what it sounds lik he is only sorry for getting caught

The friends who say you are being vengeful and he has apologised and is remorseful are not your friends. He cheated for over a YEAR!!! This was not a drunken mistake that he immediately told you about. This was him telling AP that he loved her wanted to be with her, told her this for a YEAR and the only reason they are not fully together is because YOU wouldnt agree to a divorce!! Hes an AH so take him for everything you can.

@tiffanycole4533

16 күн бұрын

Thought the same dam thing

NTA. Cheating is a Choice, not a Mistake.

He put the clause in the prenup. He knew what the consequences would be if he cheated yet he did it anyway. He should have kept it in his pants and stayed faithful

OP's ex-husband's family saying 'everyone make mistakes' and that 'OP is just trying to screw him' do they not realize the affair was going on for a year? That's not a "mistake" that's a calculated, intentional decision and he knew what the consequences would be. He probably put that in the prenup to save his own skin and wasn't prepared for it to backfire. If the roles were reversed, I doubt he would consider, even momentarily, to not uphold that clause. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.

Cheating isn't a mistake it's a decision

A mistake is a drunken night not a year long affair

Girl, when they ask, tell them you'll use that money to pay for the therapy to get over the heartbreak he cause. It's not fair that he broke it and won't pay to fix it back

Dude needs to pipe down, like bro he clearly read the contract and signed it and knew the consequences that would follow if he did cheat, and anyway this is his comeuppance for treating her like a mug by going behind and cheating and then expecting to be rewarded half the assets for his terrible action , like he should be grateful he his getting anything at all. All this comes down to is that he is sorry he got caught not that he cheated, and if the shoe was on the other foot I bet that in his own words he would be vindictive and demand that the claws was enforced, so definitely NTA

He knew what he was doing, he knew that the cheating clause existed. Play stupid games win stupid prices😂😂😂

He is not sorry he cheated; he is sorry he got caught. That is what the pre-nup was for. He signed it, knowing what it meant. He chose to cheat, and he didn't come clean, you caught him. Don't listen to anyone else. That is exactly what pre-nups are for, your own protection.

If the OP had broken a clause in the prenup, you better know for dang sure her EX would have used it in the divorce. The only reason why anyone is saying no to her is because she's a woman and women are expected to be "nice". Men, nope.

0:59 for people coming from shorts

NTA! I was cheated on by my ex. I’m disabled with an autoimmune disorder; I can’t afford to get an STD. The massive doses of medication could really ravage my body. As it was I got an okay settlement. Taking care of yourself is the most important thing. Just an odd question; who wanted the cheating clause in your prenuptial agreement

He knew it was there and he chose to sign it, he knew about it and chose to cheat, he chose to not get divorced before getting with this other woman, he decided he'd cheat even knowing about the prenup, if it's all forgiven then there was no point having it there in the first place, man destroyed his life and is just looking for someone to blame

Summary: judge ruled prenup was valid. Him or his family doesn’t like it. Friends divided. AYTA? Absolutely not. If prenup benefited him he would use it.

If the shoe was on the other foot, would he give you a break?

The once who side with the husband are the ones who’re most likely or already cheated multiple times 😂

Nta. Dude cheated for a whole year… hardly apologetic during that time so I don’t know why he’s pretending now

I bet that clause was there incase she cheated and it’s now being used against him.

He signed a contract, im fucking certain if she had cheated he and his family would enforce the contract. They would not have the same "people make mistakes, she is being cold hearted" attitude that they have now. And while i personally dont think she is being cild hearted even if she is.... so what? Fuck that cheater he can pay out the ass for being a shitty partner.

NTA. He screwed himself by screwing his coworker.

So the prenup is only justified if she were the one to cheat eh? NTA. Get that money and run, tell his family if they wanna keep harassing you it won’t be hard to take them to court either.

Nta,even if you forgive him,the judge wont cause the prenup is valid. Tell those friends that are saying that you're harsh. Say that thats life,life is unfair but nevertheless is life. That cheater is just reaping what he sowed when he cheated on you.

No absolutely not it's In legal writing so he knew what he was getting into so no absolutely not

It sounds like he forgot what was in the prenup and after she reminded him he realized he's screwed.... NTA btw he cheated if it was the other way around the first thing he would do it bring up the prenup

I honestly hate how but can understand how some people are so empathetic even when the wrong was twords them are you seriously thinking you’re TAH? like NO! He knew that was in the agreement and chose to go against that and shatter your marriage he doesn’t care one bit only cares cause he’s losing his money !

It’s not like if it was the other way around he wouldn’t do the same. And choose to screw the op

Dude ain't apologetic he is just mad that he got caught. Op you need new friends. Where the compassion when your ex was screwing the other woman for a year?

Nah if reversed they would have been cheering him on

Nta. You let everyone know who's against you that. If they had something similar happen to them then they're more than welcome to to roll over and walk away but you're no fool and won't roll over, he knew what would happen if he cheated or I, so I didn't don't call me again. Maybe next time he won't with someone else

Cheating is worse no excuse and it's not a mistake it's on purpose. If the tablets were turned if he would've do it for you, No. So why should you do it for him. He can be the bigger person by not cheating in the first place.

Excuse me a year long affair is not a mistake it is an intentional decision that was made repeatedly for a year. Let the AP enjoy his broke ass.

he cheated for over a year. that’s not a mistake

You are in no way the ahole. Screw him over, like he did to you. And if it were me, i'd go after his girlfriend for compensation for breaking you up.

No

Girl stand up, that man cheated on you for a YEAR. He put your health at risk! He didn’t give a damn about you during that year so why the hell should you care if the contract created to protect you both swings in your favor? You’re the one who was betrayed and hurt, you have no obligated to coddle him, he would not be this nice to you if you were the one who cheated.

NTA

Play stupid games....LOSE.