I told this joke at Thanksgiving and now I'm not allowed to come over for Christmas

@lasergod

Жыл бұрын

I hope you included the “he fucked a frog” line

@GospelBearer

10 ай бұрын

Your family doesn’t deserve you.

@dirtydevil1

10 ай бұрын

I'll have to try that too, then

@The-Armed-Pacifist

9 ай бұрын

Worth it!!

@rayamat01

8 ай бұрын

My family would stop listening about 20 seconds in to the joke

the best part about a norm macdonald joke is you never know if he's already told you the punchline

@bigdiscenergy

27 күн бұрын

It's actually a well known joke. My dad told it long before this was recorded.

@MrPruske

21 күн бұрын

I think it's more of a barrage of punches, and a big finish at the end of the combo

@lollipop84858

19 күн бұрын

Norm McDonald is overrated, and this painful to follow joke is too poorly delivered. I'm leaving before the punchline. Bye

@itsjustJex

19 күн бұрын

​@@lollipop84858 Did you just leave a yelp review on a joke? 💀

@slpguy6026

17 күн бұрын

@@lollipop84858omg go away crabby ass. His delivery is exactly what makes it funny. Note the interviewer losing it. Try some happy meds.

He could've left the joke at, 'He fucked a frog', but, no, Norm the legend goes on to burn the building down.

@FlyGuy2000

8 ай бұрын

Only Norm MacDonald could get away with telling a joke where the punchline is in the middle of the joke.

@MyPronounsISwhom

8 ай бұрын

Lol "... well, anyways I want a loan..."

@ALToussaint7

7 ай бұрын

I stopped listening at Mick Jagger f-ing a frog. Got the punchline (I think) but didn’t want to waste a 2nd minute of my life that I can never get back.

@ChxseOP

7 ай бұрын

@@ALToussaint7so instead you wasted more time in the comments section, like anyone cares what you think

@justintime41776

5 ай бұрын

​@ALToussaint7 jokes are hard man.

"well anyways.. I want a loan.. for a lilly pad" will always kill me lol

@matteframe

9 ай бұрын

I think "my dad is Mick Jagger, he fcuked a frog" is pretty good, too

@Sam-um9nu

8 ай бұрын

so adorable and hilarious at the same time, I love it

@MetalMouse67

Ай бұрын

I lolled so hard I think I woke up my neighbours 😂😂😂

Her name's Patty

@mercenarytao7930

Жыл бұрын

He was so good at distracting the listener from that detail. You hear it but it feels like Norm just wanted to simplify her name moving forward in the story only for it all to come together moments later

@karlan

3 ай бұрын

That’s where I saw where it was heading. I didn’t see the scope, but I saw the direction.

@williamchristie9129

16 күн бұрын

You can say the tellers name is ms whack easily. The hard part is dropping in the patty part in a way that makes sense. Punchline hits less if you dont establish the patty part and it makes no sense if you dont say ms whack. Very difficult. Norms the best

@BenThal8

14 күн бұрын

I died 😂

@user-wj2hn8eq5j

6 күн бұрын

He had my curiosity but then he had my interest

Norm cracking at 1:46 over how ridiculously stupid this punchline is about to be😂

@AustinMulkaMusic

2 ай бұрын

😂

@youtubesucks8995

9 күн бұрын

Or trying to remember to get it right 😄.

If you ever want an excuse to leave a party, tell this joke.

@Lucifronz

3 ай бұрын

You misspelled "if you ever want to get kicked out of a party, tell this joke."

@MattNeufy

24 күн бұрын

Unless your name is Norm Macdonald, in which case everybody shakes their heads and you drink for free all night

@biggusdickus1689

16 күн бұрын

​@@LucifronzAnd what a misspelling! This guy's no blue stocking that's for sure

"....her name is Paddy..." a throwaway remark which is ultra important. Hoping to dance with you on the Streets of Gold someday, Norm.

@rg_888

3 ай бұрын

Are those streets found in Temiscaming, Quebec?

@mike_majora

3 ай бұрын

@@rg_888 nah i believe they're referring to the yellow brick road in The Wizard of Oz

@connorobilly

2 ай бұрын

You sound like a prideful fellow

@bomaveety3408

2 ай бұрын

@@connorobilly By faith I have peace in knowing where I'm going when I die, and I look forward to seeing Norm. That's not pride, it's just knowing that I know that I know.

@connorobilly

2 ай бұрын

@bomaveety3408 by pride, I meant soft in the anal area.

Norm was the kind of comedian who could make you laugh five times at a joke that was only ten words long.

@icankillbugs

8 ай бұрын

Also the kind who could make me laugh 0 times at a joke 5,000 words long...

@martinez8290

7 ай бұрын

@@icankillbugs Indeed, he was BOTH. But even some of his convoluted jokes aren't shabby.

@Lucifronz

3 ай бұрын

@@icankillbugs You not laughing was the joke to him.

@icankillbugs

3 ай бұрын

@@Lucifronz a true Gilbert Gottfried

@johnsonjj117

2 ай бұрын

@@icankillbugsdifferent strokes for different folks. There’s many who think he’s funny and many who don’t. TBH no one really cares that you don’t find him funny.

Adam's "imagine" always gets me

@Setnochima

11 ай бұрын

and his laugh after norm says mick jagger fucked a frog lmao

@stuflu8380

9 ай бұрын

Only with Norm Would I not be surprised if the entire joke was “A frog walks into a bank for a loan”

@dnny1440

9 ай бұрын

For me it's the "he fucked a frog" lmao

@dkurtz786

8 ай бұрын

“It’s just a joke Adam…. You don’t need to chime in!” Haha

@alexethan4480

5 ай бұрын

$25,000 a week he costs. Fckin says “imagine”

Overly elaborate jokes like this are gold, when they are told right

@CometdownCat

8 ай бұрын

Amen brother

@djbeacon6895

8 ай бұрын

Use to call them "shaggy dog" stories. GREAT!!

@richardl772

8 ай бұрын

Yeah……if only.

@kuhnhan

5 ай бұрын

When they are told right is the key.

@rankinlas

2 ай бұрын

I don’t even know if this was told right. But I laughed 🙈

I still think one of the funniest things i've heard norm say is "i try not to preach, but idk how you're going to get into heaven without jesus christ"

@carloselhakim

10 ай бұрын

Also very true

@matteframe

9 ай бұрын

his absurd comedy is the greatest... I mean, who could possibly believe something like that?

@KROGANLovesKittensAndPuppies

8 ай бұрын

The greatest

@0ut1aw

8 ай бұрын

​@@matteframemost of the smartest people to ever live

@KBMB47

8 ай бұрын

Norm believed in Jesus Christ…when a comedian was making fun of religion Norm called him to the rug for it..(when he was a judge on a show.) I’ve also heard him defend Christianity many times. Norms in Heaven. I believe that and if you don’t believe in Jesus you should start talking to him today. I hope you do.❤

We could all tell this joke but it would never sound like this

@JackWilkos

8 ай бұрын

True

@howardmckeown7187

6 ай бұрын

Thank god😩

@keaton718

3 ай бұрын

I didn't even know a dirty version of this joke was even possible.

@Sniperboy5551

Ай бұрын

I dunno, if I got real high, I might be able to sound like Norm

@fosty.

Ай бұрын

I first heard it from a guy while playing Rust. It was just random people in a safe zone telling jokes on a stage. He did it pretty well, I thought he was just making shit up as he went along.

My favorite Norm joke. Man walks into a store. Hi can I have some polish sausage? Guy behind counter says, you must be polish. Man says, just because I order polish sausage doesn’t mean I’m polish. Guy behind counter says. No sir, your in a hardware store.

@jeremiahbullfrog9288

7 ай бұрын

🤣🤣🤣

@masterjbt

6 ай бұрын

I dont get it

@PDXpackrat

5 ай бұрын

Yes that’s a great joke

@jeremiahbullfrog9288

5 ай бұрын

@@PDXpackrat Especially if you read it in Norm's voice

@user-wj2hn8eq5j

5 ай бұрын

​@@masterjbt hey everyone, I found the pol

The somberness of the delivery and the offhandedness of important information to the punchline is what makes this joke amazing.

No matter the punchline, Norm's journey TO it is a.l.w.a.y.s. as good a content as any punchline.

He had me at, "do you want to hear a joke." 🤣

Like the king in India, who lived in a bamboo palace and loved getting elaborate new marble thrones. Each time he got a new one, they carried the old one into the attic. One night, their weight became too much, and they broke through the roof and landed on him, killing him. The moral of the story: people who live in grass houses shouldn't stow thrones.

@alaididnalid7660

3 ай бұрын

​@@Eelis0past glory, you say? Guess I'm safe lol

@iamamaniaint

3 ай бұрын

Hey that's a good one lol!

I told this joke countless times while I was in the Marine Corps, I was administratively separated

@EyebrowsGaming

8 ай бұрын

I'm surprised you weren't court martialled

@smoothoperator149

8 ай бұрын

@@EyebrowsGamingwell they were going to, I had to stand in front of a bored of officers to explain myself. Problem is the bored was spell B O R E D

@curbozerboomer1773

8 ай бұрын

@@smoothoperator149 You were in good company...Jimi Hendrix was also booted out, after serving 13 months of a 3 year enlistment.

@EyebrowsGaming

8 ай бұрын

@@smoothoperator149 nailed it lmao

I had pieced together “knick-knack” and “Patty Wack” and I was working thorough “give the frog a loan” when the punchline dropped. 😄

His old man's a rolling stone!

@nathaninostroza7655

3 ай бұрын

Ladies and gentleman, this man is for the birds.

Norm’s joke is all about the journey, not the destination

@keaton718

3 ай бұрын

Yes, because the punchline isn't actually funny, and he knows it's not funny, and you know he knows it's not funny.

@jvallas

20 күн бұрын

Always

@MagnoliaLSAT

11 күн бұрын

gotta disagree insofar as the punchline here is incredible

I have not laughed so hard and long at a joke in I don't know how many years. Thank you.

@pauliepaul3697

7 ай бұрын

Then your love this 😂 Two girls on the checkout at Tesco, one said “You can always tell the single men from the married ones”. Her friend said, “How do do that”? She said “Watch this”. A guy came to the checkout with 6 mushrooms, 3 rashers of bacon, 1 tomato and a tin of beans. She said, “You’re a single fella aren’t you”? He said, “How do you know that”? She said, “Cos you’re a right ugly c♤♡t”.

@tinkertable1977

5 ай бұрын

Glad you enjoyed it. Humour is such a mystical thing. I barely smiled at that one.

@mh53j

5 ай бұрын

Wasn't so much the joke's punchline,it was the way he was telling the story -- you knew it was going to be something stupid, but you just have to stay to the end anyway.

@PhilKelley

5 ай бұрын

@@mh53j Exactly!

@justintime41776

5 ай бұрын

​@tinkertable1977 so these 2 gay guys are playing this game where they jam stuff up each other's rears and they have to guess what it is. So the first guy jams a broom handle up the other guys rear and he giggles a bit and then screams, broom!!! Yay!!! So the other guy jams a...uh the...the thing you wash the floor with...?

Even though that’s a Rolling Stones joke, the best part is Adam inadvertently quoting John Lennon.

@thisisnotthetimeorplacehow1609

8 ай бұрын

this comment really made me laugh hard! thank you for that! :)

@popjaw1andOnly

3 ай бұрын

Nobody told me there'd be jokes like these....

@IIISOLOIII

2 ай бұрын

when?

@tomhogue1771

2 ай бұрын

​@@IIISOLOIII IMAGINE

He was a huge enrichment to this world! ❤

Thanks Norm! This is up there with used car salesman jokes, in a good way.

That joke’s incredibly elaborate. I don’t think I could tell it properly.

@kuhnhan

5 ай бұрын

You are right, anybody else would ruin it.

@dielaughing73

3 ай бұрын

Lotta moving parts

@johnmoore6853

Ай бұрын

Either can Norm

“When we return, David Spade will be with us.” He even made that sound funny.

@callmeshaggy5166

3 ай бұрын

David Spaaade will be with us

@scarygary-qq1pj

2 ай бұрын

​@@callmeshaggy5166No he won't.

I love how his jokes were either super filthy or super clean, no middle ground. It was either this or Richard Clock 😂

That was the dumbest joke i’ve ever heard but I’m crying because of laughing so hard 😂

I can't believe he didn't react when Norm said, "Mrs Whack, oh, BTW, her first name is Patty." I was laughing my ass off, but I like stupid jokes.

Why did I die laughing at "I want a loan....for a lily pad?" Only Norm could make that hilarious. LOL

His delivery is so great.

That's a fucking great joke.

Adam Egret really has an underrated sense of timing.

"her name is Paddy" that's when I knew.

@munstersestraat

8 ай бұрын

genuine question, as i English is not my motherlanguage: why?

@flowersandwater666

8 ай бұрын

​@@munstersestraat knick knack paddy whack is a kids nursery rhyme Norm is using to make a stupid joke with "paddy whack" has a limited number of appearances in the English language besides that rhyme if any.

@munstersestraat

8 ай бұрын

@@flowersandwater666 so a punch line you see coming a mile away. Sounds like Norm alright 😂

@alaididnalid7660

3 ай бұрын

I'm a big Norm fan, somehow I knew the punchline when he mentioned "shiny pink elephant"

@dielaughing73

3 ай бұрын

​@@munstersestraat yup, like the joke about logic

I'm literally F'n crying! Partly because I miss Norm, but mostly because I'm laughing so hard! If you remove the part about Mick SCHTOOPING a frog, it's a Dad Joke, and anyone who can make a joke like that make people laugh as hard as I did was a COMEDIC GENIUS! Sadly I'm using (Was) past tense! RIP NORM

It somehow gets funnier the more you ponder it.

@MagnoliaLSAT

11 күн бұрын

yeah thats the crazy part

A classic "shaggy dogg" story. Love them!!

I love the 00:57 “you see”? 😂

@ShadyRonin

8 ай бұрын

Lmao… well anyways, I want a loan

That's the kinda joke my elderly neighbor used to tell. Norm and Morris would have liked each other, I'll bet.

I think the best comedians never take themselves too seriously.

Always loved Norms dry humor....R.I.P.

i watched this two weeks ago and came back because it's so amazing. I have thought about the way norm pronounces "collateral" many times.

Only Norm MacDonald could tell that joke and make it funny. If anybody else tried, it would just fall flat.

@rmoz2729

2 ай бұрын

No. This delivery is terrible. I don’t who this bloke is but he sounds half asleep. The best version is Australian cricket commentator Kerry Okeefe. kzread.info/dash/bejne/Z41no7qzitTNYs4.htmlsi=EDOmm1PHd2zn6SnC

This material has the power to break a persons mind

"wearing a name tag as they do" 😂😂😂

Hahaha this was like a pearls before swine set up and punchline. 😂

Such a brilliant joke. He was a true comedic genius.

I worked at Atlanta Athletic Club in 1989. The bartender there told me this joke along with 3 others like it and ,i've told them for years. Love them. Miss Norm : (

That joke was such a a journey and I loved every step. God rest his soul he was a funny man.

That was an awesome old time style joke OMG!!!!!!

After my dad picked up on the punch line of Patty Whack, I tell this joke with the teller named Madeline Black and the frog using a tic tac as collateral

He was the master at telling bad jokes but he made them hilarious.

I have been searching for this joke. 😆 my uncle told me this joke many years ago!

That was so stupid that it was brilliant 😂😂😂The delivery is God level😂😂

It's just brilliant the way he tells it. It's all about the delivery The way he just seemingly adds these details like he's making it up on the spot but then at the very end you realize that all those little details were so essential to making the joke work.

The hidden joke is the fact the joke sucks really bad but he’s so giddy that it makes it good. I love this guy. My favorite joke of all time is the “Men vs Women Drivers”. You will not be disappointed. Unless you’re a woman. At that point, no one cares.

You can't help but love the guy

Irishman goes to his doctor, with a frog growing out of his ear. Doc asked 'How longs it been like?' Frog replies 'I woke up this morning and there he was!' 🐸

Oh man, his delivery is just the best.

My friend Lou Wilson told us this joke 30 years ago in Moab. Still funny

Uno de los mejores chista agunaves construido. Gracias Normy.

I’m so mad he never got to be a grandfather. He would have had an arsenal of jokes and stories for his grandchildren.

I needed a good laugh this morning that just hit the spot exclamation point

@scarygary-qq1pj

2 ай бұрын

No it didn't.

So Good ! Like a Joke Andrew Dice clay would tell 🤣🤣🤣🤣

How do you top that😂😂😂😂 Norm. A genius.

There is nothing funny about this joke. . . . . . . . . . . . . except for the fact that Norm is telling it. Like all his other off kilter jokes. Most of them would normally bomb if not told my Norm.

@josephmedeiros71

8 ай бұрын

Thanks for fagsplaining that to us.

One of the greatest jokes of all time.

Norm’s delivery was always spot on.

Norms prospector joke is my favorite but this one is up there.

This joke has everything.

Norm was a deeply closeted cancer patient.

@livewire2759

8 ай бұрын

I didn't even know he was sick...

@curbozerboomer1773

8 ай бұрын

@@livewire2759 It is strange really, that even when he was in his final year, he did not appear to be ill, although he did gain a lot of weight...Most folks become very gaunt at that point. I assume that he crashed very hard, in his final few months. We lost an amazingly funny, and good, man.

@alaididnalid7660

3 ай бұрын

​​@@curbozerboomer1773At some point shit can hit the fan in ways that aren't necessarily predictable to doctors. According to some fan documentary it started spreading and he also caught some kind of infection as he was battling that, so that's when things started to escalate. That's...how I remember it from the doc anyway.

This joke is equivalent to how I passed calculus in high school. I knew the answer before I could back up my work and I had no idea how or why. Norm is the exceptionally bright student who tells the teacher and students how he came to the answer and only he can explain it perfectly and somehow take it to the next level. Edited: Apparently Norm was doing calculus in school by age 10. Of course he was ❤

I learned this joke as a child and it's been a favorite ever since.

I’ve heard this joke at least 10,000 times and it’s never made me laugh as hard as it did here 😂😂

😂😂😂😂 that was so sh#@ still made me laugh

I love this joke, and have told it sooooooooo many times. 😂🤪🤣👍 A bit condensed and tightened up, 😳 I didn’t realize he wrote it🤦‍♂️, thanks for the laughs Norm RIP. 💯💎💚💚💚💚💚💚

The joke is not that bad but the delivery is everything for me.

The cutest joke ever 🤣🤣🤣

I love Norm,RIP buddy

R.I.P. Norm. Thanks! 🎻✌️🙂😎

I used to think Norm was boring, but then as I got older and paid more attention I realized what a Genious he was.

Norm had the best dad jokes.

Excellent setup for a delivery. Also somehow having The Rolling Stones involved is pretty outlandish, which was his aim from the start

Priceless 😂

I knew when I heard the first name of teller. lol classic

I love how he almost cracks just before the punchline. He really made a career out of making himself last. And I love him for it

my favourite joke

don't matter the material Norm is a legend and makes ANYTHING funny. True comedic genius.

LOL. He was classic no matter what his punchlines were.

Norm forgot one important part of the joke: the frog is an old friend of the bank manager. That's how he knows that "his father was a Rolling Stone". Happens to the best of 'em.

@johnandrews2768

3 ай бұрын

He made sure to put in that Patty told him "Kermit Jagger's out there"

When he said her name was Patty I think we could sort of see what was coming next lol!😂

If I laughed out loud at this joke (and I DID lol) then, I consider it a form of entrapment! ;) Only Norm!

It's not what he says so much as it is the way he says it. 🤣

What an odyssey this man took us on

I learned a lot about the bank loan process from this joke. Just a comment, really.

This joke felt like he was making it up as he was telling it😂

One of the few comedians who gets more laughs during the delivery than the punchline itself😁

You can never ever re tell a good Norm joke 😂 he is one in a trillion