Link to my best resources: linktr.ee/narcabusecoach

@jillstruthers

4 ай бұрын

Thank you. This is so refreshing to know! WHEW!

@tinapeters5299

3 ай бұрын

Hi, I am so thankful for this help . I am in totally distress living with this narcissist, even aging and more demanding he does not slow down. Inset strict boundaries already but just being with him sucks the live out of me. He did so many cruel and devastating and humiliating things to me like even moving his favourite prostitute into our house to live with with us about 6 years ago which was the most humiliating experience in my life and when he did that he did even demanded to take care of her and cook for her…..my case is so complicated as I came from a different country ,! And after he convinced me that that is the way how it works in his country now my downfall started and I got to my lowest point in my life. But I am now on my way to recovery still with the narcissist but took his power away as I decided to stand up for myself and learn and learn and learn.!I had and still have no chance to leave He is an aging narcissist now and not getting even better. Thanks for that video. I am alone in a foreign country and i am determined to gets through this. I have no friends with I can talk about these things, whenever I tried I got the message that I am the problem in the relationship and I should just accept him who he is….. It destroyed my health, my social contacts , even my hobbies I used to like to do. I Am grated and thankful for every advice I can get as long as it is according to my personal situation. Thanks again, I will never give up on me, although the narcissist says that I am dumb and garbage , I know who I am. So that’s a good start I think

@thefreckledafrikan

2 ай бұрын

@@tinapeters5299the community of us who have experienced and are now knowledgeable and well educated about narcissistic abuse are here for you ❤

@randyslabach8681

2 ай бұрын

My narcissistic friend, if you can call him that actually goes by the nickname Dishy. He prides himself on the able to tell people off and tell him exactly how it is. I want to tell him another name for Dishy is just rude, but it was start some kind of chaos if I did.

@michelledouglas-thierry3143

2 ай бұрын

I thank God for you for educating us 😢😢

Sign number 1: you are watching this video. ❤

@doloresmikolajewski7640

4 ай бұрын

❤❤❤

@hennaa.elegance

4 ай бұрын

😂

@MegaTblaze

4 ай бұрын

😅

@targetedbythepsychworld

4 ай бұрын

That's not always the case.

@cynthiaherrera4633

4 ай бұрын

That is a lie, narcissists use to learn how empathics moving to do their abuse more efective.

5 signs someone is not a narc: 1) They question whether they are a narc, something a real narc would never do. 2) They have love, empathy, kindness and compassion - virtues a narc knows they don't truly have, but pretend to. 3) They end up going to therapy to fix problems created by the narc. A narc would never go to therapy when they are the crazy ones making everyone else go crazy. 4) They don't leave people out in the cold - a narc can and will do that over and over again without remorse. 5) They are not con artists. All narcs are con artists and vice-versa.

@ekdaufin1485

4 ай бұрын

Especially LOVE the first one as that is all I knew before I saw this video. Now I have even MORE validation! 🎉❤

@raydurka

4 ай бұрын

Well said!

@hannahward4703

4 ай бұрын

Ohhh narcs go to therapy. If they think it will prove a point or if they can use it as leverage

@hannahward4703

4 ай бұрын

Omg I did think I was hovering! Pouring my heart out…holy crap….

@sjplus36

4 ай бұрын

​@@hannahward4703 Yes! If it adds to their projected image of what a wonderful person they are and that they are the victim they will, to manipulate others!

Narcissist will break your self confidence and make you codependent.

@HoneyBadger80886

3 ай бұрын

Exploitive. Guard yourse.

@elfinshell4758

3 ай бұрын

And sometimes after making you codependent, they get bored and just throw you away to fend for yourself with no support system left in your life, because they destroyed that too.

@ericahoward1059

3 ай бұрын

So true

@HoneyBadger80886

3 ай бұрын

@@elfinshell4758 word. I'm channeling Tina Turner...and thriving bound

@tj9023

3 ай бұрын

The way how they use is compliance testing, cold fight, Cliff break up because of the small fight, narcissist rage to let you shut up, play the victom etc. then you will gradually lose hope to agasint them, like learned helplessness

In the end you just feel stupid for ignoring all of the red flags, or loving them despite what they have done.

@kimberlyspeaight7440

4 ай бұрын

So true.

@1979Nicole

4 ай бұрын

The shame that I stayed so long like that’s all I deserved…still not over the trauma. 😢

@tarlankasra

4 ай бұрын

“loving”

@Healthevoid

3 ай бұрын

This is where I am .

@classicleslie6914

3 ай бұрын

I can't even call myself stupid because this is a parent which I have no control being born into.

I hate that they accuse you of their own filth!

@piagard8097

2 ай бұрын

Yes they do!! THEY ARE so fucking evil!! 😢

@francisfischer7620

Ай бұрын

Quite so.

I had almost started to believe that I'm the narcissist. Thank you

@renee8813

4 ай бұрын

@@denisequinn9015🙏💛

@mr.vargas5648

4 ай бұрын

Yeah that's actually waht they do they make you feel like the worst person that ever existed.

@m.f.richardson1602

4 ай бұрын

Me too

@cozy46

4 ай бұрын

Same here

@elizabethbowie9753

4 ай бұрын

​@@mr.vargas5648It's called, "shifting the blame," They do all the crapolla, then make it look like You did it, or You're to blame.... 🙄 Don't fall for their Nonsense!!! 💗

One sign is if you apologize. Narcissists never apologize.

@Trapanzano100

3 ай бұрын

No. My ex-wife cheated on me, but she never apologised or even sounded sorry. What did you expect? I have to satisfy my needs ...

@bluetulisia3

3 ай бұрын

My mom never apologized. She's gone now. I'm healing. She apologized after she died. I heard her audibly. I'm at peace.

@abhishek1421

3 ай бұрын

They don't accept they have done sth wrong

@jasonlow6943

3 ай бұрын

They love non apologies though... I'm sorry but (insert how it's actually your fault here)...

@Trapanzano100

3 ай бұрын

@@jasonlow6943 What i have to insert?

They do the cruelest things to you. You finally react. You feel guilty. Then you realize I'm human. Think. Still, you never said or did the things they would do. Why? You're a decent human with boundaries!

@hectorignacio-nx1dm

3 ай бұрын

They can justify robbing and poisoning your environment then laughing at you behind your back that they get away with it.

@Neokleb

3 ай бұрын

In some cases I think they deserve a prison sentence. it's so twisted.

@biggwillbeats4384

2 ай бұрын

They keep 🫵🏾 on edge, on a scale of 1-10 they keep you at around 8-9..{poking and prodding] {NARC SUPPLY}then trigger 🫵🏾, to ‘play victims’ when you react to ‘being poked at prodded at’ and SPAZZ TF out🤦🏾‍♂️🙆🏾‍♂️, may record or video for their smear of 🫵🏾 campaign…or around others, see he /she ‘victimized me’. 😩😡

@bernadetteodoherty8892

2 ай бұрын

So much information here' can remember in desperation mimicking their behaviour in order to get through to him what it was like, he didn't like it and when I explained my strategy he was indignant and said "that's a load of bo@**x" which left me frustrated and caged. The silent treatment was dreadful and yes remember using it to protect myself.,which again he was not happy about. Thank God I'm out of it 15 years, took ages to recover and I'm still healing, but it's great. It's not easy, I wouldn't recommend the process but I'd recommend the outcome. Probably the best way is acknowledgement of the grief for the unmet needs and eventual gratitude for not being in that situation any more

@user-tz8il9cb4o

2 ай бұрын

Thank you 🙏🏼😊

I think the main difference when the victim does similar things to the narcissist is that their actions are defensive while when the narcissist does them, they do it in a predatory way and taking the initiative to turn the relationship toxic and dangerous.

@nialeilakande

4 ай бұрын

Exactly

@elizabethbowie9753

4 ай бұрын

100 million % correct !!! 👍

@chrystalbonelle1009

4 ай бұрын

100% true.

@forumkitty

3 ай бұрын

This! A narcissist isn't going to defend themselves like this. They will find a way that doesn't make them look weak.

@user-mr8cj3eq7v

2 ай бұрын

This is what happened to me! The Narcissist wanted to make me crazy.They will not stop until you land up in hospital 🏥 or they want you to die! They are the crazy ones, I left and I'm getting a divorce.I'm also seeing a Psychologist.

If you go out of your way to avoid hurting anyone even when they have hurt or harmed you, you're not a narcissist. If you genuinely care about people, you're not a narcissist. If you pray for people including your enemies to be healthy and happy even if it's not with you or despite what they have done to you , you're not a narcissist.

@nbkfvnj

Ай бұрын

It's me. I pray for her well being and her quick recovery. I also feel bad for leaving that house when she was unwell having back pain. I always think that she must b feeling lonely now, how will she manage living alone as she is Lil introvert type. How will she go out for a walk alone or to buy groceries or on a trip as she always needed me for all that. I also think about my father in law as he loves me and he is old. How will he feel if he gets to know that m not living with her.

They really make u believe that you are the only cause for any bad happenings in their life.

@mr.vargas5648

4 ай бұрын

Yes and if you dare call them out for their bad behaviour they start acting like some drama queen.

@lizh1988

4 ай бұрын

Yes, then you finally realize that calling them out is a waste of time. I found out the hard way. They want to lie about you and insult you, because they think it's the truth. But tell them the truth and they think it's an insult or lie.

@mr.vargas5648

4 ай бұрын

@@lizh1988 Its their lack of emphaty that makes them like that.

@lizh1988

4 ай бұрын

@@mr.vargas5648 ✔️

@Thor13332

3 ай бұрын

I got blamed for EVERYTHING. No responsibility whatsoever.

I think questioning if you are a narcissist automatically means you are not- narcs never question their behavior. Danish, you have helped me heal so much! I can’t thank you enough❣️🙏🏻

@shel9008

3 ай бұрын

Oh no. My ex would take Facebook quizzes and post the results to prove she wasn’t one

@pascoe3279

3 ай бұрын

People that deny being one.. odds on 666 your the devil.

@neowolf09

3 ай бұрын

What about the coverts?

@real_hello_kitty

3 ай бұрын

megan I don't think so. If you are questioning if you are a narcissist, that means you somewhere in between narc and non narc (toxic victim). Many empaths are actually toxic . A non narcissist like me, knows for sure I am not a narcissist, because I know right vs wrong, I know my moral values. If you know God & if you know you are in the right, then you know you are not a narcissist.

@megandavis324

3 ай бұрын

@@real_hello_kitty Narcs always think they are in the right.

Sign 6: you seek out information on narcissism to try to find ways to improve yourself, because, dang it, you did all sort of dumb things after escaping that household, and people would be perfectly right to call you a narc! Thank you for a very very welcome presentation. I'll keep trying to improve myself.

@ryanthoms

3 ай бұрын

Yuuup, had a potentially narcissistic roommate that had me genuinely thinking it was my fault and that I was being narcissistic so I’ve been researching narcissists for months. Thank goodness I’ve finally convinced myself I’m not but for awhile I was so convinced I was like “nah you gotta be narcissistic bc you keep denying that you are and that seems narcissistic” 😂 fuckin hell

Part of what the narcissist wants is for you to become toxic like they are. Part of the way you can fight back is to not allow yourself to become that way.

@chrisantoniou4366

4 ай бұрын

True! They consider someone who becomes like them as a validation of their own actions.

@Babu-kr3cr

4 ай бұрын

@@chrisantoniou4366 They also know that your strength is in your purity.

@susanmercurio1060

3 ай бұрын

Easier said than done

@real_hello_kitty

3 ай бұрын

Because they don't want to go to Heaven, but they don't want to be alone in Hell, so they invite you to go with them.

@Babu-kr3cr

3 ай бұрын

@@real_hello_kitty Misery loves company, so they say.

I really felt that when you spoke about LONG PARAGRAPH's. That is one thing I am MOST ashamed about. I live with very few regrets, but I do regret and am embarrassed by the countless LONG letters, emails, and messages I have sent trying to explain my position to an overt narcissist. There have been many. Both narcissists and paragraphs. So many wasted words that should never have been labored over. So thank you for validating that this happens to other survivors as well. The reactive abuse #2 as well. So many times of yelling and screaming, trying to get a point across to no avail. Now I am in a perfectly healthy relationship and I don't think I've ever had to raise my voice in over 7 years. So it is what the narcissist brings out in you.

@Healthevoid

3 ай бұрын

Omg yes!! I wish I would have not tried as hard . It didn't make a difference and only gave him more fuel to gaslight, blame and belittle me .

@patormsby9441

3 ай бұрын

Me too.

@m.s.biteth1164

3 ай бұрын

Same.

@shovanabajracharya

3 ай бұрын

Yes, long paragraphs might've been futile. But at least you got your peace of mind or closure or got it out at least.

@cathyfitzpatrick9384

3 ай бұрын

Thank you for speaking out....Blessings and peace. Be kind to your self start to enjoy your journey of life...

She always used to tell me: "it has nothing to do with me, if that anger and rage wasn't inside you, you wouldn't have acted this way" , which always got me more pissed, but over time it starts fucking with your sanity and you start questioning all your motives

@user-dc3ww7yz2x

2 ай бұрын

How does one come back to clarity? In your experience.

@The_Absent_MindsetReality

2 ай бұрын

@@user-dc3ww7yz2xsame thing happened to me. You have to “purge” them from your memories, your emotions and your thought patterns they installed in you via their abuse. It can take time to do so. So it’s best to work on yourself, forgive yourself for falling for them, (there are so many different kinds of narcissist. Each one of them have different ways of tricking people into their BS.) You have to realize, you are not the only one who has had to endure a narcissist. Makes it easier to let go of how they eff’d with you. So don’t rush into another relationship until you get them out of your system. You don’t need someone to heal you, that you hope can love you… You need to heal yourself, once you have done so, work on yourself, date yourself, and treat yourself. Work on your goals, and you’ll see eventually that you start attracting different types of people who aren’t narcissist. Then you’ll find somebody that can appreciate and respect you, and vice versa. It is going to take time, discipline,& patience. Take time to rest and relax, work out at the gym, find new cuisines to experiment with, to enjoy, take time to read on some books on psychology, Human Behavior, how to be observant of peoples physical behaviors, etc. Knowledge is the best thing you can do to assure yourself, in those times where you have doubt, so when you hear that little voice inside your head that “used” to be them, mocking you and verbally and emotionally abusing you, you can tell that voice to go eff itself. Do not go back to them. Do not be friends with them. Do not share Netflix accounts with them…basically do not share anything with them and disappear. Any friends or social media, you’re going to have to make a change, delete account, unfriend some real friends. Don’t forget that narcissist will also play their friends like fools/chess pieces, friends do not notice that they are narcissist, because the narcissist wants to make sure that they always look like they’re a good person, and they know how to pretend, so you have to cut ties and every where you established something together. Don’t hate yourself, don’t belittle yourself, don’t talk down to yourself or think negative things about yourself. That was something they were doing, something that you do not have to continue doing to yourself even after you rid yourself of them. And that’s what I meant earlier when I said you have to purge them from yourself. Hope that helped.

@pixiehownot1287

2 ай бұрын

Omgosh I'm going through this now ... I'm doubting myself all the time .... I don't know wat is right or wrong anymore.... I feel Soooo confused... So I feel for u... It's hard xoox

This was me 5 years ago. You are not alone if you are watching this, reading this. You are human and you are a survivor ❤

Your video's make me feel less guilty and less lonely in the journey. Thankyou 😊

@ricvanwinkle1665

15 күн бұрын

Me too as I’ve been sexless for over 18 years as that how she punished me or most likely was having an affair. I stayed for 6 reasons as that’s how many kids we had, but they’re all adults and I’m running for the hills

The narc is feeding off of you and they need you more than you know. Their literally feeding of off your energy guys😩

@Amatullah7007

3 ай бұрын

They are energy vampires Shaykh nurjan on youtube speaks about this. They are nefarious beings, autho bilahi Mina shayton neerajim

@brendawallace6571

3 ай бұрын

For this very reason , I call them energy vampires !

@georgettethomas2540

2 ай бұрын

Facts

@ogutirrz

Ай бұрын

💯 I always felt so drained and exhausted in the relationship. I had to be absolutely everything for him, and I felt more like his mother than a partner, smh.

“Narcissists cheat regardless.” 😂😂😂😂

@aralsea1

3 ай бұрын

If someone is in a sexless relationship and then have an affair doesn't mean they are a narcissist.

@Trapanzano100

2 ай бұрын

@@aralsea1 you have always choice. To get out from the marriage

My intention with no contact, is to protect myself. I don't want anything, to do with that person or those hurtful people anymore

@amyj.4992

4 ай бұрын

Speaking my truth, is acknowledging my own unique reality

@amyj.4992

4 ай бұрын

They keep telling people, I ghosted them when they discarded me abruptly

@amyj.4992

4 ай бұрын

Confirmation to no. 4

@amyj.4992

4 ай бұрын

No. 5, confirmation but it was a friendship 💖 not a relationship yet, until after the relationship was over with the previous person. We respected boundaries and he uplifted me in the most loving and healthy ways before the narcissist tried to taint my name with that valuable friend 💐

@proudamerican2133

2 ай бұрын

I hear ya!

Oh my god, screaming and shouting is so me. I feel constantly pushed to a corner and started this behaviour - I always feel so miserable and bad even in the moment I do it! More after it! I always question myself, why couldn't I just stop it or shut up! Basically I love peace and that is not aligning! I was always confused!

@sandybayley4461

2 ай бұрын

Me too

I resonate 💯 with the “disappearing” of the victim, making you feel you don’t matter- but demanding you do all this fecking work for them! Personal and professional experience with these evil crazy people!

@elizabethbowie9753

4 ай бұрын

Exactly, 100 million %. Been there. Through that. 🙄🙄🙄

So true. One of the sadest things about dealing with a narc is that you lose yourself and act out of characters as their behaviour shakes you to the very core. They try to guilt trip you and make you feel like the villain when they do something bad. It gets old pretty quick. Being who they are is the worst punishment ever, we don't need to waste any more time on them. Good riddance.

This is a critical healing primer for those victims who question themselves or are accused of being a narc by their perpetrator. This definitively clarifies that we are NOT the problem; we're only safeguarding ourselves. Thank u again, Danish! ❤

@joseenoel8093

4 ай бұрын

By their "Predator" also... 👍😘!

@scarlettnewman1115

4 ай бұрын

Yes 💯 Amen

@Iselindea13

3 ай бұрын

In the End of everything I decided to really Walk away and never look back. When he blamed me, for to be everything that he ever was... in the view of all the red flags I didn't want to look at. But in that very moment, I knew exactly what he was. He was never gonna see me again. I turned my back and without a word dissapeared from his entire World. - Stay Strong Everyone.. ❤

My narc treated me so badly. I lost my self-esteem at first. You learn to argue and trick just like the narcissist. You would never stoop to their level.

Narcissists, gaslight, cheat, steal abuse, etc. etc. that’s the difference if you don’t do these things you’re not a narcissist even though you may have a big ego

After surviving a marriage to a narcissist and going to therapy I asked my therapist, “am I a narcissist? Do I have narcissistic traits?” She replied, “the fact that you’re asking this should be your answer.”

“You are not a n. when you are acting in a biologically correct way to their narcissistic abuse.!!! ❤❤❤❤Thank you !

Is anyone else done with figuring out what makes these demons tick? I must be healed because I dont give a sh!t anymore of whats broken in them, in me that caused this dynamic. All I can focus on is what keeps me happy, healthy and functioning. I dont give a f*ck what their latest plan or drama is-I have a life and theyre not allowed in it. End of their story, fresh start of mine! Thanks Danish for helping me to get here!

@elfinshell4758

3 ай бұрын

I’m still trying to build my life away from them, but I’m mostly done trying to understand the motives behind their actions. My dad spent 40 years trying to understand why my mom did the things that she did, and he couldn’t figure it out entirely. All he wanted was a peaceful life, to enjoy his time with his kids and with her, and she wouldn’t let him have that peace. If he couldn’t understand her motives after putting in all that time and energy trying to work with her and help her, I’ve got no chance and I’m better off just getting the hell away from her. Especially now that my dad has passed on, I’m the main target that she’s trying to make things miserable for and break me down even further. All while blaming me for being broken. I don’t have the energy or the will to deal with it anymore, and whatever relationship we may have had isn’t worth losing my peace. I’m looking forward to healing further and finding myself again, because most of myself has been lost for a long time and I’ve been living as a shell of who I once was. I want to be my whole self again.

@natthebratster

3 ай бұрын

@@elfinshell4758 It's super hard, and you're going to feel guilty as Hell for awhile because it sounds like she's older. You MUST go No Contact. Take away all of the history, particulars and it's down to your life or hers. The Narcissist forces us to make this decision and they don't care if they literally kill you in order to have control. You have to accept this and move on away from her so you can start living or you'll always be trapped. Good luck to you!!

@georgettethomas2540

2 ай бұрын

Me too I just don’t care anymore

@natthebratster

2 ай бұрын

@@elfinshell4758 good luck and we'll wishes to you. We've been through Hell and now that we know it, have gotten out of it, we can move forward and start living. It's not easy but at least it's our life now-not their's to toy with.

Narcissists are teenagers, I'm not a teenager. I may act like one once in a while, but I'm not perpetually stuck like that; confused about who I am, obsessed with material things, socially idiotic, delusional, defly ignorant of any ounce of responsibility.

@ivadedeva7005

4 ай бұрын

They are not teenagers! THEY ARE EVIL!

@titaniumcranium3755

Ай бұрын

Scary thing is that describes exactly how my nobody brother is. He is 23 and still acts like that in every sense of the word and what do ya know, he's even been trying to hit on minors. Exactly why I moved from family, nobody wants to put up with grown adults who refuse to take accountability and accept responsibility.

I lived with a Narcissist for 3 years, competely threw my perception of relationships, and now 10 years later im still single and struggle with meeting new people. Trust is the hardest thing, as my guard is always up. Really pleased to find this channel, and find there is a whole network of support to help with this. Im getting there, :) I was thinking it was me for a while, but once i realised what was going on i just left immediately. Took a number of goes, as they became nice etc, cycle, and i gave them another try., Big mistake,.., Im now happy, and moving on..........

@ricvanwinkle1665

15 күн бұрын

Married 35 years to a narcissist and I have the same issues of trusting anyone as she on paper looks like the perfect wife, till you see the true her 😂😂😂😂

This video made me cry. And it also made me feel unlovable, because no one tried to save me (in fact, instead, people laughed at me and made fun of me, which is the opposite of being compassionate). I still feel like I deserved all of this.

@2_blAck

4 ай бұрын

Same😔 A lot to think about

@anonimous7099

4 ай бұрын

I know how you feel. In still alone after all the abuse I suffered. Non of my family or former friends invited me at Christmas or came to visit me at my birthday. My own parents and brothers do not even know where I live. I got a lot of kindness from new people I met.

@ShY_6593

4 ай бұрын

Guys!! Remember, you CANNOT control their emotions. After I realized this, my pleasing nature changed towards him. I stopped worrying if what I was doing would upset him because I knew I was doing nothing wrong. He'd try to make me feel bad constantly. Then, I started gray rocking and now he's struggling not getting constant praise. I am not accepting terrible behavior, putting me down, pushing me, breaking stuff and name calling anymore.

@leanne123

4 ай бұрын

​@@anonimous7099 Yes it is so ironic that strangers are kinder to you than your family. It is really mind blowing and people always find it almost impossible to believe your family is so horrible to you. It is incredibly painful that you want to deny it yourself.

@aliendeathrocker

3 ай бұрын

You didn't deserve what happened to you and you aren't unlovable. The way you were treated by those who should have shown care and compassion and supported you was wrong and says more about them than it does about you. There will be people who will love you and support you and who won't laugh at your pain or blame or shame you for bad things that have happened to you. They *are* out there and you *do* deserve love, support , empathy and compassion, even if you may not have found it yet. Please don't give up or blame yourself, you were never at fault for any of the abusive treatment others have given you.

I have always worried that I was the narcissist but hearing you Danish, I know for sure now that I was not. Thank you for validating me.

@elizabethbowie9753

4 ай бұрын

CLARIFY, is the word that came to my mind!!! This video Clarifies that we're Not the narcs.

Yes you get fed up pushing your buttons and torturing you you get angry, it changes you

I have been holding myself accountable for things that make no sense nor am I responsible for.

Thank you! I cheated on the narcissist boyfriend of 10 years to show myself that I at least had control of my body. But I knew that it was wrong and I carried a lot of guilt.

@RoseQuartzGemini

4 ай бұрын

Big hugs. I definitely relate to that.

@nialeilakande

4 ай бұрын

I can relate to that too but it was less than a year but thank God I left him

@Baistegenx

4 ай бұрын

You could have just left

@CherrysJubileeJoyfully

4 ай бұрын

@getincarihavecandy I tried, but he stopped me. It's not always that easy. He intentionally trapped and isolated me. That's what they do.

@jacquelinecherry9914

4 ай бұрын

@CherrysJubileeJoyfully I too also resorted to this as a last ditch effort to regain any sense of who i was, i think at that point i was hoping he would just finally take my life or leave indefinitely with no reason to return, i was desperate and searching for any loop out but the guilt I hold on too is immeasurable, i feel you, your are not alone and I hope you heal from your trauma ❤

I've been pushed, Till I scream, At the beginning I'd freeze couldn't fight back .

Narcissist, flee from conversations, fights, do you know why? This is a common trait. You will stand your ground they will not.

I wish I could like this video 20 times lol. My negative behavior has definitely been a response to the toxicity I've experienced.

Not to hurt them but to SAVE YOURSELF BC you know they are not able and or ready to really love- too much work! 😊

after decades of this horror...I learned to walk away the minute someone attacks me...or even if they attack someone else....I choose to not live with or in a situation that has hate/anger/fear. My world and what I want is Love...if it has to be alone so be it.

@patormsby9441

3 ай бұрын

Reading through Lobaczewski's "Political Ponerology" gave me my first clue, about a decade ago. He said psychiatrists dealing with psychopaths in the USSR reported an urge to "gargle with something strong" after talking to them. I came to recognize a concerted search for the remote control button on me--provoking guilt--as the most important clue. I distance myself after that. It doesn't catch all of them, but it catches the ones that matter: the ones that want to use you.

@lynnessawiseman6675

3 ай бұрын

I couldn't have worded tht better 💯💯💯

I hate to think that the narcs 'won' by bringing me down to their level...making me look like the crazy one, when really they are. It's a lot worse when they have evidence of you reacting. In my case, it went viral in my neighborhood and now I'm being targeted by all the narcs who know where I live and work. Since everyone thinks I'm the problem, they know they can get away with their bad behavior and no one would believe me. Recently, I started recording these people...word is spreading and several of them are scared of being exposed and are on their best behavior....but who knows how long that will last, probably not for long. In fact, they are likely going to use that against me too...another reason why I'm crazy or should be avoided.

@raydurka

4 ай бұрын

Crazy times we're living in! Hang in there!

@debsterdeb

3 ай бұрын

Damn. I hope you are seeing an amazing counselor. I’m a survivor of 23 years of abuse. Sending hugs.

@koolkat6841

2 ай бұрын

Love and hugs to you.

Thank you for this Danish. Yes, yes and yes! I can tick all the boxes! I left the narcissist after 33 years, and some people asked me why I stayed so long. Like most survivors, I had a million reasons to stay, and a million reasons to go. I am 8 years away from the narcissist, and almost two years blissfully married to the man I was to be engaged to back in 1977. We found each other again after 39 years apart, and he didn't marry anyone else. Back in 1977 his last words to me were, "I will always wait for you"...he did! He has been with me through the darkest of days, and helped me find myself again. He is funny, strong, affectionate, compassionate, empathetic, romantic, a great listener, my best friend, lover, confidante, and soul mate. It has been an extremely difficult, painful, and exhausting journey back to me, and to freedom, but all of that is in my rear view mirror now, as I move on, with my foot on the accelerator. 🤗❤🏃‍♀️💨🏃‍♀️💨

@vincentubaldino6695

3 ай бұрын

I am so glad your are happy and loved now. Praise your time again. Bravo

Sign number 1: you clicked on this video.

I have never heard anyone address #5 at all and I'm so glad that you did. The qualities we look for in a relationship disappear because they were never there to begin with. After years of abuse and neglect we're thirsty for the love and respect we deserve. Morally, it's not the right thing to do but realistically, it just might save our sanity. Thank you for your professional information and your down to earth opinions. It's what sets you apart from the rest.

This video found me at the right time. Thank you Danish. May God Bless you

I felt like a narcissist for the simple crime of wanting a day to celebrate my marriage. But I learned that narcissists can't handle it when someone else is receiving praise or recognition. My brother screamed at me on the dance floor at my wedding in front of everyone. I cut him out of my life. My mom kept telling me it was my fault for making him my best man and wanted me to apologize to him. Total lunacy. I cut her out of my life too. I'm much happier after a lifetime of my brother being put on a pedestal, and being held to insane standards.

They leave u when u need them most. They block u then add u again and when u speak ur truth then block them they will show up at your door and cry. They talk the most shit too

@Amatullah7007

3 ай бұрын

Shaykh nurjan on youtube They aren't humans.... it's so painful

2.56 relatable..the long paragraphs 😢n the shame afterwards to have been so desperate..the betrayal when the long paragraphs were ignored n ridiculed instead of being heard

@sandramcinnesscott2931

4 ай бұрын

same...he admitted he didn't read them 'too many words'

Thank you for this video. Narcissists cause so much chaos that they can make you feel like u are the crazy one. The way you explained these 5 signs gave me a lot of relief.

Finally a video that explained my exact situation. I did everything she wanted but never got communication, empathy or any type of physical passion. Everything was on her time. I felt so emasculated when she kicked me out of the house we had just bought. Now I'm on my way to bigger and better things.

Thank you for talking about sign #5 . You are the first I ever heard talking about this! I 💯 agree to do your best to get out of the narcissistic relationship before getting into a new one. I’m so glad you acknowledge that the stepping out by the non-narcissistic partner is something forgive-able. Those of us who didn’t stay faithful to a toxic partner are not entirely to blame for this, and deserve to have a loving relationship with someone healthy!

"It was trying to unalive you" I love this Guy.

Thank you for setting me free today. God has indeed bless you to set the captives free today!

Accurate representation of the narcissistic relationship.

YES! The difference between speaking your truth and running a smear campaign! And YES! My parents said some great things ABOUT me to make it seem THEY must be such great parents, but of course they didn’t say them to me and used all the abusive tactics you mention @Danish - all to help themselves play the victim when I refused to take more of their abuse!

@chrisantoniou4366

4 ай бұрын

That is exactly what narcissistic parents do.

As soon I found out he was a narcissist, I planned to leave quickly and quietly as soon as I could..

“It’s not how you’re alike. It’s how you’re not”

Its alot harder when you are married and have at least a child with the narcissist... my wife left our home on october 24th and she signed a lease with another man about a month later... legally I cannot no contact because she has rights to the kids this stovetop is definitely red hot but have to keep touching lol and can't throw alot of fits because I have our kids and she abandoned them its been over 90 days with minimal amount of contact. She's spent 4 hours our less with them anytime shes came over or taken them and 4 hours was once and normally her visits or calls last about 30-60minutes. Please keep your head up and just accept what is and try your best to be your best!❤

I go silent, because I get tired of him talking over me, I can only get a few words out and he does this every time. So, I just quit talking, I give up. Then later on he brings it up and tries to make me feel guilty. Now he brings up the fact that I am a Narciccist, I give up on trying to say anything any more because he uses everything against me, even tells me I am a Hitlar type person. If I ask a question I am attacking him, then comes the screaming, he gets right in my fact and screams.

@ekdaufin1485

4 ай бұрын

ACCUSATION, NOT “fact” …Stay strong!

@sandragranger2181

4 ай бұрын

I would if I could, but can't so will have to wait, till time comes I can.@@jbrown2908

@sandragranger2181

4 ай бұрын

Not fact! I guess you know something I don't!@@ekdaufin1485

Something that I have experienced when I react to the extreme abuse my mother and family give me is that police and other officials aren’t exactly trained in all of this so they can’t tell the difference. So they think I’m the abuser. Then they begin to gaslight me. After a certain cop spoke to my mom, they came over to arrest me without ever having a conversation with me and told me, “You aren’t worthy of the mother that you have let alone worthy enough to be alive.”

The last one… wow. I am the last person to cheat, but I did this and it was out of desperation and a means to leave the narcissist.

Needed this today, I feel like I'm angry all the time.Hes making me into a person I don't want to be.

I wait videos everyday ❤

In the beginning I thought he was gonna say if you don't subscribe, you are a narcissist 😂

Going no contact is so hard to do for me.

Danish... THANK YOU ❤. After 32 years married ... this malicious malignant narc 😢 attempting to devastate my life AND God gave me you. Grateful ☺️

@biggwillbeats4384

2 ай бұрын

22 years.🤦🏾‍♂️🙆🏾‍♂️😩

I admit I did Hoover or watched some former friends or ex’s who deeply hurt me, ghosted without a reason, lied, misinterpreted me, some I suspect are narcissist. While I accept I’ll never see or hear from them again, it does bother me knowing they are in a relationship or married and I wonder if they will ever break up because the one who hurt me I feel doesn’t deserve to have anyone and they are too immature to be in a relationship. On the other hand, there’s a good chance those people are causing drama to their loved ones too. Still, it bothers me that those relationships last longer with them than with me.

@chrisantoniou4366

4 ай бұрын

Don't worry, you're normal.

@Dj.D25

4 ай бұрын

They wanted to end things, I was more willing to work things out, try to fix whatever issues they had with me. Some of them I did feel it was better to keep my distance because it seemed anything I said or do might set them off.@@jbrown2908

I have been running a small business as a therapist. Most of my clients want me to be their best provider for their problems but spend very little money. If possible, they want me to deliver services without pay. In the US, a lot of people have 'gratis' mindset because that's how government teach them. Without significant contribution Government will supply yhem for free. But my business is a private sector. To cope with this behavior, I started to be a NARCISSIST. How? I don't deliver benefits if I don't make a profit. Am I a Narcissist? My advice: do not running business in the US. Why? We are here living in Narcissist Psychopathic society. Don't walk...run! 😂

Gone through all this,for 20+ years and no one listened me. His atrocities crossed all limits.

I think about this at least once a day. I have many of the characteristics that makes me dislike my mother. The main diff is that I'm self aware to a point where I excessively ppl please but the constant focus on my actions and feelings make me feel very self absorbed.

Thank You so much. I'm not running a smear campaign but I am speaking up. I am defending myself because I was the vicitm. But THEY are acting like the victims of MY finally speaking up after decades. They are lunatics! They dished it out for decades while I defended them or just left them alone. Now I'm the bad guy. There is no sense here.

My husband of almost 7 yrs he gave me the silent treatment. I felt so unworthy of his love (I know now he 1stlove bombed me!) I was sad, angry & waited for good behavior to return. I learned from many KZread videos all who & what he is. He said I was a liar, a cheater & a thief! Everything I found out he was! I’m giving myself the permission to be happy! I’m planning an exit. Wish me well & keep me in your prayers please. Be well. We can survive these ppl & fully recover with time & education!! Lotsa love ❤️

This video is a revelation, sometimes I worry if I am wrong, think am I the wrong person, worry about my feelings, actions and reactions. Feel like this video was meant for me. Thank you, this video screams I am not a bad person.

We need this video, thank you 🙏🏻 I’m doubting every day.. it’s horrible and I need truth & clarity of mind. Your words as reassuring and clarifying. Thank you

Thank Danish 🙏

When I found out my former Husband was a Narcissist, I thought about cutting him off out of my life. But soon I began to realize that other people I'd known along the way were also Narcissists, or Covert Narcissists. Or a Sociopath. Even, in the case of my second Husband, Munchousen's-by-proxy plus Psychopath. So, I have learned the best way to cope with these nutters. Plan to leave asap. And protect myself from them in future. It does explain how I grew up, all the crazy things I couldn't understand back then. Learning about these conditions, has helped me so much, but there's no quick fix. I've got to work on me and my life now, rather than constantly giving of myself to others. Not being selfish, just time to heal, reflect, and plan for a better future. And it's thanks to Danish in particular. It changed my life when I first heard those words; "Let the healing begin, and continue" .

Narcissists never wonder or worry if they are a narcissist.

Most of the mom doesn’t want to tell about their narcissistic husbands tourcher to others because their children would be justified as a narcissist. I have been suffering with a narcissist husband in all aspects for 33 years couple life. But i always tried to hide the real situation for the sake of my children and most of us who blame me. Your advice in this video to tell the truth but it would never be possible for me and many other mom. Thanks

Beautifully said. Thank you so much I love your videos and is helping me healing day by day.

I told my Narc I've forgiven him for every pain he has cost me and asked the way forward in peace. He said " well thank you but I've done any harm to you" He the switched to blaming me and accusing me of infidelity. I was shocked and regretted speaking to him.

Honestly, I LOVE the silent treatment. Less drama

The unfortunate truth is, to get rid of a narcissist, so you can be yourself again, you have to behave just like them. Be selfish, self-serving, don't care about anybody, but yourself. Then, you can, in your own space & time, recover who you once were. He was so wrapped up in status symbols, when I wasn't remotely materialistic, he constantly told me that his friends "wouldn't allow their woman to behave like you". Behave like what, having ambition, wanting a fulfilling career, having friends, going out, going on holiday with my friends, just once a year, like he did with his friends 4 times a year, my striving to be independent (futile), oh, THAT behaviour? I made him pay me to leave, on top of everything else, he'd financially abused me - I told him to write the cheque for my rented flat. When he cut up rough, I reminded him, that in 2 years just for his mortgage, he'd had £8,400 out of me. I told him that £850, compared to that, was a drop in the ocean. He's some other woman's problem now, the one he cheated on me with a year into our "relationship". I do not feel sorry for her!

God bless you always Darnish. From JANESVILLE, WISCONSIN USA

Gaslighters are quite the kind as well. Its like how every good man theres a good woman behind him, behind every good narc there is a gaslighting woman right behind him.

Thank you for saying that we're not narcissists for reacting in ways that we don't stand by. I started saying things I regret and got upset for myself for it. It's so nice to hear that this is a normal reaction for psychological abuse. I don't act this way to any other person, only to this person

Well phew! I was worried that I was a narcissist. 😂😂😂

Btw this was one of the best videos made so far...

Survivor here. My worst mistake was telling my master narcissist husband that I wanted a divorce. He was retired, and I was still young and working. Before I knew it, he had stolen all my money except from one 401k plan, gone to every neighbor in the neighborhood and told them that I was having an affair, and then two affairs and then I had been having affairs our entire marriage. Therefore, he was divorcing me. He called my employer "...as was his civic duty" to tell them I was engaging in unsavory and unethical behaviors outside work, etc. Of course, my employer asked me to resign. Once I move out of my house (just to get away from him and his threatening behavior), he started stalking me, disabling my car, and so on, until I had to file a police report. It was 12 years of hell and then three more years just to get divorced. Years later, I went to work for a government agency and ended up with a boss who ran a close second in the narcissist master class. By then I was old enough to retire early. I now know what to look for when I engage with people. If they even pale to a narcissist, I walk the other way.

I'm recovering from a 2 year friendship that exposed me to his narcissist behavior. One year of always questioning myself, thinking I was the problem and I was the horrible friend, when I was under his control. I finally stopped talking to him and it was the best decision I made. I have left a toxic community who supported him and am working on healing. It's going to be tough, but stay strong. Things will get better. ❤

Jesus came and took me away. No more guilt just out to Achieve~100% Peace Now. Within.

Really needed to see this today, thank you.

I lived with a narcissist for 16 years. It literally drove me crazy! I had no idea who I was anymore. I even questioned myself and wondered if it was really me who had the problem. I realized it was just the trauma that I was processing from all the years of being abused and neglected

Honestly almost started crying after hearing Sign 5, had a similar situation a few months back and blamed a lot of it on myself

Needed that video! Thankyou Danish! Your videos have been life saviour.

The "guilt" is gone, thanks to hours of tears, prayer to understand, and your videos!!! Thank you! p.s. I send your videos to my kids that dont talk to their mother...

I can 100% relate to all of this, minus the “stalking”/“checking up on people. All this is very painful and damaging to my being. I’ve come to learn that my entire family are narcissists. My mother is a “covert” narcissist. My dad was an “overt” narcissist. My younger sister is an “overt” narcissist. And I believe that my older brother is a “covert” narcissist or at the very least has strong narcissistic tendencies. I’ve been the “scapegoat” my whole life and nothing I say or do can change that. All I want is the financial ability and freedom to separate myself from these people and cut all ties. I feel like I’m constantly being “poisoned” and attacked. 😞

After years of living with false Hope I am just now understanding what Narcissism is, thank you.💌