Could you do a video about internal communication, something beyond "try journaling"? Maybe focusing on systems that experience their parts somatically vs verbally, systems newly aware of being a system or newly past the phobia of inner experiences? Seems like this is a bigger struggle for OSDD than DID and there is not much out there on this topic.

@annamolly1261

2 жыл бұрын

That was the general since I got from this video as well.

@Flusterette

Жыл бұрын

I hadn't thought about experiencing my parts somatically vs verbally. Huh. That explains a lot, and is highly relatable.

I used the term gaslighting myself to explain to my therapist how I feel about things I can't recall or memory issues with did. She replied you can get away from an abusive relationship with someone else but it's so hard if you do this to yourself.

This was a really helpful video thank you. I've always said I don't trust my own mind and have often been scared and avoidant of anything internal. It is something that distresses me, as your mind is the one place you cannot escape from so you end up living on the fringes of it. Either vacant or terrified, depending if triggered. Like you will be swallowed whole. I feel seen listening to this video. Thank you.

@thectadclinic

3 жыл бұрын

I agree, it is sometimes the most needed and most scary place for people to ‘visit’. It can be done, the balance is there, it may just take time and patience, with a few techniques along the way.

We look forward to your videos, as they are so helpful. Thank you!

@thectadclinic

3 жыл бұрын

Thank you, we will keep them coming!

At 8:27, you state that sometimes, short-term therapy is problematic "because that inner experience needs time to solve, to be able to create a foundation, a structure by which the person can maintain and manage the emotions of that inner experience, without dissociating." Can you please make a video that expands on this thought? Not so much the limitations of short-term therapy, but more along the lines of building those structures within? I am beginning to see this in my own life with DID. It's a lot of work to build these foundations, and yet, that is exactly what seems to lead to healing and to a better ability to stay stable and to function. Although, depending on the day, I still want to crawl into a hole and not come out again. I'm a plodder, so I will plod. ;) I don't think too many therapists actually understand what you have hit upon with this comment at the end -- the necessity (and the time commitment) of building solid internal foundations. More, please! :)

What inner experience is = our internal perception, our thinking, our feeling, how we see, how we understand, how we make sense of the world; a natural and normal part of life In dissociators, inner experience can also be = the voices in our heads, emotions from out of nowhere, all the sensations that we interpret and understand as part of our inner world; in those with trauma histories, inner experience can bring about feelings of shame, guilt, sadness, rage; can lead to a phobia of inner experience (2:12, powerful, usually avoided); also (2:29), dissociated parts can bring in their own inner experience; it's natural to want to avoid inner experiences that are difficult to handle What are four reasons why people with trauma in their past struggle to work through inner experience? 1. (3:12) Inner experience is overwhelming Intense emotions Attachment-based trauma histories may mean that the person was not taught how to manage intense emotions Lack of regulation or containment 2. (4:32) Inner experience is incorrectly interpreted "Good" or "bad" Internal experience may lead the person with trauma history to incorrect conclusions about the self, rather than realizing that the inner experience is a natural consequence of having lived through trauma Avoidance of the inner experience as a way to shut off feelings of being "bad" 3. (5:43) Inner experience is a reminder of trauma Things that happened to us can come back through inner experience -- memories, feelings These can trigger trauma reactions, anxiety, fear, zoning out, shutting down, losing time, relocating, switching, etc. This is why the phase treatment model is important, because we work on stabilization first 4. (7:00) Inner experience can feel like a predictor that something bad is about to happen They "know" something awful will happen, it has happened before, it will happen again Anxiety, trauma will be repeated, avoidance

Dr. Lloyd you have educated me on my diorder like you would never believe , I love you & your work tremendously !

Thank you, once again for this. I always find your videos so helpful.

@thectadclinic

3 жыл бұрын

That’s always to good to hear!

This was scary relatable. It does make it hard to have any kind of proper healing when in an abusive environment, and I keep using avoidance or rejection to deal with the inner experience. At least now I'm a bit more self-aware about it. 👍

@thectadclinic

2 жыл бұрын

Agreed, that is extremely tough, stabilisation often means simply having a safe place to live, and doing the intricate healing work needs that.

Thank you! This was such a clear cohesive narrative of what we experience. Your explanation helps us understand ourselves better.

@thectadclinic

3 жыл бұрын

Thank you!

Every single one of your videos is beyond helpful.... started going through them all last week, but this one was especially well timed! Can't wait to finish the back log hopefully this weekend :)

@thectadclinic

3 жыл бұрын

Wow, that is lovely to hear! More are coming, hopefully they will be useful for you as well.

Thank you- all of your videos have been really helpful!

@thectadclinic

2 жыл бұрын

Thank you!

Ty.

Thank you so much for this as always it is helping make sense of our world. Trying to slowly work though the book you mentioned now. It is slow, as the book can have moments of being quite triggering. We judge our inner world very harshly, we are our own worst critic on everything, especially our inner world. When triggered our entire system and then inner world would lead to cascade switching and as happened over the weekend we slipped into depersonalization and derealization. Our body became numb, but we could still function. Sometimes when triggered we need to escape into our inner world to help function in the outer world, especially around other people.

@thectadclinic

3 жыл бұрын

Of course, space from difficult parts of life is always needed, please remember that what you carry inside can also be your cheerleader and activist, not just your critic. Being self-compassionate and positive is not always easy.

@Cathy-xi8cb

3 жыл бұрын

As he stated, and the authors state quite clearly, this book is best used with a therapist to avoid it being overwhelming. It isn't a self-help manual if you have DID. Using tools incorrectly could be a form of self-harm, and that helps no one.

My inner experience (after 25 years of therapy for DID) is STILL very jumbled & confusing. A LOT of those horrible abuse messages are sooo ingrained that they are still there. I am very slowly learning not to default to the negative, but it is still right under the surface & bad days can bring it to the forefront.

@Typhoon792

Жыл бұрын

Is it possible to work through?

Thank you for another really helpful and informative video. I also look forward to checking out the book resource. Would you be willing (if it’s helpful for the DID/OSDD community at large) to review the overlap or differences between DID/OSDD and IFS comorbid dissociation (eg. IFS + DPDR)? I was pursuing possible OSDD with my therapist, but she said the IFS+dissociation fits better. I trust her and am simply looking to better understand the internal variances. I’ve found your channel to be very helpful in discussing my internal dialogue with her, but I also don’t want to take away from the community at large if this would not help DID/OSDD persons.

Ever insightful as always. However like some of the other comments the content was a little invalidating. I understand this is more about the fundamentals from an outsider perspective of starting the conversation around acknowledging and inner dialogue and/or the phobia of it. That said, I think this video actually highlights the disconnect between therapeutiC/academic language and lived understanding of some systems. From what I gathered of other systems and my& experiences, "internal experience" references inner world/headspace and system interactions. While the academic dialogue seems to reference and interaction with one's internal self or subconscious. While I can understand it's use in the context of helping new systems or singlet who are dissociating to start that internal work. As system that does lots of co-fronting and internal communication this academic definition comes off as disingenuous to the experience. Personally I think the terms "internal avoidance" or "internal association" would better fit the definition as you explained it. I understand "internal experience" can mean a lot for different mental health communities...I just do not think the phrase as defined is an honest reflection in the context of OSDD/DID systems. Just my opinion.

Interesting.. makes sense.

@thectadclinic

2 жыл бұрын

Thank you!

I lived my life and self-realized through my inner-experience, guided by my heart and conscience and mentally developed. Now that I'm traumatized to such a severe extent (where the conditions and affect is similar to what you're describing), what do I go on? The world fell apart, my soul/identity was destroyed, my body was destroyed, I'm alone. How can anyone live like this? PS- How does it not mean that you're a bad person? If you're broken, you're not good. You're not connected to your authentic self. You're alone. Nobody cares or values you. You're so messed up and whatever you've had to offer, no matter how great, his been devalued and disposed of. Maybe it's not (entirely or at all) your fault, but if the purpose in life is to bring yourself into alignment on all levels with the good, how can you if you're literally this broken? You're just in a permanent state of brokenness, tricking yourself forever into it being okay? It's not the same as being crippled from a car accident. This is your life, your personality, your everything! How are you supposed to ANYTHING like this? You're just a soulless animal! I can't do this. I need to be with my inner-experience so that I can actually focus on other people positively and caringly (ironically). I don't want to be outside myself all the time (while simultaneously in my head). Then I'm just seeing everything through the lens of trauma. I refuse to live this way. We're meant to be here, even if to suffer, to consciously grow, but meaningfully... This is the absolute lowest and smallest state you can be in. An infant is more conscious. This isn't just self-hate/negative talk. It's just true. I'm not allowed to be this by anyone, by any standard.

I threw that one across the room too! **sigh** try again.

You are amazing o mined help so bad why can’t you be in New Zealand

Your videos are really good but just like the inner experience, I tend to avoid them often ^^ Your intro is really nice btw.

@thectadclinic

3 жыл бұрын

Thank you!

Your videos ate incredibly helpful. I am using g the book you reference at the beginning but the shortcomings of the book are that it does not give you help! It tells you what yo do but not how to do it! I find that incredibly triggering and unhelpful whereas you give the same information without "telling me what I have to/need to learn"

@thectadclinic

Жыл бұрын

Hi Nadine, the book is designed to be worked through in therapy, so each step is guided there. People do use this on their own, using the worksheets to start asking questions and building confidence, though this is not the recommended route.

@nadineannett9586

Жыл бұрын

I'm using with a therapist but still find some of the language unhelpful.

What do you think about the false memory foundation? Do you think false memories are possible?

@thectadclinic

3 жыл бұрын

It is easy to be tricked by memory, (see research in suggestibility) so we have to be careful when establishing what are true memories. When people in therapy are finding their memories, it is for them to decide their reality, including what may or may not have happened during amnesic periods unless there is corroborative fact.

Hi I was wondering if you would recommend this book for anyone doing self trauma therapy?

@thectadclinic

3 жыл бұрын

Some of the skills in there are great for self-help, but it depends on the individual, their stability and support systems.

Can a person force a change if they fall into a to young of one and can't do enough to take care of themselves? What should they do if they are still getting abused via online videos with electronic bitches re-abusing them through another person they do not know? Obviously there's a problem with that person even knowing they were abused.

My cousin and I both have DID. We were raised totally differently and have experienced very different traumas. The only similarity is that we had sexual trauma from early childhood. I'm wondering if DID is genetic. We were also diagnosed separately without each other knowing. What kind of research is there on genetics and DID?

@thectadclinic

3 жыл бұрын

We have no real evidence to suggest a genetic cause, the brain changes that can occur take place after trauma.

@breathinglight3124

2 жыл бұрын

I assumed there was a genetic factor because my mother had a dissociative disorder like I do. But maybe I didn't inherit it from her. It was probably because both of us were sexually abused by her pedophile father who sadistically got us both on a regular basis (between ages of 2 and 7.)

@platformblues

2 жыл бұрын

@@breathinglight3124 If not genetic, I wonder if there could be a chance of epigenetic predisposition. Sending you empathy from across the internet 💖

@Flusterette

2 жыл бұрын

There could be an intergenerational trauma aspect contributing to the developmental trauma that causes CPTSD & dissociative disorders, if the primary caregivers are the trauma source. But the developmental aspect is 'nurture' over 'nature,' because of how much the brain develops in the first ~2 years.

8 weeks of therapy you get from the NHS is a total waste of time, definitely made things worse for me

@thectadclinic

2 жыл бұрын

Hi Ruth, I am very sad to hear this, we try and develop better services by assisting the NHS where we can, and there are some great departments out there. If you want to get in touch we may be able to help get you other options.

@struthyruth69

2 жыл бұрын

@@thectadclinic My area haven't anyone trained in DID just given a working diagnosis and told to join a online support group. Will contact you Thank you

@michellewilkie4387

2 жыл бұрын

@@thectadclinic l Athank you

love your videos, hated the book. I found it to be condescending, contradictory and invalidating. There is nothing as invalidating as being told that for 57 years, you haven't been a whole person.

@Cathy-xi8cb

3 жыл бұрын

Structural dissociation doesn't say you are not a whole person. Not an integrated personality? Yeah, it says THAT. Different thing. Read pages 7-9 carefully. Of course, people with DID and OSDD are whole people. People in comas are whole and complete. They don't have easy access to memory and don't smoothly shift states of awareness either. But they are still whole people. This book is about dissociative disorders DID and OSDD, and it has the best active strategies for everyday living with DID that I have seen so far.

@suejorgensen46

3 жыл бұрын

Pia Muran, I haven't read the book so I can only comment on it in the context of what the video says. But, it is using the theory of structural dissociation Do you believe in a different theory of how we " as DID or OSDD" are organized? That would be interesting because I will always read and look at other theories I would be interested in hearing HOW, with examples it differs from your experience

@piamuran3557

3 жыл бұрын

@@Cathy-xi8cb the book mentions several times being a "whole" person. I have issue with this. I have all the emotions and feelings of an "integrated" person. I am extremely high functioning but I feel this book doesn't reflect me at all. The only thing I feel this book is quite good is describing symptoms.

@piamuran3557

3 жыл бұрын

@@suejorgensen46 Thank you Sue. I can only answer for myself. Maybe I am an anomaly even to osdd. I feel like I am a whole person with all the emotions of an "integrated" person. I have good friendships, a stable job (12 years) and live a normal life. I have almost nil communication with the others but I know they are many of all sorts (human, adult and children, animals and mythological beings). I live the outside life (for the most part) and they live the inside life. I am not privy to the inside, but at 58, diagnosed last year I doubt that much will change.

@suejorgensen46

3 жыл бұрын

@@piamuran3557 I was hoping for your ideas on, if you think the theory/ model of structural dissociation isn't applicable to your experience and you think some other model works better? Or your ideas if there isn't a theory Did any of the workbook excercises help you to talk to your inner world which in the end is the point of the book.