Why Do They Come Back After Rejecting You?

Тәжірибелік нұсқаулар және стиль

A tale as old as time... she breaks your heart and as soon as you get back up on your feet she's sliding back into your DM's for another chance back in your life. In this video, I give you my best advice for what to do in this situation.
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Пікірлер: 4 200

  • @kc270352
    @kc2703522 жыл бұрын

    "they never wanted you when you was Nothing, always reject them when you become something" 💯

  • @miniweeddeerz1820

    @miniweeddeerz1820

    2 жыл бұрын

    I mean isn't that kinda what you want. You improved yourself so now you are more desirable.

  • @kc270352

    @kc270352

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@miniweeddeerz1820 Obviously

  • @raularmas317

    @raularmas317

    2 жыл бұрын

    I think you are looking at things from an upside down position. Neither of you is nothing. You are both worthy of all the love and respect any other miracle is. Your job, should you decide to accept it, is to find/be aware enough to recognize when someone is willing to start mirroring your own behaviors. Imitation being the sincerest form of flattery. Are you willing/able to reciprocate?

  • @kc270352

    @kc270352

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@raularmas317 stop taking things seriously, its just a "saying"

  • @bazrezna9963

    @bazrezna9963

    2 жыл бұрын

    The woman should want you for the person that you are. If you don’t have a lot of money and you’re working on a minimum wage job and she loves you still and stays with you through your journey, she’s a keeper. She should encourage you and you should encourage her. It’s about team work, working together and helping each other out

  • @josephstevens9888
    @josephstevens98882 жыл бұрын

    A girl once told me I was her "back-up" guy in case the relationship she was in didn't work out. I responded to her she better get a different "back-up guy". I don't play second string in relationships.

  • @UnexpectedWonder

    @UnexpectedWonder

    2 жыл бұрын

    That's ridiculous! He audacity is sheer Insanity!

  • @mindislife

    @mindislife

    2 жыл бұрын

    Tell her you rather watch dog poo harden than to be with her

  • @GetIntoYourLife

    @GetIntoYourLife

    2 жыл бұрын

    Sounds like middle-school, high school stuff

  • @marte1376

    @marte1376

    2 жыл бұрын

    that was very rude, I think that is one of the things, even if it's true, you should never tell.

  • @williamheinsinger7390

    @williamheinsinger7390

    2 жыл бұрын

    Boom 💥

  • @Poudiy
    @Poudiy Жыл бұрын

    She didn’t want me in her prime, I don’t want her in her decline

  • @mathematicaleconomist4943

    @mathematicaleconomist4943

    2 ай бұрын

    Good one!

  • @oooogrimmoooo

    @oooogrimmoooo

    2 ай бұрын

    Plain and simple

  • @RubenMendoza-is4xl

    @RubenMendoza-is4xl

    Ай бұрын

    Bars

  • @billkittleman9631

    @billkittleman9631

    Ай бұрын

    Well stated ✌️

  • @user-yi5qh5zh3d

    @user-yi5qh5zh3d

    11 күн бұрын

    Fire 🎉 good one

  • @hmanfilms
    @hmanfilms Жыл бұрын

    It’s simple: they thought they could do better in life without you, thought the grass was greener. Then realized they wanted you.

  • @rob-robi

    @rob-robi

    2 ай бұрын

    which is at times , pure human nature :D

  • @vinloc3854

    @vinloc3854

    Ай бұрын

    @@rob-robi nah.... it's only folks who treat people like things rather than people that do stuff like this.

  • @sixfeetunder0105

    @sixfeetunder0105

    Ай бұрын

    you over pursue instead of letting them come to you

  • @legalfictionnaturalfact3969

    @legalfictionnaturalfact3969

    Ай бұрын

    Sixfeet, what are you talking about?

  • @billkittleman9631

    @billkittleman9631

    Ай бұрын

    I would never accept that person back .. but that’s just me

  • @TacticalNuke321
    @TacticalNuke3212 жыл бұрын

    Stay in no contact and focus on you. The best way to respond to rejection is to walk away and mean it. That is how you keep your dignity.

  • @milliesaysokboomer

    @milliesaysokboomer

    Жыл бұрын

    Why do people always say to never be friends with the one who rejected you? I mean sometimes I do that but most of the times i don’t cause I hardly ever am ‘down bad’ for anyone, like if they reject me I’m moving on within the day. I don’t mind being friends unless it’s clear they’re still using it against me

  • @TacticalNuke321

    @TacticalNuke321

    Жыл бұрын

    @@milliesaysokboomer Because it’s better for your mental health if you didn’t want to get dumped and if you’re heart broken and send you through a hell of turmoil. And it also increases the likelihood of getting back together with an ex partner

  • @jackjacky8105

    @jackjacky8105

    Жыл бұрын

    coach corey wayne was here...

  • @TacticalNuke321

    @TacticalNuke321

    Жыл бұрын

    @@jackjacky8105 Hell yeah

  • @debanikgoswami4834

    @debanikgoswami4834

    Жыл бұрын

    @@TacticalNuke321 I would keep her as side chick

  • @alanguages
    @alanguages2 жыл бұрын

    Never accept a person who rejected you. Never attempt to go with a person you rejected. It is best for both of you.

  • @theworldisimmense

    @theworldisimmense

    2 жыл бұрын

    @Boy Wonder black pill the truth

  • @user-kcrpine

    @user-kcrpine

    2 жыл бұрын

    Boy Wonder - B S you don’t. The world is literally packed with equally ugly women. Your problem is the fact that far too many like you are eager to be friendzoned, simp for, or orbit such women, freely giving them validation they do not deserve and have not earned. Many take it one step further and end up pumping so much B S into such chick’s heads they end up truly believing they’re top notch and deserve nothing short of their delusional version of Prince Charming. This is why 80%+ of average or under women today think 80%+ of men are below average. Women are human just like you. The difference is they’re generally coddled from birth whereas we are not. Stop treating the fact they’ve a front hole as if it makes them all goddesses. There’s more of them than there are you…

  • @tomasdeleondominguez7693

    @tomasdeleondominguez7693

    2 жыл бұрын

    I fully agree.

  • @UnexpectedWonder

    @UnexpectedWonder

    2 жыл бұрын

    Why were you rejected? How old were you two?

  • @OjukwuIsaac

    @OjukwuIsaac

    2 жыл бұрын

    @Boy Wonder There's other ways to be attractive.

  • @zyx777zyx
    @zyx777zyx Жыл бұрын

    29 year old male here... I would NEVER accept a woman back into my life who broke up with me for 3 reasons... 1 - My feelings for her go away quickly after the breakup 2 - If she dumped me once, she'll probably do it again 3 - There are so many other girls out there to choose from

  • @winning3329

    @winning3329

    Жыл бұрын

    Yeah right. If she was extremely hot and you couldn't do better you would beg her back

  • @domino6434

    @domino6434

    11 ай бұрын

    i doubt you get any action homie

  • @user-xu4xj2cd2j

    @user-xu4xj2cd2j

    11 ай бұрын

    Haha feelings only go away if you don't love them, and men have less options realistically that's why it's usually the girls do the dumping

  • @mebansutnga2566

    @mebansutnga2566

    11 ай бұрын

    ​@@domino6434he got 0 game bruh

  • @EmilyGloeggler7984

    @EmilyGloeggler7984

    9 ай бұрын

    Then those women who dumped you dodged a bullet. Thank God they realized how fickle you are.

  • @Guywithapenis
    @Guywithapenis Жыл бұрын

    Hello everyone, I am a 78 years old man and let me give you a great piece of that will save all your precious time in life. The greatest life's advice in terms of relationships romantic or non romantic it doesn't matter. The advice is if someone is leaving or left and then plans to return then never ever and ever let them come back. 99% of the people return because of regret which is actually the idea of not having something, and only 1% of them return because of the realisation or epiphany. Please don't waste your time.

  • @jasonwonkawich5275

    @jasonwonkawich5275

    3 ай бұрын

    True wisdom from a person I'm sure whose life has had it's own share of misfires, and mistakes. Thanks for sharing - it can be tough to maintain resolve.

  • @Pandan1351

    @Pandan1351

    3 ай бұрын

    I believe this. He was alone or not finding what he wanted that worked out for him. Almost two years later of disregard and him blaming me for everything and he “hopes to see me soon” but with no sincere answer as to why other than, “why not”. A 45 yr old man with a childish answer deserves nothing of my time. Question is why does he want to when I was the reason that either “ruined” everything I was to be the blame for EVERYTHING. And it is because he is alone, and I just came back from an over seas business trip. Was living my life, having the best of time and experiences. All without him so now he wants to reconnect? Is why i asked why, and got a why not answer. NOPE, I’m going to continue living my life without his misery, or being a subject matter of his choice for the moment. He chose to end it, so it should’ve stopped right there with me being a choice. I’m not a toy

  • @thozacatz3684

    @thozacatz3684

    3 ай бұрын

    Respectfully, older age doesn’t necessarily mean the correct nor healthy knowledge or success in relationships. Depending on how and why a person chose to leave the relationship, where they abused, neglected, not valued or cheated on or did a difference in life’s aspirations or goals differ? Depending on age, sometimes a person may come back wiser. But it doesn’t mean you should jump right in head first. Take things slow and watch for what they do and not what they say if you’re considering to reunite.

  • @jasonwonkawich5275

    @jasonwonkawich5275

    3 ай бұрын

    @@thozacatz3684 Semantics - you're overthinking it. Toodles!

  • @marcd2743

    @marcd2743

    3 ай бұрын

    @@thozacatz3684 You can lead a horse to water but you can't make them drink.

  • @theharshtruth8563
    @theharshtruth8563 Жыл бұрын

    I had 2 of my exes (one from 20 years ago and one from 8 years ago) try to get in touch with me during the pandemic lockdowns. They made it seem at first like they were checking up on me to see if I was ok... but eventually, their true motive came out and they asked to move into my place to get back on their feet because they were still living paycheck to paycheck and their workplace closed down. I deleted / ghosted them both. I paid off my mortgage in 2015 and it wasn't for women to invite themselves to move in and get comfy. They weren't present during the majority of my struggle so they aren't invited to share in my success.

  • @Vex916T

    @Vex916T

    Жыл бұрын

    The Covid lockdowns caused crazy people to come out of the woodwork because my older brother's girlfriend that he separated from 10 years before 2020 randomly called him a few months into the pandemic to move in our house. When my oldest sister heard of this scheme she gave my older brother a long lecture and told him that his ex-girlfriend is prohibited from coming near our house especially because she cheated on him and has kids with another dude. To this day my older brother has not spoken a thing about his ex haha.

  • @bbc20231

    @bbc20231

    Жыл бұрын

    Amen 🙏🏾Champ

  • @casebycase_904

    @casebycase_904

    Жыл бұрын

    Good for u I hate when people try to crawl back into ur life for the mulah

  • @priestesskatherine2640

    @priestesskatherine2640

    Жыл бұрын

    I can help u

  • @Dynamic-cb9jy

    @Dynamic-cb9jy

    Жыл бұрын

    Well done.

  • @Coyote-wm5op
    @Coyote-wm5op2 жыл бұрын

    They want your attention back but as soon as they get it they’ll ghost you and play games because they think they have you wrapped around their finger. Best thing you can do is completely ignore them.

  • @mortenlarsen7220

    @mortenlarsen7220

    2 жыл бұрын

    Actually no blow up their phone and act deseprate, works 100% of the time they will get annyoed and in the long run they will never want to comeback to you. It never fails to do that, it pushes them away forever.

  • @aquarius9043

    @aquarius9043

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@mortenlarsen7220 Power move right there.

  • @mortenlarsen7220

    @mortenlarsen7220

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@aquarius9043 Yea it is and funny enough i learned acting that way pushed females away, so then i started to use it as a way to have my butt cleared forever so i would never have them comeback. And to this date it has worked FLAWLESSLY, perfect move to do to get rid of them for good once they start moving outside of the relationship.

  • @kerryfoster1

    @kerryfoster1

    2 жыл бұрын

    Say 'I'm already someone else's baby'........

  • @gargoyliangaming6556

    @gargoyliangaming6556

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@mortenlarsen7220 Reverse psychology. Must admit pretty creative.

  • @sirmarshall9521
    @sirmarshall9521 Жыл бұрын

    The 'work on yourself' part is the most important portion of this video, in my opinion. A lot of people really need time to be 'single' and find joy from life that isn't filtered through attachment and codependency. If you aren't happy with your own company, then you'll never be a healthy contributor to a relationship.

  • @autumnpendergast9151

    @autumnpendergast9151

    Жыл бұрын

    100% this comment deserves way more likes. Most people these days are terrified of love an terrified of losing it. It is a tragedy. I married after being together then separating for several years. We had an incredibly profound relationship. Had a daughter. And we did break up again because he was so messy (he had grown immensely but not enough to wholly heal his soul) but stayed best friends until he passed away 15 years ago. We lived and loved so deeply and it was worth every second. I wouldnt change a thing. I have raised our daughter and she is an incredible young woman. She has asked me to write a book about my relationship with her father. Love deeply and know that it is beautiful to experience it all. Our life is incredible and short. Take it on full bore!

  • @samusaran7317

    @samusaran7317

    Жыл бұрын

    Work on yourself so you appear to be a good little pet wallet looking for a home. That's a trap...

  • @MyShapeofmyHeart

    @MyShapeofmyHeart

    Жыл бұрын

    You can work on yourself and meet people were all growing and building as we get older going to work and then coming home after gym and sitting there being "single" for this weird set amount of time till someone else's thinks it's now time to live your life and find a partner is silly. Sure have hobbies, goals and dreams. But don't pause life to work on yourself life is short as hell and making a family or finding someone isn't going to happen by sitting at home after work and gym. And basically watching your life tick by. Doesn't mean you shouldn't be content being alone but it's human nature to connect and build with others. Most people who say this are the ones with a wife husband etc and have never really experienced the negative effects of prolonged exposure to being alone too much and almost sheltering themselves from living. We have only one life don't be afraid fight for it and live it and not on some societal time clock.

  • @SouljaMan

    @SouljaMan

    Жыл бұрын

    Water yourself first so you can feed others

  • @MyShapeofmyHeart

    @MyShapeofmyHeart

    Жыл бұрын

    @@SouljaMan well I already do that I have a garden of 150 plants every year and I can LOL

  • @philipepling
    @philipepling6 ай бұрын

    You deserve to be with someone who chose you first. Know your worth; you should never be someone else's backup plan.

  • @Philosophyoftruth_
    @Philosophyoftruth_ Жыл бұрын

    Once they reject you, don’t accept them back into your life. There’s no point surrounding yourself with people who are like that.

  • @hmklegend2791

    @hmklegend2791

    Жыл бұрын

    True💯

  • @lordkiesor22

    @lordkiesor22

    Жыл бұрын

    Truth. 💯💯

  • @FreshFowkz

    @FreshFowkz

    Жыл бұрын

    2nd that, this is soooo fucking true. don't fall for that trap, its a test by the universe, if you really moved on or not. never settle for being a 2nd prize for someone who doesn't value you as a human.

  • @Anthony-db7cs

    @Anthony-db7cs

    Жыл бұрын

    Depends on context

  • @richardleetbluesharmonicac7192

    @richardleetbluesharmonicac7192

    Жыл бұрын

    Agreed

  • @samreen.
    @samreen.2 жыл бұрын

    Never give somebody a second opportunity to reject you again!

  • @tomasdeleondominguez7693

    @tomasdeleondominguez7693

    2 жыл бұрын

    I fully agree. We all must have some dignity above all.

  • @wellingtonuzamere3511

    @wellingtonuzamere3511

    2 жыл бұрын

    Exactly, no need to make a fool of yourself again

  • @kala9912

    @kala9912

    2 жыл бұрын

    That’s me! He break up with me I start cry etc come back come back and we come together, after half year he broke up once again…… f*ck, don’t make my mistake!!!

  • @datroof2262

    @datroof2262

    2 жыл бұрын

    It's like taking the milk out of the fridge, smelling it "oh this has gone bad!" Then putting it right back in the fridge! Why?!

  • @thatgirlinthesouth

    @thatgirlinthesouth

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@kala9912 have been there very recently :(

  • @adrip7537
    @adrip7537 Жыл бұрын

    My husband left me for another woman 4 years ago. Everyone kept telling me he was going to come back, because we have 3 kids together and he was a good husband and father. I truly believed he was going to realize he made a mistake and he would come back home. He never did. He's happy with the woman he left me for, and they seem to have it all. It was hard for me because I was blindsided by it all. I'm doing a little better now, the kids are now teenagers and we're getting by. I have health issues and recently had major surgery, I spent 4 days in the hospital and he never checked up on me. It is what it is, I'm still trying my best to be happy, it's not easy but I'm slowly getting there.

  • @RandyChatter

    @RandyChatter

    3 ай бұрын

    ouch. sorry.

  • @chipprovost8345

    @chipprovost8345

    2 ай бұрын

    I hope you are doing better. Focus on your kids and yourself. There's a good man out there for you. Try to heal yourself as best you can so when you meet this man you'll be the best version of yourself. As a single man, I've met many divorced women who haven't healed and it shows within a few dates if not sooner.

  • @acheeksgaming4849

    @acheeksgaming4849

    26 күн бұрын

    I'm soo sorry that happened to you.i hope you get blessed 10 fold of what the devil stole!!

  • @Sorenthaz
    @Sorenthaz Жыл бұрын

    If anyone wants to come back, they need to earn it and things need to move slowly. That's a great way to filter out the more negative intentions because you aren't fully giving yourself back to them, and if they grow frustrated by it and try to rush things along then they aren't committed to it and just wanted an easy escape from stress or so on. If they genuinely care and want to work with you, they will do so.

  • @gregoryjanczak7013

    @gregoryjanczak7013

    2 ай бұрын

    Best answer I've read. Thank you for the time to write it.

  • @bartunthegreat2999
    @bartunthegreat29992 жыл бұрын

    Funny thing when you are single, finding a girlfriend is really difficult. But the moment you get a girlfriend that's when many other girls suddenly decide to give you the time of day.

  • @disenthrallmentcomic4302

    @disenthrallmentcomic4302

    2 жыл бұрын

    Or you might never find one. 25% of all Americans are single and die single

  • @bartunthegreat2999

    @bartunthegreat2999

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@disenthrallmentcomic4302 well yeah, that's the sad true.

  • @GetIntoYourLife

    @GetIntoYourLife

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@bartunthegreat2999 Sadder things have happened.

  • @gargoyliangaming6556

    @gargoyliangaming6556

    2 жыл бұрын

    Satan's distractions. Examine everyone.

  • @juanshaftpatel7488

    @juanshaftpatel7488

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@bartunthegreat2999 what are you great at?

  • @devonjones5200
    @devonjones52002 жыл бұрын

    They come back just to see if they still "got you" in her circle. Once she realized you still want her, she ghosts again

  • @nathantinsley07

    @nathantinsley07

    2 жыл бұрын

    Nah it’s a test and you probably failed.

  • @davidcoppotelli3957

    @davidcoppotelli3957

    2 жыл бұрын

    Yeah pretty much works out like that.

  • @juanalbertovasquez1817

    @juanalbertovasquez1817

    2 жыл бұрын

    This is true

  • @Aelyf

    @Aelyf

    2 жыл бұрын

    If you get too thirsty again when she initiates contact, she will flake. You have to play it cool and let her do the chasing and initiating contact. When she does, set up a date, and then get off the phone until the date. When she was the one who left, you'll have to let her to all the pursuing when she initiate contact again.

  • @mrlocolugo

    @mrlocolugo

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@Aelyf yes coach Corey Wayne 🙌🏽

  • @tmcorey1
    @tmcorey1 Жыл бұрын

    They come back when things don’t work out with the person they left you for. Simple. And they will leave again just the second they find another person that they think is “better”.

  • @djonin91
    @djonin91 Жыл бұрын

    Inconsistency is the biggest red flag for me, being in a relationship with someone like that just makes you miserable and there are people out there more deserving of your time.

  • @lovelystarchild
    @lovelystarchild2 жыл бұрын

    Once you reject me. It's OVER. I don't give second chances, so if you dump me well then you've made your choice, live with it. Never give second chances. If they do it once they WILL do it again. If they did not appreciate you the 1st time around, they will NOT appreciate you the second time around.

  • @elonzander8692

    @elonzander8692

    Жыл бұрын

    Top G

  • @anthonyharty1732

    @anthonyharty1732

    Жыл бұрын

    Yes, you are spot on.

  • @mikewillett5076

    @mikewillett5076

    Жыл бұрын

    Lol, not always true. Until you're together it's a game.

  • @abhijithma7823

    @abhijithma7823

    Жыл бұрын

    Provided : you have to be sure that have done your best to convince her at the first place...

  • @sifugurusensei

    @sifugurusensei

    Жыл бұрын

    I hate to admit it but its true. Ghosting is disrespectful. The kind of people that does this has no idea what it means to respect someone.

  • @hmanfilms
    @hmanfilms2 жыл бұрын

    It’s usually one of these: 1. They want to stroke their ego and see if they still “have you” 2. They want some quick validation and affection from you 3. They want to see how much you’ve moved on vs them 4. They need something emotionally from you 5. They’re guilty 6. The grass isn’t greener and they’re testing the waters IT IS RARELY EVER THIS: - They realize they made a mistake, have changed and grown, are more capable of loving you and giving you what you deserve and genuinely want to try again. People… if anyone rejects you and breaks up with you. Never take them back. You’re literally just communicating that it’s okay and you’re inviting them to do it again. They have all the cards and control. They now know they can walk away, fuck around with other people, and you’ll just take them back. Even if they’re with you, they won’t fully respect you (consciously or subconsciously). People rarely change, especially if they weren’t good to you while they were with you. Once somebody pushes you away, that trust is gone forever and there will never be a fully healthy relationship with a solid foundation. They lost THEIR chance with you, why are you giving them another go around to break your heart again? Find someone who wouldn’t leave you in the first place and made more of an effort to try.

  • @deadspazz

    @deadspazz

    2 жыл бұрын

    I disagree with you. People can change, I'm proof of that. Everybody's situation is different, so what didn't work for you, could work for me and visa versa.

  • @wayneshawlinski4898

    @wayneshawlinski4898

    2 жыл бұрын

    On point💯

  • @madikiestherkhiangte9884

    @madikiestherkhiangte9884

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@deadspazz you are rare😁👍🏻

  • @scrubhero3629

    @scrubhero3629

    2 жыл бұрын

    Nah, just leave them be

  • @Righteous1ist

    @Righteous1ist

    2 жыл бұрын

    You missed one. They're playing games.

  • @shuzzal3
    @shuzzal3 Жыл бұрын

    You just explained my ex in 12 minutes. This so called toxic mind game people play in a relationship is honestly overwhelming for me. I'm so tired of these rules. I just wanted to be pure with my feelings and emotions. But now despite my so much effort left me in misery. I'm trying to be patient and trying to realize this world is not meant to be perfect. I'm struggling but I hope someday I'll be happy.

  • @light3267

    @light3267

    Жыл бұрын

    alot of people are superficial unfortunately, had the same happen to me in the past.

  • @user-xu4xj2cd2j

    @user-xu4xj2cd2j

    11 ай бұрын

    Same I hope karma gets her

  • @Jdjwjdjzbsjwbb
    @Jdjwjdjzbsjwbb Жыл бұрын

    Stay strong my guys!! If she can leave you at your worst or cheat on you when you feeling a little bit more emotional she will do it again when you got back on track with life and goals. Find yourself one who builds together and stays even on your bad days

  • @siowmingfeng1925
    @siowmingfeng19252 жыл бұрын

    you are doing well 0:38 couldn't find anything "better" 3:42 genuine time to grow 5:29 you're with someone new 7:14 second guessing and regret 9:39

  • @4lugan

    @4lugan

    2 жыл бұрын

    F#ck. You’re with someone new happened to me, You are doing well happened too. Couldn’t find anything better… I have no idea

  • @pmoran7971

    @pmoran7971

    2 жыл бұрын

    There are good reasons why they come back normally by the age of 25 women have had a high body count and quite a few threesomes and are now looking to settle down with someone more permanently however after being with you for about 18 months they get very bored and go back onto the market so the best time for a man to get a settled relationship is when she reaches 50 by this time she has had an army of relationships and they will be undesirable to men mainly but not always because they are probably fat and have lots of body hair because they no longer feel the need to shave their legs every day at this age You can be 50% sure at this age they will be totally faithful which is reassuring If you want total assurance go for a fifty year who does not shave her face regularly as this will not appeal to many men I hope that helps!

  • @pentergon777

    @pentergon777

    2 жыл бұрын

    LEGEND!

  • @WendyOryen

    @WendyOryen

    2 жыл бұрын

    None of these are acceptable reasons

  • @AJFresh69

    @AJFresh69

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@pmoran7971 You're the real MVP

  • @MigueTran
    @MigueTran2 жыл бұрын

    It's easy to take things for granted when you have them.

  • @antonboludo8886

    @antonboludo8886

    2 жыл бұрын

    This is where the value of prayer comes in. Prayer is first and foremost giving thanks for what you currently have, not asking for more.

  • @MigueTran

    @MigueTran

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@antonboludo8886 Spiritual work is priceless work, I couldn't agree more. Feel free to see my videos on the matter.

  • @antonboludo8886

    @antonboludo8886

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@MigueTran Thank you :D

  • @MigueTran

    @MigueTran

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@antonboludo8886 no problems :)

  • @versatilelord8893

    @versatilelord8893

    Жыл бұрын

    So damn true

  • @577jrock
    @577jrock Жыл бұрын

    This has happened to me many times. Attractive young women have the illusion of unlimited options so they are reticent to commit to a guy actually in her 'commitment league' and not just interested in sex. Courtney says that maybe they see you are doing well after they dumped you and that turns them on or whatever --- ok but where were they when you were struggling? Are they going to abandon you again during hard times? That needs to be handled. This is why I don't watch a lot of women channels b/c they won't go there --- don't leave a guy when things get hard if you want an actual relationship with a man who actually cares about you.

  • @577jrock

    @577jrock

    Жыл бұрын

    @Kingdom House Nah this absolves them of accountability. We used to shame divorce, and that is the way we need to go for this to stop. It's anarchy otherwise, opportunistic nihilism. If they can't be accountable for themselves then its high time we hold them accountable.

  • @Kenny-ep2nf

    @Kenny-ep2nf

    9 ай бұрын

    @@577jrock smart man

  • @bfitnessjoe

    @bfitnessjoe

    9 ай бұрын

    This…

  • @HojaFPS

    @HojaFPS

    6 ай бұрын

    I honestly was in hard depression in my relationship. When I met her I did just fine, but I chose some ways in my career which made me think I dont have any more good perspectives. So I slowly got into depression and she broke up with me now a month ago. Looking at the situation and trying to be rational I cant blame her at all. I didnt love my self, I even hated myself honestly. The only thing I thought that went good in my life was her. Thats just not a base for a relationship to work out. I always thought when she breaks up, that my life is over - I am done! But the opposite happened. I cried when she broke up and those thoughts where in my head. Sadly, I wish i could ve had reacted better and make it easier for her and also for me. Anyway the next day I woke up, but I didnt just wake up from bed but I literally woke up. I went to the gym, started a diet, made a pro and con list for all my future perspectives and just started to go my way. In just 1 month, I lost weight, and do look a bit better (ofc U cant turn worlds in 1 month, but I found my way and I will be in shape in some months, - even if it takes a year or more I ll go that way. - I even went to a box training LOL and it was super rough but also super fun) - I found a job which I will start next month which is super good paid and... Idk my whole life changed and I can swear, that this is all she ever wanted from me. Nothing more, nothing less. I dont see her, I dont text her, nothing. I dont know what she is doing. Sometimes I do wonder. Sometimes I also do wonder if we ever broke up if I was a better version of my own. Anyway that girl saved me from my depression back then and Idk if i d be here without her. If she ll ever see me again, I can only look her into the eyes, If I m consitently on my way to become the best version I can be. And yea. Maybe. Maybe there ll be a chance that we come back together. Maybe not. Maybe She ll find someone else, maybe I will find someone else, but I would be foolish to say, that I should never take someone back who "dumped" me. Honestly, if I was her, I d be gone 1 Year earlier probably. But she always believed in me. Well atleast until she broke up, but If i m honest to myself, if she didnt break up, i wouldnt have changed anything. The Sad truth

  • @davebellamy4867

    @davebellamy4867

    4 ай бұрын

    ​@@HojaFPSI don't quite understand that. If you were OK when you met her andbadly iff later, didn't she contribute to your bad decisions? She never advised you into better decisions it seems.

  • @bobbyrebholz2183
    @bobbyrebholz2183 Жыл бұрын

    Thank you, Courtney. This honesty is very refreshing. I've also noticed that if the one broken up with is suddenly doing very well, the one that initiated the breakup was most likely the cause of most, if not all, of the relationship problems. It happens with narcissists and self-centered people because the person could be a victim of gas lighting and once they're not beaten down anymore emotionally, all of the sudden they bloom again once free.

  • @profucepenguin2999
    @profucepenguin29992 жыл бұрын

    Courtney always makes me feel better about the idea that there are better women out there for me.

  • @edheldude

    @edheldude

    2 жыл бұрын

    There might be better women but they're not there for you though.

  • @kevinc1593

    @kevinc1593

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@edheldude That is so rude.

  • @edheldude

    @edheldude

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@kevinc1593 How so? It's true. They're there in the open marketplace. They're not there FOR YOU but for anyone. It's up to you to compete. And there are more takers than there are "better women".

  • @kevinc1593

    @kevinc1593

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@edheldude Your original comment was a reply to Profuse-Penguin where to me you came across that he didn’t deserve someone. That is what I was calling rude. With more context, yes there are a lot of taker than good women, but that can be said for men as well. We’ve been conditioned to have to play a “game” and that to me is where the problem steams from.

  • @jdcohen7688

    @jdcohen7688

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@edheldude 😂😂😂

  • @ozzycortes
    @ozzycortes2 жыл бұрын

    Never accept someone back into your life. Once it’s over, It’s over! Just move on.

  • @thethoughtfulone4436

    @thethoughtfulone4436

    2 жыл бұрын

    Only a Sith deals in absolutes.

  • @rascal211

    @rascal211

    Жыл бұрын

    Take her back but tell her your options are now also open to meeting someone else too. Make her know there is a price that she has to pay now and if she's not ok with that forget her.

  • @kevinmalone3210

    @kevinmalone3210

    Жыл бұрын

    @@thethoughtfulone4436 LOL. Quote from Obi Won Knobi.

  • @whitneyerwin9772

    @whitneyerwin9772

    Жыл бұрын

    @@rascal211 now all the females can take your advice. Lol

  • @finnessejets4231

    @finnessejets4231

    Жыл бұрын

    @@rascal211 or you just don’t respond. She aint going to accept her not being “the one”.

  • @TheJasmincika
    @TheJasmincika6 ай бұрын

    They rarely come back because they see how good you are. Usually somebody dumped them and they want use you..

  • @JamesTrouten-gf1zm
    @JamesTrouten-gf1zm9 ай бұрын

    Reason they come back it's because they spent the time on thought and their emotions and have recalculated what they have done wrong so they come back with sympathy and hopefully the one that they're coming to recognizes the sympathy.❤

  • @boutiqueofflowers

    @boutiqueofflowers

    8 ай бұрын

    Thank you. This is true

  • @FlamingCockatiel

    @FlamingCockatiel

    6 ай бұрын

    This is very nicely written; I like that you recognize that growth is possible so that you can enjoy one another's presence.

  • @Karll541

    @Karll541

    4 ай бұрын

    Yes, some people put in the effort to do work on themselves and do self reflection so the second time around is better. Sometimes it takes a break up to inspire growth

  • @Drgluee
    @Drgluee2 жыл бұрын

    Yes.. The fact that they can just leave you with no cares given to find someone else, fail, and just comeback, means they only care about what you provide, and not you. You're not a car to be test driven and then returned to the dealership.

  • @nathanielola3462
    @nathanielola34622 жыл бұрын

    She rejected me, and when she came back, I made her taste her own medicine, and I'm so happy seeing her crying,

  • @notboutit888

    @notboutit888

    12 күн бұрын

    😂😭🤣

  • @Cobraguy-bq4gu
    @Cobraguy-bq4gu Жыл бұрын

    None of the women that rejected me came back to me however that’s something I could live with.

  • @josezerpa8177
    @josezerpa817710 ай бұрын

    This is such a great video , Courtney! This is why is so important for men to have a strong frame from the very beginning. Setting clear boundaries and expectations is crucial to minimizing these silly games. If she notices a man's lack of options of weaknesses, she will come back everytime things don't go her way. Let her know that you have your own life and dont need a woman to be happy, and if she decides to leave you just open the door for her. If a man doesn't respect himself, nobody will.

  • @homiesenatep
    @homiesenatep2 жыл бұрын

    I always despised it when women try to get after you once they see that you're taken, they should never be given a second chance. If you become rich and successful, go after a woman that's on your league, or stay with the one that's been with you since you were nothing

  • @gavinwatschke9179
    @gavinwatschke91792 жыл бұрын

    Remember, the best negotiating position is being able to walk away, never look back, and mean it.

  • @tomahawk8890

    @tomahawk8890

    Жыл бұрын

    Corey Wayne? Love that guy

  • @dd81807
    @dd8180711 ай бұрын

    If you like someone and they like you back then be with them. Do not overthink or over analyze and best to not play stupid games. Life is short so be with someone who appreciates you. I think people have too much information overload. No one is perfect and most of us are not even close to being perfect. This girl is not a mature human being, don’t play stupid games, each case is different, may be they came back to you because they realized you were indeed the best person they have ever dated, be appreciative of that, especially if you still like the person.

  • @qbik911
    @qbik911 Жыл бұрын

    Never tell people to settle down for less, because that's where stopping starts! Absolutely nothing wrong with not being happy with what you have and keep on looking. If i didn't got out from toxic/abusive relationship I was in, I would hanged my self long time go. If your body/mind/soul tells you to move on on daily basis its probably a good indicator that something is definitely wrong. Also, only YOU can judge how good is your partner for you! Dont listen to anyone, because you are the one who will have to deal with that person for the rest of your life. Be yourself, listen to your self, act on your own behalf. Cheers!

  • @MS-dy4sz
    @MS-dy4sz Жыл бұрын

    You rock Courtney! Being dumped sucks. They did you a favor 😉 Leave the past in the past, cry 😭 it off, and take care of yourself. Here's a quote I've seen that is so true: "Stop chasing the wrong one. The right one won't run."

  • @SouljaMan

    @SouljaMan

    Жыл бұрын

    They may run for a while actually….

  • @geronimo67

    @geronimo67

    Жыл бұрын

    "Stop chasing the wrong one. The right one won't run." I love that!

  • @user-xu4xj2cd2j

    @user-xu4xj2cd2j

    11 ай бұрын

    No such thing as the right person, no ones perfect and effort is needed on both sides unfortunately people don't want to put the effort in

  • @terceldude

    @terceldude

    10 ай бұрын

    no such thing as "the right one"

  • @bigboss6867

    @bigboss6867

    8 ай бұрын

    No man ever steps in the same river twice, for it's not the same river and he's not the same man.

  • @thewhitewolf7241
    @thewhitewolf72412 жыл бұрын

    If someone rejected you. They did so for a reason. That reason doesn’t change. And never settle for being someone’s second choice…that just means they are still looking for their first choice.

  • @emmanueldeleon3074
    @emmanueldeleon30746 ай бұрын

    This is wonderful. It makes me mentally stronger through the different options on “what we could possibly do, or how we could deal with different situations.” Thanks, Courtney.

  • @MrSunturion
    @MrSunturion Жыл бұрын

    That advice (Focus on yourself and Achieve your OWN goals and let HER see that). Is the BEST advice that I've gotten, since being Single again. I broke up with my Ex this past December, so at the moment. I just want to be alone and focus on what I want to accomplish for MYSELF. I'll focus on finding somebody else, afterwards.

  • @mikeg3439
    @mikeg3439 Жыл бұрын

    Worst mistake I made in my life was accepting the advances of a girl who rejected me before. Never do it. They will treat you with disdain, even if they cover it up well at first. The truth eventually comes out, "you are lucky just to even have me with you," type statements.

  • @TRUTHaintHATING

    @TRUTHaintHATING

    3 ай бұрын

    Yea that's what imma do. I had a girl I knew that I sent her flowers n stuff and would of called off the wedding if she wanted to be with me. So she said I'm a good friend and don't wanna be in a relationship. And gave my flowers to her co worker. So I moved on got myself to stop liking her. So that happened 2years ago. So today she had a pop-up business with vendors there and she wanted me to come. So I went to support it was her and 3 other ladies that was vendors there. And she was saying how there's no nice guys anymore and no one brings females flowers no more. I didn't react I paid for my shit n left. She tried to follow me out but I told her to have a good weekend. I had to find this video from Courtney

  • @r.walker7986
    @r.walker7986 Жыл бұрын

    People are not always ready to be in relationships at the same time. Plenty of people can't make it work due t lack of maturity, work schedules, unhealed trauma, etc. Someone who admits that they are not in the right place or they are not in a place where they can return your feelings or effort are a blessing because they free you to find someone who is. No need to be bitter about it as long as they go about it in an upfront manner. Some people are in a building stage and when they are done sometimes feel more equipped later and come back if the feelings were real.

  • @Pableras-sl1cz

    @Pableras-sl1cz

    10 ай бұрын

    this described my ex

  • @paulsell2438
    @paulsell2438 Жыл бұрын

    Be with someone that will work with you through the hard times, that's how you grow together stronger

  • @realtalk4994
    @realtalk499411 ай бұрын

    If you get dumped, understand that relationship ended for a reason, and it should likely stay that way. Same goes when you're doing the dumping... there's no universal rule for this but VERY rarely does it work when exes get back together. And much more often it ends up being worse than the first time.

  • @metalmouth0413
    @metalmouth04132 жыл бұрын

    If someone can't stand beside me during a struggle, they ain't gonna stand by me during success. Thus, I'm not an option, not an upgrade, not a downgrade, and not a consumable.

  • @elisabethkarner1434
    @elisabethkarner1434 Жыл бұрын

    Another point is, they always come back but never according to your timing. Sometimes the universe brings them back to see if you learned your lessons... The only point of a bad breakup is to ask yourself: what have I learned from this experience so I don't have to repeat the same stuff over and over again.

  • @Killakiwikutter
    @Killakiwikutter Жыл бұрын

    This was all so essential to dive into atm, thank you! I've been in 2 major relationships, tht ended pretty abruptly. I don't think either of us were developmentally ready for the commitments the it required. Relationship A. for example, ended w/ there was a lot of mixed factors to this, but distance was expressed as a means to grow and broaden our stance. Cool. Wasn't a first for us, and I strongly believe--- them not being able to find better, was a huge factor in their return. Myself included tho, I'll own that. Our relationship was in a bind and we kept resorting to unconscious resolutions. Later they'd reemerge, naturally... So then, relationship B, ended and there hasn't been much communication since. Definitely a relationship where we both needed to flourish more before committing seriously. I did hear from the grapevines how much better he's doing. Even though, a lot of it led him to be a little self-destructive. I thought about reaching out to aid things, but I thought I'd just complicate things. He had found himself in pretty tough places, mentally, physically and emotionally. So, I commemorate him for standing his ground on this... but yea, I've been resorted to being a steppingstone to further along a lottt of men in my past. As I'm usually the more attractive from my partners, it's opened the doors for more options for them. And eventually, no matter the quality of the chemistry.. get tossed to the side. Our relationship would hit major road blocks (for whatever reason) and then I became more or less the less desirable option. More than a few times this has happened. I started to think I was doing something wrong multiple times.. in alot of this, we were extremely young. And naive as hell. It's ok though because it's reformed my standards.

  • @TheAttractionTriggers
    @TheAttractionTriggers5 ай бұрын

    *It is not our purpose to become each other; it is to recognize each other, to learn to see the other and honor him for what he is.*

  • @Man_Cave
    @Man_Cave Жыл бұрын

    I once dated a very honest woman and she was good at answering these questions. I asked her why x GF's always try to come back once you've found somebody. Her response was simple and to the point. "Because a woman wants what another woman wants, and women are very competitive." Best answer I ever heard on that score.

  • @victorymelisa5058

    @victorymelisa5058

    Жыл бұрын

    My ex come back to me few days ago❤ I got help from a relationship Restorer Dr Ezekiel who was able to mend back my broken 💔 relationship and make my ex to come back and beg for second chance.He can bring your ex back..

  • @surasmitameher

    @surasmitameher

    Жыл бұрын

    Don't take her word for that. That'z not woman, that's insecure people with no real self love behavior. I do not care, and I have never went back to someone. I have asked one of my exes about how they are doing because I genuinely cared. Your ex was a low life, lets leave it at that.

  • @Man_Cave

    @Man_Cave

    Жыл бұрын

    @@surasmitameher You're right about one thing. My X was a low life, but the woman who told me that was not my X. She never played that game with me. She merely explained it to me.

  • @surasmitameher

    @surasmitameher

    Жыл бұрын

    @Man Cave A world full of people, with different perspectives. If I see my ex with someone else, no way in hell I am even talking to them. A human isn't a property. And that girl who said what ever she said, 2 of my exes have done the same. It's about people, different way of thinking, no way represents women in general.

  • @Man_Cave

    @Man_Cave

    Жыл бұрын

    @@surasmitameher I don't recall saying, at any point, that a human being was property. Don't put words into my mouth.

  • @alex3776
    @alex37762 жыл бұрын

    Happened to me as well Courtney. For 3 years I've been trying to attract the girl I liked but she ultimately rejected me. The next year, I have taken care of myself like my body, diet, grades and suddenly she came back. I directly said NO not interested 😂

  • @JoseDiaz-rd9fh

    @JoseDiaz-rd9fh

    2 жыл бұрын

    You can't negotiate desire you don't try for that long. Time is much better spent building yourself up.

  • @gargoyliangaming6556

    @gargoyliangaming6556

    2 жыл бұрын

    Hope you'll never waste ur time like that ever again. Focus on TMH ,ur health n finance. Everything else will come in due time.

  • @VicsLetsPlayTeam

    @VicsLetsPlayTeam

    2 жыл бұрын

    Her loss youre win good job stay trong stay safe 👍👏

  • @gorillafamily9299

    @gorillafamily9299

    2 жыл бұрын

    3yrs? This is the wildest girl chase I've heard since I knew women have pussy ... Bruv don't ever go down that road again 3yrs is a long fuccing time mate , she's not the only woman in the world , there's lots of them better than her and willing ..... I personally within the first week of talking and flirting and isn't looking promising , I'm gone, disappear in thin air and she'll never hear a word from me again

  • @LonjeMarie7

    @LonjeMarie7

    2 жыл бұрын

    This made me smile good for you!

  • @NoName-zb1gm
    @NoName-zb1gm Жыл бұрын

    If you're with her for 5 years and she breaks up and then wants to come back then definitely no. But I read this as being rejected early on and then she changes her mind. I think this is fairly common. Remember it takes men 8 seconds to fall in love and it takes women 15 days to fall in love so maybe she needs more time. So when we ask a girl out after 8 seconds she's probably not ready yet.

  • @rjakob8073
    @rjakob80739 ай бұрын

    Once the man/women leave the relationship, never reconnect with this person. You are playing with fire!

  • @whatislife6988
    @whatislife69882 жыл бұрын

    Yeah my ex literally started stalking me cause she dumped me and after 3 weeks started texting me "I miss you and you were honestly the best thing in my life. Just wanted you to know that." She showed up at my house when I wasn't home, then she showed up at my work cause she thought I was dead or something. Then she saw me at a restaurant and had her friend come up to me and said "you're an evil person for ignoring her!". But she was the one who dumped me! This was the same girl who absolutely despised me by the time we broke up, and just by kind of disappearing for whatever reason she couldn't handle it.

  • @dante-qt9sb

    @dante-qt9sb

    2 жыл бұрын

    lmaooo, the usual concept of being portrayed as the perpetrator when you know your worth.

  • @aquapointbeshoy2736

    @aquapointbeshoy2736

    2 жыл бұрын

    That sucks. But part of being a man is having the ability to be blamed over something you didn’t do and still move forward. You’re solid brother keep your head up

  • @emptysoul2757

    @emptysoul2757

    2 жыл бұрын

    Walk way and never look back

  • @Jon-ly6xe

    @Jon-ly6xe

    2 жыл бұрын

    Fr that's some BS same thing happened to me.

  • @zalamael

    @zalamael

    2 жыл бұрын

    Sounds like you dodged a bullet with that one mate. I had an ex years ago who dumped me, and ignored me every time she saw me. That is, up until she saw me with a new girlfriend (who was hotter than her). She came over and sat with my friends (who were also friends with her), and was all friendly and nice, pretending that every time she had ignored me over the previous months never happened etc. In reality, her ego had taken a hit because she liked the idea of me pining over her, and when she realised I was over her and with someone else (someone hotter), she needed my validation. I knew what she was doing of course, so I had a bit of fun at her expense, just to fuck with her ego a bit more. Saying that, I was in my early 20s at the time, so I wasn't really that mature, so getting revenge was enjoyable.

  • @elitefitness341
    @elitefitness3412 жыл бұрын

    It's amazing. I have buddies ask me this all the time! My answer is always the same. #1 They cast the "fishing line" to see if you're still "on the hook" as a possible "option". #2 They simply just want attention to feel better about themselves. #3 They want to see what they can get out of you. #4 In RARE circumstances, depending on the health of the relationship and reasons for breaking up, they legitimately miss you and want to give it another shot. Why people can't understand these things is beyond me.

  • @desertsn0wball

    @desertsn0wball

    2 жыл бұрын

    because it's hard to tell the difference between genuine and 1 2 and 3

  • @supamanlova9250
    @supamanlova925010 ай бұрын

    Courtney I know you receive an immense amount of messages like this and this is a 1 year old video, but your perspective on life and relationships is the healthiest I've ever seen from a woman and it's a pleasure to listen to. You're great. We need more women like you in this world. Not in like a simp way ha ha. Best from the UK

  • @bigboss6867
    @bigboss68678 ай бұрын

    36 year old guy here, and I just want to say Courtney that I wish I had found your channel last year after my Ex dumped me. Gave her three years of my life only for her to dump me for a cop-out reason. She gave me the whole, "Oh, I still want to be friends, but it's gonna be a while before I'm ready to talk again." I cancelled her check and removed her from my social media. I've finally understood that her and I as a couple was never in the cards. Whatever attraction she had for me has long since faded and I wasted so much time and energy pining after her because that's what guys are supposed to do in the movies. What a fool I've been.

  • @FIREdMoN-dx4kt

    @FIREdMoN-dx4kt

    3 ай бұрын

    did she ever reach out to you ? i am kinda in the same boat

  • @bigboss6867

    @bigboss6867

    3 ай бұрын

    @@FIREdMoN-dx4kt Been over a year and nothing, I've started dating again and haven't reached out or anything.

  • @bigboss6867

    @bigboss6867

    2 ай бұрын

    @@FIREdMoN-dx4kt Nah, and to be honest I don't care anymore if she does or doesn't reach out.

  • @moetube74
    @moetube742 жыл бұрын

    Yes. I've experience the woman coming back when you find someone else a couple of times. I had a girl I was really interested in that put me in the "friend zone" all of a sudden become very interested when I got a girlfriend. I also had an ex who started contacting me after we hadn't really spoken to each other in about three years, when she found out I was engaged. SMH.

  • @sebastianplatt6815

    @sebastianplatt6815

    2 жыл бұрын

    We call this tale “Damn he got away”

  • @karatsurba4791

    @karatsurba4791

    2 жыл бұрын

    Thanks for sharing your experience. Could you elaborate what u meant by coming back. Is it coming back to wish u the best & having casual friendly conversations OR is it coming back to getting back together as partners ? Could you say what signalled the intentions?

  • @moetube74

    @moetube74

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@karatsurba4791 The first young lady I mentioned called a couple of times and during one of our conversations basically told me that I didn't pursue her hard enough when I was interested in her which is why we aren't together. Trust me she knew how I felt when I was interested. It took a lot of self control not to cuss her out and hang up on her. The second young lady called me multiple times before I got married and asked if I was sure if it was what I wanted. This a person who previously had decided three years earlier that she didn't want to date anymore and basically wanted to see what else was out there. We literally had not spoken since. Then out of the blue she started calling me right after I had become engaged. She even called again after I got married. Needless to say Wifey was very pissed when that happened.

  • @justsomebird4285

    @justsomebird4285

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@moetube74 Yeah you were just an option to the both of them and they wanted to mess around and not have to commit to anything serious till it was finally time. Meanwhile you found a woman that understands you have to be willing to commit sooner rather than later for it to go the distance and have something REAL. Good for you.

  • @CourtneyRyan

    @CourtneyRyan

    2 жыл бұрын

    Thank you for sharing this!

  • @mukul215
    @mukul215 Жыл бұрын

    I had a very very bad fight after 6 years of very close friendship. I went back to her within a week of fighting. Not because I didnt find anyone better (which is the truth, TBH) but because I knew she had been there for me when others werent. Because the fight / friendship break-up happened not because of cheating but because we had started viewing life and values differently. But a lot of people put this same advice into her ear: never accept someone who returns. So i believe, this advice should not be taken literally. It should be applied on a case to case basis.

  • @didamnesia3575

    @didamnesia3575

    Жыл бұрын

    Within a week isn't really what the subject is though. We're talking months or years later

  • @Paul_Wetor

    @Paul_Wetor

    10 ай бұрын

    Yes, these "rules" are more like warnings. There can be a good reason to reconcile.

  • @ww21943
    @ww21943 Жыл бұрын

    Do they always come back? no. Does it happen sometimes, yes. There was a woman at work (yes, work is not the best place for this) that I saw often. We talked, laughed, and got to know each other. One day I asked if she wanted to come with my brother and I to a museum in NYC. I figured I was already going and it’s not necessarily a date. Had a great time. All the signs were there. We we’re flirtatious since that day. She dropped hints about wanting to go to a place we passed on our way to the city. I tried to make plans and she flaked out a couple of times. So I backed off. Then after a week or so she was all over my DMs and suggested going out that weekend. The day before she dropped something to the effect of “I don’t want to misinterpret things, we are going out as friends.” At this point I didn’t want to go out with her the next day. I’m fine with friends but I’m not taking you out or doing date things. I showed up like an hour late the next day 😂. I didn’t care at that point. After that I wouldn’t text first anymore. I avoided going to where I knew should would be at work. But when I saw her I was still nice and joked around and all. Then months later another coworker said something like “oh she’s worried you like her and she doesn’t know how to let you down.” I laughed because by that point I was never initiating conversations, didn’t hang out with her since that one day, and I rarely saw her. I knew she missed my attention. Eventually one day we ended up at the same table eating lunch and she kept trying to broach why I don’t reach out and all. I was straight up with her. I also called out the whole “let me down thing.” She admitted that she knew that wasn’t the case and it probably made her feel like she has control over the situation. I don’t think she was used to being let down. She’s prob a 4 on a 1-10 so that’s telling you something about guys today. After that we’ve been fine. She’ll bring up hanging out like to go out dancing. I usually answer “find me a date and I’ll go.” I spent so many years being conciliatory and just weak with women. It finally clicked. I got what taking the lead meant for example. I also realized the power of rejection. I’m not trying to manipulate. She’s made it clear she’s not interested in anything more and I made it clear that I’m really not interested in giving my attention to someone that isn’t looking for the same thing. At this point even if she wanted to go out on a date, I already lost interest.

  • @-Paul__
    @-Paul__5 ай бұрын

    thank you for this video , it just gave me a massive perspective to not make a fool of myself and to not text her for the last time to have my say. id rather walk away with my dignity now

  • @Psychology299
    @Psychology2992 жыл бұрын

    If someone disrespected you and didn't care about you after you showed them how much you love them. Then just delete them and block them. Cut all ties. It's much better for your mental health.

  • @alexmcelroy6783

    @alexmcelroy6783

    Жыл бұрын

    Disrespecting a partner who has shown genuine love and support for you is a reflection of how you treat or feel about yourself. People who respect themselves respect others. That means communicating effectively and sticking with their decisions.

  • @shoelacedonkey

    @shoelacedonkey

    5 ай бұрын

    @Psychology299 your channel is hilarious.

  • @Psychology299

    @Psychology299

    5 ай бұрын

    Thanks for the feedback LMAO@@shoelacedonkey

  • @alabar9795
    @alabar97952 жыл бұрын

    The answer is two or 3 things 1 She was intrested in another guy she views as better than you. 2 she broke up with the new guy and your an easy rebound. 3 she see's hears your doing well and now appear to be better than the guy she left

  • @iainparsons9788
    @iainparsons97882 ай бұрын

    Hi again Courtney! You are my new favorite therapist!! I don't know what your professional training is, but your powers of observation are awesome! I fall under the category of "Couldn't find anything better". I got a new job in a different state and she wanted her freedom. Then she re-enlisted for a new duty station 1200 miles away. I was done. We had been back and for for a few years and I finally manned up and said "no". And filed for divorce. Two months later she was back looking for a do over. UNABLE. I ended up meeting the best woman I have ever met and we've been married 37 years.

  • @nathan2813
    @nathan2813 Жыл бұрын

    Yes, I've experienced this time and time again throughout my life (and am experiencing it now). When a woman sees another member of her social group is attracted to you, they ALL become attracted to you. Kind of like how their periods tend to synchronize! :oD

  • @georgespangler1517
    @georgespangler15172 жыл бұрын

    Don't ever take someone back that left you,, love yourself enough not to

  • @heatherstacy2976
    @heatherstacy29762 жыл бұрын

    I've learned that you should never give someone like this the benefit of the doubt. They will act like "the prize" the entire time instead of being happy that you gave them a second chance. They will eventually reject you again (usually after using you for whatever pathetic validation they need at the time). Know your value and don't settle.

  • @execerziafitness1676

    @execerziafitness1676

    Жыл бұрын

    You are right Heather!!

  • @TheMuncherTen
    @TheMuncherTen Жыл бұрын

    why are you so smart and wise courtney, i love the actual understanding about commitment its unfortunate many people are so wishy washy with it

  • @Rick.Alan.6622
    @Rick.Alan.66225 ай бұрын

    Married 30 years but currently separated. I'll continue to work on me but I will never cheat and take my vows very seriously. Keep working on you. It's the best self care you can do. ❤

  • @Dan_the_Cobbler
    @Dan_the_Cobbler2 жыл бұрын

    I think it can be tricky sometimes, personally i've fell into the grass is greener trap and lost a partner due to it. Afterwards I realised what I had lost with her and that i was being shallow, but also human and it's something I need to work on, but when I wanted her back I wanted her back for the right reasons, realising my mistakes etc rather than settling for her.

  • @dalewetzel3029

    @dalewetzel3029

    2 жыл бұрын

    “I know that sounds messed up, because, quite frankly, it is.” Gold. Thanks again for the honest commentary.

  • @CourtneyRyan

    @CourtneyRyan

    2 жыл бұрын

    Thanks for sharing this 🙌🏼 appreciate it

  • @Dan_the_Cobbler

    @Dan_the_Cobbler

    2 жыл бұрын

    @Evidence-Based Health UK get a grip you have no idea what our situation was pal

  • @Dan_the_Cobbler

    @Dan_the_Cobbler

    2 жыл бұрын

    @Evidence-Based Health UK and that means I treated her like garbage? Absolutely not, it means I’m man enough to admit my flaws and realise my own internal issues that led me to feel unsatisfied. Are you perfect?

  • @manic6030

    @manic6030

    2 жыл бұрын

    Same story here. I wrote her a message (and apologised) but I don't think I'll have an answer.

  • @dancornell7171
    @dancornell71712 жыл бұрын

    Wow Courtney, this video is one of *BEST* ones you've ever posted; it so happens that what you described is exactly what happened to me recently. She left me a month ago and now she wants to come back, because I played it cool and told her that I'll be fine no matter what she decides to do. Of course internally I've been bleeding and hurting, but did not let it show. And this is the only way, guys. If you go crawling to her on your knees, begging and clawing, she will despise you. Mom taught me well, and I listened, took her advice; and IT WORKS!

  • @scottstone1475

    @scottstone1475

    Жыл бұрын

    Great job brother...i hope it all works for you..im going through a break up after 23 years.. Sucks. But I'm holding strong.

  • @prab984

    @prab984

    Жыл бұрын

    💯Best video of her ever

  • @mrbb.business7281
    @mrbb.business72818 ай бұрын

    Choosing a partner like they are shopping is easy to do but it also promotes devaluing the person you are hoping to commit to and deeply love.

  • @pedronunes8766
    @pedronunes8766 Жыл бұрын

    All super true… in my opinion don’t let them back. Respect yourself!

  • @agentm83
    @agentm832 жыл бұрын

    I appreciate the down-to-Earth and balanced takes from women that we get from channels like this one. As a guy we normally just get the male perspectives on this type of stuff, so it's good to have some balance.

  • @markquinn1216

    @markquinn1216

    2 жыл бұрын

    The female advice is worthless dude. If you follow it you will become a simp.

  • @tycoon650

    @tycoon650

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@markquinn1216 facts you don’t ask the fish how to catch a fish you ask the fishermen

  • @marte1376

    @marte1376

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@tycoon650 yes but we're not fishes, we're humans

  • @marte1376

    @marte1376

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@markquinn1216 yet you're here watching her, if you have nothing good to add, don't bother. Go and be envious elsewhere. Seriously, a person just shares his thoughts and compliments on the work of a person does and you go insane. What a mediocre way of living

  • @markquinn1216

    @markquinn1216

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@marte1376 Don't get all emotional lady.

  • @sepchabock5549
    @sepchabock55492 жыл бұрын

    The never being satisfied in a relationship , and always looking for a better option is the truest true ever

  • @stankyrandy
    @stankyrandy10 ай бұрын

    Your background music is so soothing! Thank you for that! Great content!

  • @thisdyingsoul76
    @thisdyingsoul763 ай бұрын

    When my ex left, I told her there was no coming back if she walked out the door. I am positive she regretted the decision to leave within weeks; but I had already moved on. When I said there was no coming back, I meant it. If after 18 years, I was unable to make her happy, I was done trying. I realized real fast that I was better off without her and if that feeling wasn't mutual, she would have to live with the consequences of her decision.

  • @yvesgysel9834
    @yvesgysel9834 Жыл бұрын

    It's not that she really wants you back. She just can not stand the fact, that you have moved on, without making any fuss. In the past, my ex girlfriend broke it up. Being me, I just walked away, wishing her the best, showing no emotions, remaining very calm. 2 days later she called me crying and that we needed to talk and that I never must have loved her, because otherwise I would not have left her that easy. At that time, I did not understand her at all. After all she ended it. Never take her back. Never.

  • @AnthonyChinaski
    @AnthonyChinaski2 жыл бұрын

    They want you and get you when you’re at the top and then berate you and leave when you’re at the bottom. Now, I want to find someone who is happy with who I am at the bottom. Things will get better for me regardless of my relationship status and only someone who accepts and wants me at my worse will be there for me if I ever go through trying times, again.

  • @scrubhero3629

    @scrubhero3629

    2 жыл бұрын

    Hard to find, but worth it

  • @whitneyerwin9772

    @whitneyerwin9772

    Жыл бұрын

    I think most people want that, but I can't speak for everyone.

  • @johnsonyamanguchi9397
    @johnsonyamanguchi9397 Жыл бұрын

    Thank you for the great informative and educational information advise. I know better than my reactions for all the times i neglect my intuition, i let my ego get the best of me. Thanks again! ✌

  • @ranmckalser9844
    @ranmckalser9844 Жыл бұрын

    i love your advice, so wholesome and wise. You got me through my breakup. I'm dating a healthier woman. Thank you

  • @michaelm001
    @michaelm0012 жыл бұрын

    I was with a woman that cheated on me repeatedly. I was clearly her second choice but didn’t realize it at the time. I wish I had. She only wanted to be with me when the guy she really wanted didn’t want her. Thanks for the advice and perspective on this issue. It helps!

  • @lorenzobongiovanni3376

    @lorenzobongiovanni3376

    Жыл бұрын

    And i hear people say tate is misogynistic while such tangible shit happens because some self entitled h** does it

  • @quentinbarker7290

    @quentinbarker7290

    Жыл бұрын

    That happens then when you try to move on they regret they cant have you. They cannot love unconditional. If she couldn't see it or wasted time move on. Women will secretly spend decades with your enemies like 'liking' you is a prize while they ingest your enemies nut.

  • @fml5910

    @fml5910

    Жыл бұрын

    I have known a woman about 11 years now.She told me last year over the phone she loves me, but she don't love me. I told her I always treated her with respect, and her boundaries. Told her I really liked her, and she brings joy to my life, and I enjoy her company. I told her she became my best friend over time. She said we have a good friendship, and I was always there for her. Yet she would get mad if I dare touched her, or tried to hold hands, kiss her, touch her back, etc.... She was introduced to a older, disabled guy 4 months ago, he walks with a cane. I'm no 10 but I'm way more attractive than he is.He told me he went on medicaid or medicare when he turned 65. He looks 70 easy, maybe older my friend is 61. I met him for the 1st time about 2 weeks ago.I was shocked to say the least,I'm thinking there is no way she is having sex with him. We were sitting on chairs outside listening to a band. after 2 hours or so he is holding her hand for like 5 minutes.They had to rub it in my face that they were together, didn't care about my feelings.I was like wow he has no guilt about it either, and she told him we been friends for 10 years.I was so mad. The next day she calls me, and was wondering what was wrong with me. She told me they were having sex, he's not her boyfriend but more like a friend with benefits.I left so they could go to a bar and be alone with each other. She asked me if I was going to join them,I told her no. I so much felt like going and then put my arm around her to see if that asshole would have done anything, she would have been pissed.We talked maybe 45 minutes, I let her have it, and told her how much she hurt me, and even in the past.I said to her how would you feel if I did that to you with another woman in front of you. She said she would be happy for me, which I doubt, I know she would have been jealous.And probably be thinking I must be a good catch. She expected a hug from me the same night we went to see a band. I'm like really? Didn't give her a hug, got in my car, and went home. She tells me after all this she still wants to be friends with me, hang out, and do things together.They both showed they're true colors. I lost a lot of respect for her, and have none for him either. But now I'm moving her way down the list, like she did to me. I asked her if she told him she had been friends with me for over 10 years.She said she did.I think he is a selfish asshole too. He told me his wife died, I'm thinking my friend probably is the 1st woman he had sex with since he had sex with his wife. I figure he's going to get as much sex from her as he can. I'm sure no other women have been interested in him.I don't know what the hell is wrong with my friend she easily can get a better looking guy closer to her age. Yet he had the nerve to act like I was below him, and he was with her.If I was him I wouldn't have done that to him if I just knew her 4 months, and knew he her for over 10 years.

  • @scottfx182
    @scottfx1822 жыл бұрын

    My parents dated in HS, this was the 1950's and my dad graduated and went into the Army. They broke up shortly before he went into the Army. I think they just realized that they were young and it was High School and he was going to be away, perhaps for years. Mom ran into my dad five years after they broke up but that was all it took. Both had experienced a lot of personal growth between the ages of 17 and 22. My dad came back after his service and was dating someone else, my mom was engaged to someone at the time She admits that he was always her first love and when she saw him again all those feelings came flooding back. I guess for him too because he broke it off with his girlfriend and my mom broke her engagement too. Was she looking for a better deal? Perhaps but truth be told the heart wants what the heart wants and they didn't have two nickels to rub together when they got married. They started life practically from zero and built one together. The guy my mom was engaged to came from a family that had money so it wasn't hypergamy that drove mom's decision I would have to say it was love pure and simple. In the end, they were married for almost 50 years. That was a different era I guess. The only situation I would think is viable to take someone back is through personal growth. Once you are past High School or College and you are an adult there is no circumstance I would take back anyone that rejected me. An old HS or College girlfriend may be the only exception if the reasons for parting were by mutual agreement that the timing was not right. It sounds harsh but I would never allow anyone that cheated or monkey branched on me back into my life no matter how sorry they claimed to be.

  • @urmomsfavtoy1159

    @urmomsfavtoy1159

    Жыл бұрын

    Dawg I think you're talking about The Notebook right now.

  • @mikeingeorgia1

    @mikeingeorgia1

    Жыл бұрын

    Isn’t that called “pair bonding”?

  • @uranianka

    @uranianka

    Жыл бұрын

    What a beautiful love story! 😍👏

  • @checharles5224

    @checharles5224

    Жыл бұрын

    Her body count was Lilly 1 or 2 so she had the capacity to bond already pair bonded to your dad

  • @THEDIFFERENTONE2104
    @THEDIFFERENTONE2104 Жыл бұрын

    THAT WAS SOO PRECIOUS MAAM. THANK YOU FOR THIS HIGH VALUE INFORMATION.

  • @Layerlol
    @Layerlol4 ай бұрын

    People that keep chasing something better unfortunately end up with nothing in the end. Be careful with those kind of people, I fell in love with one and it was not a good feeling and it took alot for me to get over that person

  • @msbae
    @msbae2 жыл бұрын

    Doesn't matter why they want to come back. They won't be welcome. There are no second chances.

  • @emilemurdock
    @emilemurdock2 жыл бұрын

    I had one come back and talk to me after initially rejecting me. We were at a party and she saw me talking to another girl and to quote her, “she got extremely jealous”. An important note though is that she told me that she didn’t have feelings for me, I said okay and bye. 2 weeks later I got the I miss you text and can we talk text. We talked, she said she had feelings. It was by far the most turbulent emotional period in my life. We’re not dating btw, I was still the second choice after all that

  • @tajayi78

    @tajayi78

    2 жыл бұрын

    Get rid of your boat and she will go for the next fisherman___patrice O neal .

  • @murphtv.

    @murphtv.

    2 ай бұрын

    Rejecting a girl that rejected you first first is the best win. NEVER LET A FEMALE GET A SECOND CHANCE. your worth more

  • @dpatterson9540
    @dpatterson95409 ай бұрын

    Some people are just never mean't to be or they don't deserve you. Once a breakup, find someone else.

  • @jacegallagher8589
    @jacegallagher85892 жыл бұрын

    I'm very firm in my belief that once a relationship ends it should stay that way. It ended for a reason and taking an ex back is like trying to put poop back in your body after expelling it. Both times someone returned to me it was only when they realized I was in a new relationship.

  • @Ace.0.0.0.

    @Ace.0.0.0.

    2 жыл бұрын

    I wish I hadn't read that.

  • @robogreek3157

    @robogreek3157

    2 жыл бұрын

    Thats a HORRIBLE analogy. 😆 😆 wtf... 😆 😆 😆

  • @rjharrold2907

    @rjharrold2907

    Жыл бұрын

    @@robogreek3157 eugghghhhh right

  • @StockyDude

    @StockyDude

    Жыл бұрын

    I love that analogy 😂

  • @jpowell2603

    @jpowell2603

    Жыл бұрын

    Great analogy man! Poop comes out let it out! I like that.

  • @Faithandseekerofchrist
    @Faithandseekerofchrist Жыл бұрын

    1. They're back up plan didn't work out as they hoped 2. You're with someone new or you moved on with your life and they sense it 3. They want to play games with you again 4. They want to keep tabs on you 5. Lastly they regret what they did to you and realized what they lost. If you want to get revenge on them the best revenge is living your life the best way possible and never looking back! No it's not getting a new guy and showing him off because that is straight up a rebound and that shows that you have not moved on. It also means YOU have work to do on your part! When you have completely moved on from the ex, then date someone new.

  • @bobsmith962

    @bobsmith962

    Жыл бұрын

    All of the above for me. I kind of rejected her when she tried to get back with me and a few weeks later she was with another guy she'd been seeing for a while. Glad I dodged a bullet

  • @Avoid_Low_Frequency
    @Avoid_Low_Frequency6 ай бұрын

    I love this video and I have had a couple of these things happen to me and I have done a couple of these things. The biggest one that you spoke of is that they came back when I was no longer available and the other is when they saw I had leveled up in my own life. The reason I approached the man I had a few dates with and said I didn’t think we should continue is because he had great qualities and was a good person and at the time I just needed to feel better about the choices I made as I had made some choices that weren’t good. Luckily he saw it the same way.

  • @johnfeminella9839
    @johnfeminella9839 Жыл бұрын

    Your advice always is spot on thanks!

  • @raymondtalbot6104
    @raymondtalbot61042 жыл бұрын

    Trust me boys, when it's over, it's over. DON'T let her come back into your life UNLESS, you are 100% sure that what ended the relationship in the first place, can be FIXED! Or else you will just go "full circle". Coming in contact with an EX may spur back what originally attracted you to her, overlooking what broke up the relationship. That's you ANINAL attraction at work. Think McFly, THINK!

  • @travisjohn5793

    @travisjohn5793

    2 жыл бұрын

    Your shoe is untied..

  • @aronbechiom565
    @aronbechiom5652 жыл бұрын

    If she comes back only after seeing that you're "doing well", reinforces the notion that women "wait at the finish line, and only choose the winner". If she bailed on you, while in your struggles...don't take her back. No matter how successful..or secure you become.

  • @zezeti2246

    @zezeti2246

    7 ай бұрын

    Facts,strongest relationships are those where they got together when they were poor and built together a better life for themselves

  • @realityitis4
    @realityitis45 ай бұрын

    these videos are so good, thank you for posting Courtney Ryan

  • @MegaSilverscorpion
    @MegaSilverscorpion8 ай бұрын

    All I’m saying is if your ex comes running back begging you to take them back for reasons one through five are multiple reasons, do you not and I emphasize DO NOT take them back. There is a chance that they are better emotionally, physically, and mentally, but more than likely they just want something that only you can give. So ladies and gentlemen, respect yourselves, and don’t pay them any time of day.

  • @Iamtemjin
    @Iamtemjin2 жыл бұрын

    I have had people come back after treating like a second class citizen. Let being indifferent. But one thing I’ve noticed is even when I take them back, I don’t feel anything for them anymore nor do we even talk as before. Perfect strangers pretty much.

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