My dear son, you are so open and honest, you can can see by all these wonderful comments, you have so much to offer. You are the best son ever so caring, a fantastic sense of humour, artistic, caring for friends and family, and we are extremely proud of you, much love Mum xxxxx

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

2 жыл бұрын

Thanks Mum - you're awesome ❤✌

@kass_G59

Жыл бұрын

Awww this is so sweet. Your mom is right Freddo!

You are the sweetest person. You made me cry. I lost my son to suicide. He was sweet, like you, and couldn’t handle all of life’s disappointments. I know you are doing well now, because this video is one of your older videos. I’m so glad!

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

6 ай бұрын

Thanks so much! I'm sorry to hear about your son, I had also been in the darkest depths of despair, and luckily I came out the other side to enjoy life to the fullest, but it could have gone the other way. I try to appreciate every day

"Sorry Mom" If I had a dollar for every time I've said that.. Great brain dump! I've been in a wheelchair since I was 22. I didn't have a thing but a duffle bag, hockey skates . Now married, kids, career ... stay out there man and just have fun. Things will come together.

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

2 жыл бұрын

Thanks Shane, much appreciated

Thank You so much for sharing. It is weird, how much comfort and relatable-ness i find in listening to Your stories and feelings. Our lifes are so different, i have no idea, how it is to go through such a traumatic accident with life altering consequences and still i seem to have so similar worries, problems, insecurities, dreams, hopes... I also dream of having a normal life, husband, kids and a job. I also have very recently ended a very long term relationship, (which in my case was very toxic). And now i feel like i have no idea how to date and feel awkward and terrified to even try. I also have heard from friends, that i should focus on my strengths, my character, and not feel down, just because i don't measure up to the looks of Instagram models. But, when i don't feel anywhere close to being feminine or attractive, then it is really hard to feel hopeful about my prospects of finding a husband. I also have felt like i have been "friendzoned" because of my physical body. I also have been living in a foreign country for many years, where, although people have complimented my language skills, i never stopped feeling like fish out of water. (I very recently moved back "home") It is so weird and yet so wonderful to listen to Your story. I am so glad i found Your channel. You brighten my day ! I like how open You seem to sharing all sides of Your experience, no matter - dark or light, hopeful or depressed. I wish You all the best of luck to fulfill all Your dreams and goals !

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

2 жыл бұрын

Wow, such a kind compliment, I'm so glad you resonated with what I said and I'm not alone in these feelings, I guess it's all part of being human, and not exclusive to being in a wheelchair. Thanks! PS. I deleted instagram recently and it has helped my mental health immensely. Comparison is the thief of joy, as the saying goes.

I found this your most interesting vlog Freddo. Here's some random thoughts in no particular order in response to it. 1) Some people will be nice but never really get beyond seeing you as broken while others will see you and what you project differently and maybe more open to dating. But meeting people does require your putting yourself in situations where you can meet them and get beyond the "can I buy you a drink" stage, so keep that in mind when thinking about your career. 2) I think you make light of the challenges you have faced and dealt with since being injured. You have done a lot. Firstly you have had to get to know your new physiology and manage your impairment. Secondly the world outside has been largely designed on the assumption that normality is walking and so you have had to develop work arounds to overcome those barriers. I'd say you've done pretty well given your location :) Lastly in terms of living in the UK all I can say is that I've lived most of my life in South London and its very accessible but not flat. Trains are not very accessible but trams and buses are and I used to drive (up until retirement) to central London to work. One place that is flat and pretty accessible because everything is so close is Portsmouth. Lots goes on there too. I look forward to the next installment.

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

2 жыл бұрын

I'm from Southampton, so I'm familiar with Portsmouth, I also have a few friends there. Could be a possibility. Thanks for all the advice Pete, much appreciated

I found your station after watching the podcast with Empowered Para. Your capacity to experience this range of very human feelings and to stay present to yourself while expressing them here- Well, that’s a strength and a gift to the world.

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

Жыл бұрын

Awww thank you. That’s so kind. I really appreciate you saying that ❤️✌️

Very emotional to watch, stay positive, love you xx

Freddo you are a very attractive man, witty, smart, charismatic, charming, funny, honest and open with your emotions and you’re also a genuine human. Dating is hard for everyone, but if someone can’t see passed your wheelchair then that’s their problem. I’m not the most attractive person but I’ve found someone that doesn’t see my disabilities or my wheelchair he just sees me. It’s incredibly heartbreaking that you are comparing yourself to Lou’s new bf. Just remember you have attributes that someone is looking for, you guys just haven’t found each other yet.

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

2 жыл бұрын

You're right, rejection is tough, wheelchair or not, just not used to it, it's been a while! Comparison is the thief of joy, as they say, I've recently deleted instagram and it's great. Thanks for the kind compliments 😊

@Jaggededge112

2 жыл бұрын

@@morgancalvi6675 yes she does

@Jaggededge112

2 жыл бұрын

@@FreddotheWheelchairGuy I’m not just feeding you compliments I’m being honest. I think it’ll be great for you to start over in the UK, life is easier when you are first able to actually navigate the landscape fairly easily, and when there is no language barrier getting in the way. I hope you’ll find your happiness, you’re a wonderful person that deserves all the happiness.

Dating is super hard for everyone, but I met my partner after his sci and I’m part of a big Facebook community of other wives and girlfriends and the majority of us met after injury. I know it sounds blasé but it’s very true that when the right person comes into your life it won’t matter that you use a wheelchair anymore than it would matter if you any other characteristic. I’ve had 3 previous serious relationships before I met my partner and I can tell you 100% that he is far more of a real man than they ever were. He is honest, supportive, loving, kind etc etc everything a woman could want. You have all those important qualities and you will be valued for them x

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

2 жыл бұрын

Thanks, you're right, dating is hard for everyone, I must remember that. I was just better at it before (I think?) maybe nostalgic memories can be misleading - maybe my expectations were unrealistic. Life is a lesson!

@someonerandom6379

2 жыл бұрын

@@FreddotheWheelchairGuy I think it’s easier when we’re even just a bit younger, less expectations from dating. We look for fun, a good time etc whereas as we mature we start to look to the future, to longer term love and more compatibility. I don’t know you but everyone I do know with an sci has grown as a person since their injury. They are more sensitive, have more depth and personal understanding, a real sense of soul about them……all of which makes them more attractive to most women looking for a life partner. We need to grow from our experiences, it’s definitely not easy, lots of peaks and troughs but you are way ahead of what you expected when you had your accident and the next few years will also bring huge leaps forward. You have so much to offer, try not to be your own harshest critic and the life you want will come in time x

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

2 жыл бұрын

@@someonerandom6379 Great advice, beautifully written, thank you! 😊

Bro, it’s all about having fun in our chairs ! Love will follow

I never would have said this if you hadn't have put this video up but when you changed your name to 'Freddo The Wheelchair Guy' it immediately crossed my mind that that is the absolute last think I would associate you with; in no particular order determined, positive, experimental, driven, honest, open, grateful, funny, creative, interesting, intrested, inspiring (I know you cringe at that one but it's true!), brave all spring to mind. Have you considered you are projecting your own thoughts out there as I'd call you 'Freddo The Wonder-Guy' not the wheelchair guy, you are so much more than that label you have tagged on yourself, food for thought.

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

2 жыл бұрын

You forgot humble 😉 - I changed it to Freddo the Wheelchair Guy so it was easier for people to get what my channel is about and find it easy to remember. It also came about when I started owning my new identity, but I can see how you might think it's a bit limiting, of course I'm way more than the wheelchair guy, but I am also, to be blunt - the wheelchair guy. If there was a picture of loads of people together and someone asked, which one's Freddo? - you get the idea. Anyway - thanks Rach for all the amazing compliments, you are too kind ❤✌

Yes, You are an awesome guy. Thankyou for sharing (oversharing 😉). I agree with all the comments already made about your attributes, of which there are many. I look forward to seeing where life’s adventures take you next. I love your honesty and outlook on life, though maybe less of the magic mushrooms in future. Love and kindness all the way. ✌️ 💕

Thank you for sharing your heart I'm so happy I stayed until the end, you seem to be surrounded by friends that truly love you and that's a testament of the kind and compassionate man that you are!! It shows thru by all the things you said. I PRAY GOD GIVES YOU THE DESIRES OF YOUR HEART. I look forward to one day soon seeing you tell us how you've met your soulmate.

Wonderful vlog. I love your warmth and sharing.

Thank you for your videos, they really help!

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

11 ай бұрын

Thanks for taking the time to comment, it inspires me to keep creating ❤️

@piddiification

11 ай бұрын

Well your videos help a lot. I have a incomplete spinal injury. And getting info from someone you can relate to is golden! So thanks again 🖖

Hej brother, Nice vlog as usual. I could resonate with a lot of that you said. About the lack of self steen, this comes with time, keep on dating (I know dating is horrible) but keep on doing it, keep on putting yourself out there and making yourself available. You may not think so but you have a lot of things on your favor that a non- disabled person don’t have. Resilience, emotional maturity, wisdom, problem solving skills & patience are just to name a few, and I am sure there are plenty of women out there looking for a guys with these set of values. About work and moving, I think it’s a great idea! I know live in a middle size city in south of Sweden and it makes a huge difference in my quality of live. Malmö is completely flat and wheelchair friendly, and also full of accessible activities. So the first thing would be to research a flat mid size Uk 🇬🇧 city, then try to found out about the disability organization/ NGOs located in this city and get yourself involved. Also, choose a city that has a Spinal Rehab center, I can easily see you as a rehab instructor for newly injured folks, you mental strength and personality can help so many! You can do this gig for a few years until you buy yourself more time to find something else. I particularly love doing it still, the work as a mentor is a such meaningful thing and you get so much from it. You can also combined it with something else along the way working part time. Anyways, it is just something to get you started! Best of luck for you man. Let me know if you want to chat. I have felt the same as you and I actually did the whole process of moving city by myself with SCI, finding a job, building community, making new friends, dating and etc. It may sounds scary but trust the process and enjoy the journey man. It’s gonna be exciting times ahead! Stay well. Rod Xx

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

2 жыл бұрын

Great reply man! Yes to all the above! I'd love a job like that, hadn't even thought about it, but working with others who have suffered injuries like this would be great. The thought of moving on my own is scary, maybe we can chat one day! I'll hit you up on instagram for your whatsapp (I've deleted the app for a while, but I'll message you soon) Thanks so much for this message 😁

Epic video. It helped me today. Thank you.

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

Жыл бұрын

Happy to help. I have found things much easier recently since filming this.

you had me laughing threw this whole video..ive bn injured for 30yrs this coming April and your doing very well bro..we all have r crappy days. but how we snap out and do positive things..ya great guy bro things will come to u!!!

Thank you for opening up and sharing with everyone Freddo. Too many people don’t keep it real in the age of social media and just try to create this magazine picture prefect lifestyle that’s not real and only can do more damage than good. Perfect example, your channel. It’s real, it’s raw and it’s not promoting anything it isn’t. We are all human with raw emotions at the end of the day and it’s good to feel alive, good, scared, honest, open and most importantly talk about mental health. Thank you for sharing, going off script, having a mind dump, keeping it real, honest and just being Fred. Keep rolling. Keep the tassels twirling and stay health. Xx ✌️🧑🏻‍🦽 Ps that light show gives Vivid Sydney a real run for its money.

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

2 жыл бұрын

Thanks so much, great to hear feedback like that. I try to be as honest as possible but it’s scary being so vulnerable on a public platform.

@onarolldan

2 жыл бұрын

@@FreddotheWheelchairGuy that’s one of the many things that sets you apart from the rest. You show the vulnerability and consist with your content and it’s realness. Being a paraplegic isn’t glamours. I use to be cabin crew and everything thought I had the most glamorous job in the world. No one would listen to me. It’s not!!!!!! You are only a waiter/clean in a metal can in the sky, sleep deprived with fake smiles. I only wish doing vlogs was a thing when I was flying cause there’s no glamour to the job. Sure I’m grateful I got to travel the world but stay in on city for 24hrs or less during the peak season. You need sleep and food. Keep it real man. Much love. X ✌️🧑🏻‍🦽 Ps life is scary, think of it as keeping us alive and in check. PPS. Your a good egg

Came here from the Charlie and Ben Podcast. Cool to see the face behind the question. You seem like a really cool dude. Glad that you are better now! 😁

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

2 жыл бұрын

Cheers man! Things have progressed even further, I met a girl last night and asked her on a date. I’m slowly starting to see myself as worthy which is huge progress. Thanks again for taking an interest. 😁✌️

I admire the way you can self reflect and acknowledge why you might feel one way or another. Such a skill, your thoughts aswell are like a book, mine are scatty at the best of times.

Hi Freddo I´m 7 months late, so I don´t know where you stand now. Still I would like to say this: I really enjoyed your video respectively the way you expressed your excitement, feelings, thoughts and wishes. It´s an amazing quality to have as a man & that makes you really attractive & interesting! As for your insecurities: We all have them & it´s in the human nature to compare - wheelchair or not. As for the dating story: Based on what you said (as we don´t know the whole details) I don´t think this was particularly about your wheelchair but simply about the spark /chemistry. Or maybe her own insecurities came into play. You never know & it´s not that easy to express them in those early dating stages. Yes Dating is hard & triggers sometimes our worst fears. But it gives us also the opportunity to acknowledge our weak spots & work on them. I personally think that you saw Lou (?!) moving on & your friends having families & maybe the fear of being left back or never getting that for yourself came into play. We´ve all been there ;-) Sometimes the right things take time as we still need to grow or learn in order to not mess them up when they arrive :-) At least that´s what I´m telling myself when those fears hit me hard ;-p But I still believe in them. As you really seem like a nice & cool person I think you´ll find the right woman (if it did not happen already - again 7 months passed) & with your spirit for sure a job if/when you decide to go for it. Also I think that a friendship is the best start for a relationship, so you never know what may come out of being in the friendzone. Also also it´s not so easy to find good friendships these days, so if you vibe with that girl & she´s not the love of your life a new friend can be exciting too! And yeah you probably know all of that but still sometimes it helps to hear/read those things from a stranger in order to know that...your understood? not alone? I don´t know...it´s just helps as we go trough the ebb & flow of life 😅

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

Жыл бұрын

Hey thanks so much for your thoughtful message, it's so kind of you to reach out, yes, it's crazy how much can change in 7 months. I haven't watched this vid in a long time, and your comment prompted me to do so, and wow. I had a lot of insecurities back then and some I have worked on, some I have overcome and some I still have! What a blast from the past. I have come a long way since. I have actually met someone and have found romance, and you're right, we were friends first. She's lovely, we have a lot in common and she lives in the UK. I have spoken about it on the podcast, but not on YT. It's early days but she has come to visit me here in Morzine a few weeks ago and she's coming back in Oct too. I still struggle with what I'm doing with my life, but I'm really happy and healthy, I had a fantastic summer and looking forward to what adventures may come my way. I've applied to be a mentor for people with SCI. I'm working on my French. Who knows where I'll be in another 7 months. I appreciate your thoughts and support, your kind compliments and the opportunity for me to reflect back on this. ✌

@sanjanedeljkovic3362

Жыл бұрын

@@FreddotheWheelchairGuy ✌🖖

I just listened to your list.... Youl have no problem achieving it bro. I broke my neck surfing 25 years ago so ive got a bit of experience to say that

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

10 ай бұрын

Thanks so much. I hope so too!

I apologize Freddo - I’m falling behind here - I’m only getting to this video a year late. I’ll try to do better. I’ve been busy following your sometimes-collaborator Brittney. I hope that you have found love in the past year since you did this one. And that you found a more chair-friendly environment, where everyone speaks English. And, since it is December 19th, I wanted to be sure to wish you a Merry Christmas and all the best in the New Year. Like everyone else, you deserve happiness and fulfillment. Cheers!

If the young lady can't see past the disability she doesn't deserve you. Sometimes girls don't know if you can be intimate. So just let them know before it gets that far

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

10 ай бұрын

Thanks, these are kind words. I have found love once again, this was an old video and I was just venting my frustrations at the dating game. It turns out, a lot of able bodied people get very tired of dating misadventures too! It’s very normal. I have found a lovely young lady that sees past the wheelchair and we’re smitten 🥰

Sounds like you need to move back england. And start a new life .

I wouldn't be here if my dad wasn't paraplegic and I wouldn't have had it any other way. I feel like I had some very unique and special experiences that I would never have had if dad wasn't paraplegic. My dad had a car accident in the summer of 1976 in America. He was just 24. You remind me of my dad a bit with your positivity. Within 6 weeks of his accident he was learning to drive an automatic car (with the help of his best friends who'd flown over from Yorkshire) around the car park of the Chicago hospital. Soon after he was flown back to Sheffield Northern General spinal injuries ward in England because it would have been astronomically expensive to do rehab in the US. Sheffield NG was where my mum was training to be a nurse. In short, they met, fell in love and have been married 43 years. Dad's had a successful self-employed career for over 30 years, he's now a leading accessibility consultant specialising in heritage and countryside related projects (Twitter: @phila11y). When I was little I was aware that I had a different home life to my friends but nobody ever bullied me over it or made me feel different. So, I do not regret having a paraplegic parent growing up, I feel like it gave me another layer of emotional intelligence, empathy and awareness most people don't have. And as a family we have met a lot of paraplegic-able bodied couples over the years with thriving families too. Don't ever give up hope of it happening for you. All the best 😊 💕 - Clare, Yorkshire, England.

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

Жыл бұрын

What a beautiful message, thanks so much! I think I'd make a great dad, and I really appreciate you taking the time to write that long comment. When I first got injured I was upset that I wouldn't be able to teach my future son/daughter to snowboard or bike, but a friend said, that's why there are instructors for those sports, a father teaches so much more, and you have a lot more to offer than just those things. Now I see that he has a great point, if anything, I think I'd be an even better dad now. Fingers crossed for the future. ❤✌

You think you've got problems? I am struggling to put my vacuum cleaner back together after changing the collection bag and I have to dig out the manual! I like how you automatically apologise to your Mum if there is content which she might not agree with. What you experienced after your friend left is called event drop and very normal. I feel your frustration, especially at this time of year one tends to think about life and setting goals. Seems to me as if you are pretty settled in Morzine and have a great circle of friends. Your language skills can always be worked on. Ok, cannot do much to sort out the hills and difficulties getting around, doubt it will be much better in GB. I only have experience in that field as pushing people in wheelchairs, but even that is hard! Anyway, feel free to have a moan on your channel, and people like me will still listen to you, whilst trying to fix household appliances....

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

2 жыл бұрын

Event drop! Maybe that was it. Plus covid - not fun. I think my time in Morzine is coming to an end. New adventures await!

@silkedavid8876

2 жыл бұрын

@@FreddotheWheelchairGuy Does that mean Apes on Tapes would finish as well? How is Benji? Hopefully busy with work!

I really think you should move to the uk ... your chances of meeting someone will increase dramatically when you can speak the same language..i have 2 friends who married guys with sci and they have kids and all rhe ups and downs of every other couple i know... also forget the wheelchair u were with lou a long time and it will take some getting over . Lastly you are really good-looking and honest and funny .. work with that !!! You are not the chair and i think u will be surprised how many people see you and only you Go home my friend and make life easier xxx

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

2 жыл бұрын

I think you're right, it's calling. It's scary tho, but new adventures are on the horizon. Thanks for the kind compliments

@Kenzie_McIntyre

2 жыл бұрын

@@FreddotheWheelchairGuy not just a kind compliment but the truth ...we all have a time when our looks go and we become invisible i am suggesting you use this time while you are a good-looking man to take action ...also every date ,relationship will feel weird after lou but when it doesn't that is when you have truly moved on .... and no midnight stalking on the internet of her new relationship cos remember its going to look like a fairy Disney romance at the moment...that is what the internet does cos no one posts pics of arguments!!!!

@Kenzie_McIntyre

2 жыл бұрын

@@FreddotheWheelchairGuy also just read you deleted instagram ...I was surprised you had it ...I haven't got any social platforms because I can't stand what its doing to people's perceptions of what their life should look like ....we all live in dark and light times but I feel instagram insists if we are not in the light then there is something fundamentally wrong with us . We are not entitled to happiness we need to make it sometimes x

bud im able to walk no limitations and women have literally told me to my face im ugly people can just be cruel you are a better looking dude than me never compare yourself to your exs partner its her loss for not seeing the perfect partner she had

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

2 жыл бұрын

Ah man, we left on good terms, she deserves happiness with her new fella, and I'm honestly very happy for them both. Sorry you had bad experiences, I hope things are better for you now

@robertsmith987

2 жыл бұрын

@@FreddotheWheelchairGuy brother same to you god bless

I don't know if you ever heard of Eckhart Tolle, but you might find his talks, books, and videos interesting. Take care, and stay strong. Peace.

It's not your chair dude, it's actually exactly what you said it's your thoughts about it and your insecurity it puts women off not the chair or your disability itself! I've been there it's not easy to overcome but once you do women will be all over you ❤️

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

10 ай бұрын

Cheers! This is an old video and you’re absolutely right. I have a new girlfriend now and she’s awesome ❤️

@rollwiththepunches5932

10 ай бұрын

@@FreddotheWheelchairGuy congratulations

I finally watched a video freddo! KZread suggested it! I got a question, how do you know your feet are cold?

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

2 жыл бұрын

Haha I feel them with my hands 😂 glad you enjoyed the video mate, why does KZread suggest the videos where I’m talking about my insecurities? 🤦‍♂️

@robyoublind3107

2 жыл бұрын

@@FreddotheWheelchairGuy well yeah obvious now you mention it.

@robyoublind3107

2 жыл бұрын

@@FreddotheWheelchairGuy the algorithms go straight for the meat.

Absolutely. Btw...you are a beautiful man.

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

10 ай бұрын

Thanks so much, what a kind compliment ❤️

Also man 3 years everything can change! Just make sure you go to the south of the uk right?

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

2 жыл бұрын

Yeah actually considering Southampton would you believe it. Flat, familiar, friends and family- perhaps a stepping stone, but crazy to think if you had told me THAT 3 years ago!

Hey man, just watching this now. How are things now, over a year later? Have some of the arrows hit anything? 🙂

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

Жыл бұрын

Absolutely man, check out my follow up videos. I had a new romance ❤️

@muenchhausenmusic

Жыл бұрын

@@FreddotheWheelchairGuy Cool 😀 I'll check em!

I got a lot of thoughts, but one thing i definitely want to say is i've never swiped left because of a wheelchair. 🖤

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

2 жыл бұрын

Wow the thought of online dating is terrifying, the girl I was on a date with told me she’d swipe past me on a dating app because of the wheelchair, which was very honest but painful to hear. I have to accept it’s a deal breaker for a lot of people. I think it would have been for me too, which is also quite painfully honest

@stellannie86

2 жыл бұрын

@@FreddotheWheelchairGuy online dating is quite terrifying in general :D i guess everyone has their own deal breakers, and everybody has some. i'll swipe instantly past guys posing with an animal they'd just killed (which honestly eliminates quite a lot of them..)

I'm able bodied but yes I would date someone in a wheelchair, why wouldn't I, you have as much to offer as an able bodied person, the wheelchair is just an add on, it wouldn't bother me at all, I've only just found your channel but I had to comment here, I don't understand people who have that attitude that oh your in a wheelchair I'm not dating you, it's very sad

@FreddotheWheelchairGuy

Ай бұрын

Thanks Lucy, that’s kind. What are you up to Friday night? 😂 Seriously tho- There are some great people in the world, like my awesome girlfriend and it doesn’t bother her, and she never thought she would date someone in a wheelchair, but I guess she couldn’t resist my charm 😂

@Lucy-Wilkinson

Ай бұрын

I'm free Friday night 😂😂 Seriously though there are alot of ladies that would date someone in a wheelchair, and men too, but there's always the few that spoil everything.