“I used to think that the worst thing in life was to end up all alone. It’s not. The worst thing in life is to end up with people who make you feel all alone” -Robin Williams

@darkanglestr8line452

3 жыл бұрын

Williams committed suicide

@SmallFaerie

3 жыл бұрын

@@darkanglestr8line452 Yes, maybe he was unfortunate enough to end up with people who made him feel all alone.

@user-hw6kq4ne2t

2 жыл бұрын

He wasn’t happy. People who remain single die younger

@reinhardstadler3850

2 жыл бұрын

@@user-hw6kq4ne2t divorced people die 9 years younger

@illuminationinmotion

2 жыл бұрын

I feel like being married is a roller coaster ride. You have ups and downs and to get off the ride is the scariest part. I miss being single.

I spent decades looking for 'the one'. Turns out it was me.

@sarahoneill3755

7 жыл бұрын

calvin you are a troll - go somewhere else no on likes your kind here youre pathetic.

@TriffanyHammond

7 жыл бұрын

The great thing is during the creation of your own full, rich life you meet others who have full, rich lives and your growth and satisfaction is exponential as a result.

@sarahoneill3755

7 жыл бұрын

stfu troll we all see how pathetic you are youre making a fool of yourself

@c.t.2252

7 жыл бұрын

So, Calvin Smith, tell us about your full, rich life. And...really...what are YOU doing here watching this video? I sense bitterness and deep, abiding unhappiness. You'll come back with something sarcastic, I'm sure, but no one will be impressed. Just you. Lonely life, isn't it, Calvin Smith.

@joncavanaugh9980

7 жыл бұрын

It wasn't masturbation humour. It was just humour. I honestly thought you were trying to be funny, too.

I just hate how people in relationships pity single people.. Single people are happy doing their own thing pls respect that.

@vendeverous886

3 жыл бұрын

Don’t you think married people and people in relationships are mocked and belittled more than singles? Look at this lady, what is she doing? I hope she is as happy as she claims.

@Lilweh

3 жыл бұрын

I fuckijg hate those peeps

@snoozyq9576

3 жыл бұрын

@@vendeverous886 no that's why this ted talk exists...

@beyondher

3 жыл бұрын

They pity us because they envy us maybe? Freedom is the highest value and relationships create a subtle bondage

@chiaramendonca2287

3 жыл бұрын

I agree to this ! 🔥

It takes a lot of balls and confidence to talk to a dead audience. Kudos to you

@priyankasingh1721

2 жыл бұрын

lol I agree. That could be because most of them are probably not single. You cannot understand what you haven't tasted.

@writerforlifeify

2 жыл бұрын

@@priyankasingh1721 But all of them were single at some point, likely for longer periods than coupled. Anyway, I love how damn happy she is; she smiled & chuckled from start to finish!

@priyankasingh1721

2 жыл бұрын

@@writerforlifeify Being single, and wanting to stay single are two different things. A lot of people want to get married, mostly because that's how they are told. Their parents got married, and even their parents did so we also have to do it. It is conditioning. Most people are scared of the idea of staying alone. That is why so many people spend their entire life in dysfunctional relationships. Not because they don't have an option, but because they can't imagine how their life would be otherwise. Not many people dare to diverge from the pattern.

@fanatic632

2 жыл бұрын

@@priyankasingh1721 True. Where I live most marry because society keep asking you why you aren't married. Why don't you marry? Why someone is not marrying you? Is something wrong with you?

@writerforlifeify

2 жыл бұрын

@@ChardicusFinch Maybe that's her usual style of delivery? Don't know as I haven't seen her speak to an audience in other venues. She appears to be practically gloating over the virtues of singledom (which she so enjoys, as do I) but I'm focusing on the content of her talk, not her manner of presentation. I don't mind her smiles & laughter; at least she's not monotonous. And why cast aspersions on the speaker? She's not responsible for an audience's reaction or lack thereof. How many peeps fall asleep in church or class? Not the priest's or teacher's fault. A professor of behavioral science, Paul Dolan, recently concluded that the happiest, healthiest, & longest-lived subset in the general population is comprised of SINGLE (never-married) child-free women. I don't doubt it. He says we've suspected this all along but now solid research backs up his claim. The results were less favorable for widows & divorcées. Again, the single women who scored highest in the happiness-health metrics across all age groups were never married or pregnant at all. :)

Being single is the most underrated kind of freedom

@clouds-h5549

3 жыл бұрын

Single is a blessing

@FehrGormenghastTodd

2 жыл бұрын

@Sero Azuessounds like someone is trying hard to troll because he is jealous... Get a life or figure out one and leave the rest comfortably in peace.

@pierre-olivierlaurin9025

2 жыл бұрын

Amen.

@adrianrennie4735

2 жыл бұрын

i call that total freedom .

@amanimahjoub1532

2 жыл бұрын

@Sero Azues he agrees actually my cat is single too and we both are happy

I would rather be alone than with the wrong person.

@oaklandsoldier8520

4 жыл бұрын

That's true.

@danamckenny1694

4 жыл бұрын

@@oaklandsoldier8520 I agree.

@GoldenPhoenix_09

4 жыл бұрын

I 100% agree. There is nothing worse than being with the wrong person.

@oldmanjinkinsskyrim737

4 жыл бұрын

Damn straight.

@shawnparker1207

4 жыл бұрын

yes

I spent decades going through one failed relationship after another. Finally i decided to stop dating, give myself time to heal and "work on myself." You know what I found? HAPPINESS.

@anonymous_5720

Жыл бұрын

To be honest I am also happiest when I don’t feel pressured about dating. I spent 2 years detoxing myself from dating scene and I lost 10kgs of weight look better feel better. Just started dating again few months back but now with a different mindset. I don’t date because I need to, and I am fearless in walking away the moment I feel disrespected or not treated well. I don’t HAVE to date.

@natukundadorothy2895

Жыл бұрын

On my detox too. So far so good

@urbanadrian1907

Жыл бұрын

@@anonymous_5720 2 years with someone and I thought so highly of them 2 weeks later she got another boyfriend put them on top of my world but one thing I didn’t realize is that I depended on her for my happiness and not myself

@anonymous_5720

Жыл бұрын

@@urbanadrian1907 the great part is that you atleast have realized that you shouldn’t depend on her (or anyone) for your happiness. God is directing you in a better direction, be fearless

@f3rrrmi

Жыл бұрын

that was me, I'm still young tho, but I would rather spend my youthness doing fun stuff, helping my family and friends and working on my dream job!!

My current favorite quote: "If you're lonely when you're alone, you are in bad company. " Jean Paul Sartre

@harveydeutschendorf8964

3 жыл бұрын

Perfect!

@rekasfpreparat

3 жыл бұрын

That's gonna be one of my favourites too from now on ;-) One that I personally love is: "Nothing tastes as good, as healthy feels" - ?

@freedomworks3976

3 жыл бұрын

nyx cin JP Sartre was a stone cold gangsta pimp

@nyxcin1

3 жыл бұрын

@@freedomworks3976 Sincs he was awarded a Nobel prize for Literature, perhaps you're referring to someone who might travel in your circle of acquaintances?

@louisar4227

3 жыл бұрын

Being in solitude and being lonely are two completely different things

There is a huge difference between being alone and being lonely.

@KayeDakota

3 жыл бұрын

I am both.

@blast2686

3 жыл бұрын

Kaye Dakota :(

@mintu7899

3 жыл бұрын

Very true! People often blur the line between them!

@ihaa915

3 жыл бұрын

You are bad company if you feel lonely!

@beamills9205

3 жыл бұрын

I AM SINGLE AND NOT LONELY.......DOGS !

When I got divorced, I swore I'd never marry again ... and all my friends assured me I would ... that my ex just wasn't The One. Well, I'm now 72 and have been joyously single for 35 years ... 👍

@fatimahrahmani4208

5 жыл бұрын

Vi Olly wow Ma’am👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻

@kellykirkpatrick8978

5 жыл бұрын

Awesome. I'm turning 50 next month and divorced last year to #3 . I've said the same thing that you said. More and more, I don't want to live with anyone else or to be attached in a way where I have to lose me in the process of marriage I'm much too independent and don't like dealing with other people's issues, messiness, their families, their plans, goals, and designs that always seem to rise above all of my plans designs and goals. Done with not mattering to others.

@Analyticalinadream

5 жыл бұрын

I am 56 saying the same thing. It just wasn't for me.

@mjohnson1741

5 жыл бұрын

@@kellykirkpatrick8978 I realized this when I was 20 and women specifically WW looked at me crazy! I'm 39 still not married don't even have children and couldn't love life more. When I say I cry tears of joy all the time they (married w/kids) look at me like I'm crazy!lol

@jessicalee163

5 жыл бұрын

Vi Olly good for you. I’m in my early twenties and quite independent. Would possibly like a partner. Wish there was more representation of happy non married women in society. I say power to people who want a documented partner and those who don’t!

Jealous married people in the audience. This is such an important conversation. Thank you for voicing this, Bella

@baassiia

2 жыл бұрын

I don't know personally any single 30+ Year old person that I could admire or aspire to be. Nothing to be jelaous about. They are usually a big kids or wierdos with mental Issues.

@saraalbouji

2 жыл бұрын

@@baassiia dense

@jessicayoung7132

2 жыл бұрын

@@baassiia You make no sense at all with saying that, but you have a right to your opinion of the Single people you've met. Not all single people have mental issues. There are also plenty of Married people with mental issues as well, like people who stay in abusive relationships just so they are not single. That is mental right there. You seem very close minded. Bless your heart.

@baassiia

2 жыл бұрын

@@jessicayoung7132 I not wrote that all of them have mental issues, in fact most of them are just big kids (excatly what I wrote). Self center, neddy and moody, not willing to compromise. Some of them are very sucesfull in their career indeed. Work is about something else that being a partner. Nothing wrong about being single, I just not envy single people anything. People are different and we all value different things.

@lolmacdonald9401

2 жыл бұрын

Haha that's probably true!! Lol! X

I’m 67 and single. I love it. When I was a GP, I listened all day to patients complaining about their marriage and/or family problems. I’m much happier than they were.

@karalozdan4414

2 жыл бұрын

I hear you! Same here, except I was married twice and the only benefit in being married is to do couple"s events and have a company for adventures like skiing, movies, dining etc. Otherwise, flying solo is the best.

@rachnasingh5121

2 жыл бұрын

I don't intend to sound intrusive but I am curious to know - how did you became sure in your mind about whether or not you would want to be a single parent sometime in future? Thanks for sharing your experience. I am reading each comment on this video and some of those (like yours) are very touching.

I am single, professional, fit and health, with 2 cats. Life is heaven.

@catcherintherye6479

4 жыл бұрын

cats are heaven on earth

@mstwelvedeadlycyns

4 жыл бұрын

And what do the cats think?😺😸😹😼😽

@mstwelvedeadlycyns

4 жыл бұрын

@Mykel Hardin Cat Lady

@catrionacollins2593

3 жыл бұрын

@mike h you seem offended that this is lady is expressing her happiness. Why?

@denny7403

3 жыл бұрын

Obviously it's because of your cats. That was the point you were trying to make right?

sometimes i'm concerned with how much i enjoy being single.

@mjohnson1741

4 жыл бұрын

I'm not, it actually reminds me I've made the right choice.

@caroltrendall63

4 жыл бұрын

Don't be. I'm exactly the same!

@nonexistenty4152

4 жыл бұрын

I’m tremendously happy being single ;)

@SSBMA1994

4 жыл бұрын

I'm happy single. I'm annoyed people around me don't believe it and keep trying to hook me up with someone.🤣

@KAcreativeworld172

4 жыл бұрын

I m single and happy, there are so many responsibilities and lots of burden I saw in married life. They laughed at me but I don't care.

as a single woman with no children and fresh into my 40s, i find myself explaining to folks more often than id like. people think im incomplete for some reason... the more i think on it, ive also noticed that people get perplexed and more so angry at the fact that i am a single/no children person who is genuinely happy and can have a well rounded conversation about anything, with no judgment. respecting the way others live is a rare thing. therefore ive learned, to live happily and tell no one.

@rachnasingh5121

2 жыл бұрын

I am so happy to read your comment on this video. Would you like to give any suggestions to someone like me who intends to live single forever? Finances, elderly care services, and how to be sure about this aspect of whether or not to be a single parent

@pharaohosam

2 жыл бұрын

People fear what they don’t understand

@m3kbeatz

Жыл бұрын

@@pharaohosam i fear a lot. Beeing alone in this world is not great. Getting old and accepting everything in life is just too much.

@kimbrown6307

Жыл бұрын

They are only jealous because they want to be like you but can't be on there own .Embrace your single life .I've been single a long time and love it because the scense of freedome us great .Just love yourself and do what makes you happy ❤️

@m3kbeatz

Жыл бұрын

@@kimbrown6307 isnt it scary to be always alone and sleep alone, etc .. ?

I wish I heard this 30 years ago...when parents and society made us feel guilt and shame for being single. Marriage is NOT for everyone.

@denniswilliam8867

2 жыл бұрын

Hello sharone, how are you?

@RealtorSharone_B_Wilson

2 жыл бұрын

@@denniswilliam8867 I'm great, how are you?

@denniswilliam8867

2 жыл бұрын

@@RealtorSharone_B_Wilson I'm fine, where are you from?

@FalconFlyer75

2 жыл бұрын

honestly most of my life I was pretty content staying single (didn't think I was cut out for relationships) now that I'm turning 29 i'm starting to feel a lot of social pressure since all of my cousins are married and most of my friends are in relationships its hard some days but I don't feel ready for marriage and im afraid of making a terrible mistake just to feel normal

@pranavareddy706

Жыл бұрын

@@FalconFlyer75 I am also in same situation

I think that the entire audience is married so they were all annoyed or jealous bc she is so happy.

@Dramatello

4 жыл бұрын

trueeee

@shelleynewood6841

4 жыл бұрын

That’s what I thought. They looked in shock .

@mjohnson1741

4 жыл бұрын

They represent the status quo mainstream who have drank the koolaid and are in disbelief that there could be an alternative route to happiness and not just the marriage narrative that society only accepts.

@helen8625

4 жыл бұрын

Yeah😂

@katknutsen6822

4 жыл бұрын

Yeah you could feel the envy seeping out 😂

I've got that one single uncle in the family and he's the happiest individual ever!

@chillinator

6 жыл бұрын

Also known as a "Funcle" - lol

@paull.rogers4562

5 жыл бұрын

I'm that uncle. All of my nieces and nephews tell me this all the time.

@purpleflametarot39

5 жыл бұрын

I have an uncle like that. He's going to be 80-years old this year, he looks 60! No wife and no children for him equaled minimal stress. He constantly walks everywhere he goes. Happy and healthy. It's very rare to love and be loved at the same time.. you usually get one or the other, and being on either side sucks.

@Grace-ey7pk

5 жыл бұрын

i have one like that too. he's my bff!

@astromann7449

5 жыл бұрын

Your my nephew? Yep, can relate. I'm that guy. Some are very jealous.

Single person: I'm single and happy People in toxic relationships: Wait. That's illegal.

@Trisof88

3 жыл бұрын

Society fools them to believe they have to be partnered to win in life lol.

@colinogorman8279

3 жыл бұрын

😂

@bullgirlmamamuse7452

3 жыл бұрын

love that statement! I did a lil satire sketch on society standards - if anyone wants to check it out, I'm a quite newbie her on yt and would be happy to get some feedback, no matter of positive or negative. Oh, and I'm single

@basedheretic4616

2 жыл бұрын

I've never seen this, ever.

@ashtynrose1906

2 жыл бұрын

Yeah! For some reason people assume any relationship is a good relationship.

People who are terrified of, "Growing old alone," really need to deal with that fear. The mathematical odds are strong that you will likely outlive your partner or spouse and end up alone or get divorced and end up alone. Get comfortable in your own skin now and you may find that living alone is actually pretty great when you learn how to take on the challenges proactively.

@mariac6280

Жыл бұрын

U said it beautifully 😍 ❤

@aaronheryford3507

Жыл бұрын

All God’s creatures die alone

@johnmoran7996

Жыл бұрын

Isnt that special.i was with a girl years ago that came back and we lived together many years.wasted my time on her!she had once said we will die together.well,last year at 60 she passed away from terminal cancer.the entire time she didn't listen to me,didn't properly take care of herself or even our pets when I was away,other things.i literally wasted my best years on this woman and for what?most woman are assholes anyway from my own observation over the years.

@a.l.6176

8 ай бұрын

True. Most people end up alone in the end. Im just one step ahead of them. And have no anger or resentment against a partner or from a partner daily. Like most married people I know. Have to listen to a lot of complaining. 😅

Glad I'm not unhappily stuck in a quarantine with someone I don't love

@Sapphire901

3 жыл бұрын

Tea

@beamills9205

3 жыл бұрын

i'm quite happy isolating.....i have 6 great, well-mannered rescue dogs who love me unconditionally......a huge , fenced yard for all of us to romp in......i find joy in every day......

@ktwashere5637

3 жыл бұрын

there has never been a better time to be single. All those smug marrieds suddenly finding out that having children ain't so wonderful after all.

@83Bassgirl

3 жыл бұрын

Yes!

@PurplePinkRed

3 жыл бұрын

I was. I got rid of him. Three weeks later, it's f*cking bliss!

I love this woman, too bad the crowd is so dead

@davidnyro19

3 жыл бұрын

Agree. Every single cut-away of the audience shows them uncomfortable, defensive, even pissed-off. Are they thinking about their own relationships and becoming bummed out? Or do they think she's full of it? Probably all of the above. But no one seems engaged, interested, buying in...(So why are they even there? Hmmm.) One could mine a lot of "gold" just monitoring and assessing the temperature of this room. It would speak volumes and likely buttress a lot of what she's saying...

@JosannaMonik

3 жыл бұрын

Yes I think this is a good speech but she is speaking to the wrong audience.

@designingirl

3 жыл бұрын

It is fortunate this is now on the internet where it can reach the right audience. People all over have been so conditioned to think that marriage and married life are the ultimate goal that I understand the audience feeling uncomfortable. They're being told it's all a lie.

@yasminberrytic6157

3 жыл бұрын

I think she was over joyful Lin her way of speaking Like she is compensating in a way But I totally agree with her, as 27 girl I don’t see my happiness in getting coupled

@kendallevans4079

3 жыл бұрын

She would have more credibility if she would approach it as a serious subject and not smile through the whole thing

The crowd was dead ..you were awesome! Loved your lecture! I’m 47 and single by choice for 12 years and I love my freedom. You spoke the truth!

@mgmail7279

3 ай бұрын

Doesn't that say something about the majority of people out there and their caring about our experience....

When I was in a relationship I don't ever remember being whole and complete like I do when I am single🌟 Happiness is a personal journey ✌

@mjohnson1741

Жыл бұрын

👊

Whenever I am sad that I'm single, I remember the people who are in abusive relationships and who wish that they are single like me.

@bronwynwilson705

4 жыл бұрын

That's what I remind myself of too when I'm upset about being single. Especially since it's Covid and Domestic violence has risen.

@mazmaryam1212

3 жыл бұрын

as someone whose only ever been in abusive relationships and I'm only 20, I DO NOT WANT TO DATE ANYONE EVER AGAIN. Relationships and companionship are WEAK compared to the happiness I feel now I'm fully on my own and independent. Never ever looking back.

@iamingrid6469

3 жыл бұрын

The lack of $ is sad rather than being Single ..

@PurplePinkRed

3 жыл бұрын

That was me. I just got out of a domestic violence situation three weeks ago. I'm staying single for life. Not going through it again!

@thatsfunny2051

3 жыл бұрын

@@PurplePinkRed congratulations on your freedom from a horrible situation! I wish you well

The loneliest I've ever been was in a marriage.

@incognitomode6558

3 жыл бұрын

@@sophiakh9590 husband must have been ignoring her

@ermaabrazado5145

3 жыл бұрын

Ditto

@-travelandinspiration8779

3 жыл бұрын

really ? why ?

@dawnspage5091

3 жыл бұрын

With wrong person yes. When its dead.

@fedoff2190

3 жыл бұрын

I know how that is. I was married with 3 step kids and felt like a ghost in the house. It was a weird horrible feeling. When I moved out and had quiet solitude I couldn't be more happy.

She’s great and keeps her energy despite the audience!

@Papiringou

Жыл бұрын

Oops, was there an audience?

I had never known the profound depths of loneliness as much as when I was married to this unfaithful man...one is doomed to all the needless compromises in a marriage. Trust me, solitude in singleness is a blessing indeed.

@mmommo10

Жыл бұрын

amen Robin

You can be very lonely too if you married with a person who has very different values and lifestyle from yours.

@AmadeuShinChan

5 жыл бұрын

Xing Xiao ["what is your chinese zodiac sign?"]

@chuckhiggins15

5 жыл бұрын

Good thought. Resumes, ?

@easytoslip

5 жыл бұрын

Also I believe people perceive we are so far away from each other when energetically we are connected. I connect with people super easily and can feel them from afar easily (hyper empathic), I spend zero time in loneliness. I know it's not the norm, but it should be considered, as we are taught to build up walls around ourselves to protect us from all the toxicity in the world.

@amyong4677

4 жыл бұрын

Trapped as well. That is worse than loneliness.

@eimearoflaherty9242

4 жыл бұрын

I’ve never felt lonelier than when in a relationship with an emotionally unavailable partner.

I needed to be alone to find me, it is a scam to look for another half. I am a whole. Thank you

@deesee3622

5 жыл бұрын

yup

@WeatherWorld

5 жыл бұрын

Abibatu Bangura it’s about time someone said this.... I’m glad👍🏽

@ViolentLucius

5 жыл бұрын

Wise words.

@jessicalee163

5 жыл бұрын

Tangerine Dream fan I agree. As if we’re half of a person or half as important as married people

@MAR7LO

5 жыл бұрын

Truth

After being married for 48 years I'm now single. The freedom is excellent! I'm so much happier now as a single lady than I ever was as a wife. I probably was intended to be single my whole life, but I fell for the fairytale and was tied down for most of my life. After spending the past 3 years single, I'm totally loving my freedom now!

@GroovyGranny1959

Жыл бұрын

Me too

@a.l.6176

8 ай бұрын

I am also happier now I’m single. Best thing about the marriage was having three great kids. Will not get trapped again!

@Damian12312

6 ай бұрын

And you are still single ? I'm 25, being alone is painful for me. Every day.

@Clarinda787

6 ай бұрын

Happiness is a state of mind. You can be as happy or sad as you choose to be. Choose to be happy and you may surprise yourself. @@Damian12312

@a.l.6176

6 ай бұрын

@@Damian12312 I have three children. They do not live in my city but they phone me. I have a dog. I have friends that I see a few times a week. I talk to people when I walk my dog. I have old friends I other cities that I talk to. I know the feeling of loneliness. It is fleeting mostly. I am happier now than in my relationship. You are young. You have not build up the long relationships with kids and old friends. You might want to find a way to start getting people into your life. I wish you happiness.

I love this. I was pressured into marrying at a young age and was married miserably for 32 years. I have been single almost 10 years and people are always after me to get back in the dating game. I am happy being single and will stay that way the rest of my life.

@janetamplin7318

3 жыл бұрын

Same story

@mmommo10

Жыл бұрын

same

@rachnasingh5121

Жыл бұрын

I love the confidence with which you said that. When one has so much clarity in the mind, it feels so blissful! More power to you.

@mjohnson1741

Жыл бұрын

Same, single is pure bliss!

@Damian12312

6 ай бұрын

And are you still single ? I'm 25, being alone is painful for me. Every day.

I honestly find my married friends the most depressing people I've ever met, and I thank god everyday I will never fall for that trap: for I am not afraid of my loneliness , I thrive on it!

@LDT7Y

5 жыл бұрын

Exactly! It's pretty rare that you find 'the one' and spend 50+ years of your life in married bliss and then die together. Normally people settle out of fear of being alone, then it's 10 years of 'ok' relationship with increasingly numerous odd arguments, constant stress and insults, then passive aggressive tolerance into middle age, then constant bickering and barely spending time together after retirement and/or one of you dying earlier than the other and the remaining individual grows old alone anyway. More than likely with open or not so open cheating at some point along the way. May as well embrace the single life from day one, plan ahead, and meet other single people to hang out with instead. If need be, get a housemate to share the bills. I'm happy to find a man to be lifelong friends with, without any legal or moral ties, if such a thing exists. I also have a big family who are having kids on my behalf. But I only rely on myself to be there when I need it, as other humans don't know me as well a I know myself and don't (and can't) have my best interests at heart.

@jessicalee163

5 жыл бұрын

BritBit You’re so accurate in your depiction of marriage. My parents got married (24,29), and they’re middle age and SO passive aggressive. Also, so many nice people are in these comments. It’s rare to find people so woke and self aware and into self care 💕💕💕

@peterpyke1213

4 жыл бұрын

being alone is not being lonely

@professorwoland3181

4 жыл бұрын

Your *aloneness

@allapparel3973

4 жыл бұрын

All the best

Singlehood = peace and quiet

@nwatson2773

4 жыл бұрын

daboys1215 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾

@barbarawarren9443

3 жыл бұрын

Yes!

@narellesegecic9743

3 жыл бұрын

Yep 👍🏼🌻

@JustaReadingguy

3 жыл бұрын

Single for me is very busy. Sleep is had to come by.

@helenbostock2350

3 жыл бұрын

It what you accepted. enjoy

The first time I felt properly happy was when I realised I didn't want a partner. I'm glad more and more people are realising the same thing.

@rachnasingh5121

2 жыл бұрын

I am so happy to read your comment on this video. Would you like to give any suggestions to someone like me who intends to live single forever? Finances, elderly care services, and how to be sure about this aspect of whether or not to be a single parent

I love how happy she is. The crowd seem a lil salty haha. Personally I have seen the benefits of being single and love, enjoy my own company, I'm not scared of being on my own yet but I have seen married couples in healthy relationships thrive, grow together and have purpose in their lives also. There are benefits in both instances in my opinion.

@vendeverous886

2 жыл бұрын

That lady is not happy, of that I am certain. Watch it again.

@vendeverous886

2 жыл бұрын

@Anthony Her fake smile doesn’t deceive me for a second. She is actually very unhappy.

@vendeverous886

2 жыл бұрын

@Anthony I maintain my position sir, look at her eyes not her smile. Btw your ad hominem will not work on me.

@EverythingEsoteric11

2 жыл бұрын

@@vendeverous886 well, at least she has a better personality and way of talking than you.. Lol.. So, it's better to be this kind of unhappy than being in a relationship and developing a wrong attitude towards everyone who refuses to follow the crowd 🙄

@vendeverous886

2 жыл бұрын

@@EverythingEsoteric11 ??????

I'm a lifelong single at 53. Never really dated, or ANYTHING. And, I'm very happy. Who needs the DRAMA?

@xxxmmm3812

4 жыл бұрын

you've missed out A LOT. just don't date morons. there are some freaking amazing people out there.

@bonbonvrock84

4 жыл бұрын

@@xxxmmm3812 You're the one missing out, you completely missed what op said. Happiness is short term, contentment and peace is long-term and given that she's 53 and a few decades older than you have some respect and learn to understand that not everyone finds happiness in the same things as you. People and their circumstances are always very different.

@imsparkly7968

4 жыл бұрын

If you are happy, you are happy, I guess that's what matters. However, I guess drama with full capitals does not necessarily come along just because you have a relationship / date. All the best in any case!

@lorrainelavin764

4 жыл бұрын

Hey spot on leave the DRAMA for the Movie makers

@mjohnson1741

4 жыл бұрын

@@xxxmmm3812 I'm calling troll, you're all over the comments spewing self righteous BS.

I think the ones in the audience who aren't smiling are feeling a silent chill run through them as they realise the truth about their own relationships

Never been in a relationship, never will. You’ll never know how life is beautiful when the only person you have to deal with is YOURSELF.

@mjohnson1741

Жыл бұрын

Wow, so true 👍

@rachnasingh7359

2 ай бұрын

Loved to learn how much clarity you had in your mind.

I used to feel jealous of my friends getting married but now I'm glad it didn't happen to me because they are all devorced and the affairs they used to tell me about were shocking .Love my single life 😊😊😊

@mmommo10

Жыл бұрын

they all cheat!

@Glover6011

Жыл бұрын

Lol sure you do

@renek2913

Жыл бұрын

Love being single ❤️❤️

@theparanoidandroid3583

Жыл бұрын

I'm the same, don't understand why some people are so desperate for a relationship when they go wrong so often

Man here. Single for 20 years after divorce. No kids. I handle my own without ridiculous, absurd requirements, expectations & standards just fine. Ups & downs of life just fine. No divorce, no alimony, no drama, no preassure, no depressions, no arguments, no fights, no blackmail. No nothing bringing me down. I travel, I buy my own clothes. I volunteer. I take care of myself. Enjoy my music. I'm perfectly fine! And I want to remain that way

@vollvomhass3601

4 жыл бұрын

MGTOW 4 life

@helen8625

4 жыл бұрын

👌🏼👌🏼

@randydominguezmusic

4 жыл бұрын

Inspiring man!

@Blurggg

4 жыл бұрын

Yes yes yes! Personal freedom above all.

@danamckenny1694

4 жыл бұрын

Me too,. ❤️

I strongly believe that people who feel like they have to be in a relationship have unaddressed issues from within.

@oreste8570

4 жыл бұрын

Or maybe it's just instinctual urge for procreation. Without the people like that, you wouldn't exist to make this comment in the first place.

@YouYou-sm8tf

4 жыл бұрын

@@oreste8570 Nobody asked to exist anyways. Our parents didn't ask for our permission. Why are you so rude?

@docmax4556

4 жыл бұрын

Even Christ has issues... is feeling whole alone healthy? Question of Balance.

@mjohnson1741

4 жыл бұрын

Yep, but our society is so brainwashed that we all think it's the other way around. That being single is the most horrible lonely prospect. There are plenty married w/kids people who are miserable.

@pyalot

4 жыл бұрын

Somebody who strongly feels either way has unadressed issues, and a lack for openess to life however it comes.

I am 56 and single. Had a few relationships that never turned out. I have somewhat made peace with it. The worst part has always been those older female family members who kept asking why I wasn't married. I finally shut them up but telling them that I was planning on getting married, but I discovered that I really, really like sleeping around.

@BillieGote

2 жыл бұрын

LOL! Serves them right. Those of them who might finally realize how judgmental they were being toward you might have potential yet.

@mmmsunshine5367

2 жыл бұрын

😅🤣😂

@missdesireindependance5194

2 жыл бұрын

🤣😂 It your life not their life!

Tbh being single is the least stressful thing you can do for yourself. The mental energy you have to put into another person is exhausting doesn't matter whether you're in love with them or not 🤷🏼‍♀

Dating is actually incredibly stressful. It's not necessarily a happy and relaxed time.

@amandaserena2007

3 жыл бұрын

@Lateisha Jordan Coming from a woman who just went through an unsafe dating experience, you're exactly right.

@nkm327

3 жыл бұрын

Hahaaa... it SUCKS.

@colinogorman8279

3 жыл бұрын

Just leave the dating scene

@gilius

3 жыл бұрын

Dating is not that bad. You just have to go with 0 expectations, and happy that you may meet an interesting person :)

@joyariffic4217

3 жыл бұрын

Its such a waste of time. Ill never go on a date for the rest of my life

Being single is great. A lot less stressful honestly.

@janiemiller825

5 жыл бұрын

TokyoBlue No snoring 😴 in the ears 👂- lol 😂

@MariaCarabin

4 жыл бұрын

I agree! Being able to just focus on myself has been a relief.

@annakonickova5976

4 жыл бұрын

Yes absolutely! Still thinking about some plans, not-sleeping because of snoring...

Huge difference between opting for being single, and forced to adapt to being single

@DanJCarney

3 жыл бұрын

^^

@Liz-in8lu

3 жыл бұрын

Yes! I’m glad to see this comment. Single was nice for a while, but for me deep down I want companionship and to be known. I did get anxious when living with someone and the pressure of what marriage was, maybe I just chickened out... :/ But now I am sort of forced and learning to live alone.

@thizizitz

Жыл бұрын

@@Liz-in8lu wow, totally understand you!!!

@mswhitephantom

Жыл бұрын

Yes, the want for a partner is there. The offer from said partner is not. When you have a choice, it's great. When you don't, then what? You cannot tell me it's great when humans are social animals. What happens when you are alone and have no one? What if you're the single one with no friends or relatives or anybody else? What about those kind of people? The unwanted?

I’m 39 and so excited to finally be single again after 14 years of relationships.. I don’t even want to date... there is so much I want to do that requires total focus and freedom. The give and take of relationships can be out of balance if one person is more empathic or sensitive than the other. And this has been my experience, that I tend to over-give emotionally and that is not valued or repaid. I often feel that I am teaching my men how to be emotionally responsive and it becomes exhausting. I now can focus on my art and career and sleep better than I have since childhood. It’s refreshing to be single.

@rachnasingh5121

2 жыл бұрын

I am so happy to read your comment on this video. Would you like to give any suggestions to someone like me who intends to live single forever? Finances, elderly care services, and how to be sure about this aspect of whether or not to be a single parent

@renek2913

Жыл бұрын

Yes, agree. I'm 27 and I honestly love being single. I value my need for solitude and I feel more at ease being by myself

@beyondher

Жыл бұрын

@@renek2913 Good on you, that's great that you know what's right for you

@jazziew2148

4 ай бұрын

AMEN!

I thought marriage was totally over rated. I would rather be single and be in total control of my environment and have peace.

@tinasnow2006

5 жыл бұрын

jay hulrs Same. My friends are getting married already, some are dealing with mother inlaws and his family who don’t hide their hate for her. I can’t put myself in that situation life is too short, I’m here to enjoy and if I have to do it alone so be it 💃🏾

@lorrainelavin764

4 жыл бұрын

More freedom + in control of your Money when you want = Smiles ;)

@sideswiped6874

4 жыл бұрын

I have been with my wife since 81, and I get mad at her at times, but she is the one I can not get enough of ( < I am NOT talking sex there). I have found that the concept of friendship is a bit over rated.

@lorrainelavin764

4 жыл бұрын

@@tinasnow2006 good on you ;)

@putheflamesou

4 жыл бұрын

@@tinasnow2006 Get a rich old(no inlaws) brainwashed say Catholic single rich farmer that has his habits so nothing new to work around and then you can have land and riches. Too long term...green jello(sister had a healthy one with 2 farms). Marriage has many other pluses. You can be a career wife. The miserable unhealthy willing to divorce and enjoy a cutey the last year after the new house is built on a rich hill in outskirts of town(exs Mother did this so I got the details). I get 20% and bennies open(guaranteed plan). But hurry when they are gone they are gone.

What Bella is saying here is that there is a stigma attached to being single and that it needs to be addressed

@madhavrajsingh6084

7 жыл бұрын

Erica H. bang on buddy

@karenKristal

6 жыл бұрын

yes I agree

@medexamtoolsdotcom

6 жыл бұрын

If it had only been you, this whole talk could have been 4 seconds long instead of 18 minutes.

@MelissaBrownapt215

6 жыл бұрын

Erica H. - Mostly among church members. Reality? Even among poor bible believers, infidelity and divorce constitute the ultimate outcome. Before that, fierce fighting or not talking & sleeping with backs turned, because sometimes the cost of divorce is too high financially and socially.

@AprendizDeLoQueToca

5 жыл бұрын

Stigma by blue pillers is quite a compliment actually

What an intelligent, attractive, courageous and interesting woman, thank you for your lecture

When I was in my twenties, I thought the worst thing that could happen to me was to still be single at 40. Between 40-45 I was so depressed. It took me until my fifties and into my sixties to realize that not all married people are divinely happy. I believed that if someone I desired wanted to marry me, it was a sign of my self-worth. It would prove to the world I was worthy. I interviewed many married people and learned people get married for all kinds of reason. I don't think the response to never getting married is putting marriage down. Being single is great. It's the way society looks at single women of a certain age that is awful.

@catherineblair550

2 жыл бұрын

If they pity us so much why do they actively demean and make fun of us? They should be kind if pity is the main emotion. I am pretty sure it's that certain types of men seek to make our lives miserable. and promote these idea/stereotypes to people that don't know any better . They don't want us to be happy. so they make it so we are not respected. Why don't they want us to be happy? Because they want us all to marry and be their slaves.

@rachnasingh5121

2 жыл бұрын

I am so happy to read your comment on this video. Would you like to give any suggestions to someone like me who intends to live single forever? Finances, elderly care services, and how to be sure about this aspect of whether or not to be a single parent

Being single - one of the last acceptable prejudices. Thank you, Bella, for raising people's consciousness on this issue.

@petehuskins

7 жыл бұрын

And heaven forbid you don't want (or particularly like) children!! There must be something seriously wrong with you!! (Not really, I have loads more disposable income and take holidays wherever and whenever I want. Amongst many other reasons)

@Bagginsess

7 жыл бұрын

it makes a lot of sense, raising children should be viewed the same as a career: you want to add a well raised child to our population and treat as a serious science that's hard to perfect.

@jeffjeffrey4956

7 жыл бұрын

Climate change due to over population and yet the married people get the government welfare, add in some kids and it really adds up$$$. It's a broken system telling single people they are the ones out of sync. She is right, NEVER apologize to the "broken system" trying to guilt you into its dark game.

@Bagginsess

7 жыл бұрын

crack is a powerful drug... climate change is not caused by overpopulation... welfare is a very important system, even if it's abused you can't deny the immense benefit it gives. it's one of the ways roosevelt ended the great depression. cut the military budget, end of story. i have never met a single person in my life, on the internet, or through media who has said single people have a negative impact on society. only japan cares because they're birth to death ratio is now less than one, so there's legitimate concern for the future of their country as their country will slowly shrink into nothing if the trend continues for too long.

@911patagonia

7 жыл бұрын

Do you know MANBEARPIG?

Marriage is what you make it. Singleness is what you make it.... The End!

@PatrickRams

4 жыл бұрын

Unfortunately for marriage is the 2 of you....someone can decide to cheat while the other one is faithful and the is nothing you can do about it....

@BigUriel

4 жыл бұрын

@@PatrickRams You can maybe look for the right person to marry instead of marrying someone you met 6 months ago because they're really hot. A lot of guys would have saved themselves a world of hurt if they hadn't put a ring on it because she had a pretty face.

@PatrickRams

4 жыл бұрын

@@BigUriel I get what you are saying,what you are saying does help but still is not a guarantee that once you marry it will all work out....I know people who have dated for years before they marry but still divorced down the line You can never truly know someone,people change, situations change... that's what makes marriage a risk...it might work,it might not work...it takes two to tango and if one partner is not tuning to the dance,there is nothing you can do about it....

@mikoda92

4 жыл бұрын

@@BigUriel Exactly. I could not have said this any better myself.

@ricardomurillo5205

4 жыл бұрын

You can't make it. Married people can't decide what they want without approval of the other.

I believe happinnes is not dictated by being single, married, or whatever. Different people have different needs

I can believe this, I've been in a few relationships and they never made me feel less lonely or more connected. In fact feeling lonely in a relationship was always the worst kind of loneliness.

Being single or married should be your OWN choice...not someone else's such as society's. It is PSYCHOTIC to demand or obey such creeds. Follow your soul.

@beegee5305

4 жыл бұрын

Who's demanding anything?

@TCFan30

4 жыл бұрын

Not all successful relationships require those to be married either. Everyone on here is basically a pro-singles echo chamber where anybody who has a differing opinion gets berated and thumbed down. I say they are also psychopaths in their own right as well!

@diogofarias1822

4 жыл бұрын

@@beegee5305 Family! Friends! Etc.

@aguedaraguirre6854

3 жыл бұрын

Thank you for your comment. My family is constantly telling me i should date someone, right now i’m crying because i just don’t want to. Why can’t they understand?

Being married doesn't make you live longer, it just makes it seem that way.

@Anthony_in_Bloomington_Indiana

7 жыл бұрын

Posting an old cliche' that I've heard a hundred times doesn't make your comment read longer, it just seems that way.

@abelhuang2527

7 жыл бұрын

Anthony Starfield :-D

@strangelyjamesly4078

7 жыл бұрын

It's not an old cliché, it's an old joke.

@damishypedamischill7404

6 жыл бұрын

+Strangely Jamesly single not virgin people mean?

@legalservices8856

6 жыл бұрын

Strangely... I laughed, good one!

I love being single. I love living by myself.

Single people are the most happy people on the planet.

Too many women fall in love with the idea of marriage. The wedding itself is great but then what?

@tinasnow2006

5 жыл бұрын

mai x chang stuck with a cheating man child

@AmadeuShinChan

5 жыл бұрын

[ " either a couple matches or it doesnot. " ]

@ndlsumr

5 жыл бұрын

You're 100% right.

@johndonwood4305

5 жыл бұрын

@mai x chang It's not about marriage. It's the benefits of marriage that women stand to gain. That's why the laws and the state are skewed heavily towards women. That's also why women are marrying themselves.

@sthomas7211

5 жыл бұрын

or woman child that thinks shes the boss @@tinasnow2006

I am single and never been married, I am 63 and I am fine, marriage won t fix loneliness, you have to be comfortable with yourself

@Andy-uj1fe

3 жыл бұрын

I agree with you Larry!

@machellestone9541

3 жыл бұрын

so very true...

@robin_birdie_

2 жыл бұрын

How could you know if you haven't tried it yourself a single time? ) Don't be so silly. ) there is nothing to be proud of.

@poppagBallZ97

2 жыл бұрын

@@robin_birdie_ you just know

@basedheretic4616

2 жыл бұрын

This is only good advice for men, women on the other hand have all their work still ahead of them.

Marriage usually inherits children, friends usually disappear. Single people without children can come and go, and have to answer to no one. Single is the new norm.

I never felt more alone than when I was in a relationship. I never felt so continuously sick as I did when I was in a relationship. I never wanted a relationship so I assumed that I was an independent woman even when I agreed to be with my partner and yet I ended up thinking to myself after 2 years of sorrow, “ I’d rather be miserable than be without him.” It still saddens and shocks me to this day the mindset I had cultivated. I’m sure there are numerous couples out there that are happy but Darlin… just know that those sad moments of feeling lonely are worth the constant feelings of being in anguish. It’s ok to want someone but work on yourself first and remember you are whole and amazing even without a partner.

@mjohnson1741

Жыл бұрын

I'm glad I was in a relationship for years that I was absolutely miserable in. Why you ask? It taught me to NEVER allow myself to be that unhappy again. Now I have passion and sheer conviction about happiness that I didn't have before. Not being happy for years made me appreciate happiness so much more! Nothing on this planet is better than happiness, it's pure bliss! Now, I'm the NRA about my happiness, you'll have to pry it out of my cold dead hands!

@bebop54

4 ай бұрын

👌🏼💣@@mjohnson1741

I've been single my whole life. Decided to be happy with it...because no one is coming to save me.

@christopherlabedzski7575

4 жыл бұрын

Because relationships are very difficult now, some people, plus Myself are just not interested anymore we instead focus on ourselves to be independent

@doctordavidsam5299

4 жыл бұрын

Is a structure one must Build, despite age and time, we are just Ordinary people, we dont know where to go, we sleep with no hope of assurance of waking up Is faith otherwise we dont sleep. Blue I had love to meet you?

@christopherlabedzski7575

4 жыл бұрын

Well, some people are not as lucky as others, some people actually died alone, I know a guy of age 58 and never got a girlfriend in his lifetime

@beethovensfidelio

4 жыл бұрын

Christopher Labedzski To be fair, you can die alone even if you’ve been in a relationship or if you’re married like the husband dies years before the wife does.

@nwatson2773

4 жыл бұрын

Blue Bird very true

I am a single no romantic interest and I am very happy and stress free. Very content at peace... I have always been like this as long as I can remember. Never wanted to be married. Not bitter, never been hurt, just like being single. Thank You for this ted talk ❤️

@tinasnow2006

5 жыл бұрын

holly mccutcheon you so pretty. It’s great seeing older single happy women, im in my early 20’s, not bitter I’m happy warm and introverted. People stigmatize single women and idk why, seems to be a projection of their insecurities

@NoName-wc4qr

4 жыл бұрын

im single and ready to mingle lnao

@scrimmy45

4 жыл бұрын

And gorgeous too !

@marlonbrandoseyes1443

4 жыл бұрын

Wanna be my cuddle partner?

@archidasgupta453

4 жыл бұрын

Holly mccutechon me too, I'm in my thirties and happily living my single life. Always been that way , never felt finding a romantic partner is an end game.

I've never seen a more buoyant, effervescent speaker than Bella. Thank you for this. I have always been happy being single but I aspire to have at least an ounce of her energy and light when I'm her age.

Thank GOD! Someone finally said it, and put it so eloquently. That her opening words, introducing herself as having been single her whole life were so powerful, really says it all

OMG finally someone who knows living single is great!!!

A great talk. And yet the faces in the audience don't look happy to be hearing it AT ALL.... Is it really that hard to accept that people can be happy while single?

@demiwolters4375

5 жыл бұрын

I dont think there in disbelief that happy single people exsist. Its more that she is talking abouth it as if all single people secretly want to be single, but most realy want to find love. Chousing to be single forever means you truely only rely on yourself at most occasions and most people dont want that. But what most people makes so unheapy in relationships is that they diddnt expect having to work so hard on it. People who stay single do know this and choose to work on them selfs instead.

@janiemiller825

5 жыл бұрын

vayas09 Yes- societal conditioning Brainwashed into marriage being the only answer or acceptable outcome It will take time for society to be less ridged in its marriage views Come on- probably why such a high divorce rate . Many free spirit type/People getting married out of social pressure- obligation - conformity - when in their heart deep down happy to be single. Thus leads to high divorce rate. 😉 Been there- done that- remaining single now ( free spirit ).

@badooney

5 жыл бұрын

It's especially hard for people to accept that single people might CHOOSE (gasp!) to be single ON PURPOSE (gasp!) because they LIKE IT (gasp!) and that they're not just making the best out of a less desirable situation.

@LDT7Y

5 жыл бұрын

I'd love to read a fairytale where the princess remains single and goes off on adventures instead! If I was any good at writing, I'd create it myself! haha

@fordgt402

4 жыл бұрын

I would have given an standing ovation applause.

Over 20 years ago, in my mid 30’s I read the book “The Improvised Woman”, and it changed my life. Up until that point it had simply never occurred to me that a single life could be an option that would bring happiness. So what was a circumstance for me turned into a choice, and it was such a relief when I let go the idea that I must be in a romantic relationship to be fulfilled.

I LOVE being single. I would trade it for NOTHING. And this woman's infectious smile only makes me happier with my decision 🥰😎

@mmommo10

Жыл бұрын

same

I've never been as lonely as I was when I was married.

@danamckenny1694

4 жыл бұрын

True. I am not lonely being single. I am not looking for love. One can be lonely married or even in a roomful of people. Most sad when married.

@marshamcdonald1475

4 жыл бұрын

I cried every day after I married. He was not the same He changed after marriage. I did not have a help mate. He acted like I was his enemy. No caring, compassion. He Was hiding $, 🤥 lying, What a nightmare. Marriage Is a can of worms and dangerous to your mental Health,and bank account. Some are blessed with A dedicated loving partner. But that was not the case For me. Good luck to You all.

@iron-farmer

4 жыл бұрын

@@marshamcdonald1475 he was hiding the whole time hun. Your far better off now.

@murphy498

4 жыл бұрын

SAME!!!!

@derangedzone

3 жыл бұрын

Same thing

It's refreshing to read so many feel-good comments about how great life is being single. We need more positive, single role-models and less being made to feel guilty or bad!

@mysteryhatter

2 жыл бұрын

Same, strange usuary of KZread.

@TheShadowPerson.

Жыл бұрын

Well i'm single and yeah there's good moments to being lonely but the cons outway the pros to me. Been single 5 years and i've only gotten more unhappy.

@renek2913

Жыл бұрын

@@TheShadowPerson. you do you. There's no right or wrong anyway cus it's all about choice. Nothing wrong if you love being single or love being in a relationship

Although I agree with most of the things she said, I think the picture changes when ones dream is to have kids and form a family. I think It’s easier to embrace singleness when the person doesn’t care about having their own family .

@catherineblair550

2 жыл бұрын

Yeah I never particularly wanted kids so it is hard to look at things from the perspective of those that do.

@langreiper3327

Жыл бұрын

the last sentence downplays singleness as not caring about having a family. I know a woman who dearly wanted children and had them who did not want a partner. She is now in her 70's and our family gets together for holidays, birthdays, and fun times for the heck of it. She wasn't indoctrinated in to the religious, societal, fairy tale "dream" but still had a caring family. love you mom

Thank you for dispelling the myths. I’m not sure where this stereotype single people are all lonely and bitter came from. You can just tell by the audience reactions that some people will refuse to change their misconceptions even when facts are presented. It is unfortunate society still has this view on single people, but more people like this lady speaking out is a great and needed start

Happiness have very little to do with marriage. Happiness has to do with the pursue of goals. If you have nothing you want to do, you get depressed. It doesn't matter if you are single, married or whatever. If you are looking for other people to make you happy, you will never be truly happy. The best advice I got when I was a kid, was to set goals. If you have no goals, you get bored. If you are bored for too long, you get depressed.

@pcdispatch

5 жыл бұрын

If you don't have any personal contacts you will get depressed as well.

@xrc7445

5 жыл бұрын

True, but sometimes you may have important goals - just important, not difficult - and no matter how much you try, you fail. Bad circumstamces can put a halt. This can cause depression as well.

@mjohnson1741

5 жыл бұрын

@@pcdispatch Of course you need human contact but us humans can decide what it looks like for each of us on a individual basis.

@David-ej1ps

4 жыл бұрын

Big facts

@xxxmmm3812

4 жыл бұрын

thats all true but having some major goals that align with the ones your partner for life has and making it big together is bomb, there is no way you could be as happy crushing it alone than with another.

LMAO I felt like she was making fun of married people. I loved it :) This woman made my day.

@brittneybrisbin744

3 жыл бұрын

You could tell who the married people were in the audience😂

I always feel better after watching Bella's TED talk, she is so intelligent, beautiful and charming. Thanks Bella for your decades of research and shining the light for us single at heart folks.

This was extremely helpful as I am 47 year old woman who has been single for long stints of time and feel that I will probably never get married. Thank you. We need more happy stories about single people.

@rachnasingh5121

2 жыл бұрын

I am so happy to read your comment on this video. Would you like to give any suggestions to someone like me who intends to live single forever? Finances, elderly care services, and how to be sure about this aspect of whether or not to be a single parent

I don't mind being single, but I love having someone that cares for me.

@eddycolon1986

5 жыл бұрын

A dog

@madera3650

4 жыл бұрын

how now?

@sunnythymes5444

4 жыл бұрын

Misougámi Get a pet!

@beegee5305

4 жыл бұрын

Doesn't mean he will care for you if you get married. God cares for you.

@JP-ll8iy

4 жыл бұрын

I get that!! It’s normal to want companionship. As humans we are designed to be partnered up. To have that connection and to share love with another person, it’s what makes us feel alive, being vulnerable. There’s also nothing wrong with being single. Society dictates too much of what is norm. Times have changed and there are plethora of quality things one can choose and embark on that can be fulfilling as finding the right mate. Think we should just celebrate our differences and carry on. ✌🏽 ❤️

Bella DePaulo is my hero. Everything she says, I've said a million times to my well-meaning married friends and family members--just without the stats. And I always get the feeling they think I'm in denial. Why is it so hard to believe that you can be single AND happy?! My life's far from perfect--gotta work, gotta eat--but none of my stress has anything to do with my relationship status!

@JASanchez

7 жыл бұрын

djdiox ditto.

@GoVocaloider

6 жыл бұрын

djdiox Tell me about it. One of the first arguments they use is that *I must have a reason for avoiding marriage*, when the reality is that *I don't have a reason for wanting to get married*. But apparently, the basic instinct of all people is to go get married and if you don't want to, then something must have scared you off, and you are secretly suffering until they "help" you discover why and solve it. *smh*

@tstarr8314

6 жыл бұрын

"if you don't want to, then something must have scared you off, and you are secretly suffering until they "help" you discover why and solve it." This, while they are often ignoring the issues in their own relationships. I used to think the grass was greener (i.e. I would be happier married) until I looked over the fence at other relationships and saw how things were less than ideal. I still want to get married but I also know that if I'm not happy and content being single then I will not be happy and content being married.

@laraking804

6 жыл бұрын

djdiox Perfectly put! I love that last sentence 👍

@WCqq

6 жыл бұрын

what make you think life is about being happy

The minute I got married I felt robbed and I did not feel whole again until he divorced me. I have never regretted a single moment of being single. Emotionally, I am at peace. I don't regret having children because I knew one day they would be gone and I would be by myself. This still flabbergasts my daughter-in-law.

I'm 62 yo and single and I am oh so happy. I just don't wish to gloat. Marriage sounds like a great way to progress spiritually and emotionally as well as other ways, I just think it's better for me to fly solo with a great community around me. Beautiful talk, Thank you, Bella.

@rachnasingh5121

2 жыл бұрын

I am so happy to read your comment on this video. Would you like to give any suggestions to someone like me who intends to live single forever? Finances, elderly care services, and how to be sure about this aspect of whether or not to be a single parent

Having been on both sides of the fence, in either case a healthy sense of self is key. Being lonely inside a relationship is FAR worse than "maybe" experiencing loneliness as a single.

@mharrod258

5 жыл бұрын

Amen to this!

@RiverLewis

5 жыл бұрын

I will take the initiative here and apologize to Bella DePaulo for the audience in this video. What is wrong with them? This video is hilarious! They didn't even laugh about the ducks getting married! What a bunch of lame ducks! Regardless the speaker is so comfortable because she doesn't need their approval, no surprise there!!

@rowannehagen875

5 жыл бұрын

Agreed. A lonely person inside a marriage is far more socially invisible than a person living by themselves.

@rosybloom5935

5 жыл бұрын

@@RiverLewis I think its also because the majority of the audience is married and unhappy..and therefore not finding the speaker's amusement funny.😂😂

@dragobowman2814

5 жыл бұрын

Exactly ! Being miserable in a relationship is far worse than the fear of being alone .

That audience was dry as hell!

@TheCarrifaery

6 жыл бұрын

looked like a MGTOW embittered toward women crowd who didn't find sweet little grandma funny.

@ravendewynter13

6 жыл бұрын

Mario Coleman boring boring people. She was cracking me up

@annalibra3049

6 жыл бұрын

Gotta give her props for trucking through with humour despite how disagreeable the crowd was. You go girl!!

@bubbalee7105

6 жыл бұрын

I think she bored the audience.

@meeowmeeowmeeow

6 жыл бұрын

Mario Coleman I know right? She was so great, she didn't deserve an audience like this.

Been down all those roads , now I am 63 and this woman totally speaks the truth. If I had gotten married I would have been miserable , lonely , depressed and divorced LOL . But no , here I am in my own home with the things I love and happy as a bee 🐝 🤗

@rachnasingh5121

2 жыл бұрын

I am so happy to read your comment on this video. Would you like to give any suggestions to someone like me who intends to live single forever? Finances, elderly care services, and how to be sure about this aspect of whether or not to be a single parent

Many years ago, Woman’s Day magazine did a huge study and found the happiest people were married men followed by single women, single men, and the most unhappy were married women!

The best part about this video is when it cuts away to the audience and they're all just sitting there frowning and looking very uncomfortable. hahahaha!

@uglaegilsdottir

3 жыл бұрын

Why do you think that is?

@brittneybrisbin744

3 жыл бұрын

@@uglaegilsdottir Maybe they're just not ready to hear what she's saying, or can't relate to it.

@Jayjayjulia

3 жыл бұрын

Imagine how many are currently in unsatisfactory relationships 😂😂 even sitting next to their partner

@colinogorman8279

3 жыл бұрын

🤣🤣🤣

@Anto_81

3 жыл бұрын

I noticed and I frankly don't get why..

Don't assume that because one is married that they are partnered with "The One" --- merely someone sufficient

@doctordavidsam5299

4 жыл бұрын

Is a structure one must Build, despite age and time, we are just Ordinary people, we dont know where to go, we sleep with no hope of assurance of waking up Is faith otherwise we dont sleep., I had love to meet you?

@louisemc3680

4 жыл бұрын

Very good point. How many people mayor their dream partner- not many I bet

@denny7403

3 жыл бұрын

And THAT is more than enough. 🙏❤

@xrc7445

3 жыл бұрын

There's no "the One". You are supposed to marry someone who supports and cares for you and whom you find attractive.

@harveydeutschendorf8964

3 жыл бұрын

I agree with the merely someone sufficient. I believe that most people settle and never really find "The One"

I'm slowly realising that single life is for me. I've been in and out of relationships throughout my adulthood. I am more relaxed when I'm not in a relationship, and my ambitious have always been around learning and adventure, not kids and marriage. As long as I have friends I can rely on, I don't need to be in a romantic partnership. I'm also a Highly Sensitive Person and introvert, so living with someone else is always going to be annoying :D

@renek2913

Жыл бұрын

True, plus there's the internet now so it's easier to make online friends. There's isnt a need for us to find a partner unlike in the past cus times has changed

Single is no longer a lack of options , but a choice. A choice to refuse to let your life be defined by your relationship status but to live every day happily and let your ever after work itself out. -Mandy Hale

So enlightening. When I am with someone I am so stressed, when I am by myself I am really happy and relaxed. Life is hard already, why do I double the hardship? The soceity's brain-washing on how happy couples are is just not true. So glad she is trying to straighten things out.

@romeoreaper6474

4 жыл бұрын

Fu.

After my divorce 23 years ago, I thought that I'd like to get married again. But I never put any effort into meeting anyone. Some time ago I realized that I wasn't willing to put the effort into finding "Mr. Right" because it really didn't bother me to be living on my own. I enjoy living my life on my terms.

"Single people are in control of their own lives". "- yes!

Additionally there is a stigma of being both older and being single.

The ones in the crowd who are married are so easy to spot.

@simonacland9028

3 жыл бұрын

I find myself giggling at this also. Lol

@colinogorman8279

3 жыл бұрын

🤣

Love it! Married life had its perks, but single life is amazing! No stress or worry lines ever cross my brow... And what a freedom, never having to explain yourself or compromise on what you really want, EVER!

@tiadeese

2 жыл бұрын

THIS...💜💜💜

@saramatthews7159

2 жыл бұрын

Oh yesssss I love it

This is one of my favorite TED talks! Single is so much better. Stay single, stay happy!! 🖤

We've been forcibly subscribed to a version of love & monogamy & marriage from before we even know what our favorite color is. She is speaking a truth and I wish I had seen this when I was in high school or college, it would have made me take a step back from mindlessly falling from one relationship to another & feeling innate emptiness when that was not the case. I live alone now (still in another relationship) and I'm finally beginning to see the lies we are collectively brought up on. Love is real; marriage is unnecessary. You are your own keeper before anyone one else. Take time to become who you want to be, regardless of your relationship status.

@mjohnson1741

Жыл бұрын

Well said 👏 namaste.