👍The three words are: “Tell me more” You’re welcome. 💞

@MonthlyCramps

4 жыл бұрын

Thank you. Saved me 20 minutes.

@kixq3379

4 жыл бұрын

Thanks! I spaced out towards the end so when he got to '...3 simple words to make you better... Thank you so much" I was like -- wait what were the 3 words? Lol

@quocatngo9226

3 жыл бұрын

"Tell me more" and "what happened next?"

@lovingatlanta

3 жыл бұрын

Quốc Đạt Ngô - 👍Exactly. 💞

@AkuDao

3 жыл бұрын

@@MonthlyCramps what happened next

I am a firm believer in having PURPOSE in life. We are conditioned to believe we must be happy to be successful at everything in life. 57 years I chased after happiness & I found it at various times over the years, however, life circumstances can change & the happiness has vanished! On the search once again. Purpose is living my life WITH purpose ON purpose! To love, to give, to help others, to make a difference. Happiness will surface ONLY after you are living with purpose & meaning! I was a Psychology major many years ago & while I went into Corporate Mngt rather than the field of Psychology, I have seen over 30 therapists in my time & realized too much time & focus was on my problems & not the solutions. I agree with Positive Psychology as you define, but I don’t believe happiness is the key to life. Live life with purpose & you will experience an incredible life!

I love this, and I was just discussing this with some friends the other day. So many times we listen to someone complain about a problem, and if you're a problem solver like me who likes to get right down to the solution, you want to jump in and give advice. But they didn't ask for advice; they just want a good listener. He's right, we can work out problems on our own just by saying them out loud to someone who's receptive; it makes me think of how I work out my own problems by journaling, by actually just getting those thoughts out in the open. I'm going to work on being a better listener :)

@vernaharris4700

2 жыл бұрын

Good for you.😊❤👍

@alhamdulillah4580

2 жыл бұрын

Decent❤

@kathrynhdao6434

2 жыл бұрын

Ws

Behind those three little words should lie a genuine willingness to understand and sympathize the other person. Forgetting your ego and your turn to speak, but to truly care of the other person's story. Amazing talk :)

@martycolton4596

6 жыл бұрын

Ekaterina Isaeva w

@jfish032

4 жыл бұрын

Ya.. I felt he was way too fixated on the words themself.. it's about the mindset. In fact, in most cases, it's silence that keeps people talking.

Do we have to listen, I was a good listener and realised that people love to talk about they problems and its bogging me down. Today I am sitting with problems after listening to everybody's *stories* and there's nobody around to listen to mine. But you know what the greatest conversation we can have is with God whose always listening.

@user-yh6fe1ks3p

Күн бұрын

Hey please tell me more about your story . I can listen you

3 words: “Tell. Me. More” & “What happened next?” Happiness is found in improving and fulfilled relationships

Thank you very much, Dr. Mark Holder! You are the best! “Tell me more!”

intelligent speech.

Have viewed a few “happiness” TED Talks and this one is absolutely one of the best! It is so true that what made us happy 10 years ago may not make us happy today. And what makes us happy today may not make us happy tomorrow. Happiness is a state of mind.

There's no one I admire to the extent of Dr. Holder, what I've learned from him has changed my life and I'm fortunate to have had the chance to learn from him.

I can’t disagree that listening more would help make my deepest relationships worse. Thanks for sharing!

I love to talk,and a lot of people (i think) like to listen , i think this is because its a chance for them to engage in the company of others without taking chances of 'spilling-the-beans' which might make them feel uncomfortable, or saying something and being challenged. I have written on a paper in my wallet, your three big words,"tell me more" and "what happened next", these words ,apart from being communication tools remind me that the other person who is listening also has an existence of there own and might want to share some of it with a listener. I'm really glad you shared your time with us, and for Ted lectures. Thanks.

A valuable talk with lots of wisdom what happiness is all about, and a simple lesson on how to increase one's own happiness and that of the people around one!

Wait what? The talk is over? No! Don't leave! Tell me more!

@ArthurIdrisov

7 жыл бұрын

And what happend next? XD

@Mal-xz4zu

7 жыл бұрын

Well that worked then :) TEDx Cifs are obviously not the place to make friends.

@user-ob8pw8xy9w

6 жыл бұрын

Arthur Idrisov

@jonathanalturorosarioguzma7847

5 жыл бұрын

Ni

@surapolb7980

4 жыл бұрын

Jonathan Alturo Rosario guzman .Pink Visual

GREAT talk. Friendship is the key to good mental health.

@teasesquezze

7 жыл бұрын

Ms Tango Well you should☺

@lucindawee9043

7 жыл бұрын

Gospel song

@kariahlukemacchan2230

6 жыл бұрын

Actually family, loyalty and honesty superior to "friendship"

These 3 words: "TELL ME MORE" will improve your relationship and happiness. Awesome! Thanks, Dr. Mark Holder for presenting this awesome idea. (3 bonus words are -What happened next? )

Simple but powerful, thanks

One of the best talks i have ever heard

Im so happy i found this ted talk

I'm glad you told us more than just those three words. There really is so much more than just simply making a point. Well done, Mark.

@leedeschaine1315

7 жыл бұрын

Funandconsciousness I

@eugenijusdolgovas9278

4 жыл бұрын

Unless it doesn't work, since people in this age are more interested in facebook, instagram stories and Snapchat. Their sentences are empty and their words are short and self explanatory. "I don't have time", "Wait a second" and the most important one, "I'm fine. Leave me me."

what a profound speech

Excellent and exactly thank you.

One of the most important things that we have forgotten. Listen to others. Thanks!! ( I'm learner English)

Fabulous!!!!

Fantastic.. Simple solution for a quality relationship...

Loved the reference to alexithymia, which affects many people with right brain injury from stroke and trauma. Thanks Dr. Holder for a great talk.

@sundrani1000

7 жыл бұрын

MASAV vide

@sherryscott72

6 жыл бұрын

karen carpenter

@TasosNetPlayer

5 жыл бұрын

@@sherryscott72 Can alexithymia be just a character feature?

@phoenixcreativeslysparrow8336

3 жыл бұрын

@tasos Alexithymia is common in people with autism but not all people who have autism are alexithymic

Perfectly explained the definition of good relationship bravo

This guy is a joy to listen to, and he's funny. Love it.

Thank you , that was really precious .

Excellent! Thank you

Hey Mark, great talk. Enjoyed your clases too. Hope all is well with you. Cheers. Richard

“Tell Me More!” So many people are listening to respond not to relate and hear the other. It’s important to Relate - to Validate the other and allow them to be seen and heard! It shows them they matter and you get to be a part of their growth and sense of BEing witnessed in this life! It will change Your Life Just as it will change theirs!!! 💜 Improve your relationships by Relating and Listening! Do More so you can do Better!

Beautiful Speech indeed@

Extraordinary ❤️

Awesome Talk...

Praise God Thanks for your preachings all Wooooooooooo good work your doing worldwide bless to you in jesus name Greetings from pastor samuel ddembe in Uganda

Awesome advice in regards to finding happiness and promote vs problems and solutions

I am glad I heard this . Iam to help my children that happiness should be on top of our priorities this year an for ever, Thank you Dr.

Thank you soo much It means a lot to us what you said

Amazing!! Thank you!! 2021

Fabulous speech, I learned from you , three words.

This is exactly what we are missing. We don't communicate well with one another. Well, most of us do not. 1) Tell Me More 2) What Happened Next? But you will need to watch the video to understand what these phrases and questions mean.

Amazing good ideas.... I will try it on my friends now ❤❤😁

CHEERS & HAVE A RIDICULOUSLY GREAT LIFE

The limitation with this technique is if you are the only one practicing it. I've always been the listener.. I've always told people that they are worth better and they deserve to be happy. When I needed people to say the same to me and just hear me out when I'm sharing my problem- they just didn't have the time.

@Nikora.Biddle

Жыл бұрын

Cant rely on other people, only rely on yourself, in all things.

I agree with that..imagine a world full of happy people,no war,no money, no society how we have today..more compassion,more understanding,more love,wonderfull . John was brilliant man,it's not important your job/career but your happiness,how you effect other people.,But happy people are not in the interest of the modern world ,who knows will know about what i talk. Stay positive,be loved cuz you always have a choice 😊❤🫠

Thank You for sharing :)

Thank you and special thanks to alert commentators. When he said thank you, I didn't understand what those three words were after all. I wanted to ask him: Tell me more. but I couldn't, I thought I have to listen one more time, then I saw the comments which said, tell me more!

Tema maravilhoso e seu acento estupendo para entender

You know when the 5 minute infomercials come on, hit the back arrow, then the forward arrow and it's gone!!!! Never knew that before!

great job Tip's thanks again rescare acamdy.

Listening is great!

Thank you for your presentation. Well done!

I like the word joy; more than happy. It has more of an up lift an is higher than happy. Happy is a yellow circle with a happy face in it. Joy! Is the bursting for of life like in spring, the sun is out, the grass is greening, trees are leafing and some flowers are popping up bright yellow from the dirt. Intersesting if the pyscho dictionary has no definition of happy or joy; then that must be how the make so much money; rather they should learn joy! and help peple find it; THAT's healing, the rest is most likely sum drugs and come back next week. Most of us don't need pscyo analysis; we need a good faithful friend, we an open up to safely, who'll love us no matter what; and be near with or without an appontment and the only payment they ask for; is receiprocation. Also, happy is tooo much connected with material things; and not an inward sense of being.

Active listening is more than just the words, is how words are said, facial exressions and body language. We need to see into the person.

So interesting, thank you

Happiness is one aspect of a complimentary relationship. As long as you know happiness you'll know unhappiness. As long as you pursue happiness you'll be unhappy. Life works in its own way and not the way "you" want to.

@carolriley6965

4 жыл бұрын

Ferdinand Alexander w. Fe elvis 4wlcis elvs

Several minutes ago I wrote I updated my facebook status to: "Ever have someone you've loved with every piece of you, only to realise that they don't care for you, for so long you gave your love even when obviously they didn't care for you, not even 1 tiny bit! Ask yourself, did you see them ever care for anyone at all, hold on do they even care about themselves? It's clear to me now that if love was the equivalent of music, they were born completely deaf! My feelings, yes they hurt but at least I have the human capacity to feel, do they?", I have been in serval poor and sadly even violent relationships. I fear having been adopted as a child, to sadly a family which I feel did not treat me with love I will never find that close bond. That fear kept me holding on to unhealthy relationships. However, even when those I loved felt no love for me, but as the song say, "As long as I know how to love I no I will survive. Then suddenly I decide maybe I should watch a TEDx talk see if it speaks to me.... OMG

Great talk!

Will try to listen more ... will start with my son Julian 1st ... thank you 😀

Wonderful... Learnt a lot.. Thank you

Great talk. I wished if you would tell us more and more. I didn't feel the time when I was listening.

i have been listenin to the ted talks a long the day while i was playin fornite, and this one was the only could catch me, wonderfull job there bro!

“I AM HAPPY!”

AS A SOCIOPATH. THIS WILL HELP ME RECEIVE MORE INFORMATION. SO I CAN - - - - - - - - UNDERSTAND THEM BETTER.

🕯thank you

That's nice talk.We usually hesitate asking What happen next like in detail or something for other. I want to simply use the three words "Tell me more" and What happened next .Then That will lead to making good relationships with others.I hope that.Thanks

!! Dr. Маrk Holder ! Thank"s a lot !! Is that a clue for a civiliezed human cociety !

Very good talk

very very impressed your speak、thanks。

What a wonderful speech 😋😋😋

So true! Thank you!

What a great talk! I'd love to learn more about the Positive Psychology movement after watching this video. Interesting concept of linking happiness to our external relationships rather than making it purely about an internal state of mind. Makes sense to me.

quality of friendship not quantity of friends

3 ONLY WAYS TO BE HAPPY)))) LOVE YOURSELF LOVE OTHERS AND LOVE GOD....

I can't wait

Great Talk. ... Thank you

@xiaolially2395

5 жыл бұрын

te;;

Amazing talk! 🌙

Thank you! I will use this practical information and I know it will improve my relationships.

@shwettak

7 жыл бұрын

Did this improve your relation lady?

@piyushsingh4869

7 жыл бұрын

Lotus Blossom did it?

@HeartEvolutions

7 жыл бұрын

Yes, I spend more time listening and less time interrupting. Who says, "tell me more?" Only someone who is interested in what your saying. "What happened next?" Shows the speaker you are listening. The more time I spend listening, the more information I retain for the next visit. I responded to my child's one word reply with, "how exciting! Tell me more" and to my great surprise he offered more information. That wouldn't have happened had I not responded with "tell me more".

@maureengannon1647

7 жыл бұрын

Lotus Bl

Me too ! I just want to be Happy !!

Real talk

From a country boys perspective that was the meat and taters bit I still want the rest of the meal. Great message

This is very very inspiring speech. Especially about positive psychology. By the way, I use his 3 words all the time to people around me. "Tell me more. What happened next?" That's why they love to talk to me. *But I use these 3 words because I don't want to open up to others.* Sharing my life is too scary. Therefore I just close myself up inside because listening to others is easier and safer for me. Dr.Holder should have considered people like me too and figure out how to help.

Yes.. Tell us more..

I'm 35, never had a girlfriend let alone a wife. I have 2 really good friends that I only see about twice a year. I am almost always happy and smiling. Wanna know why? Because no other exists outside my mind and I am the creator of the universe and so are you. But also I am. That's why I smile.

@Spideynw

4 жыл бұрын

"I have 2 really good friends". Nuff said.

I have joy of the Lord ..happiness is fleeting js

Tell me more, tell me more and what happened next!!!! Amen!!

They laugh more, they're happier

Natalie Cole has a song w- Lyrics "The greatest thing is just to love, and BE loved, in return"

@thaislalita4635

3 жыл бұрын

Amazing. ♥

@joshuamanevitz1530

3 жыл бұрын

Nat King Cole , I believe !

great talk. tnx

You can be unhappy even the whole world loves you. Happiness comes from you not from others. Let life go through you and dont try to grasp it you will become fulfilled, free and happy Ps. I love you (i mean it:D)

Positive psychology focus on what makes you happy rather than focusing on what makes you unhappy

Amazing ❤

What if your stuck being the listener and never have a chance to be the speaker because your always listening and making sure they get to express what they are feeling.

@susanhagan5371

3 жыл бұрын

Great point, I tend to be the listener already, too, and sometimes under-express myself. What we really want is a healthy balance, and the skill and dynamic flexibility to adopt either role in the moment.

Everyone needs to read the book by Leslie Sann "Life Happens. What are YOU Going to Do About It?" A practical handbook with Powerful tools to access your inner resources and Transform Your Life.

Even typing can be addictive. We learn to push the keys and something is produced. Same for PC's, texting, email etc.

Tell me more, so I can tell all of my stories and release my pain💗

All is good and Dandy Dr Mark. I enjoyed thoroughly your talk. But, when do we use those 3 words? I wish you could go on a little longer. Tank you so much. Tanya (73 year old granny) Sydney Australia.

Impressive speaker....these three word works. Tell me more. And what happened next. With These word,we respect others feeling......nice talking

Positive psychology is great and yet we don't have an economic operating system which is coherent with its findings at all. Until we have an economy founded on what truly makes us 😊 we'll have to contend with the many unintended consequences of structures mismatched with true human well being and flourishing.

@summondadrummin2868

7 жыл бұрын

...makes us Happy.

@BellaLeoLicorice

7 жыл бұрын

Tell me more...

@meganwade5772

7 жыл бұрын

Summondadrumminmuziku seki turovic

@summondadrummin2868

7 жыл бұрын

For examples look up the books Happiness Economics by Mark Anielski and Sacred Economics by Charles Eisenstein. Watch the first section (not so much the second) of the video Moving Forward by Peter Joseph which goes over some very credible science related to what we now know about human nature.

@xredb

7 жыл бұрын

because the government wants to control us and independent thinking will make us question this fucked up system they have forced among us