Join the *Manifest Your Man* program and get *coached by Mat Boggs TODAY* : www.bravethinkinginstitute.com/love-relationships/resources/mym/offer/strategy-session

"you can never say the wrong thing to the right person." If he runs, he did you a big favor!

@snowgoddessmissy7781

2 жыл бұрын

I wld sing n dance my way home bcoz I wl hv no regrets of a lifetime, than to get nightmare living w such a wimpy guy.Better than long suffering pain.

@LinkzAnimEditz

2 жыл бұрын

That quote is a whole lie lol

@aniakwagrace3512

Жыл бұрын

Hahahaha, he did you a big favor wow!!!!!!

@goddessoflove4323

Жыл бұрын

Exactly!

When you’re on a date and a man says ‘I’m not looking for anything serious right now’. Going into a date with such a low expectation of the outcome, or expecting just sex and nothing more speaks volumes about a man’s character.

@redaattia6565

2 жыл бұрын

I totally agree with you! Furthermore why aren’t they worried about such expressions, but we have to worry about anything that might scare him off, our level of interest, commitment, exclusivity, as far as I’m concerned! If you want my body? What are you willing to let go of……..

@CountryTownSounds

2 жыл бұрын

That is true but it's good for you because you know their intentions right then and there and can choose to leave and move on to someone who has an intention more similar to yours.

@CrystalDatingCoach

2 жыл бұрын

Translation. I wanna have fun with you until I meet the lady...I really like.

@lizamartin4705

2 жыл бұрын

Yes just walk away then. If you really like him woman think they'll change him but the only way to change him is to walk away and ignore him bc if he can't get any unless he commits he'll rethink that or if he likes you he will then chase you.

@Meira750

2 жыл бұрын

Absolutely! I had that happen and we're both 75, haha. It was gross at first but when I thought of a reasonably attractive (superficially) older man looking for just a booty call and choosing a 75 year old woman, it became funny and ridiculous. An invitation turned into just, "come over and we'll go to bed." "Uh, no, thanks but no thanks." He wote a book which could have been a good story but was pretty mediocre, yet it revealed a lot about him and that left no doubt. I knew I wasn't misreading (pun intended) him and his intentions.

It's a turn off when men are obsessive over you the first date and everything is focused on sex . It's annoying I just prefer to be friends first

@99craziichick

3 жыл бұрын

Same

@wendydrummond7395

3 жыл бұрын

Totally agree when they say i live y I in the 1second on social message then say send me iTunes cards it call block him

@milagrosbazan533

3 жыл бұрын

they are scammers for sure, haha

@garycrossman9067

3 жыл бұрын

Hey Gia. How are you doing? Well it’s just right that you try to become friends first , at least get to know each other before pulling the sex plug.

@garycrossman9067

3 жыл бұрын

Will like to text you sometime, let be friends.

Yeah, a huge turn off is when men say "women are crazy". That statement is very immature to say the least.

@alleycatalog

3 жыл бұрын

My narc ex said this often. He made women crazy with his self extreme unawareness.

@TiffanyLeClair

3 жыл бұрын

“Women are crazy” or telling a passionate woman to “calm down” are on the same level..... just. don’t. ever. That’s like lighting a fuse but not expecting an explosion: naive and downright unintelligent. It blows my mind that some people (I’ve heard men and women say it, hence gender neutral) say those words assuming they are correct/reasonable and somehow don’t expect to get a drastic reaction! Lol! 🤷‍♀️🤦‍♀️

@MAGNAY1

3 жыл бұрын

a lot of woman do have those moments that do seem crazy to us blokes, when we see those moments we think that everything is going fine then just completely flips for no reason. woman don't see those moments as crazy and perfectly justified so by saying that it's almost feels like a put down when most men don't mean it that way. so yeah that women are crazy should be saved for the guys nights and not said directly to them, that's my opinion anyway.

@kdphotos4691

3 жыл бұрын

@@MAGNAY1 - if you call women "crazy," then you have low self esteem. Also, YOU do not speak for all men and there is no "us." Work on your self esteem. Curiously, Robert Smith of The Cure describes his wife he has been in love with since he was 14 as "mental." Low quality men are scared of interesting women. They call them "crazy." High quality men see the strength in women who aren't average and dull.

@Mia199603

3 жыл бұрын

@@kdphotos4691 that's true. Passionate assertive women with strong opinions are called crazy because weak men want women to be bland and obedient so that these men can feel better about themselves. A man is humiliated at work? He's gonna go unload his frustration on his quiet girlfriend, she's no threat to him, he isn't scared to stand up to her like he is to his boss. He's gonna shame her for being emotional because he is so ashamed of his own emotions, too scared to show them to the world. An insecure man believes he can't keep an interesting woman at his side, he needs to abuse and manipulate a weak woman, he needs to be in control. A strong woman won't submit to him, he would need to fight for her, bring something to the table, she knows what she wants and she won't settle for any bullshit below her. Now a truly confident man is proud to be with a woman like this. She chose him of all men, he deserves her and she deserves him. No inequality, no trivial fight for power. King and Queen of their own land, fuck the insecure peasants and their petty fights.

Correction: narcissists go after empaths, not necessarily someone with low self esteem.

@michellemoffett9458

2 жыл бұрын

Very true I'm an empath and my ex is a covert narcissist.

@BooDotBoo

2 жыл бұрын

Narcissists go after whomever lets them in.

@Lisah707

2 жыл бұрын

Yup! I was recently engaged to one!

@oliviarose3513

2 жыл бұрын

Or maybe "empaths" are just people pleasers motivated by a low self esteem, and call themselves empaths to try to make themselves feel better........

@makeupboss3568

2 жыл бұрын

Sounds familiar. It’s a huge” deal breaker “ my husband and I are just that . I’m the empath , he’s the narcissist ( although this flaw has been corrected lately… ) and we have managed to stay married. It’s amazing how this works, he’s a crazy Leo … but he’s a huge “ pussycat “ … I’m the empathetic Aries , my nature has been through a lot in our life together… but I think it’s because I’m a passionately “ caring “ person, and it kind turns him on

“Let’s see where it goes”... yup, it won’t go anywhere

@ellebee9864

2 жыл бұрын

Yes, a time-waster.

@tessamarie8698

2 жыл бұрын

sure lets see where it goes but im not offering my body as your sexual ground scape while your figure it out. That's the perfect response.

Girls pls just do you, pls say what you want to say. Pretending being someone else, and not being natural will not help you find love. Just be you and you will find someone who is not triggered by who you really are. And will love you for who you really are! You are all amazing! Never let anyone say the opposite! ❤

@geniaamponga3951

2 жыл бұрын

👌🏾 well said!

@Cheryl_L0utitt

2 жыл бұрын

EXACTLY what I was thinking..Sounds like a LOT of work having to watch what you say..

@ines.1999

2 жыл бұрын

@@GoddessBlessYou i don't care be yourself don't pretend to be something else that's it ;)

@zippyblessed839

2 жыл бұрын

Exactly

@michelemaliano7860

2 жыл бұрын

I’ve been thinking this every time I watch these videos.

What scares me off are men who say women are all the same and are bitter about how an ex treated him.

@BBGshop7

3 жыл бұрын

It should be a red flag because he hasn't healed yet.

@kemi.a.2000

3 жыл бұрын

@@BBGshop7 maybe he needs/needed a babysitter/ comforter.🤣🤣

@BBGshop7

3 жыл бұрын

@@kemi.a.2000 🤮 . That disgusts me.

@arturo165

2 жыл бұрын

Yes. Most females I put in the sex only zone are like that.

@FM-ir2nq

2 жыл бұрын

@@kemi.a.2000 😂😂😂

If he was not ready to fall in love why was he spending the night with her? People rush into things rather than letting relationship grow. These days I see people embracing celibacy more which is so good. I don't have to sleep with you to know you enough to fall in love with you.

@BBGshop7

3 жыл бұрын

Well said.

@reginawoess4928

3 жыл бұрын

He will always have sex with you unlike a lot of women we want more than sex. I never do until I'm in lovee

@Purpleaggie05

3 жыл бұрын

That’s exactly what I was thinking when he talked about his friend!?! For real, that was his friend’s fault not her’s. He should’ve made clear his intentions before getting into bed with her, if he didn’t want her to get mixed signals!

@kimgordon3695

3 жыл бұрын

A lasting relationship is built progressively fr the ground up. Booty call is the top down. & fleeting.

@Silbusia

3 жыл бұрын

That's really well said. Also I noticed that those who aren't willing to wait for you were never really interested in you, they only thought they had a chance to use you and quickly leave, without even trying to get to know you.

1. “You’re perfect” (scary being put on a pedestal) 2. “My ex was a total narcissist” (makes him think you aren’t a good judge of character) 3. “You’re actually normal! That’s so refreshing.” (makes him wonder why you attract/go out with losers/don’t have good options) 4. “I’m bored. What are you doing?” (short term it works because it’s a ‘come rescue me’, but it indicates you don’t have a lot going on in life and are boring) 5. Drama dump truck - when you just vent all the negatives from your day or life on him Personal note- I agree with 1,3,4, and 5. Anyone who knows anything about psychopaths and narcissists know they are masters at manipulation and initially act like super awesome partners. Number one is scary to women as well coming from men for the exact same reasons. Number 3 I don’t have a reaction too because I cannot imagine saying it. Number 4 sounds awful and I would not want it said to me, and saying it to a guy sounds like, “hey,, I’m bored, and at least you are better than nothing at all.” I mean, what the heck? Number 5 I feel is very wise. I also hate getting dumped on.

Narcissists also prey on empathetic people

@vibekes2416

3 жыл бұрын

That's right 😊 And there are so many different types of narcissists. Malignant, covert etc.

@audra1976oliver

3 жыл бұрын

Truuuth

@wagendorf31

2 жыл бұрын

Any woman who has been ensnared by a narcissist, just know it’s not your fault. These are experts who manipulate that can fool any woman at first. It’s because you are a high-quality woman that you were targeted. If anyone won’t date you for that reason, then be thankful they ran.

@TaraHower

2 жыл бұрын

@@wagendorf31 amen

@kerridevol3018

2 жыл бұрын

Agreed don’t listen to this guy. Not all these dating coaches are experts.

I don't like it when guys boast about themselves all the time, and brag about stuff. I don't know how to respond, and also I find it super annoying. Humility is a quality I really like.

@BBGshop7

3 жыл бұрын

😅Yeah, I totally get what you mean. Men who are conceited make my stomach feel sick sometimes lol! (Huge turn off) I thing the best approach here is ok just don't even feed into it. At least I dont. A little confidence is fine, though. He may be trying to impress you. Politely let him know that he doesn't have anything to prove, and that you would like to get to know him, (that is if he hasn't already caused you to lose attraction by going over the top). Some guys still need to mature, and it's ok to politely decline going out with them again. 😊

@anawonka

3 жыл бұрын

i always say, for instance if they say i want to buy a jaguar. i would say wow show off!

@emmal1138

3 жыл бұрын

Totally agree. I was talking to someone a few weeks back and all he did was talk about his TWO WHOLE jobs and how much he earned!! But strangely enough, his 2nd job was delivering Chinese takeaways which he apparently earned £30 an hour for!!! I'm not sure how as I kind of got bored and forgot to listen. Anyway, we video timed and he showed me around his whole house which wasn't a mansion or that special and looked messy and he was renting!!!! So I pulled back a bit and a few nights later I was going to my best friends for drinks. He asked what I was doing so I told him. He said 'oh feel free to call me for a natter tonight. I'll be working but I'll try to answer'. 🤣 So I replied 'I'm busy tonight, so maybe speak tomorrow, goodnight'. So he put back 'I'm partial to drunk texts 😜'. I put 'I don't ever drunk text men I've not met, I've got better things to do'. He put 'I'd like to think I'm top of your list now though'. Some are so effing deluded. 🤣 He got no reply. He texted me 3 times that night. He got no reply. He texted me last week to 'check in'. He got no reply. He will never get a reply. Avoid men like this ladies. Dusties in disguise 🤣👋

@phathiswasompa9983

3 жыл бұрын

I left my Ex because of that 😂😂😂

What men shouldn't say on a first date: -Talk or focus the talk on sex. -Say that they can seduce any woman -Talk excessively about the ex or exes. -Ask your credit score -Ask to spend the weekend or getaway weekend or going on a cruise "Ask to go to the adult toy store after the date -Tell you that they are loud during sex, so you need to warn your family living with you about that. -Focus conversation on money, how much they make and how much they can spend on you. -Make sexist jokes or sexist comments.

@JVanProduction

2 жыл бұрын

100% agreed! I had a date where he was asking me if I would ever go an a weekend adventure. I said yes because I am an adventurous person. Then his body language changed and he was excited about my answer. I wasn’t quite sure as to why his demeanor changed that much. Thought it over and then understood. I was going to mention the same about how sex is the center of the conversation when you literally just met the person. But, in other words, that’s basically all that they are interested in. 🙄

@suzanneplatt3258

2 жыл бұрын

💯 I couldn’t agree more!

@Abe-rz1nm

2 жыл бұрын

Ugh yes and talk about themselves NON STOP during the entire date and never ask anything about you.

@kokolatte825

Жыл бұрын

Yes, guys who talk about how much they make are weird and insecure. They are trying to lure you with their paycheck rather than their personality. 🚩

@fubytv731

Жыл бұрын

I wouldn't mind for a getaway weekend. I mean, as long as we're really doing a lot of activities, not just having sex...A man who's adventurous and has a lot of ideas to have fun is a plus for me.

The number one comment that made me run like all hell on the first date was, “I want you to be the mother of all my children.”

@wamunguliliane2389

2 жыл бұрын

Haaa your comment kills me you no need children

@snowgoddessmissy7781

2 жыл бұрын

Exactly...I wonder if he needed a nanny or a mother for his children or a new relationship?

@lisacranmer8005

2 жыл бұрын

@@snowgoddessmissy7781 Lol . yeahhhhhh I should have run..

@loref4552

2 жыл бұрын

Lmao

What scares me and push me away definitely, is when he knows that I am having a surgery and never call either before or after to have my news

I had a guy tell me, '' I want the next woman I date to be the one I marry'' on a FIRST date. Don't say that shit to someone you don't even know. Honestly it wreaked desperation and I was so turned off.

@carmeltonedbarbie1747

3 жыл бұрын

No. Are you really that naive? Men only say this to have sex. They smash then dash. No man is in a big hurry to get married. Even if he wants to. There's too many other women to pick from. It's a great scheme. And it works on women who are not genuinely self assured.

@snowgoddessmissy7781

2 жыл бұрын

Same here..hate it why it's like I am a doe for his sexual meal..n obviously tis guy u hv got a motive.

@LilyOfTheTower

Жыл бұрын

Art of communication. I would have responded with "ugh wouldnt it be nice if it were that easy" and then got into a discussion about dating or relationships. To be smug and think "eww" just sounds cold and like you're hard to please.

A big turn off is when men make statements like they totally “get” you after a couple of dates. Um, you don’t even know my middle name!! Or when men say things like, “I can picture this working long term” before they have a chance to know you. Tip for men: ask questions, be interested in understanding your woman...don’t just say what you think she might want to hear. :)

@hjtres7261

3 жыл бұрын

They've created an unrealistic and unreliable image of you. Be careful bc you dont know what "category" they've put you in with this statement.

@Mia199603

3 жыл бұрын

That's creepy and ends poorly. You'll come out of it an emotional wreck once his delusional fantasy of his own making wears off and he blames you for "leading him on" and "not being who he thought you were". You don't matter in his equation at all, he doesn't care for your feelings and your true self.

Narcisists don't prey on ppl with low selfworth, not interesting. They prey on ppl with good selfworth and selfconfidence so that they can break it down. They tear you apart, thát is the challenge! Thought you should know this 🤗

@munstermum4328

3 жыл бұрын

YUP!

@judith5128

3 жыл бұрын

Yes indeed. That was my mom, bless her soul and may she rest in peace🙏

@dustylong

3 жыл бұрын

@@judith5128 Sorry to hear about your mom 😔. I wish the best for you in moving forward!

@judith5128

3 жыл бұрын

@@dustylong thanks for kind words. By the grace of God I survived and am grateful for experiences that helped me have compassion for those with mental illness. (It was definitely rough growing up with a mother who was undiagnosed ,at the time, with borderline personality disorder)

@dustylong

3 жыл бұрын

@@judith5128 I can only imagine how tough that must have been. But yes, you are a survivor! And you even find it in your heart to have compassion. Good for you and good luck!!

Men who are too demanding scare me off. I like my own space. Also I would never accept a man telling me what to do. I like to do my own thing.

@marciajohnson339

3 жыл бұрын

So do I

I've never uttered the words "you're perfect" to a male in my life 😂

@ameraagao3232

3 жыл бұрын

Saying that sounds creepy 😁🤣

@marquittacollier2225

3 жыл бұрын

Me either. I haven't seen Mr. Perfect ...yet.

@marylcampbell2409

2 жыл бұрын

Same here lol i mean hello🤣

@marylcampbell2409

2 жыл бұрын

@@ameraagao3232 🤣🤣

@ThePratima89

2 жыл бұрын

😂😂😂

Turn off when a man says that he will never marry again 😂 on the first date

Narcissists can be overt or covert. Sometimes it's hard to tell until you get to know them better.

@zoraidacastro5403

2 жыл бұрын

EXACTLY

To summarize these are the 5 things that scares men off. 1- 2:57 "You're perfect." 2- 5:00 "My ex was a total narcissist." 3- 6:12 "You're actually normal, That's so refreshing." 4- 9:00 "I'm bored, what are you doing." 5- 10:30 "The drama dump truck."

@lalaocampo1150

3 жыл бұрын

Thank you!

@onm9128

2 жыл бұрын

Love & light sweetie

A man pushes away me if all he talks about on our first date is, how beautiful I am, and when he shows too much excitement.

I agree with a previous comment. Start coaching modern men to step up, be responsible, protect, guide and help a woman trust so a relationship can grow.

If my man will show no empathy....like whenever Im sad & he will totally disregard it...and Im totally off to that guy😅

@TheMagnay

3 жыл бұрын

this one is actually more society doing and not entirely his fault. as a men I can tell you that from kids, men are encouraged to burry their feelings instead of expressing them. while this is changing and younger men 30s and lower do show some feelings, they still have to bottle it up most the time. because of that men don't fully understand their own feelings all the time and have trouble expressing them. I do agree it is a turn off and women do need that but it is something we have to learn as adults or late teens and by then it can get hard.

Sorry Matt, I agree the “you’re perfect” comment is a big red flag, but the “she might be falling in love with me and I like her but I’m not there yet, so I will break up with her now so I won’t have to break her heart if I never catch up to her emotionally” is pure BS! All that really says is this guy hasn’t developed emotionally enough for a mature relationship. There are no guarantees in a relationship (usually someone gets hurt at some point) and it’s very rare for both parties to progress emotionally at the exact same rate. So if her liking him too much (I’m not talking obsessive) scares him away, then she’s better off without him anyway. Let some other lucky guy who recognizes her value benefit from the woman who’s confident and expresses her feelings openly and honestly.

@alleycatalog

3 жыл бұрын

Right? I had no idea I had to walk on so many eggshells around men. If they are ready to go to bed together they are ready for some playful banter.

@TiffanyLeClair

3 жыл бұрын

I wonder if it’s the weight of the word “perfect” is the issue... because no one is... it’s unattainable. It’s a lot of pressure too early. “Perfect for me” is a bit less abrasive, but that’s an implied statement that’s easier to digest after you’ve gotten to know someone on a deep level for more than a few months, let alone days or weeks. I’m thinking out loud.... But I very much understand what you mean with the implied reaction... instead of jumping to conclusions, have an adult (albeit vulnerable/awkward) conversation with that partner to discuss... because most people don’t know how to properly articulate themselves and don’t elaborate more than the 2 words they said versus the proper meaning to that person behind those words. Having emotionally intelligent conversations with a person, romantic or not, can be hard for someone... but allowing them to elaborate before jumping to conclusions is a decision that needs to be made on whether or not someone feels like the other is worth the “trouble” (for lack of a better term). I digress.... “Perfect” is a facade no one can live up to, either way.... it’s unattainable.

@evelynsantana7156

3 жыл бұрын

It doesn’t take a lifetime to know if a person may or not work out for you. If someone is not ready for a serious relationship, stay dating and avoid these “emotional words”!

@rawmaterial7986

3 жыл бұрын

Girl you said it best

@garycrossman9067

3 жыл бұрын

Truth is you’re just exact at your words love that ❤️, it takes an emotionally mature mind to be in a relationship, not a childish and chicken hearted way of responding to an emotional energy . I personally do love it when I see my lady shoots her feelings towards my direction. For me it’s a plus that my efforts are being recognized and reciprocated. But though i’m single right at this moment.. It’ll be nice to be loved just that way. ❤️

Turn off is when the guy, upon first meeting, wants to go in for a kiss w/o even completing the first date. Idk if I’m gonna like you, why would I wanna kiss a perfect stranger first?!

It scares me when a man asks me for money. Especially my lover.

@abbyroad5289

3 жыл бұрын

It should! Don't do it.

@blessingrogers7068

3 жыл бұрын

Same here It's really makes me so mad

@Mayfloweralways

3 жыл бұрын

@Epic Gaming because it usually means the guy is faking feelings to get access to your money. I found it to be very true. Very good men who love a woman, they would feel like a burden by taking money. They won’t ask.

@SP-pt9bq

3 жыл бұрын

This is very true.

@annndugu1032

3 жыл бұрын

oh my, i hate it

Narcissists choose people who appear better than them. Then they systematically tear them apart. The section in this video about women "choosing" narcissists and having low self-esteem really leans into victim-blaming and it's terribly inaccurate.

No manners or politeness. Example being overly blunt on what he doesn’t like or bashing people whether it be the waiter/waitress or an ex, coworkers etc...

@BBGshop7

3 жыл бұрын

Yes! Ikr.. dates should be positive.

@jnorway7295

2 жыл бұрын

My ex-husband had horrible table manners, shovel big forkfuls of his food into his mouth (how embarrassing), was rude to waiters, boast how great 45 was (wtf?), then leave a 20-25% tip to look good & would get up from the table at a nice restaurant & walk to the door by himself to wait for me. Outside, he'd walk 10 paces ahead to the car. If his friends were with us, he'd still have awful manners & eat super fast but would wait til everyone was finished then all leave the table at the same time.

It’s not just Communication, it’s COMPREHENSION.

If he says " I am not like other guys you can trust me " just after knowing him for few days. It scares the shit out of me. Why does he think that way, I wasn't even on the same space.

@snowgoddessmissy7781

2 жыл бұрын

Never believe a man who said he is honest, sincere w integrity.I came across online but never meet any of them n they r always a fake.

A man that tells me "His broke" That scares me. 😣😱

@sophielorraine4654

3 жыл бұрын

@@cahilpeterson4978 Ok let me evaluate on this. When a man is constantly in hardship/broke that I'm not for. Love ain't gonna feed u or pay the Bill's unless that man or woman you love is financially good. 🙌🙏

@sophielorraine4654

3 жыл бұрын

@@cahilpeterson4978 Of course I understand that life happens. But come on Cahil. Broke year on year out. Uhh uhh! 😒👎🏽

@sophielorraine4654

3 жыл бұрын

@@cahilpeterson4978 All well and good thankyou. Hope u r too? 🌝🙌

@zoraidacastro5403

3 жыл бұрын

Broken... Run.

Had to comment part way through, you don't 'choose'' a narcissist, they choose you. I agree that you needn't share this info about an ex but I'm guessing that you have never been in a relationship with one. Narcissists choose empathic people who are kind, their polar opposites. Low self esteem and poor judgment aren't really factors here, perhaps men who think this way need more education :)

@phoenixbird4435

3 жыл бұрын

You are absolutely spot on they choose you. I was married to one and my life was all about controlling me and our children. It’s certainly was a big lesson I learnt. To be honest with you guys, I never heard that term narcissist before didn’t know what it meant until if of my dear friends described my ex he was one. I looked it up and he fit all the bill. They are truly manipulative people, vampires they suck out all the positive energy in you, happiness gone and you are left feeling worthless. I can’t emphasise enough to all good human being out there to steer clear from narcissist people they are dangerous and damage you mentally for a very long time for you to recover from one

@margaretb2269

3 жыл бұрын

Yes I agree with you that they choose you or rather hunt you down. And like Phoenix Bird explained many off us were not even aware of the word narcissist until the description, character /personality of the person fits the word. To add to that it when you excape that you realise what a mess and hell you were in. Phoenix gave perfect description. They try to destroy your soul and you take a long time to come through . Those who have not been or exposed to one will never quite understand. Maybe that's a good thing too,cause to understand means you have to had been in that mess.

@phoenixbird4435

3 жыл бұрын

Margaret B, thank you Magaret for understanding what’s it like to be in a relationship with a narcissist. I’ve been out of this relationship coming up 4 years now. I question everything and constantly battling with myself as in self worth. Learning each day and slowly getting stronger wanting to be happy and that happiness starts within me first before I can let another man in my life. God bless you and stay safe always x

@margaretb2269

3 жыл бұрын

@@phoenixbird4435 you go girl 👍, keep strong 💪. You can do it! because what you experienced was real. You are just regaining who you were a strong confidence woman. Remember that is what he tried to steal from you. But he can't. Just dig deep, it is there and trust yourself. Don't be afraid of mistakes as you step forward. Everyone makes those.

@phoenixbird4435

3 жыл бұрын

Margaret B God bless you xx

What I don't agree with is that women "choses" narcissists. Many narcissists doesn't show their character and are really good and manipulate about it, sometimes for years before the facade starts to fall, and then it's too late. You're already in a relationship and have been skillfully manipulated to make excuses for the guy or you even feel sorry for him and then feel guilty for that. So I think you should read a bit more about narcissism in relationships - because it could literally happen to anyone- no matter how high self-esteem or how you're normally very good at judging character. By judging women or men in that way is not helping anyone but maybe the narcissist by the woman may think in her manipulated mind that it will only happen again because of her judgement if she believes the content on that in this video, and therefore gives up and doesn't seek the help she needs or never decides to leave and go into uncertainty. Often it CAUSES low self-esteem. It's like being traumatized by a really bad bully that you trusted or being deeply betrayed. It's a type of trauma that should not be attributed to her as a person. Or he as a person. So in this area, it seems you actually have som learning to do Mathew. I like your content, but I had to speak my mind about this, escpecially to other watcher's so they don't misunderstand these mechanisms, and maybe also helps a man that thinks like that, to actually think more correctly.

@kathleen3292

3 жыл бұрын

Emma Larsson Thank you.

@phoenixbird4435

3 жыл бұрын

You have explained that so well my dear I was with mine over 20+. I didn’t see his true colours until it was to late and the damage was done.It’s only when you step out of your marriage and look back do you then see the red flags 🚩 and all along your gut instinct was telling you he is not good for you. The old saying love is blind well those words I will never forget as it’s so true.

@kslash_lady

3 жыл бұрын

I agree. You don’t choose a narcissist. They seek you out. And I’ve ended up with one because I used to have low self esteem.

@phoenixbird4435

3 жыл бұрын

@@kslash_lady Hi Kelli. You are absolutely spot on they choose there victims.. you aren’t alone hun as I to had low self esteem. Hope you are looking after yourself because you are important and deserve a man who will treat you with the utmost respect and care, showering you with love and protection. He is out there somewhere your soulmate x Take care hun x

@kdphotos4691

3 жыл бұрын

Well said.

Yeah when men say "you're perfect." Too much pressure. I get it.

The thing that scares me away from men is the obsessive texting, or getting angry if I don’t text back right away. This happens a lot, most of them I haven’t even met yet. We matched on a dating site and decided to start talking further. That sends bad vibes 😝

@snowgoddessmissy7781

2 жыл бұрын

Same here..esp those who hv been married b4 They expect to bring their past expectations into the present.

@hillaryschulz8112

2 жыл бұрын

Same here and currently dealing with that now..

@snowgoddessmissy7781

2 жыл бұрын

Careful if he don't vdo chat w u or meet up w u..tats a sign he is not real n preying on u to scam..Nigerian scammer syndicate operation modus...they hv a big syndicate of many hundreds n hundreds of them all over the place...

@fubytv731

Жыл бұрын

As long as they communicate well, I wouldn't mind a lot of communication.

Just be yourself, you can't lose what is meant for you, if you can't be open and honest with someone then it's pointless, you will drive yourself crazy by trying to follow all the dos and don't in dating, if your bored say it, if u we in a bad a relationship talk about it when ur comfortable, just say what u mean and mean what you say forget the rest, there is no one size fits all, guys will see through you if your constantly second guessing yourself, the right one will come along and stay for the right reasons you don't need to worry about anything else.

@TheMagnay

3 жыл бұрын

yes but sometimes bad habits and unfixed self esteem issues can end relationships with compatible people before they even begin. you have to be a great person first before you can get a partner. if you just say it then you won't get your guy.

Hate when men dont ask anything about you and instead talk mostly about themselves. Makes them seem uninterested in the woman they are dating and more like sex and codependency is all they want

@dashiajames1882

3 жыл бұрын

I hate when men always wanna initiate sex soooo quickly. Like on the 4th date or something. Makes me think "this guy is crazy to initiate sex so quickly"....Get to know me more. Stop thinking that way.

@dashiajames1882

3 жыл бұрын

That just plain egotistical...!! What's odd, some men don't even realize they're doing that.

@terrimontanez8291

3 жыл бұрын

Yes Yes Yes... Most men I've met only talk about themselves and never ask anything about you... shows me they are not interested in getting to know you so best thing is dont waste your time.

@WW-is9pm

3 жыл бұрын

True. Had a b/f who was like that. Chatted about everything except me.

When you ask your date what their dreams or goals are and then they don't ask you the same question. That is a huge red flag for me. No second date.

"You're the woman of my dreams". Especially on the first or second date. Dude, you hardly know me! Lol

@rosiemelo8629

2 жыл бұрын

This happened to be on the first date and that really was a BIG NO for me!

When he says "you are mine, I'll never let anyone else have you. I'll never let you go."

"You are perfect" I hate too. I'm not and when they realise everything changes. My ex it is actually a covert narcissist and I'm embarrassed of telling people what I put myself through. That's why I'm paying a psychologist.

@phoenixbird4435

3 жыл бұрын

Alice C. I hear what you saying but Alice you have nothing to be ashamed of. He has done wrong not you

@phoenixbird4435

3 жыл бұрын

Marylee Macpherson stay strong Marylebone. Believe it or not this has actually helped me to writing it down here.. you have no idea what else my ex husband did to not only me but to my children, especially my eldest daughter his stepdaughter which he denies and the worst thing is he got away with it. Even after this he has contact with his biological son. It tearing me up inside.

@phoenixbird4435

3 жыл бұрын

My apologies for mis spelling your name x

@b.jerelljones7312

2 жыл бұрын

Unfortunately it happens in life. That’s how we all learn and grow, so we don’t waste time on the same type of people.

@Meira750

2 жыл бұрын

Don't be embarrassed. We were all young and stupid once. You were smart enough to make him your ex. Own that now, not the mistake of choosing him at first. It was the humiliation that kept you with him. It ends now. Speaking from experience. Correction; you should own the mistake but then get rid of it and past it. You're free! Rejoice in that.

I want a man who isn't scared by anything, brave for me, I wanna say everything that I can say and to know he'd love me, protect me and respect me no matter what.

@jordanmicheal4148

3 жыл бұрын

Hello R❤

@TheMagnay

3 жыл бұрын

good luck, you will be waiting for a while. any good bloke will stick by you if you say the wrong thing from time to time but no bloke will respect you no matter, what unless he doesn't respect himself.

@Beautytrends77

2 жыл бұрын

You can never say the wrong thing to the right man!!! I had to learn this

@WhiteAngelLovesEarth

2 жыл бұрын

@@TheMagnay I'm a bit over 33 yrs , I'm just gonna try something with someone who's madly serious about me, if I like him too of course.

@WhiteAngelLovesEarth

2 жыл бұрын

@@TheMagnay men in my country aren't educated when is about women, they're very condescending about women, anyway...my father ''prepared'' me well for life...insulted me so much 😁 you have to have superpowers to be respected, even like this, you'll be respected a short period of time

"A low maintenance woman, finally! Will you marry me?" A very crappy throw away line.

I don't like hearing all women are the same because we're not!

@BBGshop7

3 жыл бұрын

No we are not and a man with that view has a lot to learn. It comes with maturity.

@kemi.a.2000

3 жыл бұрын

@@BBGshop7 you are so right.

@garycrossman9067

3 жыл бұрын

No woman is the same , and I keep telling my folks this all the time, every woman is strong, smart, and beautiful in their own way . It’s totally absurd to compare one to another . A man should just try to love her enough, get to know her very well and see how awesome and amazing she can be. Just wish I had one in my life right now. ❤️

When a men say “No” for everything single suggestion you have, that scared me away for forever!

@dashiajames1882

3 жыл бұрын

I truly hate, tries so hard to be chilvorous & be like: " Can I throw away for you, how was the food, you don't gotta get up I'll get you something to drink. I'm like please stop I get it. But you're going wayyyy to far.

@Talinn28

3 жыл бұрын

The no bullshit is power and they like to see you struggle. Game over for me

One guy says to me, just after we were dating like 3 months: "you'll be my key to overcome poverty"... Mmm to add more context, we were from diferent social spheres but yeah... That phrase just lights UP all the alarms to run out immediately!!!

@callmelizette

2 жыл бұрын

😅😂😂😂🤣🤣

@alleaufihreposition

2 жыл бұрын

That was just so dumb. What a dummie.

As a lady I was called perfect by two men in my life and I loved that !

What turns a woman off is when a man doesn't want to satify a woman to make her happy and makes it all about him. Major turn off.

A big red flag for me are when he complains about all his bosses over the years and his colleagues. I think, "this guy cannot get along with anyone - he will not hold down a job." So, when he complains all about his bosses and colleagues, I run.

I told him everything he does IN BED is perfect lol. He was very happy to hear that😎

It’s annoying when you start talking to a guy suddenly wants you to send a picture of everything you’re doing - like he asks what you’re doing and you say you’re taking your kid for a swim he says “ooh send me a picture “ 🙄 .....so I did....I sent him one of the pool lol 😂- we didn’t talk much after that and I wasn’t too heartbroken over it lol

@garycrossman9067

3 жыл бұрын

Lolz. @Lisa Emerson. Funny story and crazy experience.. some guys are just too quick to request pictures and very inquisitive.. 😄. You’re quite gorgeous and it’s crazy to meet a person such as yourself and walk away . Hope you’re safe out there. ?

@garycrossman9067

3 жыл бұрын

Lolz. @Lisa Emerson. Funny story and crazy experience.. some guys are just too quick to request pictures and very inquisitive.. 😄. You’re quite gorgeous and it’s crazy to meet a person such as yourself and walk away . Hope you’re safe out there. ?

@dashiajames1882

3 жыл бұрын

😂😂😂...love that story !!

@lisajackson605

3 жыл бұрын

@@dashiajames1882 oh I have to expand the rest of this story....initially the day before he asked what my plans were. I was actually going to try an infrared sauna for the first time and was quite excited about it - that would have been a great conversation starter or a way to check back in later asking how it went but nooooo.....all he said was (and I quote) “ooooh send me a pic” (and remember I didn’t know him very well and we haven’t even gone on a date!) so I sent a pic of the sauna booth lol. I guess by the time he got a pic of the pool the next day he knew he wasn’t going to get what he wanted and that I knew what he was after lol.

@ZimskiForever

3 жыл бұрын

That's just creepy

I love it when my man completes a project. Just seeing the satisfaction of a job well done makes me feel so proud of him.

When the first thing a guy says to me on a online dating site or FB is something along the lines of "hi beautiful", so you don't really want to get to know me, the person I'am, how I look is all that matters, so any attractive woman would do.

What eventually drove me to break up with my ex bf was him constantly saying that he didn't know what he wanted romance-wise. He was always telling me how much he loved and adored me, but he also would get so stressed and indecisive about what he wanted for the future. He couldn't seem to choose between letting me go or asking me to marry him. The oscillation between wanting me and not wanting me just made me feel inadequate and miserable. It made me feel I wasn't good enough for him, which I don't think he intended, but I felt it all the same. All credit to him, he was very understanding when I said that was why I wanted to end the relationship. Looking back, I think his massive uncertainty made me feel more empathy for him, but eventually lessened my attraction to him. I find a solid sense of direction and core confidence in a man really sexy, and it's also important to me to know that I'm really what my man absolutely wants, with no doubt about it in his mind.

@sandracastillo3317

Жыл бұрын

So i ended an 8 year relationship 4 months ago and my bestfriend of 13 years kissed me and asked to hook up. I have been in love with him since i met him but he has always just wanted to be friends only.and has rejected all my advanced and i moved on when i started dating my ex. This was a month ago..He is giving me mixed signals ever since. In the last month he has gone from sending me cute messages every day and making plans to no contact for more then a week. On our second date he tells me he is so confused. He says everything with me is so amazing and easy and I am his happy place but he doesn't want anything exclusive. On our third date, he holds my hand and tells me this is ment to be. He tells me he wants to leave his roomates and get his own place so he can come home to me. Our fourth date askes what would happen if things dont work out and would i be all crazy? Tells me work is hard and wants to put things off til September. He doesn't call or text for two week unless he needs something. Last time I talked to him he says, he shouldn't have "attacked" me.or been so rough. (It was amazing i tell him). I did ask him why he kissed me now after all these years and his answer he only did it because he didn't have a place to be alone with me previously so he didn't persue me. ... though we have been alone plenty of times over the last 13 years....so i am not sure about this answer. He says I am his best friend and honestly he is my best friend and knows everything about me and all my dating dramas because I put him in the friend zone once he rejected me years ago. But we have always had an amazing connection. He has never had a serious girlfriend. We can't see life without each other but i dont understand why he's pulling away and lt also makes me feel inadequate and not sure how to act and i have done things that maybe have turned him off. I definitely need someone who knows how they feel about me. Not sure if i sure reach out or not or just let it go.

As women, we like to look nice for ourselves, as well as our guy. However, when a man is constantly focusing or commenting on my appearance I feel he is not listening to me, nor interested in who I am. While, I do appreciate compliments, it's nice to know he can appreciate my mind and sense of humor as well.

A gentlemen I met online and i am terested to know asked me this question : "Amongs your exes or past relationships, did you ever thought of going back to that one person?" I replied interesting question, thank you! I quickly said Nooo! I am done with them and I fought hard for a relationship before walking away. I think 12 yrs of no change is too long enough, thanked them for the changes it brought to my life, and I am excited to embrace the many choices and new experiences waiting for me! ♥️😊 I was kind to suggest to him to reflect on his own desires, he seemed not ready to enter a new relationship if he is still thinking of moving back to a woman in the past. And I totally understand. Thanked him for the honest conversation...shall we say...NEXT, please🤣

@phoenixbird4435

3 жыл бұрын

Well done for taking no nonsense from him. So proud of you,

@MS-lv7jt

3 жыл бұрын

Exactly

When I was growing up I didn't date much at all even in high school and the reason was because the guys who wanted to date me would come up and say oh hi you're so beautiful can I date you and I was like I don't know you maybe we should get to know each other man you're hot you're you're gorgeous you're beautiful and they just kept us up like a very shallow individuals so I always said no to that man that boy that guy

"No one is perfect." Flattery should been genuine. Mentioning something specific like the cologne if he smells good, the color/style he is wearing if it looks good on him to you, his mannerisms if he was polite to the server or opened the door for you, or pulled out your chair, and if he has a great sense of humor (if you understand HIS humor), laugh! Dating should never put unnecessary pressure on anyone! You're gathering information about each other, and this is the time to be paying attention to the different traits about each other. This is really more simple than what we think, but we often times lead with our feelings over logic in heat of the moment. It comes with practice if bad habits have already been implemented though. We should be excited and we should have fun, but we should always PAY ATTENTION. ***While you are listening and observing his character, keep the space a judgement free zone and ENJOY YOUR DATE the best you can. Lastly, Genuine and specific compliments will charm absolutely ANYONE. It makes the other person feel noticed, and you feel good when someone appreciates your compliment and you see that you made them feel good too! 😃😄😃😄☺

@TheMagnay

3 жыл бұрын

those examples are great. if a girl said one of those to me, it would make me melt. i do agree, keep away from the general and be honest. we may not get many compliment but we can defiantly spot fake ones.

I travel for a living and I love my career. Often, men have been intrigued by my lifestyle. But within a couple weeks of talking, they ask me when I'm going to settle down and quit traveling. They've already heard me talk about how much I enjoy what I do. For me, this is a red flag and I cut them loose at that point. The man I'm dating now, is the 1st man to say, "Girl, go do your thing! I'll see you when you come back to me."

I think it's okay to reveal that you were in abuse and involved with a narcissist but that you have healed from that journey and now attract great men.

1. “You are perfect” Why: -he knows he’s not perfect -he could feel that she was falling in love with him 2. “My ex was a total narcissist” Why: -he would wonder why would she choose a narcissist -he would think she has low esteem 3. “You’re actually normal. That’s so refreshing” Why: -seems like a compliment but context behind this compliment can scare him away. If you’re constantly attracting not so great guys, then what does that say about you? 4. “I’m bored. What are you doing?” Why: -it only works short term 5. “The drama dump truck” Why: -baby seedling=in early stages of the relationship. you should mostly be showering it with love and sunshine, and not throwing a dump truck over the baby seedling.

@armelia2726

3 жыл бұрын

Marylee Macpherson you're welcome xx

@mayraburguette5361

3 жыл бұрын

Thank for summing

"I dont have a drinking problem." Which means they do as that's why they bring it up automatically and often out of nowhere. They have been told it so often that they want to defend it right away.

What is red flag to me is when they bash their exes... also if they move things to fast that scares me and I run other way.....example I really really like you and we have only been on one date

@chisomchine3361

3 жыл бұрын

Scares me too

A guy whom I met from a friend's home party completely turned me off by telling me" I really like you but I am not looking for things seriously."

It turns off if the men focusing only for sex and aside from that asking date but he never spend money for that date. Better to be single 🙂

I think what pushes women away is when what the guy want is mostly sex and just asking you to come over and not planning to do anything fun outside of bedroom together, when as soon as they think you have fallen for them they don't have to invest in the relationship as much as before anymore and just call you when they need you or very late at night which is inappropriate if you are in the early stages of dating and if they see you just as an option and nothing serious. Playing games ruin the relationships instead being honest with each other and talk things out will help you maintain a healthy relationship

@Meira750

2 жыл бұрын

I had a man want that, not even caring if I had "fallen" for him. He just thought liking each other was enough and that we could satisfy each other's needs. Wrong! I'm not an alley cat.

I really enjoy a man who is positive and see’s great things in the world and in life, telling me on a date all the many successes he is having in his life! I believe very strongly in the law of attraction! We don’t get what we want, we get what we are! The same is definitely true for a woman. She should strive to be positive as well!

A good reminder as to why I dislike all this to do of dating and relationships.

When a guy tells me he loves me after knowing me for just a month and a half, he scares me away.

@arturo165

2 жыл бұрын

Love bombing works wonders with the hopelessly romantic

@maryjanefominyen7070

2 жыл бұрын

Why not

@ellebee9864

2 жыл бұрын

@@arturo165 Yes, I always see it as a red flag. I usually don’t succumb to saying it back either.

@snowgoddessmissy7781

2 жыл бұрын

It's not too sudden.He communicated w u for 1 n half mth already.

@alleaufihreposition

2 жыл бұрын

Thats called love bombing, used by narcissists. I speak from experience. If he says something like that too soon it is a trick. Run for your life !

This is so funny! My story: #1 We tell eachother "you are perfect for me" because we each check the boxes for what we wanted in a partner. #2 We were both previously married to narcissists. And we revealed that on our first date. #3 We both love being weird and tell eachother "you are weird" of course with a smile and a laugh because we are goofy. #4 We met on bumble app so we had lots of percieved choice. #5 "I'm bored" said no one in our relationship. We are both nature lovers; fishing, camping, hunting, hiking, etc.. Love watching your videos. You really helped me to understand men and what I was doing wrong.

@Meira750

2 жыл бұрын

I think the difference is that you add the "for me." That somehow conveys that he has everything you need but he's not objectively perfect. It means you are ok with his flaws and they don't affect your liking him.

Honestly, watching these kinds of videos make it seem impossible to have a meaningful relationship leading to marriage. We are so different. It makes me wonder how the human race continues to populate this planet. I am beginning to believe that it’s a matter of statistics or pure coincidence that two people find each other and it happens to work out.

@maryjanefominyen7070

2 жыл бұрын

Absolutely. These type of videos make love seem so impossible. There are loads of people who have almost perfect relationships and marriages without all these rubbish dos and donts

@ellebee9864

2 жыл бұрын

Someone here understands my thoughts after this video.

@Meira750

2 жыл бұрын

There's no such thing as coincidence. It's like a jigsaw puzzle. we are not "different" we are all unique but we all have our place to fit into the larger fabric of creation. When it works, it means your puzzle piece found it's companion piece and you meshed.

a guy who comes on too strong too soon. ex, saying i love you when you've only been dating for a month.

What badly scares me away is, when man on the early stages starting talk negative about his friends, family members and trying to raise himself up, other thing, when talk bad about his ex, that's basically says to me that I can be next one about whom he will talk negative

I don't like words being put into my mouth. Telling me what I said when clearly I know what I said to him. I like your friend's ride, lol

I absolutely HATE it when a man doesn't pay or even offer to pay on the 1st date!! So he's gonna let me pay? Hell no.

@tessamarie8698

2 жыл бұрын

total turn off for sure. I think you would like Anna Bay on youtube. She has a video called why ill never pay for a man and a lot of good tips for ladies.

If men ever met a true narcissist, they would understand that it has nothing to do with an ability to judge character

@alleycatalog

3 жыл бұрын

Absolutely. This is what I was thinking. They cleverly disquise who they are and they aren't always easy to detect. Time will tell who they are but the staggering amount of men that ghost you after no sex after their quota of dates often makes this very difficult.

@phoenixbird4435

3 жыл бұрын

You know Alley you are 100% right, these men are very clever in disguise. I was with one for over 20 years. I loved him dearly and loving someone who is so close to you one cannot see the true intention. You have heard the saying love is blind.It’s hard to believe for so long I thought he genuinely loved me. Slowly I was cut off from my family friends etc,my independence gradually taken away.You see I thought he was protective over his woman, love for me but it wasn’t until I came out of the relationship,something that he did was unforgivable I realise when I look back how much control he had over me in the relationship.

@liveandletlive9333

3 жыл бұрын

@@phoenixbird4435 Good for you! Keep healing. You learned from this relationship and are now a better person

@alleycatalog

3 жыл бұрын

@@phoenixbird4435 There are many yt channels that deal with npd abuse but The Little Shaman really helped me heal. Some of these people I think are narcs themselves but not her. It was a painful path to recover, as I am sure you already know, but it's worth it. I will pray for you hon. God bless.

@ellengrace4609

3 жыл бұрын

Exactly! I usually like Matt’s videos but he really missed the mark on this one. True Narcissists are master manipulators, and their victims are just that: victims. They may end up with low self confidence but they don’t necessarily start out that way. Narcissists prey on kind, trusting, and giving souls, They use those wonderful traits against them, and destroy them in the process (or try to). Narcs are like leeches, or locusts. Their victims aren’t bad judges of character. They just never realized such evil exists in human form. But not to worry, once the victim’s eyes are open, they can spot a Narc a mile away! Peace to all of you! ❤️

"I need you" and "you are my everything"

I found the ending was very spot on: even when you say a stupid thing (I like your shirt), if it is the right relation and chemistry the guy will come after you. if it is the wrong relation it is wrong not matter what...I dont like guys who want to be in a relation and yet they are territorial about their ‘things’ their house their agenda, who want to enjoy their life and then “we will see” “no drama please, you are exaggerating”

Matt, this is absolutely spot on. What an eye opener. Thanks so much for sharing this.

Thank you, @Mathew Boggs Blessings to you & ALL the Brave Thinking Institute family

m scared when my boyfriend said he feels most loved when I give him complete obedience.... lik I need to obey and follow him for everything ...

@euliebernette4108

3 жыл бұрын

Hello I can introduce you to someone that helped me fix my broken marriage

@euliebernette4108

3 жыл бұрын

Text him on WhatsApp ✅✅✅✅

They scare me the most when they refuse to trust me especially when they think that i say things that i won't deliver just as it is the trend of so many others. They scare me if i think that they're playing me, i don't like players!

I have to say .. the only thing I can agree about the ex narc thing, is that you are bringing negativity (depending on how you talk about it) to the conversation too soon, and that the date may feel like you are trying to vent all your past issues. Here's the thing: I speak on this topic with great emotion😓 and deep, heartfelt concern. Some Narcs don't reveal their true colors right away. They charm you. They are the most flattering person, and you can enjoy that person's company for a long time and fall deeply in love with them.. but another side comes out of them when they are not getting their way. Then they try to make you feel like they are entitled to get what they want when they want. Their tactics are manipulative and controlling. Every narc has their story and how they became that way, but it roots from a sense of entitlement, and a lack of developing COMPASSION for others. Do not be deceived by compassionate acts because they are not considering you in their heart, they are putting on a good impression. THAT IS ALL. They have another agenda and they can either use that to guilt trip you, or use their past to try to justify what they are doing... then after they have damaged you or broken you to tears, they say a magic word.. I'm "sorry", "I'm so sorry (for yelling at you, hitting, say that etc...), but what you did caused me to react this way" it's always an I'm "sorry" but never taking ownership on what they did wrong, and if you try to tell them, they will just yell and talk over you. Say I'm sorry again some start crying. anything they can to manipulate you into staying with them, they try to break your spirit so you feel like you are nothing without them. If you fall in love with one you feel bad and try to help and discover things about them to show that you understand, you forgive them over and over until you realize this pattern of behavior wont change. It didn't come over night, and they don't see anything wrong with themselves. Not everyone knows what a narcissist is, and to all the men who would wonder why she would "choose" to be with someone like that.. please understand that she didn't choose to be with a narc, but when she realized that he is who he is she made a courageous decision to leave. She's sharing her battle story, in another since she's saying I have been wounded, but I aM healing/healed, this is my battle scar. ***Men, if you are dating a woman who ends up revealing that her ex was a narc.. depending on how she handled the situation, you may have to be a little be more patient, but wise. You need to at least know that she is trying to heal and not trying to bring you down because she is hurting, you both can get through it and have a very rewarding relationship as you grow together- that is, further down the line if you see that you share similar likes, beliefs, and values. Being in this particular situation for the first time makes you a victim, but when you manage to get out and put yourself out there again it shows immense strength, and anyone should silently (and/or openly) admire that she sees enough worth in herself and has enough faith in humanity to try again. ❤ From one survivor to another. I salute you for having the courage to love again. ❤ you are more than a conqueror, you are beautiful, you are loved. You can do all things through Christ that strengthens you. Amen.

@dariaaria2576

Жыл бұрын

❤❤. Amen.

I especially loved Matt's abundance of choice speech! Very wise way of thinking 😌

I have to come back to this video because it's always a good reminder. I think that when it's not a clear dating situation, it's def fine to talk about exes, but at the same time, I think it's always good to be wary of the man's judge of character in other women. Insecurity shows through, and ultimately, I'm looking for growth.

Thanks for confirming number 5. I think emotional energy awareness is key as opposed to weighting him down with dramas

@margaretcampbell2681

2 жыл бұрын

And positivity is important

Thank you, Matt, for changing my life for the better ❤ you made a huge positive impact. So grateful for these videos.

It scares me when a man asks for sex on first date or asks for money

I think honesty is the best policy truly. If a man is trying to get to know you I don’t see an issue with telling him that you were in a bad relationship with a Narcissist. It doesn’t mean you had a terrible judge of character it may mean that you just didn’t know your self worth at the time like you do now so you got out of the relationship. The approach Mat that you say is wonderful as far as not bashing your ex but at the same time I feel like if the man is interested that much into you he will desire to know more about what made that man hurt you, scare you, make you unsafe so he doesn’t make the same errors. Only a mature man will know how to handle a woman that has been in that type of past relationship and see her fully for what she’s worth now. A woman with character is important to a man I’m certain and by her sharing this with him shouldn’t push him away but rather him say to himself, okay this woman knows what she wants and if I’m anything like her past relationship she’ll give me the boot. Just my thoughts.

Thank you so very much for sharing your experience and wisdom with us.

What also is a turn off when they compare you to there toxic ex and your nothing like them but better.

What scares me off is when my last date told me that he doesn't want me to fall for him.

Couldn't be agree more lol. Here's the summary. Hope it helps. 🌼 1. You are perfect 3:01 2. My ex is a total narcissist 4:59 3. You're actually normal. That's so refreshing. 6:11 4. I'm bored. What you're doing? 9:00 5. The drama dump truck 10:31

@narotsonana

3 жыл бұрын

Let's just go with the flow.... ☹️

It’s a turn off when the guy does not stop talking and rambles on to the point where one cannot speak. Another turn off is when the person constantly complains and nags about everything and they make that the main focus of the conversation. Do you know what I mean?

A man that says I love you too early will have me running away

@dashiajames1882

3 жыл бұрын

I hate when men say: - " I want you so bad "....on the 2 date - " Let me help you with that " constantly. It's soooo irritating to me. Especially when they wanna go in your house. It's a huge red flag he's trying to initiate sex. - " I wanna be with you forever"...I'm thinking is he nuts, we just met 4 dayz ago..!!

Things that have kind of put me off: telling me on a first date how much he’s a part of his ex’s family, and how he looks after his ex’s new kids. I know he was trying to come from a place of ‘I have no drama and baggage’, but it’s hard to see there is space for a potential new relationship without judgement from his ex and her family. He also told me he was on meds for depression and recovering from codependency issues which is amazing- I mean - good on him, but no necessary something to be shared up front. You kind of expect people on first dates to be bringing their best, so if they’re lowballing themselves from the start, that’s hard. I’m not perfect by a as my means and I found it helpful to listen to some of your tips, I’ll reflect on how I’m showing up in new relationships for sure!