The FORGOTTEN Borderlands Book Series | Much Worse Than You Think
Ойындар
Have you heard of these books?
0:00 Intro
4:11 The Fallen
23:23 Unconquered
36:52 Gunsight
52:34 Outro
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They could do what "Last Airbender" did with the play. Tina walks into the room and sees Brick and Mordecai reading these books. Mordecai says that it was foolish for the gang to sell their biographies. Brick says that Mordecai shouldn't have been drunk when talking to the authors (explaining the inconsistencies).
@ViApp0
Жыл бұрын
Yeah but the BL writers are not allowed to reference people other than their idol Burch.
@makeitthrough_
Жыл бұрын
@@ViApp0Do you mean Anthony Burch, the guy who wrote the only good Borderlands story?
@ViApp0
Жыл бұрын
@@makeitthrough_ Also rewrote the setting and assassinated several characters between 2 and TPS, most notably Lilith and Athena.
Lets be honest that bit about Roland tricking a bandit into turning off his shield is pretty on brand and sounds like a cut gag.
@davidortega6054
8 ай бұрын
yeah, if the story was good, following a serious event with a joke like this would be funny asf
This channel provides better borderlands content than gearbox does
@justinkonieczkowski293
Жыл бұрын
Seriously
@montgomeryfitzpatrick473
Жыл бұрын
Not difficult these days
@fierysuped837
Жыл бұрын
@@montgomeryfitzpatrick473Fr
@ThatDangBee
Жыл бұрын
Not a high bar. I can't even bring myself to play anymore of BL3. You know when you replay a game and you get to that one part that's like "ughhh, gotta slog through this section to get to the better stuff" ? Bl3 is that feeling as an entire game for me, could *barely* finish it once.
@Glenn_Quagmire
11 ай бұрын
@@ThatDangBeeif you think bl3 story is bad then you should see new tales from the borderlands
“Ladies of Reddit, what’s the sexiest thing an overweight gamer said that made you cream instantly” - John Shirley, probably.
@RKNGL
Жыл бұрын
Wouldn't surprise me if Mr. Shirley wasn't a reddit mod with how that book was written.
@neonrelmsproductions4224
Жыл бұрын
🤮
@UniDeathRaven
Жыл бұрын
wtf lmao
Honestly the books suffer from "Early franchise syndrome" where the creators had ZERO idea where they wanted the series to go so threw shit at the wall to see what stick, the books are awful and really just scream "EHHHHH we'll figure it out later just push it out and see if it works". Also more then likely the author was given the bare minimum info on the series sooo they decided to wing it not knowing how big the franchise would get, kinda weird that was happening in 2011 tho it is possible that these books were written in 2010 and just released much later to co-inside with bl2's release. What a weird world we live in huh?
@umairashraf5167
Жыл бұрын
Yeah I definitely see that happening, I mean in a way,bl2 is like a soft reboot of the series
@vadandrumist1670
Жыл бұрын
I mean, there's also the weird pervert aspect, not sure if early franchise covers that.
@e7193
Жыл бұрын
“co-inside” ☠️☠️
Bruh, torturing yourself AFTER the New Tales is beyond painful, but thank you for unearthing this atrocity so we don't have to.
@neonrelmsproductions4224
Жыл бұрын
The new tales game is so much better than this. At least the crimes of that game are just being cringe and boring, this is actually the worst.
The books could atleast do ‘Borderlandsy’ things in book format. For example, a part where each character describes a plan over 3 pages each, and Brick literally leaves his 3 pages blank.
So I guess it was a blessing Lilith didn't get her own book
@AdachiVsLife
4 ай бұрын
She got a worse treatment. She got Borderlands 3'd.
John Shirley strikes me as the type to describe himself as a "sigma male" unironically. I say this mostly because this doesn't feel like he misunderstood what Borderlands 1's world and atmosphere was like, but more so that he saw the blank slate of a world that the 1st game set up and saw an opportunity to shove barely disguised fetishes in it.
The Fallen is probably what happens when you want to make an NTR manga but you can't draw anime for the life of you
I haven't read them, but how bad could they be? EDIT: Just got to the part with Vance. This book is horrendous.
@GreenDinoRanger
Жыл бұрын
I'm at that part now. Holy hell I don't even know what to say.
@houraisheperd9721
Жыл бұрын
What the fuuuuuuuuuuuck. I expected many things from this, but not Vance. That somehow feels worse than the rapey bandits.
@alfalldoot6715
Жыл бұрын
A story in one edit
Its sad because John Shirley usually writes brilliant stuff and it's safe to say I'm a fan of him but my god, even I remember the fallen being a let down when I first read it back in the day
@MercilessBreed
Жыл бұрын
Never heard of the guy but holy shit this was terrible
@gabrielzeros
9 ай бұрын
Wasn’t his Resident Evil books loved by that respective community?
@GirlDickGang
4 ай бұрын
I've read his Bioshock book Rapture before, it's really good imo, but these oh lord
The guy who wrote these books also wrote a bioshock book in which sander cohen forces a teen to have sex with an octopus
@th3lonef0x4
Жыл бұрын
It was such a wtf moment in that book. The rest was pretty good but then out of nowhere comes this mention of what Cohen made this teen do. Not sure what the author was thinking with that part.
@legoguy228
Жыл бұрын
And it’s detailed to a suspicious degree
@michaelknox3715
Жыл бұрын
To be fair Rapture was a terrible place even before the civil war. Remember Andrew Ryan believes in unregulated capitalism.
@MelStaub
Жыл бұрын
Totally in character for Cohen, the guy was unhinged well before the civil war and we see glimpses of what he considers art in the games, not to mention the guy did questionable things with little sisters under the table
@umairashraf5167
Жыл бұрын
@@MelStaubwho was Cohen again? I forgot, it's been a long time since I played the first bioshock
Holy shit, this author cannot write women. Thank God Lilith wasn’t in any of these.
@GoddessOfMisfortune
Жыл бұрын
don't worry, gearbox can't write her either!
@austincantswim3383
11 ай бұрын
@@GoddessOfMisfortune At least Gearbox isn't dehumanizing/sexist about it, it's just normal incompetence
@NEEDLESALAD
8 ай бұрын
@@GoddessOfMisfortuneI rather have incompetent writing instead of uncomfortably sexual/on the nose sexist writing tbh
The absolute worst thing about these books is that the paperbacks are different sizes! They look so naff on the book shelf next to each other, I like my books to be uniform height in a series 😂
@Kubinda12345
Жыл бұрын
For real? My inner OCD would rage at this :-D
@davidburnett5049
Жыл бұрын
If I had books as this video describes, id recycle them
@FleshWizard69420
Жыл бұрын
I wouldn't even put them on a bookshelf. In a fire is better
I’d love a reference to these being fanfic by a Super Fan of the crimson raiders and there’s a side mission where you either help her right a new one or help Brick and Mordy get her to stop writing them.
I wound up mentally blocking the Marla and Vance sections after reading The Fallen. Forgot all about it until watching this video
somehow i feel like the your shields malfunctioning is in character, nothing else though
Idk about the Borderlands books, but the author, John Shirley, also wrote Halo: Broken Circle which is an absolutely fantastic book.
@umairashraf5167
Жыл бұрын
That makes sense actually, cuz the stuff in these books really align with halo more more than borderlands
@frankreyes6784
Жыл бұрын
And he wrote 'Rapture' based on Bioshock, and that book alone was phenomenal. Great book even if you didn't know the source.
@Dap1ssmonk
11 ай бұрын
@@frankreyes6784it does have a weirdly disceptive part where cohen makes a teenager fuck an octopus. When I was reading and hit that I kinda just blanked.
"Moxxi's character is wack." I find this sin to be unforgiveable.
@Filmandmusicdegenerate
3 ай бұрын
I think Moxxi looks innocent asf after listening to this
When i heard "Scooter is nobody buddy" i was like "oooooh boy. It is THAT kind of book..."
I got two chapters into the first one and felt noticeably upset.
Goddamn you finally made the long spoken of video about the BL books??? LETS GOO🎉🎉🎉🎉 🐐
It's great to see you reviewing again eruption
Honestly they could just put the books in themselves as a cameo. Like, someone in the world wrote stories about the famous vault hunters.
@FunvoltGunvolt
Жыл бұрын
And one of the Vault Hunters mention how poorly written they are
Been waiting for this one
17:51 this sound like p*rn parody
Okay you've won! To ever made these videos, ever since I've been old enough to be allowed to watch KZread I've always heard people say, "get ready for this!" Or, "you won't believe this!" But you sir are the very first that said it and I was shocked at the answer... so you won! I would no longer doubt when a KZreadr says that until I hear what they have to say. I mean seriously your reveal in the second story surprised me.
Huh…Granted, it is obvious that characters in the Borderlands games DO INDEED HAVE SEX WITH EACH OTHER. But I always considered that type of behavior (even of the deviant type) was always kept behind closed doors after playing both Borderlands 1 and 2. And no matter how crazy the bandits, rats or other humanoids on Pandora got, sex was always consensual. The only thing that wasn’t consensual was violent killing, either with guns or other forms of brutality.
@anantrawat2311
Жыл бұрын
Yeah thats fair, most of the psychos do have some standards, as well as the bandits. They're not just the fodder for our guns, lore wise...
I thought "how bad could it be" and then got to the "bizarre right-wing pseudo-evo-psych cuck porn" bit. Damn jinxes go hard. Edit: At least we can call them Bonerlands, right? Right?
I had completely forgotten I read these and it's so weird to be reminded of these stories. Great video!
I mean, you can't expect porn to have a good plot
@Zerker6064
Жыл бұрын
Damnit I want my thick lesbian milfs to have a interesting and engaging plot is that to much for a degenerate like me to ask for.🥺
@FelisImpurrator
Жыл бұрын
I absolutely can. There's plenty of good writing in porn. Just not here.
@umairashraf5167
Жыл бұрын
@@FelisImpurratoran you give me an example please 😅 for research
@FelisImpurrator
Жыл бұрын
@@umairashraf5167 Aurelia, Divine Dawn, Eternum. Have fun.
@badbreakingbadvideos
Жыл бұрын
@@umairashraf5167succubus in wonderland, lust friend, lust grimm, lust grimm again, succubus puttel and have fun!
I was pretty big into Borderlands in the years these were released and have literally never heard of these until just now.
@alfalldoot6715
Жыл бұрын
Tis a blessing
I was surprise to learn these books where a things when I found out about them a few years back. Now, I just gotta add them to my reading collection.
I didn't know what to expect with this video, could never had guess what I was about to hear haha
I know most people put stuff like this on a second monitor but theres somthing amusing about seeing a max level character struggle to kill a normal mode boss
Okay so this is a really ambitious thought but when they make borderlands 4 and continue the “gather all the vault Hunters” thing from TPS I hope they have all of the playable vault hunters and my idea for Krieg is that he has gotten his sane self back(a little bit at least) and his action skill would be something like the bloodlust consumes him and he loses control and I don’t know haven’t planned that long
So, I'm a bit unique in the Borderlands fandom: I've only played every game BESIDES 1, 2, or 3. But even in the ones I've played, I don't remember sex being a big thing in ANY of them. A few innuendos, and a girlfriend trouble or two, but nothing explicit. Extremely strange that it's such a big part in these books.
I would like a vide on cyberpunk's lore, it has a very in-depth story, even just 2077 alone can make a 40 minute video, what more if you include edgerunners, Cyberpunk Red, 2020, and the othee sidestories.
Borderlands 1-TPS: Fun sci-fi looter shooter with serious moments Borderlands novels: Loverslab Skyrim mods And we don't talk about 3 or New Tales because they don't exist goddamnit
@Glenn_Quagmire
11 ай бұрын
3 is a good premise for a story but terrible execution and new tales is neither
What a terrible way to spend an hour. Thank you for your sacrifice.
There were books? Well, doesnt seem to be major loss not having heard of them...
unsure if im misremembering this with another series, was at a local library and i saw some borderlands books that at least resemble these in my memory, didnt read them but from a short skim through i could tell it was bad lol.
This is something you'd find on wattpad written by some angsty teen
Been waiting a long time for this one!
"Dedicated to the fans of Borderlands" "Hey man, i don't know what we did to you but we're sorry" That made me laugh 🤣
I remember the books and friggin borderlands 3 has a very suspicious similar plot to one of the books. Of course isntead of a siren controlling the bandits some chick turned bandits into simps. Mordecai not knowing what to call black people gave me a hardy chuckle
Borderlands Book Series: The "Harry Potter and the Cursed Child" of Borderlands
I am so glad I clicked on this video. I've had the books for ages to read but never got to it. Now I know to get rid of them ASAP and not waste my time lol
If it wasn’t for the gameplay in the background, I legitimately wouldn’t have known this was meant to be a fucking Borderlands story
no way this isn't some weird fanfic omfg
A funny in universe explanation for these books could be that someone tried to publish a Marcus story they heard second hand.
From what smut site did you find these books?
Are you going to review the latest RWBY volume? Would love to see your take on it!
there is a Blue unique with red text that says "give it a burl"
"Who knows Ian? Maybe this will be my next movie?"
i wonder if you've done a video on the old borderlands 1 mobile game i think called borderlands legends, its was pretty good when i played it
i wonder on if you will do a video about your hopes of borderlands 4?
To be fair! A Claptrap saying "No I cant disarm the bomb" only to then a chapter later realise "Oh wait! I CAN disarm the bomb! Hahaha sorry silly me" is WARY incarakter fore a Claptrap unit.
Honestly I liked unconquered. Used to read it all the time as a kid.
do you consider making new "the story of" for hyperion and other corporations?
"the only villain worth being visualized" i mean...
Sounds like some teenager's fanfic. Pairs nicely with the millennial fanfic of the last couple games.
@michaelknox3715
Жыл бұрын
The last couple of games aren't fanfics
@RockR277
Жыл бұрын
@@michaelknox3715 Tales 2 definitely is. I would even say 3 is.
@michaelknox3715
Жыл бұрын
@@RockR277 also what is "millennial" about them. That term seems missused.
@RockR277
Жыл бұрын
@@michaelknox3715 Hm...it's hard to pin down but its kind of a feeling that is evoked. I think a big part is a certain type of forced jokes that really don't land at all. Edit: I'd also add that they really betray the personalities of a lot of old characters, and do a terrible job making new characters feel like they belong, or be likeable in general.
@FleshWizard69420
Жыл бұрын
@@michaelknox3715it's "California Millennial" to be more accurate. Obnoxious story, annoying characters, random political injection, extremely verbose but only to make jokes that just don't land enough. The kind of thing you would expect from an upper middle class Twitter addicted butthole who thinks they're a genius but is actually insufferable. You find those types in California especially
These books are like inqusitor Draco of borderlands
I have the first two books, got em long ago, I've yet to reread them or watch this and I imagine i wont wanna after this.
IM SORRY, THERE WAS A BOOK SERIES?!?!
@mr.psycho_the_nerd5790
Жыл бұрын
Same
@JuggyNeedsAHuggy
Жыл бұрын
@@mr.psycho_the_nerd5790 oh well hi 👋
cant wait to watch!!
So many bad stories, and isn't there something about a live action? You know what they could do? Just real simple: Make a Borderlands 2 episodic series of the game, using the in-game models, maps, and dialogue. He'll, a voice generator could even give some original dialogue for the vault hunters. Either do something short and sweet by following the main quests, or go the distance and throw in as many side quests (possibly splitting up the vault hunters into teams or solo in the process for character focus) as they can.
What type of weapon is this "sex" thing? I've never heard of it
@RockR277
Жыл бұрын
It's a mind control teqnique that works very a certain type of person. Efficacy may also be affected by the user's physical appearance.
@Kubinda12345
Жыл бұрын
It's a weapon Moxxi specializes in.
@badbreakingbadvideos
Жыл бұрын
Its an effective weapon against your mom but only when i use it because your dad cant use the weapon proficiently.
Good luck with monitization bucko
Lets commence the book burning.
I probably saw these in some store in the corner of my eye to busy looking at the manga section and halo books
Can someone please tell me the name of the background music that’s starts playing at 4:12
@ToxicognathHugs
Жыл бұрын
It's the stable theme from Breath of the Wild
Ok so hear me out right? At this point the Crimson Raiders are definitely famous, they've interacted with like every major corporation, they were involved in like every vault and multiple planet wide events. So there should be a longer side quest that deals with a like, superfan who's written fan fiction that is the books. Do it like Lynchwood and just make a fully optional town dedicated to non-canon materials in the Borderlands series. Just a bunch of incredibly weird fans of the Crimson Raiders.
Also I’m not saying this to make it even more messed up but if you take out the borderlands characters and title along with a few plot points too and you replace them with Duke Nukem then I think these books would make a little bit more sense and might make it better
I've heard about this books, but I've never read them
Well, I just spent 50 minutes listening to more reasons why Borderlands sucks balls...under Gearbox, at least.
I didn't know the series had books
Tell me you can't write women without telling me you can't write women.
"how bad can it possibly be?" *dies of cringe*
27:56 oh my god did New Tales make these glam gems canon? Do glam gems have ancient, all-powerful gods trapped in them? dont answer, because i dont care
@anantrawat2311
Жыл бұрын
Then why did u ask in the first place if u don't care
@salmon_wine
Жыл бұрын
@@anantrawat2311 because funny
@anantrawat2311
Жыл бұрын
@@salmon_wine where
@sharpscharnier1905
Жыл бұрын
new tales isn't canon copium
Prison reading !
Yay
Those books are certainly something. They are not as dumb as the New Tales but it's a near thing. Anyway these are my opinions on the books based on your review. Fallen: Probably the best book out of them. The tone is certainly different from the Borderlands we know. It's definitely more standard post-apo world which would be much more primal and gentle treatment of women wouldn't be something people would put priority in. The parts with Marla would be more interesting if there was some background (e.g. her boredom/dissatisfation with her married life) and if it was written better. The Rats deciding what to do with Marla reminds me of a movie series The Hills Have Eyes. The part with the kid is nice and Roland plays a nice role. The part with the father is dumb and the other guy reminds me of Crazy Earl. The living ship is an interesting idea but unfinished and kind of random. Unconquered: The villain's power is hillarious but her backstory is kind of random. Her being a power hungry woman who became dominatrix because she was obsessed with power and control which however wasn't enough so she uses the drug would've made much more sense. Gunsight: Some ideas weren't bad but others were horrible. Especially butchering Moxxi. And that ending makes no sense.
It is amazing a book series that exists is around as bad as New Tales and that was the quickest game I quit in years. I really do hope that a possible Borderlands 4 is somewhere between 2 and 3 for quality and possibly ignore that New Tales even exists.
can you do a diablo lore recap
I'm glad the first book was first and was also the worst because JFC.
@stellardreamrocket
Жыл бұрын
I'm on book 2 what the hell is this series 😭
@stellardreamrocket
Жыл бұрын
This is another one of those situations where I have to give you major props and kudos for subjecting yourself to extra Borderlands content so the rest of us don't have to.
Vance is absolutely an author insert mary sue, there’s no other explanation.
@umairashraf5167
Жыл бұрын
I don't think ,it's for the author, I think more for the reader,like a semi porno
Oh they exist. I own The Fallen
So the first book is just corn?
Never clicked so fast in my life
I wonder if the author didn't get the freedom he should have. (I ask this before listening to the entire video. Also because John Shirley wrote Rapture: The Prequel to Bioshock and did an absolute good job with it.)
@randomcanadian6298
Жыл бұрын
Based on the shit he did write and the fact that BL2's story is good I think this might be what happens when the guy is given too much freedom.
So... Zack dies, and the only reason they were heading to Zanthis was so he could get a job there. Way to go guys, you totally won this.
The writer needs to stop writing women
@michaelknox3715
Жыл бұрын
It's like the female characters in these books were written by a redditor with closet misogynistic tendencies
I started reading the books and haven't gotten far but I think I'm going to pass now
I’ve never thought books like this was ever written and I’m soo glad they’re not canon only thing I like are the comics which aren’t actually written by a weird sex pest who’s idea of women on pandora is to be raped is crazy to me that this was even allowed to be published in the first place😵💫
WTF?! I just listened to?
This can't be real
32:36 ok thats kinda fucking funny and feels like a joke that would be in the BL games.
Been reading the RWBY novels and other EU stuff, been pretty good so far