My dad, cis het, was diagnosed with stage four breast cancer. He had both breasts removed. He died from it shortly after. He was refused help from any support groups as they were all for women only. Imagine gatekeeping emotional support

@VannahSavage

22 күн бұрын

I’m so sorry you and your family went through that. 😞

She's SO CLOSE to getting it when she talks about the fear and heartbreak of the prospect of having to live in a body she feels is missing something - IMAGINE feeling like your body is wrong, what a horror. Can't think of any way this could be applied to the people she's vilifying...

CIS men can get breast cancer too, it's just a smaller chance because they grow less breast tissue. Her using such a difficult diagnosis to fuel an agenda sickens me

@TraceyTra-kv1xe

22 күн бұрын

Yeah, this pissed me off. We are mammals, which means all humans have brest tissue. I blew a blood vessel when she called it her sex specific disorder.

@Tenajeh

21 күн бұрын

And men have it double hard after that diagnosis because they often don't get any social support. So many live in an environment where breast-related stuff is seen as unmanly and shameful. They even get kicked out of breast cancer support groups because the victims in there see them as invaders solely based on sex or perceived sex.

Have politicians really convinced people to care more about removing the rights of others than to take care of themselves?

@TurbopropPuppy

22 күн бұрын

yes, absolutely, next question

@AngelWings1960

22 күн бұрын

⁠​⁠@@TurbopropPuppyso… are you just okay with that or… should we talk about it some more… ?

@lihns

22 күн бұрын

@@AngelWings1960 I feel like “what do we do about it?” is the next question in question (no pun intended)

My mom's a cancer survivor. She loves her breasts and would do anything to save them. Still totally supported me getting top surgery.

Reminds me of the guy whose brain damage made him more conservative.

@joycelinlgbtq

22 күн бұрын

You mean John Fetterman?

@cluelessmango768

22 күн бұрын

@@joycelinlgbtqI see you weren’t sure because it happens so often to so many

@jayfalcon-rw3qc

22 күн бұрын

Most MMA guys I know

@ryanmackenzie6109

21 күн бұрын

Huh. Usually it's the conservatism that causes the brain damage

@nicholasrodinos4701

21 күн бұрын

Jordan Peterson?

A classmate used a similar argument against abortion, she was infertile so because she couldn't have children but wanted them, she could not even imagine that others did not want children and had abortions or get hysterectomies and tought they were evil

@minngael

20 күн бұрын

She didn't get that there's so many ways a pregnancy can go wrong?

What particularly annoys me is that her mantra is all about loving yourself and your body, but her ideology is centred around the idea of preventing people from accessing self love and wholeness with one's body because they want to embody in a way she doesn't approve of.

I used the phrase "born in the wrong body" all the time as a kid/teen back in the 80s and 90s when I didn't have any other language to explain it.

There’s a kind of messed up pathos to devoting your last days on earth to this shit.

@britzkrieg2

22 күн бұрын

She's not terminal, is she?

@naoarte808

22 күн бұрын

@@britzkrieg2 not yet, but her biological essentialism will probably take care of that one.

Too bad she can't have her bigotry removed. Maybe she would have the empathy, for others, that she seems to so desperately crave, for herself.

The way she doesn’t think trans people don’t already have a perspective on this. Trans femmes see trans mascs removing aspects of their bodies that they would want and trans mascs see trans femmes removing aspects of their bodies that they would want. But the two groups don’t begrudge each other for it because we, perhaps more than anyone, understand that what we want for our bodies isn’t what others want for theirs. That this writer thinks she could add a perspective we haven’t considered is laughable.

I’ll try to merely pretend to care about Amy Souza’s situation just like she merely pretended to care about children’s safety.

Puberty wrecked my body. It made me feel like I was a robot, controlling my limbs and that's it. It took me out of the little bit of embodiment I had. (Granted, I was still heavily dissociative before puberty) My body started becoming mutilated when I was 10. I'm just the repair guy.

My sister and her husband are both Christian fundamentalists and all that goes with it. About a year ago she said something she thought was reasonable. Paraphrased, "I accept that you _feel_ medical transition was the right option for you. But you have to admit that that level of change in your body isn't _natural or normal."_ I responded that that was an interesting take given I'd done nothing that she and Brian, her husband, hadn't done. She'd had a pretty major breast reduction about a year before and her husband has been on testosterone replacement for years. Her response was utter silence and she's never brought up that argument again. I hate that gender dysphoria is designated as trans only. When in reality almost everyone has experienced it at some point in their lives. Some take action, some don't. But however "natural" or "normal" it may be applies to all.

Now I’m curious how she would feel about cis men with gynocomastia. Is it okay for them to get top surgery cause she doesn’t see them as women? Or do they just have to experience gender dysphoria because their breasts are “precious” too?

I do identify strongly with the phrase "born in the wrong body," and I still use it, but I realize it's not universal.

@CorwinFound

22 күн бұрын

Another that I feel fits me is that my body pre-transition was the prototype. I tested it for 40 years, found the glitches and issues, and came out with version 2.0. Both are my body, it was always an aspect of me, but it needed some fine-tuning.

Notice that she does _not_ feel like her tumours are an integral part of her body and they disgust her to the point of wanting chemo and going through whatever treatments it takes to get rid of them. Now have a shred of empathy and apply that to trans mascs

@rickmel09

21 күн бұрын

those people are incapable of empathy

this video helped me bc in my constant attempts to untrans myself i forgot women actually like their breasts and not think it’s a cruel joke from nature you’d love to get off yourself when the possibility arises

@CorwinFound

22 күн бұрын

Yep. Figuring out I was trans and accepting my gender dysphoria actually made me a lot more accepting of my breasts. Yes, still had top surgery and am very glad. But being able to say that there wasn't anything wrong with my breasts, they were just wrong _for me_ was a huge relief mentally and emotionally.

I'm a cis woman and I have never cared about my breasts. I hate bras, but I have to wear one. But if you want these annoying things, go for it.

@LilFeralGangrel

21 күн бұрын

i love my boobs and think they are very annoying. i especially hate how people use them to control the people who have them.

@minngael

20 күн бұрын

You could get breast reduction surgery. If it's hurting your back insurance might cover it with a doctor's note.

I hate Freud so much.

Ah, yes, this lady 100% "I am feel uncomfortable when we are not about me?"

I do have to say, I think gender affirming care should be for every one... My cis aunt had to have a mastectomy for her breast cancer and her insurance refused to pay for reconstructive surgery, but I was able to get a gender affirming mastectomy. Insurance should have to cover reconstructive plastic surgery after cancer treatment.

@CorwinFound

22 күн бұрын

Single payer health care is the answer! I'm in Canada, and both top surgery and reconstructive surgery are covered. It's lovely.

My aunt, a cis woman, who lost her breasts to cancer, has never ever said anything against me being trans, but I still felt so incredibly guilty choosing to have top surgery when my aunt didn't have that choice to keep hers.

@CorwinFound

22 күн бұрын

If we could donate we would. But your body is your body. Let's say someone is extremely fertile but doesn't want kids, and so uses birth control etc in order to not get pregnant. Should that person feel guilty for not using their fertility while there are people who want to have children but can't? No. Or a person trying to lose a few pounds while there are people dying of malnutrition on the globe. Should those people feel guilty for losing weight while there are people starving? Of course not. We are each our own selves and own bodies. This isn't a zero sum game where every top surgery results in a cis woman losing her breasts. There is no correlation. I'm not trying to attack you. Just show that this lady's post and that attitude is not based on reality.

@rickmel09

21 күн бұрын

would you feel guilty about getting a promotion because someone else was recently fired?

@KaitLynnHt

21 күн бұрын

@@rickmel09 honestly, probably. I have trauma and I'm in therapy. Currently, my mom got screwed over and ghosted by her doctors, and now she is waiting for a new patient appt and is out of refills on most of her meds. She is depressed and in pain. I felt a pang of guilt taking my meds in front of her today.

@KaitLynnHt

21 күн бұрын

@@CorwinFound no, they "shouldn't" feel guilty. But that doesn't make my brain feel less guilt. If I could logic my brain out of being dysfunctional, I wouldn't need therapy and anti anxiety meds.

16:03 should be “you own your body, it is a part of you, but you are more than your body too.”

I love when a woman with cancer decides that because she feels distressed about needing a breast removed due to cancer, that means I don't need mine removed.

I'm ancient, well gen X, and cis-ish but with trans people in my immediate circle. So I see 3 camps in my generation amd above. As a whole, we were massively uninformed about anything linked to sexuality or gender (despite being pre section 28). Cis-het was the norm/ideal, so if you could manage to live that way, it was expected that you would, or that you'd face the long list of negative consequences. Now that many of us have adult kids, access to way more information especially via the internet, the 3 groups I see us falling into is (by the way I'm AUDHD, hence the research attitude) - 1) Ohhhhh, that explains so much... I don't think I'm who I thought I was, how interesting, tell me more! 2) oh shit, I might not be "normal" I'd better attack others to cover this up and reassure myself I'm not one of them. 3) hey that's interesting, I'm still exactly who I thought I was. To be clear, I don't think all terfs are closetted but I suspect a lot of them are either scared that they might be, or have had slurs and insults used on them in the past that are based on gender and/or sexuality, so they've been angry and defensive about it most of their lives. If there's no such thing as trans, then nobody can "accuse" them of it. A lot of the online female terfs don't look stereotypically feminine, so I'm sure they've had bullying about that in school, or been briefly mistaken as boys or men. Their solution is hateful and genocidal, when what they actually need to do is speak to more trans people and maybe consider therapy, then fight the damn patriarchy that put them in that position in the first place. Gen X only ever had a minority of politically and socially active people and it's about the same percentage in my kids' generation. Sadly you are having to fight the exact same battles we did plus extra because of active and loud transphobes. I see bodily autonomy being stripped away and we hadn't even fully got it yet. Right wingers are trying to take us back to an imaginary society based on 1950s tv programs and advertising. Oh and "I am my boobs" person trying to stop other people's top surgery - who was she before puberty then?

8:25 people get top surgery or breast reduction because their breasts aren’t a beloved part of their body or they’re causing them issues health wise (mental or physical). Would this person get upset at a cis woman who wants a major reduction because her big boobs are causing her extreme back pain and a lower quality of life? Also with top surgery, there is still some breast tissue left, with a mastectomy, there isn’t. If anything top surgery would be closer to a more extreme version of a breast reduction, that may or may not include chest masculinisation.

I'm pretty sure this is how science used to work where people just kind of make stuff up and go like "yeah that sounds right"

@alisonponce8337

22 күн бұрын

Sounds like the opposite of what science is. The anti science coming from the right is crazy.

My best friend ( cis male) passed from Metastatic Breast Cancer last year. Sex specific illness? How ignorant can these people be?

If I can ever get top surgery depending the outcome of November, im gonna go without nipples so I can avoid any possible nipple graft complications and when im healed enough, get a 3D nipple tattooing. Ive had a 2 time breast cancer survivor aunt (who passed from covid) who i miss very much, but with this terf, i have very little sympathy that the point is hitting her in the face and she’s still dumb to the obvious. When i was 11, back in the 90’s, i too wished to get breast cancer just to get them removed, but my ex mother yelled at me in front of my pediatrician. And being the naïve little shit i was as a kid, i had to rolled over into my ex mother’s gender control since i didn’t know the language to express who i am till i was 30, when a former friend explained to me what non-binary is.

I'm trans and I agree about not being psyched about surgeries. But it's just necessary mostly. 👍

Its not just transmen who don’t feel great about having boobs. I’m AFAB, agender, and have a G cup. I’ve had a consultation about getting a breast reduction, but I was told I’d have to lose a LOT of weight first. I’m also in recovery from ED, so now I’m fighting the urge to restrict my eating again.

No one enjoys surgery, but my top surgery was well worth the temporary discomfort. I asked for a complete mastectomy (no nipples; they never had any sensation in them anyway, except pain from chafing on my shirt), but the surgeon kept referring to it as an extreme breast reduction, and said that the word "mastectomy" is reserved for people with breast cancer. I'm still unclear on the purpose of the distinction if it's the same procedure. Testosterone has given me decent pecs, so my chest isn't concave.

When facing a potentially life-threatening illness like this you’d think people would take stock of their priorities and focus on the things that bring hope, joy and love into their lives. To instead devote yourself to incoherently ranting about people you know nothing about and don’t have the curiosity necessary to learn anything about is just so sad. What a waste of a life.

I hate the way some of these people talk about breasts. It's just always creepy.

Lux said Mindfulness has a bad reputation but as someone who follows DBT I don't understand. Can someone clear up what it means by that?

@LuxanderReal

22 күн бұрын

People think of mindfulness as being equivalent to meditation, like it's about clearing your mind and focusing on your breath and most people can't do that, and they don't know that there are like a million different ways to do mindfulness so they end up ignoring the entire practice based on that one version they've experienced. They also haven't been taught that the exercise is in bringing your attention back to the thing, so if your mind wanders and you notice that and bring your attention back, that *is* the mindfulness exercise, so the more your mind wanders the more you get to practice the actual point of the exercise

When I had my first Mammogram they did the who vague callback. There are some concerning shadows, come back in 6 months for another scan. Then they postponed my appointment de to over scheduling. I was freaking out and crying for a day or tow, until I did some research and saw that they were likely nothing. Still worried for the whole year and a half I had to wait. It was that experience, and severe distress they would take my HRT has become the moment I look to anytime I feel impostor syndrome. Everything checked fine at the follow up thankfully.

New content from luxander the wonderful carbon based lifeform! Yay! ❤

I'm trans and I say and legitimately believe I was born in the wrong body.

Imagine using this "you are your body" stuff to rail against body mods and tattoos etc. "My skin is me, if I ink it, I taint my self." "Piercing my ear is piercing my body, my body is Me, ergo I am being stabbed." This is how goofy this is.

I love my boobs as a cis woman but I don't see why this means you can't emphasise with people who feel differently. A lot of TERFs need therapists but ones who will call them out on their bs.

I want top surgery, and I would still be really upset if I got breast cancer. I would be upset if I got any kind of cancer. I mean, it's cancer. I can't wrap my head around how she can put cancer and transition into the same basket. (I still have to watch the rest of the video. Just stopped to make a comment.) Edit: My mom had a chest port while she was undergoing chemo for non-Hodgkin's lymphoma. She survived the cancer and was in remission for 9 years when she passed away from NAFLD caused largely in part due to the chemo. Edit: Ok, I see where she's coming from. She's so close to getting it, and then she veers right over the cliff. Edit: The mere thought of having surgery, any surgery, absolutely terrifies me. I had a tubal sterilization after 2 kids because I knew I was done, but it took me 2 1/2 years of having an IUD to mentally and emotionally prepare for that surgery. I've longed to have a flat chest since puberty, and my breastfeeding years (~2 years for each kid) were the only time I felt any appreciation whatsoever for my breasts because they served an actual useful purpose for a change rather than just being in the way and attracting unwanted attention. Otherwise, I've merely been tolerating them all these years, and the older I get, the more intolerable they become, and the past 5 years, they've become so intolerable that I'm seriously considering surgery, despite my fears. This lady has no idea the amount of soul-searching people go though before making these kinds of decisions. Edit: Also, if I knew then, when I got my tubal sterilization, what I know now, I would've pushed for a full hysterectomy instead, but everyone told me it's bad to go thru menopause when you're 26, but damn, I could've saved myself years of painful, debilitating periods. Plus, the hormone changes of menopause did wonders for me emotionally. I feel so much more at peace with myself. I think it's probably because my post-menopausal hormone levels are more congruent with my actual gender (agender). In the late 90s, people couldn't even fathom nonbinary transitions, and I certainly didn't want to transition to male. However, if nonbinary transitions were on the radar back then, I think would've transitioned years ago.

30:27 yes, if you tell me tomorrow that i have a zero pain zero recovery time ability to just wake up tomorrow as a woman, I'm in. Right now, fear of anesthesia and pain are enough to keep me at a HRT only experience of my correct gender.

Why do people use their stories to generalize for everyone else's experience?

I think it's really unfortunate that while she takes the idea of a mastectomy incredibly serious, she presumes trans people treat top surgery as casual and frivolous. If she'd ever actually talked to a trans person about their surgeries, she'd know how seriously it's usually taken and how much time and money and thought goes into these decisions.

i have two thoughts. even when i was a young child, i strongly felt as if i was born wrong. the wrong body idea feels accurate. as for surgery... if i could just wake up with the correct body for me, that would be awesome. but. i guess because i am waist deep in the process of obtaining vaginoplasty, i am more concerned with the reality than the fantasy.

❤❤