I am on the Autism Spectrum, and one thing I have noticed is how neurotypicals expect us to try to view things from their perspective, but they refuse to even try to see things from our perspective. I can recall a time when I was about 9 or so, and I was super excited to go and see a play (I think it was "Charlie Brown"), that I had heard some of my friends were going to be in, and my parents (both neurotypical) decided that we would all have to leave the play early, because my brother (2 years younger than me, and also neurotypical) was not feeling well. I can remember being SO PISSED at my brother, because I had really had my heart set on staying until the end. My brother clearly was not up to staying, because he was not feeling well. If I were the parent in that situation, I would have turned to my child on the spectrum, and said, "your brother is not feeling well, so dad or I will need to take him home at (intermission, halftime, whatever it is called), but do you want to stay for the whole thing, and then you and either dad or I can take an uber home at the end?" Or if I did choose to have all of us leave the event at the same time, I would not only have my daughter (and we are imagining that she is in the spectrum) try to see the situation from my son's (whom we are imagining is neurotypical, and clearly not feeling well) perspective, but I would also try to get him to see this from his sister's perspective. I would say to my son (and we are imagining he is neurotypical and not feeling well), "Imagine how you would feel if some of your friends were going to be in a sports game, and you were super excited to go and support them, but we had to leave the game at (halftime, seventh inning stretch, etc.), because your sister wasn't feeling well. You might be a little bit mad, and maybe even mean to your sister about it."

Could you give some examples that you have found worked to increase buy in, please? I have found that some students are very content to be alone and self-reliant rather than hassle with other people

One book that I would use for younger kids on the spectrum, or with other challenges is, "Miles McHale: Tattletale." I have watched read aloud videos of this book on KZread, and I feel that it can not only help kids understand how others feel when they tell on them, but it can also help kids understand when telling on somebody might be warranted. You can point out the looks on the other characters' faces when Miles tells on them, and ask, "how do you think that other character is feeling? Why do you think he/she feels that way?" We don't want kids saying things like, "Brandon took a cupcake after you told us not to," or, "Maddie is playing video games when she is supposed to be doing her homework," but we do want kids telling us things such as, "Chloe is throwing rocks at the neighbor's dog," or, "Jake said he wants to climb on the roof."