"All transition is in opposition to cis hegemony, no matter what it looks like or what it involves." PREACH

I can't ever get enough of seeing trans people getting what we need and the resulting happiness. You look so good, and thanks for sharing this

@Sarah-re7cg

Жыл бұрын

THIS! I just made a similar comment ❤️

@eriksafin008

Жыл бұрын

Looks like a middle aged alien

@jurassicclassic6543

Жыл бұрын

​@@eriksafin008well, she is from mars

@Gabriel_Blair

9 ай бұрын

​@@jurassicclassic6543😎🤜🤛😎

That montage at the end made me tear up with joy. If you’d asked me before, I would have described myself as an unhappy old man. Then recently, I had a dream that I was walking about and saw you, Sophie. I tried talking to you, and you were rightfully wary of a strange person approaching, so you asked me who I was. Without even thinking, I answered “Cassie”, a name that is _not_ one I associate with old men. So, even though it was technically my subconscious, I’d rather give you credit for cracking my egg. Your willingness to live publicly and authentically gave this happier old woman the courage she needed to see herself. Thank you.

@bethanythatsme

Жыл бұрын

Nice to meet you, Cassie 💜

@abagoffrozenspinach

Жыл бұрын

I'm so happy for you Cassie!!! it is never too late to realise part of who you are.

@celestiapreston849

Жыл бұрын

Cassie, you're making me cry.

@arigadatred5395

Жыл бұрын

that is beautiful. my sister's name is also cassie, and she is also a transgender woman. wishing you all the best.

@lin-ni2885

Жыл бұрын

congratulations 💛💛💛💛

Every trans person should have whatever they need to be happy, surgery or not.

@michimatsch5862

Жыл бұрын

Yes, and everyone else should have their basic needs met too (yes, if trans people need surgeries or whatever else to be happy then it is a basic need).

@AlbertoGarcia-wd7sc

Жыл бұрын

@@michimatsch5862 Indeed. We can have it all. There is that false dilemma created by transphobes between "serious" medical treatment and the surgeries for trans persons, as if we cannot do everything. How ironic that done of the most vocal transphobes that use that "argument" also happen to be in favour of privatizing healthcare

@littleleakyleakythere

Жыл бұрын

all trans people should be given 1 billion dollars a day

I think facial surgery is some sort of magic because, as I have seen with others’ FFS results, you look how I always thought you looked- just more definite. It’s like the way you had carried yourself before created a glamour that built this face in our minds. The surgery made that reality so you don’t have to hold the effort of it, but your face is the face you were always meant to have.

@kaitlyn__L

Жыл бұрын

I definitely have noticed that with the other three channels I follow who've had it. I always think "wait, they look the same?" and then go back and compare and realise changes definitely had been made. It really just goes to show it truly is "make the person look more like themself" and not "chasing fashion trends" like TERFs paint it as (just because that can sometimes be the case with non-transition facial surgeries).

@cafesoftie

Жыл бұрын

Yeah, same. Sometimes ill say "wait why did you have surgery, you looked really good before!" And when i look back, it's true that they looked good, but the surgery is how i imagined they always looked and they did look better. Such a strange phenomenon.

It's always what happened to your face and never how happened to your face

This was wonderful. I also really want to thank you for that section on the feminist and queer library in Yerevan. It was genuinely quite inspiring.

7:19 - Yeah, getting anesthetized is a weird experience. It's not like going to sleep and waking up, it's like feeling weird for a minute and jumping forward in time. I had a heart catheterization done a few years ago, and I remember asking something like "so how long am I gonna be under?" and the nurse saying "oh you're done, honey."

@neongrey333

Жыл бұрын

weirdly, the thing i remember most about going under for having my gall bladder out was that it was the single most restful sleep i've had in my life, like it was absolutely wonderful got top surgery coming up in a couple months so i'm not sure if it's going to be like that again or something else lmao

@TearfulMoon

Жыл бұрын

When I was put under I think my brain might not have felt the passage of time, but my body really did. I woke up all stiff and cold. It was very disorientating.

@Moose6960

Жыл бұрын

I had surgery a couple of weeks ago and before then hadn't been under since I was a little kid, and I didn't remember what it felt like. This time, no one had me count down or anything, they just said "OK my dear, we're going to give you the sleepy drugs now!" I felt my brain buzz for a couple of seconds and then the next thing I knew I was waking up feeling pain where they'd operated, and within minutes I was fully conscious and able to text. It was a TRIP.

@saintkohle

Жыл бұрын

I had a breast reduction three weeks ago and I swear it felt like I was watching the nurses and anesthesiologist get me ready for surgery and then waking up a minute later to a nurse pulling a tube out of my nose and saying, "Alright, you're done! Oh, and your mom's waiting on you in the next room"

@anishinaabae

Жыл бұрын

i didn’t even make it to number seven in the ten second countdown. the next thing i knew, lights were too bright, sounds were too loud, and everything in my body felt too much. i remember immediately bursting into tears because of how discombobulating it was! when i told my partner about the experience, he compared it to the time he flatlined and died after getting into a terrifying car crash, and was brought back by the paddles. very weird shit!

Thank you for sharing this part of your journey with all of us. You were one of the first non-binary people I saw here that I looked at and said "That could be me, right?" and while I might not always agree with you on some things, you're always funny, insightful and honest with your essays and I'm glad you are here now.

"I look like me now." I think that's the best thing to hear. Thank you for sharing your story.

Support the channel: patreon.com/sophiefrommars FAQs: -I forgot the timecode when it said to skip aaaaaaa well it's 11:21 so if you see this comment before then you can click it if you need

@bryce4395

Жыл бұрын

Hi! Please consider pinning this comment, so that people can see where to skip!:)

as someone from armenia, im so nervous to watch this, because i don't expect people here to have treated you well at all;-;

@gamewrit0058

Жыл бұрын

She met a lot of wonderful people, too. She's honest about those who were hostile, but also talks about the wonderful people she met, great sights, queer and feminist library, and amazing food. ❤

The montage at the end made me cry 😭 I'm so happy you finally get to see yourself in the mirror!

That last bit of the videa was an extra kind of special ❤ so beautiful to see the joy of you creating you, being your own fairy godmother and princess, your own sculptor and sculpture. It's the kind of joy I see everytime I see the happiness transition brings, whether it's online or with my friends and partners, there's this almost healing beauty, it's the only way I can describe it without putting this kind of need for it to be perfect beauty, it is healing and wonderful. Watching videos like this make me so grateful for being non binary and I hope to see more videos from you about politics and social issues and video games and just all the things that make you such a wonderful person to witness.

Getting FFS surgery was one of the best decisions I ever made, I never look in the mirror and feel like I’m looking at someone else now and I’m so glad you get to feel the same way ❤

Have donated to FemLibrary and have shared both this vid and their gofundme around in hopes of getting my friends to do so too!

@annanik90

Жыл бұрын

Thank you so much, Sam! ❤❤❤ Such a great solidarity! We're so touched! This means a lot!

I haven't had FFS, but I did have my face reconstructed after an unspeakable accident with 16 surgeries over the course of 10 hours the day after Christmas and just got my confidence back, so I feel you, Sophie! Congrats gorgeous, you look great 🫂

@kaitlyn__L

Жыл бұрын

A parent of mine had a similar experience after a car crash in the pre-airbag days. Wishing you all the best with your recovery ✨

@user-sf4fy8bq1h

Жыл бұрын

@@kaitlyn__L thanks darlin!

I mean obviously you look incredible! But also just the way you sit and talk, the way you look at the camera and move as you speak, you just *are* so happy. I'm 7 months post top surgery now and I related heavily to a lot of what you said about gender-affirming surgery and the magic of HRT. I only realised just how much I had completely dissociated from my body for basically decades until after I saw my chest after surgery for the first time. Thank you for talking about your experience and making such a fascinating video, you deserve this so much and I'm so happy for you!!💖

As someone who just got top surgery less than two weeks ago, I felt this deeply. My chest looks gnarly as hell right now but every time I see it in the mirror I'm just overwhelmed by how right it feels. Congratulations Sophie. No one can ever take this joy away from you

Thank you so much for sharing this with us! It's been such a privilege to watch you work towards bringing the You that you want to see out into the light. I get such a bitter-sweet ache when I think of looking in the mirror and one day seeing the body I expect to see -- and not that little bloom of disappointment that you described. So glad your disappointment moment has faded away, and that every day leaves you happier.

@SophiefromMars

Жыл бұрын

Good question! I had difficulty breathing through my nose without concerted effort RIGHT AFTER the surgery because it was more or less swollen shut, but Anna gave me a nasal spray that really helped and in the months after as it went down I've been able to breathe better than ever in my life, but to repeat myself, my nose was entirely sideways. My deviated septum, it turns out, was really making my breathing terrible

i had sinus surgery last year and they literally put tampons all the way up my nose... The only thing i even remember from that day is when they had to pull them out & i went "oh wait i had actual tampons up there and now i can breathe again!" it is one of lifes most beautiful ewperiences

Watching the joy slowly grow in your eyes as you chronologically sort through old photos from masc masking to the fem fatale, big gay✨ energy you now radiate. As a viewer from the days of curio I am so incredibly proud of the work you have put in to make your life one you can live authentically and with pride

"Filed down" "power sanded" now i need to see some art of a wood sculptor feminizing their subject's forehead with like a belt sander

One small thing in an otherwise amazing and fascinating video - there was no timecode onscreen to jump to to avoid the squeamish stuff, not sure if that was an oversight or anything? Otherwise, great vid!

Thank you so much Sophia for such a great solidarity ❤❤❤ Sending much love to you and everybody who unexpectedly supported our library thanks to your video! This is incredible! THANK YOU wonderful people ❤

Trivia - I think the orc you meant is Gothmog, who shares a name with the chief of balrogs but is a seperate character and was played in the Jackson films by Lawrence Makore, a Māori actor who also played the Witch King and Lurtz (the Uruk-Hai who killed Boromir)

@Lurdiak

Жыл бұрын

That part where he shoves away the orc trying to help him down is so cool.

@skippycoulter

Жыл бұрын

@@Lurdiak You're gonna make me rewatch!

the footage of you pre-transition SHOCKED me, you've had such a beautiful and dramatic transformation since then

your transition montage made me feel such joy, not just for you but also for myself and the knowledge that i too will one day transition to a happier person :,)

Having started watching this channel back when your fraternal twin brother was running it, its great to have seen your movement into who you truly are! Its heartening to see ❤

Sophie you are absolutely glowing with happiness this whole episode. The point you made about being conditioned by the mirror to be dissapointed or dissociate from your reflection is a really powerful one. I didn't fully realize it until I finally looked in the mirror and saw I had a future for myself worth fighting for. Thank you for sharing your journey. P.S. Thought I'd leave this here in the chance you read this; I also wanted to thank you for your Alan Wake video, and how you deconstructed the struggles of writer's block in yourself and Wake. I wouldn't consider myself a writer by any means. But the last time I barely pulled through a writing assignment I was in the midst of a gender dysphoria and undiagnosed neurodivergent death spiral. I never felt more lost, and though I don't feel quite ready to go back yet, you and other trans people creating amazing work gives me hope I'll make it happen when the time is right.

watching your timeline at the end made me tear up a little, I'm so happy for you Sophie ❤

Sophie thanks for dropping this today . It seems like all I see on social media and trans spheres is the struggles we face and the bigotry that is in the world facing us. Some gender euphoria and seeing people be themselves was needed today for me ❤

also whoa I have to visit that library when I'm in Yerevan, thank you for the shoutout!!

how did u get even prettier 😭😭😭 so happy 4 u 🫶🫶

Trans joy is so real 💕💕💕 loved hearing how the time just slips away when you go under. I’ve got top surgery in just a few days now (transing the other way) and I am just so so excited. We all gotta do what makes us happy :3

that learned disappointment thing is SO real. i had a similar sudden OH MAN WHAT THAT'S JUST ME! change when i got top surgery- i had gotten so used to kind of glossing over my chest that once i looked at myself with the offending appendages removed i was... man. i cried lmao. surgery, transmed stuff aside, really is a life-changing thing. so glad you were able to do this! so annoyed the nhs required you to go to armenia for it!

I don't know if anyone else has had this experience but the three times I've been under general anaesthetic, I woke up crying. It takes a few breaths (and the soothing presence of a friendly nurse) to calm down and remember what is going on. There's no feeling of being upset, I just become aware of my breathing as I wake up and realise I'm crying

@argusfleibeit1165

Жыл бұрын

I have had the same experience every time. One time the nurse was yelling at me to cut it out. Then I just plain stop and am wracking my brain to remember what I was crying about. Never remember anything. NOTE: I have been treated for depression nearly all my life, so maybe it's just my defective basic wiring taking over. I seem to snap right back to my medicated state, thank goodness.

@kaitlyn__L

Жыл бұрын

Yep, my first time was like that too. I think they did something different the second time, maybe more morphine, because I just woke up dazed and confused but totally serene that time.

I could not possibly be happier for you and your journey to look like yourself. You genuinely radiate joy, and that is inspiring. 🎉

Anna at the femme library is just the cutest, coolest thing on Earth!

@annanik90

Жыл бұрын

Thank you so much ❤❤❤ sending much love!

@nicolechampeau8432

Жыл бұрын

@@annanik90 no, thank you for doing such important work in Armenia!

I don't know if I'll ever get surgery but I cried watching the pictures of your journey. I've been watching your channel since before you transitioned and I remember the video where you came out. It's one of my favorite videos ever because I started to think about my own gender identity. I'm non binary, I've been on hrt for 6 months and I really understand now to know what it means to feel more like yourself everyday. At the risk of sounding too parasocial-y, you're a huge inspiration to me and I'm grateful for that.

Cried of joy twice in this video - first when you described what it felt like to see yourself properly in the mirror post-surgery, and second in the montage. I first found your videos years ago and the first shot of the montage gave me such severe whiplash - your “Being Seen” video was the first video I watched where I then allowed myself to quietly look at a looming reality that had sat behind me for so long - that maybe, just maybe - I wasn’t a girl. There’s a lot I’d want to say, but basically, your videos - personal and analyses - have been very important to a 27 year old transmasculine person halfway across the world, and I thank you so much for sharing.

Congrats! 🎉I've been trying to save up for almost 20yrs now, you're so spot on with how hard it is. This was an amazing story tho and thank you for sharing it. I love seeing us get the help we need.

That ending made me tear up a little. Your general vibes and presentation is who I want to be, and its an indescribable feeling to see other trans people change and be happy in a way that you see yourself in. This is actually the second time you've done this, your coming out video released right around when I accepted myself and had the same effect xD This video was also the final nail in the coffin of me deciding I need to get tattoos at some point, as soon as I have a solid idea for what kinda design(s)

congrats on the surgery!! armenia is such a cool fascinating place, I've always wanted to travel there and to other regions but am personally not ok with the risks (fellow tran). thank you for showing the feminist library i will definitely send some money and books their way :)

thank you so so so much for sharing this with us! also the part about your doctor made my heart melt, Armenians are wonderful people

Hey Sophie, you are such an incredible person! Thank you for everything you do for queer people and for our little library in particular. Sending hugs from our community ❤❤❤

Thanks so much for sharing ❤ Helps a lot for my own transition as I've thought about FFS myself but found it quite overwhelming. And oh my gosh, you're looking amazing!

I've been following you for ywars and it's such a joy to see your journey! Thank you, Sophie ❤

glad to see another one of these, great as always, love ur work

Congrats on your surgery! you look so happy and that's wonderful to see! I love seeing how much you are just beaming through the whole video, really made my day xx

Beautiful. I cried. Thank you for sharing.

So happy for you !! Thank you for your work here and every where, you're one of the most inspiring people i watch on youtube and seeing you so happy and beautiful in your body is something really awesome !! Thanks again, for existing and speaking your voice

I absolutely LOVE seeing you so happy. I've been watching you since before the transition and you look so much happier now. I'm so very glad you had the option to do so and a wonderful circle of supporting people. Love to see you do stuff, would love to see you do more stuff!

I'm so happy for you! It seems like the whole process went with few complications? It's inspiring to see your journey and the joy it gives you. You lend so much strength to so many with your activism and your essays... it's wonderful to see the universe pay it back. I never had (and probably never will have) the courage to be myself. But seeing others find that joy soothes some of that pain. You go girl!

this so beautiful im gonna cry you finally look like yourself ❤️😭

The Left at London song… such a perfect choice

Slideshow was super wholesome and heart-warming. Glad recovery has been going so well. Best wishes from Florida.

Wonderful video. I loved learning about the library! You are gorgeous.

Such a beautiful video. I’m so happy for you x

The pictures at the end have sufficiently made my cheeks ache from smiling so much. Thank you for sharing this 💚

Been following you since back in the Curio days and that montage at the end of the video had me tearing up 😭 I just had my top surgery two months ago and even with the complications I had I wouldn’t change a thing-what you said about the initial disappointment you’d prep to see when looking in the mirror vs what you see now is the same for me with my surgery. 😭

I just need to get used to crying tears of joy at the end of all your videos. I'm so happy for you, Sophie! Thank you for sharing your story!

Thank you for putting this out. It's so hard to find trans joy nowadays, but it's so important. I'm having my top surgery in 2 weeks and trying to stay positive about the state of the world.

I am so effing happy for you. Thank you for sharing this.

Thanks for this Sophie. This dispelled a lot of the wrong assumptions I had about FFS and made is a lot less of a difficult decision for me.

That glow up montage at the end! 😭

I really appreciate your willingness to go in depth on the mechanics of all this. I'm glad you were able to get this done.

This is such a powerful video. I cried at the end when I saw how happy you are. All my love to you.

So happy for you. I teared up a bit. It’s been great to see your journey

My wife recently needed a full jaw surgery to correct an overbite. The broke and rebuilt her sinuses and both jaws. It was medically necessary because she would have had her airway collapse by her late 30’s without the surgery, and they said it would be best to get the surgery done in her 20’s. It was no joke. Waking up ever 2 hours for a different cocktail of drugs administered via giant syringe with a rubber tube at the end to get through the wired shut… it’s a serious surgery! She’s doing great now, and realized she can smell things much more strongly! I hope your surgery results are exactly what you wanted! (Haven’t finished the video yet)

This video struck my heart deeply and i am so happy your work exists

I’ve always loved your content. You’re so well spoken and have such an interesting insight into many different topics. Having said that, I always thought you were a beautiful person to begin with. But you truly look radiant now. And it’s not just your physical change. You have a glow about you that only comes from confidence. It’s so amazing to watch people go through journeys, thank you for letting us go along with you on yours. ❤

I didn't expect to start crying at work this morning but here I am lol. Thank you for sharing this story with us. It was fascinating, and these stories really do help show those of us just starting our journeys that there's hope and a way. I'm so happy for you!

This was such a lovely video - been really incredible to see your journey! xxx

Long-time subscriber here ugly crying at the montage. You've always been such a beautiful person and I'm so happy you get to see it now. Also as a fellow bird with a crooked beak, I've never heard anyone else talking about the head tilt before, 11/10 call-out

the final sequence is so beautiful. made me weep :)

You look absolutely gorgeous, and the most beautiful thing about the way you look post-op is seeing you smile and be happy about it. I'm so happy for you, too, Sophie ❤ Greetings from another shithole (Poland)!

@cloudthief8918

Жыл бұрын

Living in Poland I've given up on any kind of transition :')

@nikodemjelonek8420

Жыл бұрын

@@cloudthief8918 its possible here, sadly just takes a lot of persistence.

@rileyfaelan

Жыл бұрын

@@cloudthief8918: Come to Germany. Or consider Austria or Netherlands. One of the legacies of WWII is, Germany is now a safe place of refuge for people fleeing from fascists.

This was a such a sweet and wonderful video. Thank you for sharing your experience with us!

"Hello to this ear!" might be the most wholesome thing I've seen this year. I don't know you, but you sure look happy talking about this.

As someone who lives in a country where there's a lot of hostility towards queer people as well, I appreciated the focus on local queer and queer-friendly groups. I hate how much narrative there is about calling people in these places "backwards", etc., when that ignores not just the local queer people, but the support there actually is - even if it has to go underground sometimes to protect against the aggression and propaganda that's propped up systematically. People are people everywhere, and they're not bigots by nature. ❤‍🩹

Finally got a chance to watch this. Oh my gosh the feelings from my. I am just so overwhelmed and happy for you and I can't wait until it is my turn to get an FFS journey going. 💜 thank you Sophie

It was a great one. I can see that with every month you are more and more blooming - I'm really happy for you

omgosh that shot of you under those strings of lights was amazing!

Love you, Sophie. Thanks for sharing your experiences. 🌺

seeing your journey has been so wonderful, i see a lot of myself in the way you talk about how happy you are now. transitioning has been a constant state of self-discovery and waking up. I wouldn't trade it for the world!

Watching your journey at the end made me cry in joy, thanks for sharing.

Wonderful video. Having only discovered your channel recently from Thought Slime cross-overs, I truly enjoyed the end credits with the photo show of your journey. Thank you. (now to watch the recent Step Back video about Disturbing History. _sigh_

ok I've now finished the vid and this is so amazing, I'm so glad for you. thank you for making this - as weird as it feels to say this to a strtanger on the internet - this makes me feel like I can be that happy with myself one day

I am genuinely happy for you. The ending montage was exactly what I needed to see today. Thank you for never giving up on being the person you’ve always felt like you were. Aligning one’s outer with the inner is one of life’s greatest gifts. ❤ Brings me joy to see that you’ve received it.

Beautiful before and after, I’m so happy for you ❤. I know it’s cringe to say brave, but it really is brave to share your journey with us, thank you.

I work on a heart surgery ward and I have to admit, any surgery on or around the face scares the living daylights out of me. Congrats on the successful surgery and the speedy recovery, I am so glad to see you so happy!

I’ve been following your work for years, since before you started transitioning and watching you go on this journey has been so inspiring to me 💜 I’ve known for a long time that I am nonbinary, but you showed me a version of gender that matches how I always saw myself 💜💜

i love all your content but it's always a joy seeing you talk about things that make you giddy. you're an inspiration

Thanks for talking about Armenia and what it was like being there- just made a donation to the femlibrary!

congrats on your surgery, I'm so happy for you and you look so much more happier and comfortable in your body now! 🥰

Anesthesia is indeed peculiar: “Now, once this mask is over your face, count backwards from ten.” “Okay, 10…” “We’re done! Are you feeling alright?” We’re all glad you’re feeling well and getting results you‘re pleased with! Just never think too hard about anesthesia - it quickly becomes an existential mind-trap from which it’s hard to escape … like, real ship-of-Theseus/Boltzmann-brain level “Who am I?“ solipsism akin to dropping bad acid in a hall of mirrors.

@SophiefromMars

Жыл бұрын

anaesthetists are a funny lot, I've heard about them asking patients what they'd like to dream about (apparently this is a russian tradition) and asking exactly which number the patient wants them to knock them out at. I think people just can't grasp the concept very well that there are very effective chemicals that will simply knock you tf out, and I'm glad the people who are trained to do it safely get to have some fun with it

@dustind4694

Жыл бұрын

I dunno, I don't think it's that bad. Heraclitus got it right: you can't cross the same river twice, it's not the same river and you're not the same person.

@fish3977

Жыл бұрын

General anesthesia is split to many parts one of which is drug induced amnesia which is why it feels like somebody surgically (heh) cut off a slice of your life

@oasntet

Жыл бұрын

It's hard to think about, but a bunch of current neuroscience seems to be leading towards the idea that continuity of consciousness is an illusion. Some parts of consciousness might not last more than a few seconds, so in some sense a new 'you' is created several times a minute. You just pick up where the last 'you' left off with all of the memories there to convince you that you weren't just created a second ago. Kinda solves the star trek transporter issue... (That's assuming the neuroscience findings are the whole truth; it's probably far more complicated and really there's at least two 'yous' involved and quite possibly dozens more.)

@dustind4694

Жыл бұрын

@@oasntet I admit this is confirmation bias talking, but it aligns with what I believe about how the mind and body work.

I'm much better at focusing on expressions rather than features and the happiness on your face throughout this video is so heartwarming. You look absolutely wonderful and I hope you feel absolutely wonderful ❤ seeing anyone in the alphabet mafia living their best life feels so good, thank you for sharing and for sharing so much information on Armenia! ❤

Yay! The 3D model of your bones was really cool. I'm glad your are healing well. ☺

Oh godness. I am so incredibly happy for you!! Thank you for sharing you story, it means a lot to see it. Tears of joy, tbh. 💜💖

the montage at the end had me in tears. This whole process is just amazing. that we can really just do this. find ourselves. find joy.