Signs that Your Relationship Is Falling Apart

Ойын-сауық

Fr. Mike discusses four signs that your relationship is in danger of falling apart, especially when it comes to stonewalling.
Stonewalling, as used in the context of this video, is when we refuse to communicate or cooperate with someone. Psychologist Dr. John Gottman calls it one of the “four horsemen of the apocalypse”, or one of four types of expression that indicate that your relationship is falling apart. The other three are defensiveness, criticism, and contempt.
As Christians, we should always pay attention to the one who is communicating with us. After all, we would expect at least that much from them when communicating with them. Loving someone means seeing them. By seeing, here we mean literally looking them in the eyes when they talk to you, but also understanding them and seeing them as a person made in God’s image.
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Пікірлер: 421

  • @GinnyandEric
    @GinnyandEric5 жыл бұрын

    "Loving someone means seeing them." BOOM

  • @lucasthall344
    @lucasthall3445 жыл бұрын

    Father Mike I'm a Protestant but you seem like a good guy and I like your vidoes

  • @RGTomoenage11

    @RGTomoenage11

    5 жыл бұрын

    Welcome Home Lucas.

  • @Anthony-vx6cs

    @Anthony-vx6cs

    5 жыл бұрын

    You might also enjoy some of Bishop Fulton Sheen's videos!

  • @nickyflowers5953

    @nickyflowers5953

    5 жыл бұрын

    Fleur de lis, huh? May the Blessed Trinity continue to unite the Body of Christ #GoSaints

  • @ljt45dend

    @ljt45dend

    5 жыл бұрын

    We are all brothers and sisters, welcome friend!

  • @divyajoyce4880

    @divyajoyce4880

    5 жыл бұрын

    Welcome dear

  • @RandomnessWithClareTherese
    @RandomnessWithClareTherese3 жыл бұрын

    This is been the bulk of my marriage. No eye contact, begging his attention, let alone, basic acknowlegment and that's probably the most painful aspect of our "relationship", the feeling that my simple exsistance is unimportant but also a nusisce.

  • @teresatantaro8398

    @teresatantaro8398

    3 жыл бұрын

    No words 😢😭🙏

  • @IsraelCountryCube

    @IsraelCountryCube

    9 ай бұрын

    Oh. Come on you're beautiful I'm sure you're doing some wrong action or lack there of to have him ignore you!

  • @ClareMadsonVlogs

    @ClareMadsonVlogs

    9 ай бұрын

    @@IsraelCountryCube Are you serious? Beauty is skin deep and the was I treated horribly.

  • @limeOjello

    @limeOjello

    5 ай бұрын

    @@IsraelCountryCube Wow, that’s awful and ignorant. I guess you think that women who get abused deserve it somehow?

  • @tzm777

    @tzm777

    3 ай бұрын

    I’m sorry you are going through that. 😢 I am praying for both of you. 🙏🏾❤🙏🏾❤🙏🏾

  • @imperialguard28
    @imperialguard285 жыл бұрын

    We should listen to understand, not to respond.

  • @GregAitchison
    @GregAitchison5 жыл бұрын

    I heard this advice recently that I think ties in perfectly with what Fr. Mike is saying here: "Everywhere you go, imagine that each person you see has a sign hanging around his or her neck that says, 'Make me feel loved'."

  • @IsraelCountryCube

    @IsraelCountryCube

    9 ай бұрын

    Supposed Id be allowed to comfort every male and female that is sad. Id do it.

  • @robinlee9272
    @robinlee92725 жыл бұрын

    Fr. Mike, your video just saved my relationship. I never knew what it was called (stonewalling) but I’ve had it done to me for many years & consequently I too, caught the stonewall bug, if you will. Now I plan to greet my husband with a smile & the loving eyes of Jesus. This has totally changed my perspective. Thank you & may the eyes of Jesus always be looking back at you & all souls with his infinite love @ mercy.

  • @franshoobridge5435

    @franshoobridge5435

    5 жыл бұрын

    Hi Robin, how do you feel when you don't get that in return?? Or worse yet no big or kiss unless YOU initiate it!!! It's very difficult!!! May GOD Bless you and your family!!! ❤❤❤

  • @robinlee9272

    @robinlee9272

    5 жыл бұрын

    Hi Fran, well at first it really hurt & I felt I was doing something wrong. Over the years I found myself “stonewalling” back which made everything more tense. Since Fr. Mikes explanation of this behavior I’ve become more aware of my actions as they are all I can control, overall we are now communicating more. When I greet him with a smile & desire to be present everything changes for the better. Sure it hurts when affection is not reciprocated, so I just ask God for strength. Thankfully it’s just getting better each day. May God bless you & your family

  • @mrsl5514

    @mrsl5514

    5 жыл бұрын

    @@robinlee9272 I will pray for you and your husband

  • @Mshabbak

    @Mshabbak

    4 жыл бұрын

    @@robinlee9272 Hello Mrs, how did it go for you? Did you notice difference??

  • @ich-nuta

    @ich-nuta

    3 жыл бұрын

    @@robinlee9272 Hi, congratulations... You are very strong and wise. Thanks for your posts, they are encouraging to me... I needed this. How have things gone for you guys? Hope it's better and better...

  • @ruthnoelmarie...9061
    @ruthnoelmarie...90613 жыл бұрын

    The most common greeting in the Zulu tribe is Sawubona. It literally means “I see you, you are important to me and I value you.” 🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻

  • @Bob.W.
    @Bob.W.5 жыл бұрын

    Lack of empathy. Even more subtle than intentionally stonewalling.

  • @SidekickSam24

    @SidekickSam24

    5 жыл бұрын

    I was wondering if it was just a lack of enthusiasm. Lack of empathy is worse. Now I'm wondering where the line between them is.

  • @walterbandeira6963
    @walterbandeira69635 жыл бұрын

    Great message. Stonewalling is a form of passive aggressiveness.

  • @fandoms5ever
    @fandoms5ever5 жыл бұрын

    Amen. I am so happy that I recently got out of an emotionally abusive relationship where these “horsemen” would appear. I feel very lucky that my faith in God and knowing I am worthy of greater love helped me make that decision.

  • @franh8043

    @franh8043

    5 жыл бұрын

    Yes, you deserve so much more.

  • @matthewcunningham5382
    @matthewcunningham53825 жыл бұрын

    It's even easier to stonewall today with cell phones and other technologies...

  • @saharahclark7340

    @saharahclark7340

    5 жыл бұрын

    True.

  • @goesgoodwithcoffee1029

    @goesgoodwithcoffee1029

    4 жыл бұрын

    Yes, indeed

  • @muchachitachinita
    @muchachitachinita5 жыл бұрын

    Hi good morning father watching from the Philippines 🇵🇭💕

  • @somtomadueke240

    @somtomadueke240

    5 жыл бұрын

    Iommie Abraham Garcia salamat

  • @rahmargmarkifamily1891
    @rahmargmarkifamily18915 жыл бұрын

    Hi Father Mike 👋 Watching this from Karachi, Pakistan. Thank you. Rah

  • @c.g.jonesze9089

    @c.g.jonesze9089

    5 жыл бұрын

    How is Pakistan :)?

  • @dandelionjam916
    @dandelionjam9165 жыл бұрын

    Thank you for this video. I've stonewalled a few of my friends before, but I didn't realize how much it must've hurt them until now. I am going to look at them with the love of Christ, even when it's difficult. Thank you, Fr. Mike 🙏

  • @franh8043

    @franh8043

    5 жыл бұрын

    Same here.

  • @IsraelCountryCube

    @IsraelCountryCube

    9 ай бұрын

    Stone walled? Woah you definitely caused them pain! But I agree I've done it before too I repent!

  • @caribaez5711
    @caribaez57115 жыл бұрын

    basically great communication is the most important asset to build great relationships!!

  • @peterkershaw11
    @peterkershaw115 жыл бұрын

    May I propose a synonym for the teenage/young adult world? Phone screening This isn't just someone looking at their phone while you're talking to them, this also included non-essential deep conversations over text messaging: can't read a face you don't see. Also, if I might add onto the old quote "if looks could kill, an eye wouldn't care" or in other words "the gaze of love is one of life"

  • @hayleykwan09
    @hayleykwan095 жыл бұрын

    Hi Fr, thanks for the video. The African language that you’re talking about is Zulu. Sawubona- I see you.

  • @SidekickSam24

    @SidekickSam24

    5 жыл бұрын

    And also Na'vi from Avatar heh.

  • @nickyflowers5953

    @nickyflowers5953

    5 жыл бұрын

    Sidekick Sam 🤣

  • @emilyjamela2683

    @emilyjamela2683

    3 жыл бұрын

    hahaha

  • @sanmak3283
    @sanmak32835 жыл бұрын

    “Sawubona” means “I see you” in my Zulu language 😊. Thanks, Fr Mike. I’m binge watching your clips from South Africa. I was looking for 1 topic in particular. I ended up watching a lot of clips as you articulate every subject so well. God bless you, father.

  • @brigidadsouza7496

    @brigidadsouza7496

    3 жыл бұрын

    Hi Robine u are s protestant? Not a born again... Unless one is born again we cannot see the kingdom of God. Please read John(Bible) Good people don't go to heaven only those who are born again Thank you🙏 .

  • @DarkAngel-cj6sx

    @DarkAngel-cj6sx

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@brigidadsouza7496 Jesus said unless you are born with water and spirit, you have no life in you. Get off your high horse, you are not special

  • @brigidadsouza7496

    @brigidadsouza7496

    2 жыл бұрын

    Sorry Father I was a Roman catholic some years ago,that was enfant baptism.It is said in the Bible,when any human being of any background take Jesus as their personal Savior The Holy spirit will guide us in all truth and I have taken the water baptism again few years ago. Jesus Christ said"I AM THE WAY The TRUTH AND LIFE" No one comes to Me unless The FATHER draw us near. My relationship is come close to Jesus and it is relationship and not religion.and if you say something against me(you are saying it to THE HOLY Spirit) and that Yushua and ABBA Father will not like it.

  • @brigidadsouza7496

    @brigidadsouza7496

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@DarkAngel-cj6sxwho is dark angel n why.? I am saying the Truth.In the Bible Jesus says .You will know the truth and the truth will set you free.You read the Bible and keep on reading.And also see if we are supposed to pray to Mary and the saints......thank you

  • @clareb595
    @clareb5955 жыл бұрын

    Watching from Canada 🇨🇦

  • @michaelrivera8037
    @michaelrivera80375 жыл бұрын

    Thank you for this. I am 100% guilty of this with a co-worker just yesterday. Change is starting right this second ! Keep doing my good friend. We are listening :)

  • @thatguyk.5306
    @thatguyk.53065 жыл бұрын

    New thing to give up for lent!

  • @parent-alerte2562
    @parent-alerte25625 жыл бұрын

    Being stonewalled is difficult. 😢

  • @maryj7423
    @maryj74235 жыл бұрын

    I needed this, thank you father. I remember the Old Testament says to rejoice with the ones who are happy and to cry with the ones that are sad. And to have a heart of flesh. And to comfort the grieving as an act of mercy. Because whatever we do to someone we do it to God. Our faith will always compel us to get out of our problems and find a better way to deal with them, a loving way, because of what Jesus did. There's no escape from such a great love. I love this, it helps me not to die of selfishness.

  • @mariselabecerra1675
    @mariselabecerra16755 жыл бұрын

    Wow, thank you father, you just made me realize I do this stonewalling to my husband! I must stop right away. Please don't stop making videos. Praying for you, God bless!

  • @rjskeptic5273
    @rjskeptic52735 жыл бұрын

    8.13 "I see you with the eyes of christ." I hope I see you through my own eyes and offer empathy and help where I can.

  • @SassyMa_
    @SassyMa_3 жыл бұрын

    I never new what my husband's been doing to me for so long was called stonewalling. In fact he got home from work this evening, and I was sharing with him something I had found out about, and was going on about this n that, an how it made me feel an, suddenly I realized that he wasn't listening and he could careless.... I felt so stupid and nervousness, so I kept talking not realizing I was actually aggravating him. It was humiliating, it felt like a sucker punch to the stomach...I finally realized my husband can't stand me anymore, and I thought we were getting better. Guess not! How could he make me feel this way, he never did it before? I thought you myself. I was home all day alone and just wanted to talk to someone....I some how began to feel ashamed of myself, and literally felt sick to my stomach...I finally got my answer, he finally told me without really telling me that he hated me...Such a hard pill to swallow. So I just shut down and I realized now how alone and scared of him I really was. Everything was for not! I'm so stuck and the worse part is he told me he doesn't believe in God!!I finally put my foot down I am done! I can not be with a man who doesn't believe in God, I can't. That scares me, so...But now I'm stronger and I give as much has he dose and he not really liking the new me...But I can't trust him nope... Anyways, I'm sorry this was so long but its exactly what I was looking for when I got online. And Thank you so very much for making this channel for us. And God bless you...

  • @olololo9224

    @olololo9224

    2 жыл бұрын

    I know this os late but you were pouring your heart out on this message and I wanted to know if by God’s grace your marriage improved at all? I know how hard it must be, i feel like that too. Im sorry for your pain wish I could give you a hug. Love sometimes hurts so much especially when you just want your husband to notice and be your best friend in a way. Being at home all day is pretty lonely sometimes.

  • @SassyMa_

    @SassyMa_

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@olololo9224 Wow I forgot about that comment I made. I reread it and realized I probably shared way to much. And no it has not gotten any better, infact this morning before he left for work we got into it bc he was gaslighting me, and being rude and cold to me per his usual. And I told him I wanted out and this time I mean it. Thank you and God bless you for caring it means alot....😊😇

  • @tiggyglanville8713

    @tiggyglanville8713

    2 жыл бұрын

    Apologies for adding my own 2 pennies worth so late! My father has done this my whole life (or certainly as long as I can remember). He can walk through a room and pretend that I don’t exist. Presently a word has not been uttered between us now for 8 months (not that this is abnormal, like I said he’s done this my whole life, and we live in the same house). It’s emotionally abusive behaviour and a form of control which I don’t think he realises has made his wife and his children despise him so ironically he has no control. I’ve learned recently though to love the silence because in these moments I can really be close to God and I’m coming to understand that despite his arrogance and the pedestal he has put himself on, my father needs me more than I him. If I need to be here like this, then I will for as long as God requires it of me. This is not to say that you should stay in that situation yourself but just to let you know that you are not alone. God bless you and I pray that something strikes your husband’s heart to realise the damage he is causing not just to you but to himself xx

  • @SassyMa_

    @SassyMa_

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@tiggyglanville8713 Thank you Thank you Thank you! I needed that and I never looked at my situation like that before but your right, so right! And God is here he always has been. And God bless you! Nice seeing this comment in the morning 🌅.....

  • @SassyMa_

    @SassyMa_

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@tiggyglanville8713 I'm sorry that you understand what I'm going through, and my heart goes out to you. You sound smart and amazing Keep your head up and I praying for you...Take care of yourself and God bless you for being so kind to me!

  • @tanja3400
    @tanja34005 жыл бұрын

    I have problems within my marriage and what hurts the most is him not acknowledging my pain and thinfs i say. I know i do love him and that he loves me and his behavior was excacly the same since day one. I do not feel listened, important and I am definitely not emotionally satisfied. 15 years married, 2 children and i left all my family to come to him in a different country. I just want to talk, laugh and share my feelings and thoughts with someone and i dont have that no matter how much i try to show him i need it. I stopped pushing because it causes conflicts and he shuts down more. No divorce for me i just ask God to help me understand and see things in better light.

  • @suzieschwartz2619

    @suzieschwartz2619

    5 жыл бұрын

    Tania Tania I hear you and relate to your experience very much. I feel invisible, unseen by my husband and it breaks my heart. Married for 21 years with 2 children and divorce is not an option, but honestly, has been on my mind on and off for the past few years. I love him and wish for a more loving, compassionate, intimate relationship but it’s so hard to stay positive when the person you love dearly doesn’t return the amount of affection and love given. I’ve realized now that I have stonewalled my husband at times, hoping he would feel the hurt, but it doesn’t seem to bother him and only makes me more sad and distant from him. This sacrament of marriage can be so challenging and takes so much effort, patience, forgiveness, and charity, more than I feel that I’m capable of. So I’ve been trying to pray for us, to soften our hearts and ask for those virtues that I lack. Prayers and blessings for you TaniaTania and your marriage. Where I am weak, He will strengthen me.

  • @tanja3400

    @tanja3400

    5 жыл бұрын

    @@suzieschwartz2619 Thank you! Thats all we can do hope nd pray for the best. I have looked for attention elsewhere and it was seeking emotional connection online. I felt guilty for it but then it makes me mad that he doesnt keep his wedding vows like he promised. I was in so much crises last year. I considered divorce too many times , i drifted away from god , my health started getting bad. I started reafing bible, goint to mass and slowly i got better. I was at the healing mass nd was praying for my brother to het better . After 2 weeks i found out that my big ovary cyst has been gone and i cancelled my surgery date that was suggested by doctors as an emergency. So i know i did the right thing by staying married nd i knkw found my piece nd i turned to god nd i know he will not let me down. It is very hard and i know u relate to me and i just hope for the best to come ur way suzie. Hang in there keep praying and enjoy in little things he gives u and it will be ok i guess. 💜

  • @kristofelalcantara5033
    @kristofelalcantara50335 жыл бұрын

    Thank you father mike, our Lord used you as an instrument to convey the message of what our God want to tell us. watching here from 🇵🇭

  • @lawrencekeenan9234
    @lawrencekeenan92345 жыл бұрын

    #1 Sign is Father Mike showing up in a video talking about it 🙄

  • @misstropicanna14

    @misstropicanna14

    5 жыл бұрын

    Lawrence Keenan Can't even tell you how much this has happened to me too. First video on my feed & it's exactly my life. God is always right on time & apparently does so thru Father Mike

  • @joekaminski9263
    @joekaminski92635 жыл бұрын

    I can totally relate! Now I see myself as others see me. Thank you, Father Mike!

  • @ayocharliee
    @ayocharliee5 жыл бұрын

    Beautiful message! This opened my eyes to Love in a new way. Fr. Mike spitting flames🙏🏼🙏🏼😤

  • @patricialong7047
    @patricialong70475 жыл бұрын

    Father Mike - this was the best, most insightful explanation I have ever heard. And it hit me right where I live. Ouch. I needed this. Thank you.

  • @rockycooks
    @rockycooks5 жыл бұрын

    Love your videos Father Mike. This stonewalling was happening to me with my brother but I learned to look into his eyes with the gaze of Jesus. Great teaching!

  • @sapphirestoker5555
    @sapphirestoker55555 жыл бұрын

    Hi from the UK Father Mike, watching you brightens up my day, every Wednesday.

  • @alondrarangel1334
    @alondrarangel13345 жыл бұрын

    Father Mike, I SEE YOU!! This video came right on time. Thanks and God bless.

  • @adrianaquintero2088
    @adrianaquintero20885 жыл бұрын

    just what I needed to hear. thank you! making someone feel like they are not seen - ufffffff something dies when someone looks at you, without seeing you. how special to feel someone sees you.

  • @sddancer
    @sddancer5 жыл бұрын

    Looking forward to the videos on the other three of the four horsemen!!!!

  • @itsme-dm2fv
    @itsme-dm2fv5 жыл бұрын

    God bless you Father keep up the evangelizing🙏👍

  • @kjorsss429
    @kjorsss4295 жыл бұрын

    This is great teaching, thank you Fr Mike. I would like to hear about the other 3 signs too

  • @srosececilia
    @srosececilia5 жыл бұрын

    I'm taking a class on exactly this topic, and reading John Gottman's books and I'm so happy you're talking about it! I've been wanting a christian standpoint on all of it because it is all so interesting to me but faith is so important for relationships too. It's like two worlds collide 😂

  • @elizabethramirez9682
    @elizabethramirez96825 жыл бұрын

    Great content Fr. Mike!!!! You're absolutely hilarious!!! God bless you!

  • @annabrook633
    @annabrook6335 жыл бұрын

    Oh wow Fr. Mike! This is something no one ever addresses and yet it’s so important!! You have an amazing way of explaining all of these things so well and I really appreciate all your wisdom! God bless your work, you are in my prayers, the world needs more of this wonderful and encouraging insight!!

  • @franh8043
    @franh80435 жыл бұрын

    Thank you, Fr. Mike, for your valuable lesson and encouragement. I will try harder to be a loving person starting today.

  • @marvinmansueto6081
    @marvinmansueto60815 жыл бұрын

    Great video Fr. Mike. Watching this video reminded me once, in some podcast, you mentioned how indifference was cruel coz it literally starved people little by little...stonewalling is sheer indifference. Been there, done that me too. Need to check my attitude. Thank you for highlighting certain aspects that we dont really give much attention to, yet they are corrosive.

  • @misstropicanna14
    @misstropicanna145 жыл бұрын

    I honestly don't know what I would do without Father Mike. I stumbled across his videos by accident on Google looking for something to explain lent to a non Catholic and thought oh this guy looks approachable and it's only 7 min long. Now I watch old or new videos every single day. I was born and raised Catholic but man, he makes me cry in every video. He brings me closer to my faith & to God with every video. Christ shines through this man like the brightest light. I've never seen anything like it. Please never stop making these videos. They give me so much strength and my kids love them too. Much love & prayers to you Father Mike. God BLESS you & the work you do. Those who work close to you are so lucky to have you. I wish there was more out there like you.

  • @anameryrivera351
    @anameryrivera3513 жыл бұрын

    i was really looking for subjects like this, and i typed this subjects with catholic behind. and there you are. thank you, you are such a nice person, and the way you speak is just plain lovely. thank you Father.

  • @michaelobrien4554
    @michaelobrien45545 жыл бұрын

    Oh my gosh Love this guy he's so funny and always leads me to Christ. Thank you Father Mike!

  • @lydiaannmartinez451
    @lydiaannmartinez4513 жыл бұрын

    Good morning Fr. Mike. I wake up every morning looking forward to listening to your podcast.. You always make my day.. listening to the positive starts my day on the right foot. Thank you for coming into my Life at a very difficult and somber time in my Life. Starting to feel good about myself again. Have an awesome Thursday. ♥️

  • @SMSP21
    @SMSP215 жыл бұрын

    I love the last part especially the, "or keep it a secret, don't tell anyone and you just start loving people.." Starting it with oneself. 🙂. Thank you Fr Mike! Continue to be a blessing! --- but I can't help it. I really have to share it with my family and friends. It's sooo worth the share 🙂🙂🙂.

  • @bobbidipasquale9043
    @bobbidipasquale90435 жыл бұрын

    You are the best! Peace, Father Mike.

  • @kynnykokoro2080
    @kynnykokoro20805 жыл бұрын

    This was beautiful. I have done this so many times and I feel bad for my fiance. He's so wonderful to me. I feel like stumbling upon this video, and the fact that it just popped up in my suggestions, may have just saved our future marriage.

  • @ZARAxELF95
    @ZARAxELF955 жыл бұрын

    Woow... Fr. Mike you are such a blessing... You know, I didn't even notice that I do this often. Sometimes these attitudes and behaviors are just so common that we don't even notice doing it until it's pointed out. Thank you so much for this video father.

  • @shannw0129
    @shannw01295 жыл бұрын

    Love your show Father. ❤

  • @meggyg8089
    @meggyg80895 жыл бұрын

    Father Mike... I see you!!

  • @theBadKid1
    @theBadKid15 жыл бұрын

    That’s what my boyfriend did to me all the time when I was so excited and happy, was Talking about hobbies etc, he was always being totally indifferent and cold. And that’s the tricky thing because the ignored person can’t explain what hurts him or her so much. And may be called demanding or nagging... Yep, and right after getting that Habit he left me

  • @amare.adonai5464

    @amare.adonai5464

    5 жыл бұрын

    I'm sorry to hear that.. I'm sure you'll find someone who will share into your happiness

  • @carriehenry6721

    @carriehenry6721

    3 жыл бұрын

    You'll find the right one...

  • @wishingonthemoon1

    @wishingonthemoon1

    2 жыл бұрын

    You dodged a bullet ❤️

  • @theBadKid1

    @theBadKid1

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@carriehenry6721​ @Amare. Adonai thank you, i did, and now my husband's really the opposite person. Without this knowledge and experience who knows if I appreciated him enough.

  • @theBadKid1

    @theBadKid1

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@wishingonthemoon1 thank you! just wasted some years, but ok, it was worth it

  • @williamkalina3535
    @williamkalina35355 жыл бұрын

    Thank you this was a golden tid bit if any. I've done this countless times. Thank you for making it so clear! Bravo!

  • @daphnepennison1223
    @daphnepennison12235 жыл бұрын

    That is a super insightful video, thank you for sharing! I think it really points out something that I hadn’t thought of before!

  • @christinepetracca5201
    @christinepetracca52013 жыл бұрын

    Oh my goodness Fr. Mike!!! Thank you so much for bringing this “stonewalling” to my attention. I didn’t realize that I have been doing this for years. Wow! So humbling 😥

  • @lydiaannmartinez451
    @lydiaannmartinez4513 жыл бұрын

    Stonewalling can be hurtful.. brings your moral down.. your video has helped me to deal with this issue in the future. Thanks Father Mike..👍🏽

  • @BoycottYouTube2023
    @BoycottYouTube20235 жыл бұрын

    Father Mike does it again, this is great! 👀🙏🏽💕

  • @luluq01
    @luluq015 жыл бұрын

    Thank you so very much for speaking to me today via this video. It help me look into issues happening in my life at the moment. Need God’s Grace to carry on.

  • @MJT409
    @MJT4095 жыл бұрын

    Hi Fr Mike, another great video. Thanks from the U.K. 👍

  • @marianafaria6960
    @marianafaria69605 жыл бұрын

    Wow! This came at a right time for me! Thank you.

  • @yustmeok
    @yustmeok3 жыл бұрын

    You're amazing Fr. Mike, the Holy Spirit is with you

  • @herminiasantos9981
    @herminiasantos99813 жыл бұрын

    Its such a blessing...your past videos are still n will always be relevant...it does occur in all kinds of relationships .Even within the family...I am referring to "stone - walling".its just 8days after New Year and your video signals a challenge for me....Thanks so much.God bless you always...You have been a big part of my spiritual journey since the pandemic...in the beginning my heart was " rebelling" against so many restrictions specially not being allowed to go to Mass...I felt like the pandemic had as it were taken God from me...and then I discovered streaming of masses and talks n videos etc.God is and was and always will be there thru His dearest friends our priests .And from all over the world...I realized how important the role of priests were...My prayers are with you and for all priests committed to their ministry...Our God is awesome...He is always there if we seek Him...

  • @thecalderasiblings7198
    @thecalderasiblings71985 жыл бұрын

    Father Mike I just want to say it was an honor hearing what you had to tell us about how to trust God and how beautiful and loving our God is. Youth day was beautiful it was my first time seeing you and hearing what you had to say. I was really hoping I had a chance to meat you and talk to you, but I was far away from you in the Arena and a lot of people were probably also there to see you. Well at least I saw you and heard you, hopefully I meant you one day Mike. Hopefully you come again to LA youth day 2020. Much love Fr. Mike and keep doing what you do for people understand how God is loving 🙏🏽

  • @barryhudson8747
    @barryhudson87475 жыл бұрын

    Father Mike, thank you for this video!

  • @abayineshmulgeta
    @abayineshmulgeta6 ай бұрын

    Thank You Father Mike! You are making my life brighter ever.

  • @plussportive
    @plussportive5 жыл бұрын

    Father you are doing a great job. Christ be with you

  • @randomelvis3359
    @randomelvis33595 жыл бұрын

    If you notice a partner “Stonewalling” you, there’s a massive chance they’ve always done it and you’re becoming aware of this abuse...celebrate, you’re outgrowing this partner move on and meet those types that will treat you as you deserve to be treated...we meet to grow, sometimes this isn’t together... healthy boundaries will see you right....

  • @dorothymorris2475

    @dorothymorris2475

    5 жыл бұрын

    @@mudkipx9052 You don't have to live in an abusive relationship. You can leave. You probably should if there are children involved although I do realise it is not always easy to find somewhere safe to go.

  • @fandoms5ever

    @fandoms5ever

    5 жыл бұрын

    Couples therapy? Nothing will change if you take no action. You may be able to find new appreciation and affection if you both commit to working on it which takes time and vulnerability but it may be worth it to not live the rest of your life unfulfilled. There is no shame in seeking this kind of help as there is no shame in going to a doctor when you are sick. You deserve the best chance at a happy life. God bless.

  • @deRose03

    @deRose03

    5 жыл бұрын

    This is absolutely terrible. You are not a dog to obey, you are a woman who fully deserves to be treated with love and respect! If your husband mistreats you, it’s abuse which breaks the sacred covenant between the two of you. You aren’t married anymore. This isn’t marriage and it was never intended to be a “cross to bear” because God never wants you to be in this “marital” misery. Marriage is supposed to be a joyful union full of love and understanding - not a never-ending nightmare of abuse and disrespect. When the Bible says you can only divorce due to adultery, it doesn’t imply that you can’t also divorce due to abuse. Lots of other “crimes” committed against the spouse would constitute “breach of covenant”, not just adultery. It is better to be alone than to live like this.

  • @sandwichguy1997
    @sandwichguy19975 жыл бұрын

    Awesome :) Thank you Fr. Mike

  • @eleanornajar3702
    @eleanornajar37025 жыл бұрын

    Very well said Father Mike .. New viewer here from Cali .. Looking forward to your videos. Thanks & God Bless

  • @Phoenix_7568
    @Phoenix_75683 жыл бұрын

    I love your topics, they're so applicable to my life. Thank you.

  • @donaldrulason2608
    @donaldrulason26085 жыл бұрын

    Appreciate this video I am guilty of being critical. what I didnt know I was doing was stone walling. I constantly am down playing someone elses problems with the idea some have it worse. I avoid eye contact and dissociate from reality beacuse it is easier then seeing them. I am 23 and plan on starting RCIA after my basic training. I have always felt alone until considering the catolic faith.I have never had a relationship with god, and I feel this is helping me become a better man. haveing relationships with other people I am learning is part of a realationship with god. Taking responsiblity for this is what being a man is about. Thank you speaking in a logical way that engages me.

  • @owenjosephking7396
    @owenjosephking73965 жыл бұрын

    God Bless you from Bonnie Scotland !!!

  • @houseofballet
    @houseofballet5 жыл бұрын

    One of your best videos ever

  • @wisemanstudio
    @wisemanstudio5 жыл бұрын

    Probably your best video.

  • @keisyventura8692
    @keisyventura86924 ай бұрын

    I LOVED THIS. I have just started to reverse to Catholicism a couple of months ago (Thanks Ascension Presents!) and one of my fears was that I would need to give up my favorite hobbie. I am a massive NERD for the science of love, sex and relationships and find Dr. Gottman's work awe-inspiring. I feel reasured that I can continue to look at his work even as a catholic, and embrace that part of myself. Thank you very much for this gift.

  • @rudyrodriguez1471
    @rudyrodriguez14718 ай бұрын

    Father Mike ❤❤❤. You are really a man of God! Every time I listen to your messages, my (FAITH) grows.. Love you Fratello!!

  • @MrBetyca
    @MrBetyca5 жыл бұрын

    Hi father, thank you for my richer vocabulary. I didn't know that stonewalling exists. And it is pretty funny thing to realise the word describes me. Thank you for that! Croatia sees you, but sometimes me too.

  • @gillianpedersen52
    @gillianpedersen525 жыл бұрын

    your advice helps like always

  • @rosemarymaher6726
    @rosemarymaher67265 жыл бұрын

    Very good.I have experienced this. Keep up the good work.

  • @elenaserna8315
    @elenaserna83154 жыл бұрын

    This video is a great Eye-opener, god bless you!

  • @evarosag.8810
    @evarosag.88105 жыл бұрын

    Thank you Fr. Mike☺God bless

  • @ucheuju9348
    @ucheuju93485 жыл бұрын

    I am equally guilty of this.God bless you Fr Mike.

  • @miraelizabethp9938
    @miraelizabethp99385 жыл бұрын

    Great video and sharing 💕 i shall do my best to follow those advices.

  • @CedanyTheAlaskan
    @CedanyTheAlaskan3 жыл бұрын

    This video has just made me realize why my last relationship failed

  • @patriciakimes1795
    @patriciakimes179511 сағат бұрын

    “I respect and appreciate the saying use your freedom to serve one another in love.”❤ What type of look is acceptable to share with others if I am a married woman or person in a serious relationship with someone else? I would guess a look of respect, non flirting, not indifferent, definitely caring and respectful, and communicating concern for others and each person I come into contact with (yes, wholeheartedly agree with that), but non sexual and non romantic and non flirtatious, not saying I want your intimacy or your sex because I am taken, but I respect you and want to simply acknowledge you and recognize that you are human and this could be in need of assistance or help it support. And, if I know that I cannot provide that support for you directly, then I am available and accessible and willing to assist you in crisis and especially get you help to the best of my ability at this point. I am a responsible accountable person, a d living and being a public person and citizen to any extent is a privilege, and it is my responsibility to be if service to others, especially elderly or disabled persons.”

  • @user-lx2wh8qv3b
    @user-lx2wh8qv3b7 ай бұрын

    Just recently my relationship with a good friend of mine kinda seemed a bit off, and it's because of pride. My parents also told me to stay away from people who don't serve me right, and me as someone who chooses to understand people and situations got burnt out by loving people and i don't get the same treatment in return. So i decided to follow their advice, asked if it's okay to also think of myself at some time and just do the stone walling thing because that's what this friend of mine just gives off. Then here i am stumbling on this post reminding me again that we are all called to love even most difficult once. God bless you Fr. Mike, shalom 🕊️🙏

  • @jasondesilva4108
    @jasondesilva41085 жыл бұрын

    Thank you for this . This convicted me

  • @gospelafric
    @gospelafric3 жыл бұрын

    You’re such a Friendly sort I love listening to you

  • @NoteworthyNow
    @NoteworthyNow Жыл бұрын

    Thank you Father Mike.

  • @udavis8307
    @udavis83074 жыл бұрын

    As a therapist who uses the Gottman method in couples counseling, I must attest to the accuracy here. Thanks, Father Mike.

  • @zrobert66
    @zrobert665 жыл бұрын

    Thank you Fr. Mike

  • @ryousseph30
    @ryousseph305 жыл бұрын

    thank you for this video. God bless

  • @imommtube
    @imommtube5 жыл бұрын

    As always so wonderful, thanks a lot.

  • @EverydayCatholic
    @EverydayCatholic5 жыл бұрын

    Great video & message

  • @bettyfisher6891
    @bettyfisher68913 жыл бұрын

    You are awesome! Thank you for these videos!

  • @jooby4785
    @jooby47854 жыл бұрын

    This is some good advice... As always

  • @jasonkeller4929
    @jasonkeller49294 жыл бұрын

    I’m loving this video!

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