Should I End It Or Wait For My Husband to Love Me Again - The Dr. Joe Show

Ойын-сауық

Source:
www.spreaker.com/user/marriag...
He claimed that God told him to leave his marriage. Later he said that he felt guilt for leaving.
He said "I love you but am not in love with you." Later he said, "I don't know how to live my life without you."
Then, almost out of the blue, he says "I am in love with you" but he continues to live with the other woman.
What do you do? Do you wait for him to evolve back to wanting to be with you over her? Do you go ahead and divorce him and get on with your life?
In this program, Dr. Joe Beam, along with his special guest, relationship expert Jim Pourteau, answers the woman's question. You'll hear her describe the situation and ask what she should do. You'll hear the expert explanation of what is going on with her husband, You may be surprised when you hear the answer to her question about whether to divorce or to wait.
For more free resources for your marriage go to www.MarriageHelper.com. You can also find more free podcasts by subscribing to Marriage Radio on iTunes or Google Play. You can find all of Dr. Beam's podcasts free on www.MarriageRadio.com.
If you would like to speak to one of Dr. Beam's associates about your marriage, call 615-472-1161.
Would you like to ask Dr. Beam a question about your marriage or relationship? You can record your question for Dr. Beam to reply in a future podcast at www.speakpipe.com/joebeam.

Пікірлер: 73

  • @donnaallgaier-lamberti3933
    @donnaallgaier-lamberti39333 жыл бұрын

    I was married at age 19 to my husband. It was rocky for 23 of the 24 years. I waited for 10 years. Then I finally gave up and moved forward. Several years later I remarried to my current husband and I have had more love, respect and happiness in the last 24 years than I had in my first 24-year marriage. You deserve better.

  • @Josh-si4rx
    @Josh-si4rx2 жыл бұрын

    The problem of divorce is that it can end up causing so much more damage than if the two were to try to work it out, and it repels them away from each other in irreversible ways. It’s too destructive and causes too much pain. This is my experience. I was willing to try to reconcile until something in me snapped, and because of what my wife has said and done, I now see her as evil, vindictive, cruel and not someone that I can trust my heart and feelings with. She has stomped my heart right in front of me too many times and now I hate her.

  • @youtubeuser0528

    @youtubeuser0528

    2 жыл бұрын

    What happened? Did y'all divorce?

  • @123marchello
    @123marchello Жыл бұрын

    What a lovely women. I wish her happiness! I can feel her deep worth, he can’t, it’s really his loss now. And I don’t say that maliciously. I really hope someone scoops her up & shows her such worth. She deserves respect. I don’t think he regards her. So she needs to regard herself. Don’t ever wait or chase. Just concentrate on your PIES & watch God place you in the place you need to be. Wait on God! You sweep your side & let God do the rest.❤️

  • @alinabrito8576
    @alinabrito85765 жыл бұрын

    Cheaters will say ANYTHING to justify their behaviour. Also a great hit "it's all your fault"

  • @Littlebigbot

    @Littlebigbot

    4 жыл бұрын

    Or "it was only a kiss".

  • @MaRiAm936

    @MaRiAm936

    3 жыл бұрын

    @@Littlebigbot or "we are just friends "

  • @joyofsalvation100
    @joyofsalvation1005 жыл бұрын

    If you live biblically, even if you make mistake you will want to Love your spouse.

  • @tilu3303

    @tilu3303

    Жыл бұрын

    Absolutely - true love is a choice based on commitment, not feelings or emotion.

  • @rosettemarshall3024
    @rosettemarshall30244 жыл бұрын

    My husband has attributes of a narcissist. I heard you say he is out getting something he is not getting at home. I have reason to be in the street trying to get what I'm missing at home also but I am a mature adult and I know that all I'm gonna find in the street is evil and diseases! I got married so I would not have to worry about these things but I married the wrong one!

  • @Renea559

    @Renea559

    Жыл бұрын

    I know marry for love and commitment and to not have single or promiscuous people problems🙇‍♀️

  • @celinaverma9661
    @celinaverma96614 жыл бұрын

    I wonder had this been the other way round. I would surmise most men would hv already made their judgements. How many men out there would be willing to take their wives bck had she been in this situation. I don't think limerence is sudden. It happens over a period of time. So if you value your own self respect n your wives you would be alert about how deep this could pull you in, hence pulling out at the right time might show some maturity. But if you are selfish n go all out hurting the person who has already invested in you, and then think you hv the audacity of coming bck after putting her through hell, that is another selfish act. She probably would be in a stage of moving on n you come bck to be accepted after having your fun, hence confusing her emotionally again. How is that acceptable.

  • @hollyalgeo7791

    @hollyalgeo7791

    4 жыл бұрын

    Is this the bad person doing the bad thing habitually? That is the question.

  • @davidsoom1551
    @davidsoom15513 жыл бұрын

    God spoke to him? God didn't say a very Godly thing. Yeah, go and not feel guilt. Total BS

  • @wifeofhighwater
    @wifeofhighwater5 жыл бұрын

    How does a standing spouse overcome being vilified to the point of the leaving spouse not seeing any of the good memories we made in our 25 year marriage, & being viewed as the worst person who ever lived?

  • @alinabrito8576

    @alinabrito8576

    5 жыл бұрын

    Sweetie, it is not you. He's making you to be the monster to somehow justify his behaviour. Don't fall for it.

  • @wildflower_gypsy

    @wildflower_gypsy

    4 жыл бұрын

    It ends...then serotonin returns and he realizes it wasn’t the magical fantasy he thought it was. then SHE becomes the mediocrity that ruined his life. But you cannot compete with limerence. Just BACK OFF and let it run it’s course...it is not easy to trust this process but this man knows what he’s talking about.

  • @hollyalgeo7791

    @hollyalgeo7791

    4 жыл бұрын

    Liz Brown open relationships

  • @raymondscallan4765

    @raymondscallan4765

    3 жыл бұрын

    I

  • @simpleoxfordenglish
    @simpleoxfordenglish6 жыл бұрын

    Great material! Thank you.

  • @triciad187
    @triciad1873 жыл бұрын

    He is with another woman i think you should move on .. He said he dont love you like that enough said to me.

  • @swabjocky52
    @swabjocky524 жыл бұрын

    This could pertain to either male as and female. “God speaking to him” was his subconscious struggling with poor self-perceptions is own and perceivdbjudgment society’s. self awareness and needing to feel okay for doing what was previously

  • @sds6303
    @sds63033 жыл бұрын

    He's saying it bc he wants to have his cake & eat it too. He's using religion as an excuse for his actions. Move on with your life, he has so many issues that you can't fix. You deserve so much better.

  • @clairebrown9402
    @clairebrown94022 жыл бұрын

    He specifically said. No divorce. Because he loses everything from.

  • @clairebrown9402
    @clairebrown94022 жыл бұрын

    He smashed my kitchen window in, with som in front of. With sledgehammer. I called police.

  • @clairebrown9402
    @clairebrown94022 жыл бұрын

    But? Has no plans if new plans. And has been gaslighting. Telling me things, lies, trying to convince me was truth that I know isn’t. I am villian. He isn’t a bad man.

  • @roundandsquareful
    @roundandsquareful4 жыл бұрын

    The husband is putting it on God ("God told me to leave") so he doesn't have to take responsibility for himself. This wife needs better boundaries.... she's put up with his vacilations too many times, so even he doens't know what he wants because he's been allowed to get away with everything so far.

  • @lipinghe4921
    @lipinghe49213 жыл бұрын

    Thank you and God bless you both.

  • @clairebrown9402
    @clairebrown94022 жыл бұрын

    He vilified me. Completely.

  • @clairebrown9402
    @clairebrown94022 жыл бұрын

    He only is indecisive, to try and save business and kids.

  • @katelyneortiz6602
    @katelyneortiz66023 жыл бұрын

    My husband had an relationship affair and he is confused on what he wants. I am standing but sometimes I do think that I should end it so that he realizes everything he is leaving.

  • @Maxxout

    @Maxxout

    3 жыл бұрын

    Be still and trust the Lord don't manipulate the situtation continue to grow stronger and become your best you..Im praying for you I'm there right now and I love my wife and believe God is a way maker be ready so you don't have to get ready..Question if he came home today would you be ready to love beyond yourself and not judge him?

  • @lideyadawite9599
    @lideyadawite95993 жыл бұрын

    A good man doing a bad thing 🤔 I thought I was the only one thinking this way...

  • @daysuntangled1530
    @daysuntangled15304 жыл бұрын

    Re: "gaslighting" I've never once heard someone on the internet use the term "gaslighting" to mean anything other than someone who's trying to surreptitiously drive someone else crazy. When this guy hears "everyone on the internet" using the word "gaslighting" incorrectly, how are they using it?

  • @kathleenwharton2139
    @kathleenwharton21395 жыл бұрын

    My husband and I were married 32 years and had five children. We married when we were young for vain reasons and did not check the most important thing! Our deepest values. We were both unhappy and struggled to keep things going because we were committed. But when our youngest child graduated high school he started looking for another woman. When I picked up on this I felt very betrayed and prayed very much. We had counseling and did everything we could do but nothing changed. God Told me..after counseling one night..we were waiting for a stop light at Broadway and El Dorado St. God told me it was time to allow the divorce so I did. We have both moved on and I have learned much from God since. I would not change things. God Does, indeed, Know the Right thing for you to do!

  • @joyofsalvation100

    @joyofsalvation100

    5 жыл бұрын

    The key was you both were unhappy.

  • @tonyslater4652
    @tonyslater46525 жыл бұрын

    My spouse divorced me because I took furniture and other belongings out the home not the affair but furniture after she told me we don’t ask each other questions about our whereabouts I then filed and moved out told her but dropped my divorce and returned furniture a month later she used the 1 year to keep me out

  • @asamusicdude
    @asamusicdude2 жыл бұрын

    So interesting that my mom was so rebellious for so many years Finally watching sermon videos PRAISE GOD.but now at the same time my wife files for divorce on no grounds whatsoever. No violence no bad words no abuse no Adultery and she goes to the church .God is in control. I'm not worried one bit. I know what God can do based on bible stories alone.let alone my experiences.

  • @clairebrown9402
    @clairebrown94022 жыл бұрын

    My husband isn’t a believer. I am. But I also see instance messages. Please help me.

  • @clairebrown9402
    @clairebrown94022 жыл бұрын

    I understand that.

  • @debrazamora5516
    @debrazamora55164 жыл бұрын

    My husband fell in love with a Instagram person I think it’s a catfish due to him never meeting her nor spoke on the phone only by texting eachother what should I do

  • @lashalllovett241
    @lashalllovett2415 жыл бұрын

    Yes God did tell him to leave her...... Not for him to be with the other women...... but for her not to suffer anymore with being married to him. He cheated on her so she has every right to Divorce him...... He broke the covenant.

  • @nothereanymore6463

    @nothereanymore6463

    4 жыл бұрын

    Only God can break the marriage covenant - that is through death of a covenant spouse. You are in a covenant until death period. You don’t have to live with your spouse but you are not free to have sexual relationships with anyone else. You are to reconcile or remain single. 1 Corinthians 7:10-11.

  • @BevBelove

    @BevBelove

    3 жыл бұрын

    @@nothereanymore6463 📢📢📢📢📢📢📢

  • @mmonnink6434

    @mmonnink6434

    3 жыл бұрын

    @@nothereanymore6463 nail on the head, divorce is just made an option because of hardness of heart but it’s never been mentioned it is supported in any way by God

  • @clairebrown9402
    @clairebrown94022 жыл бұрын

    I don’t think I can. Anymore.

  • @clairebrown9402
    @clairebrown94022 жыл бұрын

    He still doesn’t understand cause. Blames me? Kids? My family. Not financially problems. At start.

  • @shardaramsingh6272
    @shardaramsingh62723 жыл бұрын

    I am in that same position

  • @clairebrown9402
    @clairebrown94022 жыл бұрын

    He is a good man.

  • @clairebrown9402
    @clairebrown94022 жыл бұрын

    Our business must go. With divorce. No way way back from business.

  • @clairebrown9402
    @clairebrown94022 жыл бұрын

    Trying his best. But not listening to my business head. And yes limerance.

  • @sandiedwards9655
    @sandiedwards96553 жыл бұрын

    Oh No!! What if I’ve mentioned Limerence to my husband? I doubt he will really remember it but what if I also explained it a little?

  • @tawanawright3334

    @tawanawright3334

    3 жыл бұрын

    Me too I sent him the video 🤦🏾‍♀️

  • @stephaniecarlson3804
    @stephaniecarlson38045 жыл бұрын

    What if he doesnt show ANY feelings except anger when I ask him any questions? And he says they are just talking about cars (they met at work car dealership). He switched jobs months ago but still has her and wont stop though I have asked. I even told him that he needed to atleast take a break till he figured out his life. We also have 2 young children which I havnt seen any advice about either.

  • @KC-jh4lg

    @KC-jh4lg

    4 жыл бұрын

    Stephanie Carlson was dud F Edds y ft schedule ddI

  • @clairebrown9402
    @clairebrown94022 жыл бұрын

    Been ten years. Seen first affair ten years. Know? It’s nearly need. Because I will force him facing financial facts.

  • @clairebrown9402
    @clairebrown94022 жыл бұрын

    Not better. Easily.

  • @catherinedelacerna9890
    @catherinedelacerna98903 жыл бұрын

    I rather continue to end our marriage, than to love again my husband, only God knows why and what the reason is...

  • @clairebrown9402
    @clairebrown94022 жыл бұрын

    And yes. He is. He is confused.

  • @maryrose1701
    @maryrose17015 жыл бұрын

    I think guy would sooner find anouther lady than work on any problems . So is this called the grass is greener on the other side

  • @clairebrown9402
    @clairebrown94022 жыл бұрын

    I am doing pies, and smart contact.

  • @clairebrown9402
    @clairebrown94022 жыл бұрын

    In our law? He gets nothing.

  • @clairebrown9402
    @clairebrown94022 жыл бұрын

    Because I faced to force? He started first affair.

  • @splouffy
    @splouffy5 жыл бұрын

    Always ask yourself how you have contributed to your own experience.

  • @africanqueenmo

    @africanqueenmo

    5 жыл бұрын

    Ashton Gilmore excuse me? Are you saying the man's affair is his wife's contribution? Sorry the lady sounds like a very reasonable person who is ready to forgive and to take responsibility for her role in the affair if he is ready to reconcile. It's certainly NOT the wife's fault that her husband has strayed and is filled with mixed feelings.

  • @rosettemarshall3024

    @rosettemarshall3024

    4 жыл бұрын

    @@africanqueenmo I agree. We are just as hurt as they are. Why not seek your spouse instead of whores in the street???

  • @bobbob9364
    @bobbob93643 жыл бұрын

    Get him an Xbox sit him in the corner ,don’t interrupt ,sorted

  • @clairebrown9402
    @clairebrown94022 жыл бұрын

    I forced. With her. And he doesn’t like much. 🤣🤣🤣

  • @steve69chevy
    @steve69chevy5 жыл бұрын

    Multiple wives ., girls ., etc are written in the bible .,

  • @manolitawhite6112

    @manolitawhite6112

    5 жыл бұрын

    ,,,,,,

  • @nothereanymore6463

    @nothereanymore6463

    4 жыл бұрын

    Jesus came to clarify the law. That no longer stands. One marriage for life until death. Period.

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