Rethinking Consequences in Parenting
Time-out. Dinner without dessert. No screen time. If you’re like most parents, you’ve reached your wit’s end and threatened your kid with one (or all!) of these consequences. Then the next day… they’re back to throwing blocks. How many times do you have to yell, “If you throw that block one more time, no ______!” What if we told you there was a better way? In this week’s episode, Dr. Becky explores the problem with consequences and how you can parent much more effectively without them. Don’t worry: This doesn’t mean letting your kid “get away” with challenging or dangerous behavior. It means embodying your authority, connecting to your child, and teaching them the life-long skills they need to manage big feelings. If you love the Good Inside approach and struggle with the idea of no consequences, one thing is true: This episode is for you.
Listen to the full episode: • If I Don’t Punish My K...
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Пікірлер: 12
I think when a person actually listens to what you’re saying there isn’t confusion on what you’re conveying. The skills and growth mindset is the focused not punishment focused. Although there might be some of it the focus is about learning the skills. So good. ❤❤❤❤
No, it is not how the body works. Children do not think about consequences before being violent with their siblings. Much as a murderer does not think about receiving a life sentence while killing someone. Or a teenager while stealing at the mail, until they are placed in a holding cell and now have a record that permanently limits job opportunities. I’m currently reading Dr. Becky’s book, which is helpful in some ways. But children must learn consequences if they are to become functional members of society.
This is so ridiculous. "Do we want to teach them that actions have consequences or do we want to teach them skills you can learn so you have control over your actions." What world is she living in? If I say, "Clean your room," and my kid says, "No, I don't want to," their not cleaning their room is not a product of a lack of control, skills, etc. It's a lack of desire given what the expect the outcome to be. They say "No," precisely because they expect to be able to move on with their life without doing so. "All right, well you don't need to clean your room, but you are not going outside to play with your friends until it's clean."
Thank you so much, this is really clever, and communicated in a way that’s very clear and relatable to, for people without an academic psychology background. I heard you on Zoe Blaskey’s podcast and thought you sounded a bit clever! I’ll watch some more, thanks 😊
This all sounds good in theory but not realistic. Kids game the system. And parents donthave 24 hours to constantly be kind parents. Should kids be late to school? Sports? Lessons? All the time? Because this is what this would lead to. And parents do have to sleep, work, shower, go to the bathroom .
A person has to be born "good inside"....either they are good or they are not....you can't teach good.
The information could have been put in less time. People don’t have time to listen to bla-bla-bla these days.