I know we try to limit the divorce cries, but I really think OP 1 needs to divorce her husband. Not only is her husband mentally abusing her, but his behavior is also dangerous to their daughter. The whole thing with punching a hole in the door is a HUGE red flag. Keep the food, leave the husband.

@sattelyte5316

11 ай бұрын

"you need to start losing weight WHILE FEEDING 2 PEOPLE WITH YOUR OWN BODY" yeah, thats definitely divorce territory. edit: continued watching and I am ready to commit murder for this woman..

@seekeroftruth6728

11 ай бұрын

So she can be an overweight single mom? This is exactly why women shouldn't take advice from women.

@BeatlesPlotagonShow

11 ай бұрын

OP was filing for divorce in the update

@hiroshi7025

11 ай бұрын

Both OPs do. Emotional neglect, blackmail or straight up emotional and verbal abvses. Their SOs all suck.

@Cman04092

11 ай бұрын

Yeah, i get what your saying, sometimes people throw out divorce as the first option on reddit, generally against husbands. Like, "me and my husband had a normal argument over how to raise the kids or money or whatever" and people on reddit be like "girl leave him, blah blah blah". but in this case, divorce is definitely the right call, this is friggen abuse.

Yeah no that guy who called his pregnant wife a cow is a garbage person and should be treated as such

@Ironraven001

11 ай бұрын

Put in a plastic bag and thrown into a compactor, then the landfill. 100%.

@dovahkiin6488

11 ай бұрын

Toss him in a woodchipper

@Wendy_O._Koopa

11 ай бұрын

But like with his whole "cows eat grass and produce milk just fine" defense (flawed as it is)... are you going to at least give her "grass" (celery sticks, salads, other vegan stuff)? Because he was just throwing away _all_ of her food. If I didn't know any better, I'd swear he was literally trying to kill her via "criminal negligence" or something.

@WyntheRogue

11 ай бұрын

@@Wendy_O._Koopa That or listening to the cancer that's those misogynistic "Alpha/sigma/whatever" male podcasts thinking this is somehow how you're supposed to act rather than being a kind and loving partner who understands that babies when in the womb are more or less literal parasites [they feed off the woman's nutrients after all] Someone who understands nobody keeps a picture perfect body after giving birth and helps their partners recover properly via rest and getting said nutrients back. So sick of these shallow fucks thinking it's okay to treat women like crap. 😕

@Furi_GYT

11 ай бұрын

My father is like that, I expected this to be more common -

That second one fucking.... hurt. My parents are in a 30 year marriage that is extremely loving and passionate to this day. My siblings and I adore my dad. My mom makes extra nice steaks for Fathers Day and prime rib for his birthday. My sister, an artist, has made her several pieces, something she hasn't done for anyone else in the family. I crochet'd him a blanket for his birthday, which he still uses. I cannot imagine any of us treating my dad the way they treated the OP. Absolutely disgusting.

@peterhobson3262

11 ай бұрын

My parents were married for over 60 years before my father died. While my parents' marriage had its ups and downs, it was obvious to everyone that they loved each other. After my father died my mother told my wife and me that she was sorry she and my father never went to Antarctica because she would have liked to have made love to him on each continent. Considering they were in their 70s when they went to Australia I guess they were still sexually active then.

@S_H9260

11 ай бұрын

​@@peterhobson3262it sounds like your parents set a wonderful example of what a loving relationship could be like.

@It-is-me...Melsie

11 ай бұрын

I just feel so sad for him. Just imagining the loneliness, disappointment, and heavy feeling on what his supposed to be a special day for you and wandering around a quiet house, perhaps still holding on to a bit of hope they may come through. Just awful.

@dragonfliesnh4204

11 ай бұрын

Reading about you and your family is the sweetest thing I've heard in a while! I'm so glad you have such a wonderful family

@It-is-me...Melsie

11 ай бұрын

@@dragonfliesnh4204 You're so right! That was lovely to read. Particularly among all the horrible and sad stories of people not treating each other well.

That first story crushed me. When I was breastfeeding, my husband applauded every drop I was able to get. He wrapped me up and made me so comfy. Poor mom.

@stormyspark1

11 ай бұрын

I feel the same way, the first time I produced over an ounce my husband was so excited and proud. I really hope OP realizes that men are not 'wired that way'.

@jenniferhart559

11 ай бұрын

Mine wouldn't latch, so I ended up pumping / feeding with a bottle. Husband was the stay home parent, and very supportive of me doing whatever I could to pump for as long as I could. We were poor, and I needed WIC to supplement my diet. Eventually, I was losing weight despite WIC, and also losing my milk supply... I could see the loss of ounces because I pumped. WIC weighed me, and I was "still within normal range," so they wouldn't grant more food, but did give formula instead. At the time, the ideal was breast milk or formula for a year before switching to cow milk...we were around 9 months when I requested more food. Formula was crazy expensive even 23 years ago...WIC would've saved a couple hundred dollars by giving me more food for a few months!

"Cows eat grass and produce gallons of milk. What are you, a meat cow?" There is so much wrong with this sentence from an agricultural stand point and a relationship stand point...

@red0421

5 ай бұрын

People forget herbivores like cows WILL occasionally eat meat for the nutrients. OP deserves better.

@gwennorthcutt421

Ай бұрын

@@red0421 its not even that: cows are ruminants and can digest the celluose in grass. so grass for a cow is like grains for humans: a staple food that gives them energy. otherwise they'd have to be like elephants that are constantly eating to eke out enough calories from plants. a starving cow would also dry up and waste away.

@ArcanineEspeon

12 күн бұрын

Your username and pfp add even more interesting layers to your comment.

Second story: I know firsthand how destructive a parent bad-mouthing the other can affect a kid. Both my mom and dad did it (my dad did it more) and I'm still dealing with the consequences nearly 20 years later. Both relationships with my parents are iffy at best because of it. If you get divorced and have kids, don't do this. It's incredibly harmful and can really mess with your kids.

@Aranur

11 ай бұрын

I also come from a family like this. During arguments, when my dad would walk out the house or go on drives so on and so fourth to cool his head when arguments got THAT bad my mom would basically come to my sibling and I and say how bad he was he was a cheater(they both did it) he sucks as a father, he’s a worthless man, if we get divorced don’t go with him you won’t get anything, so on and so fourth. I’m in my 30s now still live with my parents(can’t get the finances and other means necessary to move out) and basically walk through the door at this point thinking “ok am I gonna walk into an argument?, what’s mom’s vibe like, what’s her tone like? Is she stressed? Why is she stressed, so on and so fourth, let me do this stuff around the house so she doesn’t come home mad and stressed cause she had a hard day at work.” Etc etc. yeah it’s bad, thanks to my partner and her help she’s been helping me see that honey you were abused as a child, mentally and emotionally scarred, and were only provided the basic needs if anything.

@cameronguzman-keller477

11 ай бұрын

@@AranurI really felt this 😭😭😭😭 growing up, my parents had a pretty toxic relationship that’s gotten a lot better in recent years, but there are still things from their fights that affect me and my brother to this day. I remember constantly asking my mom if she and my dad were getting along every day just so I could feel out the vibe and see if I wanted to be around them. My parents also talked a lot of shit about each other when they fought, both to me and my brother, which I realize now was incredibly inappropriate and does count as emotional abuse. I love my parents and do appreciate that their relationship is much healthier than it used to be, but I have issues regarding confrontation bc of how my parents used to fight back then. It does things to you when you’re caught up in it. I’m sorry you have to go through that as well :/ I hope your situation improves❤️

@jessicadriver1636

11 ай бұрын

That lady's just selfish and greedy and obviously teaching the girls those same "values" too. Dishonorable parents do not raise honorable children.

@Me-dr9dv

11 ай бұрын

Yeah, got to hear my parents scream at each other a lot during my childhood. Never really knew whose side to take (leaned towards one, but felt really bad for the other one to an extent). Felt more like a therapist/someone to vent to than a family member at times to both my parents and one of my siblings.

@oysterrant

11 ай бұрын

Unrelated but danger days pfp

My mom developed osteoporosis from breastfeeding because she avoids dairy due to being lactose intolerant. I have photos of her with me at around 2 months and 6 months and she looks like she was literally wasting away despite her saying she was always eating. Breastfeeding women NEED A TON of calories because your body is trying to feed the baby before it feeds you. I watched my cousin wake up in the middle of night and literally just eat a block of cheese from how starving she was. It’s literally inhumane to make a woman who’s breastfeeding lose weight. Babies need to eat a ton because of how fast they grow

@HyperShadow991

11 ай бұрын

a WHOLE damn block of cheese!!??? bro i love cheese but holy shit

@shanelbryant5638

11 ай бұрын

@@HyperShadow991 she was hungry. I was so sleepy I think I just asked if she wanted crackers for it or something.

@shadowpadinc.2058

11 ай бұрын

there are other sources of calcium she could have gone to that don't affect those with lactose intolerance even though milk is the highest source.

@shanelbryant5638

11 ай бұрын

@@shadowpadinc.2058 oh absolutely but this was in the early 90s and my mom stopped having health insurance about a month or two after I was born so it wasn’t like anybody would have known to tell her

@aduckofsomesort

11 ай бұрын

@@shanelbryant5638yeah there’s been a lot of changes in the last 30 years that make a world of difference to pregnant people and their new babies

Second story is depressing, OP deserves so much better, she’s poisoned his own kids against him, she treats him like a bank and punching bag, and she’s only “sorry” when realising her meal ticket will disappear. OP, you deserve much better in life, you need a divorce.

@laurencesnee8362

11 ай бұрын

Women like her make me sick. Who says men cannot be abused?

I’m just going to come out and say that despite what people believe, losing weight by starving yourself or someone else is NOT healthy. You end up losing MUSCLE weight instead of FAT weight. If you don’t consume enough, your body will start eating away at your muscle and even your own organs. Healthy diets and exercise are how you should lose weight. But forcing that onto someone else, let alone your own wife who’s giving so much of her calories to caring for your child, is a horrible thing to do. That’s insanely abusive.

@Ironraven001

11 ай бұрын

Especially when breastfeeding!!!!!

@LordCoeCoe

11 ай бұрын

1. You are wrong, you are going to lose fat before muscle. You will lose muscle if you eat absolutely nothing for like a week. 2. No your body won't "eat" your organs. Like... No, that's not how it works.

@seekeroftruth6728

11 ай бұрын

Starving or eating junk food aren't the only two options. There are TONS of healthy foods that help milk production. OP clearly just wants her junk food.

@DepthPerceptionEnjoyer

11 ай бұрын

​@@seekeroftruth6728But... You do know that the husband threw out the Wife's food We cant determine if its junk food or healthy, but either way, you SHOULDNT THROW FOOD AWAY. A) It's a waste B) Just tell your wife and help her instead of CALLING HER A FAT COW

@InitialDraal

11 ай бұрын

I'm currently on a diet to go from 17% body fat to 13%. Let me tell you sometimes you starve but it's not bad starving, like you know you are just looking towards the next meal that's coming but you're not in a battery saving mode most of the time.

First story: shame on OP’s family for taking the side of her abusive POS husband. He didn’t marry her for love, he married her so she could be his pretty little trophy wife but seemed to forget what his vows truly meant. I’m glad she chose to get out. Story 2: OP’s family doesn’t deserve him. They’re a bunch of selfish leeches, the fact that the kids only reached out after he didn’t show up for their extracurricular activities because other people OUTSIDE of their family noticed he wasn’t there speaks volumes. The wife isn’t trying to save her marriage, she’s trying to save the current lifestyle she has.

@spydersoup8447

11 ай бұрын

First story: I get the feeling that they're all sexist, like they believe that all women are meant to be skinny and be the servant of their men.

@SrividyaS

6 ай бұрын

My mom stayed in a terrible relationship like this... This OP is lucky she had a good friend.. my mom was forced to stay because she had NOBODY

@brassbuckles

Ай бұрын

Second story, I think there's probably more to it than we're seeing and I think it's likely an ESH situation, not an OP is great and his wife and kids are jerks situation. OP looks great because he's the perspective we see. We might think differently if we heard from his wife or their kids. As hurt as he is, his wife is acting the way she is for reasons he doesn't understand and therefore we don't understand. I'm not saying there aren't awful people out there, but it sounds like they had many good years. Something changed. Could be as simple as menopause making her moodier and less frisky, could be there's something OP has done or has failed to do that his wife is absolutely done with, while he's utterly oblivious to it. Either way, their relationship did not come to that point without failings on both sides, even if the failing of one of them was simply a failure to communicate displeasure before it got this bad.

@TawnyRoyal

Ай бұрын

@@brassbuckles menopause isn’t an excuse to leech off/disrespect your partner who is making an effort to accommodate everyone while being neglected. They “forgot” Father’s Day and his birthday. They went out of their way to have a girls day on HIS DAYS that should’ve been about HIM. If the roles were reversed, you’d be going bonkers. The wife is a gaslighting POS and roped their kids into treating OP like a peasant/ATM while he funds their spoiled lifestyle. Again, they only noticed how much he does for them when people outside of the family were concerned and they probably only wanted to save face at the 4th of July function. If it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck…it’s a fucking duck.

@randomloseranddull1560

16 күн бұрын

​@brassbuckles there was an update, OP was a good father but the mom is still a POS who pulled his kids away from him. The OP did break down and admitted to his wife that he was so alone that he was suicidal and he broke down sobbing in front of his oldest. Both realized they effed up.

If the first OP were my friend and she called me to bring her food like that, I would say, "No sweetie. Pack a bag for yourself and your baby. I'm picking you up and getting you out of that house."

Story 1: Anybody that told op to "get over it" and tell her too prioritize the body her husband wants over her own health is a scum and seems like they would protect an abuser or enable it.

First story: That marriage isn't salvageable - not by a long shot. Either husband does a 180 and understands that he is an abusive and controlling butthole or there has to be a divorce, because it gets only worse from here and he might pose a danger for the baby.

@wildstorm3486

11 ай бұрын

He already is posing a danger to the baby. The mother collapsed over a half a dozen times because she was not getting enough calories. This in turn made her produce low amounts of milk. Which means she could not properly feed her baby. She needs to absolutely 1000% divorce that pos as soon as possible. And she also needs to cut out anybody in her life that is trying to defend that pos as well. Plus I have a strong suspicion that it would not stop there. He would probably start physically abusing both the mother and child.

@seekeroftruth6728

11 ай бұрын

​@@wildstorm3486The guy doesn't want his wife to turn into a fat slob, so he's automatically going to start physically abusing her AND the baby? Wow. You need a good therapist.

@fayeslover

11 ай бұрын

She needs to throw the whole dude away. And her mom too.

@morgandouglas6014

11 ай бұрын

I agree. When the man who is supposed to love you does something like what the husband did, there’s no coming back from it. That’s automatic grounds for divorce, and everyone defending him deserves to be banished from OP’s life. He should also be made to pay for the food he destroyed in front of OP.

@icedevil3795

11 ай бұрын

Remember, they'll punch things around you before they hit you.

Story 1: Divorce isn't enough, I need that ex-husband expunged from this mortal coil.

@ninjabluefyre3815

11 ай бұрын

Banish him to the shadow realm.

@wildstorm3486

11 ай бұрын

Damn right his free subscription to breathing should be revoked.

@Caldera_Scarab

11 ай бұрын

Sacrifice him to ensure good harvest.

@jaczylijaaleniepowiemkto3243

4 ай бұрын

​@@Caldera_Scarab Or better yet, an abundant supply of milk.

Man, that second story was absolutely SOUL-crushing. I don’t see any hope in OP salvaging the relationship with his wife, and it sucks that if he goes through with the divorce, he’ll only suffer more for it. I do hope OP is able to rebuild the bond with his children. I agree that they’re probably being conditioned to treat OP horribly (and future partners) through their mother’s example. Whatever happens, I PRAY OP does not “passionately hug” this witch.

Second story: "she told me she took the girls for a spa day... she said they already ate at my favourite restaurant" The wife didn't forget Father's day, that is deliberate. She just so happened to take away his children on the day where it's supposed to be about the bond between him his children and then rubs salt in the wound by going to his favourite restaurant without him. You hit the nail on the head when you said she's trying to sabotage OPs relationship with his children.

@Clairski3

11 ай бұрын

Exactly. I thought this too. This is no accident - it’s deliberate neglect and sabotage.

@dragonriderabens9761

11 ай бұрын

That is suspicious as hell as well, but the signs of abuse are so few and far between in this post that IDK if I can really say it was on purpose or if the wife was really just that oblivious I wouldn't be shocked at all if there was a long string of this type of thing going back years that made in more obvious it was on purpose But the thing that keeps me from believing it's really on purpose is that the wife is actually taking steps to fix it instead of just dipping it could be she's doing a really good job of keeping the mask on or she's just really that oblivious. most abusers would have the mask off when it came time to pick between separation and setting a therapy appointment. regardless, that's one hell of a red flag for sure

@dinlupus3196

11 ай бұрын

i hope he divorce her , and lets see how the kids threat him once they see witch one of their parents tries to spend time with them and witch one just keep bad mouthing the other

@RealCoolstriker64

11 ай бұрын

@@dragonriderabens9761except we don’t know that yet. Right now, all she’s done is *say* she scheduled those things, and *say* she wanted sex. Also, you forget that in this situation, the potential abuser is financially dependent on their victim. If OP walks, he’s taking his wallet with him. Even if she *does* get alimony, that’s gonna take a LOT more work to get a lot less than she’s getting now, when all she (potentially) thinks she has to do is “go to a shrink for a couple months and hug him passionately a few times” to get him back in his place. Although you are right that there isn’t enough here to confirm either way… yet.

@DragonbornMike-ym2er

11 ай бұрын

Honestly if I were in OPs shoes I'd probably hope it was deliberate. Cause at least you know she/they don't like you. But the "no we really do love you" crap is just so much worse. Like they "love" OP but this is his experience? Yikes.

OP's in both stories need to cut their toxic partners out of their lives. They both played their hands and have shown exactly who they really are.

@kaykay8855

11 ай бұрын

The op in the first post is divorcing her husband, but knowing him and since her brother is on his side, he will definitely drag it out. The op in the second post is taking steps towards separation/divorce, but like most people he wants to ensure that it doesn’t effect his relationship with his kids.

As a mom who lost nearly all my teeth after my pregnancy, I can attest to how VERY important it is to have what your body craves both during and after pregnancy. What a horrible situation to be in. My heart just breaks for her.

@MalloriaAnn

11 ай бұрын

I never knew that before. I'm sorry you went through that. My one ex would call me fat (since my new medication caused me to gain weight and I NEEDED those meds unfortunately) and whenever i said i was in pain or exhausted he called me lazy and worthless... turns out i had Fibromyalgia and I never went to see a doctor for years because he convinced me that the obvious warning signs were just me being a "bad" person, lazy, unmotivated, slob who constantly napped when I was clearly suffering the entire time and I feel SO MUCH BETTER now that i'm without him and in a healthy relationship where my partner will literally carry me to bed when i'm in too much pain to walk. My heart broke for her but unfortunately men like that don't change and she has to divorce.

@feroxsayshello518

11 ай бұрын

My daughter's father is taking her and moving out in a few days and I was treated like that and abused by him and my paternal family and I am so devastated and the things I hear in these stories are the only thing keeping me from being totally alone

@feroxsayshello518

11 ай бұрын

He always says I'm lazy and I need to get over things. I actually have severe PTSD to the degree of disability. And he caused it to get worse. Lazy indeed... people need to meet reality. Doesn't mean it gets better, unfortunately. People like that don't come from a logical place or feel bad about anything. They don't even feel responsible for the damage. And it is never done for a reason. All I want to understand is why I have to lose everything when I was not doing anything wrong. But still, here I am, losing because I didn't know who he was in time to save myself.

@MalloriaAnn

11 ай бұрын

@feroxsayshello518 Is there a court order granting him custody? Because if not then he can't just take your daughter and leave that would be kidnapping. Tell him you will call the police if he tries to take her. Or take her first to a family members house/somewhere safe. You don't have to let him take everything from you! It can be hard but if you're able to then you have to fight him on this.

@melissylum4106

11 ай бұрын

@@MalloriaAnn I'm sure it varies state to state, but without an existing custody order, there can't be a kidnapping by a parent. It's really frustrating. But, she would need to apply for full custody and a protective order for both of them against her husband. It would be temporarily granted while awaiting a hearing where he could defend himself. But, with that temporary order, she could request police collect her kid. Sadly, in my experience, police aren't always willing to take action, even when a protective order has been put in place. Hopefully it's better where she is!

"I'm sorry for making you feel that way" is basically the same as "I'm sorry you felt that way". This means the wife isn't genuine with the apology and is trying to justify her behavior somehow.

@deepseagargantuar1373

11 ай бұрын

you know it's gonna be a good day when dracko comments

@bonniehalf-elven

11 ай бұрын

aka, the "unpology."

@grobanite4ever85

11 ай бұрын

Coming out of the narcissist handbook. This is gaslighting

@dudeorduuude5211

11 ай бұрын

She is so checked out, she doesn't even know it.

@buzzsawwyrm1595

11 ай бұрын

@@bonniehalf-elvenI’m reading that in the Lego worlds narrator voice

First story: in other words, the husband is killing his child because the mother of his kid needs to eat FOR TWO.

@hipsterracoon2159

11 ай бұрын

Good eye!!!

@nationalinstituteofcheese3012

11 ай бұрын

I’m sure she can claim child abuse and child endangerment in the divorce

First Story: Uhhhh, OP's husband is being a selfish prick and is showing what really matters to him about OP: her appearance. OP literally just had their first kid and all he is worried about is OP possibly getting fat? The fact that everyone is defending this man and not OP is baffling to me. Crazy how he "apologized", tried to excuse his insults as "being honest", and then doubles down by calling OP a meat cow because OP's milk is low and she can’t get THEIR child to stop crying. OP's husband is a joke of a husband and even more a joke of a father. Second Story: Honestly, this is a situation where I’d be a bit understanding if OP left his family. OP is being consistently treated like he is nothing by his wife and his own kids. I bet that the second OP leaves and they're on their own for anything and everything, they will all change their tune and pretend to care about and appreciate OP. I think OP should divorce his wife and find someone who will actually love him and appreciate him. Obviously OP's wife wants to make things work because she chose therapy but there is a long way to go before things are good. What bothers me is her constantly apologizing thinking that it will help

@xKCAZxLEADER

11 ай бұрын

@@tomcarey4442bro shut up 🙄

@thetruth1816

11 ай бұрын

​@@tomcarey4442your post: more MID..

@hiroshi7025

11 ай бұрын

​@@tomcarey4442Your entire existence : Durex' oopsie.

@juanvilas8509

11 ай бұрын

Plus he might be a violent ahole in the future, man that act like that are a really big red flag because psychological abuse than go to physical abuse to OP or her daughter.

@dracko158

11 ай бұрын

The fact that her OWN MOTHER is demanding OP to apologize to him. Like, apologize for what? Apologize for being pregnant? Are you trying to ruin your relationship with your own daughter, and also by extension, you and the granddaughter's relationship?

Story 2: Man, I can't imagine having such a great father like OP and just…ignoring him and pretending he and his special days don't exist. I can't imagine treating MY OWN dad like that, my dad practically guided me through many responsibilities of an adult, like my own car and credit card. Honestly, if this whole situation does happen to be because the wife secretly hates OP and it's rubbing off on the kids, OP needs to get proof of it, divorce the wife, get full custody, and then get the kids in therapy, because I don't think the kids would maintain any relationships with their future lovers with this attitude.

@kathvg

4 ай бұрын

Yeah, OP could possibly get his at-fault divorce due to parental alienation

@brassbuckles

Ай бұрын

My take on it is that there are issues in that relationship that we're not seeing because we're only getting OP's take on things, and of course he's going to try to make himself look good. The wife's overall behavior, like skipping his birthday and Father's Day, seem pretty clear signals to OP that she's unhappy about their relationship. Why, I don't know. What she expected to happen as a result, I also don't know. But for it to get to that point, they both made mistakes, first among which is the failure to communicate.

OP from story 1 needs to leave ASAP. For her own sake and that of her daughter. That man is abusive and garbage human being

@lancerevell5979

11 ай бұрын

And, he is a definite danger to both OP and her baby.

I would toss out literally everything this guy owns. like, straight into the dumpster.

@cecejamesable

11 ай бұрын

I'd leave all his crap out in the rain.

@chriscarpenter3370

11 ай бұрын

​@@cecejamesablegood idea in case the dumpster is full.

@Iflie

11 ай бұрын

Yeah I don't know what culture that is but in what world is feeding your breastfeeding wife not a priority? And the family agrees with him? Nuts. And she leaves with the baby not him. "I don't care if the baby starves as long as you are slim and sexy for me!" That's not something any woman in the past would put up with either.

@scmontgomery

11 ай бұрын

I'd light it on fire in the parking lot of his place of employment

@Juzokinnie

11 ай бұрын

And the guy out too.

That last story was gut wrenching, and there is probably like a 65% chance that the wife is cheating in some form, I have watched to many relationship stories, and her behavior is raising a ton of red flags, the dead bedroom, and the general indifference/disregard towards the OP's feelings being the major ones, and if she isn't cheating then she is just a garbage person.

@anthonymedina9425

11 ай бұрын

This is the only story, where i hope she was cheating. Only so that he can divorce her without losing anything

@DragonbornMike-ym2er

11 ай бұрын

​@@anthonymedina9425Sad but way too true man.

@wingracer1614

2 ай бұрын

He really should have hired a PI or done some digging on his own before the blow up. Now it's entirely possible she cut things off with the affair partner in an attempt to salvage their relationship making it much harder to get that evidence.

Story 2. The spa trip feels intentional. Like she specifically decided to snub him and leave him alone on Father's Day. I don't care how consumed you are in your day to day stuff, it's going to be brought to your attention that this holiday is coming up just by walking into a grocery store or going to a retail site like Amazon. And she went out of her way to show her daughters how little she feels they to be concerned with their father's wants and needs because she thinks he has no sense of self. I can't fault the kids too much because she is training and enforcing them to disregard him this way.

Food wastage alone should be a crime and everything else provides the foundation. Oh, she shed some pounds. About one ex-husband's worth of weight

@maris7457

11 ай бұрын

that's what i was going to say too. ignoring how f'ing abusive this is - f them for wasting food! garbage person

The first story: SHE'S NOT EVEN FAT WHAT THE HECK??? 5ft 7inches and 150lbs is NOT FREAKING FAT. And even if she WAS fat, it doesn't matter!! She was just pregnant! People gain weight during pregnancy! Plus she's still the woman this man "supposedly" fell in love with. This poor woman. I hope hope HOPE she stays safe

@rileymcgowan6490

10 ай бұрын

No cuz I’m the same height as her and weigh 150 normally. I was shocked when they said that was fat lol.

@LilacMorelli

5 ай бұрын

Yeah ngl 121 pounds is a bit on the skinny side. I’m 5ft 6 and 125 and I’m stick thin, she also said she works out a lot so likely has muscles.

@rayusremy

3 ай бұрын

I don't know if that man knows but 150 is literally the number you wanna be when you're 5'7 lmaoooo

Since the wife is clearly a narcissist there's no way she's going to maintain this front forever because realistically a narcissist is incapable of being selfless indefinitely

@Sus_pumpkin

11 ай бұрын

Better not be talking about the first story

@madambutterfly1997

11 ай бұрын

@@Sus_pumpkin I was talking about the Second Story

@MalloriaAnn

11 ай бұрын

We dont know shes a narcissist. She might be acting selfish or being narcissistic but that in no way makes her a narcissist. Especially since they cannot hide it well and OP managed to fall in love with and marry a completely different woman... my ex was a narcissist and love bombing does NOT last that long nor was it possible for him to hide his behavior for even a year. He was very manipulative and could trick you into thinking he changed but he had to do that quickly to trap you since the mask would drop quickly. I highly doubt she is actually a narcissist. It's totally possible to be a bad person without having some mental disorder and we as a society have to stop arm chair diagnosing people. Not only is it harmful to those suffering from mental illness but it's just taking away responsibility from the bad party like the wife here. She does not have a disorder she's just a human being and humans act sh*tty all the time for other reasons. We have NO idea what caused this behavior. She might be depressed or miserable in her life and this is the unfortunate side effect, she might have simply taken him for granted and could genuinely change when she realizes that she will lose him for good.

@MalloriaAnn

11 ай бұрын

​@@Sus_pumpkinlmao why on Earth would you even comment that... like why would you ever think they were talking about the first story? Lol.

@dyamariv3628

11 ай бұрын

@@MalloriaAnn Sounds like you're defending this abusive woman. SMH

Story 2, the kids were probably following the mother's lead. She might be bad-mouthing him to the kids, but it could also be that they notice how she treats him and are doing the same. In my experience, it's easy for kids to kind of gang up and bully a single member of the family if they're shown it's okay.

Who actually believes the wife in Story 2 isn't cheating? OP is the provider and no one wants to be labeled a cheater, OP said when he asked his wife she looked like 'she'd just been slapped', I bet it was more like 'oh shit, does he know? I don't wanna lose my meal ticket!'. We'll get another update in maybe 6 months to a year where the wife finally cracks and admits she's a cheater and doesn't want to save the marriage. Also gonna bet at least the 17 year old already knew and has been covering from her mom. :(

@RobDaCajun

11 ай бұрын

Yeah, she definitely dipped out and been getting it someplace else. It all sounds like she replaced him with other men a long time ago.

@ShadowTaipan

11 ай бұрын

That was my immediate thought.

@dragonriderabens9761

11 ай бұрын

Everyone regarding this specific comment has total reddit brain not every time a woman stops loving a man is it the result of cheating y'all probably think a woman and a man can't have a platonic friendship either

@akl2k7

11 ай бұрын

Yeah, it kind of sucks when you know they were most likely cheating but you have no evidence. The fact that she's going many months without any couple's fun time shows that she's potentially getting some from someone else, and because of her comment about birthday intimacy, it makes me think she doesn't find her husband attractive anymore.

@RobDaCajun

11 ай бұрын

@@akl2k7 if she is ducking another man. Then in her mind she’s “cheating” on her AP sleeping with her husband. In any case she’s just giving the absolute bare minimum to keep the gravy train going. It would have been better for him to stay quite, hire a PI, talk to an attorney and find out how deep the rabbit hole goes. Before confrontation has been done. Now everyone is on alert. Let’s say she’s not cheating, and has become complacent as all hell. The money spent on a PI is still well paid. At least for the peace of mind there is something to be salvaged.

As someone who hates the internet’s automatic response of divorce/leave to every problem, OP in story 1 needs to RUN as fast as possible. That is terrifying behavior.

@wingracer1614

2 ай бұрын

The most terrifying thing is she gave him a second chance.

I'm 34 weeks pregnant, and I've been spending the past couple of weeks in the hospital due to pregnancy complications. If my husband ever treated me like OP in story 1, I would divorce immediately, with a RO, and would not allow him to see the baby. Poor OP, not everybody is lucky like me with having a sweet and supportive husband.

@hipsterracoon2159

11 ай бұрын

Yep, and restraining order applies to everybody at the side of his and her family who defends the pig. I bet he’s no beauty King either… what a disgusting waste of space of man

@chriscarpenter3370

11 ай бұрын

congrats! Hopefully everything goes well. also is it a boy or girl?

@seekeroftruth6728

11 ай бұрын

Nobody should put up with abuse, but you seem all too ready to sacrifice your child's future for the sake of your emotions. Not to mention how difficult it is for single mothers to date. Good luck finding a good man if you leave.

@hipsterracoon2159

11 ай бұрын

⁠​⁠​⁠@@seekeroftruth6728 give me a break ….the husband in the story, was the one who almost damaged the child’s life… why should OP stay with him? And let him put her down and probably in the future, the daughter down she will show that it’s okay to stay in a relationship where person doesn’t respect you …She would do so much better as a single parent done, dealing with a dumbass ape…🙄 just because you produce the child doesn’t make you a parent Conan Gray sings about it…

@Milk-ck1wv

11 ай бұрын

​@@seekeroftruth6728are you saying she should stay with a disrespectful man is he hypothetical is because its hard to be a dating single mother? Ruin her child? The child would be ruined if the kid stays in a household with people that don't love eachother

Story 1: OPs 'husband' is a complete POS and the people who were defending him, I'm glad that a divorce is in the works. Story 2: I hope that OP updates if things turn out better

Jesus Christ the abuse from OPs husband is horrendous, and what makes it worse? Her mother and brother was green-lighting that abuse. The screaming, starving her, punching holes in walls, and his abuse was supported whilst she was exhausted and collapsing. Jesus Christ is actually saddens and angers me how much his abuse was excused and OP was expected to just deal with the abuse,

man both of the stories are soo heartbreaking like first imagine being gaslighted not just by your family but your in-laws and partner too than comes the fatshaming on the second imagine giving your all to a family you love only to be used like an ATM and ignore after that to the point when you point out their mistreatment towards you they don't even realise the gravity of the situation

who would have thought that not only op 1s husband and his family were evil but her own family are just as evil for supporting this abusive behavior. it makes me curious that not only has her ex been abusing her throughout their marriage but if her own family abused her when growing up to the point she got conditioned to see that behavior as normal until that behavior resulted in violence from her spouse

@susangrande8142

11 ай бұрын

That’s a good point that OP didn’t recognize her own family’s treatment of her as toxic too, and why. THEY conditioned her to not recognize it. ☹️

@twistysunshine

11 ай бұрын

I totally agree bc her husband said "im just being truthful" and she was like wow I guess he's right. It seems like she's very easily manipulated, and it must start somewhere

@abiean222

11 ай бұрын

i'm glad she's starting to awaken to the truth, but i'm sad that it took so long to happen. at least it happened before such abuse can fall onto her daughter.

@spydersoup8447

11 ай бұрын

Makes me wonder if OP's mother was one of those wives who aims to please her husband and do as he tells her to do, like she's his faithful servant and wants OP to be the same as her. If so, this worries me. I'm also guessing OP never saw any of the flags from her mother until here because until she suffers from her health problems and her husband became abusive, any abusive and red flags her family gives out is completely normal to her.

@susangrande8142

11 ай бұрын

@@spydersoup8447 who knows? We only get a very small version of whatever happened in these stories. Our imaginations fill in the rest.

I’m pretty sure OP 1 dumping her husband is more than enough dropping weight

@Keiranhalycon

11 ай бұрын

Good way to lose a couple hundred pounds of garbage.

Jesus, double whammy today. Both stories were so depressing, I hope both OPs find happiness

Story 1: bro, if my mother and MIL said I needed to lose weight and apologize because I got reasonably upset that my husband threw my food out and called me a fucking cow, neither of us would have mothers and his sister would be down one sibling.

OP's family is absolutely terrifying. If my sister was breastfeeding and called me up to tell me her husband threw a tantrum over food, that bastard would be lucky to have all his teeth in his head and a straight nose on his face. OP's brother's reaction honestly makes me worried for her sister in law, if she has one.

Story 1: My mom had a tooth fall out after she gave birth to my sister. Breastfeeding takes a lot of energy and, yes, calories.

The 2nd story breaks my heart. I would do anything for a parent who cared as much as him. A dad who wanted to do things with me and came to all my stuff.

How can someone talk like that to newly mother. Its disgusting

@juliaboskamp9666

11 ай бұрын

This is what we usually see in man with a tendency of abuse usually when they feel like you are trapped with them they show ther true colors This is usaly after a milstone like: -the wedding or marriage -moving in together - 1st pregnancy -the arrival of a baby or a few days afterwards

@goblinwisdom

11 ай бұрын

An old friend had a c section the father expected them to do everything 12 hrs after getting out of hospital, cooking cleaning, everything.

@abiean222

11 ай бұрын

people who do things like that don't see women as human beings, they view women as akin to androids that they get to fuck.

Story 1; wow that guy is probably the worst person I have ever heard so far on this channel! He is not only denying his wife food, but his very young daughter who can't even hold her own head up, let alone eat solid foods! My dad was the complete opposite of this 'guy' if you want to call him that. He was helping my mom and myself in the hospital after I was born through a C-section. My mom literally told all the nurses and security that he temporarily banned from seeing me or my mom, and that he needed to take a day off cause he was exhausted and could use a shower (he was working for a garbage company at time, and these are his words not mine). The fact that this 'man' would throw out food TWICE and insults his wife after everything she has gone through! She should be treated like the queen she is!

My old dog would do the same. He was a rescue, so to be honest we put it down to that and he'd occasionally get a second meal because he convinced us well enough, so we resulted to either notes on his bowl saying he'd been fed or we would text each other lol. He was always a healthy weight, he just had a lot of behaviours from his time as a stray that we couldn't train or if him. Also, holy fuck on that first story really does deserve immediate divorce. OP may want to find a support group for abuse. Any abuse is abuse, even if it seems like less than others. And jesus that last post is just sad. The kids didn't know something was going on. And it seems really manipulative of how she's been treating OP. Props to OP for finding support for himself.

"Every box, bag, and package" Oh hey, that was almost the "it came without packages, boxes, or bags" line from how the grinch stole Christmas.

The last story: the wife is using every tactic in the ho bag handbook. I'd be very surprised if she isn't cheating

Men and women in a married relationship should always support each other. Also, Rslash… I hope your daughter grows up to be a wonderful young lady and I hope that she has an auspicious and healthy life.

Story 1: jesus!!! I am so upset that OP gave her husband a second chance. But it seems like the rest of her family are assholes too, so no wonder she has a warped sense of what is acceptable and unacceptable. I hope she gets through this okay.

Looks like the husband in the first story thought it was safe for him to reveal his true self now that there was a baby tying OP to him.

As someone who was ignored by my family and even some of my friends I felt for op in the 2nd story It hurts especially when people blame you for speaking out.

@RealCoolstriker64

11 ай бұрын

I’m sorry you went through that.

I'm the same height as op in the first story. And 150, the weight she was after pregnancy. Is my goal weight. Obviously, it doesn't matter if op is overweight, even if she wasn't literally sustaining another life. His reaction would be digusting regardless. But 121 at 5'7 sounds extremely underweight.

@NEPAAlchey

11 ай бұрын

Female normal BMI is 18.5 - 24.9. 121lbs is a 19 BMI, 150lbs is 23.5. She was definitely close to underweight but if she was exercising 4-5 times a day that's to be expected. Her current weight is probably not as well distributed since she hasn't exercised and loss muscle mass.

@katherinezimmerman6997

11 ай бұрын

@@NEPAAlchey You try exercising after having major abdominal surgery. I had a c-section last year and couldn’t even walk for a solid week, let alone exercise.

@silverselkie1692

9 ай бұрын

​@NEPAAlchey so it seems like she never really left the healthy bmi range, but still, the father expecting for his wife to stay on the incredibly low end of bmi after carrying a child and still having to consume enough calories for a second life, is quite frankly ridiculous.

Considering OP 1 was underweight before her pregnancy, I can probably assume her miscarriages may have something to do with her undernutrished frame. Now that this lady is medically a healthy weight her eating disorder enabling husband is literally throwing food out and smashing with his feet because he doesn't have an anorexic wife. Even if she was fat as she is (she isn't). His behaviour would still be disgusting. The fact that's she at a healthy weight just makes me think, does he want his baby to die from malnutrition?

@maxismyname5529

11 ай бұрын

THANK YOU SO MUCH, I’m surprised no one noticed how much this screams ED and over exercising. She doesn’t sound like she’s trying to gain strength but keep herself near underweight- and her mother feels like the start of that

Story 1: Oh please OP, run. Run fast and far. This man is an absolute monster. Cut off the family who sided with him as well. That man is not a husband or father. He's just an abuser.

@kaykay8855

11 ай бұрын

In the update, she is but knowing him he will drag it out.

The best story in this whole thing is your daughter yelling out “Daddy!” and running toward you! Sounds like you’re really enjoying being a dad!

*First OP:* Where does OP's soon-to-be ex live? My friends and I just want to talk. I'm glad OP and her baby are safe at OP's friend's place.

@Ironraven001

11 ай бұрын

Yeah. We just wanna chat real quick. Me and my friend Led Pighp.

The second story I can honestly relate to, my wife rarely even talks to me but my boys do spend time with me. Me and my wife have finally talked and I told her how she made me feel, she thought I prioritized my job over her, I told her that I do my job so she doesn't have to work and she can spend time on her hobbies and her health. I have came off the road (I'm a trucker) and when I do that she seems more distant and yells cause there is no money coming in like she is used to. When I come home I try to spend time with her after the kids go to bed but she would rather watch her show and not even talk to me. Recently she said I was trying to avoid her (I got COVID and was quarantined in my truck to not get them sick) after my quarantine was up I came in the house and she started yelling at me for not being home. I told her fine she thinks I'm trying to avoid her and the kids who I call everyday and try to spend time with I'll just head out. I walked back to my truck and was getting ready to leave out when she realized I wasn't playing. She has been now doing therapy and working on communicating with me for more than just how long are you home. So to the second story, if OP truly wants it to work have his wife show she means it not just set up the appts but put effort into the marriage

OP in the second story deserves so much better than what he got. My god that's so tragic.

"I'm sorry you feel that way." = I refuse to acknowledge how my actions have affected the relationship to the point that your emotional state has begun to deteriorate.

Story 1: yep dudes trash, you have kids it’s time to grow up and man up to be a husband and a dad. I have a daughter, it was a complicated birth. I almost lost my wife and daughter. For a year my wife could barely breastfeed our daughter. Every else was up to me, cleaning, cooking, changing, for both of them (everyone knows both mom and baby get diapers after surgery 😂) I could only get limited time off work so back full time after 3 weeks. It was basically the most challenging thing I’ve done so far. But even at my most tired and exhausted point, never did I ever think of calling my wife names or fat or taking away food. What the actual fuck. Sometimes I wonder why I listen to this show, it just makes my blood pressure rise 😂 but for all those dads out there who manned up and got it done here’s a “fist bump” for ya!

First story: If he is starving her and punching holes in walls, it is not safe to be with him.

On RSlashs story, I give Rslash 1/5 for not being a good dog daddy, and Yugo gets 3/5 for manipulating and gaslighting his dad. 😂😂😂

@silverselkie1692

11 ай бұрын

Yugo gets 0/5 because he is 5/5 good boy

O.O story one was scary as hell. The lengths he went to to starve his breastfeeding wife, punching a hole in a door and throwing shit at her because she secretly had her friend replace what HE threw away. Calling his wife a meat cow when the starvation starts to cause health problems forcher AND the baby... he even turned around and told his mommy on her. Just wtf to all of this. He single forever, honestly.

I feel terribly for the man in the second story. Yes, it is super weird the kids wouldn't remember his birthday or Father's Day. I wonder if the family is device-dependent and checked out? Sounds like he is handling everything very maturely. They needed to see what it was like with him away.

First story: The fact that op’s mom isn’t on her side makes me question if there aren’t some really important details missing from this story. It’s either that, or op’s mom is worse that the husband

@drwboy07

11 ай бұрын

Yeah I think there's a huge chunk missing or the story is a really bad fanfic. The whole thing of her family not taking her side is what I'm questioning as well not even her brother has her back.

@ams197610

11 ай бұрын

There are families who are abusive as well that tell the women it's their job to keep the husband happy and do what he says. If she grew up in that environment, it's how she ended up married to him and did not recognize red flags in the first place.

@jeremiahsmith2037

11 ай бұрын

@@ams197610 that’s why I was careful with my wording. I could have said op was was flat out lying, but I didn’t. That’s also why I said that if it is true, then the mom is a horrible person.

@existentialpyro99

8 ай бұрын

@@jeremiahsmith2037hmm... might wanna check OP 1’s comments and replies on her post. It may not be the case for others, but for me, it seems like her family may not have been all that good and that may partially explain why she ended up with a husband like that. It also doesn’t help I had close relatives who had to cut themselves off from their own family and their spouse + in laws because of similar incidents like this. But eh, I could be wrong and this could be all a badly written fan fiction story. Which, tbh, would be a better alternative than it being real and a person out there suffering from this (which sadly is likely the case at this point 😬😞)

The Hugo gaslighting story is the cutest thing I’ve ever heard

@austinclements8010

11 ай бұрын

dogs are master emotional manipulators- owning 2, i should know xD

@akl2k7

11 ай бұрын

​@@austinclements8010Them and cats. Pets in general know how to push the right buttons.

4:00 "Isn't honesty the most important foundation of a happy and healthy relationship?" As Benoit Blanc once so eloquently put it, "It's a dangerous thing to mistake speaking without thought for speaking the truth."

Thank you for the comment about your daughter, that really brightened my day. I really like kids and am currently working at preschool and I feel very loved when someone accidentally calls me mom

7:02 as a cat owner i can confirm that cats are also experts at gaslighting

@BronzeDragon133

11 ай бұрын

I care for three dogs and two stray cats. They're ALL experts at gaslighting.

@vickymc9695

11 ай бұрын

Even my rabbit tries it with me and my carer.

About the second story: I find it interesting that the 11-year-old daughter was sad/surprised that OP wasn’t coming home with them after the initial meeting between OP and his wife/kids after leaving, considering she (the daughter) participated in the perpetual ignoring of the OP that led to this breakdown. However, I do think that this all stems from the mother (OP’s wife), and she has some major issues she needs to work through. So yeah…option B of RSlash’s is looking a lot more likely, and the fact that she is only working on it now after facing the consequences of her actions? Therapy may work in this case, but the OP does have a case for her being at fault in this relationship, so if he needs to go scorched earth with her, then that’s what needs to happen.

If I was OP's brother from that first story I'd have show up at his house calling him the sorriest excuse of a man I've ever seen in my life and to thank whatever god he prays to that I'm not abusive like him otherwise I'd be beating the snot out of him for what he did to my sister.

Of course things aren't the same without their atm and taxi service. Now they miss you, but not when they leave you for a spa day.

"My dog started gaslighting me" is the best thing I've ever heard 😂😂😂

Last bit of the video talking about your little girl running to give you a hug hits home with me. My daughter, who will be 3 in a few months, does this most days when I get home from work and it's the best part of my day.

It's sad that OPs husband did that but I'm not surprised. It was most like happening before the pregnancy but more subtle. This definitely didn't come out of nowhere. DV gets worse during and after pregnancy ( I guess not during in this case?) because they think that is when the other person is less likely to leave. I have no doubt he would end up hitting her if he punches doors. Good on OP for leaving, that's a tough thing to do. Being a single mom is gonna be worth her life, sanity, and her baby's future.

I agree with Rlash on the last story. I don't think there is any hope. I might be projecting from my first marriage, but I can't imagine that someone who forgets a birthday and a Father's Day so fully is the kind of person that loves OP in any way. I mean--how do you forget Father's Day? It's everywhere!

😂 We had to install a little sign system for our pup to let everyone else know if she already had breakfast or not because she'd do the same dramatic act to get more food. I know the pain, Dabney!

I would have responded "yes I do need to lose weight some dead weight" before throwing the ring at him

Somehow my dogs have managed to get their dinner time moved up by like 2hrs. They’re seniors now and decided they need early dinner, then regular dinner. 😂

I listen to rslash as soon as I get to work. I’m a morning maintenance guy at a restaurant. I enjoy listening to the stories as I’m doing my morning duties.

The first story pisses me off. I was 135 when I got pregnant and I was 198 after my pregnancy and while that’s a bit more than expected, my husband still was supportive and loved me. I’m sorry op. Your husband is a POS

Story 2: TW: abuse, parental alienation. Coming from a family with a working father and an SHM, we have always been closer to our mother. Our father works a lot so he is away most of the time and our parents' relationship has always been very rough. They abuse each other both mentally and physically, and it has caused so much trauma and mental illness for us. From a young age, we started hearing more from our mother's side since she was always by our side. She complained and blamed him for everything, and we were there to hear about it every day, so it made us view him as the bad guy (it's called Parental Alienation), and my mother as the victim. No matter how hard he worked to provide for us, we only approached him if it was necessary. We were scared of him most of the time since we were afraid he would act out on us, so we tried to limit our interactions (but also because my mother always told us to stay away from him). Now we are older, we start realizing that both parents are equally abusive and scary to each other, but they are generally good with us. We tried to connect more with our father, but it looks like he prefers being alone. He does want to be with us, but I think he is tired and stressed, so we try our best to care for him whenever we can. We want to slowly get to know him again, but it's hard since parts of us are still scared of him. So my point is, perhaps the mother is doing parental alienation on the children. I hope OP can talk with his children to figure out their behaviour towards him.

The wife is the scapegoat of her envious narcissist mother which is why she's ended up marrying a narcissist. Divorce is the only cure for narcissistic abuse.

6:40 Same here Dabney. My cat Leo is a slow eater, so he'll come up to me begging for food and trying to eat MY food, when he has plenty of food in his bowl.

That second story is heartbreaking. I wish there was more to the update, something more definitive. There's a lot of people calling the wife a narcissist, which could definitely be the case, but I've seen a lot of relationships like this where the spouse is more negligent of the relationship than outright abusive and OP doesn't really give much evidence either way, and im really curious to know the outcome of the therapy sessions. Either way, I hope OP finds happiness. Dude definitely deserves it.

The first story is so appalling and worrying, get out of there OP 😬 The second story just tore my heart out. I can’t imagine treating my dad or even my mom’s boyfriend like that - my mom and her bf have been together for like 15 years and I consider him to be a second dad. My dad’s not perfect of course and we struggled growing up but I still love him and appreciate how hard he worked for us all throughout my childhood and college. My mom’s bf has three kids by his ex who turned extremely toxic and poisoned the kids against him, all with similar age ranges to OP’s. The courts made him stop visitation for HIS sake because the kids were treating him so terribly. I always make sure to wish them happy birthday and Father’s day, spend time with them when we’re not busy for once, and get them nice, thoughtful gifts now that I actually have money to spoil them with. I’m glad that even though things didn’t work out between my parents, they didn’t keep us from each other and kept any bad talk to a minimum. This story just makes me want to hug my dads.

Story 1: The husband probably "planned" when he'd become abusive. He waited until OP was emotionally invested in the marriage, tied to him through their kid, and postpartum because he knew it would be his best chance of being able to control OP. It's a good thing OP was stronger than the husband though, and she was able to get out. This pattern of behaviour is exactly how abusers work.

Second story... honestly, the story had reached unforgivable territory for me before the update. The wife, at least, I wouldn't be able to forgive. I'd also be very bitter at my kids if they only noticed me after I was gone.

@torturapesnorrarape

11 ай бұрын

100% a cheating wife, if she doesn't need attention from her husband she is getting it from somewhere else.

@RealCoolstriker64

11 ай бұрын

Oh yeah. You don’t just eat at your husband’s favorite restaurant on father’s day and not even think of him *once* at any point in the meal. Not even to ask if he wanted them to bring his favorite food.

the 2nd story before it's update is truly a show of entitlement, the family ignored OP because they had the perfect life in their eyes. But in situations like these, I think back to something I heard long ago, to quote here: "People do not miss the things they have, but they can not live without these things, so it is the same with human life's." I feel this quote fits well in this situation, before the husband left and showed them their true selves this family didn't miss their father, but without him they crumble, not being able to live without their provider. thank you for listening to my ted talk

Rslash I think you're right about OP's wife potentially doing parent alienation. My mother did this to our dad. We chose to not see him for almost a year but it wasn't really our choice. She manipulated us so much into thinking he was a bad person, we believed it. Pretty sure my sister still does. I went NC with my mother 3 years ago. Narcissists are dangerous.

For that first story…wow. Just wow. I feel so bad for the OP, and really think she needs to get away asap. How could her own mother of all people think she was in the wrong? She may have had some PP issues, but instead of the husband self diagnosing, he could have had a sensible conversation with his wife about how he’s worried about her weight but since this is his and her first child maybe they should consult their doctor to make sure everything is going as normal, and then go from there. That’s the obvious thing to do.

Our beagles would ask for food first from my husband and then from me to see if they could get two meals. We ended up making an "already fed" sign for the kibble container. Miss those silly pups!

Story 2 Oh, hun. That relationship was already dead. OP is trapped in a ghost town and is finally starting to realize the mannequins aren't real people. He needs _life,_ not.... whatever this monstrosity of deception he's had to endure.

Wow, just wow. As a trained counselor I'm very concerned for OP's safety in story 1. There are 2 very huge red flags for future physical domestic violence in her story: the lack of bonding between father and baby, and father punching a hole in the door. If the father had attempted to choke OP that would be the DV red flag trifecta. These are three of the five biggest red flags for future physical Domestic Violence in a home. I can't believe that her entire support system, except for her brother, are so sexist and trying to bully her into losing weight and apologize to someone who got violent, isn't helping her w/baby or around the house, and isn't bonding with his own baby. What in the heck did I just see/read? I feel like I just had a fever nightmare. I hope to god she sees a divorce attorney pronto and gets in touch with any friends/family who might actually not be sexist and unsafe. Edit due to update: Thank the f*ck she's divorcing his abusive a$$. I hope like hell she gets full custody.

Wtf is wrong with the ones not supporting op, like wtf, they deserve 4/5 at minimum, good job on your best friend

So, is anyone going to point out that in most "Fault" stats, having sex with your spouse is sign of you forgiving them? Like, if she cheated, but broke it off, and then had sex with her husband, she can claim that he forgave her and they were working on things. (Making the divorce not her fault anymore.)

@RandomAnagram.

11 ай бұрын

What a nasty shrew to do that on top of all the BS she does to OP. I hope the divorce lawyer he saw warned him about that.

The dad story, these feelings expressed feel very familiar. A natural response for anyone is to mentally cauterize extremely painful situations, especially from loved ones. She literally trained him to be okay with missing events he cared deeply in sharing, intentional, or not. Rslash's relationship points regarding what the children see are valid too. To this day, I can't initiate intimacy without something like alcohol to break down those walls, and I place zero priority on sex. I know it can be great, and I know that feeling of intimacy with someone you love is the greatest, but I can't even take off blinders when being hit on. Smh... Best of luck to that couple. Don't expect grandkids for a long, LONG time.

With the first story, that really hits me in such a way that I feel the betrayal. When my wife was pregnant the two with our boys I bent over backwards to help her even though I still feel like I could have done more for her. I am even sacrificing my sleep just to make sure she can get just an extra hour, and I do this because of how much I love her and how I appreciate everything she is doing and sacrificing for us. So the idea that a husband could be so cold and vile to the person he chose to marry and love, to demean her to the point that she thinks verbal/emotional/physical abuse is normal, it really sickens me and it feel betrayed. And the fact that everyone is siding with him makes it all worse. I have cut people out of my life permanently for less than that. I really hope OP gets into a much better place soon, being alone and having to raise a child is not easy.

Thank you rSlash for giving us news about Yugo 😃. It was so nice to hear about your pooch! Don’t ask yourself why your little pal is manipulative, he knows how much you love him, so he knows how to take advantage of it. Yugo is a very clever little fart!🤭😉👍❤️