Mothers who do not reflexively defend their children with the ferocity of a mother lion are absolute evil.

@notinkansas4885

6 ай бұрын

My sister is so much like this woman's mother and breaks my heart. My brother in law is in jail thankfully but it disgusts me the amount of people support her and she stood by a molester

@whitneyw.7919

6 ай бұрын

Actually, what is the most evil is that men sexually abuse children with impunity, I agree this woman is vile, But it’s just patriarchy talking that you think the true villain is always the woman not the men who do this type of thing And yes, I know maybe one percent of women have sexually abused someone so please know “what Abouts”

@Zumcho

6 ай бұрын

Absolutely 💯

@traetrae11

6 ай бұрын

Fully Agree!!

@user-zy9yg2eu5t

6 ай бұрын

​@@notinkansas4885 uh oh spagghettio sounds like you're the problem

Her mother is disgusting. She never got rid of that predator in order to protect her daughter. But I bet if her predator husband ends up on one of these predator-catching channels, she'd try to protect HIM. This young lady deserved better.

Parents not taking their kid’s side just so they can get sex and for their own issues is NOT uncommon, sadly.

@alluringbliss4165

6 ай бұрын

Not being alone too, refusing to leave the comfort. It’s unfortunate

@coconutwater4531

6 ай бұрын

Disgusting

@Jeremy-wp4yh

6 ай бұрын

Also financial compensation if he's the breadwinner

@avig8334

6 ай бұрын

Well said.

@lowkeyconvert8971

6 ай бұрын

i tend to think that it's less about the sex and romance side and more that the man is the breadwinner so therefore holds a modicum of power over his spouse. of course, there's nothing stopping a woman from working herself. i imagine back in the day, there would've been more barriers to women getting into the workplace and being able to make a decent living. some men know they've got the financial power and take advantage of the situation more, like this 'stepdad' did.

I hate the old “I’ll get counseling” line. Counseling isn’t like taking antibiotics. You can’t get “counseled” out of being a child predator.

@karenkelley2024

3 ай бұрын

💯 %

@ivankrushensky

Ай бұрын

100%. These people will never truly change no matter how much they pretend. For whatever reason, they're sexually attracted to children. Which isn't normal and is something messed up in the psyche.

I love when Delony goes into protective dad mode. It makes people feel so seen and heard. My heart goes out to this woman and I hope she finds some healing after being exposed to evil for so long. ❤️

@dabd8175

6 ай бұрын

Submit dog

@elizabethshannon1583

3 ай бұрын

He says the things we all needed to hear sometimes

@Mrs_Small

3 ай бұрын

Totally agree. It’s so validating.

@sdm1568

Ай бұрын

If it were a guy on the line, he would have said "now hold up, what happened to foster an environment to where your parents felt it was OK to diddle you? Real men set boundaries so man up!"

@dahliacheung6020

22 күн бұрын

Absolutely. Everything he said was so right and so important. As a survivor myself I'm so thankful that he uses his platform to speak into these sorts of issues that are so often hushed up in communities, causing children to grow up feeling violated, betrayed, and alone. NO MORE. Abuse must never be tolerated and this culture of protecting offenders should end with us.

Why people are so worried about sex predators boggles my mind. The sister is like "well he won't be alone with the kids". IS IT WORTH THE RISK??? And who wants to hang out with the weirdo sex predators anyway?

@fire12731

6 ай бұрын

Right?! Wtf ! You hear this a lot; where they care more about the offenders. And also school counselors are mandated reporters. They should have stepped in.

@the_review_lady_channel

6 ай бұрын

They are too cowardly and toxic to rock the boat and to tow a line of ethics.

@plamondonworks6948

2 ай бұрын

How could you even be intimate emotionally or sexually with a freak like this? That's what I'm wondering.

@Sam11747

Ай бұрын

It was briefly mentioned that he was using cameras to secretly record. It's quite possible he doesn't even need to be around kids to continue his abuse if he has access to a camera.

@emilyszymanski

7 күн бұрын

My husband’s family does this too. Even to the point where some of the family knows and some others with young kids do not. We do not associate with the whole family anymore, so much toxicity and the secret pedophile was just a symptom of the disfunction, and yet utterly devastating for the children he hurt

School officials, even counselors are mandated reporters they should have immediately called the cops they don’t need her permission to charge him the text was enough. He tried to sexually solicit a minor. The fact that any family member is still wanting to interact with him and welcome him back into the fold and act as if he didnt do what he did is absolutely disgusting and they don’t have a issue with that. They have no morals and theirs values are nonexistent.

@iloveallah3519

6 ай бұрын

Maybe they are like him

@theirishcailin333

6 ай бұрын

I know of a man that was jailed for abusing a young girl - she was around 13/14, was in my year at school but I never knew anything about it. She told me about a year ago and was shocked I hadn't heard. She told me that her abusers son who was also in our year at school, and his friends beat her younger brother because of what happened. The man plead guilty "to save her from going through a trial" and even him pleading guilty , his family still stood by him. It absolutely sickens me that he has access to his little grandchildren, who knows what he's doing! Worst thing is ,he lives just down the road from my friend. My abuser is dead but I left home and moved abroad at 21, couldn't be around any longer seeing him

@lwscijunkie

6 ай бұрын

I wish this kind of story wasn't as common as it is. Sickening. I pray for your recovery from what happened to you and your brother and that you both find joy for the rest of your lives.@@theirishcailin333

@SavannahSedai

4 ай бұрын

More than likely the school did exactly whatever their state requires of them. I know of a situation going on at this moment (in Arkansas) where multiple teachers have crossed every T and dotted every i for THREE SOLID YEARS over ONE student who is clearly being sexually abused by a step parent and for three years CPS has not one time even looked into the claim. The teachers and admin can only do so much before they lose their licenses so now they just consistently file their reports (I'm talking multiple reports a month) and do the BEST they can to show that child all the love and support the child needs at school. Going as far as to get him on the bus the earliest, after school activities, anything they can legally do to keep the child out of the home. We live in a messed up society.

@vaska1999

2 ай бұрын

​@@SavannahSedai It's strange that they weren't required to report it to the police, too.

When the mom asked if the predator could come to the service she was emotional hijacked. 100%

@celestegranell8766

6 ай бұрын

The mom asked her because he should be in jail. The fact she had to ask …. I feel so bad for this lady.

Lord this poor girl has been failed.

It's extremely frustrating how many mothers will make excuses for a man's illegal behavior against their kids.

@pamelaliegh

6 ай бұрын

Her kids, it is generally a step parent.

I will NEVER understand why women put men above protecting their own children! It’s VILE!! He belongs in prison! Her mom also abused her by failing to protect her! 😢

@pamelaliegh

6 ай бұрын

Men do the same . It’s called willful blindness.

Why did school officials not report to the police ?

@philwill0123

Ай бұрын

Depends on laws. I'm betting she didn't want to break up the family and authorities realised they couldn't pursue a case without evidence.

Right - she could not undress in that house or sit and not assume she would be filmed. Disgusting. What a _home._

@blueStarKitt7924

Ай бұрын

If we can call it a home.🤬😔

It sucks that she has to lose her family too. She was victimized twice.

@deannagillett2186

6 ай бұрын

That is a good word.

@Sam11747

Ай бұрын

She never had a family in my opinion.

I knew it... when the abuser was allowed to go to ONE family event, he took that as his "in" for ALL ONGOING family events... and it's like this poor lady's boundary never existed at all. DISGUSTING mother and family for sticking with him!!!

@philwill0123

Ай бұрын

Absolutely, because then mother can weaponise that. By saying "she had no issue with him attending, so obviously what she said she exaggerated because someone genuinely SAed wouldn't have him around, so she was lying"

The ultimate betrayal

Heathers family doesn’t serve such a precious gift as she is. Appalling. What her sisters are saying is truly unreal

What is wrong with the mom….? That is sick and perverted. How can you be attracted to and protect a creep how actively tried your daughter..?

The most common abuser of a child is a step parent. This man is a pile of garbage and that mother is more of a pile of garbage. It’s scary the women in her life that stand up for an abuser.

@abark

6 ай бұрын

No, the most common is a mother.

@leabeauty837

6 ай бұрын

@@abarktechnically this is true. However if you compare lone mothers vs lone fathers, that’s when the real statistics represent the more realistic figure “1,704 were killed by a mother acting alone. That represents only 0.12% of the1,452,099 children who are neglected by their mother alone. For fathers, who by themselves neglected 661,129 children, they killed 0.13% (859). So in terms of parents acting alone, fathers kill MORE children than mothers.” The figure you talk of are just the volumes, not taking into the fact the vast differences in men raising their kids vs the woman. Raising children alone (single fathers) vs the woman (single mothers) of course the latter is significantly higher so the numbers will be higher. However if you based it on percentages; if it was a 50/50 split of children in the care of each respective parent for example. Its the father

@abark

6 ай бұрын

@@leabeauty837 women perpetrate more domestic violence, more incestuous sexual abuse of children, more sexual abuse of children, and instigate more divorce. Not to mention more sexual exploitation of students!

@lowkeyconvert8971

6 ай бұрын

why would a single man want to marry a woman with children or "baggage"? i'm not saying all men think like this but it's probably to gain access to the woman's children. i get there there are brady bunch families where each spouse has children of their own from their earlier marriages and when they newly marry, it becomes a mixed family but it's a bit suss when the man has no children of his own and wants to look after another man's children.

@abark

6 ай бұрын

@@lowkeyconvert8971 why would a single mother want to marry a man who isn't the father of her children? Probably for access to his money.

John is right. Your family system is toxic beyond repair and will continue to destroy you by making you question if you were worth protecting (of course you were). Your mother chose a predator as a partner likely because of her own abuse history. She chose a man like that because covering for him and "caring" for him makes her feel in control in some delusional way, rather than to admit she was once vulnerable and abused herself. Some women have a bizarre sympathy for their abusers like a Stockholm syndrome. They are the same types to write prison inmates romantic letters. She may even feel that it is some form of justice for you to be abused like she was as it normalizes her own sense of brokenness or makes her feel less alone. She did not protect you and neither did your father, who was apparently so disconnected and absent that the stepfather sensed he could get away with that behavior. Please do not let these people harm you anymore. Concentrate on building a good life with your husband and children, and banish those cowards out of it.

@theirishcailin333

6 ай бұрын

I was abused as a child and not a chance would I stand up for a man like that!! Anyone like that shouldn't walk this earth. I'm highly protective of my children

@user-vs8tq2np2h

6 ай бұрын

Wow, you are so articulately right. I could never figured this flaw out in humanity until reading this

@philwill0123

Ай бұрын

Yep, some mothers are jealous of the attention their partners have in the abuse victims. Next it would be that she was aware of the cameras and performed for them. Those mothers are upset perverts are attracted to their kids than them.

@blueStarKitt7924

Ай бұрын

Right.❤

Just wondering why the school officials didn’t report this. I thought they’re required to at least tell law enforcement or parents about it.

@notinkansas4885

6 ай бұрын

I called the school of my nephew and cps, cops when my nephew came forward that his step dad was physically abusing him, sexually abusing girls. His mother was aware. Nothing was done. No one cared

@vaska1999

2 ай бұрын

​@@notinkansas4885😮

@vaska1999

2 ай бұрын

​@@notinkansas4885 I think the parents of abused children should start going to the media nore often, shaming the police and the cps and calling for investigations into their failure to protect the children and prosecute the abusers.

@ivankrushensky

Ай бұрын

@@notinkansas4885 Exactly. For people that have never had to deal with DHS/CPS (or whatever it's called in your state), they are pretty much worthless. Without any physical proof of a crime being committed, there isn't much they can do anyways. Texting "send me a video" isn't a crime. And this scumbag would just deny he meant anything sexual anyways. So until he actually gets caught with pedo material, nothing is likely to happen to him. We have a reactive system, not a proactive one. The really sad part is the Mother stuck around this POS after knowing what trash he was. That's honestly what bothers me more than anything (including my situation)- these family members that watch abuse and yet they stand by and do nothing. Whether it's because they don't want to "tarnish the family name", the "embarrassment", or to "protect their family".....it's garbage. And they watch it happen and pretend to "not know anything". All of those people are only one small notch below the perpetrator themselves. In my opinion.

Welcome to the no contact club! 🥰

Wow this poor girl . The gaslighting by the predator, her mother and her family is just vile . Go no contact .

What a revolting excuse for a mother and for a family!! Revolting!!

Protective Dad Delony is my favorite Dr. Delony

@elkejansevanrensburg4692

Ай бұрын

For sure!

You’re changing lives Dr. John. Thank you for what you do.

This story, unfortunately, is about as common as it gets. The only anomaly was the courage she had to tell her school counselor. And even then, her entire family did nothing. Completely disgusting and completely common.

This call broke my heart. This exact situation happened to my best friend growing up. Prayers and hugs to you, sweet Heather! ❤

That's the problem with women getting divorced when they have little daughters. The woman finds a new boyfriend and now these girls are living in the same household with a strange man that is not related to them. I hope I don't have to further explain how dangerous that situation is.

@thecramptons

6 ай бұрын

Yup

@dpborn2721

6 ай бұрын

Absolutely!! I was a single mom of a son and decided not to date until he was grown best decision I ever made. With a daughter it should be a no brainer. I even told my friend who’s a single father of a 9 yr old daughter to not even allow her to sleep over other single dads houses or moms with boyfriends or stepdads better to be overly cautious and protect her instead of risking her whole life being traumatized and no longer trusting men including him for a single incident. He never even thought about it before I brought it up.

@24wallachian

6 ай бұрын

@@dpborn2721 Kudos to you. It's really baffling that some women are perfectly reasonable and responsible and other women apparently have close to no mother instinct and love their relationships with random men more than they love their own children.

@thecramptons

6 ай бұрын

@@dpborn2721 100%. Same with my kids. No sleep overs

@StephaniePasq-hg7vt

25 күн бұрын

My stepdad never hurt me. My own biological relative did.

Do not cave into your mom and stepdad. Your mother should have protected you. When I was young, my stepmother was a drunk and she came into my room one night and threatened to kill me. It scared the hell out of me. I went to my father and he didn't believe me. Then my stepmother threw her luggage on their bed and she said she was leaving. So she was making my Dad choose between the two of us. So I ran away and went to a friend's house and I called my Dad to tell him where I was so he wouldn't worry about me and he told me "I don't care if you ever come home." Game over. I moved out completely when I was 15. I reunited with my father in my 50's after my stepmother died, but my father told me he had never seen his wife drunk. (She bought Scotch by the case and she drank and got drunk every day). My point is that Heather's mom is in complete denial. It happens and it hurts, but you have to walk away when the family home is toxic and dangerous.

This happened to me, but instead of texting me (since cell phones weren't really a thing then), he followed me into my room and slid his hand under my covers as I cried and screamed for him to stop. I was told it wasn't assault because I blacked out and don't remember anything else that happened. My mother then because very jealous of me. It hurt because I didn't understand what happened to me and why she hated me now. My husband and I have had to navigate our time together because some things still make me physically ill and cry, like when my husband put his hand on my thigh the first time or went to caress my face I have my own daughter now and I cannot comprehend how my mother and step father could've been they way they were. I trusted them. Thankfully, I can keep my daughter safe from my stepfather at least.

@the_review_lady_channel

6 ай бұрын

Have you been through trauma counseling? If not, I would suggest it. Good job being a protective parent!

@cookiegamesfamily

6 ай бұрын

@the_review_lady_channel thank you ❤️ Yes, I found one a few months ago. There is a lot in my life that they're helping me work through. It's slow and hard work, but it's worth it so I can best the best mom I can be for my kids. I'm also lucky my husband is so supportive and understanding, especially when I have a panic or shutdown moment.

@show_me_your_kitties

6 ай бұрын

I sure hope you aren't in contact with your monster and step monster.

@cookiegamesfamily

6 ай бұрын

@show_me_your_kitties we are not in any contact with either of them. When my daughter turned 5, she was getting out of kindergarten and he was there. He stopped her from coming to me and kept trying to get her to give him a hug and kiss. The look he gave her sent me into alarm mode. That's when I decided we were officially done. I kept thinking why the look made me react that way, and that's when memories started coming back. All of the sudden, everything made sense with the getting sick and panicking. I realized I had to do something and not just stand there letting him be in my daughter's life. Either of them! That's what gave me the final strength and push I needed to go no contact. I protect my children. Until that point I'd been hesitating because I'd been told for so long that the little feelings and nightmares I had were just my imagination and I didn't want to upset my mother and break up the family, that it was my job to keep them all happy and comfortable even if I wasn't. My children and I are safe ❤️ it's been about 5ish years now

@valerie9620

6 ай бұрын

@@cookiegamesfamily I am so proud of you for stepping up and protecting your kids. Your other family does not deserve to have you in their lives. I am so sorry that no one ever stood up for you and protected you. You deserved to be cherished and protected, and that monster deserved to be in jail. It’s sickening that you were treated that way. I am glad that you are getting help. It’s going to be hard and painful, and at times you’ll want to quit. Don’t. You are worth the effort and so are your husband and kids. You deserve peace, joy, and to enjoy your life and your beautiful family that you now have. ❤

Man, this one was heavy. Thank You John for your brutal honesty and reassurance to her

Wow.. disown your mother immediately. This is not a mother

One thing as a mother, I will ALWAYS take my daughter's side over a boyfriend, a man I'm dating, or even her dad. No child should EVER feel unsafe at home or with the men in their lives. It's our job as parents to protect them. My daughter can come to me with anything, and I will never judge her. This type of abuse makes girls distrust their instincts. Parents who neglect their children and ignore red flags makes me sick.

@abark

6 ай бұрын

As a mother if you actually took your daughter's side in anything you wouldn't be dating. Single mothers are the world's greatest incubator of crime.

This was awesome to listen to. Thank you John for your words. Thank you to the woman who opened up. I went through 18 years of physical abuse and my brothers, mother, grandma, and uncles all looked the other way. I cut them all out and I have so much more self respect and happiness now.

@karenkelley2024

3 ай бұрын

🩵 I also cut out almost everyone and the self respect and peace I have is tremendous! Glad you did it and so so sorry for what you went through 💔

@Bethy_anne

3 ай бұрын

Proud of us 🤗

Mom would no longer exist to me.

Unbelievable. Praying for you, your husband and your kids, Heather. Wish you had a mom who saw you for the gift that you were💕

It sickens me that animals have more developed protective instincts for their little ones than some humans. Her mother deserves to be in jail as much as her stepfather. He is a disgusting person but she is absolute garbage.

This was a powerful call with excellent advice from Dr. Delony. The only thing I would add is that sexual innuendo and/or comments from an adult parental figure (male or female) is NOT harassment, it is flat out sexual abuse. Touching doesn’t need to occur to meet the standard for abuse. I hope for her sake and for the safety of her children that she cuts ties with her mother and sister(s) who have dismissed or minimized the actions of the abuser. They’re not supportive and sound toxic.

I cried throughout this call. I have immense empathy for the caller and found listening to her and Dr. Delony to be healing for me. I'm glad I listened. I'm also glad he introduced her to the concept of "fawn." It is real and terrifying and suffocating. I tend to alternate between freeze and fawn and both responses are things I'll be working on probably for the rest of my life. I hope this caller will have the strength to follow Dr. Delony's guidance.

NOTE TO CALLER - Listen to John. Listen, and listen again. Your call is so warped in that we are all sitting here screaming why on earth would this be on you?!? LISTEN TO JOHN. And get some counseling.

It takes seconds to sexually abuse a child, saying he would be watched like a hawk is bull$h!p!! None of these people are safe. Protect yourself and your kids and listen to your husband, please!

Thank you, Dr. John, for giving this woman permission to honor what she already knew she needed to do, while those around her were trying to guilt her into silence again. The silence about sexual abuse has to stop, and your words to this woman will give courage to every other woman who has dealt with the same %$#@! their entire life, sometimes even for more than a half a century!

Sadly it is common. I could have been the caller here. Almost the exact scenario.

What a heartbreaking interaction. Dr. John obviously knows exactly what to say and how to address Heather's trauma. I'm grateful to him (thought I never experienced anything like this) that others can hear his concern and explanation that Heather needs to cut these people out of her life AND get trauma therapy. God bless you, Dr. John. Now Heather get to work on healing and thriving!

One of Delonys best calls.

Thank you for telling the truth about what is going on here. I deeply relate to this woman's story. I feel deeply validated by your response to her.

She is so brave. That “mother” is *Disgusting* ! How dear her not protect her child. Disgusting behavior from the sick step dad and sick mom.

I usually, but not always agree with Dr. John. I am a fan in general. To me Dr. John shines in crisis situation phone call (to me that falls into that category). I have never seen him not be spot on regarding a crisis situation telephone call, and I know he is trained in many fields, but crisis management is really his major area. It shows for sure.

Dr John this is the best advice I have ever heard given to a victim. Thank you.

Thank you Dr John.. we need more men like you❤

This broke me, realizing I’m a fawn to my own father. My heart breaks but our children will all know better

@elkejansevanrensburg4692

Ай бұрын

I am so sorry. Please be good to yourself and heal!

This young lady needs to let her husband protect her and the kids. Listen to your husband. Put your faith in him.

Sadly this doesn't surprise me. The call may be extreme (i.e. sexual abuse or inappropriate behavior toward children) BUT I have often seen parents put their own selfish needs ahead of their children. It's horrible and pathetic and no parent should put their own selfish needs ahead of the welfare of their children!

Dude. This just made my stomach churn, listening. It's way too relatable even though the sexual abuse in my home wasn't directed at me. There was plenty of OTHER abuse directed at me in my home, and the sexual abuse I experienced was outside the home, but...the "Well, he won't ever be alone..." Suuuure he won't: if they don't believe it's a big enough deal...they WILL NOT BE the kind of vigilant that is needed. Those GPS pins about men being scary and dangerous? That's literally me ALL THE TIME...that ALL men are untrustworthy unless proven otherwise, that none of them can be trusted to be safe in any environment...and the sense of it is STRONG. Even worse, when I trust one and then they don't stand up for me when I need it (no matter how small an issue)? I can't get that trust back.

Curious if her siblings were abused by this sicko, too. They may not be ready to deal.

Absolutely disgusting. The ultimate betrayal from an enabling family. I can't even fathom what she's gone through.

Omg...Block him and your mother for staying with him.

This is very sad. I’m so sorry this happened to her and happens actually far more often than many people realize

This was very healing for me.

@Bethy_anne

6 ай бұрын

Me too 😊 sending love to you, random stranger on the internet!

@the_review_lady_channel

5 ай бұрын

@@Bethy_annethanks Beth Ann, I needed that today 🤍

Yeah, I would have to say I don't think I could deal with the rest of my family if they were okay with inviting my predator to special occasions. This is beyond creepy, even if I wasn't the vicitim just having the knowledge someone like that is around me thats done something like would pretty much do it for me, I wouldn't want anything to do with them. The fact her sister made that comment, tells me they probably don't believe her or thought she was making a big deal out of nothing and they were just humoring her by not inviting stepdad to family functions.

Her family sounds very uneducated and uncaring. Mom is disgusting. I hope this young woman is strong enough to stand up against ALL of them.

Thank you so much for every word and intention. At first I was listening for the woman in the video, but during your talk to her it became personal. I remember a lunch lady was the only adult who cared and called social services. I wish I could reach out to her and tell her thank you and I’m sorry for getting angry that she told 😭💔 I was so angry back then, I hope she knows I’m grateful

@elkejansevanrensburg4692

Ай бұрын

@em8302 I am so sorry to hear that you had to go through that. Are you okay now?

@em8302

Ай бұрын

@@elkejansevanrensburg4692 I’m doing amazing now after therapy and meeting an incredible man, thank you for asking! And I finally found the lunch lady online and thanked her!

In these cases of child predators, it ends up as the victim being in the wrong. The family accepting that jerk over her the victim is wrong. John is so right, go no contact with that family.

Her mother doesn’t deserve the title of mother. I have bipolar disorder and I would NEVER allow anyone to hurt my child.

I went through the same things when I was younger that this young woman went through and I still can't forgive my mother. I am 56 and I can only tolerate her, I want to move on and forgive her for being with this man, but I still have nightmares about things that happened to me when I was a child

@Bethy_anne

6 ай бұрын

Just remember that forgiveness is for you and nobody else. You forgive to let go of the pain, but this does not mean condoning what happened or putting yourself in situations that make you feel unsafe.

@tracyaf6084

6 ай бұрын

She doesn’t deserve your forgiveness. Hopefully you’ve not become bitter but I don’t think you need to forgive someone when they’ve done something unforgivable. You deserved better than her. She is the problem, not you. I don’t believe you really want to forgive her. I think you just want to have a different relationship with her. You want for her to have been different so you could have a good mother. Unfortunately she is not worthy of you. I’m so sorry she didn’t cherish and protect you like the blessing you were to her.

Att men take notes, this man (dr. John)is an emotional stud😘

My mom. I still keep communication with her but im considering telling her everything i felt and still feel and stop talking to her for good. Me as a mom of a 14 year myself i cannot comprehend how she did that to me. I am the best mom i can be to my son and daughter and they always be my priority. No matter what.

This call is making me want to finally tell a secret about my step dad's behavior. Thank you, Heather, for your bravery.

@elkejansevanrensburg4692

Ай бұрын

Elise, are you okay? Do not keep quiet while the shame of evils is keeping you a prisoner. Break the silence and the hold the past have on you.

@elisegothlix1183

Ай бұрын

@elkejansevanrensburg4692 shame doesn't keep me quiet, her safety does. She is still trapped. I'm fine now. Thanks 🖤

@elisegothlix1183

Ай бұрын

@@elkejansevanrensburg4692 just so you know, I came out this weekend and told my mother. It made no difference to her. I'm heartbroken. Nothing will make her see at this point.

@reneeantwi-boasiako3974

5 күн бұрын

​@@elisegothlix1183I'm so sorry 🙏🏿 ❤️

Thank you Dr John for your strong, powerful, correct and loving response to this precious young lady. Bless you.❤

Girl, f them family members. Let your husband be your guide and lead. Sounds like he’s trying to protect you. Let him. Let him have this burden. He wants it. He wants to stand in front of you and take these hits from your family.

@agricolaregs

6 ай бұрын

Also, if anyone has it in their hearts to throw 5 bucks to Chevy Burroughs fundraiser, please do so. Dad’s name is Kevin Burroughs. Please google it. God bless.

THROW THE ENTIRE FAMILY AWAY!! HOW DISGUSTING....... I am so sorry that you went through that. It sounds like nobody protected you or cared. And the crazy part is that you're still going through it..... Just be done with your family..... You have your own family now and I'm glad that you are protecting your girls

Sweet girl, I'm so sorry you are experiencing this & have in the past! You are such a precious woman. As a Grandma, I'm broken hearted your Mom & family didn't respect you more. I wish the best for you❤️

My mom is similar. She even took it a step further and admitted to catching him once and did absolutely nothing. When we went to court she never supported me. It wasn't until he went to prison that she divorsed him and she has been confused ever since by our strained relationship. She is very mentally ill and skews what happened all the time and flips things. I've started to distance myself from her again since I've had my son. He is 3 and she has hardly shown any interest in him and I can't understand her for it. I just can't anymore.

@vaska1999

2 ай бұрын

Go no contact. It will help you, enormously.

@reneeantwi-boasiako3974

5 күн бұрын

@abigailloar956 I'm so sorry 🙏🏿 ❤️

My Mom did not protect me. And my extended family did not, either. A great conversation. Dealing with a Mother's/family betrayal is tough.

@vaska1999

2 ай бұрын

I'm sorry you had no one to believe and protect you. Your family failed you. Utterly. I feel for everyone who's been through such a thing.

@jessiejoseph1093

2 ай бұрын

@@vaska1999 Thank you so much. Thank you very much.

@reneeantwi-boasiako3974

5 күн бұрын

​@@jessiejoseph1093 I'm so sorry 🙏🏿 ❤️

@jessiejoseph1093

5 күн бұрын

@@reneeantwi-boasiako3974 thank you for showing compassion to a stranger. People can be pretty icky to kids.

Great Point John!!!

I like you and your wisdom Dr. Deloney. You are the best!

The predator lives next door! The call is coming from inside the house. People are obsessed with Hollyweird, meanwhile they will excuse the troop leader down the street or an uncle or aunt. It all starts locally.

Thank you!

Wow! I really feel for her. I can’t imagine finding out about abuse to my biological kid 8 years after it started. Why didn’t the school call him. Stepdad’s disappearance would probably still be an unsolved mystery.

If she allows her kids to be around these perverts, her husband needs to divorce and get custody.

This is a heartbreakingly common scenario.

What makes the family feel comfortable is to pretend nothing happened while you are in pain and anguish behind the sick stuff your Stepfather had done to you. No excuses for Mom. She should have protected you above all! Sad to say, he could be trying to do this to another female child in the family as well as take it to the next horrible level. They have taken this pervert's side. If I never get invited to family events anymore, so be it!!

I was never sexually abused, but I know both men and women who have. I have five boys, and through example I am teaching them all about consent, and self defense. 1 in 6 boys are sexually abused as children, and I promise to teach them, that they do not need to tolerate abuse in any way.

@reneeantwi-boasiako3974

5 күн бұрын

God bless you 🙏🏿 ❤️

At some level this teenager knew her mother needed that men (alcoholic, mental illness) so that is why she likely did not go to her father for help. She defended her mother, when the mother did not defend her at all.

@tracyaf6084

6 ай бұрын

That’s just a whole other level of sad. No child should be responsible for their parent. The tide of obligation runs the other way. 😢 I just can’t even imagine not protecting my child in a situation like this.

The sister is far too trusting, because she’s not thinking about the fact that this man did this with her own mother in the house knowing what he did. So if the sister thinks her kids are safe around that man because her mother is around-her mother didn’t protect the caller from him, so those grandkids aren’t safe with her either. Would it change her thinking if she found out stepdad had videos of her, too? Because I bet he does and she doesn’t know it. He’s sick. It didn’t only involve the caller or stop there, either. Her family sucks and need to wake up.

I wonder if her sister(s) were also included in his advances? Why would he just stop with her? What a life! 😡

I'm sad for this young lady. Her mother may have her own issues but there's no excuse for not siding with her daughter.

How you handle it? "If he's there, I'm not." The mom is obviously evil, but I can't believe the rest of the family is willing to go along with this. Everyone wants to make nice and they don't mind putting their own children at risk to do so.

@the_review_lady_channel

6 ай бұрын

Toxic family systems.

@amyhull754

6 ай бұрын

I would not trust the family to tell the truth about whether the stepfather would show up now that they've said they don't see how it's still a big deal. I would be unsurprised if Heather were told he wasn't going to be there, only to arrive and find he IS there or shows up, leaving Heather, if she were to attend functions, in the position of having to pack up and leave to make her point...which still might just be dismissed as her "creating drama" or some such.

@gwenj5419

6 ай бұрын

@@amyhull754 Good point.

31 Seconds into the vidoe: Trauma survivor: “Should I move past my trauma for the comfort of others” Delony: “I don’t even know what the trauma is and the answer is ‘no’” 31 Seconds is all it takes! This simple response to trauma survivors is so powerful and rightfully validating. Thank you for standing up for those of us who have found you because we are constantly questioning if we made the right choices - to leave, to stand up and fight, to heal, to sing the songs of our survival - we need to know we are worth it - so thank you for that!

Heather, I can relate. My mom married a man when I was in 6th grade who turned out to be a MAJOR sex offender. Luckily he never touched me but oh boy did he make a lot of comments to me and about me. My mom ended up divorcing him and later found out he was molesting his stepchildren from his marriage after my mom. This was about 25 years ago. He was in prison up until a couple years ago. I wouldn't be surprised if your stepdad ends up in prison too. Things always get found out. I have a son who is 5, and I still freak out inside if he is in another room with an adult and the door is closed, or closes on its own. All because of my mom's ex husband from so long ago. I think John is spot on with this one. I hope you can get the help & support you need as you navigate this awful situation.

@reneeantwi-boasiako3974

5 күн бұрын

I'm so sorry 🙏🏿 ❤️

He needs locked up!!!

Don't assume the predator limits his victims to family members! Very very unlikely. Make sure that people with kids know who they are dealing with. Make yourself a new family that lives in purity. Godspeed.

I am going through a similar situation. I have cut off ties with my mother. The best analogy I gave to her was “If you had a dog that bit a neighborhood child I wouldn’t want it around my kids.”. To which my mother replied “Well you never liked the dog.”. It’s been over two years since I talked to her. One of the best decision I’ve ever made because that reply was indicative of her whole personality and how she treated me my whole life. Love, The Scapegoat

@reneeantwi-boasiako3974

5 күн бұрын

I'm so sorry 🙏🏿 ❤️

Say in the letter…if anyone asks where I am, show them an image of this letter. If you don’t show them this letter you are as evil as the perpetrator.

Go no contact permanently. You shouldn't come to family events. See if you can still press charges for harrassment and the videos. You don't want his pedo energy in your presence. The school should have press charges.

I think everyone that has been abused should live their truth. Never feel ashamed to share all the information you have on the perpetrator . I would never want to have someone tell me later they wish they knew. I have lost a lot of family members just for this reason and they have chosen him, however I live in peace knowing I followed my heart and did what I felt was right. Their comfort is not important yours is.

Get him in jail that’s where he should be

My father was a predator and ex husband....please watch your kids even the one who u think they safe with.

Lots of similarities between her story and mine. I finally figured out that I needed to cut out my step-father cause believe it or not it took a while. Sisters came around eventually and he’s not a part of anything. My mom is still in our lives. She doesn’t deserve it, I hate it sometimes, but it’s also a very personal choice and I have a relationship with her. I have to forgive her daily for still living with him. It’s not for everyone to make the choice I have. All in all it’s just heartbreaking. 💔

@vaska1999

2 ай бұрын

I don't question your choice, but I know mine would be different. My mother believed me when I told her an uncle by marriage had molested me, and she protected both me and my sister ever after. I never had to see that creep again.

@caroc4327

Ай бұрын

@@vaska1999 I love that for you. I still wish my mom would choose me instead of herself, cause it's not even about my abuser, it's about my mom being a selfish person.

@vaska1999

Ай бұрын

@@caroc4327 I hate to say this, but the likelihood of your mother becoming the person you wish she were are probably around zero. It may be less painful in the long run to accept that and mourn the fact she is as she is. I wish you full emotional healing and freedom, from the heart!

@reneeantwi-boasiako3974

5 күн бұрын

@caroc4327 I'm so sorry 🙏🏿 ❤️