The fact that she was totally surprised told me how out of touch she is with her own family... really you're shocked that a practicing Catholic family is upset you're marrying a Muslim. Practicing Catholics don't usually want you to marry outside of the Catholic faith period much less outside of Christendom.

@khanhminhnguyen7274

3 жыл бұрын

I wish some day humans take religious wisdom to better themselves instead of religious doctrine to harm each other.

@grod805

3 жыл бұрын

Ok and Muslims are even less willing to accept that's why they will force her to convert and not the other way around

@josmith5419

3 жыл бұрын

@@grod805 exactly. That’s the goal for Muslims. The men marry Christian women and force them to convert, and then the children are raised Muslim. It’s always like that.

@mauricejohnson2610

3 жыл бұрын

@@josmith5419 as it should be just like a Christian should want there kids raised to be Christian's or do u and them not believe jesus when he says u less u believe I am then u will die in your sins. He is talking about unless u believe he is GOD ur going to die in ur sins.

@josmith5419

3 жыл бұрын

@@mauricejohnson2610 what haha. I’m saying it’s always everyone else who has to change when they marry a Muslim. Therefore, as a Christian(this girl) she should keep her faith and want to raise her kids as Christians. Islam isn’t the way to go. Read the Quran and you’ll see why.

She needs to research his faith, beliefs, traditions, family values, child rearing and spiritual laws. Do not go into any marriage blindly. Many Blessings!

@josmith5419

3 жыл бұрын

Yes. She needs to know about Islam’s beliefs. For example, Mohammad was in his fifties when he married one of his wives and consummated the marriage when she was 9.

@mauricejohnson2610

3 жыл бұрын

She need to research her own religion first. If she did she wouldn't be going outside the church to find answers because the answers are there.

@mustafaalawsi7724

3 жыл бұрын

@@josmith5419 Dude she wasn't 9. Why do you keep copying and pasting.

@rachelking7002

3 жыл бұрын

@@mustafaalawsi7724 how old was she? Was she a minor? If she was that's all that matters. The point is she was a child. I don't care what religion she or he is in there is child abuse in all of them. One way or another. It's sad but so true and we just need to do our job as parents and keep them safe from predators. I think she needs to learn everything she can about his religion and faith to make a better decision regardless.

@mareehutchin2702

3 жыл бұрын

Well the Catholic Church is certainly not innocent when it comes to child abuse…

This is the story of one of my cousins. She was all about becoming Muslim, raising kids Muslim, married a Muslim. But she happily put up a Xmas tree after they married and he quickly took it down. She didnt realize that accepting the new Muslim traditions and raising kids Muslim would also mean no more xmas tree, xmas cookies, presents, no more Easter baskets, none of it. Hopefully this woman is aware of everything that she is letting go of, even if she doesnt care much about the beliefs behind the celebrations/traditions. My cousin has long since divorced, hopefully this couple gets premarital counceling.

@intermediateopal8059

3 жыл бұрын

Depends on the person. My muslim friend married a guy who converted for her, but she can't wait to put up a christmas tree 🤷‍♀️

@anni3274

3 жыл бұрын

I understand that this can happen but not all Muslims are the same. I know tons of Muslim families that celebrate christmas or at least would not tear down a tree.

@ajyeezy7920

3 жыл бұрын

But she can also celebrate Eid (twice a year). A holiday doesn’t define a religion so I think it’s important like you say to possibly get premarital counselling and also discuss things like this in the open

@josmith5419

3 жыл бұрын

That’s how it always happens. People need to research Islam before marrying a Muslim. By research I mean go right to the source and read the Quran and Hadith. They’ll find many sick things like allowing men to beat their wives, marrying up to four wives, and the fact that Mohammad(their lovely prophet) married one of his wives when she was 6, and consummated the marriage at age 9. He was in his fifties.... Muslims think this is okay.

@ajyeezy7920

3 жыл бұрын

@@josmith5419 Every single one of those statements you made are wrong, and you’ve said this with no factual evidence whatsoever and that is what’s wrong with the world today as in your head you think you’re actually right! And you got upvoted by equally stupid individuals

Even if they're not practicing religions... They most likely each have deep religious principles about life they've never voiced or questioned aloud. I would recommend a very intense pre-marital counseling session because this is still a risky marriage even if not practicing their named faiths.

@anthill1510

4 ай бұрын

Yes, I know a lot of muslims that are not religious but they live the muslim CULTURE which has very different ideas about women and marriage than "an independent New York woman" does. She is unbelievably naive marrying a muslim man and saying "I guess we will raise them muslim, I am not very religious." Girl, that culture will dictate your whole life!

I've been there done that. I thought I was liberal enough to handle it. 2 different religions are like water and oil. No matter how much you try it won't work.

@kayann3523

3 жыл бұрын

Not always true. I know a couple that is Jewish and Catholic who are perfectly happy. Yes both are lite practicing.

@josmith5419

3 жыл бұрын

Exactly, especially when Islam is involved. The other person ALWAYS has to convert to Islam and never the other way around.

@jameslastname9171

3 жыл бұрын

She’s really weak in her religion so she’s ok with converting

@TheAgentmigs

3 жыл бұрын

It can definitely work.

@NietzscheanMan

3 жыл бұрын

@@TheAgentmigs some people can hold their breath for 15 minutes. Most will die.

Why would she raise her kids Muslims if he isn’t even a proper Muslim? Raise them to think for themselves and not tell them what to believe.

@1993muth

2 жыл бұрын

Because he still has the core beleifs. He is just not overtly religious, that's why he dated her before propsing marrige. One of the requirements for marrying women of the book (Christians or jews) is that a man must raise his children as Muslims. If she does not agree to raise their kids Muslim, he cannot marry her.

@briansanchez6699

Жыл бұрын

@@1993muth the same requirement for raising their kids applies to Catholics but I’m not sure she really considers herself Catholic

There is SOOOO much more to marrying a Muslim man than religion. It’s a COMPLETELY different culture than most American women are probably use to, even if he was raised in the US. This should not be entered into lightly and will be fraught with difficulty to overcome on both ends. I dated a Muslim man for a year. A greater person but it would have NEVER worked.

@BG-nm5xt

11 ай бұрын

Cultural differences can be huge, especially after marriage, better talk to him about the reality of life and Muslim dress and customs and his expectations about roles and family. Do you really want to lose your Catholic family forever and just be Muslim? I don't think you do!

@anthill1510

4 ай бұрын

She is completely clueless. I am amazed how somebody can have a realtionship with a muslim man and be so clueless. She will have a rude awakening after marriage. "I guess we are gonna raise them muslim, religion is just not important to me". It doesn`t matter if religion is important to her, it will dictate her life and her childrens life. Actually more the muslim culture than the religion, but she is obviously not aware of that, either.

Men and women are viewed very different in the world of Islam... My step sister ignored these aspects of Islam when she met her husband, up until she couldn't...

@olivias2836

3 жыл бұрын

I agree when it comes to devout Muslims. This guy seems not be a strict practicing Muslim as she said religion wasn’t a big issue for them. She said she wasn’t planning to convert to Islam to marry him, if he’s not pushing her to convert my guess is he’s not a strict believer. I know plenty of highly educated Muslims in my area who live pretty westernized lives and aren’t too strictly religious.

@Funwithnine

3 жыл бұрын

This. My godmother nearly lost her children in Syria when her husband became ill. She was not permitted to leave with them as custody went from her husband to her husband's brother. Her 13 year old daughter was only spared marriage to a 49 year old afterwards due to intervention by the state department as the children were American citizens.

@arifjonatan9300

3 жыл бұрын

@@olivias2836 In the long-run, devout or non-practicing muslims will behave the same. It's better to stay away from it.

@ajyeezy7920

3 жыл бұрын

@@arifjonatan9300 Then you will know that Islam gives women more rights than men have.

@joekerr392

3 жыл бұрын

@@arifjonatan9300 Bigotry much??

I like how you put this information for her. But I would tell her this, it will not be easy for her. Her life WILL change no matter what he tells her and she’s gotta be ready for that

So the parents are Catholic enough to be upset about the fiancé but not Catholic enough to care that her faith means nothing to her?

@hawkgurl1157

3 жыл бұрын

Good point

@Lovrofthearts

3 жыл бұрын

We don't know they're not upset by her lack of faith. Caller did not include enough information for us to ascertain that. They may not know. Many people drift from the faith they were raised in and aren't exactly eager to share all of their doubts and unbelief with their family members over time and just avoid the topic when it comes up. Or parents may be cafeteria Catholics/lukewarm in their faith and it was only her announcement that she's marrying a Muslim that finally woke them up to the extent of her rejection of her faith.

@lmlmlmlm7627

3 жыл бұрын

@@Lovrofthearts totally agree. OP makes some assumptions

@BassPlayer60134

3 жыл бұрын

@@lmlmlmlm7627 I have not yet even begun to make assumptions.

@probablynot1368

3 жыл бұрын

The caller didn’t share the reaction her Muslim fiancés parents had when they met her. I’ve known a number of Muslims who absolutely insist the Christian ‘infidel’ must change faith before marrying. The realization of no Christmas, no Ash Wednesday, no Holy Thursday, no Good Friday, no Easter, no All Saints day is going to hit her hard when she has children.

It’s sad to me that some parents give ultimatums to their kids.. “it’s him or us” ?? You can express your concern & why you think this is a bad idea with love & patience..

@mrss4328

Жыл бұрын

She’s doing this to rebel against her good daughter status. Not a good way to break away.

I expect another call in 6 months

@lmlmlmlm7627

3 жыл бұрын

Lol ... totally.. repeat customer 😉

@NaNa-lt1po

3 жыл бұрын

@@lmlmlmlm7627 there's just no solution for stupid

@MichaelJones-rn2pq

3 жыл бұрын

Better in 6 months than in 8 years trying to get her abducted kids back from Pakistan.

@abrahamflores2566

3 жыл бұрын

Maybe.... or maybe 8 years from now her kids get molested at the catholic church. Nobody knows

@susieq8008

3 жыл бұрын

Give it 3...Easter and Valentine's is coming ...oh and she connects with muslim traditions ?

I would never marry outside of my beliefs nor would I do that to someone else. So much trouble down the road with this one.

@lilithowl

16 күн бұрын

She's not marrying outside of her beliefs..she's marrying outside of her parents' beliefs. Which are irrelevant.

She sounds very naive. “I guess we’ll raise our kids Muslim” shows she has no idea what that really means. Just because she is Catholic in name only does not mean the same for him and Islam. What if they end up traveling to his home country- she seems to have no idea what she would be in for. She would have no rights, none.

@signalfire15

3 жыл бұрын

His home country? How do you know that her fiance isn't American?

@juniorgod321

3 жыл бұрын

That's BS! Women who marry into the Islam faith do get a lot of rights... and also a lot of lefts and a lot of kicks:)

@blueStarKitt7924

2 ай бұрын

​@@signalfire15Exactly.🤷

Honestly I was worried you would not say your 2nd half Dr. D. - her parents possibly could have approached the topic more gingerly, but you're absolutely correct, they see the truck about to run her down and I'm glad you made her stop and think about it in that way.

Big mistake and I say this as a Muslim woman. One should never marry someone who has a different religion.

@jaciemokidm609

11 ай бұрын

She said she doesn't connect with Catholicism and is preparing to raise their kids as Muslims. Islam allows it, no problem. As long as she was sure, there was no problem. Allah is the best of planners ❤️

I’m sorry but she’s okay with raising her kids Muslim and she’s surprised her Catholic family has a problem with this? Whether you like it or not that was a totally predictable response. It also means she isn’t getting married through the church bc in order to do that you have to promise to raise your children Catholic. It may hurt but her parents faith doesn’t seem to be hers so conflicts like this are pretty much inevitable

“There’s no pressure” Yeah right. See you in a couple of years.

@joekr9424

3 жыл бұрын

More like the day after the wedding.

This was difficult to listen to. John, I really wish you gave the advice of premarital counseling / couples counseling. Parents aside, she clearly needs to figure out her spiritual beliefs as an individual, independent of her family or fiance, then her and her fiance need to sit down with someone who can objectively help them honestly discuss what religion will look like in their home. She says if they have kids they'll be raised Muslim, does she understand what that entails. As a future Mother it's important for her to know what that means and to learn and understand the faith she's choosing. Love is cute before life gets real and practical. Love is definitely needed but it's only one building block when it comes to such a big decision like marriage. After she's figured out herself with the right help then she'll at least be able to communicate with her parents with a clear conscious because then she knows what she believes and why no matter the consequences. I genuinely wish her the best.

@eCouchPotatoe

2 жыл бұрын

"Love is cute before life gets real and practical." My favorite quote of the month. Thank you

@anthill1510

4 ай бұрын

She has no idea what it means. She sounds unbelievable naive and will have a rude awakening once she gets married. I hope her pride doesn`t keep her from divorcing for too long.

premarital counseling is crucial in this case.

YOU HAVEN'T EVEN TOLD YOUR PARENTS ABOUT YOUR ENGAGEMENT!!! 🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄🙄 THAT IS HOW UNSURE YOU ARE ABOUT MARRYING HIM!!! DON'T GET MARRIED TO SPITE YOUR PARENTS 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️!!!!

@anthill1510

4 ай бұрын

Yes, the only way I can explain her being so dumb as not to take marrying A MUSLIM MAN seriously is that this is her rebellion against her "good girl role". This is a really stupid, dangerous way to rebel. I hope she wakes up to the reality of what that means before having kids with him.

The comment section was really an eye opening experience for me as a Muslim. At least five of my friends are in the same situation and they are all happily married with kids. People think Muslims came from Mars or something.

@coffeesnob3778

3 жыл бұрын

As a Muslim, practitioner or not, would you convert to another religion for your spouse? Muslim have a "reputation", of being inflexible. I am a Catholic turned to Buddhism. My best friends are Muslims (2 females). I love my friends. I found Islam fascinating. But I wouldn't be able to be a spouse of a Muslim (I ended up a relationship with a man once because "I didn't convert". I asked him, "does it matter? That I don't pray like you do? That I don't follow your books, nor your rules, and have a different Faith system as yours?". He cried a lot when we broke up. It did matter to him. I couldn't convert to his belief system, "I could lie to you, your friends, and your family. I could be quiet and pretend if you want. I'd rather not to."

@inspyr9

3 жыл бұрын

@@coffeesnob3778 I would not force anybody to convert. If you are not genuine in your beliefs, then what's the point of converting. Islam is not just about praying and reading the book. It gives you a lifestyle guideline that I think, gives a family the best chance of lasting success. I also read a little about Siddhartha Gautama's teachings and I learned from it. I wish you find peace and happiness in it.

@apracity7672

2 жыл бұрын

@@inspyr9 hey man, just to let you know only Christ saves, and nothing you can do will be good enough for you to enter heaven, you need the grace of God and you can accept it by putting your faith in the work of Christ on the Cross

@theluckienurse

2 жыл бұрын

The comments are disappointing… her parents are ignorant and hateful. And the comments section is filled with ignorant people who are trying to pass off as loving/wise but they’re just as ignorant.

@apracity7672

2 жыл бұрын

@@theluckienurse how so?

She says she doesn't care much about religion so they would raise their children as Muslim. I think she shop learn exactly what that means in depth before deciding.

The girl is setting herself up for misery just to get back at her parents.

@1993muth

2 жыл бұрын

Disagree. I believe this moment in her life can be a blessing. It could be the driving force that pushes her into wanting to investigate her own faith and her husbands and having the neccasary difficult conversations.

I hate to say this about this young lady, but she is severely uninformed and shortsighted about what she is getting involved in. There are alot of ways I could dissect this, since it's a very nuanced scenario here, but overall I don't think she's making the right decision. I don't even think the parents are even the main issue here at all quite frankly, so I'm not sure how it became about them and their supposed terrible ultimatum. My family didn't accept my brother's "wife" either years ago, and we warned him sternly about very specific things we noticed. He didn't listen, and we also gave very specific ultimatums about how we were going to conduct things. We didn't dismiss him or anything, and the child he had with her is welcomed as well(even if we don't think it's his); we even went on trips with her, but our warnings did not change, and neither did she. And now for the exact reasons we warned about, he is now getting divorced years later. I could also go over the issues, requirements, expectations, and pitfalls that come with marrying a religious Muslim male, which is quite extensive, regardless of how politically incorrect it's become to discuss, but I won't here. All I'll say is she better be careful. I'm a Christian guy myself, and live in NY as well, and would also warn her in person, if I could, if I were a friend or family member.

@grod805

3 жыл бұрын

Completely agree. My two best friends are Muslims so I've had a lot of conversation about religion with them. Let's just say their beliefs are a bit nutty. I love them to death and they are great, kind people but there's no denying it. The parents aren't being selfish the daughter is just misinformed and naive

@ajyeezy7920

3 жыл бұрын

Don’t you think she’s talked to him and he’s set the ground rules if she was to convert? Her parents will come round

@DarthBalsamic

3 жыл бұрын

@@ajyeezy7920 I totally disagree. This is the reason why I said I won't get into specifics in my comment because that goes quite far; and based on the way she was talking, and yes, 25 year olds are quite dumb in today's age, especially here in NY, she has no clue what she's getting herself into. She said multiple things here that exposed her shortsightedness and doesn't make sense. And no, her parents will not come around, and rightfully so, if they hold to their values and not capitulate. Folks pretend, and this is why I say this is politically incorrect, like these scenarios never happen and don't go wrong more times than not; especially when it comes to mixed Islamic marriages specifically where the female is on the outside coming in. It's not hyperbolic to say that, and in fact is prudent to recognize that. Again, if I were her friend or family member, I would respectfully caution her as well.

@mauricejohnson2610

3 жыл бұрын

If she is a Christian the bible has already put the subject to rest when in 2 Corinthians 6 it says dont be unequally yoked with unbelievers.

@DarthBalsamic

3 жыл бұрын

@@mauricejohnson2610 Here's the thing, I agree with your sentiment as it is biblically. Hence why I also agree with the parents, and don't think they're a problem here. With that said, she isn't a Christian according to her own words. She grew up culturally within it, but is not one herself. Her parents being Christians doesn't make her one by default. We have to be very clear on that. All that aside, the problem here, and this is where the caution is, is her apparent submission to Islamic standards that she doesn't seem very clear on. She is marrying a Muslim man who practices Islam, and there is alot that goes along with that which she clearly does not realize or understand, especially since she's strangely loose with allowing her children to be raised within Islam. She clearly doesn't not understand what this means as she doesn't seem to realize that she can't just be on the outside looking in with that. Her marriage to him requires subverviance to their laws and observances. Unfortunately for her, especially as someone who doesn't come from that at all, and appears to want to be secular, this combination, from my long observations and research on this, usually doesn't go well. My hope is that she doesn't have to find this out the hard way. On a side note, being "unequally yoked" is actually a natural law, especially within marriage. For Christians this is important because of our connection to Christ, but it also points to it being universal within humanity. Jesus said it best that even Satan cannot be divided against himself. Even in secular marriages and normal relationships this rule applies. Even in society when there is a meshing of two incompatible agendas, things will go bad. Why? Because "unequally yoked" simply means agreement on foundational principles that cannot be violated otherwise they will invite problems. This is why with a situation like with this young lady, things will go bad. She's unwittingly entering into something that she clearly is uninformed about, which distorts any agreement she ostensibly makes. She's in for a rude awakening unfortunately. I personally think she's just being rebellious, or something much worse is happening that I won't speak on here.

Oh God, this is a bad idea. She should NOT be jumping into this at all. They need pre-marital counseling. She seems to have no idea how much her life will change getting married to a Muslim (and likely, his getting married to a Catholic). This is NOT a good choice. They very well may love each other, but you need to marry someone you is like you, not someone who you is moving in a completely different direction. If she even travels with him to a Muslim country, she could lose her rights entirely and have no legal rights to her own children. I understand why her parents are upset, and I would be too. The fact that she is Catholic is irrelevant. She could be protestant, jewish, buddist, or born again Christian. Not one of these would be compatible with Islam. Even as a "strong" NYC girl - she has no clue what she is signing up for. If I were her friend, I would strongly caution her to think twice about this, and get out NOW! I am NOT saying that all Muslims are bad people AT ALL. I am saying that the culture is incompatible with western culture.

Listen to your parents, but live for you. My mother gave me an ultimatum 14 years ago and we no longer speak. She has no relationship with her grandchild. But that is her decision.

In this particular situation, the parents are absolutely right. It’s not about eternity. It’s about life right here on earth. It’s about kids it’s about not having Christmas the grief that she may have surrounding gender roles. The parents are right. She’s about to make a terrible mistake she’s begging for misery. Just marry somebody who has your same basic values.

Go with what you know in your heart. My one bit of advice is to be aware that you may have grown up with different worldviews and morals due to your upbringings. Find a good premarital course and be honest with each other.

@mauricejohnson2610

3 жыл бұрын

She should search her heart for if she actually believes the religion she grew up with.

From my experience if you truly believe and practice Catholicism don't do it. You will have sooooooooo many issues when you get older. Look into Catholicism first before u do anything

@elygarcia2855

3 жыл бұрын

@Persephone Amelia please explain

This girl doesn’t have a personal faith. Her Catholic parents have a deeper issue than her marrying a man outside the faith.

Her parents are just completely right. Point blank.

@blueStarKitt7924

2 ай бұрын

About?

She's not a Christian she said it herself.

This woman's husband will be the same way as her parents if their children were to marry a nonmuslim LOL.

@grod805

3 жыл бұрын

Absolutely. Just yesterday I watched a documentary on ex Muslims getting beat because they left Islam.

I hate being the "perfect daughter". It affects me when I make a decision against my family's view. Yet I'm not happy at all when im choose to forsake myself for my family's happiness. Either way, everyone will feel some type of emotions. Im just learning how to make myself happy and stick to my decision.

The comments in here are....yikes.

Don't do it. it's going to cause a lot of problems when you have children. it's too different.

I am Only A Catholic when I feel like it...🙄🙄🙄🙄👏👏👏👏

@mauricejohnson2610

3 жыл бұрын

Aka she isnt 1 it's a case of she grew up around the christian symbols and people and she know thinks she is one even tho she isnt.

@abrahamflores2566

3 жыл бұрын

Good for her

@apracity7672

2 жыл бұрын

@@abrahamflores2566 why?

This isn't going to work. As Dave says all the time, differences in religion between spouses is a recipe for disaster.

@ravenestrella2310

2 жыл бұрын

But she doesn’t really believe in the faith, thus she’s not really a part of it. Dave’s an excellent financial expert, but he’s not a relationship expert. He knows this. That’s why he hired Dr.Delony. Dr.Delony was 100% right in everything he said here. I’m not even Christian myself, and I agree with him wholeheartedly.

@gogogolyra1340

Жыл бұрын

Huh? Do u need phd’s to be an expert at relationships? Bruh u just need experience and a lot of common sense

I hope she looks into what being the wife of a devout Muslim will mean. Should he become a devout Muslim, her life will not be one of an independent New York woman. If she has a daughter, that little girl will not have anything of the life she has had prior. If she is truly thinking with her head & not just with her heart, then go for it. Otherwise, she will be in for a life of grief.

@drdianneLc

3 жыл бұрын

@9INE PLANETS I agree. I think she has no clue about what she wants to do. An independent woman will not survive.

@drdianneLc

3 жыл бұрын

@9INE PLANETS Amen to all of that. Absolutely truth right there.

@keepstriving4672

3 жыл бұрын

🙄 looks like people need to have some Muslim friends. These comments are so ignorant, I'm embarrassed for y'all. Get some diversity in your lives, trust me, it will be a lot more fulfilling.

@drdianneLc

3 жыл бұрын

@@keepstriving4672 I personally know quite a few Muslim women. They are not Americanized Muslims. They are traditional, middle eastern women. Perhaps it is you who needs to be educated.

@keepstriving4672

3 жыл бұрын

@@drdianneLc lol, Americanized, ok. Good job boxing the "others" in. ✌🏿

She should watch the movie called ”Not without my daughter” to see what happens when you marry Muslim. I had a bad experience when I had relationship with a Muslim man. I lost my parents and the guy. I just hope this does not happen to her. No hate replies please.

@ajyeezy7920

3 жыл бұрын

Well not everyone is the same, Islam itself gives women a LOT of rights and respect. Just because the guy you found wasn’t up to scratch doesn’t mean that it’ll happen with every Muslim guy.

@topcomment3816

3 жыл бұрын

@@ajyeezy7920 Hahahahahaha. You mean they give you the right to take your robe off for hanky panky? And then you have to put it on again.

@ajyeezy7920

3 жыл бұрын

@@topcomment3816 haaa ha! No.. do some research before you talk rubbish, women in Islam are free to work and not only that they get to keep 100% of their own money and they have the right to their husbands money too. Yes they have to dress modestly but that’s with all religions and it’s to protect man as well as women, the niqab is not obligatory for women too. Research and learn for yourself

@hijabimami863

3 жыл бұрын

You do know that not all Muslims are from foreign countries, right? And even if they do have roots in other countries doesn’t mean that they actually go there.

Just leave both different religions out of their marriage and be atheists. It sounds like the catholic family is narrow minded. Marry for love and marriage not because of your faith and beliefs.

Or perhaps educate your parents that being a Muslim isn't the same as the version they picture in their heads. And that there's 72528 religions in the world and why would they think theirs is the only right one?

@cathalhendron3941

Ай бұрын

Their can only be one right one truth is singular

We need a follow up from this girl in a year or two ROFL.

Interfaith marriage no matter the faiths involved are ridiculously difficult. I unknowingly married an atheist & I’m a Christian. (I thought he was agnostic & so did he, he misunderstood the labels) He’s slowly coming around, but those first 4.5 years were extremely tough.

Nah, don't do it sis. It's a whole different lifestyle to adapt to. But it's your life.

Don't do it don't do it don't do it

Holy cow this is relevant to my life.

@katwilliams2950

3 жыл бұрын

I'm working towards this convo with my family.....but its not a Muslim but a girl....its gonna be fun

@manjitkapri1816

3 жыл бұрын

@@katwilliams2950 LOLLLLL don't worry it will be easier than you think.

@anneshirley9560

3 жыл бұрын

@@manjitkapri1816 Don’t give her false hope! Haha It didn’t go well for me.

Just watch “Not Without My Daughter” first with Sally Field. Then decide.

@michelleeaton6602

3 жыл бұрын

Misty F Exactly.

@cbebop5

3 жыл бұрын

Yes!

@ntmn8444

3 жыл бұрын

People don’t realize that movie happens every day in real life. All the time.

@kayann3523

3 жыл бұрын

@@ntmn8444 it is a true story

@heidi6544

3 жыл бұрын

Yes!! I just thought that!!!

My simple advice for the folks here, make a Muslim friend so you understand the faith and culture in which they are rooted in. Muslims are so diverse in practice and culture, so make a variety of Muslim friends from diverse backgrounds. You'll be surprised what you may learn. Stop getting your information off the internet, so much misinformation and hate. Get your information from actual Muslims. Until you make a Muslim friend, it is best to keep the ignorant comments to yourself.

@grod805

3 жыл бұрын

I have a ton of Muslim friends and I love them. I would not want a family member to convert to Islam. The religion is almost a cult.

@keepstriving4672

3 жыл бұрын

@@grod805 You seem like a respectful friend.

@echo5935

2 жыл бұрын

@@grod805 who are you to get to decide whats a cult

When I am given the ultimatum. I personally always go with the choice that didn't make me choose. For example: Girlfriend: "its me or the cats" Me: *picks cats* (why? cause the cats didn't make me choose)

@MacNCheeses

3 жыл бұрын

this is so true! The only exception being "Either go to rehab for your drug addiction or lose me" or something that is actually harmful to you

Theoretically Catholic… love it… I also know when to kneel down and stand up

I think parents should playing the him or us card, that is selfish. The child has not committed a crime, she just loves someone different. Support her decision or you will regret this later. Your baby needs you.

Her parents aren't practicing what they preach as Catholics if they gave their daughter and ultimatum.

If you love someone you won’t give them an ultimatum. “You should love someone in a way that they feel free” CW The parents should love the daughter this way.

I would say no I am not choosing you or him I am choosing me and my values and if me doing what’s best for ME and my free will and personal sovereignty doesn’t put a smile on your face, well mom and dad you need to rethink your values and why you’re allowing ME to be emotionally responsible for your feelings! Just so toxic. They made the choice to disown you.

15 yrs ago, i was in a similar situation. I was catholic and my huband ( then my fiance) was a Christian. My mom didnt accept my husband's values. I still got married and my mom had to accept that i became a Christian. My family comes first, its my husband and my kids. My mom still loves me and still talks to me.

@erikrohr4396

3 жыл бұрын

The Catholic/Christian (or protestant, or maybe evangelical?) Distinction is an interesting one. Would you consider yourself a Christian now? What do you think about your Mom's faith now? Thx.

@dianagarcia9265

3 жыл бұрын

@@erikrohr4396 my family and I are non denominational Christians. I no longer consider myself a catholic. To tell you the truth Eric, i never cared to follow the catholic view/ faith. I just did because i was living under my parent's roof. i felt lost and i was looking for something. Now, i follow Christ according to his Word( the bible). I choose to have a relationship with God and not just religion. I believe that God loved the world sooo much that he send his Son Jesus to die for all of our sins, and I believe that he died and rose again on the 3rd day and is sitting at the right hand of the Father. I believe that one day Jesus will come for his church. I know that I can go to God personally and ask for forgiveness of my sins anytime instead of telling a priest. I believe that God thru Jesus Christ is there for me guiding me and not having "saints" intercede for me. like i said, my mom is still catholic and she once in while does try to "talk sense into me saying that im wrong", but i know what i believe in and I stand firm. God bless u Eric. 🙏

@ntmn8444

3 жыл бұрын

It’s all Christianity.

@ntmn8444

3 жыл бұрын

@Richard Francis exactly. Even non denominational IS a denomination...of Christianity.

@dianagarcia9265

3 жыл бұрын

@Richard Francis you are entitled to your opinion. I do not see it that way.

I married in my religion for my parents and it was terrible.

Religion is fucking wack for thinking like this. Y’all there are so many religions and people are so convinced their religion is the correct one. How can someone be so sure?

@gutenbird

2 ай бұрын

Nothing to do with thinking one is right or wrong. Just the reality of a female non muslim marrying a male muslim. She will be living as a wife did a thousand years ago. No rights and no say.

I have never dated someone who my family hated so much and I feel for her. I am not a religious person per se and the men I had dated before my husband were similar. I would not date a religious person bc that would go against my habits and beliefs but I am open minded to their beliefs.

@Shaara1

Жыл бұрын

And what if you become a believer later in your life, when you already married? We don't choose faith. It's bestowed upon you. You can't do anything about it.

@firefly9838

Жыл бұрын

@@Shaara1yeah that's bullshit. I don't believe that for a second. Nobody is forced to become part of a religion. Nobody forced you to believe a 2,000 year old text. You wanted to be cool or to be accepted. Most people can't handle doing their own thing so they tell themselves "oh yeah I heard voices telling.... oh cut the crap you are too much of a sissy to push back on the narrative"

Unless he not a strong practicing Muslim, she really needs to educate herself on what she’s gonna have to change to marry him.

@gutenbird

2 ай бұрын

That doesn’t matter. You marry one who isn’t a practicing one and a couple of years later they remember their upbringing and become devout.

My dad is Catholic and he was upset when he I asked him for his blessing when when my husband and I wanted to get married. (He had never met my husband but my husband wanted his blessing). My husband then boyfriend was a Christian. We went to a non-denominational church. My dad wanted me to marry a Catholic 😑. He would not give us his blessing. This is something to ignore I was raised Catholic but my husband and I were both going to the same Church and my dad was being dumb. This lady really needs to think this over. I do not think dating someone of a do different religions is a good idea. Now she is thinking of raising her kids Muslim does she not want to do Christmas or Easter. Those where very special times of the year for me growing up even if you take the religious part out of it. It is still a special time of the year seeing my own kids experiences. She will miss that. I hope her Husband won’t take that away from her.

People in love should always listen to their families. Cause the family is assessing the situation with their brains; people in love are thinking with other body parts.

I would be very careful. Does she know what he expects of her as a muslim wife. How come Dr Delony is not warning her of this.

Always give grace.

My neighbour converted 53 years ago to a Pakiatani man. She was not religious and infact nor was her husband.lived a very normal British life Children flown the nest. She cared for her husband during his illness and Covid and he maintained her very comfortably. Now she decided to convert to Islam in spirit on her own accord. She never believed Jesus was God but couldn’t have a life without him. But she says she always had a belief in God but just didn’t practise anything. She’s happy that Jesus (and Moses) is a part of the Muslim faith, and one can not be Muslim without that, and that they believe in the miraculous conception of Mary because it’s in the Quran, the Muslim faith book. She’s very happy and sees it a win-win situation.

Those parents need to keep the door open she will need them soo n

Is he black? Odds are overwhelming. Does no one think her being white and him being black could have anything to do with it? The religion may be a bit of a scapegoat here.

I simply don’t understand how one can fool themselves into committing to a relationship where both parties are of differing world views....If I want to raise my family a traditional way, but my SO’s all about gender neutral language and open relationships, how do you think that’s gonna work out for me?

Assalamualeikum:)

At my age of 74, I feel so sad for adult sons and daughters who are compelled to please their parents.

Love all the people who fee the need to speak for this woman. Frankly I’m disappointed in Dr. D’s way of handling it. It’s subtle but his opinion is out there and he focuses more on the “consequence” of her decision rather than helping her navigate how best to handle the situation. And so many comments about her as if she is naive and will “learn the hard way” and so many comments about the fiancé. One thing Delony got right, her parents don’t get a vote. And frankly, neither does anyone else. People are just completely overlooking her happiness with this man. She’s made her choice. Just respect it and let it be.

@anthill1510

4 ай бұрын

The way she talks about this difference in believes and culture is incredibly naive. It`s clear that she hasn`t thought about what it means to live in the muslim tradition and hasn`t talked to her husbad about it. "I guess we will raise them muslim", she has no idea.

You both should open up your religious books and see how much evil is in there.

I was Baptist, my boyfriend (now husband) was Catholic, he got saved on his own before we got married. Both families were upset, I knew better than to take the chance of having a divided house because that’s unfair to children. It might be old-fashioned but 44 yrs and 5 children who grew up and followed our faith with their families is important to us.

@Shaara1

Жыл бұрын

Then he wasn't a Catholic, only baptized. If he gave it up so easily it didn't mean anything to him. A faithful Catholic who understands what he has, wouldn't wander off to any sects.

@firefly9838

Жыл бұрын

Religion is a sham

Amen!

All I know about ultimatums is don't give them!!!

I am so sorry for this woman. Bigotry is a horrible thing and people are always surprised by those who are close to them being that way. I hope she gets the courage to stand up for herself and the right thing.

@gutenbird

2 ай бұрын

It’s a lot more complex than that. My sister n law married a muslim who was extremely non practicing and laid back until they had a child. Then he became over the top fanatical. I’m friends with a bunch of Muslims and the reality is it isn’t a good idea for either one of them. Knowing something may be a bad idea isn’t bigotry.

I reverted to Islam. Then after a few years I married a Muslim. But since my husband was not in the picture when I became Muslim, he did not get blamed. My sister also reverted to Islam. She did that after marrying a Muslim man. He (my brother-in-law) got all the blame for my sisters reversion and my sister got all the blame for my reversion. My mom is not very fond of my brother-in-law and the only reason I can think of is bcs he was Muslim when he met my non-Muslim sister and that led to my sister studying Islam. He did not ask her to change religions~my sister made that choice herself. My dad wasn’t happy but he reacted better than my mom did. My mom ultimately decided it was better to have her children in her life rather than abandon them bcs they have different beliefs. And no…we don’t do things lien celebrate Christmas BUT we do (at least my family) go to my parents home for Christmas sometimes (we live out of state so not every year). We view it as spending time with family not I’m Muslim so we can’t be there at a time that is special for you. And Eid is in three weeks. I am going to put up a mini tree and decorate bcs I like how it looks and makes me feel…it’s pretty. My Muslim husband does not mind at all. (Of course, in the Muslim world…it’s full of people and people are full of their own opinions so to some, this is not okay to do and to others, it’s fine). Me? I believe intention matters. We are told so in our religion. I don’t want to be extreme where I end up hating the religion and making my kids hate the religion. I will also say it is common in Muslim families to take care of your family. Aka, mom and dad get old you take care of them, you don’t ship them out to a nursing home. One positive thing I like. Your not as likely to be abandoned by your children as they grow old and have their own families. That is considered very disrespectful.

Don't tell your kid what to believe, that's manipulating, teach them how to learn and think for themselves, and later they will decide their morals and beliefs

@gogogolyra1340

Жыл бұрын

Huh? Then what about those classes u take in school, they are no different

Always put your happiness first before other people's opinions.

@NietzscheanMan

3 жыл бұрын

If she put her happiness first she wouldn't marry a muslim over her daddy issues.

She does not have to covert to the muslim faith and her fuure kids should make io their own minds about what religion and beliefs to follow.

My muslim cousin married a Christian women. They been happily married for 28yrs. However, the kids were raised muslim and she celebrate all our muslim holidays. But has not converted to Islam. So, I think this caller needs to sit with her partner and speak openly about how she sees the future and how he sees the future and are they willing to compromise when necessary. Communication is essential.

And down the road, your mind will change. You don’t know how it will be when you actually have to make a decision. And John you thought this was really funny! Seriously?

My question to her would be - would she choose to be a Muslim even if they broke up,? If not, why not?. Also, why wouldnt he leave his parents religion and become catholic?

Dont do it! It will not end well.

@KS-cl8br

2 жыл бұрын

Seriously. It's fine to marry her. Just do premarital counseling.

Don't do it girl see the movie Not without my daughter starring Sally Field

@gutenbird

2 ай бұрын

That movie is realistic. Same thing happened to my sister n law and when the father takes the child to his own country, only way to get the child back in trick the father into returning.

So basically her family thinks she's a heretic.

I'm very disappointed in John's answer. This isn't something like buying a car and your parents' disapproval. This is her conversion into Islam which is a huge deal. The boy friend will force her to convert Some of my best friends are Muslim. Their beliefs just don't mesh well with Christianity. Islam rules very single in part of their lives. I'm super liberal, this isn't coming from a conservative person. Just being realistic

@LL-lj1kq

3 жыл бұрын

grod805 👏👏👏👏❤️

@keepstriving4672

3 жыл бұрын

You sound like a liberal trying to use Islam to fight Christianity. Muslims men can marry Christian or Jewish ladies (people of the book) without having them convert into Muslims. Sounds like you need more conversations with your Muslim friends do they can educate on Islam.

@grod805

3 жыл бұрын

@@keepstriving4672 show me when that happens in real life. How will the kids be raised?

Very informative content! I too upload similar video. 🙏

It's like she hasn't really thought about the reality of marrying a Muslim man or raising children with one of them. Like I guess we will raise our children Muslim. So... if you have a daughter do you want her raised as a Muslim? How much freedom will your husband give you? And yes I said give you because in Muslim culture he is in charge.

The Bible is very clear that faith in Christ will divide families. In this case, the parents are making it clear that God comes before everything else, including family. That's why all the family first decor bothers me in Christian homes. Like his answer on this. The divorce rate is so high with ppl if they have strong core values, including faith, that are different.. granted it doesn't sound like either of them do, but that can fluctuate over time. That said, as a Catholic, while Protestants are my brothers and sisters in Christ. Sometimes, Muslims are more reverant on topics like Mother Mary or traditional families, etc. So there may be some common ground...but not enough to make me pull down any red flags

That moving bus analogy is cool and all but what about the Westboro Baptist Church? That's an example of ppl who use that very excuse to spread hate and toxicity

Ah this explains it. She isn't really Catholic. She seems lapsed, like she doesn't know the faith, she wasn't taught about the true beauty of Catholicism. She's willing to leave and join islam and she isn't even bothering to look into her faith or understand why her parents feel that way. Why DO they love being Catholic that they gave her this ultimatum? They need to sit and have a conversation as to why she is fine turning away from Jesus forever.

This is a difficult call. It’s very important to know where one stands when it comes to faith. This can have major consequences if certain subjects are not discussed before hand

Listen to your family

I am sorry catholic and Muslim will not work, even if she is not practicing Catholicism. His family will not accept her. They have differences that won't work well

Go ahead, marry him. Welcome to third world subjugation. Good luck, you're gonna need it.

No such thing as a devote atheist...

She’s going to be sorry, that’s a promise.

@margaretkearsey6603

3 жыл бұрын

absolutely

In United States they will get divorced! They just don’t match! 😂😂😂