March 2020 Budget | Student Loan PTSD | Aja Dang
I'm Aja Dang and this is my March 2020 budget. I've been debt free for a couple months now but I guess you never really get over that fear of being broke again. I'm hoping that anxiety will get better as I complete my emergency savings fund but it seems like one day I'll wake up with no money again.
No one tells you about this feeling in those financial books... This is life after debt.
ps. I am in no way comparing what I'm feeling to those who suffer PTSD from extremely traumatic events (war/rape/abuse/etc) so please don't think that.
•BUDGET•
2020 Budget: bit.ly/2u4gqAx
2019 Budget: bit.ly/2Vmpc5F
• VIDEO MENTIONS •
North Figueroa Animal Hospital (LA): www.nfahvet.com/
B Street Vet (SD): www.bstreetvet.com/
• GET YOUR LOANS PAID OFF •
www.firstaidbeauty.com/fab-aid
• THUMBNAIL & GRAPHICS •
Elaine Zhao: bit.ly/394T78L
• ONLINE BANKING I USE •
EMPOWER: bit.ly/2oePP0t
QAPITAL: bit.ly/2FW8Hah
ALLY: bit.ly/2S2JXma
• STAY CONNECTED •
Website: www.ajadang.com
Instagram: bit.ly/IGAjaDang
Twitter: bit.ly/TweetAjaDang
Facebook: bit.ly/FBAjaDang
Podcast: bit.ly/2Yyj9fJ
Tiktok: AjaDang
Пікірлер: 383
I really thought she meant Brian couldn't make their own wedding lol
@nannibunni
4 жыл бұрын
Same! 😂😂😂
Thanks for keeping up the videos even after you paid debt. It's nice to see other people's "Life after Debt."
I do think Dave Ramsey's method works, but a lot of his ideas are fear-driven, and it could be part of why you're feeling this way. I definitely could be wrong, but even just tackling the first few steps of his method gave me anxiety. It also left me with guilt when I did spend my money, even when I was trying to take care of myself. It's not a good feeling.
@alexustann371
4 жыл бұрын
Hiedi Nichols I felt that.
@cocodakilla
4 жыл бұрын
I think it happens if you have hugeeee amounts of debt like she did. Luckily for me, after my consumer debt is gone by summer time, my student loan debt isn't huge so I will be double the minimum monthly amount and kick it after 5 years with minimal interest added each year. I won't stress myself with the student loans because I dont need to. If my debt was as big as hers then you have to go crazy at that debt.
@shirleyqiu9448
4 жыл бұрын
Hiedi Nichols I felt this way too! That’s why I wasn’t a huge fan of his method
@1stdaughter
4 жыл бұрын
Wait, is the Invisalign a form a debt?
@de5072
4 жыл бұрын
Coco Pops I didn’t have a huge amount of debt but I understand how she feels. I paid off my last student loan (10k) last week and while yes I did cry knowing it was done I had a panic attack when I thought about what comes next.
Lmao best advice ever, “No one gives a shit about you” seriously wish I could tell people this 😂 love your transparency!!
@Rocioslane
4 жыл бұрын
You can in a loving manner lol
@rayy2670
4 жыл бұрын
It's true, I tell people all the time that others are more concerned about themselves.
1. It makes so much sense you´re stressed out about your future money situation and if your situation with your mental health gets any worse PLEASE go see your doctor and get a referral to a psychologist. They can help u set/make some guidelines so you won´t be so stressed. 2. For the love of God,- do not make more videos than u can handle girl! Yes, I LOVE your videos but I would rather have u being OK and if that means u only making 1 more video this month- then that´s that!! 3. LOVE YOU and take care
Book recommendations to help with anxiety: the soul of money, happy money
@sabrinaf3519
4 жыл бұрын
Great recommendation! It‘s the best financial book I‘ve read so far (and I‘ve read A LOT of books about money and finances).
You can absolutely have ptsd from financial struggles. I grew up in poverty and I’m always having to work through triggers with therapy. Be kind to yourself and maybe talk to someone (a professional) about your anxiety. A phrase that I have written over my desk is “money is a wonderful servant but a terrible master”. Your feelings are valid and you can get through this💪
@TheKarebear666
4 жыл бұрын
That's a wonderful quote. Thanks for sharing it and your story 💜
The thumbnail is so appealing it literally boosted my mood to click on this video! The power of graphic design! 👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
@AjaDang
4 жыл бұрын
oh wow! I'll tell Elaine she's doing a great job
You get so used to having no money that when you finally start having that expendable income you’re overwhelmed with the responsibility of it!! I got so used to getting paid and sending all my money out again that when I had money I was like ‘oh shit, what do I do now??’ Don’t know if that is anything like what you’re doing through but you’re so right about the PTSD.
financial security is being able to spend, without feeling like it's negatively impacting your financial situation. hope we can all get there someday
The fears surrounding buying a house are SO real! Especially in this market.
I literally just said that the other day about no one paying attention to you when you go places alone. I have been to theme parks, restaurants and movie theaters alone. Nobody cared lol.
@Elena-er7zp
4 жыл бұрын
Samantha Eversley yeah people are so self-involved
@sstrini28
4 жыл бұрын
I took myself to Paris 2 yrs ago and before I booked it, I thought "it's weird to go there alone, Paris is for lovers"...then I was like eff it...I'm going. It was amazing and yes, nobody gives a shit about what you're doing as long as you arent hurting anyone.
Your budget videos have helped me stay on track during those times that I really want to spend frivolously or be irresponsible. I’m so glad you’re still doing this after being debt free!
Dear Aja, in the middle of the video I had to stop to write the comment, you are way too hard on yourself. 1st you payed off your debt, yay, enjoy it. It's normal to feel like you need to figure everything else financialy afterward, but road to financial literacy is hard, and you are there. Give yourself some credit. 2nd Housing, good to think about that but your are thinking about too many steps at a time, it's not like the decision needs to be done right now. You are saving money for house, that's great. Some things will need to be figured out later. You cant isolate yourself, to be sure that everything will be great decision and that you are ready for everything. 3rd Food, you work hard, and that's why you sometimes need to eat out and spend more, its because you are making more money with working than you would save if you would cook, think about it that way. Spending money on nice food even at home, is alright. You need to reward yourself that way. That's how good relation with yourself starts. Now back to video, and gjve yourself some credit and dont rush ❤️
You’re so transparent and genuine it’s truly refreshing. I think your worries are irrational but at the same time totally rational. Don’t be too hard on yourself, you’re doing amazing and if you got thru paying off your students loans you can totally get thru the worries you’re having now. Baby steps! You are so inspirational and every time I watch a monthly budget video I’m like “oh shoot I gotta get on top of my budget this month!” Thanks for sharing :)
Not that I advocate unnecessary spending, but if it makes you feel at all better, Americans actually spend proportionally less money on groceries and food than most other developed countries. Healthy food is also preventative medicine. So as long as it doesn't go to waste its fine
@de5072
4 жыл бұрын
TheLunarFire do you have a source for this? I was always under the impression we spent more on food mainly in the eating out area compared to other developed countries. I would love to read this if you have it saved!
@sarishryack6545
4 жыл бұрын
www.weforum.org/agenda/2016/12/this-map-shows-how-much-each-country-spends-on-food/ I’ve seen this data replicated but this is the first one to come up in a google search.
@kariscains5198
4 жыл бұрын
@@de5072 I have not looked at the data sourced here. But I'm an American living in the UK. And while I would say Americans eat out more, I think it's because it's comparatively a lot cheaper to eat out in America vs buy groceries and cook at home. In England I find that equation is switched. Going out feels SO MUCH more expensive than cooking at home.
@vanefreja86
3 жыл бұрын
Same in Scandinavia :)
Aja, Congrats on being Debt Free!!!! You had me exciting and motivated on my journey. I have realized I have been debt free before in my teenage years but because I was ill advices by other broke people the fear of not knowing put me in a worst situation than before. We were lied to and we as a nation are addicted to Debt and without it we feel we don’t have an identity. You’re anxiety is real. You do have the antidote which is budgeting and having goals for where your money should go. Also I love the idea of helping others to pay off their student loans. I do hope all of these plans you have put forth will prosper. Keep giving off positive vibes!
Your fears are totally valid. Big life changes often come with a period of adjustment. How you manage the adjustment is a great indicator of future success. Being resilient, insightful and continuing to set goals while also taking care of self are healthy ways to cope. P.S. I am a licensed therapist, good luck with your search for a good match for you.
I’m a few months away from paying off my student loans & it’s really important to see how others deal with the aftermath when it’s all paid off. Keep up the honesty & thanks for sharing your percentages!
@walkinmyshoes1254
4 жыл бұрын
How is it going?
Aja thank you for being so honest and open with your budget! I believe are your fears are realistic. Don’t feel bad about that. Soooo happy to hear that you paid your health insurance for the year 🎉🎉🎉 that would definitely would make me feel more secure. Keep doing you, girl! Can’t wait for the next video.
Hi Aja, Hearing you talk about your anxiety with money resonated with me so much. A few years back, i became homeless for a couple of weeks. I then was able to to scrub peoples toilets so i could have a place to stay, and on top of that found another job so i could have $10-$15 a week to spend on food and pay my ongoing medical visits. After a couple years i found a job that paid me more where i was able to even save money, but then i started to panic about money one night as i was calculating my budget. In the midst of my panic, i was like, wait, how am i panicking when i have been in the best situation ive been in years? Eventually i started therapy and learned that its SO possible that no matter how much money i make, if i continued to have what therapists call the 'poverty mindset', that we would always feel poor. I second those other comments who suggest therapy. Its not cheap, but an AMAZING investment for the quality of life you want to live. You have done so well imo, you deserve peace and joy to go along with your financial freedom!!
The stress is understandable but I so highly recommend seeing a therapist to have someone to talk to and help make the stress not be crippling ❤️❤️❤️
@AjaDang
4 жыл бұрын
trust me, I've been on the search for a therapist but I haven't found one I click with.
@laboheme125
4 жыл бұрын
@@AjaDang as much as I am a strong advocate for therapy, finding one you click with is the hardest part.
honestly i love how aja just says it how she sees it instead of "trying to be nice" when people really need a reality check like "you can't be happy for other people?" seriously!! and aja please do videos on your own pace!! your videos are better when your heart's in it, not when you're tired and stressed :) please take self care time
you are deserving of treating yourself as well. that’s the beauty of budgeting - to create more freedom over restrictions. i’m paying off my loans right now and i get frozen sometimes at night thinking about how much i have to go. but i try to take it day by day because i don’t want to lose sight of the blessings i have as well - to wake up everyday.
Medical student here were an atrocious number of debt to my name. Your channel is a sweet reminder of how possible it is to pay off big debt. Definitely understand the fear of being broke again
Girl if you don't know where you want to buy then don't commit that money yet. I mean start saving if you want but if owning property and locking yourself into a particular location doesn't align with your other life goals, then that's ok! If you haven't yet, start putting money away for retirement so you can take advantage of compound interest and set you up for success for the long run. Even if it's just like $25/week, start some sort of IRA so you have the opportunity to retire eventually. Breathe, you're doing incredible. Be proud of yourself. Keep it up!
Wow that new vet sounds amazing. God bless that place and people who work there! 🙏🏽
Hi Aja and those pursuing more financial freedom in their lives.. I’m really enjoying two podcasts at the moment - ChooseFI and AffordAnything. Super encouraging and inspiring!
No girl I totally feel the same. I'm not done with my debt yet but I'm aggressively working on it and I'm in a better financial place right now than I've been in a LONG time. But I still have the same anxieties that it's all going to crash and burn. We're not alone, just have to trust and know that we are NEVER going back. Take a breath and feel some peace.
Really appreciate your honesty in this video. I paid off my student loans back at the end of 2018 and was immediately surprised by the fact that my money worries didn't just disappear with my student loan debt. Instead they simply shifted. I went from how do I pay off this debt to how to I set up my life so that I don't go into debt again. Emergency funds, 401K increases, Roth IRA set up. I now had to think about things I was never even considering when I didn't have money, but in all seriousness I had to set up a new goal so that I wouldn't make the mistake of spending all this freed up money. I'm glad that you still do monthly budget checkup and that you still have goals for yourself. I hope that your anxieties about money go away soon. From experience I can say that it does get better.
Your videos make me feel prepared for being a adult so I’ll be going to college so I have now have a saving account and you have given me so much knowledge thank you
Girl I love you! Your realness and up front attitude is appreciated ❤️
I understand your stress Aja, it is real, don't be shy or feel bad about it! You have been through a lot and you are doing great. Keep going.
Hearing you being stressed about money and having PTSD is so valid... and makes you realize how messed up the current system is. You’ve been helping me think about capitalism a lot recently, so thank you for that.
YAASSS!!! to eating alone. I love going on solo dates. Take care of yourself! And I was disappointed that I didn't qualify, but also super excited for those who could qualify.
Omg! I have been watching your videos for awhile and had no idea you're from Hawaii! Kisses from the islands, happy you've made it through past struggles. Living in Hawaii is definitely a debt bound county. No money, lots of debt, and high prices everywhere. But so much aloha. Anything is possible don't forget!
You have such a sensitive and beautiful soul. It’s so hard to live in this world when you can FEEL everything deep in your heart. I’m also a very empty person. For me, seeing you living your best life, being the strong, assertive person you are (as it seems from your videos) really gives me hope that it is possible to hustle and take care of one’s self while caring about other and lose nothing from your sensitivity. Hope that makes any sense
@AjaDang
4 жыл бұрын
I really appreciate this comment. Thank you so much
Aja, you WILL NOT mess up your finances. You know better and can do better now. 🙌 I payed off my student loans last year but now I’m back in debt because of medical bills... even though I maxed out my HSA. *sigh I will persist and give your First Aid Beauty vid a thumbs up!
This makes total sense! It's all new territory. But you're doing it! You have the knowledge, the work ethic, the drive, and you're killing it! I understand this fear though. You can do it!
The fear of being broke is real and terrifying
You are so conscious and self aware it is BEAUTIFUL!
I totally understand your anxiety. While I am still working on baby step 2, I just got married and am asking myself some of the same questions you are about where to settle down and buy a home. It's hard and those are big questions! It is totally reasonable you are having an anxious response. Something that has helped me is intentionally telling myself to take everything one day at a time. I hope you get some relief girl, you deserve it.
Something about February also gave me the worst stress and anxiety ever. I’m graduating college and the stress of where I’m going to move and ESPECIALLY what job I’m going to have has been a nightmare. Your worries are extremely valid about where you are going next in your life. I hope that March treats you better because that was rough. ❤️
@AjaDang
4 жыл бұрын
post-graduation is always a stressful thought. Congrats on graduating!
I don’t get it either. I don’t live in a city and one vet wanted to charge $400 to spay a cat (girls are more expensive 🙄 to get fixed). Instead we called around and was able to get her spayed, microchipped and all her shots done for $130 45 mins away.
@adamross4295
4 жыл бұрын
Buy bird
@visi7891
4 жыл бұрын
maybe the vet is part of a low-cost program and gets some funding another way? or is 'controlled'/employed by the low-cost funding program.
This may seem random and weird but I love that you are sharing this. Your fear, happiness, success, and anxiety; you've accomplished such a big goal in being debt free!! Now its like your body, and mind is like... ok ok ok... let's prepare for the next thing. I def believe what you feeling is normal in relation to you now thinking about your next step and what makes sense for you and your needs :).
Love, I recently started watching you and I love your content! :) But I sense that you need to relax and bring in some positive reinforcement in your life because the negative forces (e.g. news, depression, homeless, hunger, COVID-19, etc) is starting to eat at you. I am glad that you are aware and doing your best to help and that is amazing! However, you cannot truly help others if you are feeling defeated at every step. Thank you for your content, you are amazing and I will continue to watch more :)
Buying a house can be extremely stressful, and even just thinking about buying a house can be very stressful. I recommend trying counseling. If you find a good counselor, it can be very helpful. Wishing you all the best Aja! Cheers.
Look at all those orange boxes! Amazing! :) In terms of the student loan PTSD, I totally get you. I paid off $10k in personal debts and I think the fact is, even if I'm in the positive now I don't feel financially secure yet. And maybe since you have savings goals that you are working on aggressively, you do as well? I hope that as you feel like you have all of your emergency savings and sinking funds accounted for that the anxiety settles down! (That's what I'm hoping for me!)
@AjaDang
4 жыл бұрын
I am hoping that once my emergency fund is complete, I'll feel better. If not, there's a deeper issue here.
Hey girlll, I just wanted to let you know that you are the reason that I started budgeting. Since then, I have paid off my car and taken on my student loans. Thank youuu for opening my mind to this whole financial world. Next game plan is to do my OWN business and quit my fulltime job. ONE DAY AT A TIME.
@AjaDang
4 жыл бұрын
yes sis! Congrats on going through the steps!
I paid off my student loan a little over 2 years ago and for a while I had PTSD too. Sending you virtual hugs!!!
@AjaDang
4 жыл бұрын
xoxo
@aelinluna3434
4 жыл бұрын
PTSD can't be cured, unfortunately. Best of luck coping in the future xx You can do it.
Thank you for sharing your honesty on experiencing PTSD from paying off your student loans. A lot of people don’t talk about how life is after paying off debt. As for people complaining about your recent video on a company paying off student loans, they just have to accept that not every opportunity is for everyone
Hi Aja! Love the percentages. I think it's amazing that you are keeping your financial privacy. I was watching this video earlier and my boyfriend said, "She's the most honest and real KZreadr."
I feel ya. Living in Seattle, want to buy a house but the struggle to get the 20% down payment is real. When I will finally get there I could just move back to the Midwest and pay cash for a house.
Hey Aja, I saw your comments where you said you haven’t found a therapist you vibe with and I just wanted to let you know that psychology today has a tool where you can find therapists in your area that accept your insurance which may be helpful for you!! You’ve worked so hard, I’m so sorry you’re feeling this way 🥺
Your honesty is so refreshing! Love your style 😘
I have ptsd from growing up poor (dad died when I was 7, income was slashed in half, my mom was a newly single mother of two girls blablabla) and I felt you on the fear of being broke. It’s something that keeps me awake and influences all of my decisions. I’m only 20 years old and my boyfriend and I are setting up a plan so we can support my mother by the time she retires (I’ll be 28 and he’ll be thirty). It’s extremely stressful but with the help of mental health professionals and advisors at school I’ve been able to figure it out.
Thank you for sharing this. Love how honest you are
Yea it's rational fear!!! You are making great choices. You're planning for your family's..trust your intuition. You are doing great. Maybe think of vision board and find all the elements you are wanting while you're waiting. Pace yourself and self care. Keep up great work!! You are awesome
Same boat girl, I have so much anxiety about going back to that constant stressing about money that it's affecting my health. Trying to stay hopeful!
You are so kind, genuine, and have such a beautiful heart, Aja.
great video as always, and thanks for the apple numbers tip! I'm going to input my feb budget now to see how I did!
I am so sorry, but look at you now! I wish I would’ve seen this before my other post asking you about making lip balm for my granddaughters anxiety and stress from her college stress! 🙏🏼😊
Saw this video in my recommended. 3 minutes in and I’m already subscribed.
@AjaDang
4 жыл бұрын
I appreciate you!
Hahaha I so love your realness Aja. I created my finance journal this weekend for a “bigger picture” of my debts and wanted to thank you for being an inspiration, and continuing to do these videos, because they really are motivation to see where my life can go without debt holding me down. Keep being you!!
You’re not alone dealing with the trauma that student loans gave you! When I paid it off, I don’t want to owe anything anymore (esp with interest). You’re taking preventative measure and controlling your funds. 👏🏻 is did the same! Remind yourself that your plans on saving and where to navigate your funds is a GOOD PROBLEM to have.
@lizitis
4 жыл бұрын
Just a personal recommendation, I would highly encourage you and Brian to see a couples counselor BEFORE getting married and engaged. Seeing one minimizes divorce by 30%. Top reasons (statistically) that couples divorce are: 1) money 2) sex 3) child rearing Seeing one helped us hashed out old shit that we buried. And we learned how to effectively reconcile, forgave and closed that chapter. 💕 When we first got married, I made 3x more than my husband. Now I make 6x more than my husband after 5 yrs of marriage. Yes, your girl hustles! lol I knew my job/career paid more than his but I didn’t expect it to be THAT high. I was honestly disappointed later on bc of he didn’t reveal his true income initially. He vaguely said that he worked “full time” making “$x/hr”. So I did the math and the number to me was fair. However, after we got married and I checked his receipts, turned out his salary was HALF of what I calculated due to his hours getting cut. Lesson learned: CHECK HIS RECEIPTS! 🧐 Lol
@lizitis
4 жыл бұрын
Furthermore, this led to resentment, because he didn’t meet my expectations and I felt tricked. 😔 It’s hard to talk to my peers about this bc I do want to protect his dignity and embarrassment of his low income. Yet I felt alone bc in my community of friends, no one is driven like me in becoming debt free.
Omg I qualify!!! I’m going to apply and PRAY I can win to get my loans paid off. Omg what a great initiative.
Fear is the destroyer. You’ll figure everything out. 🙌🏻
Your debt free journey story on Dave Ramsey debt free scream brought me here, Thank you. As i binge on your videos. Hope to see what you do next now that you are free.
I love your new thumbnails!
I really love these financial videos. I'm not even done paying off student debt, but the amount of anxiety money causes me is horrible. I feel like I'll never have a paid off house, a decent retirement savings, etc unless I keep working >100 hrs a week like I am now for debt pay off.... and I'm really burnt out.
You have a big heart! You can always add more giving to your budget. no shade either way! I’m just thinking about how all millionaires seem to say that giving is the best part about having a lot of money :) you crushed it this week!! Good job 👍 you earned everything and you work so hard
@AjaDang
4 жыл бұрын
yes you're very right about the giving
Ajaaaaa! I’m still at baby step 2, but I have all those fears that you mentioned, moreso cause I currently live in Hawaii. Adulting. Is. Hard. AF.
Omg I’m so happy I just found you. That is exactly what I tell my husband no one cares
As soon as the emergency is started and padded up, the anxiety will decrease. I felt the same way. I also did what you did and pay some of my bills for the entire year, electricity, car insurance, cell phone, etc.
Not the subject of this video but you are shining !!! you look really healthy even though you said you are stressed thoses days ! you are doing amazing on your budget, good luck ! it always motivate me to watch your video to keep up with my budget !
@NA-zx2po
4 жыл бұрын
Also my boyfriend and I spend a big chunk of our budjet in food and like the others have already said in the comment , food is health ! so it should be important to invest don't worry about it
Hey Aja! Your videos make my day! Can you pls do a video on tips for first-time dog owners/ summarizing your experiences with dog medical costs and insurance and adoption?
Some vets get federal and state subsidies in order to provide services for people who would otherwise neglect their animals.. but it depends on the quality of care your receiving, so if they are cheaper and nice and care for your dogs then 🤷🏻♀️
Hey Aja, for the money anxieties and fears, I’d highly recommend Tosha Silver’s book « It’s Not Your Money »- really helpful to help turn around your mindset around money & allow you to feel more at ease/abundant. Hope this helps 😉✌🏽
As someone who worked in a veterinary dentistry practice that seems so extraordinarily low especially in CA. I had people all the time go "why do you charge so much more than the other vets??" Well one, everyone can set their own prices and that's up for interpretation. Someone in Los Angeles is gonna cost more because their clientele/demographic can afford it. I think what set our practice apart is that our Dr was board-certified, our techs were dentistry specialized, our anesthesia protocol was not cookie-cutter and was tailored to each patient, and we did things that some GP vets don't usually do like full-mouth radiographs which takes up a lot of anesthesia time. If you have a dog who has previous dental concerns then you want radiographs. It evaluates the whole tooth from root to tip. Some vets simply clean the teeth and let the patient be on their way, but there can be infection, bone loss, a broken jaw, you name it and you're going to be back in there or to a specialist. Here's the thing: This feels worse because there isn't health insurance for pets like there is for humans. You have to pay up front and then file a claim and hope for the best with pet insurance. It is super frustrating, I will give you that, but the veterinary field is very under paid for what people do. The LA vet is probably the only one who has a real quality of life because their business is actually getting a return on their work and I'm hoping their taking care of their employees too because of it. It's a very complicated subject. Trust me. I had to go to nursing school after 15 years working with animals, because I was simply no longer happy living paycheck to paycheck after being told every day we were money grubbing. It weighs heavy on the soul. But now I make way more in two weeks, than I did on a really good month in the veterinary field with OT, and nurses don't get paid enough for what they do lol.
@lilxbx2010
4 жыл бұрын
Ahhh I’ve been in the vet field for 6 years and I relate to this so much! Everything said here is the truth and well said. As an RVT we do NOT make the prices and the work we do on animals costs just as much as human medicine only your insurance sees the itemized receipt, not you. Quality care is much better than a cheap visit, I promise you!
I appreciate you still doing these videos. We don't need your numbers. Yay! Brian.
It's definitely not stupid, money is stressful af and it's your body keeping you from feeling the debt stress again. It's just learning to trust your consistent savings contributions!
My boyfriend and I do the same thing with weddings. If it is my friend getting married, I pay. If it is his friend getting married, he pays. Of course we have mutual friends but the friendship started somewhere.
I LOVE HOW VULNERABLE AND HONEST YOU ARE! NEW SUBSCRIBER
Girl, your fears are totally rational. I totally get where your coming from. You are a prepper and have now forced yourself to be a professional adult. Pat yourself on the back. I think choosing where you want to raise your future children is probably one of if not THE most stressful decisions in a person's life. Your whole life is about to change forever! I say keep talking through it and perhaps consider a therapist or counselor? These are difficult times and you may need a third set if ears after yourself and your man.
@aja dang I can totally relate. Student loan PTSD is legitimate. You should consider working w/ a therapist to treat the PTSD/anxiety. Although you got rid of the debt, the anxiety symptoms are still lingering. I'm a therapist and I also have personal experience with this. Happy to offer my support virtually. Take care. - Cyrell
I don't if you've watched this on the homeless crime crisis but "Seattle is Dying" is a good find on KZread.
Aja praying over you 🙏💕
Love you Aja!
TOTALLY agree about the vet situation! We just rescued two puppies, now about 5 months old, so we needed to get them fixed. We called a local vet and they said it would be $275 for the male and $295 for the female. We called another vet/clinic about 20 minutes away and for BOTH dogs to get fixed, nails trimmed, rabies shots, city tags, and microchipped it was... wait for it.. $215 TOTAL!! What?! It would have been closer to $1,000 for all of those things at the other vet.. #IDontGetIt
Graduated in December with only $4k of student loans and I feel you on the fear. I’m just so scared to spend any money, I’m so used to budgeting so much to pay my way through college that now spending money on anything for myself stresses me out
I’ve been experiencing a lot of anxiety around money and debt as well. I recently got a job that pays me well enough to move out (still living at home). I was ready to sign a lease but my dad convinced me to wait and look into getting a condo instead. I talked with a loan officer and I do qualify, but the amount I’m able to pay per month is on the lower end (it’s still a lot of money, but once you factor in HOA, insurance, etc.) it leaves me with places I don’t love and ones that are in areas that I don’t necessarily want to live in. My dad thinks I should wait and continue living with him until I’m able to afford more, but he’s so messy and he lives a bit further out from my work, so I’m spending an hour and a half a day commuting (round trip.) I’m trying to be patient and wait and see if a nice place pops up, but I don’t think it’ll happen.
@AjaDang
4 жыл бұрын
why don't you find a place you'd like to live and figure out how much your monthly cost would be then save up a couple months worth of rent for that. I think that would be a good way to show your dad you can live on your own and feel good financially about living on your own.
@fairyfreak1
4 жыл бұрын
Aja Dang Thanks for answering! Sorry, I realized my original comment wasn’t clear. The reason my dad wants me to wait is because he thinks renting isn’t a good idea as you’re kind of throwing away money and not investing in something that you will later have equity in. I just don’t think it’s something that can happen for me anytime soon, and I’m not willing to live at home for years ):
@betsywilliams3666
4 жыл бұрын
@@fairyfreak1 My advice then is to move out and sign a lease. Then, set up a budget with a goal of buying a house, or condo in the next few years and other financial goals that you may have.
@AjaDang
4 жыл бұрын
@@fairyfreak1 honestly, I get where he comes from, but it's unrealistic to believe that *everyone* can afford to buy a house. I've been renting for 12 years and while it would've been nice to save up and buy a house, living with my parents into my 30s wouldve killed me. I agree with what Betsy said. Move out, set up a budget and save up for a downpayment. (did you message me on Instagram? someone asked the same question)
@benny88cups
4 жыл бұрын
Taylor V my parents also thought renting was a waste of money. They advised me to save up to buy a house. However, I badly wanted to be on my own. Plus, owning a house can be expensive due to maintenance repairs, taxes, and insurance. Renting is a better option if you don’t plan to stay in a location for a long time
It is totally rational Aja, my husband and I are going through the same process . We have a son too. We live in Bay Area . I can feel why you are so stressed .
You are slaying with the beautiful thumbnails
Yes, LOVE the graphs!!!
Ramit Sethi (who I get is not everyone's cup of tea, but I enjoy his work), talks about this a lot. The mental switch from "omg I'm crawling out of debt" to being on the flip side where you're out of debt and the ramifications of the stress. He has a few articles on money fears that might be worth the read! I had to find some good resources because even though I'm climbing out I've noticed on the months where everything is going really well, there was this underlying panic that made NO SENSE. The PTSD of negative net worth is REAL. Much
@coffeeorrum
4 жыл бұрын
Some background context: www.cosmopolitan.com/uk/entertainment/a21590132/alfie-deyes-lived-off-one-pound-video-reactions/
@AjaDang
4 жыл бұрын
so I started watching a reupload about Alfie's video and he's just being super ignorant. I'm not surprised it caused such an issue. I watched 2 minutes and was already annoyed and turned it off.. It was clearly done for fun without even understanding how difficult it is to eat on that amount of money.
@coffeeorrum
4 жыл бұрын
@@AjaDang Your take on it would definitely be interesting to see! I love the social issues you bring to light through these financial videos.
I love paying ahead!! Love this video!!
Hey @Aja Dang! What app / software did you use for your budget Pie chart?
@AjaDang
4 жыл бұрын
Numbers
@SuyinOng
4 жыл бұрын
@@AjaDang Thanks so much! I love your honesty and your tangible care for people and animals alike. Thank you for inspiring and uplifting so many of us ♡
Aja is so me when I'm in my 30s having a conversation with myself about the best place to raise children and where to buy a house hahah
Have you ever looked into the YNAB budgeting software? I think their tool and 4 rules approach to budgeting might help you ease your anxiety :)
OH and I really appreciate the graphing you do for budgets, my other beliefs about money are, you can earn it, or inherit, I have to know where it goes. Spending is done with a card for me, rarely have cash, so when I do, that dollar is not a dollar. I looked up this morning how much a Coke was, one said .99 another 1.25. So if you spend it right away there's nothing to show for it, save that, do what you do by keeping track of what you want, pretty soon a dollar is 100.00.