I worked for Blizzard back in 2007 in support for 6 months (GameMaster for WoW). None of our managers ever played WoW nor were they familiar with video games at all. One of the managers was even outspoken against video games. He often said he will never let his children play video games because it robs them their creativity and that instead he'd rather play 20 hours of Dungeons & Dragons than 2 minutes of WoW. I witnessed the same behavior in other big tech and gaming companies throughout my career. It was quite an eye opening experience to witness that many employees within big companies who are not technical and work in a management position, often don't use or care about their own products.

@ozturkberkayy

18 күн бұрын

That's why AAA games nowadays are garbage. Almost all great games started off by a bunch of nerds who loves video games (like Ultima Online, Diablo etc.) Now though, it's different...

@yourlocalhuman3526

17 күн бұрын

@@ozturkberkayy that and because parent companies want video games to fail on purpose so that they can sell them off for quick money for investors

@agentgreen3790

17 күн бұрын

I've worked in tech for 20 years. Every time the company hires a non technical manager to manage technical people, I start looking for a new job. I started recently managing technical people and finally understand why bad decisions and unrealistic timelines get pushed onto employees: managers that don't have technical skill are incompetent and unable to fully understand problems.

@chavzone

17 күн бұрын

One of my colleagues used to work for Blizzard too! She was there more recently (within 10 years) and said it wasn't even the sexism that made her move on (though it was really bad), she said what was way worse was the way they worked them all raw with unreasonable hours and terrible conditions. Tbh this is a systemic issue for way more than just the videogame industry. Business schoolers and the senior management caste know the price of everything and the value of nothing, so it's no wonder that the actual artistic and cultural merit of games, music, cinema and TV are suffering at the hands of Josh Doe and his cult of the dollar. When everything is just a cost-benefit analysis, we inevitably end up in a race to the bottom: the most insipid, lukewarm, diluted product possible, delivered at the lowest possible price, to the widest possible audience that is only just barely, barely palatable enough for the consumer to pull out their wallet and buy it. The worst thing is when people falsely attribute this to DEI and progressive movements. No, that's unrelated, that's the marketing deparment deciding to capitalise on pinkwashing their corporation. Rainbow spraypaint isn't the issue. It's the economics of it. We're minmaxing society, and it's hell.

@Therealpro2

17 күн бұрын

to be fair as an avid wow player, i woudnt let my kids play wow either

"I have never used our product" accurate

@XDarkGreyX

18 күн бұрын

Is there a Diablo joke here I wonder

@JeremyAndersonBoise

18 күн бұрын

Emotional damage, not a joke.

@PhilippBlum

17 күн бұрын

It's not even funny any more. This is too real . . .

@tobias3581

17 күн бұрын

The founders of a product I built didn’t use the product for at least the first year 😂 the product was their core business income!

@anthonybarnes

17 күн бұрын

So real

"politics over progress, processes over logic, emotions over process" - the base. the essence of any enterprise.

@monad_tcp

17 күн бұрын

In the enterprise you have to choose what you are going to lose. Ethics or Hope or Sanity, you start with ethics and hope and sanity, but you can only keep 2 of them. I lost all my hope in one job, then I regained it and lost all my sanity in another job. Then I regained it and now I shove down ethics on the drain, I didn't create this stupid game. I am not sane and hopeful, without any ethics ! Either way they take your soul. (maybe I really lost it all and have no hope, sanity or ethics anymore, such is the life)

@blueghost3649

16 күн бұрын

@@monad_tcpprofile picture checks out

@jna6536

14 күн бұрын

Too fuckin real lol

@DR_1_1

13 күн бұрын

It's some curse on humanity, it's not that enterprises are doing this because they are intrinsically evil, but it's the only way to succeed in life...

@PrincessKushana

Күн бұрын

@@monad_tcp I stood my ground on all 3 and got fired.

“I’m not saying they know what they’re doing, I’m just saying I really don’t care.” Honestly, based.

The constant "I don't have access." "Make sure you get access." Is too fucking real. I have been waiting over 2 months to gain access to a Microsoft dashboard to do a part of my job. Damn agile environment

@kugeltmg

18 күн бұрын

The access request has to go through 6 different departments. All of which are disorganized, underfunded, and bloated with nonsense (aimed at appeasing VPs); and none of which have any incentive to approve your request.

@geesysbradbury3211

18 күн бұрын

that's not agile. agile is dead. it has been eaten by egomaniac bureaucrats and what they shat out is what we now call "agile".

@ImperialFool

18 күн бұрын

I did a corporate internship where I had nothing to do for 2 weeks because I was waiting for database permissions.

@MEMUNDOLOL

18 күн бұрын

over 2 payed months

@Salantor

17 күн бұрын

Corporations are great at burning money.

"We have a tool to consolidate our documents... my downloads folder" So accurate

@JetJockey87

16 күн бұрын

Also "We can't expand the infrastructure, I'm already used to Trello"

@aerialsnack

13 күн бұрын

This one actually hurt me when he said it because... I mean... we've all been there...

@strangecalibur

9 күн бұрын

Beware, young Padawan. Politics over progress leads to stagnation. Processes over logic leads to inflexibility. Emotions over processes leads to chaos. And OKRs over all... that is the path to the dark side of management.

"I'm gonna issue a Jira ticket, but I'll send it by email... so you will forget." God damn you, product manager.

@yashaswikulshreshtha1588

13 күн бұрын

i don't understand why do they do it though? Like aren't things supposed to be smooth or something?

@mike200017

10 күн бұрын

He could have added: "I'm gonna ignore all Jira tickets or bug reports not filed by me, and in three months I'm gonna present, to upper management, the handful of irrelevant Jira tickets that I created and buried, and pretend that was all the work that was done or had to be done this quarter." I've learned that the best strategy as a developer is to make sure about 1 week before some sort of quarterly review to go through all the irrelevant and trivial tickets filed by product / project managers and do them (which is usually very quick and easy) to keep everyone happy and off your back so you can do the real work. You don't want to do them as soon as they are filed, though, because that will just bring more irrelevant work your way. And if you had to hack the feature in and it later gets in the way of other things, you can just remove it and I guarantee you no product manager will ever notice it's gone.

The first sentence "I identify problems in the project early .. and silence them." Gold!

"I get paid to remind the engineers of that" epic

scarily accurate "nobody has a clue what we're doing"

I’m surprised this video upload made it past corporate security.

@konberner170

16 күн бұрын

He told an worker that they needed to check with corporate security. This obviously doesn't apply to him.

@James-nd2yk

16 күн бұрын

I'm not surprised it went past security...

@practical-dreamer

14 күн бұрын

@@James-nd2yk clarification: I’m surprised cyberSec gave their blessing for this video to be uploaded given our organizations data classification policy…

I swear, this YT channel is Dilbert for a modern world. Insanely accurate. I don't get a salary, I get pain compensation.

@adogmn

17 күн бұрын

Dilbert without all the racism

@TheBashar327

16 күн бұрын

@@adogmn , Dilbert never had any racism. Nice try, comrade.

@ellielikesmath

15 күн бұрын

​@@TheBashar327 dilbert has become tainted with racism due to the author's outspokenly racist views.

@TheBashar327

15 күн бұрын

@@ellielikesmath , the Dilbert's author's views are not racist taken in full context. There's more racism coming from the Left the past few years- do you call that out. You can't live inside your little bubble trying to speak into existence a fantasy. Try again, comrade.

@TheBashar327

15 күн бұрын

@@ellielikesmath , the author's views are not racist if you understood the context of them. No more than any black person talking about "white America". Even black people have commented the same and many have agreed with Adams. There's more credibility to President Joe Biden and Justice Sotomayor being racists than Scott Adams. Try looking at the world with a critical adult mind rather than a child's mind spoonfed on what to think.

Remember kids, the less you work, the more you'll earn.

@rokker333

18 күн бұрын

Not knowing creates leisure time.

@XDarkGreyX

18 күн бұрын

The more certificates the more you are entitled to do little

@grimonce

17 күн бұрын

Especially if you compare it to the effort made... xD

@Spoonbringer

17 күн бұрын

To be fair I know some of managers who work long hours. I'm not sure what they do and we would probably be better off if they were all fired, but they do put in hours.

@michalsvihla1403

17 күн бұрын

I see you were inspired by Nvidia marketing :)

"We define the requirements at the beginning of the project. Changes come in through change-requests. We do have the agile manifesto hanging on the wall, so to me it sounds like agile." Imma hang _that_ on the wall, right under the agile manifesto.

The fact that I didn't realize it was a joke initially when he said, "I don't have any new ideas that's a different department", because I've worked in several businesses where that is quite literally the case made me sit back and stare at the ceiling for a bit.

@Kagotza

Сағат бұрын

first time I saw this guys videos I also thought this is real and only just veeery slightly odd

"I barely know the names of most of the people on our team" accurate

"we did not meet our OKRs this quarter, we need to change our OKRs". Just came out of a company where this was actually the case.

@GSBarlev

18 күн бұрын

Pretty sure *every* company that practices SAFe ends up doing this. I worked for a company that spent millions on agile trainings, millions more on switching us all to SAFe... and then fired every single agile delivery lead.

@Eagle3302PL

18 күн бұрын

@@GSBarlev Let me guess, the CTO is a Gen X career salesman that has never worked in tech? That's the case in the little slice of hell I am in now.

@GSBarlev

18 күн бұрын

@@Eagle3302PL This company's culture very much is business analysts and consultants all the way up to the top. McKinsey, Deloitte, Booz-Allen... very much revolving doors when it comes to leadership's prior stints.

@gorak9000

17 күн бұрын

I work at the company that invented OKRs, and they just brought back in OKRs a couple of years ago - it's the stupidest waste of time I've ever seen in my entire life

@NNokia-jz6jb

17 күн бұрын

What is OKRs?

"The engineers and customers use the product so I don't have to" - Every PM ever

@jankoodziej877

17 күн бұрын

Haha, engineers using the product, good one.

@Tuckerslam

9 күн бұрын

@@jankoodziej877 He meant as a punishment.

"One must not be predictable" this destroyed me it's so accurate

Not the fucking Teams "incoming call" sound 😭

@sylvan186

18 күн бұрын

Traumatizing sound...

@nocturne6320

17 күн бұрын

@@sylvan186 The morning stand-up humiliation ritual sound

@ahmedexmor

17 күн бұрын

Haha brilliant and sad 😢​@@nocturne6320

@darksidedevil2

17 күн бұрын

That got me off guard !! So rude !!!

@DobromirManchev

17 күн бұрын

You can actually change it, i found out that recently. It helps with mental health

"This was a management decisions and I will not question it... I am not saying they know what they are doing, I am just saying I really don't care"

“I take in 9 hours of work toxicity every day - show me an AI that can do that” BRILLIANT 😂

Patagonia jacket, check

@alkumhcounseling8634

18 күн бұрын

I'm always dressed to jog to the office, but I like to stay ready to pivot in case I want to traverse a glacier

@redkeyspoke

17 күн бұрын

Ok, but is his name Chris?

“Downloads” folder for consolidating the documents 😂

I remember on my first job talking to a manager about Agile. I complained about how nobody was implementing it correctly and that everything was cascade with a mask of Agile. He just looked at me quizzically and said "what do you mean? We have been doing Agile this whole time. We divide our problems into 2 week sprints!" I just sipped my coffee and forgot why I was even complaining.

@alilakhwaira

7 сағат бұрын

I snort-laughed at this.

@Ikbeneengeit

2 сағат бұрын

When you plan your waterfall tasks in two-week chunks, it becomes ✨Agile✨

JIRA

@aniblaze

18 күн бұрын

Also loved the “Mmmmmmmicrosoft”

@BB-te8tc

17 күн бұрын

Repeat after me: Atlassian Atlassian Mmmmicrosoft Salesforce

@Unga_Bunga

17 күн бұрын

KZread added a "Translate to English" under your comment for me. When I click it, the text doesn't change, at all. JIRA

@pawemotylski9278

16 күн бұрын

@@Unga_Bunga processes over logic

I love the way the dude is speaking into the pic without listening to the earphone

I‘m gonna take the transcription of this video and insert random quotes in my conversations. Nobody will notice.

"Miro? Sounds like a virus to me" 😅

@DS-nv2ni

18 күн бұрын

Well it's kind of. Many freaks now like to use it "to visually organize", but it's a waste of time, by having it in the company pushes people to make all sort of unnecessary graphs, presentations and whatever, subtracting even more time from what really matters (designing into detail and developing the product).

"28.3 million? that sounds like a made up number. i'm sure you can do it for much less. 1 million. i'm sorry that's all we have right now. this is a lie, we have infinite money" since i work for a government org now, i expect any budget discussions to go like this

@nonamehere1626

16 күн бұрын

Gov orgs are king at it, between the embezzlement and the insane amount of paperwork needed to justify every cent, you'll get that vibe all the time.

@segarallychampionship702

16 күн бұрын

@@nonamehere1626 exactly, someone at the finance ministry comes up like "yeah here's your yearly budget, it's fucking nothing, we gotta slash expenses somehow" and then the person goes out to buy another ivory backscratcher for themselves as another piece of plaster falls down, that is precisely the experience i am having

MMMMMmmmmmmmMicrosoft

This is triggering a huge PTSD episode for me

"I can build the entire app with Excel" PMs loving the flex on what they can't do

@Langeta-kun

16 күн бұрын

They're really really good with excel though

"I'm not responsible for the process, I'm just executing it" 💀

“I barely mastered Trello” 😂😂☠️

omg the CONSTANT access issues....😂

"My computer blocks figma links" 🤣

Yes I have to make a power point every quarter lol you nailed all of this with key words

We don't need Notion. We have a tool to consolidate all our documents. My Downloads folder.

@grvndkmr

16 күн бұрын

I'm ded

We need a scrum master one with meetings about the meetings we had about last week's meetings to set the agendas of the upcoming meetings so the team can agree our definitions of done. Daylies that we can talk about how sick their cat was and retros to talk about what we should stop and why retros aren't working. Explaining how we break work into incomprehensible blocks because we need to sprint to a finish line that isn't a finish line, where the finish line moves and the race keeps changing. And if a dev team is successful but is too large we break it up into smaller unproductive teams as it's agile... I may be suffering PTSD... Post traumatic scrum disorder

@Komeuppance

17 күн бұрын

Why are most scrum masters useless... I don't understand.

@mertzanakia

17 күн бұрын

this should be the top comment

@Puschit1

15 күн бұрын

@@mertzanakia Not really because Kai already did two of those, "Interview with an Agile Coach - Sprint1" and -Sprint 2. It's even with the same character, "Josh Doe".

@Hiro2k10

15 күн бұрын

Sick cat got me, this week IRL stand-ups had it lol

@Ikbeneengeit

2 сағат бұрын

This sounds like us, except the scrum masters were too expensive so we got rid of them 😂😂

interview with professional time waster

@BoraHorzaGobuchul

16 күн бұрын

On the one hand, yes. On the other hand, get rid of him and see how far the other time waters manage to get without him...

"I align stake holders, various cross functional teams, listen to their needs and requirements... And silence them." 😂😂😂 Top Tier Product Management.

"I could build the entire app with Excel." I'm currently converting Excel sheets to an app. FML.

@WillDelish

17 күн бұрын

Thats a next year project for me! Would been this year, but a team said they’d do it for us without knowing what we did or requirements. I told boss well, delaying this a year helps me & not our fault. 6m in, this team finally ask us for requirements. 3 weeks later they gave up 😂 (they go’n build for someone else)

@adhalianna

17 күн бұрын

I have seen an excel sheet that was basically an almost complete back-office solution for an e-commerce platform. I think it might have been only missing the possibility to send emails. It worked like a dedicated GUI with menus, views, etc. I think it was built by a single person. I started to wonder whether Excel might be the best tool for prototyping software.

@eckard9597

17 күн бұрын

@@adhalianna I did that for an IMS. Now I'm working out my plan to build it into a webapp :D

@tunesfortoons6507

17 күн бұрын

​@@adhaliannaExcel, you have your database right there. Your gui. Your formulas are the back-end. No need for apis. Security and authorisation? -> protected fields. VBA is the perfect design language. I swear this could be a sketch on this channel.

@PaulSpades

17 күн бұрын

@@adhalianna Ever since Excel got VBA (30 years ago), it became a complete and comprehensive RAD environment. Not only that, but most of the VBA scripts can just be moved to a new VB6 project, if you want to make it a real application. Easy, fast, streamlined. It's barely any work, you spend more time arranging buttons on forms. Most people just don't learn how to use it, your example sounds like a good exception.

Billions. Billions are spent. On this.

@PavelHenkin

15 күн бұрын

Nah.. trillions. This is management, at large!

@csibesz07

9 күн бұрын

Didn't you know, the future of humanity is: managment. kzread.info/dash/bejne/qJmOt8GumpzeYco.html

I worked with a CTO that was the literal embodiment of this, except worse. Everything was Power BI this, Power BI that, but when I had an issue with Power BI he had no clue how to navigate it. His time at the company ended like this: Me on Friday: Can you get me access to this? I just need these roles in Microsoft Azure under this subscription and project. Him: Sure, I'll get that to you by Monday! Also him: Texts the CEO on Sunday night "I'm out, peace" 6 Months of work lost because we're locked out of Azure

Waiting for the vim ex-faang engineer to react to this

@MarcLucksch

18 күн бұрын

He won’t understand it, he never experienced this life. If he would understand, he would talk differently about agile. Poor guy has no reference..

@Salantor

17 күн бұрын

Poor or lucky, I am not sure which one.

@stoffni

17 күн бұрын

Excuse me... Neovim!

@AGLubang

16 күн бұрын

Probably never even heard about Power Automate, Tableau and stuff...

@jaydee499

15 күн бұрын

They would wonder why the company hasn't completely refactored its code to implement some unecessary performance optimization using a cheeky novel algorithm they memorized off leetcode.

I put the video on the agenda for next week!

1:35 "We didn't hit our quarterly OKRs, so let's change our OKRs" so accurate :)

"It's all in SharePoint" 💀

@3DGladiator

17 күн бұрын

fucking SharePoint ☠

@AGLubang

16 күн бұрын

Then "You need permissions to access this site". "I'd like access, please."

@MetalheadAndNerd

10 күн бұрын

​@@AGLubangAsk any site collection owner if they know where these requests for access are waiting for them and no-one will know.

0:04 genuinely surprised that this project manager knows what a pixel is... this is the kind of technical expertise I would never expect from one.

I take in work toxicity for 9 hours a day, show me an ai that can do that

@GSBarlev

18 күн бұрын

Fr. I was playing with an LLM, and it turns out if you're toxic to it, it becomes *extremely toxic* right back.

@PaulSpades

17 күн бұрын

@@GSBarlev Depends on the model. Some can take your toxicity all day long, every day of the year, no weekends off and spit out spectacularly polite responses. But you're in trouble if you start talking like that to real human beings after getting accustomed to it. The human is always the weak link.

Parrot promoted to product manager after learning to repeat "How's the project going?"

"I'm head of AI now". Just ended me finally, thanks :)

"I can build an entire app in an excel sheet". I have found my spiritual animal.

@ChiefBridgeFuser

18 күн бұрын

True story: I once build the controls for a manufacturing test fixture in excel macros. That was in the days before VBA as the scripting language. "Mistakes were made"😮😂

I once suggested to my senior product manager that we should try to dream a little and make a cool feature, she told that she doesn't dream about work. 🤔Also, she writes down documentation in Word and uploads it to Confluence as a file, i gave up trying to explain.

@lawrencemanning

17 күн бұрын

Unless you are paid very well or otherwise enjoy the work, that sounds like grounds to sod off somewhere else.

@Dav-jj2jb

17 күн бұрын

@@lawrencemanning I'm starting to think so as well.

"I have never used our product" That right there

'I'm head of AI now' so damn real I want to die

Surprised you didn't have to take that in your car, during launch week... our PM just went on holiday for launch week, after basically just stressing everyone out about deadlines, which are their own doing, by ignoring estimates, and over promising xD they barely touched Jira, or know how to use it

@replikvltyoutube3727

17 күн бұрын

Yeah.. no touching Jira is pain. Programmers basically have to self govern...

"I have a lawyer within the company".... 🤣

Make sure you get access.

Taking it back to the roots, I love it.

"We didn't meet our OKRs last quarter; we need new OKRs." I felt that one.

"I record all the meetings so I can sue them" LOL

This is so true. Old, outdated processes that need to be followed no matter what, but no one bothered enough to update them in order to actually reflect or simplify company needs whatsoever, welcome to coporate hellscape!

I like how you're just talking in the mic without even having the earbuds in during the teams calls

I find this relatable as someone who worked as a project manager.

This felt like the longest 6 minutes of my life. Spot on.

I discovered this channel last year or 2 years ago, it's hilarious and on point lmao

Right in the feels... Great video!

This makes work tomorrow bearable for me, knowing I'm not alone.

@internetmaryann

17 күн бұрын

You’re not. I’m waiting for SharePoint access since two weeks, looking at JIRA tickets, unable to move them due to lack of permissions.

@AGLubang

16 күн бұрын

"I'd like access, please."

Even though I'm laughing on the outside I'm absolutely crying on the inside because this is so damn accurate. 😆😫

"If we can clarify in an email, I'll set up a meeting."

This might be the best channel on YT at this point lol

Zero responsibility is always the objective

All those videos are not satire, they are a documentary.

"Make sure you turn your cameras on" wasn't in there, I'm seriously disappointed.

"If we can clarify in an email I set up a meeting, if we need to set up a meeting, I send an email. One must not be predictable"

This is art - you can tell by the comments that he's put us into the uncanny valley. Kudos -- I lost so much energy watching this, but it was cathartic.

Story points are hours and hard measures. We are agile or Scrum, it's company guideline. Write detailed tickets and close them if in doubt. Remember the Wiki if someone asks.

@EmptyZoo393

16 күн бұрын

At my last job I had issues being able to actually close out Jira tickets. I could implement and send to quality, but couldn't close it out any further. We also didn't have any automated testing, although they were working on it. Yeah, that place was a mess.

I like how he is in a teams meeting in the background.

"What's an OKR?" I asked myself. Then I asked a search engine. Then I got "An OKR is a popular management strategy that defines objectives and tracks results. It helps create alignment and engagement around " NONONO NONO NONONOMAKE IT STOP!

@PaulSpades

17 күн бұрын

hahahaha

This video gave me PTSD. Bravo 10/10.

That Teams ring tone is triggering PTSD

This video is definitely gonna blow up

That "Jira" cracked me up something fierce. Pure gold.

This brings me such joy

This is pure gold

Painfully accurate.

"One must not be predictable" rings so true !

The vest was a nice touch

“We didn’t meet our OKRs this quarter. So we need to change the OKRs” is some G shit 😂

Perfection as usual

why is this soooooo gooood.

4:23 "20.83 million. That... that sounds like a made-up number" :D

"jira" im already dead

It´s Dilbert for 2024. Thanks man.

“I have never used our product.” - nailed it

The more I listen to this, the better it gets

What's making these videos so funny is that it's so scary close to reality.

I have worked for this manager before