The last Twilight movie is called "Breaking Dawn Part 2". I don't split videos into part 1s and 2s. This is one video about one movie. I believe in you guys. You'll get through this together.

@spence98

2 жыл бұрын

i wondered how long you would go without adding this addendum - turns out it was 9 hours good video btw

@gorimbaud

2 жыл бұрын

i wondered about this for exactly one second, but i had already watched all your videos in the past week so i knew there wasn't another video

@juelsisgewd

2 жыл бұрын

Can't wait for part 3!

@entropy7999

2 жыл бұрын

I don't know why but I get the odd urge to call you a coward for adding this addendum instead of letting people stew in their confusion for a time. (also great video!)

@DontMockMySmock

2 жыл бұрын

maybe put the title of the movie in quote marks to make it clearer?

I love how Alice is universally attractive to every queer person I've ever interacted with

@nickziegler1904

2 жыл бұрын

It's not just queer people

@elix1133

2 жыл бұрын

@@nickziegler1904 Alice is fucking unstoppable she's too strong

@riersonjohnson1547

2 жыл бұрын

alice is like an inverse pansexual. instead of being attracted to everyone regardless of gender, she is attractive to everyone regardless of sexuality

@annabeatrizzimmermann7708

2 жыл бұрын

omg yes

@ayadean3491

2 жыл бұрын

@@riersonjohnson1547 HER POWER!!!

Headcanon: Jacob saying "So should I start calling you dad?" has nothing to do with the events that have unfolded. He just thinks Edward is daddy

@meiisintheuni8153

2 жыл бұрын

I think I will accept that as the only possible explanation

@emilyrln

2 жыл бұрын

Thank you for this. I accept it wholeheartedly.

@partycitydumpster

2 жыл бұрын

Jacob was so obsessed with being with Bella because hes destined to be daddy. Jacob is now runny egg's 3rd parent sorta, so he's suggesting the three of them form a polycule where they refer to one another as Mom and Dad like parents do

@g.j.9515

2 жыл бұрын

finally i can rest easy. edward is not daddy at all and its cursed but nowhere nearly as cursed as baby romantic partner.

@Treegona

2 жыл бұрын

The solution is Bella dates them both and Jacob imprinting is a kind of third parent "oh, this is My Child now." thing. Jacob calling Edward dad is at once "you are the father of my child" the same way a dad might call his wife "mom" in reference to their child, and testing the waters for calling him daddy in bed. No I do not take criticism.

I love the way you yell at me about a movie that I have yet to see.

@MutantAndProud

2 жыл бұрын

If you think THIS is great, wait until you check out....uh pretty much everything else they've posted, lol. It's all rapid loud-talking and non-stop fidgets and immaculately worded insight after immaculately worded insight. ❤️

@orchidcapitalofitaly9780

2 жыл бұрын

Jessie gender! I love your channel

@FlashBangBANGz

2 жыл бұрын

I'm subscribed to both of y'all.

@GINSHOTGUN

2 жыл бұрын

@@MutantAndProud Indeed

@kpotter6369

4 ай бұрын

I forgot that I've never watched the movies bc of all the media related to the movies I've consumed related to it

Bella is canonically a terrible and uninterested mother in the books. nothing, not even her own child, takes precedence over the love and obsession she has for Edward. she pretty much passes off her motherly responsibilities to Jacob and Rosalie because they’re more interested in having a relationship with Renaissance than she is. so I thought Kristen’s performance was great LOL

@Ginger_Cat2604

Жыл бұрын

Bella decided to die, if necessary, in order to have the baby. She chose the baby over Edward.

@julias.7534

7 ай бұрын

It's not so much about having a baby because she wants to be a mother. It's about having a baby -- a potentially immortal baby -- as the ultimate symbol of commitment.

@Cinema_Treats

5 ай бұрын

⁠@@Ginger_Cat2604the ONLY reason she choses to potentially die is cause she imagines she’s having a son that is a miniature version of Edward. She imagines him as perfect and basically projects all of her feelings towards Edward (and Jacob as she names this hypothetical son Edward-Jacob. Yikes). When is Ratagan is born as a little girl Bella comments on her beauty but other than that really doesn’t think or show genuine interest in her whatsoever. Bella is the same type of mother as Rene

@Ginger_Cat2604

5 ай бұрын

@@Cinema_Treats I don't see it that way. Bella is different from Renee in that she takes care of herself and her loved ones. I can feel Bella's love for her daughter, her horror that the Volturi want her dead, her determination to fight them and to learn to shield others.

@cryingwatercolours8127

4 ай бұрын

@@Ginger_Cat2604yeah she’s baffled by her quick growth and is scared for her life in many ways. I think she is interested in her daughter she just fears for her a lot and is trying to enjoy the little time she thinks she has with her, while also needing time to ensure her safety

CJ being down bad for every single character makes this video essay so much better.

@Blueeyesthewarrior

2 жыл бұрын

Truly an accurate representation of the entire Twilight fandom.

@zursee

2 жыл бұрын

and they're right!!

@juniperberryyyy

2 жыл бұрын

who isn't tho

@sarroumarbeu6810

2 жыл бұрын

Oh definitely

@graffititurtle11

2 жыл бұрын

my original plan was to skip this video and jus read some of the comments, but this convinced me

sarah z’s “i cannot stress how much a baby was fallen in love with” is one of the fucking funniest lines of dialogue ever written and spoken and i just hope she knows that

@habb420

2 жыл бұрын

I need someone smarter then me to explain what it means.

@hachikos

2 жыл бұрын

@@habb420 jacob fell in love with edward and bella's baby and was very blatant about it lol it's pretty straightforward

@zoeoe692

2 жыл бұрын

@@habb420 it’s also just a cleverly grammar-adverse internet speak type way to make the remark. kinda shitposty in its sentence structure

@vysharra

2 жыл бұрын

@@habb420 the Twilight universe has werewolves, of which Jacob is one, and the concept of “soul mates” exists for these werewolves in which they fall in love instantly and forever with their “perfect mate”. Age and perfect soul mates have no concept of human morality, so Jacob (who is sad and lonely since he was the fake arm of a love triangle that ‘lost’) sees the baby of his ex girlfriend and falls in perfect heteronormative mormon soul love despite her being a newborn. Weirdly, this is a _very_ normal thing to do when writing silly preteen self-insert fiction/fan fiction, it is cringe but to be faaaiiirrreee you’re not _normally_ writing for an audience of millions and many more millions who will see the movies, but by this point, no one in the editing team was able to tell Stephanie Meyer “no” and here we are.

@swipeswifejess3234

2 жыл бұрын

We Stan the Zed.

The sudden “do that to MEEEEE” absolutely killed me.

When you asked if Edward has panoptic vision, a wave of body horror cascaded over me. Truly chilling to imagine Edward Cullen being the All Seeing Eye in every room he's in, using a crowd of people like a series of security cameras he's monitoring. Stephanie truly harnessed some kind of wild genius energy when she wrote these books, if she were a more practiced writer they could have been very different.

@sylvie_loves_frogs4951

2 жыл бұрын

the biggest plot twist is that edward cullen is actually a member of the Eye (listen to the magnus archives)

@booklover8081

2 жыл бұрын

@@sylvie_loves_frogs4951 Edward Cullen is secretly Jonah Magnus apparently.

@doll_dress_swap1269

2 жыл бұрын

If all the interesting world building concepts, powers, and cast of side characters were the main focus of twilight these books could be an amazing dark romance horror fantasy.

@Spaceczarina

2 жыл бұрын

Stephanie really does have a knack of fun and interesting worldbuilding. it's just a shame that she chose a very mundane and toxic romance

@birdiejett3163

2 жыл бұрын

Ceaseless Watcher turn your Gaze upon this Wretched Franchise

This is literally the only channel on KZread and I’m grateful for it

@ozge8262

2 жыл бұрын

shanspeare!! i had a feeling you'd be watching this channel too!! ♡ i love your videos

@emptysoul8462

2 жыл бұрын

Love to see some of my favourite creators in one place! You’re vids are great!!❤️

@sleepysun555

2 жыл бұрын

I love your videos btw

@spookyho5994

2 жыл бұрын

SHANSPEARE OMG 🥺🥺

@irina5778

2 жыл бұрын

it made me so happy to hear you in the video and knowing that my two favorite youtubers know eachother URGH !!!!!

the bi-lighting, the crinkled up Twilight posters, the t-shirt, the deep seeded dive into all of my mixed feelings about twilight and why i revisit these movies often

@ayadean3491

2 жыл бұрын

SO TRUUUUU

@dangelobenjamin

2 жыл бұрын

No stop please finish this thought

@MxrmGxrl4

2 жыл бұрын

Glad I’m not the only one with mixed feelings…yet I’m simultaneously horrified 😂

"F*ck the fortune teller! I want the plot armor." Is my new favorite line in anything, ever... And pretty much summarizes the whole Twilight series.

@miss_chelles1338

Жыл бұрын

Same here. 😂

@rhincodon_typus

4 ай бұрын

I need that to be on a shirt. 👕

I think I've watched this video 15 or 20 times by now. The cadence. The insight. The vocabulary. The pop culture references. The pure comedic timing. It's all just a masterpiece. It is, dare I say it...GOOD ART. Thank you, CJ, for making this.

@djoctobeat5204

Жыл бұрын

Same, the rewatchability of this video is unmatched

@emiliemartin328

Жыл бұрын

yes

I feel so validated that: 1) someone finally recognized the genius of the fake fight 2) someone understands how complex the characters were portrayed randomly in this last movie despite there being no need or precedent for that 3) someone thought way too much about the ramifications of everyone's powers as well as how they interact with each other and create chaotic feedback loops of psychic ability like I did whenever I watched these movies

@maijennasis

2 жыл бұрын

yess

@chloe._.

2 жыл бұрын

I feel all of these, but I find it especially cathartic to hear someone else justify the fake fight. I've been alone in my appreciation for it for too long :,(

@AquarianValkari

2 жыл бұрын

This is why I love the internet...its a guarantee that somehow someway there are "someones" that validate very specific things you go through. Your bubble of people :3

@emmadenton1826

2 жыл бұрын

its been 10 YEARS and my opinion on that fight scene is still so heavily biased by the gut-wrenching shock of watching that scene in the cinema for the first time. The image of Carlisle's decapitated dead still sends shivers down my spine. Even though it's objectively an amazing scene, my first thought is still "god NO" when someone mentions the scene

@elix1133

2 жыл бұрын

@Emma Denton my mom is allergic to corn so we don't go to the theaters often, but I remember first seeing that movie at home and oh my God was I confused and upset. My gay little autistic brain was like ??? these people can't die they're too hot I don't understand. When I realized it was fake I literally had to pause it and come back in a few minutes because I was so shocked and angry but once the shock wore away it made a lot of sense. I suspected something was off because it was too visceral in a way that the other movies hadn't been, they were violent but in a cartoony way if that makes sense. This fight had actual stakes and that was weird.

“Fuck the fortune teller I want the PLOT ARMOR” THIS SENT ME OUT INTO ORBIT. This video scratched an unreachable part of my brain and I’m here for it.

@heatherevans198

2 жыл бұрын

Best line.

@Hyacinth77

2 жыл бұрын

It’s the adhd 😭

@AntiCensorshipProKindness

2 жыл бұрын

I laughed so hard I woke up my partner in the other room. Whoops.

27:18 "If something I say upsets you, don't comment, just come kill me" is a whole ass mood

“a bad movie is bad unless i like it, then it’s camp” - unknown twitter user

Alice's visions support the idea that free will exists in the Twilight universe but the whole phenomenon of imprinting among werewolves points towards determinism and they also happen to be the only beings Alice can't have visions of. I really want to believe it's an accident that Steph wrote the only non-white people in her series as the ones unable to write their own destinies but given her background and stances on other topics I'm not too hopeful. Anyways isn't it crazy how 9/11 lead to all of this

@juniperberryyyy

2 жыл бұрын

9/11 lead to what part exactly?

@lizv2428

2 жыл бұрын

@@juniperberryyyy basically edward is based off of gerard way from my chemical romance, a band which started in reaction to 9/11

@ActuallyAnanya

2 жыл бұрын

@@juniperberryyyy My Chemical Romance was formed literally the day after 9/11, as a direct result of the tragedy to help the band members process their emotions about the event. Stephenie Meyer had a celebrity crush on Gerard Way (MCR frontman) and he became the muse for the story that became Twilight. The chain of events actually keeps going if you consider the fact that 50 Shades of Grey was originally a Twilight fanfic. So a lot of people talk about the "9/11 to 50 Shades" pipeline.

@hal7741

2 жыл бұрын

@@ActuallyAnanya and Robert Pattinson starred in a movie that ended with 9/11 the plot is expanding

@lucyandecember2843

2 жыл бұрын

@@ActuallyAnanya damn thats a crazy line of events lol

love the 4.5 minute breakdown on Jane's brilliant characterization & Dakota's nuance portrayal of her. The franchise has somehow the most amazing side characters & minor villains yet doesn't do much with them, but the concepts are solid that I confess I steal some of them for D&D characters.

@herewegoagain4033

2 жыл бұрын

That's one of the criticisms of the story we focus on the most boring characters Bella and Edward when there's an ice berge of more interesting characters. Take rosaly, she almost got married and almost got everything she wanted except a child. Was killed and r worded by her future husband and his friend was turned and systematically murder all of them leaveing her husband for last so he knew she was coming and showed up in her wedding dress. But nooooooooooo we have the two emo kids making awkward eyes at each other.

@janascepkova5682

2 жыл бұрын

@@daniarocio5001 it's a role play fantasy game. They play if in stranger things at the beginning if you ve seen that

@herewegoagain4033

2 жыл бұрын

@@daniarocio5001 true but Edward was fashioned off of Gard way from MCR, also I myslef and an emo kid but atleast I'm 14 and deep lol (not actually 14 🤣) Also D&D is a table top RPG game you play with your friends or strangers but results may very when playing with strangers. Think skyrim but you actually have an impact on the world you play depending on your DM. If you want an example I would suggest checking out Critical Roll warning tho it's usually 3 hour+ vods and they are on what can be equated to season 3 or campaign 3.

Jacob being Rasputin’s Pokémon is honestly the only interpretation of their relationship that I’ll accept now

speaking as a recovered Twihard, seeing that fake fight for the first time on opening night in a theatre full of fans is still my most memorable cinema experience. truly transcendental.

@artbyflorina

Жыл бұрын

yes literally

@ingridbrindle3123

Жыл бұрын

FOR REAL the gasps, the shock, the awe, we were on the edge of our seats 😭

@agnes8610

10 ай бұрын

I was ready to leave the cinema, for the first time ever, when they beheaded Daddy Carlisle. I was so done with this movie. Glad I stayed until they clarified that it was all just a vision. 😂

@ElizaArika

6 ай бұрын

The several gasps of "wtf that was not in the books!!"

"I had a bout of poor mental health lately, and instead of seeking help I rewatched all these movies with a little bit of drool coming out of my mouth..." is the story of my life

@ThatWeirdFinn

2 жыл бұрын

Well, I've been looking for a psychotherapist for almost a year now, and finally gave up. I think I am better off not trying so fucking hard and constantly getting shut down. :D So: you've saved SO MUCH mental health energy by just watching movies!!

@JoaoJGabriel

2 жыл бұрын

@@ThatWeirdFinn on a more serious note, therapy and medication are very useful tools to have, and I hope you get access to them. But even you do, if you live with a chronic disorder, eventually you'll have to accept that you won't be always at your best, most healthy, self. And also, there are other tools that you can use for your own benefit, like a strong social net, healthy eating and sleeping, self awareness, meditation, mindset... the list goes on, and it's definitely not just the standard, capital attached, we all hear that is necessary

I try to avoid watching videos about stuff I’m not familiar with, but I saw this and was immediately like “Welp. Time to watch a video about Twilight.”

@yonbonny

2 жыл бұрын

This. 👍

@LJPugh187

2 жыл бұрын

smae

@kxngnxd7876

2 жыл бұрын

bet

@kxngnxd7876

2 жыл бұрын

bet

@davitdavid7165

2 жыл бұрын

If its made by cj the x, its good, period.

the "do that to ME" bit has swiftly become part of my vocabulary, thanks cj

@homotron500

Жыл бұрын

time stamp?

@Orangecatinahoodie

8 ай бұрын

@@homotron500 3:26

@repulsethemonkey1396

3 ай бұрын

​@@homotron5003:23

the feeling of “this world is unintentionally so complex and interesting what the fuck” juxtaposed with “and then we replace fire hydrants with gas cans and don’t tell anybody” is actually religious

@jaxorisit1447

11 ай бұрын

ikr, this is why i watch cj

I once saw the take that Twilight is an incredible interesting and compelling franchise if you focus on every single aspect EXCEPT for the main love story and they were RIGHT and this essay is one more thing proving that point. God I love your videos, immaculatr energy fr fr

@abee948

2 жыл бұрын

GOD that is so true

@kittykittybangbang9367

2 жыл бұрын

So true, I don't know why people still keep making Twilight out to be like it's the worst thing ever. Like come on there are far worser books and movies out there, and people still keep on beating a dead horse like Twilight (which ended years ago and is no longer relevant anymore.) SMH

@lithiumkid

2 жыл бұрын

@@kittykittybangbang9367 because of the weird and hilarious acting in the first movie (e.g. the fan scene), and the really abusive, nihilistic significant-age-gap romantic relationship between the leads that isn’t acknowledged as twisted & creepy as much as it should be

@miss_chelles1338

2 жыл бұрын

Bro! I was ALSO low-key feeling that way, despite never actually watching the whole series. 😂

@miss_chelles1338

2 жыл бұрын

@@kittykittybangbang9367 YES! THIS!

I grew up with chickens and when we wanted them to zone out we flipped them upside down instead of covering their eyes.

@cjthex

2 жыл бұрын

alternative techniques!!!!!

@skypaver989

2 жыл бұрын

If you do that with furbies they turn evil

@miriamvlachoulis6875

8 ай бұрын

Tonic immobility

I literally never noticed that bit about Aro and this essay reminded me that Dakota Fanning and Michael Sheen are incredible actors. Also that this series was elevated by actors who were way too good for the script. Also that Lee Pace and Rami Malek in one film is the treat we may never have again

The word that comes to mind with Jacob and Renault is “ward.” Which, if you haven’t read a dusty Victorian novel lately: a childless wealthy grown man adopts a child who has lost their parents, and if that child is a girl, suddenly, when she is of age, the man marries her, the girl he has been raising for many years. Not always; sometimes the kid just becomes their heir. But it happens often enough that it’s what I remember first about the word ward. 🤢

@Dracosfire14

Жыл бұрын

Huh, "ward" makes me think of Batman, and now I feel ill

@lkcullen1918

Жыл бұрын

Judge Turpin from the play Sweeney Todd comes to mind

@dysmissme7343

Жыл бұрын

Ewwww

@agnes8610

10 ай бұрын

​@@lkcullen1918yes, that was my first thought too. Creepy 😭

@b0xbrain

6 ай бұрын

@lkcullen1918 fun fact! Jamie Campbell Bower plays both Caius in Twilight and Anthony in Sweeney Todd! (Caius is the one that got the top of his head removed from his jaw)

Marcus accepted death bc his partner was killed forever ago and since then he's been miserable and just waiting to die and i love that they added that small bit with such few words

@phelanii4444

2 жыл бұрын

That was my favourite thing about that whole movie. Still is.

@roanaway

2 жыл бұрын

iirc i think Aro was also responsible for his partner dying but its been years since ive read the books

@arthistorynerd

2 жыл бұрын

@@roanaway Marcus Partner was Didme, Aros SISTER and yes he killed her bc they were so happy with each other that they were contemplating leaving the Volturi and so Aro chose his self built government over his sister that he saved and turned himself bc he loved her

@emilyrln

2 жыл бұрын

@@arthistorynerd damn, that sounds so much more interesting than literally everything that happens in the main story 😂

@dare7782

2 жыл бұрын

@@emilyrln Par for the course in this series, just ask Alice and Carlisle

Okay, but CJ putting Edward's "As if you could outrun me, as if you could fight me off!" dialogue over Battinson punching a guy was too perfect. 😆

@itsalladream5559

2 жыл бұрын

Battinson! 😆

The fact that you managed more intellectual analysis of this text than either the author or the film makers of this work probably did while thirsting prety much the entire cast and screaming at the camera is absolutely spectacular!

Having gotten diagnosed with BPD last year and then learning the idea of the "Favorite Person", I kept joking it was The Jacob Black Experience. It feels like an imprinting but with the actual reality of how terrible that concept is. It's not fun for both me and the target of my affection, the compulsions and separation anxiety are exhausting, and unfortunately it flips between platonic and romantic feelings often. I definitely feel like Twilight's imprinting could of been extremely interesting to explore in it's own series with more earnest thought put into the implications... And without all the suggestions of grooming.

@islab2458

2 жыл бұрын

I probably was Borderline as a teen and then into my early 20s, did what was essentially DBT training on my own without realizing it a little later. And yes, I deeply relate to this as well. I'm certain BPD was 95% of the reason I liked Twilight so much in general -- Bella and Edward's relationship reeks of "favorite people" dynamics, only it's mutual. Funny enough my marriage is similar in terms of intensity and "literally no one understands me to a painfully nuanced degree the way you do" shit. Twilight was my relationship blueprint throughout my entire adolescence up until I started realizing as a young adult how unrealistic it is for 99% of people. Turns out I'm on the spectrum and have ADHD, and part of both of those is the Rejection Sensitivity Disorder. It's manageable, much more so than BPD was. So while this sort of thing doesn't (and, admittedly, shouldn't) work for most, I'm riding on 5+ of bliss with my wife because we've both always been this way to some degree and we "get it." We're both obsessed with each other but not to a gross, detrimental degree where we can't have friends or the entire fucking world revolves around each other. All the same, it's more like Edward and Bella than I'd ever anticipated was possible, to be honest. TL;DR: I too relate to the "Imprinting roughly equals aspects of BPD" thing and so always felt bad for Jacob's character having been written into, ya know, a rather pedophilic corner. Pretty unfair.

@Tomyotan

2 жыл бұрын

@@islab2458 Quite honestly I was downplaying my opinions on FPs because I know it can be polarizing but my previous FP was a very good experience that I think mostly fell apart because it took so long for my diagnosis to come to light. To me I think the term should be a bit more accepted because it can be healthy, said previous FP wasn't romantically interested in me and I was able to accept that and function without them so long as our bond was fortified. Which definately makes me sad that they really did drop the ball on actually showing a platonic imprinting. I'm in a pretty gray situation with my current FP but just caring about them made me take better care of myself so I could support them rather than be dependant of them supporting me and now I've been on the longest streak of being consistent on my meds and put more effort into my business to distract obsessive thoughts. There's definately so many ways to play off the idea of "I'm bonded to you and need to be in your life" that really could've been more than just "and now I will become your perfect partner." (also yes, I definately see all 3 main characters representing a lot of aspects of bpd)

@sylvie_loves_frogs4951

2 жыл бұрын

all i got from this was "jacob has bpd" and i've never seen a more correct opinion

@alim.9801

10 ай бұрын

I hope you're doing ok, that sounds incredibly hard to make sense of and manage in a healthy way. Hope you're taking care of yourself 💜

@andthelastshallbefirsttoim2795

6 ай бұрын

oh this explains a lot I'm fucked

Ok but also why did Carlisle and Bella have way more on screen chemistry in the few scenes in which they interacted than Edward and Bella did through the entire series???

@samrobotsin

2 жыл бұрын

Because Carlisle is a handsome lesbian.

@annabeatrizzimmermann7708

2 жыл бұрын

yes i noticed that too it's extremely distracting lmao

@jazwhoaskedforthis

2 жыл бұрын

That’s funny considering the actors were like dating, right? Bella and Edward? And yet

@NosebleeddeGroselha

2 жыл бұрын

@@jazwhoaskedforthis it was more of a marketing stunt, if I’m not mistaken they didn’t really get along lmao

@manderly33

2 жыл бұрын

It could be because Facinelli was a better, more experienced actor; because Stewart and Pattinson were together (sometimes that fucks with onscreen chemistry); because Stewart and Pattison had layers of character stuff they had to portray that Facinelli didn’t have to worry about. Who knows. Some actors are just naturally good at creating chemistry with everyone.

OK,, SO! About Bella having her vampire abilities when she is still human! She isn’t the only one! Alice had visions of the future which landed her in the asylum where she was turned. I’m not sure if this is mentioned in the series or just in the other canon books but it does set precedent for some especially powerful vampires having powers before being turned! And from Midnight Sun we learn that Edward has trouble reading Charlie’s mind, so somehow powers are inherited (?). Very strange, but also intriguing!

@missyllaineous

2 жыл бұрын

I love the idea that vampires are just humans strongly intensified, and the reason they need blood is because they're burning their lives out at such an accelerated rate and they need lots of human fuel to keep functioning. Some of the best supernatural creatures are the human ones, I think.

@katie1921

2 жыл бұрын

Love that Charlie detail where Edward’s like “oh fuck this whole time I just thought that meant he was stupid”

@madiis18account

2 жыл бұрын

Also canonically from the get-go Alice struggled with visions of the future that involved Bella. They were much harder for her to interpret and often had chunks missing, same for things involving Charlie later on.

@metoo3342

2 жыл бұрын

Benjamin also had powers before he was turned.

@doll_dress_swap1269

2 жыл бұрын

The twins in the Volturi both exhibited potential while human, which is why Aro turned them once they were old enough to do it.

The bit about Alice making you attracted to women with short hair for the rest of your life was too relatable and i feel called out

cool essay. now tell us your thoughts on the fact that bella was perfectly written to already be part vampire but that story line just completely disappeared near the end. like, this ho can smell blood from across the room, she's unnaturally pale and she adapts to being a vampire realy quickly. stephenie had all the framework for a part vampire reveal but then just forgot about it? she even made it explicitly clear that half human/vampire hybrids are 100% possible in universe. it may also explain why both she and her dad already have the shield abilities while still human

@dsaybra

2 жыл бұрын

LITERALLY, the opportunity for a vampire grandparent or great-grandparent was RIGHT THERE. like at least give us a reason as to why bella’s “special”

@cookycandy4

Жыл бұрын

and in midnight sun its implied that charlie has the latent ability (but to a far less superior extent) which means it couldve been both charlie AND renee? vampire grandparentS

@art-is-awen8842

Жыл бұрын

yeah I swear sm is just holding onto that for some eventual long term secret it's so easy to reveal jk style, or a book about Charlie a la Midnight Sun she CLEARLY planned it, it's all in the text

@Blueeyesthewarrior

Жыл бұрын

@@art-is-awen8842 The Twilight universe is so unintentionally interesting. Tell me more, Stephanie Meyer, I NEED TO KNOW!

Watching cj's videos is the modern version of talking to dionisus

@sylvie_loves_frogs4951

2 жыл бұрын

wrong it's more like meeting a crazed phophet of dionysus, like they're just spitting the hottest of takes and dionysus is just listening like "damn i didn't even tell him to do that lmao"

cj you've missed an important little detail on your final rant. benjamin a.k.a the rami malek vampire who's also the best character of the movie, had fire powers before turning. like as. as a human. he could just control fire somehow so technically and canonically human magic powers exist and bella had them but somehow when she turned she only got the lame ability to expand them. like come on rami malek started to control every element what is up with bella wasn't she like The Mary Sue Ever why can she just make her shield bigger what's up with that

@bluejay8422

2 жыл бұрын

I'm pretty sure it is stated somewhere in the books Renee and Charlie both have human abilities like Bella did. So, it makes sense why Bella also had a gift.

@zurichRevolts

2 жыл бұрын

isn't alice's backstory that, before she was turned, she was in an insane asylum because she claimed to be clairvoyant? you don't even have to look at the the obscure tertiary characters. i think the thing with bella's parents is just that charlie's thoughts are harder to read, like edward just gets emotions and 'vibes' from him

@cicadeus7741

2 жыл бұрын

A fic i read expanded on it really well. Charlie had the same brain shield, got vamp'd, and he was instead able to push his (now physical) shield into others, cracking them apart from the inside out. It was fucking badass.

@wren6311

2 ай бұрын

@@zurichRevoltsand Bella's mother has EXTREMELY loud thoughts. I bet if Renee became a vampire she'd either be able to project her thoughts to others consciously (Like Renesmee but with range like Edward), OR she might be able to overwrite other people's thoughts with her own (AKA Mind control).

Was feeling down so I rewatched the whole thing to make timestamps for all the times you chose a better name for the vampire baby than smeyer did: 2:07 Ratatouille 2:46 Rasputin 8:13 Ramesses the II 9:21 Ravenclaw 19:53 Rihanna 27:49 Ronald Reagan 27:52 Rum-Tum-Tugger 28:35 Regigigas 29:56 Rhinoplasty 30:45 Rumpelstiltskin 30:54 Rin Tin Tin 31:09 Roblox 31:38 Rip Van Winkle 32:05 Robitussin 32:50 Rollerskates 33:25 Reptar (credit to Fortmax in the replies for finding that!) 33:48 Rico Nasty

@sylvie_loves_frogs4951

2 жыл бұрын

tag urself i'm rollerskates

@thifanny7298

2 жыл бұрын

@@sylvie_loves_frogs4951 i'm rum-tum-tugger

@nikkydalby7126

2 жыл бұрын

Thank you 😂😂

@alexmooney7474

2 жыл бұрын

All of the applause to you, my friend. You're doing God's work. Thank you!

@quinnlove5777

2 жыл бұрын

I’m Rico nasty

The speed of this video is both an ADHD dream and an easter egg nightmare you mad genius

Love how CJ always manages to throw in something about Miraculous Ladybug: Tales of Ladybug & Cat Noir 🐞 🐈‍⬛ in every essay 🤣

@Me-vn3gz

2 жыл бұрын

it’s that good

@Jotari

2 жыл бұрын

Eh, it's getting a bit over played by now.

@nikkifri1150

2 жыл бұрын

@@Jotari I enjoy it, but to each their own 😎

@micahtiel

Жыл бұрын

timestamp pls? xD

@nikkifri1150

Жыл бұрын

@@micahtiel 6:23 I rewatched to find it amongst this evergreen content.

For all the god-tier one-liners and excessively deep analysis, tearing down the first poster shook me for reasons unknown even to myself!!!!

@wanderernix5392

2 жыл бұрын

Same!

@emmadenton1826

2 жыл бұрын

it's the 14 year old version of myself that lurks deep within my psyche

I stand by my assessment that imprinting COULD HAVE BEEN harmless and even a little interesting had Smeyer made even just one of the other imprinted pairs platonic. It wouldn't have been this automatic "uh oh, grooming alert" red flag (or at least not as much of one) if we had had an example of it staying as just like a friendly/brotherly protector role and not romantic.

@caitmonroe9349

4 ай бұрын

I vaguely remember there also being some line in there specifically about how imprinting was there to strengthen the wolves' bloodlines, and having the special sauce of eugenics on top of grooming is... not awesome

The uncontrollable thirst and accurate baby names got me so close to laughing in public. In public. Thanks for bringing some joy in my life and tickling some hidden part of my brain with your analysis.

Who coulda thought 10 years ago that today we'd be living through the "Stephenie Meyer is a more interesting author than JR Rowling" arc.

@islab2458

2 жыл бұрын

Out of all the great comments under this video, this one is the best and insanely underrated, holy shit what a great take.

@mli6976

2 жыл бұрын

You just blew my mind. This reality is wild...clearly, we need to restart the simulation.

@aspacelex

2 жыл бұрын

@@islab2458 I agree with you.

@featherycoffee1401

2 жыл бұрын

JKR is more interesting, just in a... Different way

@LISE_NR

2 жыл бұрын

that statement sounds crazy at first but is...so true

"I can do that to cats when I'm high" might be the funniest thing you've ever written. Perfection.

I remember being even more creeped out by the book’s explanation of the baby growing up faster, implying they will have a relationship before she’s even 10 years old. I upset me even as a kid reading it. I just makes me think of all those pedos saying “oh she looked 18“ or “she was very mature for a 10 year old “ 🤢

@Laurabeck329

4 ай бұрын

It's like reverse lolicon. Yes I feel disgusted for writingt this sentence and I will crawl into my hole of shame

as an autistic person with my main special interest, this is the video i’ve always wanted to make but know i could never do it well enough. thank you beyond thank you

Everyone in the comments talking about how they are looking for CJ's Breaking Dawn Part 1 video fundamentally misunderstands the nature of this being and will never be able to sleep at night until they wrap their heads around him. He's not a youtuber making videos in a linear time frame, he's an eldritch horror talking about whatever he wants

@catrionaclark8041

2 жыл бұрын

This is what adhd representation looks like

@fabienschmutz8474

2 жыл бұрын

The movie is called "breaking dawn, part two". What are you on

@kristavaillancourt6313

2 жыл бұрын

You haven't watched him enough if you don't immediately go 'okay, I guess we're on this now' when reading the title.

@TheRenaSystem

2 жыл бұрын

They use they/them and he/him This edited comment was made possible by @Sebaberto and viewers like you. Thank you.

@tand0r

2 жыл бұрын

@@TheRenaSystem They use both!

the breakneck speed of your analysis coupled with the recognition that every single minor character is cooler than bella and the dual presentation of the nature of imprinting really felt like a 4 course meal, all this to say, ur right about lee pace

the whole “i trust only u to love n protect her jacob” thing rings in accordance to stephanie myers mormon-ness (not that she practices or condones any of that, but the act of sending literal spiritual ownership of a daughter to a trusted man to be her husband is a deep cultural issue in most branches of fundamentalism, esp mormons)

After rewatching all of arrested development, that one part where the shirtless where wolfs are running out of the building to “the boys are back in town” while wearing only cut offs makes my brain go “they’re naked, but using cutoff shorts to censor things because it’s easier than animating a black box to cover their junk”

I'm not gonna lie - when I force a guy who's interested in me to watch this series I do it explicitly to watch their reaction to the fact that end fight wasn't real. it's worth it every time

@genericyoutubehandle.

2 жыл бұрын

What an idea

@dysmissme7343

Жыл бұрын

@@genericyoutubehandle. Fr though I’m intrigued

I have yet to experience a movie that I could even slightly compare to the experience of watching Breaking Dawn Part 2 in theaters for the first time. The screaming, the crying, the cheering, the laughter. No one can take that away from me

@sedi2066

2 жыл бұрын

Duuude! Everyone clapping as the credits rolled. Nothing like it!

@NosebleeddeGroselha

2 жыл бұрын

I haven’t watched the movie in the theater, but instead I watched it on TV with my family. Imagine: four druncles, four gossipy aunts, my mom and dad scream-laughing, my grandparents *extremely* confused with everything, and finally me plus all my cousins in pure, untamable chaotic energy. All watching Breaking Down Pt. 2 together in an afternoon. It was easily the best day of my life.

@Cantrona

2 жыл бұрын

I've only experienced that again with Spider-Man: No Way Home :,)

@heathenpotato

2 жыл бұрын

I remember being seated between two of my friends who were really into the series and who were team Jacob and team Edward exclusively, and both of them were having full on sobbing meltdowns over different characters dying and I was just kind of sitting there in the middle like "damn". It was definitely An Experience

@zekewalker1350

2 жыл бұрын

@@heathenpotato my mom took me& my best friend, two twihard ass kids and she felt the same way. She was like “why are y’all like this”

The rant at the end is literally me pacing back and forth in my room arguing with myself about the characters/plot/lore in The Vampire Diaries and The Originals.

@duckysmith

2 жыл бұрын

I would like to hear that

Hearing about the situation, I thought the fact that imprinting was explicitly involuntary on the part of the person affected, and the fact that Jacob himself explicitly talked about imprinting as if it was nightmarish and disturbing and non-consensual and dreadful to him, actually made Jacob and Reeses Puff's bond extremely interesting and tragic... However that reading is kinda betrayed by Jacob romanticizing and wanting to imprint on Bella at the same time or after talking about it, and later hoping to imprint on someone like it's a cheat to get over Bella without therapy. Also imprinting mind controlling him into bonding to someone shouldn't make him think it's okay or appropriate to sexualize or romanticize someone he's aiding in the development of before she could ever even possibly make that choice herself. So Steph's hella gross for that shit.

When CJ said "do that to me" to the clip of Lee Pace kicking someone in an alley I lost it 🤣🤣

@MutantAndProud

2 жыл бұрын

My roommate, passing by as I watched that moment in the video, simply murmured "oh, mood" and kept walking

@new111naruto

2 жыл бұрын

Also "I NEED HIM TO TOUCH ME!!!!" 😂😂

The ONLY WAY the "should I start calling you Dad" line is acceptable is if instead of inevitable "son-in-law" title, its actually a 'im now your son, and Resume's Brother" as in a big brother/guardian angel. Just a thought (and I always thought it was weird too. What was Smeyer thinking??)

@theresaross4742

2 жыл бұрын

It was funny, disgustingly funny😹

@itsschmid_8899

2 жыл бұрын

It looks like you calling her resume was autocorrect but it follows the bit from the vid of calling her anything except her name so I can’t tell if it’s intentional or not either way v amusing

@g.j.9515

2 жыл бұрын

thatd be so funny. guardian angel interpretation gives room for brotherly love and jacob doesnt have face to call bella mom because of their ages and history but edward is the perfect target. 100 year old boy definitely has some fatherly energy in him. jacob could exploit it if he played his cards right, acted immature in a specific way that would activate edwards dad energy. thats hilarious

@TabbyeLynne

2 жыл бұрын

In the books it's Edward calling Jacob son instead, meaning he accepts the grooming, father of the year right there 🤢

halfway through watching the spiderman video it disappeared and I am SAD

@rabiez_luvr6910

2 жыл бұрын

Same

@planetina5616

2 жыл бұрын

I knew I saw a notification and wondered why I couldn't find it! :'(

@rabiez_luvr6910

2 жыл бұрын

Oh yeah I love your art btw

This man is doing the impossible, making Twilight seem like peak

Bless your soul for putting out such a brave opinion. The right opinion.

@bigfiach1052

2 жыл бұрын

wrong channel

@katback1678

2 жыл бұрын

@@bigfiach1052 correct

DONT FORGET ABOUT JACOB BEING SO INTO BELLA BECAUSE SHE HAD THE *EGG IN HER OVARIES* THAT WOULD BECOME RENESMEE

@emilyrln

2 жыл бұрын

the Renesmegg… 💀😂

Correction: Aro's power isn't mind reading. It's psychometry. He can see the history of a person when he touches them. Meaning, he wasn't really reading Edward's mind in New Moon, nor was he doing so in Breaking Dawn. Since he's simply seeing everything Alice had seen from when he last touched him (probably in New Moon as well) up until that moment. It's simply a cinematic choice to only show the vision at that point.

@nguyenkhanhhailinh1721

Жыл бұрын

Doesn't Edward say that Aro could read every thought he's ever had ?

@geosustento8894

Жыл бұрын

@@nguyenkhanhhailinh1721 yes. A person's thoughts is part of their history

@swatisaini6447

Жыл бұрын

@@geosustento8894 do u think in new moon aro managed to see Alice's human memories which she has forgotten due to shock therapy?

@dysmissme7343

Жыл бұрын

@@swatisaini6447 I personally doubt it

Okay so when I first read Breaking Dawn Jacob’s imprinting pissed me off so bad I stormed out of my room in the middle of the night (yes I bought the book at a midnight release) and flung the book into the front yard at my house. I finished the book a week later infuriated and from that point went from being a fan to an avid hater of Twilight. I blocked out the line “Goodbye Jacob my brother…my son“ but hearing it again has caused me serious psychic damage I just shrieked, it’s 3 am and I am in pain.

My attention is captured by the red wine and I am simultaneously made perfectly aware of my socially conditioned limitations lacking me into a self-constructed cage of “omg, what if it spills and stains” and freed of my mill-stone expectations by knowing I too could sit in the bisexual-euphoria pretzel and gesture my thoughts with a half-full glass of red wine if I was brave enough.

@hakudoushinumbernine

2 жыл бұрын

I feel like there should have been a cut away wheres mopping it up when he does spill the wine before cutting back in the essay. I had the same thoughts

@wanderernix5392

2 жыл бұрын

Spill your wine, just a little, as a treat.

@jazwhoaskedforthis

2 жыл бұрын

It did around the 20 minute mark I think it was, lol

@disasterjones5798

2 жыл бұрын

spilling on hard surface ain't so bad but carpet spills are my enemy, i never get it fully dry and then i step in it later and my sock gets wet :c

@StraveTube

2 жыл бұрын

@@hakudoushinumbernine Mopping it up would break my internal illusion that CJ is constantly perched over a kiddy pool full of wine

I remember freaking tf OUT in theaters when they started fighting, just gasping loudly and muttering eith my sisters "this didn't happen in the books!" Over and over and sighing in heavy relief when it turned out to be a vision. Even had a moment with a total stranger sitting next to us who was going on the same journey reaching out and laughing with each other in relief that it wasn't real 😂 I always didn't like it cuz it felt so unnecessary to the plot, especially since Alice says "it doesn't matter what I show you, you're not gonna change your mind" but then he changes his mind anyways so it felt so inconsistent. But I loved the interpretation you had, all the ways it worked with how it played out, it definitely adds more to the meaning when you think about it like that. Also I hate the imprinting thing more than anything because of how important it was to the plot in order to keep Bella and Renesme alive. It really didn't have to become a romantic thing at all, if it had literally just been "I will be your protector and guardian as long as I live" like a godparent type thing, it would've been SO MUCH better but NO. Stephanie Meyer, WHY?!

I was really hoping you would address the issue of Alice sharing the fight vision with Aro when it's been previously ruled that she's not able to see anything in her visions that include the wolves.

@wren6311

2 ай бұрын

the writing staff weighed the pros and cons of creating an intentional plot hole and decided to go with the cool fight scene over continuity.

See, honestly I ACTUALLY think that there are a lot of concepts and worldbuilding in the series that are GENUINELY VERY INTERESTING like yeah that sparkling in the sun thing is goofy as all hell and probably shouldn't have been done but the idea that their flesh has basically turned into stone??? Fascinating and newly conceived vampire lore. The werewolf worldbuilding is pretty interesting as well. I actually also think imprinting is a very compelling and interesting feature of the world and the whole imprinting = romance makes it SO incredibly unfortunate and it could have been done so much better. It being not inevitably romantic would have made it 100x more interesting because we as a society focus WAY TOO MUCH on romantic relationships over platonic/familial relationships, and the idea that your primary relationship and dedication to a person is not romantic is a fascinating and little-explored concept.

@MistyWarden

2 жыл бұрын

Twilight lore has a lot in common with Harry Potter lore in that the implications and subtext is often WAY more interesting than the actual books (and every time the authors step in to “clarify” things they make it so much worse 🙈)

@ActuallyAnanya

2 жыл бұрын

That and the fact that Stephanie Meyer is accidentally writes really compelling horror like obviously there's the whole birth scene, but people often forget the Volturi routinely luring humans in large groups into their spaces, humans that want to be vampires - i.e. the Volturi are breaking their OWN fundamental rule by exposing their existence to humans - just to break their promise and feed on them on their own turf. The Volturi are a cult in the truest definition and I wish Stephanie had given us the horror franchise based on them that we deserved instead.

@feztheshep

2 жыл бұрын

@@ActuallyAnanya YES!! Also little details like the scared woman holding the rosary who Bella notices going into the chamber before getting eaten (I promise I'm not like a twilight superfan I just specifically remember that, it was an interesting little detail). I neglected to mention it before but the Volturi old world rules lore is actually really interesting too! I know "powerful old world rulers who are thousands of years old" isn't like super original but it's really cool? Not to mention the different regional covens and their diverse characteristics. For a "teen romance" series, there is so much potential for world building even if we only got to see a tiny bit of it.

@perrisavallon5170

2 жыл бұрын

If you've ever read The Host, that also had some fantastic ideas with pretty bad execution. Stephanie Meyer is really good at coming up with interesting lore, she just doesn't always know what to do with it.

@grouchygoat

2 жыл бұрын

I think imprinting should have been a grounding phenomenon for the Wolves. The Wolves are supposed to protect their people but considering that they are incredibly strong, deadly, and in theory have no explicit age limit it's a bit of a stretch to think that no wolves would stray from their "purpose". Even the Alpha command has its limits as seen in breaking dawn. And even if the other wolves are bound to obey the Alpha what's to stop him from becoming cruel and power-hungry or simply abandoning their home and living as a wolf forever indefinitely. Perhaps imprinting can be a fail-safe that keep wolves on their intended path and purpose. Imprinting ties them to their human form and instills a singular sense of loyalty, humility, and duty in a way no other person could. It also has the side effect of limiting their lifespan because no shifter can bare outliving their imprint and to keep the other wolves from suffering they will progressivly shift less and less so that when their imprint dies (naturally of old age) they are no long broadcasting to the pack. This is just how I would changed the basis of imprinting and I had a lot more typed out on how this could interact with the given plot to give depth and practicality but it was getting way to long so imma save the rest for good old Tumblr.

I almost burst into laughter and tears in the bus at "YOU NICKNAMED my DAUGHTER after the LOCH NESS MONSTER!?" even though I knew it would show up at some point

The whole imprinting thing comes from the author being Mormon. In Mormonism they believe in predetermination for spouses like soul mates. And there are often marriages where the wife is scary young and the man is much older.... but there were meant to be apparently so it's ok

@kaamn1829

2 жыл бұрын

wtf no, meyer's just weird for that shit. i've lived and grown up in the heart of mormon spaces wherever we've moved across the US cause my family's just uber religious and that has NEVER been a common belief. mormonism is strictly against predetermination, even as the whole capital g God knows and has accounted for everything thing is still super present, as agency and making your own choices is the key thing. there's even the whole thing where God will 'let' bad things happen to make sure that the person is digging their own grave and there's no deniability. like some people do believe in soulmates obv, but some people everywhere in every religion and non religion do. maybe you're thinking of like those fundamentalists or smth?? all the mormon mommies I know think the Jacob--baby thing is fucking nasty and bizarre. my own uber religious mother who legit believes in some forms of witchcraft thought that shit was bonkers.

@shannahbaudelaire

2 жыл бұрын

Lol. Only in Saturday's Warrior, which is Mormon fanfiction, not Mormon doctrine.

@leahscontemporary

2 жыл бұрын

@@kaamn1829 what an essay

@kaamn1829

2 жыл бұрын

@@leahscontemporary 🤷‍♀

@goldenlokosian3740

Жыл бұрын

@@kaamn1829 You sure it's not a belief? I thought that was one of the secret things that gets revealed in temple ceremonies. I mean, members of the LDS church are big into agency but predetermined roles are an inherent part of the doctrine with certain people having been foreordained to specific callings and offices. I wouldn't be surprised if that were a belief that isn't talked about with folks who aren't members. (Source: I'm an Ex-Mo who was raised Mormon in Utah, and was pretty deep in the faith before I left.) That being said, I haven't met any Mormons where I live who were chill with Jacob imprinting on a baby.

So I think Bella's shield is her ability to shut herself off from people. She does everything for other people and doesn't complain at their expense and hides her emotions which resulted in a shield.

the thing that always gets me about jane and alec in that they were 12 or 13 when they were turned. We know that the vampires are frozen at the maturity that they are when they were turned, so it makes sense to me that Jane would be foolish and angry and yet obedient, because she's fucking 13. Imagine being stuck forever at 13.

Twilight is the dumbest thing ever yet (just like his analysis of Victorious) CJ the X is so fucking brilliant and entertaining that I couldn't help but watch and enjoy every minute of this, best channel on KZread

@therilyncobrin2372

2 жыл бұрын

not to be that person, but *they

@ActuallyAnanya

2 жыл бұрын

@@therilyncobrin2372 they use both he/him and they/them pronouns

@therilyncobrin2372

2 жыл бұрын

@@ActuallyAnanya ah. I have learned something new. thanks!

Never read a single twilight book or seen the films. But I'm obsessed with this.

"breaking dawn part 2 is a lot like dune, except it isn't" genuinely had me DYING

The best thing that twilight did was not the god awful fanfiction it inspired like fifty shades of grey but instead the scene of wolves barking English that is for the history books.

I enjoy the chaotic, insightful intensity and frustrated raccoon punk aesthetic of this X called CJ. I will likely never watch these Twilight movies, not my genre. But I enjoy the analysis given here. The actor who plays Carlisle (sp?) played a deeeeeeply douchey doctor on the show Nurse Jackie and I cannot unsee that so I can’t take him seriously.

The speed of which this video essay is given made my ADHD brain happier than any video essay before. Cheers! I love it.

Every single time cj uploads he forcefully removes all my brain wires and plugs them into all the wrong spots to make me see beyond reality and i love that fried feeling as my brain fights god himself and is wrenched back into the comforting embrace of physics and step by step baby logic Also he makes words word easier for my word maker and that's cool

THE EDITING MAKES ME SCREEEECH Every time I heard “the boys are back in town” my soul left my body. Thank you for finally excusing my love for this film with concise words and arguments 😂

Love the utter commitment this series has to making everyone outside of Bella so Compelling. Lee Pace vampire supremecy

I've had such a long and complicated relationship with this series. At first I was blindly obsessed and thought it was the best love story ever (cut me some slack, I was a kid). Then my mom was like "uhh this relationship isn't healthy" and the internet interneted and I spiraled into blind Twilight hate. More recently I've regained my love and come to the realization that A. Twilight is a comedy and B. It's a bonding experience. Every time I watch it with a new person we come up with inside jokes and laugh at something different. Twilight is iconic and I will probably be rewatching it every year 💕 Edit: this is not to say it's a good series by any means, I'm well aware of the problems with it. It's just ... an experience

I screamed every time CJ thirsted over Lee Pace because me too

Me, who has never watched Twilight: "So he imprinted on a baby. The kid thinks he their guardian now. Big deal. CJ: *further explains imprinting in the Twilight Universe* Me: "O...Ooh!! Yeah....That's problematic."

@Robstafarian

2 жыл бұрын

Yeah, coming into this blind was probably a better experience than reading or watching Twilight.

A noté on the end rant: Alice is revealed to have had physic powers as a human in Midnight Sun, which I found neat.

I recently finally convinced a group of people I have been friends with for near a decade to watch these movies. One of them very early on started cracking a lot of jokes and making fun of them, which is the proper thing to do, but around the last two movies she kind of died down and after we finished them all I turned to ask her what she thought and the first words out of her mouth were “why didn’t you tell me the last one was good?!”

Every single joke about Renesmee's name has sent me into a laugh-coughing fit Edit: This is my favorite video essay on content and humor and I've watched it like six times in the year and a half it's been out

I always understood imprinting to be a not-well-thought-out fantasy from the Ra's al ghul side; I remember as a kid imagining that I would turn 18 and have a perfect soul mate waiting for me to have a perfectly happy relationship with, so I understand where the fantasy of "I'll be there and be perfect for her" comes from, but the problem is that unless that person appears from thin air, there's no way for that to happen without undermining someone's autonomy and empowered consent, which is why it's a fine thing to doodle into your composition book but not to write as a piece of elaborate world building.

@ilexdiapason

2 жыл бұрын

i mean it could work out if you and the soulmate were, yknow, similar ages

Marcus is sad and wants to be dead because of the fact that his "mate" was killed by Aro because they were gonna run away together, and Aro didn't want Marcus to leave the Volturi because Marcus' power was too useful to lose. After Aro killed Marcus' mate (who was actually Aro's sister), Marcus was uber sad and depressed, but he stays in the Volturi because another Volturi member's (forgot her name but she was part of Victoria's coven for a while) power is the ability to create strong social ties with other people, so Marcus has an artificial social tie with the Volturi, and she he was excited to die because he gets to see his mate

@panicatthefallout7710

2 жыл бұрын

Why is every other story way more interesting than Edward and Bella's?

@soy6505

2 жыл бұрын

@@panicatthefallout7710 truer words have never been spoken: read the illustrated guide 🤪

@mophead_xu

2 жыл бұрын

wait what was marcus' power??

its so refreshing seeing someone whos actually read the books instead of being like “this doesnt make sense” even though it was explained in the books or even the movies and they just didnt pay attention like actual commentary on the books and movies is kinda rare compared to just ppl bagging on them for everything

11:53 the Victorious cut-ins for Victoria are unreasonably funny to me and i hate it

watching CJ defend some controversial shit no one's thought about for 10 years... do that To ME

You ripping the twilight poster in half and then just continuing on is just the epitome of the energy I come here for Also I will never get tired of hearing Renaissance referred to as different R words/names

It's rare for me to relate to a younger generational person. But the speed of your thoughts is something I have lived with all my life. Loved this.

You are a **delight** and I mean that in the most genuine and positive way possible. This was **glorious** and I can't wait to watch more of your videos. You are **unhinged** in the best way possible and your ideas are honestly very compelling (even though I don't really vibe with twilight so much).

@sagecolvard9644

4 ай бұрын

The emphasis asterisks made my brain read this in the Disco Elysium Electrochemstry voice.

Watching Carlisle die in theatres was the most rage I'd ever seen in public lol and then the vision reveal was the biggest audible gasp hahah

@doll_dress_swap1269

2 жыл бұрын

I love the energy it brought to the scene that clearly showed the writers were about to throw whatever the f@ck they wanted at the screen and made the whole scene so much more intense.

This video confirmed something I already loosely thought. The worst part of the story was the main three characters. There was a ton of cool, badass intrigue laden things in this story; Bella, Jacob, and Edward are not it.

@doll_dress_swap1269

2 жыл бұрын

Exactly. Stephanie Myer has a ton of amazingly creative ideas in her writing, but doesn’t seem to know how to explore them properly. I’d love to see her write something in horror or science fiction where she just unleashes her world building instead of making her bland romances the focus.

@michaelmayo2365

2 жыл бұрын

@@doll_dress_swap1269 I am reminded of the Anita Blake Vampire Hunter series. They start out as murder mysteries with a supernatural twist and a minor romantic subplot. As the series progresses and character relationships grow the romance take on a bigger role. That goes on until eventually they are an erotic supernatural romance series with a "whodunnit' subplot per book. That's not inherently a bad thing but felt like a rug pull for someone who was reading for different reasons. Honestly I'm not sure my point other than a series that built me up and left me disappointed.

@GlacialScion

2 жыл бұрын

The worst part for me is that they all manage to be interesting and avoid being insufferable when interacting with other characters in other contexts. It's literally just the insistence on a love triangle that ruins the series. Do something simple like make Jacob the gay best friend from the outset and the whole series potentially jumps in quality.

CJ is the only creator I will rewatch on .75 speed and personally I love that for us, like i need the manic energy of full speed to get the complete immersive experience but then i gotta slow it down to really chew on some ideas u kno

This channel is peak youtube