If you're looking for life advice, you've come to the right place!

@bowlcutgaming2030

4 жыл бұрын

jacksepticeye yep

@unclebacon0

4 жыл бұрын

Yeet, ok.

@650subsbeforetomorrow8

4 жыл бұрын

If you read this: Have a happy 2020!

@jamiejones5200

4 жыл бұрын

I want to be Irish show me the ways jack

@currieboz

4 жыл бұрын

Please bring back your old outro high fives all round *wapoosh wapoosh* and i will see all you dudes IN THE NEXT VIDEOOOO!

The actual quote: Shoot for the moon, if you miss, you will land on the stars *Jack* : "if i dont hit the stars then maybe ill go into porn, or somethin" 13:20

@doofenshmirtzevil

4 жыл бұрын

True words to live by. Schools doesn't teach you these smh

@lorcanbennett6486

4 жыл бұрын

The actual quote is the part one Jack's quote is part 2

@umbragon2814

4 жыл бұрын

Then you can still hit the stars

@emilyharfst6468

4 жыл бұрын

I thought it was “Shoot for the moon. Even if you miss, you’ll land among the stars.”

@umbragon2814

4 жыл бұрын

@@emilyharfst6468 "even if you land among the stars, you'll still be laughed at for somehow missing the Moon."

Jack chooses Evelyn Jack chooses to repeat partner path GAME: "So you have chosen death."

@eclipsewalkr

3 жыл бұрын

599 likes but no comments? First!

@eclipsewalkr

3 жыл бұрын

@Dounia Hadri Nice

“I think I’m making the same jokes” *two seconds later* “I’m picking the shoes so I can run away from my problems” *face palms*

@Hoomphrey

3 жыл бұрын

memento mori

@MJ-ku2nf

3 жыл бұрын

@@Hoomphrey Unus Annus

@Topazzzzzzz

Жыл бұрын

I was bout to say that lol

"We're born to die." **Unus Annus intensifies**

@maxtoogood5301

4 жыл бұрын

YES

@sage752

4 жыл бұрын

A man of culture

@coreythepeanut

4 жыл бұрын

Momento mori. Unus Annus.

@actuallya-proud-weirdo5946

4 жыл бұрын

DELETE THIS IN A YEAR-

@peachy_pluto5671

4 жыл бұрын

Y e s

Jack: *chooses random dates* Still gets Evelynn *Everyone liked that*

@martjosephsamson4509

4 жыл бұрын

may i know what the game is?

@always963

4 жыл бұрын

@@martjosephsamson4509 imagine life he said it in the start

@martjosephsamson4509

4 жыл бұрын

@@always963 i tend to skip the start after he says his intro, i didnt noticed😅

@thedingo23

4 жыл бұрын

Damn I was gonna comment that lol

@thekittysepticeye1o145

4 жыл бұрын

I NOTICED THAT!

This game: death is inevitable, nothing you do will stop it Me: *nervously laughs in unnus annus*

@MrBern-ex3wq

4 жыл бұрын

Unus Annus *_UNUS ANNUS_*

@sugarfreeskull3008

4 жыл бұрын

I LOVE THIS COMMENT WITH ALL OF MY BEING

@sinner9192

4 жыл бұрын

Karina Cat *uM nO tHaNks*

@dorianrobinette9712

4 жыл бұрын

*CLOCK TICKS AWAY UNTIL OUR INEVITABLE DOOM*

@williamnguyen2650

4 жыл бұрын

Unus Anus No not one year, one anus

Sean: *tries to get another partner* Game: “DoNt ChEaT oN hEr!!!”

"We are born to die" Unus annus Unus annus *unus annus* *_unus annus_*

@Red-jl1qr

4 жыл бұрын

What-- does that mean???

@Red-jl1qr

4 жыл бұрын

Nvm. I have officially joined the court. Thank you for enlightening me, friend. Unus Annus.

@ajhurtado5940

4 жыл бұрын

GODDAMMIT LAURENS! momento mori.

@kiwichan456

4 жыл бұрын

Unus Annus Unus Annus My bro joins chant: Unus Ainus

@giovannasall8552

4 жыл бұрын

Cue clock ticking

Jack: *gets Evelynn* Destiny!! Also Jack: *goes back on dating site* Evelynn: *angry tall Goddess noises*

@svidemic

4 жыл бұрын

ANGRY TALL GODDESS HAHAHAHAH

@googoogaga7986

4 жыл бұрын

LMAO

@inoacababat3686

4 жыл бұрын

Thats gold🤣🤣🤣

@mayomonkey7822

4 жыл бұрын

kinda weird calling this guy's girlfriend a "tall Goddess"

@Hellbrid

4 жыл бұрын

@@mayomonkey7822 no not really he called her that before.

"why is my ceiling dirty?" -Jacksepticeye 2020

@nerdfish7970

4 жыл бұрын

This is the first time I read 2020 and it’s really weird

@outlaworb_8115

4 жыл бұрын

k

@nova9477

4 жыл бұрын

@@nerdfish7970 I know, its weird XD

@SaltySeaSunbeam

4 жыл бұрын

I've always asked that about my house ceiling

@jaylanl2657

4 жыл бұрын

Lol

Jack: [doesn't even look when he swipes right on a girl named evelynn with the same hair as evelynn and the same complexion as eveynn] Jack: [chooses to spend the rest of his life with her without knowing she's evellyn] Jack: "EVELYNN! OH MY GOD!" evellyn downstairs: "SEAN ARE U OK WHAT'S WRONG???"

@Jackie-th4ph

4 жыл бұрын

BTF 😂😂😂😂

@nebby_ya_boi257

3 жыл бұрын

So that's how they got together

Jack: Looks away while swiping Evelyn Evelyn: *Sad Gamer Noises Also Jack: Accidentally clicks Evelyn Evelyn: *Confused Noises

Jack: puts American undies on baby Me: the birth of ricardo

@bloopitsbloob

4 жыл бұрын

I like you cause you got that something that I need in my life so give it to me

@complixe6731

4 жыл бұрын

@Karina Cat gtfo

@TheAlison1456

4 жыл бұрын

@@complixe6731 it's an upcoming game! How'd you know!?

@RicardoHernandez-sz2yp

4 жыл бұрын

Me huh tf

@ninjanippledog725

4 жыл бұрын

He didnt put it on, thats just the setting for no subtitles. And thats really gross to say about a baby

“There’s only so many brain calories I can burn in one day” “ why is my ceiling dirty”

@dannyvalido7408

4 жыл бұрын

Best line ever

Jack: "What's cool? ...Mathematics!" Me, a mathematics major: "You are wrong but okay"

@rainespiano

3 жыл бұрын

Math is cool wish I liked math

@Peperonia4ever

3 жыл бұрын

@@rainespiano It's never too late 😉

@bellag.8495

3 жыл бұрын

Bro im failing math

Jack: "Oh, I thought you were talkin about the s*x" Also Jack: "Upside-down helicopter style!!!!!!"

@gusep9169

3 жыл бұрын

J e s u s

“There’s just one road for all of us and it’s death” Jack I think you’ve been spending too much time on Unus Annus

I can just imagine Jack calling his kid tiny toddel man

@_DMNO_

4 жыл бұрын

@Anna May this seems legit

@SonnTero

4 жыл бұрын

@Alina Way nigga

@SonnTero

4 жыл бұрын

Boi

@itsray1878

4 жыл бұрын

Yeah

@flavorcrash3890

4 жыл бұрын

Or woman!

Game "do you have any regrets?" Jack "Do you have 90 minutes."

Jack: “What’s 7+2?” Me: “Pretty sure it’s ten...” Jack:”I think it’s 9 but let me get out the calculator.” Me: *wait*..... **recounts** “Damn it is 9”

@sircommentthecommenter4501

4 жыл бұрын

Wait if its 9+7 wouldn’t it be more or am I confused?

@leegreening5888

4 жыл бұрын

XD so me tbh, 😂😂👌

@charlotterhodes7359

4 жыл бұрын

@@sircommentthecommenter4501 *now I'm confused 😂*

@dkjcb3993

3 жыл бұрын

@@charlotterhodes7359 now we're all confused 🤔

“I just amazon primed a baby to my house” Not your first time I see..

"pinkie swear, nuclear warfare..." That escalated quickly

@mikekennedy4983

4 жыл бұрын

at least it almost rhymes though...

@zoedixon9737

4 жыл бұрын

@@mikekennedy4983 Oh yeah, I see it.

Nobody: Jack: this relationship is just like my relationship in real life Also jack: cheats on her immediately

"Why is my ceiling dirty?" Me at school looking at the ceiling instead of my work

seán: *swipes right on everything* game: *gives evelynn* seán: it was meant to be, this is true love.

Jack: "Now I don't feel like a complete total failure and fuck - up!" *Me, getting ready to whip out the love and support gun:*

Jack: picks Evellyn Also Jack: proceeds to continue knowing the gods are on his side

@lamecolt9323

4 жыл бұрын

Solomon Bardalez this type of comments are the fucking worst

@hazellevesque8809

4 жыл бұрын

@@lamecolt9323 chill dude, if you don't like it you don't have to be rude about it

No one: Jack: "Imma keep f*ckin' until a baby comes out"

@ameyagupta7285

4 жыл бұрын

Alyssa Cat thank you for your contribution

@itsray1878

4 жыл бұрын

Lmao

@X3NKU

4 жыл бұрын

Professor G yes because that’s how bebe is made

@LoveSylveon

4 жыл бұрын

He'll say it for the game but not for real life? *Sharpens knife* I can take Evelynn out the picture now... :)

@AversiveBison

4 жыл бұрын

Jack is just giving Evelyn a good time ;)

Sean: breaks crush’s ankle Also Sean: *sexually attracted to the teacher*

@MaxRamos8

4 жыл бұрын

Cmon man, everyone has had at least ONE teacher they had a crush on or sexually attracted to

@jakomioftherose2434

4 жыл бұрын

@@MaxRamos8 I wouldn't know; All my teachers were either male or old women.

@itsray1878

4 жыл бұрын

NO!

@JadenExclusives

4 жыл бұрын

Max Ramos I had a HAWT teacher and someone in my class was nutting in the lesson 🤣

@mattmccleskey9598

4 жыл бұрын

Look at teacher your ankles are in danger

BitLife: *Seán (as Paddy) commits crimes and suffers no consequences.* Imagine Lifetimes: *Seán commits crimes and suffers the consequences.*

Jack: *casually playing game* Also Jack: *looks up* Again, Jack: why is my ceiling dirty???

@Felix-bk2ux

3 жыл бұрын

IDK why but I laughed so hard at this

Sean: "Hey, Alexa. Deliver baby" My Alexa: *gets very confused and has an existential crisis*

@Corvus__

4 жыл бұрын

I prefer Google chrome.

@Corvus__

4 жыл бұрын

@@nickb.7307 No thanks. (uninstalls enternet explorer) Why is it even on here in the first place anyway?

@nickb.7307

4 жыл бұрын

@@Corvus__ u will suffer the consequences by the time 2018 starts

@TheJayzBlu4721

4 жыл бұрын

@@nickb.7307 Actually its 1885 my guy

@Corvus__

4 жыл бұрын

@@nickb.7307 What the... could've sworn I uninstalled this. (reunistalls enternet explorer and deletes bogus email)

Sean: * talks about death being inevitable * Comments: * *Unus Annus intesifies* *

@zozoparx

4 жыл бұрын

time is ticking!

@TheJayzBlu4721

4 жыл бұрын

Momento mori, unas annus

@xaninuax

4 жыл бұрын

Unus Annus

@chimkennungey8167

4 жыл бұрын

Momento Mori. Unus Annus.

@ramonlujan2377

4 жыл бұрын

WHATS UNUS ANNUS

"Upside down helicopter style" -Jack 2020

@wyattaward4368

3 жыл бұрын

Oh yeah

@Bubbline13

3 жыл бұрын

Just warning you im gonna mess up your 69 likes

@ajbraves6463

3 жыл бұрын

@@Bubbline13 You fool, for that comment was the only thing keeping 2021 from being hell on Earth. For all of this year's burdens should now be blamed on this individual alone, for they broke the sacred balance.

@wyattaward4368

3 жыл бұрын

@@ajbraves6463 I will keep the balance by unliking to continue a balance the original state

"I'm gonna choose the right life" *Kills everybody*

Just think about the smile on Evelynn’s face if she sees this

@Subuwu

4 жыл бұрын

Go to 5:37

@smilecomet6814

4 жыл бұрын

@@Subuwu yea I caught that hah, i was sad he didnt notice it the first time but it worked out anyways

@WorriedtheCircusDemon

4 жыл бұрын

@@smilecomet6814 I wanted him to notice but I looked and him and he wasn't looking at his screen XD I was so disappointed. Then I smiled again 10 seconds later.

Jack's title: I committed crimes Jack in the first minute: I'm gonna make sure I grow up right

Me:*watching Sean swiping right, sees the name Evelynn* Me: “ooh I hope one of the choices is evelynn!” Sean: *picks Evelynn* Sean: “it’s mean to be! True love does exist!” Me: “awwwwww”

@ch3rryhs527

4 жыл бұрын

lps Brooke 283 it was too adorable for my heart . makes me feel lonely

Jack: Let’s go with June. One of my favourite times in the year. Me: *cries in birthmonth*

jack: "june... summertime" me, an australian: scuse me?

@emisthem6562

4 жыл бұрын

I really had to think about this one and I feel like an idiot cause I'm Aussie too

@Mr0901

4 жыл бұрын

lemme help you ,,ǝɯᴉʇɹǝɯɯns ˙˙˙ǝunɾ,, :v

@emisthem6562

4 жыл бұрын

@@Mr0901 This is as annoying as it is amazingly funny - *VERY*

@Mr0901

4 жыл бұрын

@@emisthem6562 thanks I did my best

@drwalrus5943

4 жыл бұрын

It's always summertime in Australia. Even in winters it's warm enough to be classified as a British summer

*causally flicks by his girlfriend's name* "I'm gonna search for someone that is perfect for me" Awhh

@nathantaylor2026

4 жыл бұрын

Michelle Last as he also flicks everyone else

"Someone is growing up and throwing up as well" - Jack 2020

Title-"I Committed Crime And Suffered The Consequences " KZread- "Ah yes, gaming"

"May, oh you could go perfect with June!" Me, April: *cries in forgotten*

Me: "Alexa, deliver baby." Alexa: "Sorry; I don't know that."

@SammyGsings

4 жыл бұрын

Lol my Mjne said Me: Alexa deliver baby ALexa: just to confirm, you ant to hear the song baby by Justin Bieber? 😂😂😂

When he chose Evelynn, I no joke screamed

I love that Jack's reaction to the screams of child birth was "OH GOD I'M SORRY!"

@castiel8239

3 жыл бұрын

Imagine the husband in the hospital, holding his wife's hand... while they have a screaming match. The woman screams out of pain and her husband just screams "I'M SORRY!" over and over (since technically he is the cause of her pain because he impregnated her)

"There's just one road for all of us and it's death!!" Unus Annus Unus Annus! Unus Annus!! UNUS ANNUS!!!

@2axes1man97

4 жыл бұрын

@SleepyWolf unus anus

@maxtoogood5301

4 жыл бұрын

It's 3 times not 4 Maybe 2 Definitely not 4 Lmao

@Tortle4444

4 жыл бұрын

@@maxtoogood5301 I wasn't trying to do the intro to Unus Annus videos, I just was trying to make a funny comment

@maxtoogood5301

4 жыл бұрын

@@Tortle4444 lol k

@zackaelfweald4205

4 жыл бұрын

SleepyWolf um he did spell it right XD

Jack, if you do nothing at the “choose your path” area, you will get a secret ending called: “choosing not to choose is a choice”

@The-kr9rb

4 жыл бұрын

@Alina Way no

@bee_boy4110

4 жыл бұрын

Yes

@bee_boy4110

4 жыл бұрын

I want to see it

Game: What is love? Me : *excited twice noises*

The Game: Death is inevitable, nothing you do will stop it. * Unus Annus has entered the chat*

Sean: “ALEXA-“ My Alexa: “I DIDNT CATCH THAT”

@SaltySeaSunbeam

4 жыл бұрын

My friends alexa since he messed with it everytime you say alexa: what do you want you piece of shit (I have no idea how he did it)

@Corvus__

4 жыл бұрын

@@SaltySeaSunbeam I'd probably make mine sound like a grumpy old lady, if I actually used voice commands.

Jack making a baby: I’m having an existential crisis. Me: a big brain: EGGsistential crisis.

@minecraftegg3607

4 жыл бұрын

Egg

@trinity3631

4 жыл бұрын

@@minecraftegg3607 Jack calls you "TRASH!"

@R.Sinnia

4 жыл бұрын

An egg making egg pun is the last thing I have to see in my life.

@rseprdutions813

4 жыл бұрын

I will subscribe mighty egg

@SonnTero

4 жыл бұрын

@Alina Way nigga

Not me: Nobody: Jack: why is my ceiling dirty

Everybody gangsta till Jack does it upside down, helicopter-style

Jack: (chooses shoes like he did the 1st time.) Also jack: has the same reason the choose the shoes. To run away from his problems.

Sean: *Sexually attracts to the teacher* Me: *Go for it, Irish boy, go for it.*

@thiccychiccy1157

4 жыл бұрын

*becomes sexually attracted

@mrfaix4878

4 жыл бұрын

Keep the number of likes on this as 69

@Verxzye

4 жыл бұрын

@SwayyBopzz nobody asked

@MaxRamos8

4 жыл бұрын

Cmon man, everyone has had at least ONE teacher they had a crush on or sexually attracted to

@SonnTero

4 жыл бұрын

@@Verxzye so what does it matter? Did we ask for your input?

Jack: I'm included in top 10 gamers of the world me: Searches it **i Trust U MAN***

I love how jack wants to change partners, rejects everyone and basically gets the bad ending. The game just told him you are going to die alone.

"Hold on, our baby's loading." - Sean, 2020

@gamesfan290

4 жыл бұрын

and every other parent ever

This game is literally the most soul crushing game ever.

@cherkaouia5541

4 жыл бұрын

Just like life

@FireheadLazzo

4 жыл бұрын

And such bouncy music

@RicardoHernandez-sz2yp

4 жыл бұрын

True

Jack: Makes a perfect life TWICE Also Jack: Goes back and fucks it up BOTH TIMES

"What is cool...? Mathematics!" Me, majoring in math : *happiness noise*

Sean's title: "I COMMITED CRIME" "So the thing he said in Jump King was true" In Jump King: *grunts in frustration* "I'm GoNnA CoMmIt a M U R D E R"

Jack: “What is love?” Me: Baby don’t hurt me! Don’t hurt me! No more!

@Corvus__

4 жыл бұрын

🎵Oh-oo-woh-woh-woh, oh-woooooh-wooooooh!🎶

@seans.silly.little.life.

4 жыл бұрын

I DID THE SAME THING

@jamesofteamrocket

4 жыл бұрын

KatFullbuster my sentiments exactly

@hotasianboi2

4 жыл бұрын

OK boomer

"Oh, May! You'll go well with June!" Uhh, Jack. You do realise date aren't like Pokemon. You don't collect them. XD

"Jamantha, Jucifer"... I now know what I am going to name my kids. Thanks jack.

Jack wasnt even looking at the screen when he chose Evelyn both times

i won’t get “brain calories” out of my head anymore

@justaregulartoaster

4 жыл бұрын

You shouldn't, that's where they belong

@foxetfright9709

4 жыл бұрын

I'm losing brain cells Help

this is Jack's way of telling us he's having a baby soon

@sopranos8961

4 жыл бұрын

Klouse idk

@mandarinablue8438

4 жыл бұрын

Hmmm...I press x for doubt

Well now we know if Jack try to cheat on Evelyn he will instantly die

Someone: what's that on your face? Jack: it's just my face

Alexa: "According to Wiki-how, if you don't have access to a phone, and you must deliver a baby yourself..."

"Lambs fit for slaughter" could be an awesome metal band name.

Jack: I know what the meaning of life is! Me: **what is my life flashbacks** seems legit :D

@katherinehalling6630

4 жыл бұрын

Your profile pic is really cute, what's it from?

Jack in Emily is away too: dates Evelyn Jack in real life: dates Evelyn Jack in imagine lifetimes: dates Evelyn EVELYNSEPTION

@gemmasambridge4839

4 жыл бұрын

They're all spelt different tho :'(

@ameliamangham4460

4 жыл бұрын

Gemma Sambridge I know I just spelt them all same here for the joke 😂😂

@gemmasambridge4839

4 жыл бұрын

@@ameliamangham4460 oh😂

@gemmasambridge4839

4 жыл бұрын

My name is Evelyn so everytime Seán says it I get CHILLS 😂😂

@shadow_leaf7965

4 жыл бұрын

I was literally whispering Evelyn under my breath and then he chose her. I cheered then remembered everyone is asleep

No one: Jack: “Imma keep f*cking until a baby comes out”

@gamesfan290

4 жыл бұрын

me: fair enough...

8:48 “ imma keep f*cking until a baby comes out” -Jack 2020

14:22 as LTT fan, I love how you include this

"I'm very glad I became a crime daddy" -Sean 2020

“I commuted crime and I have to suffer the consequence” I’m still in a chase with the FBI

@leytonplayz2822

4 жыл бұрын

@ThatRandomandWeird Gryffindor I subscribe to him for no reason

@Alooftoken

4 жыл бұрын

Wheeze

16:19 NOOOO little potato man you always were my favorite 😔

Everyone: I won't be sexually attracted to my teacher. 2nd grade teacher Everyone: FFFUCK

He swipes Evelynn without even noticing and gets her😂..true love be like

“Looks like your past caught up with you” So did the fbi

@Corvus__

4 жыл бұрын

FBI: FBI OPEN UP! Me: (presses trapdoor button) Floor beneath the FBI: (opens up)

@anthonylesley982

4 жыл бұрын

Yes

@LavenderLullabies

4 жыл бұрын

Onision is that you? //shot

Hearing that Evelynn has moved in and they have a cat together. (I like most animals so even if they had a dog or turtle or something,Id still be like "Awww") makes my heart soar... Seriously.. So happy for you two. :-D

You are important, every step you take can completely change the course of time and open up another multiverse to show every other thing you could have done, every particle you move can completely change history and the future without you having any direct correlation

Jack: "Imma keep f***ing until a baby comes out!" Best sentence of 2020 so far I think.😂

@nicke.8622

4 жыл бұрын

@Anna May plz get some help

@stephanieadams7838

4 жыл бұрын

Yea

@Brandon11746

4 жыл бұрын

lol 😂

@Alex-ze5fe

4 жыл бұрын

Hahgadgsfsaaaa

Sean: chooses a girlfriend and calls her jamantha Game: the girl's name is evelynn Sean: happy irish noises

jack:leans back " AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!! " me: "you alright?" jack:"why is my ceiling dirty?" me:"OH NO THE CEILING!"

Eighteen minutes and forty nine seconds of pure misery and dread. Love that for me.

Jack: I committed a crime Me: well wouldn’t be his first

@dianamaioru497

4 жыл бұрын

The crime of stealing my heart with his kindness! ;)

Jack: Does original intro Me: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

@2dheethbar

4 жыл бұрын

Now, we just need the original outro and life will be better again.

@ayitsalex2893

4 жыл бұрын

@@2dheethbar yes, but it will be a cold day in hell when he's gonna do it

@2dheethbar

4 жыл бұрын

@@ayitsalex2893 In the words of Fox Moulder, "I want to believe..."

@marley4071

4 жыл бұрын

@@2dheethbar ONG like i heard him while talking to my sister and said "SHH...wait..*rewinds video, hears him do intro* HOLY FUCKING IRISH BALLS"

I love how this video is just jack having an existential crisis this entire video, and so am I I need a therapist please help

Thank you Jack you have helped me go thru a lot of stuff that I do not want to say so thank you

No one: Me waiting year on year for the next episode of Mr President: “You’re wasting your time”.

@mrtraver4816

4 жыл бұрын

Thanks for correcting me I mean it

@anthonylesley982

4 жыл бұрын

Same

“I wanna commit a war crime. This is going incredibly well” -Jacksepticeye 2020

ok everytime i watch jacksepticeyes videos i jump and i don't know why but i love it 😍

It’s 1:00am where I am, and I just thought, you know what would be great. A Jacksepticeye H2ODelirious collaboration. It is all I want now