Stop caring for them and care for yourself. What a great message.

I have handed them over to the wrath of God and no longer think about their existence. They’re in my prayers and not my thoughts.

@LurkingLinnet

Жыл бұрын

Proud of you

@manknowsnothing3796

Жыл бұрын

Thats deep!

@4Mikes4Mindset4

11 ай бұрын

Vengeance is mine sayeth the Lord. Amen.

@latenightvibes9213

10 ай бұрын

Wow. I needed this. Thank you.. seriously

@aleynamutlu4206

10 ай бұрын

Amen.

Never unblock then after blocking. I made this mistake and the abuse was 10x worse. They deserve to be blocked forever. Act like you don't know them.

@lovelyangel743

11 ай бұрын

Know that you don't know them. To much of a problem.😮

@nvk743

11 ай бұрын

Yes I've heard they punish you for leaving in the first place after you come back after no contact. Punishment always follows

@Inzpectre

10 ай бұрын

​@@nvk743Did yours ever bring up a topic you find sensitive on purpose, and pretend to have an extreme opinion just to try to make you mad at them? Mine did this all the time... she pretended to be sexist anti man all men die whatever so that she would get a reaction. But what i never understood was why she hated men so much considering all her fake victim stories were about her mother and grandmother and auntie abusing her, and her dad being the nice one who "saved her"... Nothing added up. She would tell me her ex abused her, (who she was with while with me), and to him that i abused her, to make us hate each other for her... we were literal puppets, its insane how easy it is for them

@ainahaga

8 ай бұрын

Yeah and they also start to look older😳😳😳😳 its insane…… i thought i was hallucinating but I think it is real. The demon shows in them…..

@stevenkovler5133

8 ай бұрын

Tell me about it

There is no defeating a narcissist, and because they can't be wrong the only way to escape and survive a narcissist is to leave and never look back.

@chrismc410

4 ай бұрын

There is a way. It's called a gun.

@tenningale

Ай бұрын

Yep, then they go off and be a victim. Then the smear campaign narrative is that you're cold, distant, have bad social skills, don't care about other people, etc. And any other personal information or emotions/reactions that they can weaponize against you. Absent that, they just make it up.

@LaMesaC

Ай бұрын

​@chrismc410 😂 we don't want to see you on the news, k? It's tempting but let someone else..another narcissist do it. They go for that kind of thing.

Oh, this is so difficult for an empath. It takes so much effort to stop caring. I've noticed that if they notice your "indifference", they go ballistic guiltripping us.

@fluffytail6355

10 ай бұрын

My colleague turned up the “charm” on me when he saw that I was completely indifferent and cold to him. No one else can see his tactics - so frustrating - they treat him like he walks on water (and that I am the villain)

@MrMasterDebate

9 ай бұрын

When my grandmother couldn’t lie about being “poor” to get my disability check … and I never offered to hand her money, she lost her god dam mind telling others I didn’t love her. Funny enough she wanted desperately to hide the claim she was making, that she was poor.

@killadjango6995

9 ай бұрын

💯💯💯🎯

@pamkay1756

7 ай бұрын

Yes.

@pamkay1756

7 ай бұрын

​@@MrMasterDebatecan be poor but it's your money. What a creep.

If you ask a covert male narc to be accountable, they turn nasty on you. If you ignore them they still nasty. There's no end to their nasty underhanded ways.

@sharonparis8916

Жыл бұрын

Can’t seem to break them or get them to do what you think or really what the marriage needs: time, affection, attention, date nights,communication, doing things together. They are difficult!

@courtneymeyers82

Жыл бұрын

Yes, they'll stalk you sometimes, give you a sign they've been there, break in, hack, take pics without you knowing Block them on phone, social media, maybe talk to your boss, cops, record, document, consult with an attorney

@rickylazarus4944

Жыл бұрын

You have to make your mind up! I’ve you except this behaviour or not. If not you have to go your separate ways 🫶🏽🙏🏽😁

@KyraSimoneofficial

Жыл бұрын

It’s exhausting

@sidewind47

Жыл бұрын

Well shit, yes it is, i've been experiencing it live with covert narcs. They were like cartoon villain that even they've been epic failed today, no matter how hard hit they are being backfire by their own stupid games, they keep persistent trying to comeback by tommorrow, maybe not the day after, it could be weeks, or month, depend on how much they learned about us and feel confident enough to do the execution

Yes. He would get mad at me when I tried to very nicely explain my feelings and he'd somehow flip it around on me. It was a total mind f*ck.

@carlosrios8920

11 ай бұрын

I understand how you feel. Pray + be strong!

@leyapriya9323

10 ай бұрын

Yes that's what the situation I'm going through now

@senges6751

10 ай бұрын

This exactly happened to me. I told him nicely that I would appreciate more communication and he went 180 on me, shouting,demeaning and blaming me.

@rebeccak315

10 ай бұрын

@@leyapriya9323 Same

@marlaglomann2800

9 ай бұрын

😢😢

What helps to be indifferent - always try to see them for who they are, not who are they pretending to be. If you see a monster, you will see it, even when it is crying.

@francalatona591

7 ай бұрын

That's right...When they show who they are, believe them.

@Nadah7

6 ай бұрын

What has helped me was learning about limerence. I was stuck in limerence with them. Once I stopped fantasizing because fantasizing was never reality with them. I was about to see past the rose colored glasses. It was a deathly painful reality

@tad1111

6 ай бұрын

This is very true. It can be very hard but it works.

@Leelee-op7vj

6 ай бұрын

And not who you want them to be cuz will never happen.

Emotional indifference ...it 's true !

So true. I figured it out and left the clown 🤡

@Leelee-op7vj

6 ай бұрын

Me too. Knew from the start and never lost myself but it did cause me astonishment which makes your head spin how the clown can be. I visualized being without the fool, me and my daughter in a nice place and it became a self fulfilling prophecy cuz my dreams came true.

@LaMesaC

Ай бұрын

​@@Leelee-op7vj😊

I WISH I KNEW THIS FIFTY YEARS AGO THESE NARCOPATHS ARE COMPLETE SICKOS PERIOD

Best time of my life was the second he pushed too far for the final time because when he did it I physically felt the last drop of feeling I had for him flow through and out of my body.

@LaMesaC

Ай бұрын

THIS RIGHT HERE!!

I wish i knew more about covert narcissists before i got with my ex. I apologized for things i had to reason apologizing for.

It’s been 3.5 years since I blocked her and she’s tried contacting me with different numbers and I blocked those too. The best response to a narc is silence, drives them crazy.

@melissabyrd1310

6 ай бұрын

maybe change your number

Exactly!! You are so accurate in all your videos! I’m sorry for you that you are an expert because of your own suffering with your parents. You have paid a price to be the expert. You are an expert and so articulate in exposing narcissism. Thank you for using your terrible experiences to help all of us trying to understand the covert way we are being exploited and find our way to freedom. God bless you Danish!

@iamaleo247

Жыл бұрын

Beautifully said.🙏🏽♥️

@MarlanaMartin

8 ай бұрын

Agreed! This man is changing and blessing my life!😊❤

I M OUT OF NARCCIST. THEY MADE ME ENGLITHEN. THANK U NARCCIST 💓

@HeartOfTheSource

5 ай бұрын

Stronger now because I choose to be. They were a catalyst that's about it. Violent catalysts....

In their mind they think they have to win, how could they ever admit they're wrong about anything.? They're too selfish for that

Its the coldness that did it for me It was so obvious that she knew she messed up when she went cold “Im sorry YOU feel that way” to something she did for the hundredth time Didnt answer for three days and watched her start “apologizing” right away and tried come up with whatever she could to get me to stay when before she “didnt care” it was like she drained the love out but tried to force it back down my throat. Like i would chow down on what i had already threwn up no thank you there were so many chances to change and to apologize

YEAH THEY PUT ON THEIR CROCODILE TEARS

I abandoned myself for twenty years, caring for someone who never cared for me. I stopped doing that and now I feel great. I decided to take care of myself

The Covert N told me that "It's just SO Hard to Care about someone like me." Oh my. Now decades in I say, It's not that someone can't care about you, it's they realize that you don't care about them and then they give up on the idea.

@LaMesaC

Ай бұрын

So true!

Yes! Detach- pull back- repeat!

Become nonchalant, poker face. I love it, you can see the panic in their eyes and face. They can’t push your buttons and they can tell their time is up, the spell is broken. Remember “stick and stone break bones, but words will never hurt me” you have to live by this code!!! 🫶🏽🙏🏽😁

@tenningale

Ай бұрын

Sad, but I've been a poker face with my narc parents since before I can remember. 20+ years before I ever knew anything about narcissism or Gray Rock. Narcs weaponize all personal information and any emotions and reactions against you, so you learn to be very private and unemotional around them (and people you don't know).

Right! However, it also enrages them that you don’t react. They will accuse you of acting superior.

@susanfisher3655

10 ай бұрын

And? That is their problem, not yours. Indifference, my friend, leaves nothing for them to prey upon.

@waynerandles6126

10 ай бұрын

In many ways you are Superior 🤗

@francalatona591

6 ай бұрын

That happen to me. I asked the narc to take of something that needed us both to agree on, and they did with no problem, (so they made it appear at time.) Next day, I was being accused of being "spoiled"..WHAT! I thought. I just let them go into their empty pointless remarks with no reaction from me. That was the end of it.

@LaMesaC

Ай бұрын

OH HOW FITTING!!😂 THEY DO THAT TO US! THE IRONY😂!😊

@LaMesaC

Ай бұрын

​@@waynerandles6126YES!!

Give them nothing let them grasp at thin air 😈

Why are you always spot on?? Lol Free from my Narc after 26 years of absolute domination, manipulation and mind control. Honestly it’s only a miracle I’m still alive!

@Selenitemoon820

5 ай бұрын

Glad you are out of it! 👏🏻

true ! narcissist have world of their own and suck us in without our realization

Agreed! My narcissist wants me to do things that I don't want to do, so I now say straight up that I refuse to so-and-so, and he shuts down. It's like he doesn't understand every time. He actually walks away or does something nice for me for once!

@haddytaal1293

8 ай бұрын

That's love bombing to start the abuse circle all over again. Narcs always have an ulterior motive to their niceness. It's to keep you on the hamster wheel period.

You really must have gone through a lot to know this much, Danish.❤

Walk away.

After going no contact with my narc mother, today I went to that house to bring all my things from there. This was the exact reaction of her; she cried like a victim. My cousin who accompanied me watched the whole drama.

For all these time, I thought he really didn't understand things, and thought he was really vulnerable, didn't know what he did hurt other people, and I played 'parent' towards him, gave him the unconditional love, and explained and taught things to him, and at the same time allowed his double standard and allowed his abuse towards me. Until towards the end of the relationship, I realized that he understood everything, he just manipulated me playing victim!!! He got my empathy and care while doing things hurtful towards me. I have neglected my own feelings to empathize toward the fake him!!

@uboots

Жыл бұрын

Wow, thanks. Just figured out that's me and my husband. In our first months of marriage I cried all night and he had no idea why I was crying but coldly told me to try and get sleep... He didn't even want to know why I'm crying??? Could not pat me on the back! Could not show any concern, just started snoring... When I bought this up he made out like he just didn't know that you're supposed to comfort people who cry... He said his parents left him to manage his own feelings and I fell for it. I feel like such an idiot and so hurt that I have to have the big D word on my life now (divorce) because of this asshole.

@octavia9464

10 ай бұрын

​@@ubootsI know just what you mean!! I'm in the same way!!! Same circumstance!!! 😮🙄

Wow. You speaking to me directly on this one. I'm truly trying to practice this with my mil. I can't take her antics anymore. Thank you

You've described my former husband of 18 years to a tee. That narcissist got more supply from me than I care to think about, and long after we were divorced. And, Danish, you are right. He played on my sympathies at every turn. In his words, his parents turned him into an emotional cripple, his father never loved him, his mother tormented him, ripped him emotionally, then, bought him things to make up for it. He wanted to eat out all the time, buy new vehicles, buy clothing and shoes from the mall, he wanted gaming computers to distract himself from the unbearable emotional pain. I cannot BELIEVE how much money I sunk into his recreational lifestyle before I came to.

I've watched this many times as this is really how it is...

Great advice. I did that a few months ago and I'm really seeing great results.

They bait you into their trap...Don't fall for it, & DON'T FEEL GUILTY ABOUT IT!

Masters at tears-on-demand to guilt-trip the victim. I am now indefferent and learning how to be unoffendable.

Yes my father and brother are the true examples I'm still stuck here but I am keeping my faith in god and doing action to get out of it soon

@katyb2793

6 ай бұрын

God will comfort you and guide you, even in the smallest details. I'm praying for you 🙏💕

I’m so tired 😢

@melissabyrd1310

6 ай бұрын

SAME

@KyraSimoneofficial

6 ай бұрын

@@melissabyrd1310😢

I have to listen to this every day.

My husband is a narcissist …. I’m getting fed up by him everyday.

He's whimpering right now and trying to give me the silent treatment

@Hazelnut3988

6 ай бұрын

Except n leave soon as possible before he drains the life energy out of u n then that trauma bond is going to form the longer u stay run away

6 years stuck in a loop with that selfish, manipulative monster. Been rid of him for 6 months now. Life is beautiful again. I have hope and happiness and my health back again. It didn't just happen overnight. I had to heal, work on boundaries and realize and accept that he was preying on my compassion. Don't know where he is, but I know he's making himself and those around him deeply miserable. Not my concern anymore though. I'm stronger, tougher, smarter and more self compassionate. I put my wellbeing first.

Caring is the path to righteousness.

@js13291

2 ай бұрын

You must be a narcissist as well who wants ppl to care for you so you can manipulate them.😂

100% true. This should be tought to kids in schools!

This is beyond true .

Thank you. It's very hard. But you know that. I am getting better at it. There are so many people like that out there.

True They will also deflect blame They will gossip mercilessly about others and tell u how others hate and resent you only to cover theor own tracks 👣. It keeps u busy from holding them accountable for their crimes against you

What an exact description of a covert's response... then ...when you least expect it... they will attack you...they wait... they don't want you to connect the attack with your sin of indifference to which they whined and played you... and then you responded with something conciliatory... but later, they will HAVE to viciously punish you for "nothing out of the blue"... that's how they make you crazy. Best thing you can do is get away.

I needed to hear this.

When they start the crying. I tell my covert narcissist mother that her crying doesn't work .all her drama don't work and that she knows what she does

Thanks Danish!!❤⚘ So cruel! So evil!😮😮😮

Never again. Me first.. bye, God bless.

I Left Him last October! 😅 A New Church with refreshing loving new people!

Stopping caring is the easiest part for me, leaving isn’t. He moved me to another country, and now I’m stuck😭

True that! Facts! Once u are done it is so easy to do. Peace love and blessings ❤❤❤

INDIFERENCE n ALL WAYS ALWAYS, yeh buddy💯

I stopped caring but still working to care less each day

only beings that didnt hurt me ever is animals, they love me more when i do something for them... humans even your kid can turn around and stab you straight in the heart

Well said and to the point!

Thank you so much! I needed to hear this.

Sometimes we can’t leave them. What we can do is train ourselves to deal with them. Amor fati. (Love your fate). No great lesson comes easy, sorry. This didn’t happen to me, it happened for me, to learn from. If you’re grateful of the lessons then you’re definitely on the right path.

@sharonparis8916

Жыл бұрын

Thank you so much great point.

@lindacasey5016

Жыл бұрын

Thank you for this take. You're right sometimes we can't leave. When there is any indication of that happening, I suddenly & inexplicably can't get to any of the money. It's been moved, passwords have been changed. Even on accounts in my name.

@lydiawhitting5406

Жыл бұрын

@@lindacasey5016It's fraudulent to tamper with others accounts. He obviously knows how to access .. maybe via your phone. Can u go to your bank with your ID and report that you didn't change your password ?

@lydiawhitting5406

Жыл бұрын

The only greater lesson for me was to understand fully, how others have and are suffering from this as well.. both friends and close family. It is very painful for me to witness in full knowledge. I pray their eyes open, and can get away, before they are completely devoured.

@aklev5745

Жыл бұрын

Yes

Such a short video, but probably the best one on the internet to easily expose how narcs work

Sooo true about their victim- hood & crying & sucking us right back in by preying on our emotions.

Thats why I said NO CONTACT blocked everyone thats done me bad. F em I'm happier without them. 💯

The best message ever!!! big ❤and respect for this man.

My moms is 74 and I talk with her daily, I’ve tried for years to heal our discord. She finally quit drinking at the beginning of the year, and we were healing and was having a great relationship. But she fell off recently and started attacking me again with emotional abuse. She’s always hides and lies about drinking. Every time I tell how her actions make me feel. She changes the subject by shaming me and if that doesn’t work she plays the victim.

This is the best advice, I'm doing this now. It's hard but it is very effective.

THANKYOU DANISH ONCE AGAIN ANOTHER VIDEO FULL OF KNOWLEDGE AND WISDOM 😘💖🌸

When I ran from my NARC I was asked by the police and housing people by if he was ever violent, I would always say no; the reaction was something of disbelief, but hearing you say that they become the victim is so like him. I'm so glad that you said this publicly; I just hope the authorities hear this and don't judge the REAL victim.

Thank you so much! Your information here is exactly what I'm dealing with. You are so knowledgeable and explain this so well!! This helps!

Go through enough abuse, and you will naturally stop giving an F.

Danish Bashir, thanks for your educational experience and resources and support Narcissistic awareness. GOD-BLESS.

They’re actions are akin to a newborn baby; when you stop caring for you & care for them; however, since they’re adults, Danish says to do it the other way around. Got it!

Lol. You need to start selling action figures or stickers with your face on them with those exact pair of glasses that just say, “stop caring for them.” Maybe it will finally get through to our think empathetic skulls. Because honey, telling me to stop caring when I am an empath, is like telling a fish to stop swimming. 😅

I will as of today bury my consideration towards him totally

Ugh... if only it where that easy. For me, I just end up looking petty or sour when I'm indifferent.

Geez that makes me feel like the Narc? Mine rages anytime I point anything out

I cannot thank you enough for this. I’m a Borderline in a relationship with a covert narcissist and it’s a DOOZY. Sometimes I need clear reminders.

Omg this is soooo trueee😳😳😳🤕🤕🤕🤕.... This is soo scary..people are soo scaryy... I have experienced all these worse of worse in my life..

@Trisof88

7 ай бұрын

Think of the world in terms of: prey vs predators, givers vs takers, compassion vs manipulation, good vs evil

They blame shift every mistake they make. They'll then shame you for confronting them about something they've very clearly done.

iam an INFJ who was raised by an Overt Narc Dad and a caring mum, due to the INFJ part iam very picky about a Partner and i actually fell for a Cover Narc Co-Worker... life seems to hate me, i fell for her because we seemed very similar (introverted and maybe even cold but humble) it was quite harsh, but she actually slipped her mask pretty fast, took me only 3 months to discover that she's not the Person that she's selling to others, it still makes me pretty sad, since i thought i found a possible Partner, to only then fight a war....

@chuhwey3632

Жыл бұрын

A lot of INFJ appear in these channels. The issue I see with your type is a consistent self victimhood mentality and lack of accountability. You can say the other person is a POS. For they might be. But you dated them. Abuse is a two way street. Infjs finding an abusive unhealthy person while being perfect empaths arent a thing. It only confirms you're manipulative and off in your own way...

@HIIMUsc

Жыл бұрын

@@chuhwey3632 i can see where you're coming from, i fell for her because we were pretty similar behaviour wise (the motivations behind it are different tho) and well, she's beautiful too, she also was on her best behaviour, so it was pretty hard to unmask her for quite some time.... this comment was more of a coping-comment, have a good one!

they exploit my feelings of guilt and my fawn response that I'm healing from in order to try and fill the space or empathise, the last guy I gave my heart to did this to me and my Mother has done this to me my entire life.

So right ‼️

When I show indifference to her frantic ranting she calls me a zombie and says she’s going to tell everyone I’m abusing drugs. (she knows that’s a lie) Mmkay. Go ahead. 😅

This is my mom and my ex boyfriend. They abuse my kind heart and want me to feel guilty. I won't feel guilt anymore. They did me so bad, I'm gonna be cold towards them now. I need respect and real love. Praying God to send me a real man that really loves me and respects me! ❤🙏🏻

would playing to their ego be effective? e.g. agreeing to their grandiosity and explaining to them they deserve someone better so you can run!

@louisegarner8888

11 ай бұрын

No, they'll just get you to agree to things and if you don't they'll rage. There's no escape as they loop, repeat patterns, they have irreparable brain damage. If you leave you'll be scapegoated, if you stay you'll eventually leave anyway but with your soul in tatters. Just bite the bullet and leave, quietly.. plan ahead.. and block them on everything, never go back as they can't love and never change, if they tell you any different it's just more lies. Focus back on you till you get yourself back, it takes time so the sooner you do it the better for you.

I dont think there is only one goat available, there are millions😂😂

Covert Narcissism is the WORST NARCS THE WORST RUN RUN RUN

“Weaponizing” is a key word with these trolls. The one I was married to weaponized everything from “shared” decisions, to my own vulnerabilities, to therapy.

I cried when I learned about Narcissists and the one video that spoke to me, a woman describing Narcissistic mothers. I can never have a conversation with her. I have to walk on eggshells. If I say something wrong, she gets mad. Has temper tantrums. It’s better to avoid some topics. I try to have minimal conversations with them. I need to be on my own. I heard about the Human Magnet Syndrome and how because of my parents, I attract these people to no end. I had to realize my kids father is one too. I think he’s the in the closet type because, I did find things. He probably hates me for not being stupid and find out crap. I have no wool over my eyes. I will find out. I’m not happy that it’s obvious now my children are pawns. They are being used like pawns. He puts me in a situation and now I feel I’ve been robbed from being a mother to them. But I don’t want to think about it.

The best advice ever. Thanks so much.

After explaining to MIL why she needed to stop screaming for her son while he was working (on conference call with boss, during Covid in our home) that I was the only reason why she was allowed to stay & he didn't want her there.. She screamed Unfair!!!!!!

Cute hair cut and beard!!best look and style on u!!!!

Yes figured this out a year ago. He’s still chasing as we speak smh 🤦🏽‍♀️nope I’m good! ✌🏽

Thank you! I'm sharing this with my son!

Around the 10 year mark of our 18 year so-called marriage, after years of criticizing, belittling, public humiliating, and viciously threatening to divorce me, during another futile argument, again, for the hundredth time, he threatened divorce. I replied, "Notice I'm no longer crying." He was stunned into silence. I should've divorced him right then and there. Actually, I should've never married him. I was a single parent, broke, lonely and had ended a 12 year relationship with another malignant narcissist six years before with whom I had a child, number 2 knew it, so skipped the love bombing phase entirely, and launched straight into spending both our salaries on himself. Fool that I was, self esteem at an all-time low, I married him anyway. Lesson learned.

Narc friend feels like texting me all day as a way to occupy my mental space ! It’s so annoying

I tried to do this to my husband, he said I didn't care and ,how could I not care 😂 . LEAVE ZERO WIGGLE ROOM!!!