Healing the Inner Child: Erikson's Eight Stages of Man

Counselor Carl (serenityonlinetherapy.com) explains the work of the great developmental psychologist, Erik Erikson, whose 1950 book Childhood and Society laid out his theory of the eight stages of human psychosocial development. He then uses Erikson's model to explain how when childhood needs are not met, children can develop shame, guilt, fear, and mistrust, which can significantly affect them as adults with respect to career, relationships, and emotional regulation. And finally, he explains how these needs can be met in adulthood through the process of "reparenting the wounded child." Counselor Carl's straight-forward teaching style makes complex concepts easy to understand. Counselor Carl is a licensed, professional counselor with more than 20 years of clinical experience both online and face-to-face.

Пікірлер: 64

  • @stephanienelson1381
    @stephanienelson13815 жыл бұрын

    Yeah. Now you can understand why so many people struggle with anxiety and depression! Great video;)

  • @Serenityonlinetherapy

    @Serenityonlinetherapy

    5 жыл бұрын

    Thank you!

  • @rhondabaroli2683

    @rhondabaroli2683

    3 жыл бұрын

    I understand but you can't stay there ..serenity prayer we can't fix everyone precious one but we can help our young ones we can help our self we can surround our self wth good energy we can't change the past or humans we can choose gratitude kindness and many good things .and in our living room my ma had poem children learn what they live . Bad childhood affect people different ..I was lucky my parents learned from it and Gained wisdom !

  • @jasedavies9288
    @jasedavies92882 жыл бұрын

    This is amazing stuff they should teach this in school

  • @reinar915
    @reinar9153 жыл бұрын

    I watched a couple of your video's now and you explain it in such a calm and non-judgmental way. Thank you so much! 💜

  • @Serenityonlinetherapy

    @Serenityonlinetherapy

    3 жыл бұрын

    You're welcome, Reina, and thank you! Best wishes!

  • @AKHZ
    @AKHZ Жыл бұрын

    Thank you Dr. Carl for your presence and beautiful contribution. Best wishes 🤲💖🌷

  • @Serenityonlinetherapy

    @Serenityonlinetherapy

    Жыл бұрын

    You're welcome!

  • @tl5404
    @tl54042 жыл бұрын

    Carl, your explanation is so concise, easy to understand and well thought. Thank you very much for your videos. Please keep them coming.

  • @Sereneis
    @Sereneis9 ай бұрын

    Not only depression and anxiety, but also personality disorders and mental illness. I was severely mentally abused by my parents and thru epigenetics turned out bipolar. My little brother is a narcissist, ss a response to trauma. I am 70 yrs old, with mental help for the last 50 yrs. You have helped me today with my codependence. I will look into your website. Thank you for your great help.

  • @Serenityonlinetherapy

    @Serenityonlinetherapy

    9 ай бұрын

    You're welcome! I wish you the best.

  • @christinabutterfield1801
    @christinabutterfield18014 жыл бұрын

    This is very insightful! I'll have to bring this up to my counselor. You've earned yourself a subscriber!

  • @Serenityonlinetherapy

    @Serenityonlinetherapy

    4 жыл бұрын

    Hi, Brandon. I'm glad you found the video helpful. Best wishes!

  • @carilocascio
    @carilocascio3 жыл бұрын

    Thank you Carl for your calm, didactic and clear explanations. I learned that I am a codependent a couple of months ago and following your advice, I am reading and watching videos and learning as much as I can to understand how I feel. I also have a counsellor. What I have found is that codependency can be connected to narcissistic abuse and inner child need to heal as well. I will visit your page. Thanks again! Hugs!!

  • @Serenityonlinetherapy

    @Serenityonlinetherapy

    3 жыл бұрын

    Hi, Carina. Thank you for sharing. I wish you the best on your journey to your True Self.

  • @iw9338
    @iw93386 жыл бұрын

    Wow, I failed in all of the stages, scarey

  • @Serenityonlinetherapy

    @Serenityonlinetherapy

    6 жыл бұрын

    I W. Don't be discouraged. At least now you know some of the things you need to work on. Healing is possible.

  • @fredmiami

    @fredmiami

    3 жыл бұрын

    Don't worry God loves you.

  • @darinsmith2458
    @darinsmith2458 Жыл бұрын

    I can relate to all of this.. It makes sense why things don't seam to work out..

  • @dreamiedips8624
    @dreamiedips86242 жыл бұрын

    Thanks Counselor Carl.💙💫✨

  • @delphinium5555
    @delphinium55553 жыл бұрын

    Excellent

  • @guptajimohan7255
    @guptajimohan72552 жыл бұрын

    Great Understanding very very Useful for healing Innerchild wounds 👍 thank you so much

  • @Serenityonlinetherapy

    @Serenityonlinetherapy

    2 жыл бұрын

    You're welcome, Mohan!

  • @Everything-dr1wb
    @Everything-dr1wb10 ай бұрын

    Thank you for sharing 👂👍💯

  • @lifelearner45lloyd97
    @lifelearner45lloyd975 жыл бұрын

    Thanks!

  • @Serenityonlinetherapy

    @Serenityonlinetherapy

    5 жыл бұрын

    You're welcome!

  • @alyarali5112
    @alyarali51126 жыл бұрын

    Thank you for the amazing priceless information!

  • @Serenityonlinetherapy

    @Serenityonlinetherapy

    6 жыл бұрын

    Alper Yarali You're welcome!

  • @Serenityonlinetherapy

    @Serenityonlinetherapy

    5 жыл бұрын

    You're welcome! Attending Al-Anon for three years changed my life. It taught me self-care. Best wishes!

  • @nancydecosta8577
    @nancydecosta8577 Жыл бұрын

    True

  • @theslopchop
    @theslopchop3 жыл бұрын

    Carl you are awesome my friend ❤️

  • @Serenityonlinetherapy

    @Serenityonlinetherapy

    3 жыл бұрын

    Thank you!

  • @elarakamai
    @elarakamai5 жыл бұрын

    Carl, I and a fellow counselor developed what we thought was an innovative therapeutic methodology back in the 80s based on this same structure. However we avoided using what we felt was infantilizing terminology with adult clients. They are not getting "parented" and they are not "children". What we did was to apply psychodramatic schemas - adult in presentation - addressing the tasks that by interview and review of patient records, were not successfully completed during a pivotal earlier childhood developmental stage. For example, Issues of control and being able to say "no" were addressed in mild conflict and authority tableaus. We were shocked at how effective this proved to be. And how long lasting were the benefits. I recently found letters of commendation in my files while perusing this past endeavor (I am now retired ). Unfortunately I moved on and left the work we were doing. I do not know that my colleague continued the work, or started an experimental protocol. I wonder what your results have been, whether you've considered using so strong a technique as psychodrama, and whether you have made any attempt at documenting the efficacy or effictiveness. Thanks, Lawrence

  • @Serenityonlinetherapy

    @Serenityonlinetherapy

    5 жыл бұрын

    Hi, Lawrence. It sounds like you were doing some great work and research. I am a therapist, not a researcher. I do base my approach on research, however. I am a mindfulness-based cognitive-behavioral therapist, and the work I do with clients is to help them become more aware of how their mind works so that can make better choices for themselves. I use a lot of metaphors to help clients understand complex parts of themselves in more manageable ways. It is not my only approach to helping clients, but it is one that seems to make sense to and benefit many clients. Thanks for your input!

  • @elarakamai

    @elarakamai

    5 жыл бұрын

    @@Serenityonlinetherapy Thx. It looks like you have intuitively come across similar techniques using Erikson and CBT. Very impressive. I trust you have been rewarded by positive outcomes. My concern with my earlier efforts was that we were only seeing results based on selection and confirmation bias. Your above presentation makes me think that the techniques are really on to something fundamental and important.

  • @Serenityonlinetherapy

    @Serenityonlinetherapy

    5 жыл бұрын

    @@elarakamai I also have been heavily influenced by the research of Jon Kabat-Zinn.

  • @elarakamai

    @elarakamai

    5 жыл бұрын

    @@Serenityonlinetherapy I followed Thich Nhat Hanh for mindfulness.

  • @andreamathis3932
    @andreamathis39325 жыл бұрын

    I'm a complete failure of all. Explains a lot. So how do I "grow up" ?

  • @Serenityonlinetherapy

    @Serenityonlinetherapy

    5 жыл бұрын

    Hi, Andrea. You are not a "failure." This is just what happened to you as a child. It is not your fault. However, it is your problem to solve. There is help available. You can get therapy and read books/watch videos about healing and reparenting your Wounded/Inner Child. It may help to go to a 12 Step program like Codependents Anonymous or Al-Anon (if you have been affected by someone's alcoholism). The key point is this: as a child you were powerless to change your circumstances and not mature enough to understand what was happening to you, but as an adult you have the power to heal and grow. Best wishes!

  • @andreamathis3932

    @andreamathis3932

    5 жыл бұрын

    @@Serenityonlinetherapy thank you for the suggestion. I have been thinking about Al-Anon

  • @bonnie_gail

    @bonnie_gail

    5 жыл бұрын

    Andrea Mathis I get more out of Al-Anon than going to church, I feel safe because there is no cross talking allowed or gossiping; in fact, because I felt safe I became aware of my trust issues

  • @sosororo4891
    @sosororo48913 жыл бұрын

    I have all 8 missed and incompleted.. O Gode help me with that

  • @t.h.nguyen5193
    @t.h.nguyen51934 жыл бұрын

    Hi Counselor Carl, what steps do I need you heal stage #1 to #4? Please advise. Thank you.

  • @Serenityonlinetherapy

    @Serenityonlinetherapy

    4 жыл бұрын

    Hi. You can begin by viewing the videos in my Inner Child Work Playlist. Here is the link: kzread.info/head/PL_wjG-62Kkus47LyeKJJjqEx_5KU5uy59. Best wishes!

  • @christinabutterfield1801
    @christinabutterfield18014 жыл бұрын

    Do you know where I can find more info on Intimacy vs. Isolation? It's the stage I'm stuck on :(

  • @Serenityonlinetherapy

    @Serenityonlinetherapy

    4 жыл бұрын

    Try researching "fear of intimacy." Here is my video on the topic: kzread.info/dash/bejne/na2A2tObes3Poto.html

  • @taylorbee4010
    @taylorbee40103 жыл бұрын

    So if it happens to you in childhood why does it affect you more as an adult than during childhood? Is it just because it all built up?

  • @taylorbee4010
    @taylorbee40103 жыл бұрын

    I figured it out I'm mirroring the ways my parents were assholes to me. I got to undo that. Because I swear I wouldn't act like that.

  • @fredmiami
    @fredmiami3 жыл бұрын

    May God help you all who seek help.

  • @taylorbee4010
    @taylorbee40103 жыл бұрын

    My parents were overbearing but they would switch between overbearing and just falling asleep. Or not being there.

  • @carolineconvery7948

    @carolineconvery7948

    2 жыл бұрын

    hope you are ok.

  • @pavlo3511
    @pavlo35114 жыл бұрын

    is dependency genetic?

  • @Serenityonlinetherapy

    @Serenityonlinetherapy

    4 жыл бұрын

    No, it is learned behavior, so it can be unlearned.

  • @RoyBruce007
    @RoyBruce0073 жыл бұрын

    So basically hug your child?

  • @Serenityonlinetherapy

    @Serenityonlinetherapy

    3 жыл бұрын

    Yes, learn to deal with your own imperfect parts with the love of a nurturing parent.

  • @antjestr1047
    @antjestr10475 ай бұрын

    I feel my life is a complete waste.. I couldn't complete the early stages...I'm in my thirtees now, cut contact with my abusive family...yes I'm often depressed and have a fear of intimacy, never had a relationship while others starting their families...I always felt like an outcast due to the consequences of the abuse at home, now it is continuing...

  • @Serenityonlinetherapy

    @Serenityonlinetherapy

    5 ай бұрын

    It sounds like life has let you down, so quite naturally you would be depressed due to the shame, hopelessness, isolation, and lack of purpose. One program that can help with all these things - and it's free - is Adult Children of Alcoholics AND Dysfunctional Families (ACA). It is available online and in many cities. Here is the link: adultchildren.org/meeting-search/. I wish you the best!

  • @antjestr1047

    @antjestr1047

    5 ай бұрын

    @@Serenityonlinetherapy thank you🙏🏻

  • @Serenityonlinetherapy

    @Serenityonlinetherapy

    5 ай бұрын

    @@antjestr1047 You're welcome!

  • @miscuitae
    @miscuitae2 жыл бұрын

    Wow I've not developed any of these. Can faulty parents be sued? They better be. Well, abusive parents take pride in ruining lives.

  • @philipmulvihill1455
    @philipmulvihill14552 жыл бұрын

    do you have a counselor in the Venice Florida area? I can afford 50 dollars a throw!!!! I am 63 years old and have not separated EMOTIONALLY from my mother who abandoned me to a terrible father at age 10!!! a guy named Rick belden does this type work but it's big bucks!!!! thanks take care!!!!

  • @Serenityonlinetherapy

    @Serenityonlinetherapy

    2 жыл бұрын

    I'm sorry, Philip, but I don't know any counselors near Venice, FL, to recommend. I also don't personally know any online therapists to recommend.

  • @philipmulvihill1455

    @philipmulvihill1455

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@Serenityonlinetherapy thank you sir blessings

  • @nancydecosta8577
    @nancydecosta8577 Жыл бұрын

    Grandchildren are in unsafe homes. :(