Gaslighting Abuse - What It Is & How To Handle It | BetterHelp
If you or someone you know is dealing with a challenging situation and could benefit from additional support, consider talking to one of the 10,000 licensed online counselors at BetterHelp.
Gaslighting abuse is a manipulative technique that abusers use to make people feel like their feelings aren’t valid or “real.” Often people who engage in gaslighting victims are narcissistic and want to control the abused. People that gaslight often uses lies to manipulate victims. The tricky thing about gaslighting is that the abuser isn’t always cruel to the abused. They alternate being mean with giving the abuse compliments. Here’s a way that they’re able to control their victim effectively.
Abusers are often highly intelligent and always extremely manipulative. They determine the key people in the person's life and convince the abused individual that their loved ones won’t believe them if they reach out for help. An abuser who gaslights isolates their victim so that the abused feels like they can only trust the abuser.
People that gaslight others convince victims that the important people around them don’t care about them or have turned against them. The abused person believes that their loved ones aren’t on their side and is further dependent on their abuser’s validation. In reality, the abuser is lying about who isn’t on the victim’s side.
Lying is an integral part of gaslighting. An abuser makes up the reality and introduces it to their victim. They tell the abused what to believe and what not to believe. The victim then questions their thoughts and may think that they are crazy. If you think you’re in a relationship where you are a victim of gaslighting, trust your intuition. You’re not crazy, and your feelings are valid.
Mental and emotional abuse is real even if you can’t see the scars. Reach out to a mental health professional whether that’s in your local area or online, you deserve to get the help you need. You don’t have to stay in an abusive relationship. A trained therapist can help you break free from an abuser’s ties.
IMPORTANT: The information in this video is not intended or implied to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. All content, including text, graphics, images, and information contained in this video is for general information purposes only and does not replace a consultation with your doctor.
Пікірлер: 141
Gas lighting abuse is something i wouldn't wish on anyone... I saw it on my sister's marriage. It can make one get mentally ill easily
@levinolan636
4 жыл бұрын
Ya I went through it and it was a woman and it drove me so nuts I colored my hair black because reality was to painful to live in. Drive me fkn nuts.
@CarolynDenison
3 жыл бұрын
Yeah I went through it a good while back. He like to have drove me crazy. Out of the blue on day, I packed enough cloths for work, and my make-up. walked out the door and didn't look back... After that he would sit outside my job and just stare at me. I just ignored him. I knew he was just trying to scare me. He's dead now. See"? Karma's a bitch...
@virgie4715
3 жыл бұрын
@@levinolan636 oh goodness, when a *guy* reaches the hair dying stage... you know it’s bad. Don’t think I’m joking or making light of your situation either, I’m being dead serious. I am so sorry you had to go through that.
I suffered from gaslighting, I felt humiliated and helpless.
@kristinalaboriel3290
4 жыл бұрын
I completely understand because I am going through the same thing.
@psyche6891
4 жыл бұрын
Ana Marshall same here
@levinolan636
4 жыл бұрын
I was too. I had a woman do this to me for 4 years. I finally got free but now I do not really trust women.
@londonbrumidge7213
4 жыл бұрын
Are you trying to get help
@estheradao
4 жыл бұрын
Same, it’s terrible how they make you feel confused
I’ve been in a relationship for 3 years, he’s the gas-lighter. I’m stuck, but I’m trying to get out..slowly but I’m working on it.
They will play with ya head coz u got a good heart let them move onto the next tool box anyone who is been gaslighted deserve so much better they won't even apologize!
Being gaslighted is horrific and can be something so hard to recover from. Validation and need to control one of the prime reason people gaslight. Great content!
Awesome video, as a gaslighting victim i can't describe how bad you feel when someone close does this to you
I have never heard of gaslighting abuse before, thanks for educating me.
@londonbrumidge7213
4 жыл бұрын
We must be open minded
@Roodsteam
4 жыл бұрын
that shouldnt mean to accuse everyone of gaslighting or playing games with you. By watching those videos ive expierenced overthinking many situations when i should just be calm and go with the flow. So dont get toooooo hung up on those topics. Just be aware that they exist.
@somyan8540
4 жыл бұрын
@@londonbrumidge7213 you want to say that the closed minded people are gas lighters and do this to others for example to open minded people ? I think that this is true closed minded people can not be as creative and as opinioneted as when they switch and think from other sides and corners and see there are other ideas and better answers to even your questions altough some paths may be worn and well walked on other roads can be successful or ideal too maybe even preferable to yourself and wiser You maybe had painted one way all your life and now you out of clear bordom you start different tehniques and engles then realise "Why haven't I done this before??" Altough one way is right and correct the other way too can be different and equally successful too If you are artist, cook or sports person, economist or similar Yes you need to be open minded. Somebody discovered this idea in 90's when wrote a song Open Your Mind. As a student I see its meaning and oportunitues. World is your oyster.
@jeremiahlopez481
4 жыл бұрын
Gang stalking or targeted individual
This type of behavior really upsets me and I will not put up with it. Gaslighters are mentally deranged that should be avoided at all costs.
terrible feeling, trust me...
Gaslighting is such a toxic situation! By the time the victim understands what's happening, it may have already ruined relationships with loved ones, and the person may be suffering terribly. It's really important to get help and find a way out of these horrible situations.
This is a really tricky physchological situation that affects our mental health and needs to be handled with special care!
Gaslighting can be crucial for the victim's self-esteem and leave long-term marks. I know people that experienced it and they still cannot overcome it.
@ecatcheshire9741
3 жыл бұрын
And sadly this I what many people do not understand. The repeated trauma causes physical changes in the brain responses and hyper vigilance and can affect the whole personality overtime. The situation is dangerous.
I've been so blind in my abusive relationship, thanks for opening my eyes...very helpful video
@brianwalsh1401
4 жыл бұрын
We don't know until we know. Then were devastated to find out the person who was suppose to care about me does crap like this and really doesn't care at all.
Is it gaslighting if they take whatever emotions you have and invalidate it by saying that they feel that way not you? My mom does this to me all the time.
@Zekrom569
4 жыл бұрын
Well, this is called emotional invalidation, usually it is part of the whole gaslighting think, it is still emotional abuse, but gaslighting is more about second guessing your perception of the real world(good indicators would be "That didnt happen" or "You remember it all wrong"), so it is a systematic way to make you doubt your sense of reality, and emotional invalidation is used as part of the same plan(which is usually comes in the form "You are so sensitive" or "You are overreacting")...A critical component of gaslighting is messing up with your sense of reality
@ginabeau9820
3 жыл бұрын
I’m so sorry you go through that. It isn’t easy when it’s a parent . I’m going through the same thing. It’s hard to hold onto your sanity when it’s your only family member holding it against you
@ruru6717
3 жыл бұрын
its not necesarry gaslighting, but its emotional abuse. Theyre victimizing themselves while you are the victim. This is a thing abusers do all the time. My reminders are: what you felt is valid. If they need to use violence (hitting,yelling,insulting) to make their point make sense, theyre wrong AND abusive. (this is lietrally manipulation, manipulation is always abusive). If they cannot take the blame and try to see that they hurt you, and instead theyre invalidating/insulting/mocking you in any way/using your suffering as insults, theyre abusive.(and this tactic is named emotional/psychological abuse, and it contains gaslighting.)If someone does any of those things to you run from them. If youre stuck, plan to escape as soon as possible and never come back. Its not your bussiness to change an abuser.An abuser never changes, especially if the victim tries to change them. (Since abusers see themselves as superior, they have 0 intrest in actually listening to someone they see inferior, aka victims.)So stop trying, stop defending abusers.
I had gaslighting issues in the past and after I looked for professional help and the therapy, I can say that I feel better and not being abused anymore. Great video!
This is terrible method of abusing, many people are often sensitive and this can cause some major health issues
This is very helpful! At work, I deal with a lot of personalities, including those who are passive aggressive.
If you came across this video ..... please heal ! Go to the gym. Self care is key .
I was not aware that there was anything like Gaslighting Abuse. If not treated in time can lead to great consequences !!!
I really love your videos, as far as i know, Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation that seeks to sow seeds of doubt in a targeted individual or in members of a targeted group, making them question their own memory, perception, and sanity.... Thank you!
Gaslighting is a form of abuse that often goes unrecognized, so it's important to be aware of all its nuances. Thank You for all advices! Great video!
My husband sent this video to me and it makes so much sense about my family
This is the reason why many people get separated and I find your counselors as a savior for such relationships. Thanks!
Excellent video. Spot on. It gave me chills ;everything she said is exactly what ive went thru. Thank you. I didnt even know what gaslighting was until someone mentioned it to me and i have been researching it.
I have never heard of this term until now, thank you so much for this info... it seems to me that more peple need to know about this so they can take control of their life, maybe they don't even know how bad it effects their everyday life
i was in a toxic relationship once and i have experienced this personally. It was pretty horrible
Good information. Today there are people who abuse mentalente of others. Thank God for trained professionals to help people who live this situation!
i appreciate your help,i see all of this relating to me entirely and its been going on for a great many years since i was growing up and i now know for sure and again thank you for your caring and hopefully i can recover from all that happened to me without taking any more of this kind of,i call it mental anquish suffering that i have gone threw over the years with no fault of my own,i'am sorry for laying this on you and all of your help is greatly appreciated thank you,love Denny
This is so helping since things or rather gaslighting occur unnoticeable, so its important to get this first hand information.
In some situations we must talk to others. It's not a crime to ask for help, everything can be changed if we have someone with us. (this is so important).
Hi thanks u very much u have made every things so much clearer for me i did not know i was a victim of gaslighting but now i am happier mentality i hope u keep this social bullying abuse video coming cause i dont stand for people being bullying others i thank u for ur great works
The best weapon against a gas lighter is another person, who stands by your side.. But usually gas lighter target single victims..
That is good to know, you never know when you may need it.
I deal with it everyday Some how I just holding on
BetterHelp, Thank You for all good advices!
Very interesting. This happens a lot, and it is really not that difficult to identify in the start, and when a manipulative person sees that you know what they are up to and that they can not manipulate you, their respect immediately grows to a huge amount, or they just ignore you. When their respect grows, you can sometimes turn the situation around. Video is greatly presented as always, all important points are covered and the focus is helping people rather than just explaining what gaslighting is
My little sister just brought this gaslighting word up to me and I almost feel like I have Stockholm syndrome form this for so long I know I am abused mentally and physically but why can't I leave what is wrong with me???
Big fan of your videos, your topics are very interesting, Gaslighting Techniques and Examples. ... Gaslighting abuse can be perpetrated by either women or men. "Withholding" is one gaslighting technique where the abuser feigns a lack of understanding, refuses to listen and declines sharing his emotions.
BetterHelp thank you so much for this detailed and well explained video! we really aprecciate this
This was an excellent video that helped me out at this moment in time! Midnight the 25th of June already!
I have a friend who is suffering from gaslighting i should share this video to him.
Narcissist are very good at gaslighting especially when they don't get there own way. they also try and twist what you have said, and say things like remember when you told me this about that person, and how rude he/she was. When you know for certain you had not, but in fact it was them that had mentioned it, and when you call them out. They quickly change the topic of conversation. They love to manipulate and stir up trouble between people, telling lies to each person, that so and so said this about you, but please what ever you do don't tell them, I told you, and, then to that other person, so and so said this about you, but I beg up Please!!! don't say anything, promise me. So they can cover there own back. Just evil manipulative People stay well away from them.
Love your videos and how well you explain things, keep up!
Very spot on and clear, thank you!
We must never let someone pull us down
very good info provided in this video. Thanks for mentioning the steps to handle gaslighting. Thanks for the share.
omg this is so cool. Really amazing. Thank you so much for sharing this video
I got gaslighted for years
Gaslighting is bad for your soul...
I like this video, it's very interesting because I didn't know this concept: "gaslight" and it's very useful information given here. It defines what gaslight is and talks about features of tactic strategies used by people who gaslight, and how people who is gaslight victim could defense themselves from this kind of abuse, psiclogical abuse, being concious about he or she is a gaslight victim. Thanks.
Great video, thank you so very much for sharing!
waw, now I understand my mom. She always does these things
well put. You hit the nail on he head.
Thank you for this video. I thought I was going crazy...
nice explanation... thank you for sharing....
Love your videos.The worst thing you could do is keeping all that bad things inside you, I agree
Thanks a lot for the valuable information presented in this video. In fact, i did not know that this kind of torture has a name which is Gaslighting. Thumb up from me.
Now i know that i am victim of gaslighting for almost 9years up to present. Thanks for giving me and idea..
i'd actually never figured out exactly what this word means, so thanks for teaching me about it.
Gaslighting- it was a new term for me. Different aspects regarding it was well explained . It is really cruel on doing such thing...
Thank you. God bless you for this video. Life saving.
Wonderful info, your channel is best mental health channel on YT!
Thanks for like this explanation. Your video so helpful.
Thanks for this.
Thankyou this helped so much
I already know how to avoid and deal with gaslighting, I want to make sure I don't actually do it.
This is the first time I am hearing the term Gaslighting Abuse.
I never knew of such. People are really evil
Gas lighting abuse is something i wouldn't wish on anyone.I know a couple of people who have suffered a lot for this kind of situation, and I t is very sad.no one is worth humiliating you or making you feel bad!
excellent video, it is really very successful in the things that say and explain
Thank you.
Thanks!
Thank you
Sick thanks for the strategies
thank you
Iv experienced this first hand. They take things, and weeks later replace it. Then tell you ur forgetful. Vandalise ur personal belongings and then say it wasn't me. Then they say ur nuts and it doesn't stop. Recently all my stamps were taken they will turn up when I need them most
Thanks
There is sometimes no way to handle it. Itss like being in a concentration camp.
This technique of psychological manipulation is practiced by the abuser on the victim over a prolonged period of time, having the effect of losing the victim's confidence in his / her own ability to distinguish what is real of illusion. In this way, the abuser ("gaslighter" in terms of specialty) acquires total power and control over the victim, because he only puts his trust in his perception.
i think, i swear, is the worst. And the worst thing you could do, is keeping all that bad things inside you
This is the first time i heard about this term and knowing that this is one of the most difficult types of emotional abuse, i think i need to observe the people around me. Just being curious.
Gaslighting abuse happens in the name of "Dowry", in India, but it is almost controlled now. Most of the people encourage "Dowry" in the name of culture. but law is strong to punish such brutality. This video reminded me of this. Nice excellent awareness video for the society.
The section on Projection and substance abuse - it was repeated here. Good video otherwise.
There's a lot of people that abuse this word and associate gaslighting with simply disagreeing with them!
The part on projections happens 2 times in a row.
You know what it. Here. If feels bad. It is bad. Walk away. If it work - get a lawyer
This actually is shown in the movie Tangled.
I get it everyday. And f them all.
Would one of the signs be making you do things for them that make you uncomfortable?
@master_productions
3 жыл бұрын
I know I’m late but could you elaborate on this? I think I’m going through something very similar.
The one that gaslights me is very unintelligent and so I can see exactly what she is doing most of the time, I say you are gaslighting me and she says no you are gaslighting me.
Is there another word for gaslighting, or a word for someone who gaslights?
She lost me at boiling a small creature. My heart can't take that. Jeeze.
I love you. You come like an angel in my life.
This is awesome thanks for the info I’m going to try this on my girlfriend
Good job!!! Thank you!🙏
I'm Glade I'm a good person
Now I can understand why I smell many time something rotten since four years ago in my bedroom
My life
Watch the movie.
feeling bless to have watch this video coz its very informative and helpful tips tnx for sharing indeed!!!!