Cold Feet vs. Caution: You distinguish between having cold feet, which you interpret as not wanting to get married, and wanting to ensure that everything is in order before the wedding. It's important for you to feel confident and prepared.
The Enemy's Opposition to Marriage: You mention a belief that there may be external forces or negative influences working against marriages. The idea is that unity in marriage is a threat to these forces, and therefore, they try to make it difficult.
Lack of Role Models: You acknowledge that you don't have a good representation of a successful marriage in your life and that you're navigating marriage based on instincts and fear. Despite not having a mentor, you express a desire to learn and understand more about marriage.
Religious Perspectives: While you weren't initially a religious person, you've gained a better understanding of what religion means to you. There's a discussion about asking God for guidance in relationships and marriage.
Challenges of Marriage: You recognize that challenges are inevitable in any aspect of life, including marriage. However, you emphasize the importance of approaching challenges positively and not letting the notion of "challenges" carry a negative connotation.
Unique Connection in Marriage: You highlight the uniqueness and rarity of the connection you share with your partner in marriage, emphasizing the value of having a lifelong companion and support system.
Potential Pitfalls of Seeking Outside the Marriage: You mention that seeking fulfillment outside of marriage may provide only a partial solution to what's lacking and may lead to further complications.