No video
Elon Musk: Living God
Greetings proletariat! This is the very real, very true story of Elon Musk: Living God.
Patreon: / georgrockallschmidt
Twitter: / grockallschmidt
Facebook: / 100025678273449
Greetings proletariat! This is the very real, very true story of Elon Musk: Living God.
Patreon: / georgrockallschmidt
Twitter: / grockallschmidt
Facebook: / 100025678273449
Пікірлер: 808
Surprised Georg didn't mention the man's lush, glorious hair that he's always had since he was just a wee genius.
@repletereplete8002
Жыл бұрын
As his unrivalled IQ rocketed so did his follicles shoot up to match his glorious ascent into the heavens!
@chrissre7935
Жыл бұрын
The booketh of elon god 'mongst men states: booketh of paypal, chapt'r 2 v'rs 5:. And than programm'rs and engine'rs did look at the code and t wast lacking valor. Elon stoodeth above those folk and those gents fearfully did state. This is a mess nay sir can fixeth the code. Elon did start coding but the temp'rature of his headeth wast soo high. That gent did shed his hair to maketh the temp'rature dropeth. Aft'r the coding wast done. That gent stoodeth and hath said yond code is the bombeth. than that gent regrew his hair in following months. His hath lost hair than did cure canc'r f'r people all ov'r the w'rld. Yond is the w'rd of elon
@jaydy71
Жыл бұрын
He said "let there be hair" and simply willed it into existence. As you remember, hair didn't exist before him.
@nineteenfortyeight6762
Жыл бұрын
And that big manly jaw that doesn't move
Elon is so incredible....we really should send him to explore space.
@54tisfaction
Жыл бұрын
Brilliant!
@lifeisstr4nge
Жыл бұрын
Alone
@parsoniareigns
Жыл бұрын
Surely, in chariot befitting him. A car perhaps, electric even?
@Ira__L
Жыл бұрын
along with putin please! and the Iranian dictator. and Trump too (as a preventative measure)
@ocdmusic
Жыл бұрын
@Atropus Arbaalish or food.
If only the BBC did impartiality like this, masterful stuff.
You forgot the part where he would sleep on factory floors in order to contribute his body heat. This ensured that the workers had a comfortable work environment while also save the planet
i still remember when Elon singlehandedly drank all the water out of the cave in Thailand so those boys and their trainer could walk out and not even get their feet wet. what a hero.
@rtqii
Жыл бұрын
You are forgetting that he walked across the water first... And then he realized the others could not walk across the water, so he drank the water, allowing them to escape. Very much like Superman.
@christopherrohlf1975
Жыл бұрын
And when that guy jealously called him a pedo afterwards, he didn't even respond... What humility!
@notyourdamnbusiness8795
Жыл бұрын
@@christopherrohlf1975 its like the dude wasnt even thankful for the creation of the PR submarine industry. some people i tell ya.
As a South African this is absolutely hilarious
@SchlangeVonEden
Жыл бұрын
As a German, this is too. ;)
@paulhadden
Жыл бұрын
As an Australian, this is why South Africa is just too scary. If there’s any other Commonwealth nation that can keep ‘Straya in check and deliver a serving of humble pie after it’s dominated the Comm Games medal tally like China does in the Olympics. Then send in that teched up mercenary from Elysium
@AntiCookieMonster
Жыл бұрын
As non-native English speaker, this sentence structure makes no sense.
@elvingearmasterirma7241
Жыл бұрын
@@AntiCookieMonster The subject is implied with the use of "As a" South African is the descriptive noun And then, this is the second subject. The video. Absolutely hilarious is the description and what I, the first subject, think of the second subject Edit: I am breaking it down because it is informal English and you will lose marks if you use it in a classroom
@AntiCookieMonster
Жыл бұрын
@@elvingearmasterirma7241 (Now I feel bad for making you brake snow clone chain under your original comment.) It feels like a template for a sentence got highjacked to form similar sentence, but one where middle part fell out. As line of reasoning, it's not as nice to follow along. As not that smart of a person, [I think] this can be easily understood from context. As human, this machine of flesh and bone is fallible.
By only 3 seconds in, this has the greatest intro of all time: "Greetings, Proletariat! George Washington." Everything you do is gold. Please never ever change your style.
It's this kind of exhaustively-researched, hard-hitting, tell-it-how-is journalism that keeps me coming back to your channel, Georg.
"Named after Tesla coils in command and conquer red alet", threw my head back with laughter! This is just great. 👍
He also invented internet communications by the transitive property of accidentally buying twitter.
@sprobablycancr4457
Жыл бұрын
Some people wouldn't know genius if it burned their house down with a faulty circuit.
It's one hell of an achievement to become the punchline of the world in 2022, a year in which competition for the title of "World's Biggest Dickhead" has been so strong.
"No world shall be beyond my rule; no enemy shall be beyond my wrath." -Elon Musk
@davidlean1060
Жыл бұрын
This quote has inspired me to invent a new word game. You come up with a quote as you have done and the game is to decide whether it was said by a Star Trek villain or Musk! Fun for all the family this christmas!
@samk522
Жыл бұрын
@@davidlean1060 I would love to take credit, but this quote is actually the Emperor of Mankind from Warhammer 40k. Glad I was able to inspire a new game, though!
this brings a tear to my eye. everytime i feel down at my dead-end minimum wage job, i donate what little savings i have (often incurring more debt) to God Emperor Musk, because i know it is put to better use in his loving hands.
Wow. I didn't even know he invented Tesla and PayPal. No one ever mentions them. What a great guy.
He also revolutionised the perfume industry by secreting an aromatic substance from glands in his abdomen.
As a South African, I am saddened that they never taught us this in school.
@Yellow-Rose
Жыл бұрын
😂🤣
This sounds like the Wikipedia article of a video game antagonist who was immensely popular in the first two games, but has been part of the in-game mythology of dozens upon dozens of sequels and prequels and ill-advised plotlines involving cloning and time travel, to the point that they're directly responsible for everything that has happened in the in-franchise universe.
@Bleilock1
Жыл бұрын
And it turns out he aint smart the way public thinks of him
@nicanornunez9787
Жыл бұрын
Yeah truly the Andrew Ryan of our universe, but even Smarter and cool. And Loved unconditionally by his father.
@notbaldfrost
Жыл бұрын
Every villain is really just part-him.
@frenchguitarguy1091
Жыл бұрын
Are you talking about doctor who??
I'm glad that someone FINALLY made an Elon Musk biography with FACTS
@crmesson22k
Жыл бұрын
Lmao
@jtgd
Жыл бұрын
N Logic
@thesmiffable
Жыл бұрын
@@jtgd beat me to it
@patanouketgersiflet9486
Жыл бұрын
@@thesmiffable The most faithful, factual biography of Elon Musk you'll ever find is that by Elon Musk. He'll pay you $50 if you read it ; he'll also solve world hunger and rid Russia of those pesky Ukrainians.
I like how you saved the biggest, most definite truth until the end. His dad loves him so very much.
I used to believe that Elon was a dbag. I had no idea he was so principled, brave, and altruistic. I now have a new found respect for this man.
@BB-te8tc
Жыл бұрын
I loved the part where he single-handedly took out a Hind-D armed only with a rocket launcher. What an incredible man.
@playboysadness6494
Жыл бұрын
Don’t forget gorgeous! And slightly spicy
@listigerlurch4340
Жыл бұрын
That must be the extreme altruism I am hearing alot about lately!
@BB-te8tc
Жыл бұрын
I'll bet that Simpsons episode with him has aged remarkably well now.
@kelleybenne77
Жыл бұрын
Although he didn't invent the electric car, he was allowed to sell them.
I would not be surprised if that how Elon sees himself.
people always give Mandella crap for his time on reality TV but he did a great job telling the world about the troubles in Africa, and honestly he was good in breaking bad!
@TheBanMan
Жыл бұрын
Shame about his cartel connections from his youth in Chile
Thank you. You've put all my concerns about Musk to rest. Wonderful work as usual, Georg.
@blah2blah65
Жыл бұрын
Same here! And no doubt this video has served to soothe the wounded, flimsy egos of the Twitter employees recently fired, pushed over the edge, or fearing for their jobs. It's nice that we can all universally love Elon once again, as has been foretold.
@CaminoAir
Жыл бұрын
@@blah2blah65 Amen.
As someone who lived in South Africa from the late 80s through the end of Apartheid, and then moved back to the US, I can confirm that all of this is true.
He's gonna buy KZread just to get this taken down.
@LaurieKoudstaal
Жыл бұрын
Because he's so modest?
I wonder if my grandparents and (redacted) friends would think this is real
@wingflanagan
Жыл бұрын
I’m just waiting. You _know_ the Sarcasm Impaired are on their way….
Wow. I never knew the history of the man. He truly is the greatest American that ever lived.
@j.2512
Жыл бұрын
the greatest african american for sure
@DlcEnergy
Жыл бұрын
White Privilege + Black Privilege isn't a privilege, it's a gift, and you use it for the good of mankind.
@vitorafmonteiro
Жыл бұрын
He's so great he can be the greastest American while being South African.
The fact that I have heard musk fanboys saying thing very similar to this, is so worrying
Have been following you for a few years now, (Human Centipede videos) & I’ve got to admit, you’re one of my favourite guys on KZread… Such wittiness, we don’t find elsewhere & the topics are always very interesting! Thank you Georg!
a beautiful story about a truly great man. A shame the video was too short, and had no place for the times when bald eagles would entrust their young in Elons care, and how he would personally travel the world helping to end deforestation by putting down saplings in each footstep he left in the arid lands, and flowers would bloom, even if it was not yet the season for them.
@brianyule1289
Жыл бұрын
I believe that's coming in the special edition director's cut.
@piotrmroczkowski2324
Жыл бұрын
He single handedly reintroduced the Californian Condor, acting as both parents for the hatchlings, regurgitating rotting meat into their sweet little beaks. Then he stopped the homelessness crisis in California, by just buying everyone living on the street a home. He is like Mother Theresa, if Mother Theresa had any compassion, and cared about others.
@unstoppableExodia
Жыл бұрын
@@piotrmroczkowski2324 ah mother Theresa, the most messed up Albanian since Enver Hoxha
Glad to see that there is finally an unbiased, truthful account of the life of the greatest man who ever lived™
Thank you. I come here to be educated. Just like Elon was educated, we're so alike. I can't wait for your next film. I'll be trembling for it.
@GorilieVR
Жыл бұрын
i shudder with anticipation 🥵
I had gleeful forgotten about the existence of Janet Street-Porter. Great factual video!
@eddiewillers1
Жыл бұрын
Surprised that champagne Socialist is still alive!
You forgot the parts where he banished the Void Dragon to Mars, added a third strand to our DNA and is presently building the first McDonald's franchise location on the moon. 😏
@Pancunian
Жыл бұрын
That just sound far-fetched!
If you watch this over and over again - it becomes a reality. That’s wen plastic turns in to gold.
@xBINARYGODx
Жыл бұрын
lol
@sprobablycancr4457
Жыл бұрын
@@xBINARYGODx 110010101101010100110100010110010101001010
I was holding out so well until "...his running mate, intellectual powerhouse and renowned journalist, Joe Rogan..." where I almost collapsed from laughter. That was overkill.
He's also presently liberating Mars from the Lizard People. He traveled there once personally in one of his Tesla vehicles.
Let's be honest, if Elon Musk was a bond villain, bond wouldn't need to do anything because he'd self sabotage.
Nelson Mandela's Apostle 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
As a South American this had me rolling over the floor with laughter. I absolutely lost it when you made the joke about the thing. It's funny because it's true! Well done, Sir
Finally! I tried reading the official, full-length Biography, but it was just so heavy. Thanks for condensing it into something a loser like me can start to wrap my "mind" around.
Georg being the least sarcastic Englishman
Elon - inventor of lithium, the Higgs Boson, and yellow skittles.....what a genius!
@ssj3gohan456
Жыл бұрын
somebody watches Patrick Boyle
I can't tell if the voice crack in the beginning is intentional or not. Funny either way
100% accurate. My dad works at Twitter.
@hazardeur
Жыл бұрын
can he try to throw something heavy and/or disgusting at that douchebag? it would make my day. no, actually my whole week.
Jesus, I got catfished for a second, there, Georg. I seriously thought he was a scumbag, but you have made me see the light and the truth. Thank you, my brother.
This is the biographical masterpiece I didn't know I needed!!! I thank thee!
@dinogt8477
Жыл бұрын
no one cares
@ocdmusic
Жыл бұрын
@@dinogt8477 everyone cares!
@atlanta2076
Жыл бұрын
@@dinogt8477 I am nobody. And it's true what you're saying. I care a LOT! :D
@ogungou9
Жыл бұрын
@@dinogt8477: You're right, I'm no one and I care!
This is A+ satire You should be proud of yourself.
Elon proves that all the money in the world can't buy an ounce of social skills
Completely unbiased, and thoroughly researched, I liked how you provided a grounded human perspective of our god-king.
Yet another retelling of Elon's story that serves well to remind us of why he is our daddy. Can't wait for the hyperloop to Mars!
“…Elon founded Tesla, named after Tesla Coils in Command & Conquer Red Alert.” This line broke me. I grew up playing Red Alert 2, and that game was how I learned of Tesla in the first place. It’s come full circle now.
On a break from work at UPS and finally get to watch one of your videos right after it comes out! Cheers all!
@sprobablycancr4457
Жыл бұрын
You work at an uninterruptable power supply?
@chenzenzo
Жыл бұрын
@@sprobablycancr4457 I am an uninterruptable power supply.
Elon saved me from myself, he's just that good.
I am glad that the whole, unadorned truth about this great man has finally been told. Did you know that Elon has as many, or more, doctoral titles as some other people? Incredible!
Perhaps the finest biography ever committed to tape. Superlative.
@sprobablycancr4457
Жыл бұрын
I've been taking those recently, been really backed up.
Tears in my eyes..... ALL hail space Jesus!
Oscar for best short documentary is on the way.
This is the highest effort shitpost I've seen recently. Or ever, really. Bravo!
Man, you broke my snark-o-meter! It collapsed into a singularity!
I’ve heard of Elon but never knew of his great accomplishments Thanks
I can confirm that every word of this is true, scout’s honor.
You broke my brain George.
Ya know, I was super confused about the Rick Grimes thumbnail for a second and then I realized in realtime..."Oh...Yeah...Grimes..."
This is the type of storytelling I can only imagine they probably do in places like North Korea when talking about Kim Jong-un.
"Tesla, named after the Tesla Coils from C&C: Red Alert" Thank you Georg, for never shying away from telling the truth!
This is a pretty good intro to the Book of Elon but you did forget to mention his superspeed, his ability to see perfectly in the dark, and the webs that shoot out of his ass that enable him to swing from tall buildings and bridges. I mean, I know, it's so obvious that you didn't think it was even worth mentioning.
Best documentary I have ever seen I should spread the word of our one true Savior
Never heard of this Elon guy before, but now I feel like I'm fully caught up. Thanks for the video!
That smile at the end. How can one not love Georg?
Dr of Philosophy in Memetic Psychology: Now I understand his brilliant thought leadership via the social media platform. I was blind, but now I see.
Your Red Alert reference was superb. Coincidentally, that game was my first introduction to the Tesla Coil 😂 ahh to be 10 again on summer break… cheers to that!
The true story of a true heroic man.
@sprobablycancr4457
Жыл бұрын
Totally. Balls of ham.
This is the world we live in and I love it.
When QElon was born, there was a supernova that appeared on Earth for the first time. When QElon was 3, he was playing in mud and invented bricks. This started QElon's path to construct a modern society, using his patented brick technology. Rocket technology was used to produce the material for the bricks, demonstration bricks were actually sold for $200 each... Eventually the bricks will be produced for 10 cents each. This is how QElon showed humanity how to make BIG money.
Gadzooks George! You’ve hit the nail on the head!
You just know someone will now be working on translating Plato into cobol don't you?
Watching Musk run Twitter has been like watching Dale Earnhardt run the last lap of the Daytona 500.
This is gold , every minute greater than the last
Georg, this is brilliant. I love you, Dad.
@homosexualpanic
Жыл бұрын
Wait, is your dad Elon or Georg?
@swgdsm
Жыл бұрын
@@homosexualpanic choose your own adventure my friend
Good to see a piece finally come out that is totally unbiased and truthful about the true übermensch that is Elon Musk.
It's amazing that Elon probably has this running through his head constantly. He's like Carmen in that South Park episode where his memory keeps changing to make him look better and better.
my girlfriend yelled "the fuck are you listening to?" like 5 minutes in. Im too high lol.
Never counted so many lies in under ten minutes. A smash! Thank you!
I remember his COBOL version of PLATO on our PDP-11, but it wouldn't compile, and preferred to RUD in the core memory.
At least musk has proved we certainly don't live in a meritocracy
I was smiling, but with "Tesla coils from Comman and Conquer" you got me spit my coffee
That was a real Aphex Twin grin at the end, Bravo!
This is why I don't watch TV anymore. You don't get this caliber of unbiased documentary-making on TV.
One of your best videos to date.
Can you believe, somebody so accomplished and genius as Elon has also a great sense of humor - especially about himself?
Spot on. Thank you, thank you, thank you. I love you, Georg. x
A truly moving summary of the greatest human being to ever live😂
"...if Schindler had been brave. NEVERTHELESS..." 😂😂😂
You missed out that time he pissed an unbroken stream for over 2 minutes at Lionel Richie's house live on Twitch then dedicated it to the memory of his brother Kimbal who is still alive but is being hunted by the FBI after escaping custody when the bus transporting him to prison was hit by a train. #3LitrePeter
At first having been interrupted by an update while stuck in a boisterous brothers binge seemed tedious, but for our great Idol Elon of course one must make sacrifices
South African here. I died when you said "that was a young Nelson Mandela" 🤣
Just as I teach my students ! The tallest mountain in the world is not the Everest, but the sarcasm level of George
When I see Elon's image, looking at me with unconditional love and compassion, I can't overcome the impulse to avert my glance, in shame and unworthiness.
Pretty well researched vid. Kudos. You did omit the the fact that Godzilla is actually Elon's detachable, dirigible dinglewang in a unconvincing rubber costume. If you look at any news footage of Godzilla you can clearly see this, also apparent is the ribbing Elon worked into the outfit... For Toyko's pleasure. Please update your video to include this fact and notify me via lunar semaphore when actioned. Failure to do so in the mandated 30 day grace period will result in this upload being flagged as unsuitable for humid consumption.