Giving the same energy that you're getting is key and if you don't like that energy then move on. It can be hard but that's when you need to choose yourself over the fantasy.

@freshstrt3140

2 жыл бұрын

Yes.

@janine1111

2 жыл бұрын

God i just realized my phantasies and it’s tough

@MissButt3rFly1

2 жыл бұрын

Wow… So true… wake up call

@freedomtruth7418

2 жыл бұрын

well i will say this here, if you are friends with the person first you wont have to go by rules of what not to say, your partner is not only your person you want to date they are suppose to be your best friend and you both tell each other everything so you both can work on each others flaws together, then you can build with that person love isn't rules what is meant to be will be just be yourself act normal and be the persons friend first then go from there then in the end you will get what you want in the end because with that person to built a bound as a union then the man will marry you just relax and be spontaneous be free be honest be loyal and follow your heart and you will be okay, not expecting the man to do everything be bold take care and work with him he is human and so are you live life enjoy life together and free yourself from love rules and then you will get what you really want from that man because in the end true love wins over any rule in the book of love rules of someone else's opinions not all men are the same nor the women so I'm just saying here this go with the flow and flow your heart your love way will come naturally if you just chill out and relax be loyal honest and most importantly become your lovers best friend than all things of true love will come together naturally. good luck everyone bye bye

@sandralosasso5657

2 жыл бұрын

Best advice ever

I set standards with a guy I wanted to date and he ditched me for someone else. It hurt at first, but then I realized I’m much better off.

@caramelqueen6943

8 ай бұрын

Awe, its great you know and understand your worth hun. Maybe best, his loss.

@alysamarie2508

2 ай бұрын

What standards?

@irenemorley75

19 күн бұрын

@@alysamarie2508 Her standards 🙄

We’ve been married for 29 years and I’m still so crazy about my husband. Our two boys are 25 and 22 this year. Empty nesters has been AMAZING. We went on a date once a week for our entire marriage. We never stopped holding hands. This is what I saw my parents do. I cannot tell you how grateful I am for all your advice Matthew because I care so deeply about my marriage and relationship that your advice helps me focus on being the best partner I can be. Please please please always keep doing this. It is what the world needs …!!! Big love ❤️ from Dallas Texas !!!

@gabriellawhitton3907

2 жыл бұрын

@Thomas akhagbosu if you have to bring him back in the first place, he should stay gone

@chrissyc3727

2 жыл бұрын

Congrats!!! Relationship is just like investing in a company, the moment it stopped growing, it's dying. You should share your relationship tips!

@zolushka4823

2 жыл бұрын

you are very lucky! My husband became so cheap, he'd say "can't we just eat at home"? He is an executive who makes very good money but sadly the money changed the man for the worse.

@-SimonRiley

2 жыл бұрын

The fact that you have him included in your profile picture proves your point further

@-SimonRiley

2 жыл бұрын

@@gabriellawhitton3907 That's narcissistic. What if you fucked something up and he obviously didn't like it, or tryna test you if you would still want him or not. Could also be some kind of misunderstanding who knows

Summary: 1) Real date policy. 2) Buy the popcorn= Be a team player . Don't forget gestures. 3) Get excited about little things. 4) Be a grown-up and pick up the phone. Extra tips : @15:35 1- Be wary of projecting your hopes and dreams into the person. 2- Do not give all of yourself immediately 3- Don't give more than they are 4- Don't make them a priority before they've done the same for you. 5- Do not reach out any time you're craving attention! 💜🙏Pray for me and my family

@freedomtruth7418

2 жыл бұрын

well i will say this here, if you are friends with the person first you wont have to go by rules of what not to say, your partner is not only your person you want to date they are suppose to be your best friend and you both tell each other everything so you both can work on each others flaws together, then you can build with that person love isn't rules what is meant to be will be just be yourself act normal and be the persons friend first then go from there then in the end you will get what you want in the end because with that person to built a bound as a union then the man will marry you just relax and be spontaneous be free be honest be loyal and follow your heart and you will be okay, not expecting the man to do everything be bold take care and work with him he is human and so are you live life enjoy life together and free yourself from love rules and then you will get what you really want from that man because in the end true love wins over any rule in the book of love rules of someone else's opinions not all men are the same nor the women so I'm just saying here this go with the flow and flow your heart your love way will come naturally if you just chill out and relax be loyal honest and most importantly become your lovers best friend than all things of true love will come together naturally. good luck everyone bye bye

@nokulungambonambi1442

2 жыл бұрын

@@freedomtruth7418 o

@laurataylor3159

2 жыл бұрын

Now this is real wisdom!!

@rashidashine

2 жыл бұрын

❤️❤️❤️❤️

@faneshianesbitt

2 жыл бұрын

Thanks

Really, just be the best version of yourself.

@JohnsonKayla12

2 жыл бұрын

Yep cause if you’re doing anything else, it won’t work out long term anyway!

@MigueTran

2 жыл бұрын

@@JohnsonKayla12 Exactly. All the things that you pretend to be not, will eventually come out and you have just wasted everyone's time.

@It_was_all_a_dream

2 жыл бұрын

Hmm, Matt spoke about this in the video @17.44 and said that you shouldn’t give the best of yourself, that is unearned, but give the appropriate amount for the stage you’re in.

@MigueTran

2 жыл бұрын

@Jean juju You should be the best version of yourself, for yourself.

@urbctwentyeight

2 жыл бұрын

Exactly people can tell when you are not being authentic unless they hide who they truly are too

Takeaways I got from this: I’m burning up energy and putting others on a pedestal. I’m also not communicating my standards properly. Thank you for educating us!

@dian277

2 жыл бұрын

rejecting someone while being respectful and announcing our standards at the same time, all in 2 short sentences, is a real skill. too much to learn and practice

1) Real date policy. 2) Buy the popcorn . Be a teamplayer . Don't forget gestures. 3)Get excited about little things. 4) Be a grown up and pickup the phone.

2 жыл бұрын

This isnt the 60’s anymore, people dont make calls lol

@CrystalDatingCoach

2 жыл бұрын

@ Yes they do. Men actually CALL ladies they like.

@arianamooon

2 жыл бұрын

I had a guy i loved the way he made me feel but he never stepped into PICKING UP THE PHONE or actually spending time. I knew i wasnt giving him lovely energy like he was giving me, but i couldnt, feeling so let down and alone. Now i know it is my standard and necessity. If a guy wants to text a lot, he’s probably below my confidence level or effort level. Because he seemed cocky and or confident… but that he wouldnt step up and flaked out and wasnt consistent… made it obvious what he was up to.. which didnt match his words/ declarations of devotion. Now i have to still watch the video to understand number 1… maybe thats my date policy… step into reality!!! Like as if i want to be in my phone and in my head by myself… No!!!

@adrianna3515

2 жыл бұрын

@ it’s 2am and this is so funny for no reason

@georgialee6755

2 жыл бұрын

Crystal Correct!

Never thought I’d be watching a video like this in my 50s but here I am. It’s been 4 years since my husband passed & I might attempt to meet someone but after being married so long I have no idea how to play the game anymore, nor if I’m even interested. But I’m grateful for this channel & the honesty portrayed thru it. I know how to be married, I have no idea how to date.

@ninoslanguagejourney6002

Жыл бұрын

So proud of you wanting to dip your feets back into the dating pool! I'm sure it must be jard after you already habe found a partner you shared a life with. But it gave you valuable skills about how to have a relationship. Sure "the game" in the initial stage of dating is working a bit differently and can be a bit frustrating at times, but I'm sure since you made it work woth someone before, you'll be able to find someone to open up to again and that person will see those values in you 🥰

@maureenrobertson6059

Жыл бұрын

Hey. You got this You are mature and giving but not naive to be used. Behind you 100% much luv

@pennemenne1376

Жыл бұрын

You’re not alone. Same here

@PIXIEAUGIE

Жыл бұрын

My soulmate of 37 yrs died 5 yrs ago. I share the same mixed feelings too!

@cristie7154

Жыл бұрын

It’s so nice to hear ! Good luck :) my dad is also in his 50’s and after his divorce i was hoping he will find somebody, but he was repeating for 2 years that he is too old now, and he had his time. Recently he felt in love and met a lady also in her 50’s and he looks so happy!♥️ so there is always time to find soul mate! Good luck

This "educate him" thing....take my advice: it's going to be a lot easier and you are going to save time, money and frustration, if they are already educated when you meet them. I'm serious about it. e.g. If you want to have a good experience you go to a good restaurant, instead of going to a shitty place and try to convince the owner to improve the place...simple and effective

@jmorel42

2 жыл бұрын

But what if all the good restaurants keep taking in newer younger customers

@freedomtruth7418

2 жыл бұрын

well i will say this here, if you are friends with the person first you wont have to go by rules of what not to say, your partner is not only your person you want to date they are suppose to be your best friend and you both tell each other everything so you both can work on each others flaws together, then you can build with that person love isn't rules what is meant to be will be just be yourself act normal and be the persons friend first then go from there then in the end you will get what you want in the end because with that person to built a bound as a union then the man will marry you just relax and be spontaneous be free be honest be loyal and follow your heart and you will be okay, not expecting the man to do everything be bold take care and work with him he is human and so are you live life enjoy life together and free yourself from love rules and then you will get what you really want from that man because in the end true love wins over any rule in the book of love rules of someone else's opinions not all men are the same nor the women so I'm just saying here this go with the flow and flow your heart your love way will come naturally if you just chill out and relax be loyal honest and most importantly become your lovers best friend than all things of true love will come together naturally. good luck everyone bye bye

@OrchidRose83

2 жыл бұрын

Agreed, nowadays most of them don't listen to your standards anyway.

@sandramolano2193

2 жыл бұрын

@@jmorel42 We keep trying new restaurants 😁 I'm Joking...

@sandramolano2193

2 жыл бұрын

@@freedomtruth7418 follow your heart and your brain...not everything is following your instincts and emotions. Sharing your life (Everything: house, Finance, children, bed, time, holidays, etc) is a serious thing, so..know yourself, improve yourself and don't settle for less

So I have consistently done these doing all this here are a few Things I have learnt: 1. Never try and match energy. I'm me always authentic. Even if it's casual. Just sit and observe if their actions align with what I want and match my values at that point in your life. Nobody is worthy of you changing who you are. 2. I know my worth. I know I'm fun, vulnerable and a wonderful communicater. 3. I had this epihany today - Not everyone is at the same growth level as you. Some people (unfortunately) are stuck on unhealthy patterns and crave toxicity. This may be a reason why they do not appreciate your authenticity. Understand that your level of evolution is much higher and you may be too evolved for them. Appreciate and comprehend how far you have come in your journey and move forward. The more you date the more you have a chance of funding who finds someone who aligns with your values. 4. Don't make bad communicaters make you give up on dating. Notice your communication patterns and what is working for you. Be active to communicate and if they don't then please..move on. 4. appreciate you communication skills andb your willingness to grow everyday. Don't doubt your authentic self. Ok Thanks for coming to my Ted talk ❤️

@ImranKhan-tj3dr

Жыл бұрын

Hi ❤❤🌷

@cyyrious

Жыл бұрын

Spot on especially #4 I am a true believer in communication. Most recent guy was horrible I mentioned it he said he would do better did the same thing. I started get bummed on dating but I said nope it’s not me.

@JoannCarolus

Жыл бұрын

That was a great TED talk. Thank-you 🌹

@cc1k435

Жыл бұрын

Loved this. ❤ It may not matter quite so much that they aren't as evolved as you, so long as they actually have an actual, ongoing interest in personal development. That's a BIG difference, IMO.😊

@jamielawrence4749

11 ай бұрын

Haha you should have a dating site!! Seriously. What saddens me is feeling like I found someone with the same communication values and style and then after 2 months it's lime they halted it and turned on a dime and it felt like pulling teeth... nevermind that I was going with what our mutual dynamic had been and, seemingly, agreed upon by us both! When that happens I'm not sure if that's incompatibility or maybe 2 months of faking it, or maybe something I have no idea what it is... my heart hurts.

And after 20yrs of being happily married. Show appreciation. Be his rock..Show physical displays of affection regularly, doesn't have to be sexual. It shows adoration, comfort and security. And donate to the compliment jar at least once a day.

If a guy texts me something like ‘Hey you want to come over later we can order in and snuggle’ as a suggestion for a first date (and assuming that I gave him no indication that I was in a for a quick hookup) I write him off immediately

@ImranKhan-tj3dr

Жыл бұрын

Hi ❤❤

@AdelineCowgirl

3 ай бұрын

I must be pretty naive because if a guy texted me that, I would not assume he meant he wanted to hookup💀😭

@TheCherylish1

2 ай бұрын

​. Same!! 😢 I'm thinking in his mind he can't wait to really snuggle and did he just loves affection I'm 59 and still so naive

@charlottewu2998

Ай бұрын

yes yes yes don’t even bother to respond and to explain yourself!!!!

I feel used when I give so much in a relationship especially when I feel it’s fair to pay for dinners and give gifts to men. Sadly, it’s not a good feeling when they realize how kind you are and they take advantage.

Imma just show up as my sweet self, crack open my heart like a giant shimmering geode of wonderful that I am and if he doesn't like me for the kind hearted, supportive person (with boundaries) that I am, then it's kinda his loss. Eventually the right guy will come around that will treasure me and then I'll give all my love to him, the right person.... instead of wasting it on someone who tries to turn me into someone else💗

@hayleyb467

2 жыл бұрын

love love love this comment! paints a mental picture beautifully!

@alexjessop2887

Жыл бұрын

You go girl x

#3. Enthusiasm and excitement are magnetic. Everyone wants to hang out with someone who is fun! 🙂

@donkidsuzomaris2966

2 жыл бұрын

Hey hello

@donkidsuzomaris2966

2 жыл бұрын

Yeah really nice

@donkidsuzomaris2966

2 жыл бұрын

How are you doing

@llararulens8895

2 жыл бұрын

A real person isn't always fun.

@danielcuevas5899

Жыл бұрын

Very true unfortunately.

Don't invest more into a relationship than your partner is investing. It's a simple formula that never fails. If he invests very little and your doing all the work you appear desperate. It's also a sign that he could take you or leave you. Don't expend another ounce of energy....move on to someone who really WANTS to be with you.

@seeexy

Жыл бұрын

how r u measuring how much s/she's invested?? by what?(im sure its not money.)

@jenshaw8085

Жыл бұрын

@@donk8105Sounds like you’re just not into him. Let him free. Move on.

I do not like texting. My experience is, if they only want to text and not talk on the phone, this is a HUGE red flag!

@paurodriguez8662

Жыл бұрын

Yes is trueeee 💔I should have known before

@jaysunkreuze1466

Жыл бұрын

Jesus women won't put the freaking phone down!

@ssr390

9 ай бұрын

Oh lord I prefer texting...cuz then you can stop the conservation whenever...as an introvert there is nothing more scary than someone talking your ears off

@joulsw3739

3 ай бұрын

Sometimes texts are nice to revisit. A mix of both work well

Yes, you cannot play hard to get. Show him you are interested in getting to know him. Tell him you appreciate him, ask for his advice, be curious and listen well when he shares something big with you. Be a giver, not just a taker.

@gregorie3752

2 жыл бұрын

I think u should play hard to get a little bit

@gregorie3752

2 жыл бұрын

At first, just a little, dont be tooooo easy.

@courtneyjames8223

Жыл бұрын

I'm playing hard to get it's safer..I stop texting this guy he was annoyed all the time I have him space now he keeps calling and texting me..I think he is getting a little scared.lmfao I don't care I can play it to!!

@floritacastro683

Жыл бұрын

Not too easy with them.. they love the challenge and the mystery

@redfather5342

Жыл бұрын

@@gregorie3752 wrong

For me, when I quit trying to hook a man and realized it wasn’t my road to fulfillment, I made room for all kinds of other incredible magic in my life. Then, my partner just showed up. No trying, no self blame thinking I was somehow not good enough-I just changed my focus. The one I was waiting for had been there all along-it was me.

@claraht.6999

14 күн бұрын

I ❤ IT! SO BEAUTIFUL.....

No one communicates by talking anymore. That’s a huge problem with the way relationships are these days. Social media, dating apps, texting. Lol none of it is good if you’re actually serious about finding a relationship.

@freedomtruth7418

2 жыл бұрын

well i will say this here, if you are friends with the person first you wont have to go by rules of what not to say, your partner is not only your person you want to date they are suppose to be your best friend and you both tell each other everything so you both can work on each others flaws together, then you can build with that person love isn't rules what is meant to be will be just be yourself act normal and be the persons friend first then go from there then in the end you will get what you want in the end because with that person to built a bound as a union then the man will marry you just relax and be spontaneous be free be honest be loyal and follow your heart and you will be okay, not expecting the man to do everything be bold take care and work with him he is human and so are you live life enjoy life together and free yourself from love rules and then you will get what you really want from that man because in the end true love wins over any rule in the book of love rules of someone else's opinions not all men are the same nor the women so I'm just saying here this go with the flow and flow your heart your love way will come naturally if you just chill out and relax be loyal honest and most importantly become your lovers best friend than all things of true love will come together naturally. good luck everyone bye bye

@georgialee6755

2 жыл бұрын

bnb0510 Correct! It’s already hard enough sometimes to communicate in person - never mind all the texting garbage. A lot of young people are in for a rude awakening where their relationships are concerned. They’re not going to know how to communicate when problems come up - and there will be problems along the way.

@TheCherylish1

2 ай бұрын

Antisocial media

i love this advice for woman but this way of dating and this way of thinking is just for women, isn't it? i mean men don't act like that at all. they just think of sex all the time, especially when they're dating someone . but actually i got a great tip from my boyfriend that something like spanish fly enhanicng the whole expereince is the best and should be for all the couples

Utilize that voice message button. Text can easily be misconstrued and screw up everything. Nothing beats human voice. It's not what we say, it's how we say it.

"Communicate your standards in an attractive way!!!!"

This is funny. I'm already married with kids, but I'm watching this and realizing everything I've done wrong with men in the past. Like, everything!

@mewho6199

Жыл бұрын

So how did you get married? You must have done something right. Perhaps you should make your own videos.

@michalpitowsky

Жыл бұрын

@@mewho6199 It's a long story how I ended up with my husbend. I do make videos, I have a booktube channel in Hebrew 😉 Been watching this channel because Im writing a novel about dating.

@mewho6199

Жыл бұрын

@@michalpitowsky Cool.

@udou9877

Жыл бұрын

@@michalpitowsky WOW!! That's Awesome!!! 🤓📖 Can u think of anything that wasn't mentioned that u did diff that worked well for u? If I may ask... what kind of novel r u writing? Like a fiction love story or rules of dating gone bad? 😁♥ LOL

*Building a connection in the early stages of dating is important, but let's prioritize being authentic and true to ourselves. Focus on shared interests, open conversations, and mutual respect.*

Ladies please don't initiate contact first to prove you're an 'adult' as men that really want to go on a 2nd 3rd or 4th date with you will definitely make the phone call or txt first.... Men never feel like they need your 'permission' to call you 🤣📞 if he wants you he will do what it takes and if he doesnt plenty more fish in the sea :)

@georgialee6755

2 жыл бұрын

Wonder Woman You are absolutely correct! Let the man do the initiating and more of the work - and he will if he’s interested. Let the man be the man and the woman be the woman.

@jayc342009

2 жыл бұрын

@@georgialee6755 so many women don't let the man take initiative anymore

ladies, gents, always forever, remember this: if you treat someone as if they're a star, they'll treat you as if you're a fan...

My current boyfriend actually thanked me for cuddling after our first time, men really do want the same thing as us

@ImranKhan-tj3dr

Жыл бұрын

I m here ❤❤❤🌷🌷🌷🌷🙋🙋

@TheDemsk

27 күн бұрын

I've never experienced a man wanting the same as us. Your boyfriend is the outlier.

Our first date was skydiving. I'm not suggesting that for everyone but doing something thrilling really helped forge a bond because we did something ... experienced something together that none of the friends in our various circles can relate to. It was the first time for both of us and it encouraged us to do more firsts together. We

@dayanacba

2 жыл бұрын

Be careful with that kind of experiences, it's a love bombing tecnique in a narc.

@freshstrt3140

2 жыл бұрын

@@dayanacba good. call.

@90MysteriumFascinans

2 жыл бұрын

This is a known scientific finding. I wonder... I’m sure there are men who do this on purpose.

@chasingsunsetske

2 жыл бұрын

Woow! We went played a tennis match. It was a nice and easy first time meet

@freedomtruth7418

2 жыл бұрын

well i will say this here, if you are friends with the person first you wont have to go by rules of what not to say, your partner is not only your person you want to date they are suppose to be your best friend and you both tell each other everything so you both can work on each others flaws together, then you can build with that person love isn't rules what is meant to be will be just be yourself act normal and be the persons friend first then go from there then in the end you will get what you want in the end because with that person to built a bound as a union then the man will marry you just relax and be spontaneous be free be honest be loyal and follow your heart and you will be okay, not expecting the man to do everything be bold take care and work with him he is human and so are you live life enjoy life together and free yourself from love rules and then you will get what you really want from that man because in the end true love wins over any rule in the book of love rules of someone else's opinions not all men are the same nor the women so I'm just saying here this go with the flow and flow your heart your love way will come naturally if you just chill out and relax be loyal honest and most importantly become your lovers best friend than all things of true love will come together naturally. good luck everyone bye bye

As a woman, I am ready to commit to a relationship with a man when I feel safe, secure, loved and respected by that man.

I hate phone calls in general. I only call if there is a good reason or to avoid a misunderstanding. I prefer texting, it's quiet, you don't interrupt people, and you can always come back and reread the text to make sure you got it right. I loved the "bliss point" part. Very useful.

@madambutrfly23

Жыл бұрын

Texting shows lack of social skills. How can you not want to hear the person's voice? What did you do before texting? To me texting is lazy. I want to speak to someone. Most people do.

@zazu3006

Жыл бұрын

texting is the new social skill! i’m all for it and a phone call when it feels nice, not an only choice

@savanahb3637

Жыл бұрын

How can you like someone and not want to eventually physically talk to them . Seems immature

@sunbeam9222

Жыл бұрын

Eew some of the guys I met text the relationship away, the latest one even split up through text lol I find it so immature. Whenever there was a misunderstanding I d pick up the phone to clear the air, and he wouldn't respond preferring to argue over texts, I couldn't handle this crap. People hiding behind the wall , never again, it's so childish imo.

@lanigirl01

7 ай бұрын

I used to hate it but I found if a guy really likes you he'll call you. If he just texts....it's not serious.

*Me as a man watching Matthew explain things and realizing he's totally got me pegged* "Somebody, stop him! He's ruining what little power we have left!"

I am actually in a happy relationship and only here because its still rock solid life advice thats totally worth hearing.

@lesezeichen1603

2 жыл бұрын

:)

Whaaa, I’m late 50s and watching dating advice!! My husband died six years ago and I haven’t dated much. I’m more afraid now. It all used to be easier. I am learning here! It is fun and encouraging. Thank you!

@debmccafferty1007

Жыл бұрын

I'm in my late sixties, widowed, it's anything goes now. Many predators. Careful.

Love these! Bonuses are spot on! Also, figure out if you actually want him to be hooked on you before trying to hook him. The last thing you want as a woman is to accidentally invite a stalker or a narcissist into your life because you're not focusing on using these tips with the right guy. Or like stated towards the end, running on ego. I'm not even sure how I got here though... I've been happily dating myself for 4 yrs 😂

@belove751

Жыл бұрын

That’s great advice tho. Been there done that.

#4 had me rolling 😂😂😂 so true!! Not even people in general like to pick up their phone like a grown up to talk on the phone. Most people all they want to do is just text.

@freedomtruth7418

2 жыл бұрын

well i will say this here, if you are friends with the person first you wont have to go by rules of what not to say, your partner is not only your person you want to date they are suppose to be your best friend and you both tell each other everything so you both can work on each others flaws together, then you can build with that person love isn't rules what is meant to be will be just be yourself act normal and be the persons friend first then go from there then in the end you will get what you want in the end because with that person to built a bound as a union then the man will marry you just relax and be spontaneous be free be honest be loyal and follow your heart and you will be okay, not expecting the man to do everything be bold take care and work with him he is human and so are you live life enjoy life together and free yourself from love rules and then you will get what you really want from that man because in the end true love wins over any rule in the book of love rules of someone else's opinions not all men are the same nor the women so I'm just saying here this go with the flow and flow your heart your love way will come naturally if you just chill out and relax be loyal honest and most importantly become your lovers best friend than all things of true love will come together naturally. good luck everyone bye bye

@eveheart2876

Жыл бұрын

Yep 👍🏿

@eveheart2876

Жыл бұрын

I like texting sometimes

@Lifestartat40s

2 ай бұрын

Yes, they put the caption...text only, no call😅

Wow, I have been doing everything wrong. I usually end up driving them away or they pull back. I've been told " you're a lot" " you're too much" or " I can't keep up with you." I get so excited easily. I guess I scare them off. It sucks I feel things intensely or too passionate. I hear so much dating advice that's contradictory.

When I met my husband in 1986, it was instant chemistry- but he told me no when I offered him my phone number. He said he needed to be the one to ask for it. I loved that. He’s a gentleman and very masculine. We’re best friends. We’ve always been in love whether with new babies, teen years, elderly parents, and now as empty nesters. Our son takes after him and so do our sons in law. So happy our daughters have real men. Thanks for all you do.

@user-mb9jx5tx9y

Жыл бұрын

A guy offered his number to me and it was a huge turn off to me. I told him I don’t take numbers down and he started acting different afterwards

@TheCherylish1

2 ай бұрын

Clone that man

… be an adult. That’s my favourite line. Not even professional communicators are competent at doing that. Instead they let their ego take over and make assumptions and beat around the bush and do shady things to avoid telling the truth. This is a life lesson people should learn when they’re 7 not when there in their 30s and 40s. Speak up..,,wake up….grow up.

@freshstrt3140

2 жыл бұрын

Dude.... 🙏🏽🤦🏼‍♀️🙌🏽

I have been with my husband for almost 17 years. My standards were high when I met him and they still are. We have the kind of relationship that people dream of. Standards are super important for communication! And communication is the bedrock.

@jamielawrence4749

11 ай бұрын

How did you balance the communication standards with giving someone the benefit of the doubt? I feel I have very high standards but not many people can reach them because of life, attention issues, emotional or maturity issues or who knows... the difficulty is knowing when to let something slide and when to call it out. I HATE lack of communication but, again, I have high standards because I tend to over communicate to people. Any advice much appreciated. I'm at the point in a relationship where someone has changed his communication openness with me after 2 months feeling safe and open with hi.. it's super bizarre and confusing and I'm unsure how to proceed.

@spiritual2020

11 ай бұрын

@@jamielawrence4749 What?! After 2 months he finally makes the first move with a Hi text? That’s what it sounds like your saying. Is that correct? If so, that is beyond odd.

We are grateful for your channel Matt!

setting up boundaries is a priority. After 25 year marriage starting dating in my almost 50's is very challenging lol. Thank you for the video

Wise, wise, wise advice. I've successfully used some of the texts and I return to these videos for review when I'm dating. Communicate your standards with confidence to create the bliss point attraction. Mirror their energy. Don't make them a priority or give them boyfriend status before they have earned that right. Don not reach out anytime you're craving attention. Thanks Matthew & Team!

Matthew you're amazing 😭 I'm so glad I found your channel. On the last segment where you talk about the 5 things you should do to manage your energy I literally sobbed because these are all the things I've been doing wrong for years now. Each one. I give way too much of myself.. And this whole time I've been wondering why I always end up being in one sided relationships (friendships and intimate) and now I know why. It's emotionally draining and after a while it can really break your spirit. These are all things I really needed guidance with so thank you so much for making this 😭 I'm going to really try and implement your wisdom.

The girls talking with your voice at 4:57 just made my day

Your suggestions are so candid and valuable! Thank you Matthew for this video. It is a gift!

You changed my life with your videos

You have really helped me Matthew. I have been really struggling in the dating process after coming out of a 7 year relationship with a toxic man. I grew up watching toxicity within my parents marriage. It has been hard to break the cycle in my own life and even harder to walk away from someone I want because I know they don’t meet my standards but your videos help me get out of my head and focus on what is truly important and that loving ourselves the most. Thank you for your content!

I really love everything he's saying. He's giving great advice

Its like this video was meant for me!!! I did this (setting standards) before I saw this but its like cosmic confirmation that I am doing the right thing! Thanks Matthew!!

I subscribed at "buy the popcorn" because this I something I have always done and the reaction by the man has always been positive. Often they even mention how nice it was. I sent this video to myself for the next four mornings to watch it every day

This was life changing and amazing. Thank you so much and have a good day. I really needed to hear this

I love this series of videos! Is like watching a big brother and friend 🙏🏻🤗 funny thing is that a spiritual coach all of these amazing points are my routine 👌🏻

The part about calling & Alexander Graham Bell made me laugh because texting with my brother once (& I was getting tired) he said, “ You do realize you have a phone in your hand, right?”😀

@freedomtruth7418

2 жыл бұрын

well i will say this here, if you are friends with the person first you wont have to go by rules of what not to say, your partner is not only your person you want to date they are suppose to be your best friend and you both tell each other everything so you both can work on each others flaws together, then you can build with that person love isn't rules what is meant to be will be just be yourself act normal and be the persons friend first then go from there then in the end you will get what you want in the end because with that person to built a bound as a union then the man will marry you just relax and be spontaneous be free be honest be loyal and follow your heart and you will be okay, not expecting the man to do everything be bold take care and work with him he is human and so are you live life enjoy life together and free yourself from love rules and then you will get what you really want from that man because in the end true love wins over any rule in the book of love rules of someone else's opinions not all men are the same nor the women so I'm just saying here this go with the flow and flow your heart your love way will come naturally if you just chill out and relax be loyal honest and most importantly become your lovers best friend than all things of true love will come together naturally. good luck everyone bye bye

I love how you stretch the importance of communication though! So both can be unpredicatably crazy, want a deep relationship, a chill fling or whatever, they just need to be on the same page about it.

My dear, I'm 48 years old and while I appreciate your videos, perhaps it's time you do something for the men cause they have no idea. Show them how to be a man. Show them how to win and sustain the woman's interest. Tell them the difference between a boy and a man. Tell them its easy to win a woman but its not in the winning, its in the journey. I want to see you doing that to show the men how to be real men.

@madelynnazario8361

2 жыл бұрын

You are so right about what you say. Men do need to learn how to be men. It's important to know how to sustain a relationship long term. I stopped dating because I encountered men who have no clue on how to date and act like men. Its gets old to see how some act. I've noticed that some younger men act more emotionally mature than men my age. Who wants to be dating a man who is clueless and classless.? They need to step up to the plate.

@jennycyl3595

2 жыл бұрын

@@madelynnazario8361 I am at a stage in my life that i dont need a man but i would want one that could live it up. However, i couldnt find one yet and like you, i'm giving up. The older i get, the more standards i have but luckily, the more independent I am

@ChaosAngel667

2 жыл бұрын

There are channels for that but they dont contain the content you expect. Men dont "win and sustain" a woman interest by doing something for her, we do it by bettering ourselves. If we buy flowers, chocolates, gifts, etc. That gets immediate attention but not something sustainable. On the other hand if we are doing our grind, leading a good life and having a healthy body women will naturally give us attention and we can choose who we reciprocate. Men are real men when they focus on their purpose, not on women.

@jennycyl3595

2 жыл бұрын

@@ChaosAngel667 it's true but a real man would want to do it for his woman too. I believe a lot of women would agree with me on this. No need the flowers & chocolates but the genuine care, concern, the leadership by example, the having our interests at heart all goes a long way

@ChaosAngel667

2 жыл бұрын

@@jennycyl3595 thats YOUR definition of a real man. Many of us grew up with that definition and tried to apply it only to get disrespected. Thats why real men define themselves based on their purpose, not on female standards.

This is actually solid advice, huh. Usually people are not this insightful with relationship advice in my experience. Nice 👏👏👏

This is the best relationship message I've heard.

This is amazing!! I’m 6 months out of a very draining relationship that happened too fast and before I knew it … i was in and it was too much. I was very accommodating but I’m just recovering energy wise. It’s taken 6 months as I work a lot n give a lot emotionally n physically on my job. This video is excellent! Thank you!!

Wow, Matthew. Your videos are amazing. I love that you don’t beat around the bush. You get straight to the point. I really appreciate all your comments and advice. Thank you for your help. I’m a 79 year old widow who just joined a dating site. I’ve already met a very nice guy online. Your advice is very important to me.

Wow. Confidence & Competence. Thank you for this material.

Dear Matthew thank you for your open and honest videos and the easy to understand format which you produce them in. For me the part of the video that resonated was giving too much energy away too quickly without knowing if the person is worthy of it. Or oversharing too soon. My dad had left our family when I was 9 and since then I’ve noticed myself leaving relationships so that I don’t get hurt or being extremely drawn to guys who don’t give me enough and are quite distant. But observing certain tendencies is the first step to changing them for healthier habits. 😊

Amazingly well put together video!! You're awesome!

Holy God !! I can't believe how helpful this video has been. How I wish I had seen this before I started seeing this guy a year and a half ago. I see everywhere I went wrong. I did start watching your videos back in summer 2020, before I met him, but then of course I got sidetracked by our relationship and didn't go back to your informative advice. Thankyou Matthew

Thank you for this insightful video Matt! I badly need to see and hear this 🥺🙏💯

I had a date with this guy. A male friend at work said to me, "You know what would impress him, to offer to pay for dinner. Women never do and that would really impress him." So we ate at Chilis for our date, when the check came I said "I will pay" and he said "thanks." I barely had enough on me to pay for it, he didn't even offer to leave the tip. When I told my friend about it, he was shocked and said "no real man would have let you pay." Yeah, well. Next time I will say we can go dutch.

@georgialee6755

2 жыл бұрын

Always let the man pay, especially the first and second time. A male friend of mine once told me “ It’s a respect thing” I didn’t get it at the time - I was in my 20’s - but later I did. A woman needs to allow the man to act like the man - doesn’t matter what year it is, or how far women have come.

@ray076NL

Жыл бұрын

@@georgialee6755 you know what solves this issue? pay for your own shit.

@thejherimiharmoniexperience

Жыл бұрын

Curious if the co-worker who gave you advice is the type of man you’d want to date. No healthy masculine man would appreciate you paying for the dinner.

What a great, truly inspiring stories you have ❤️🙌 I wish there were more KZreadrs like you. All the best 😇

@freedomtruth7418

2 жыл бұрын

well i will say this here, if you are friends with the person first you wont have to go by rules of what not to say, your partner is not only your person you want to date they are suppose to be your best friend and you both tell each other everything so you both can work on each others flaws together, then you can build with that person love isn't rules what is meant to be will be just be yourself act normal and be the persons friend first then go from there then in the end you will get what you want in the end because with that person to built a bound as a union then the man will marry you just relax and be spontaneous be free be honest be loyal and follow your heart and you will be okay, not expecting the man to do everything be bold take care and work with him he is human and so are you live life enjoy life together and free yourself from love rules and then you will get what you really want from that man because in the end true love wins over any rule in the book of love rules of someone else's opinions not all men are the same nor the women so I'm just saying here this go with the flow and flow your heart your love way will come naturally if you just chill out and relax be loyal honest and most importantly become your lovers best friend than all things of true love will come together naturally. good luck everyone bye bye

I have a request Can you please do a video on how to have a successful relationship with an avoidant man who deeply loves you but disappears when triggered. When it comes to doing something that appears it’s a going to a deeper level of commitment

This is one of the best videos I’ve watched of yours. Thank you 😊 I love all of your content.

Ok besides being easy on the eyes, omg I can listen to him talk all day long. Love. Love, his voice.

@ImranKhan-tj3dr

Жыл бұрын

Or u marriad ?? 👧👧❤❤🌷🌷🌷

Love yourself more. Period

Matt I came to see you many years ago and your advice is light years from where you were many years back to then.. it felt samey, boring and like every other dating coach out there.. to be honest it didn’t feel authentic! Fast forward 10 years and you have found YOUR VOICE, these videos are absolutely amazing 🤩 Great advice without confusion or over explanation.. clear, concise and definitely works. I say definitely works because it’s what I am doing already and I’m seeing results. Thank you Matt for confirming that I’m indeed doing what I ought to be doing wether I get the guy or not.. at least I’m valuing myself and setting boundaries. Can’t wait for more from you.❤

I cannot get enough of your videos! I'm in the early dating stages with a guy who I've known since we were younger so it's not as awkward or anything but this video helped me soooo much and I really feel like we're both into each other the same amount and could have something great! I cannot express enough how helpful your videos have been so thank you so much! Please never stop posting! 😊

@TheLadyDelirium

4 ай бұрын

How did it go?

@swinxfee

4 ай бұрын

How did it go?

I watched a lot of this guy's videos when I started dating my current husband. I think that's all that needs to be said lol.

This man is full of wisdom! A true mind reader.

Hey Matthew,I've come across this video like at the right moment. I was browsing Facebook and I came across your clips about relationships and I had to come on KZread and watch this video. This is the perfect time I wanted to hear this so thank you so much. It's like Awakening call to me. I've been repeating the same mistakes every time every single time. I'm happy that I found you. Much love and God bless and keep doing the positive good work❤❤

Amazing!! Been seeing someone new after breaking up with a one year toxic person. Just right on time!!❤️❤️❤️

@freedomtruth7418

2 жыл бұрын

well i will say this here, if you are friends with the person first you wont have to go by rules of what not to say, your partner is not only your person you want to date they are suppose to be your best friend and you both tell each other everything so you both can work on each others flaws together, then you can build with that person love isn't rules what is meant to be will be just be yourself act normal and be the persons friend first then go from there then in the end you will get what you want in the end because with that person to built a bound as a union then the man will marry you just relax and be spontaneous be free be honest be loyal and follow your heart and you will be okay, not expecting the man to do everything be bold take care and work with him he is human and so are you live life enjoy life together and free yourself from love rules and then you will get what you really want from that man because in the end true love wins over any rule in the book of love rules of someone else's opinions not all men are the same nor the women so I'm just saying here this go with the flow and flow your heart your love way will come naturally if you just chill out and relax be loyal honest and most importantly become your lovers best friend than all things of true love will come together naturally. good luck everyone bye bye

@lyricgirl2012

2 жыл бұрын

one thing to notice when someone is for you is see how many times you both meet without even setting the meeting. told this one guy that im leaving him to do other stuff. if the universe brings us together again ill talk to you again and we can continue seeing one another. we never texted any future arrangements. he took off work to come looking for me the following day, had no clue where or when ill be out somewhere. He just knew he wanted to have me. I woke up and decided to walk to the store and crossed over into the parking lot and saw his vehicle. soon as we got closer to speak, i told him i saw you first, "he said," no. I saw you first". I tried to laugh but i was so damn aggravated that day about my life situation and conditions I couldnt laugh or even think about how we ended up meeting up again. so now a few days passed and all of a sudden my period didnt come on. I started thinking about all the times we messed around for 4 months without a condom. and he was snipped. I looked and dug into some research on how possible is it that i could be pregnant if he visited a phlebotomist and got a vasectomy years ago before we even met. I plan on buying a baby shoe and throwing at him next time i see him and saying, " what have you done". you got some explaining to do mr. Im suppose to be joining the air force soon. I cannot be pregnant. He called but he always call from uknown numbers. but ive been ignoring him because im trying to wait to see if my period will come on soon. im scared to go even buy a preg test. and im not going to kill any child. i dont believe in it.

@lyricgirl2012

2 жыл бұрын

also we like each other and i ended up loving him and broke his shades infont of him because he wasnt ready for that yet. he looked and did nothing. i told him he making me too stressed out. now he still wants to see me. he loves a little crzy cause im an Aries that is crazy when someone stressed me out. Plus he use to be in the army and has grown up kids. And enjoys our time together. He always try to ask me if i wanna try this or that and if i dont he makes sure he doesnt do it again. He cares about my feelings as i do his. He is actually the guy ive always wanted to have. his fat ass. im slim and cute. hes ok with his looks but hes cute because hes a very short guy and i like that. plus hes shy and yells when upset. i like that kind of aggressive behavior.

The contribution part is true for women as well. Naturally, I am a giver. I give my all and then some, but VERY RARELY do others give anything such as effort towards me. And that’s something I want as well in all types of relationships in my life -> not necessarily equal, but FAiR contribution from the other person, rather than just me putting in effort. I’ve been told by a friends, coworkers and a lot of acquaintances that I’ve got a heart of gold and my mom used to tell me and others that I don’t have a single mean bone in my body.🙈 My infinite, unconditional love, kindness and compassion for everyone often results in me getting taken advantage of.🙈Lol

@artistevivien

2 жыл бұрын

Oh god are you me? Stay strong fellow empathetic soul ❤️

@_metal.queen_

2 жыл бұрын

@@artistevivien Always !💪🏼💛🕊😁

@anamargaridaesteves

2 жыл бұрын

You have to be all that for yourself too, not just for others. And when you do, there’s boundaries and there’s no boundaries crossed or you walk away. You stop giving to the wrong person. It’s not only them. It’s us too. We allow them to treat us that way.

@_metal.queen_

2 жыл бұрын

@@anamargaridaesteves don’t worry, I’ve realized and have been working on this for myself within the last couple of years ! 😁🥰

I recently came across your channel and subscribed right away. Cant believe I've been missing out on so much quality content.

Thank you Mathew for all Of your great advice. My dating life has already begun to improve since watching your videos over the last couple of weeks. Keep up the amazing work, you have definitely made a positive impact on many lives ❤

Life is like dating, all new relationships, work, clients, meeting new people, starting new business ventures etc... You need to set standards from the beginning and be communicative

Wow I just love this guy!! Everything he has to say is so very helpful:)

This is amazing. I am such a giver and give her and give her and in the end I always sit back, saying I gave it all and got nothing but breadcrumbs I have to learn to slow my roll.

You touched on key points in this video, that I really needed to hear. Especially the section that talks about how you respond after getting intimate with someone. I usually become very vulnerable and lay a whole bunch of expectations on that person, due to past experiences that involved being ditched immediately after intimacy. Thank you for addressing this issue. I am going to keep it in mind, and work on building up my self confidence and managing my insecurities, so I do not put projections onto the person immediately after intimacy.

Thanks Matthew... Every word of this video makes sense... shall take it on board as I step into my new journey to finding love again... but this time reciprocity.... 🙂🙏💜

I appreciate you sharing this information!

It feels good to hear you 😃 im feelin refreshed. Thank you

Matthew Hussey - you really are just livin your best life. 🎉 LOVE IT!!!

I've been doing some of these, already. Glad to know I'm on the right path. 😁 I'll be sure to watch this a few more times, to remind myself of what I should continue doing, and what I should start doing. Thanks, again, Matthew!

@lanigirl01

7 ай бұрын

Same here unbeknownst to me! Heading in the right direction.

I love you Matt. My dad was diagnosed w dementia when I was 9 and you’ve helped me so much as far as not having male guidance in my life

@mitziburnett975

Жыл бұрын

I am so sorry so hard. My mother was older and I felt ripped off when she passed I was 33. I can’t imagine your loss. I purposely got married much younger and had my child as soon as I could so I wouldn’t do that to her.

Thanks for articulating some great points Matthew!

What a great video. Probably the best you’ve done so far. Thanks.

Giving the energy to a person that gives his first it’s the most amazing Other than that this generation of time that we are living in we desperately need to get such lesson coz now most people think it’s all about getting what you are looking for in that person and it is nerve racking

man i love your content! thank you for educating us in a understandable respectful manner and also for showing us both sides of dating 😉

I really enjoyed this video, and I'll admit I learned a few things about where I went wrong in my last two relationships! Thanks so much Matthew ❤

I'm glad i bumped into this video. You just gained a new subscriber. I need to learn to communicate my standards effectively.

I'm so sick of having to 'tippy toe' around men, not being able to be the true me as apparently they don't like women like me. I'm done, truly done, I'm sick of the games, the hot'n cold, the ghosting, I'm so over it....😰

I loved this video so much!! First all the useful, clear and positive information. Second, the creativity and the pace, so good, beautifully made. Thank you so much for such a good content.

Жыл бұрын

1

Love listening to these videos at the perfect timing every day! 🥰❤️

Nice video Matt. Love the info. I think your hair looks great in this video