Divorce & Family Home | Refinance, Buyout, Or Sell | Dave Ramsey's Advice
Divorce & Family Home | Refinance, Buyout, Or Sell | Dave Ramsey's Advice
Should we sell our house as part of a divorce
Comment 1 - I have not worked for 14 years…….
When one spouse is not working or even when both spouses are working and you are getting a divorce keep this in mind. You both have a combined income that you have become accustomed to and to utilize in paying the bills together.
Comment 2 - child support payments will be substantial?
What happens when you divorce is you now have 2 separate sets of living expenses when the other party moves out of the home. If there are children involved and there will be spousal support and child support paid to one or the other, the standard of living drops no matter what.
Comment 3 - He is still in the home due to finances We can’t afford for him to leave
This is very common. We find that at least 50% of our clients are still living together prior to filing for divorce. Especially in this situation where you have to make a decision on how you are going to make it work in regards to the home.
Comment 4 - do we sell the house - yes - I can’t afford the house….
So you can see how easy it is for a 3rd party to make a decision on whether to sell or try to keep the home. It is an easy decision when there is no emotional attachment to the home.
But when you are the parties involved and in this case there are two minor children, it has been my experience that the first thing the parties will try to do is find a way to keep the home for the benefit of the children, even when on paper, financially, it does not make sense and in many cases is not likely they could pull it off. Or as the very worst, the house be a financial burden as Dave says.
Comment 4 - Rent something as cheaply as you can.
This is another issue that comes up with our clients. The are finding out that that to rent a home after their divorce in many cases will result in a higher payment, especially if they are looking for something similar to what they had. In many cases, even renting a 1 bedroom apartment can be more than the current mortgage we’ve seen in a few cases. This is another reason we see our clients trying to hang onto the family home. The problem is, that is one spouse keeps the house, how to buyout the other party if you can’t or don’t want to refinance?
Video 2 - Overview - Once Divorce is decided the Marriage is turned into business transaction
Comment # 1 - House should either be sold or if refinanced into the name of the person keeping the home.
The advice that Dave give is the most logical advice. The issue becomes that if one spouse stays in the home and is unable to refinance then both parties will remain on the mortgage. The issue this poses is that if the spouse were to default on the mortgage, both spouses credit would be impacted.
Another issue is that this could impact the spouse who did not keep the home from purchasing another one.
Despite this being seemingly logical, we have many clients who decide to keep the house, keeping one spouse in the home, both staying on the mortgage. They are deciding to do this mostly because there are minor children. They may decide to keep in this fashion until the kids turn 18 and then agree to sell at that time.
Another decision couples are making currently is to hold the property jointly, whether one lives there or not or they rent it, to hopefully allow time to pass for the home values to go back up so there are more proceeds to split. Whether this is because they recently bought the home and there are no proceeds after the realtor gets paid or they simply want to get more out of the home.
Comment 2 - if you were a single guy would you buy that house.
Sometimes the decision to keep the house really does not make sense. We’ve had couples agree that one spouse would keep the family home that was 5,000 square feet. This house was great when they were raising their 5 children, but now the wife will be living here alone in this giant house with a equally giant mortgage.
Comment 3 - she can’t afford it -she shouldn’t stay in the house.
This goes back to what I was previously saying - and we find our clients in this exact position trying to figure out a way to keep the home for the children’s sake. While it may make sense on paper not to keep the home many of our clients are deciding to do so which is totally fine if that is what you agree to in the divorce.
Comment 4 - sell the house and split the proceeds and stay in general area…
In my opinion this is the cleanest break. You guys just sell the house and split the equity.
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I’m many cases it doesn’t make sense to keep the family home, but our clients find some creative ways to make it work
@kengi1600
3 ай бұрын
If she tries to buy me out do I have to agree?I don't want her to have the house she commited adultery and I feel she doesn't deserve it. She makes the money Im the stay at hm dad.
Easy to say "just sell the house and find an another place". But what if there is nowhere else to move to. I mean rental vacancy is less than 1% and home prices are through the roof for what there is on the market.
@stephenwatkin18
2 ай бұрын
The court does not care, pay your alimony and child support!
Well this is my plan, I'm going through a divorce right now so once we split and sell the house I am going to wait till the market crashes then I will pay cash for a little home in the middle of boom fart nowhere.. no mortgage At 57 I am not getting into another 30 year mortgage , I am retiring at 62 and living as a minimalist.. This so-called American dream ain't but American dream when you're asleep..
@basicprogrammer6147
7 ай бұрын
My plan exactly. I am just about to turn 57, and she divorced me after 24 years because I blocked her mother's phone number.
@Thunder-lightning852
6 ай бұрын
I’m almost 61 married to a narcissist who decided to cash out because of her narcissist friends, who has done nothing but destruction in my life and my kids who are all adults and want nothing to do with her because of her behavior, the emotional and financial abuse over the last 27 years of marriage Has been brutal. I have been eight months of no contact after being discarded. I am tired of being a doormat, fixing all the financial problems that she has caused over the years, Bellinger out of jail, etc. etc. I’m just trying to find some justice
@basicprogrammer6147
6 ай бұрын
@@Thunder-lightning852 At least I don't feel so all alone after reading these comments. It's the lonely feeling of failure that really gets to me. I loved my beautiful bride. But then... she aged. She became a different person. I could not get her to read, eat right, exercise, talk to me, let alone hug or kiss me. It's like they eventually all become demons. But then... I see old people who are still together. And they look like friends. They made it, where very few people do. Life and this world are very strange. I think that in 200-300 years, the world population will rapidly decline. Then, everyone will have anything they want. Robots will do all the work. There will be zero crime. There will be no loneliness because AI sex dolls will be far advanced. People won't have more children than they can handle. Energy, food, and housing will be virtually free. People will enjoy no pollution, endless exercise outside, books, music, everything. I see it. I see the light.
@clodiamandes7153
5 ай бұрын
@@basicprogrammer6147 Rubber dolls get you tired,I think. We all need the warmth of a human close to us. You are describing a situation where you did expect a lot of a woman. You do not to mention anything else after "why can't you just loose weight" Ideas start floating in our head and sorry,but you are out. It is not the intention, its the way things are said. Good Luck!
@deborahwilcox5716
Ай бұрын
Smart
💥 NEVER GET MARRIED DON'T BE STUPID....
Hi Tim, thanks for the info in this video, I should have looked for this earlier. My soon to be ex-wife have been together for 15 years and married for 8. It was only in the married phase where we purchased an our home together and commingled the incomes. Long story short, one day right after COVID, my wife just left the home, withdrew half or the savings account funds and gave me a buyout price for the house. We both have substantial retirement accounts and we amicably agreed that what is in those accounts is off the table. So in reality it’s just the house and although like you said the economics on paper do not make sense for me to stay in the house but moving is stressful and buying another place to live is not as easy as one might think in the great state of TX. I know you can’t say too much but my question to you from a philosophy point of view is should I just do buyout, get her name off the deed and hold on the property for another couple of years till I retire and then sell? Hopefully the interest rates will be lower and the ability to get an appreciated valuation is what I was planning. Is this thought process for an amicable divorce a good one, or is there pitfalls to draining a savings account rather than investing that money in preparation for retirement. Yes I can afford to expenses because there is no mortgage. Thank you for any insight you have from your experience with amicable divorces.
I don't understand as a father of four why we make our children so weak when in most instances they adjust way better than we adults do when it comes to moving.. " Kids start packing up your rooms we got to go! This is how tribes handle real life throughout mankind history. Guess I'm just old school that way " it worked out fine for us..
@lisachristinaconfirmed5067
Ай бұрын
Stability is waaaay better. Those kids weren’t raised like tribes to begin with.
What about release of liability on the mortgage?
What if you are both on the title for the mortgage, does that mean you still have to refinance or can you simply ship it over into the other spouses name?
I'm going through a divorce in Virginia and have a home that I want to keep and pay my wife her share of equity. I'm the only one on the deed and only one on the mortgage. How would her share be divided and is it 50%of the equity or 50% of the 80% your mortgage company allows you to take out
Not easy
What if no kids, house is paid off and have money in the bank but both want the house?
The husband is filing for the divotce after he abandoned his family more than 2 years ago...now he wants 50% payo for the house and yet he has another property and he is not prepared to give 50% of that property....ut
That's gets them all the time. They want to keep it but they can't verify employment and refinance to keep the house 😂
She filed for divorce and demanded sole possession of the home. In order to begin her process, she first filed for an order of protection. At the OP hearing, she sobbed and the female judge kicked me out for a year. The year is almost up. Neither party wishes to sell the home or move out. What happens?
@CallsItLikeISeizeIts
3 ай бұрын
Move back in😂
@basicprogrammer6147
3 ай бұрын
@@CallsItLikeISeizeIts We've been ordered to sell the home. I cannot afford my living expenses, so I requested it. But I thought her family would help us. But they did not. The world is a very cruel place.
@becky-ye3ho
2 күн бұрын
@@basicprogrammer6147 you didn’t have the chance to buy it because the judge didn’t allow it because of financial reasons. Hang in there , sending well wishes your way.
Any advice for farmer's wife.. Long marriage. Ex does not want to give me Anything. Gave my life & soul to farm home & family.
@divorce661
4 ай бұрын
Only advice is to consult with an attorney as I only handle amicable divorce cases in California.
@attractarattigan3574
3 күн бұрын
@@divorce661Thank you from fush pastures in Ireland.
My ex removed me from my home and my 15 yr old grandson . Illegally and I am on title and deed and he abandoned the home 7 yrs ago . He remarried and has a new home and new family . He locked up all mine and my grandsons belongings and no one is living currently in the home . We have been homeless now for 8 months . Due to the card my ex pulled .
@deborahwilcox5716
Ай бұрын
Oh my goodness, this is the worst situation you are in. I am so sorry. Get some legal help for free from your county. Coercive control. Illegal in CA. ALSO, If you were married when you purchased the home the judge can force the sale of the home. The law is on your side. Also, that is physical violence which is corrosive control. Look it up. I’m just learning about it.
@KimberlyStamp
Ай бұрын
I have tried everything and the court is on his side . He has a attorney that has bullied me and they had me sign a stipulation to not return to the house and they was suppose to let me get my belongings and I have given them dates and they only want to give me a couple hours to pack my things . So I made a motion on the stipulation and recently went to court and the judge said the case was closed and didn’t know what was going on and why we was there and his attorney is telling me if I go through with the RFO he is going to get me for a 271 sanction and request the court put back the temporary restraining order and than permanent .
@KimberlyStamp
Ай бұрын
I have tried everything and the court is on his side . He has a attorney that has bullied me and they had me sign a stipulation to not return to the house and they was suppose to let me get my belongings and I have given them dates and they only want to give me a couple hours to pack my things . So I made a motion on the stipulation and recently went to court and the judge said the case was closed and didn’t know what was going on and why we was there and his attorney is telling me if I go through with the RFO he is going to get me for a 271 sanction and request the court put back the temporary restraining order and than permanent . My ex isn’t even living in the home and its just all my belongings in the house and the back yard is full of weeds and all over grown . I am living in Motorhome and its been very stressful all I been going through and my grandson is suffering over all this . I have ask for legal help and no one helps .
@KimberlyStamp
Ай бұрын
The court sucks
This 1st husband was an idiot, wifes earnings are low and wife will be the receiver.... too many mistakes to list.... He married too low... and paying for it, on the hook for a spousal support, child support and likely an unequal division of assets now.... Family law is shite