The worst thing about depression is feeling guilty for being depressed because you know you shouldn't be.

@supa4ys843

4 жыл бұрын

Kind of a wrong example you used there.

@tristan702

4 жыл бұрын

Supa 4ys I think what he means is some people that are depressed feel guilty because they know that so many more people out there have it worse, much worse and some of those people don’t even feel depressed and are living a decent life, so it’s like “why should I feel sad and hate my life when they are people that are happy and don’t have a life as well as mine.”

@shaymary5247

4 жыл бұрын

Or feeling or being judged bc ur "just so negative all the time". FTW then, if they have that attitude!

@shaymary5247

4 жыл бұрын

@@tristan702 EXACTLY.

@dcdude171

4 жыл бұрын

The worst thing about depression is watching it destroy your loved ones around you but not being able to do anything to change it.

The best description I've heard of depression: "Depression isn't when things go wrong and you feel terrible about it. It's when everything is going well, and you still feel terrible about it."

@GP-qb9hi

3 жыл бұрын

Sounds about normal.

@leahlune

3 жыл бұрын

Vital Smiles I’m so sorry for your loss. They say time heals all wounds, but I don’t think that is totally true. Time can lessen the intensity of the pain-although in my experience, sometimes the pain is super raw and fresh again. Is he usually there for everyone else, but not you? Is he mainly there for you, except on this anniversary? I’m just trying to understand if this is a more isolated/specific incident, or if he does this all the time-dismissing (aka invalidating) your needs and your pain? If it’s just on the anniversary, it’s probably his way of coping. But he’s your husband! If he can’t acknowledge your son’s death anniversary, he really needs to communicate that with you! Maybe you have before, but from what you’re saying-you need to reiterate that you need love and support. You need to feel that you and your pain are being seen and heard. His feelings are not more important than yours. You can and should feel free to express your feelings. And to expect that your husband will support you to the best of his ability. Even if that’s just listening to you. 💜

@eastorga0011

3 жыл бұрын

Yes I know the feeling 😔😢

@Wiggleattacks

3 жыл бұрын

H

@d.sepulveda7669

3 жыл бұрын

To me, it was both!

The worst thing about having depression is the fact that you have to try and be a "Different You" in front of loved ones so that they stay happy...while you just rot away slowly but steadily.

@True38

3 жыл бұрын

Not me. I don't give a shit about what anyone, whether their friends, colleagues or loved ones think. I'm not living my life for them, I'm living it for myself and anyone who tries to interfere or manipulate what I'm doing will be dealt with quickly and cut off entirely. You should live life on your OWN terms, not anybody else's terms. Otherwise, you'll never be happy. Life is a game and people only "care" if it's in their self-interest. To win the game of life you need to become the best possible player and learn to see through people's BS because no one is who they truly say they are. They all have a nice facade, but behind the facade, dangerous moves are being carefully planned out.

@donofdevilsaj

3 жыл бұрын

@@True38 But what about the ones who really do care for you. You can't just look away from them.

@Borescoped

3 жыл бұрын

Is it bad when you read the original comment and the first response, and feel like you bounce between both of them at different times, all the time?

@Sebullba

3 жыл бұрын

@@True38 So he should rot away?

@True38

3 жыл бұрын

@@Sebullba If that's what you took from what I wrote, then I suggest you just go away.

It’s so hard being a deeply feeling person in an incredibly unfeeling world.

@brentsaylor1725

3 жыл бұрын

Yes it is.

@everythingbelongstoallah71

3 жыл бұрын

This is exactly the words that I had in my mind. Thank you sister.

@jason4547

3 жыл бұрын

You're not a "deep feeling person" you're simply very self aware.

@stephengourley6390

2 жыл бұрын

Totally agree Emma.

@PeterParker-oz7fi

2 жыл бұрын

I read this like 10 times. Agree 100%

Depression is when ur body is alive but your soul don't wanna be inside it .

@slap_A_flamingo

4 жыл бұрын

Or nearly everything inside you is dying and the only thing you can feel is rage. A need to smash things up and get into fights. Just so you don't need to talk to anyone and you're not the only one who thinks you're an arse hole. Depression is a monster!

@sacr4450

4 жыл бұрын

richard kc You mean your body is alive while your soul is dead

@dragonjay7277

4 жыл бұрын

no its the other way around, depression is when your soul wants to get revealed but your mind tries to hide it.

@Tattitude241

4 жыл бұрын

I hate my body, I hate my soul, I hate waking up every damn day to the same fucked up shit. SSDD since childhood.

@vjrick

4 жыл бұрын

that is so true. i always feel like that.

Depression is when sleeping is the only thing you like, because you don't feel anything.

@craigime

4 жыл бұрын

cuz even the nightmares are better than reality

@JoseGonzalas

4 жыл бұрын

I can really relate to that. I often say I was somewhat peacefully existing, until I woke up

@kain6590

4 жыл бұрын

Only thing I look forward to anymore is sleep so I can dream and escape this shitty reality. Really just wish life would change or end. I'm happy with either

@erichargrove2287

4 жыл бұрын

Depression is when you don't want to go to sleep because you have those minutes before you fall asleep where you can't stay busy enough to keep your mind from thinking about all the negativity.

@TheBloodiac

4 жыл бұрын

Yes, sleep feels like temporarily death to me. And it's wonderful. Sometimes I have dreams that make me feel more alive than life.

Telling a depressed person to be happy is like telling a paralyzed person to stand up

@wickedweavile4612

Жыл бұрын

That shit doesn't help at all. People that don't deal with depression need to understand that

@clementine3836

Жыл бұрын

Exactly. My parents acts towards to me like this, like I have to be happy, try to happy. Whenever I tried, it never worked out, whenever I tried to tell them how I feel, they act negatively towards to me, so I stopped saying how I feel, I just keeping it to myself. Just like Chester said in the video. Almost everyday I feel like I hate everything, I am not happy with anything and I don't want anything.

@johnfal1849

Жыл бұрын

The depressed need hope. And that hope is in Christ. As cliché as it may sound in our post-Christian society, the truth remains true.

@Abridgimation

Жыл бұрын

Well said Tsuyu Asui from My Hero Academia

@darkreaper9205

8 ай бұрын

Definitely, or telling a homeless person to buy a house already

The worst part about depression for me is that even though people say you should get help and talk to people, when you do, they don't actually help anything. They feel sorry for you. They don't want to be around you, because you're depressed. They think you're going crazy. Talking to people actually makes it even worse. That creates even more loneliness, and it's just a part of the downward spiral.

@ioanmihaipopescu9071

Жыл бұрын

If you have the right people around is not a bad thing. My friends are the best told them about my mental status and they said they will do their best to make my life better. They said they are always there for me. So therefore I am feeling a little better when they say that. You just have to choose the right people to talk about your problems and know that they will never judge you for anything.

@beezybeez4207

Жыл бұрын

you must hear “ The Wave” or “Live Not Survive” by SLT 🤘🎧🔥. Whenever i get down it saves me !!!

@elainekiskis2001

8 ай бұрын

fact

@iguanasnipersfl

7 ай бұрын

Yup

@bartonamon

5 ай бұрын

This is the truth.

Unless you have been there, you have no f--ing idea how awful this mindset is.

@guybien4621

3 жыл бұрын

Yep. Most people don’t know what this shit’s like. It doesn’t help that the word “depression” gets thrown around too much and has lost a lot of meaning. Major depressive disorder is a much better term.

@sheogorath3584

3 жыл бұрын

Thank you

@danieljordan2285

3 жыл бұрын

Same with suicide. My mom attempted suicide when I was 18. I thought she was being a selfish bitch for doing that. Twenty years later I tried to commit suicide. After I was released from the hospital I apologized to my mom for judging her.

@glenmcl

3 жыл бұрын

Been there and I am still there. CB is right, much of it is caused by myself but I can't escape that f t world mindset and crawl into a corner to just sleep.

@peteferguson9261

3 жыл бұрын

@@glenmcl feel you. And it only gets worse with age in my opinion.

When he says “This place right here, the skull between my ears. That is a bad neighborhood”. I felt that so hard.

@marianamansour5936

5 жыл бұрын

Yes its so important to surround yourself with friends and family and stay for support stay occupied with positive things and isolation makes Deppression worse

@twitchistheman1991

5 жыл бұрын

Isolation hurts but also helps

@filipsimon2302

5 жыл бұрын

Feel you man

@agapeeternal

5 жыл бұрын

anthony correa my inner neighborhood is a fucking mess and I feel for you

@JayWolfKerbecs

5 жыл бұрын

Same, I can't even be by myself most of the f-ing time

Even when im around people that SHOULD know what depression is like, i still get pretty much the silent treatment.

@katiemccunniff9661

2 жыл бұрын

I'm so very sorry.

@natishawilson897

2 жыл бұрын

Idk you but I'm always here if you need someone to talk or vent to. I myself have had depression in my past so I know what your going through. Facebook me and ill add you if you want

@shelbywilkerson235

2 жыл бұрын

They kinda ignore you because they dont want to face it in my view!

@jamesirvine2579

2 жыл бұрын

The only person that can help is you

@froggo7215

2 жыл бұрын

Silent treatment is the worst thing. I know how you feel ❤ my heart goes to you

2017 was a dark year for rock. I didn't expect Chris Cornell to commit suicide due to depression. Chester certainly didn't keep his depression a secret but I was still shocked and heartbroken about his death. RIP CHRIS and CHESTER

@DylRicho

Жыл бұрын

Wow it's been so long already.

depression is like living in a body that fights to survive with a mind that wants to die

@scotdarwin7645

4 жыл бұрын

took d words outta ma mouth...

@TaunellE

4 жыл бұрын

It hurts..

@Julie-li2rh

4 жыл бұрын

Exactly! Then add some anxiety with that.

@EH-vp5ln

4 жыл бұрын

Very well said.

@Octane_Rampage_

4 жыл бұрын

Perfect quote!

A friend of mine said to me that depression is like a cold: you have it for a while, and then it gets better. I said 'No... it's more like arthritis: you always have it, but some days are less painful than others.'

@miskogwan9228

3 жыл бұрын

Definitely nailed it! I live through this daily anxiety/depression from the anxiety attacks there really isn’t very many good days. Just like Chester said when your alone with your own thoughts or inside your own mind it’s a bad place to be.

@Ice.muffin

3 жыл бұрын

Shit that is totally accurate

@buzzlightyearandco

3 жыл бұрын

For real, it's always there. Just ebbs and flows in intensity.

@MarshTheDarsh

3 жыл бұрын

right on

@tyfyh622

3 жыл бұрын

nice example

I dont think anyone wants to commit suicide, they just become hopeless and want that deep depression pain to go away.

@dragontamer9739

2 жыл бұрын

Me

@youneedcooling8107

2 жыл бұрын

Tbh depressed people like me want to live but don't wanna exist. Even if things are alright, they just don't seem right to me. Everyday we all are fighting in the hope that one day depression will go away😔

@gug8231

2 жыл бұрын

one day I will get over the fear of killing myself then I will be gone

@mommajordaan898

4 ай бұрын

I have bipolar disorder. I have tried explaining this to people so many times. Everything's that I've attempted suicide, it wasn't that I wanted to die, I just didn't want to go another second feeling the anguish I felt.

@duppelfeinherb

2 ай бұрын

that´s not right. Also as a non-depressed person you can commit suicide

He explained it perfectly. Living life is hard. Especially when your empathic and feel everything! You get overwhelmed!

@amazingnothingness

2 жыл бұрын

He was definitely an empath.

@crabsdicie

2 ай бұрын

Yes his Sun sign is in Pisces, he will definitely be sensitive and sense negative energies easily from his surroundings. It was the same with Kurt Cobain

Telling a depressed person to “be happy” is like telling an asthmatic person to “just breathe”

@sm-qw9mj

3 жыл бұрын

The irony is, that is the right advise. At least two problems arise from it though. - It is so easy to say those things that you can't help but feel anyone who says that doesn't actually give a fuck about you. - Portraying the end goal first does not actually mean anything, unless you know the path there.

@SteveVon7

3 жыл бұрын

Anyone who does that should get punched. There's actually a saying in the bible (which is true, religious or not) that says if you wake someone up early with the bashing of pans and screaming of cheers, that it will be accounted as a curse - not a blessing, the same can be said when a narcissist tries to portray themselves as false positive energy.

@OOBE9999

3 жыл бұрын

@@SteveVon7 Depends on the attitude and context that it is said in. If the person that said it actually cared about the person they said it too, it wouldn’t be so bad, or at least not too offensive. If it was said to imply mental weakness in another person, it would make a person upset. I don’t think anyone is showing weakness by feeling intense pain over life and wanting to commit suicide, but ultimately I see suicide as a selfish act. It depends on factors such as quality of life, too. People that commit suicide cause intense pain and emotional issues in the people they leave behind. When we find love within and show it to others, it is strong. But not stronger than people focused on pain. Pain is just something we all have to deal with hopefully as positively as possible.

@BreadCatMarcus

3 жыл бұрын

@frosty 4 u You're clearly a dumbass who cant speak from experience. If you don't know what you're talking about, don't speak.

@celioarcuri9216

3 жыл бұрын

If you're homeless..... Just buy a house

When you have clinical depression and ppl say "you're not alone" it's almost like a slap in the face, because that's exactly what it is. Regardless of how many ppl I'm around, or where I'm at, I'm always alone. It separates you from everything, there is is no "cheer up" "stop feeling sorry for yourself" "you'll be fine". It's not something you can control, it controls you.

@Werewolf914

5 жыл бұрын

Exactly

@Hexenkind1

5 жыл бұрын

You are not alone means, at least when I say it, that other people go through those struggles too. I would never be that ignorant to say it the way you just described.

@bobfalfa76

5 жыл бұрын

Hexenkind1 Well that's easy to say after someone describes it that way. When ppl say "you're not alone" they say it because A)That's what they think they're supposed to say or B)So they can feel good about themselves because they "helped" somebody. The only ppl who care or can somewhat help is ppl who suffer from this shit.

@Hexenkind1

5 жыл бұрын

@@bobfalfa76 I know all of this, but I said it anyway. Because I really mean it when I say it. Always.

@bobfalfa76

5 жыл бұрын

Hexenkind1 So do you suffer from it?

"Who cares if one more light goes out? Well I do." There is always someone that cares about you. Get well :)

@kishankeshari2240

2 жыл бұрын

No one cares

@rosieposie9564

2 жыл бұрын

That is not true, it might sound good and comforting but it simply is not true. Please know that there are people who really are alone and who actually have no one that cares about them.

@gorillula9650

2 жыл бұрын

Do you really cares? If a person from another side of the world died. The none famous one. It wouldnt effect you. Even if you got the news, it will just flew by. Life is harsh

@excalidusk9828

2 жыл бұрын

Nobody will care and I still think that even though I had therapy for 3 to 4 years it helped but I’m just thinking of life again and the stuff I hate and all the hatred

@gorillula9650

2 жыл бұрын

Personally i think you should just live life the way you enjoy it. As simple as that, even if it violates others.

Very few people take depression seriously even when it is happening to someone that lives in the same house, shares the same meals, goes out with you to take a cup of coffee. They often take it as a period of sadness that will go away. But sadness is only a symptom; when we are depressed we lose interest in almost everything. We can't take pleasure or happiness from anything. We can't find a way out to our problems We dislike everything about us. We feel we don't deserve to live. Everything hurts you. It's an open wound that hurts every day, every hour, every minute, every second of our existence. And we just want to stop the pain.

@me2846

3 жыл бұрын

thankyou for comment you understand i couldnt get words right!

@carolinaribeiro8480

3 жыл бұрын

@@me2846 Don't worry about that! I just wanted to share a little of what I felt when I was very sick with Depression. Thank you, Kim!

@me2846

3 жыл бұрын

@@carolinaribeiro8480 no ty :)

@DamonDu57KWAM

2 жыл бұрын

I know that. My brother didn't take it seriously, for him it's just a sad period. "You'll fell better in a few days". Few days ? It's here for 7 years. Almost 8.

@hereisgone775

2 жыл бұрын

A Wise man once said.. I tried so hard and got so far in the end its doesn't even matter.

He spoke about it publicly but nobody could help him... He was so alone.

@OriginalCouber

5 жыл бұрын

Well the sad part is, he wasn't alone. That's the fucking sad part.

@iian_

5 жыл бұрын

@@OriginalCouber Everyone is alone in this world.

@Howdy762

5 жыл бұрын

@@iian_ shut up thats not true at all

@iian_

5 жыл бұрын

@@Howdy762 anyone could die or turn on you without notice. If it hasn't happened to you, it will. Just as you will die and let your loved ones down.

@Howdy762

5 жыл бұрын

@@iian_ to me it seems like you're just broadening your statement to keep validity even though it's just depressing and exasperated.

Depression is when you close your eyes and wish that you don't open them tomorrow.

@sureshabi3104

4 жыл бұрын

I hv done tat many times

@rayray2528

4 жыл бұрын

That's exactly how I feel man.....I just wanna lie in bed and sleep and never wake up.

@kyrieeleison4990

4 жыл бұрын

I just want turn back the time 😭

@TootiLeaks

4 жыл бұрын

Yeah right... every day i sleep, i wish i never wake up

@jr5226

4 жыл бұрын

I know the feeling, but you gotta get up get the fuck up don’t let it defeat you. We’re here! Let’s go!

He's an artist. He felt too much. I will remember him as a happy guy as he was on Good Mythical Morning. Chester singing about food is life.

@KickingAssDaily

2 жыл бұрын

Food glorious food. Hot sausage and mustard. While we're in the mood, cold jelly and custard.

@jjberg83

Жыл бұрын

"He's an artist. He felt too much." DAMN. Some of the happiest people I know have the least self-awareness/intelligence. Which is dangerous to understand because it almost validates our depression. Like it's inevitable.

"Crawling in my skin, these wounds they will not heal" Damn it Chester. When he said "im just going to go lay over here and die" I felt that in my core. Ive been so blessed in life yet Ive always been so miserable. I try to take DMX's advice and find meaning in the suffering, but I just can't. If you tell people these things they say shit like "you'll get over it " or "just give it time" I dont want time, I want to be happy and alive. Why cant I be happy? Why do I allow myself to get to the depths of despair and self destruction? I honestly don't know what Im going to do, but one thing is for sure I WILL NOT STOP FIGHTING. THESE WOUNDS WILL HEAL.

I found out over the years that people always seem to be "shocked" and "sad" when someone commits suicide and they say things like "I wish she/he would have said something". The issue with that is that they HAVE said something, but non-depressed people don't want to listen because they feel like it's annoying or repetitive. And guess what, it is. Can you imagine living with it for decades? It is annoying and repetitive for the person who feels it, too! My advice, whenever someone opens up to you: don't tell them things like "it's going to be okay", "please seek help" "life is amazing", don't say that. Instead, JUST HUG THEM and listen, listen, listen! Again, and again and again and again and again.......

@michaelm.1947

3 жыл бұрын

"don't tell them things like "it's going to be okay"" Exactly. If something doesn't change, it certainly will *not* be ok.

@cjma482

3 жыл бұрын

Yes!!!❤️❤️❤️

@pinkmonkeybird2644

3 жыл бұрын

I respectfully disagree. I’ve never struggled with depression but several family members and one of my oldest and dearest friends do. Dark, crushing, bleak, and searingly painful, their depression is a hungry monster just waiting to take another chunk of their lives. I do listen, but sometimes it’s hard for me to understand why they are feeling a certain way, but I acknowledge they do. Yes, it is difficult for non-depressed people to hear the unspoken words abowsut another’s struggles, because we don’t always have a common language. It can be very hard to maintain a relationship when the other person constantly pushes you away. I keep trying because they are so worth keeping.

@silverhawkroman

3 жыл бұрын

@Marko Djurdjevic dunno man, I've met a couple of dudes who pretend they're depressed just for attention or edginess. One of them was talking about how shitty his (privileged) life was at my brother's friend's funeral. At some point I stood up and told him to shut the fuck up and he stayed quiet for the rest of the thing. Some people man, this is exactly why I hate humans so much

@silverhawkroman

3 жыл бұрын

@Julia Milford yeah there's tons of hiding because you know you don't want to bring everyone down. And then when you die they're all like "oh wow didn't know he was troubled, someone should've done something". Hindsight 20/20 baby

He’s the type of person to make sure your alright before he is

@rustyshackleford8307

5 жыл бұрын

That’s how a lot of depressed people feel I don’t care what happens to me but if I could make someone else feel better I would bend over backwards.

@yoe91

5 жыл бұрын

No, he isn't, not when he leaves a wife and multiple kids behind.

@charliecoke7396

5 жыл бұрын

@@yoe91 yeah killing yourself isn't good for your family but he made sure they wouldn't ever need anything else after he died. he wasn't being selfish he just couldn't take it anymore and felt horribly alone.

@nwordpassifyousub2303

5 жыл бұрын

yoe91 that’s literally the point if he didn’t care about his family and stuff he wouldn’t of done it he shoulda cared about himself and he woulda realized that he needed his family and stuff

@jasonyoung461

5 жыл бұрын

@@yoe91 it's not like he didn't make sure they where set for life before he died .

Had to do a double take when he spoke about envying sociopaths because they don't feel anything. I literally said the exact same thing to my therapist. It's scary to hear that same sentiment from his mouth, though I can tell he was in a much worse place at the time. RIP.

@Zezeguizee

2 жыл бұрын

I have been through severe anxiety for years and managed to get out of it not really knowing how. I experienced my 2 best years in 2019/2020 because I wasn’t feeling anything anymore. Everything was so quite. No worries, no anguish, no nothing. Now depressed since 6 month I would prefer to go back to that state of numbness. At least when you don’t feel you are not hurting !

@katanariza4508

11 ай бұрын

Same but i said it to my fiancé. And he had the same reaction as Chester's therapist. It is very scary to hear the same conversation from someone else.

At about 0:23 Mike’s face went from smiling like Chester was making a joke to “oh shit” in a matter of seconds. It’s haunting to watch now knowing what happened.

@TokyoBlue587

2 жыл бұрын

I feel so sad for Mike and the other guys in Linkin Park. I’m sure they all tried to help Chester, but they just couldn’t.

@griff2700

Жыл бұрын

yeah chester transitioned often from humor to realism when he was opening up in these interviews. mike was definitely aware about where he was going as he shared all of this

Depression is being in a room full of people and still being totally alone

@yvonneedwin77

4 жыл бұрын

Dawn Meek exactly I’ve never felt like anyone actually understands who I am and the hurt I feel

@vibodhj349

4 жыл бұрын

That is loneliness which is one of the causes of depression apparently.

@soundwaveproductivity2081

4 жыл бұрын

Nah that sounds like you have the wrong friends

@Shinrinnnn

4 жыл бұрын

Nf mansion would prefer

@alejandroaraiza4380

4 жыл бұрын

That's true !

"Depression is not killing yourself, depression is 'im gonna sit here and not eat and not talk to anybody' ".

@Zezeguizee

2 жыл бұрын

Depression is the first cause of suicide worldwide. So it can be killing yourself

@gug8231

2 жыл бұрын

one day I will get over the fear of killing myself then I will be gone

@gug8231

2 жыл бұрын

@@Zezeguizee one day I will get over the fear of killing myself then I will be gone

@KraveSanity

2 жыл бұрын

@@gug8231 stay strong buddy. I believe in you. Keep hanging In there

@davidhughmiller

2 жыл бұрын

I get that way from time to time because I am alone. And I’m so so sick of it I really don’t know how much more I can do it 😒

The worst thing about depression is that you can't express how you feel because everyone will only tell you are seeking for attention; your family will tell you have nothing to be depressed about. Sometimes I feel I'm too weak to be in this world, like I don't even know how I've made it until this day, honestly I am terrified about the future, because somehow I know my days are counted, there is almost no strength left inside me so, I'm just waiting for my day to come which is really sad because this is not how I imagined things would be many years ago.

@mariogarciagonzalez4692

2 жыл бұрын

Hey, Mariana GR. I understand you. Nobody imagines when we are young that life would be so hard. Everyone finds out that this is what we are condemned to be. Hope you are doing all right.

@L4Disillusion

Жыл бұрын

Keeping busy and helping others helps. Also find things you like. For me I enjoy games and music and work. If you can focus on the present and making good memories that's a start.

@RahulKumar-tp4zr

6 ай бұрын

All your words are now real to me....I don't know what to say ...hope god will give strength to me ....

@marianagr9475

6 ай бұрын

@@RahulKumar-tp4zr I truly hope you find something that helps you keep holding on my friend, we must stay strong as long as we can. Send you a hug.

@JohnieTheMan

3 ай бұрын

Hey Mariana. Hope you are doing fine? Sending you positive vibes! 🙏🏻🫶🏻❤️

That is EXACTLY how I feel, now I just gotta try explaining to my parents, they're always just like "Oh every teenager has depression." I always thought that, now I know it's something more.

If you end up here, you're probably not okay too...

@therose3173

4 жыл бұрын

Before reading your comment, i thought about it too "why am i end up here? Why from all the videos ?"

@jerbear4980

4 жыл бұрын

K own that for years

@dimosrix

4 жыл бұрын

Athena Lyttle its not about being ok, i think Most of the People Want to Understand it, thats all.

@BalboaBaggins

4 жыл бұрын

labeling depression as 'not okay' is why you're depressed in the first place. If you can accept all your feelings (anxiety, hopelessness, loneliness etc.) then you're doing all you can. A depression doesn't want to fight you, it just wants to be seen, but people keep running away from it. Stop running away from it.

@numbzinger350

4 жыл бұрын

Where's the sign-in sheet?

"Most of my problems are problems that I cause myself" Felt that

@SuperMisterKory

3 жыл бұрын

It's hard not to look back and think of how you could've done things differently and subsequently blame yourself - and this thought process only makes matters worse.

@andrewsawler875

3 жыл бұрын

I am living this right now. It is a vicious cycle. It has been a lifelong process to learn how to deal with it. I struggle everyday to explain this to those around me but it seems all for not. I want to be left alone often just so I don't negatively influence others like right now.... I have spent all day in my blacked out room watching youtube because it is easier than dealing with anyone around me.... I've tried many different medications with no real positive changes. At 40 I have been at this for about 20 years, my only light is that I have made it this far.

@dylanhitchcock6574

3 жыл бұрын

andrew sawler Jesus.

@dylanhitchcock6574

3 жыл бұрын

I’ve been feeling the same way for only around 2-3 years now, though it feels longer than that. This is my normal now, and I don’t really see a way out. I feel a little bad for feeling like this and for talking about it because I have a lot of people to talk to, it’s just that doing that never helps with anything.

@andrewsawler875

3 жыл бұрын

@@dylanhitchcock6574 One thing I have learned is most people just don't get why you cannot "shake it off", or "just be happy." Not to sound like an asshole but if it was that easy do you think I may just do that?!? Some days are better than others but honestly stop trying to explain yourself. Unless you've been through it 99.9% of normal happy people don't and will not understand. Take it one day at a time and focus on the good days and have a short memory for the bad ones. Dwelling will only drag it out. You owe it to YOURSELF to be the best you and accept that bad days will happen. Much love, and feel free to hit me up when you need too. Helps to have someone who has been there and gets it sometimes. Take care.

I feel this. I'm on medication and seeing a counsellor now, quit drinking, and I'm just barely treading water. Doing anything is still a struggle. I'm almost 40 now (elder millenial here) and it's brutal seeing where I feel like I should be able to be, but can't be. If you're like me, don't be ashamed to go on medication and seek professional help, because the shit does not get better on it's own. At least I've stopped it from getting worse.

@CiniMini69

Жыл бұрын

hey Chaz, how are you doing today?

@SarahMcDaniel-mv1ol

Жыл бұрын

Medicine dosent help ,sometimes it only makes you feel worse. I've spent lifetime in different hospitals and tried just about all the meds only to feel worse.

In 8 years of depression, this is the most accurate description of what I’m going through.

Depression makes you feel guilty about being depressed!

@riptarn

5 жыл бұрын

Aaron David absolutely true!

@ZunaZurugi

5 жыл бұрын

He is guilty of killing him self and leaving his kids behinds. So Praobably not that wrong.

@denisepleines6906

5 жыл бұрын

Know what is strange when I have a good day the next day is going to be an extra bad day. I'm not making this up. Or maybe it is my mind playing with me. I have to stop the negative thoughts like some one else said, ...it gets you no where fast

@undeadarachnid9614

5 жыл бұрын

Don't know any better explanation than yours ❤️ just knowing that someone else feels like I do helps..

@denisepleines6906

5 жыл бұрын

@@undeadarachnid9614 it is all we need some time s

I hate when somebody says “you’re not alone , I love you” and they have no clue who you are. That makes me angrier.

@russianmagpie7350

4 жыл бұрын

It's weird cos I genuinely just told some they can talk to me if they want and I honestly meant it but dunno if it sounds like how it does when someone says, "you're not alone, I love you" if u catch my drift.

@insopitus8503

4 жыл бұрын

What I really want, as depressed person, is true comfort and definitely not fake sympathy.

@maikatideibaskapanaumrqlatupa

4 жыл бұрын

yeah same. I hate those comments

@missf7727

4 жыл бұрын

ya it makes no sense. saying you're not alone while you're completely alone and I love you, when people only sneer or ignore you in real life. I'm not alone....sure.

@anthonyd4678

4 жыл бұрын

Facts, a bunch of cliched comments from strangers that you'll never meet.

As someone who suffered from depression pretty much all my life I just want to say the past 2 years have been incredible for me. I've never felt this happy. Just know there is hope!

"This in here, that's a bad neighborhood. I should not go walking in there alone." Oh boy THAT hits home. Hope he's at peace now.

-Thinking alot -Can't sleep at night -Hard to wake up -Dont feel to eat -Loss weight -Don't care about everything -Loss interest in everything -Doesn't want to go out -Easily get angry/sad -Blaming myself for everything What happened to me?

@Milan-mh4nc

4 жыл бұрын

I know how you feel man but try to go out at least 5 minutes per day, it will help.

@kevinboon4330

4 жыл бұрын

@@Milan-mh4nc I'll try thanks

@peaceduke1

4 жыл бұрын

@@kevinboon4330 -Thinking alot -Hard to wake up -Don't care about everything -Loss interest in everything -Doesn't want to go out -Easily get angry/sad -Blaming myself for everything + -Don't have will to do anything -tired all the time is here! you are not alone. Maybe I need more chemicals in my brain thats make people happy and active 😒 with hunger to earn more money or be respected in society.... but now, for 10 years, I don't have these feelings at all.

@user-pn1wt1cp7m

4 жыл бұрын

You are awesome man ! Dont give up

@mellowsoul9082

4 жыл бұрын

You're loved :) always. Remember that.

"I envy sociopaths because they don't have to worry about feeling shit."

@ruzicaakarose2605

5 жыл бұрын

Sarafina Bailor yes!! 💘 and 'I don't want to be human!'

@jvcdispatch6713

5 жыл бұрын

You are actually wrong in saying that...they do feel it...they do.

@nwilt7114

5 жыл бұрын

@@jvcdispatch6713 For themselves not others (lack empathy).

@MrKaidalen

5 жыл бұрын

@@MeatCatCheesyBlaster Have you seen the Paul brothers? LOL

@hakancevikel7368

5 жыл бұрын

even ted bundy had some feelings. he had an apparent remorse in his eyes in his final interview just before his execution.

Not only was Chester screaming to sing their songs, he was screaming for us, he was letting out our emotions, emotions that we can't let out, he was doing it for us.

As someone who has been depressed for years, it's been hitting extra hard the last few weeks for me. I'm not going to lie, and I don't talk about it, but I had a mental break like two weeks ago. I had just gotten out of work and sat in my car, and literally started crying. As someone who doesn't cry or ever show emotion really, it was just weird. It's been rough lately, my mind has been in a dark place. I know I need help but I don't want to get it. Maybe this is my calling who knows.

@me2846

3 жыл бұрын

i feel you! im the same way every F ing day of my life!!

@Borescoped

3 жыл бұрын

I didn’t know it for a very long time, but I believe I was fighting to keep war time PTSD shoved down in a bottle with my hand holding it tamped down. Explains why I’d get down right angry and mean and not give a shit about people. It took retiring from the military, and an old vet who had been fighting the same demons and was 100% PTSD to recognize in me what I couldn’t see for myself, since he had been to meetings with younger vets and heard/saw in them and what they were saying/expressing was everything I was relating to him. Since starting to seek treatment, I’ve been having those days where I just sit and cry. Fucking embarrassing, to go from what I was to what I am now. Hyper awareness, fight or flight, random eyeball leaking. Have to go sit in my car for hours before going home to my family and even then can’t stand to be around them, even my little one, when that demon come around for his pound of flesh. Hurts to just type this out right now, but I wanted you to know that even though I can’t understand exactly what you are going through, because I can’t be in your head, but I kind of get it, and many of us have our own version of this hell we plod through.

@ItzNick900

3 жыл бұрын

@@Borescoped You got a hell of an experience. I'll give you that. I can tell you right now, you've been through more than me, I don't have PTSD, so I can only imagine how hard that must be for you. My problem is really just finding a reason to keep going. Some people keep going because they have families, some because they actually like life, obviously there's many other reasons to keep going, and I'm sure I'm not the only one who doesn't see the point to say the least. Another thing is the mental battles, like I said I can only imagine how bad it is for you, but for me, it changes often, from just thinking I'm a worthless POS to just feeling super guilty that I feel worthless. When ever I think about ending it all, if I just keep thinking I'll break down and cry, like you said, super embarrassing, but I break down because all I feel is so much guilt for feeling that I'm not worth anything because I know I shouldn't feel that way. I say the main reason I'm still here is every time I think about it, just finally ending it, I think of the few people I talk to and how sad or disappointed they would be, because I care too much about what other people think about me. I know I should also seek help for my problems but, as I'm sure you know, it's just hard. Honestly I 100% appreciate you sharing your experience, I know it's hard to share. It must have been though to type, and if your like me, the hardest part was probably pressing the arrow button that posts the commet. Anyway, thank you for sharing, sometimes it's hard but it feels good from time to time so well, atleast I think it does, I hope it's similar for you.

@sethbriars2042

3 жыл бұрын

Same here and on top of it lost a years wages on a gambling relapse. I’m a problem gambler

@ThePress00

3 жыл бұрын

The first time I "overcame" depression (2017?), I was just dead inside. i wasnt wishing to be this or that anymore, but It's difficult to feel joy, or happiness, or be proud for a tiny achievement. It's never enough to "feel" something. I just can't. I simply can't get happy, or love my hobbies. It's literally being emotionally incapable of feeling something positive. Last year i had a breakdown because of many things piled up. And it hasn't gotten any better. I'm aware this is not right, like, i may need to talk to someone to express what's going on. But to be honest, i don't want to even get better. I don't even think about the future. And fuck knows that's what depression is, because i no longer care.

This guy was screaming at us for years that he was suicidal...we just weren't listening

@erics8524

4 жыл бұрын

Fatima Bonita wtf were we suppose to do? If you listen to his music you could tell he was but wtf are we suppose to do

@russianboi4669

4 жыл бұрын

@@erics8524 - Yeah. As much as I hate it, there was nothing we could have done

@bertsonder

4 жыл бұрын

Eric S well at least we can join him leaving this life

@jimmi8928

4 жыл бұрын

Bert Sonder that is deeply true

@jimmi8928

4 жыл бұрын

Caleb Huskey is he lying though ? Or are you one of those persons who’s afraid of death even to speak the subject

“...I kinda envied sociopaths cause they don’t feel anything...” That shit really hit home.

@dikkiexmakina7204

5 жыл бұрын

Same

@mixedmartialnutrition1746

5 жыл бұрын

Stupid statement tbh

@Radzig.Kobyla

5 жыл бұрын

A world without feelings is an uncontrollable state of boredom, it consumes you thats why sociopaths tend to end up as criminals, they are in a never ending search for stimulation.

@GlazzedDonut

5 жыл бұрын

Actually you'd be surprised you're left wondering if you're playing pretend the right way

@lisazoria2709

5 жыл бұрын

Actually, psychopaths are the ones who don't feel anything, sociopaths can't control their emotions.

Chester was such an incredible person. His music was my savior as a kid and I actually felt like it lost a friend when he died. A true loss

@beezybeez4207

Жыл бұрын

you must hear “ The Wave” or “Live Not Survive” by SLT 🤘🎧🔥. Whenever i get down it saves me !!!!!!!!!

@SVTJD

Жыл бұрын

@@beezybeez4207 I’ll give it a listen!

@beezybeez4207

Жыл бұрын

@@SVTJD 🤘🙏

I suddenly burst into tears. RIP chester. You’ll always be missed.

As a person who has suffered with depression since I was 8 years old I've always felt a bit better when I'm asleep because reality is a shitty place to be.

@kellymcphaul2793

3 жыл бұрын

I hear that. Totally hear that.

@austincasey8612

3 жыл бұрын

Yeah I feel like that too.

@austincasey8612

3 жыл бұрын

Yeah I feel like that too.

@justinsmith4562

3 жыл бұрын

8 years old lol

@nathanprather6006

3 жыл бұрын

Reality is a shitty place and sometimes life just absolutely sucks I feel alone all the time even though I know I’m not alone and I never feel like doing anything except sit in my room alone with my thoughts and as Chester said that’s a bad neighborhood for me to be walking alone in

As crazy as this sounds, him just talking about the reality of deep depression really does help. It shows us we're not alone.

@malefitz6886

3 жыл бұрын

It didn't help him, though.

@bulletproofair

3 жыл бұрын

Boo. Maybe it helped his family to know more. And to help others.

@AK-nd9io

2 жыл бұрын

So? How do other people in the world also being depressed helps you?

@user-mn8rr8rg8d

2 жыл бұрын

@@AK-nd9io it really helped to me in due time. The fact that other people can feel the same I do. 'Cause it's so much pain thinking I'm only one who has this wrong way, like everyone happy but I can't be.

@thedarkknight2424

Жыл бұрын

@@inaminute1826 I love that band but I prefer they're album phobia

Depression is a tunnel - not a cave with a blocked exit. No matter how dark it seems, eventually you *will* find your way out. Just don't give up.

@Achonas

3 жыл бұрын

the thing is, how long is that tunnel? when you walk that tunnel for years upon years, and never see a light, it might as well be a dead end cave. at least then you would know there was an end. in the tunnel, you can keep thinking the exit might be just a little farther, and every time it isn't it feels even worse.

@matthewstanley395

3 жыл бұрын

@@Achonas its like an illusion, with no exit just a fake light that keeps you constantly searching

@PAULSWorld131

3 жыл бұрын

yeah, eventually we die, that's the only way out.

Thats about as perfect description of real depression as you can get. Nothing can just cheer you up or take you out of it. People that have never had it don't understand and can get frustrated thinking they have solutions.

Saddest thing of depression is it's almost impossible to actually express it. Nothing will ever do it justice.

@karmen8873

3 жыл бұрын

And because of that no one really understands you. Just the ones experiencing the same feelings once in ther life.

@JasonLeBel

3 жыл бұрын

@Anime/Rock&Metalfan Knowing that you're going through it, is a big step. At least now you know that you should talk to someone. Some people don't realize that they are depressed until it's too late. For some, it's slow and gradual where you don't notice it.

@jamesirvine2579

3 жыл бұрын

@Anime/Rock&Metalfan the worst thing you can do is sit about go for a walk do some excercise keep you're mind active mate,I suffer from it unfortunately for me Its self inflicted through using cocaine

@Jojosiwo

3 жыл бұрын

People should not tell ''friends ''about their depression,because deep inside they dont care.... It sounds mean-but is reality.. -nobody cares about personal problems of others ..I tried to talk to one ''friends'' when I was depressed they even left me on read..... Sometimes the people who would care the most are family💗...🥴

@jaimzblonde07streetavenger42

3 жыл бұрын

Like a big black cloud n all you feel is pain n life n living doesn’t make sense took me 18 years to get over a major depression I still have some bad days...I bought a little dog n he’s helped me feel love again

Who else got recommended this while feeling depressed. The KZread algorithm is better at recognizing how I’m feeling than myself.

@shinyagami8843

3 жыл бұрын

Well that’s kind of relevant... considering how many people in the world are depressed at some degree To me it’s surprising I didn’t get this in my recommendations earlier For you it seems it’s something fleeting so that’s why it was a strange thing to happen for me that’s everyday for the last 10 years...

@victorparedes6044

3 жыл бұрын

You should definitely have a talk with whoever you know that really cares about you, do not wonder if it will go well, do not tell yourself that there is no point, just do it. Find a close family member or friend, just be honest and share with them your struggle, just to let them know what you are going through, you will be surprised how much they care. Understand that your experience inside your mind, is not stronger than the comfort you can have from someone else in the real world. Have faith, reach out to someone you know that really cares, even if you doubt, even if you've done it before, just choose to believe that you are working on a turnaround. The awful neighborhood that is inside of your head, is an illusion and you know it, when you choose to listen to a caring person over your negative mind, you will find peace. Once you have a real moment with someone who loves you as a person, life is not a burden anymore, it becomes a blessing.

@zachsawyer4822

3 жыл бұрын

U shouldnt be okay with tht. Thats sketchy destroy ur fone now

@victorparedes6044

3 жыл бұрын

@@zachsawyer4822 Not destroy the phone, just adjust the settings, turn off "report diagnostic data", "search recommendations", and "search history", that will give you less intrusive results and recommendations.

@yxyz8150

3 жыл бұрын

They see your searching patern each world your typing changing behaviour , and conclude that you need this kind of video.

I still can’t believe he’s gone.. His music helped me through elementary, middle school , and high school . And now it’s helping me through work. My heart hurts so much that he fully described depression and nailed it too well.. I will continue listening and keep my hands held high.

The saddest part is people like him put on a facade of happiness to others so they don't feel the same. So to others you seem perfectly fine but inside. Inside you are struggling to find a reason to go on.

He's alive in our headphones. In our skull between our ears. Whats sad is that he's gone in reality when we take headphones off 😣

@finethehuman1821

5 жыл бұрын

He's not gone. Never say that

@alienbob5690

5 жыл бұрын

He lives in our hearts. He helped so many people. The sad, the lonely, the depressed and the lost...he touched each of us. Long live Chester Bennington's soul in his music. You say he lost his fight, but his demons are gone. I hope you find peace my brother.

@thomasbrown1638

5 жыл бұрын

Damn man it's 10am here and I don't need these hard feels bro

@shirleyware9059

5 жыл бұрын

He will forever live deep in our hearts and souls!!!!

@eminemdissedmefornoreason8358

5 жыл бұрын

@@alienbob5690 true

Rest In Peace Brother "We all die. The goal isn’t to live forever, the goal is to create something that will." - Chuck Palahniuk

@etol417

4 жыл бұрын

👏👏👏

@lindahandley5267

4 жыл бұрын

@Oskar, and Chester did create and leave something that will live forever...his music.

@beyzaoruc4683

4 жыл бұрын

@@lindahandley5267 yeah but we wish he could be alive and create more

@lindahandley5267

4 жыл бұрын

@@beyzaoruc4683 well of course we do

@davidstx101

4 жыл бұрын

And he achieved that. Rest In Peace Chester 💜🖤💪

The way he describes just crawling into a corner and doing literally nothing... I get it. I really get it.

Had a depressive episode last year ,it was a combination of family divorce problems, grandma and parrots death, SA, bullying etc. went out of it. Doing much better these days. It gets better! I know it may seem hard to believe , but every time i went to therapy it got a bit better and when i found a support system ( my family and some friends) i started to feel better. Its not like a switch. Its a slow , tumultuous path . But i kinda feel happy sometimes and i used to just feel numb and hopeless . Life is starting to feel brighter. Sometimes i go outside and listen to the birds sing. Even when i have the occasionnal panic attack or suicudal thought , i know its temporary and that there are people who would care if i d13d.

"I just don't wanna feel anything" Damn I felt that

@smailzlayji5573

4 жыл бұрын

I Can help if you need me just Ask and i'll be there for you anytime

@mery9127

4 жыл бұрын

😔

@ZachAttackO0

4 жыл бұрын

On a hole other level i left that for reals

@jaulloa21

4 жыл бұрын

Meditate then

@TaunellE

4 жыл бұрын

Me too...

Linkin Park honestly has helped me so much with my depression. Just hearing Chester's vocals and their lyrics just brings so much light into my life. I am forever grateful for Chester and Linkin Park for getting me through every day. He said it best "The skull between my ears is a bad neighborhood."

@trishankidutta5643

2 жыл бұрын

But the one who helped in healing nothing could have been done to save him.

@jennadionisio

2 жыл бұрын

One of the earliest times in my life that I got sad and moved out of my childhood house, I blasted Hybrid Theory in my empty bedroom and suddenly felt better

@ElenaYoshimoto

2 жыл бұрын

❤️

@kyleharris5462

2 жыл бұрын

"Againt my will i stand beside my own reflection" 😔 that line hit me hard

@nszymanski211990

2 жыл бұрын

Listening to his voice still helps me to some extent to this day and I'm now 31. He/linkin park was my favorite growing up and without him here it's hard and can only listen to his old songs and take me to that happy place

This is the truth, why do everyone fly away from this. He is so fucking honest

Depression has fucked me up over time as well as several others. I hope everyone out there is doing well.

1:07 "... I just don't want to feel anything..." Holy cow. That's it.

@hostilewerewolf405

3 жыл бұрын

and nobody paid much attention to it, that’s the sad part. it’s like what he was saying, he was just saying and that’s it. it’s heartbreaking that nobody tried helping him.

@CraigKostelecky

3 жыл бұрын

Ghost Weylyn Lupine I’d say a *lot* of people did listen to him, but I had hoped that his art gave him enough of an outlet to release those emotions and would be able to keep going on. Anyone who’s really listened to his lyrics, even if he didn’t write that particular song, can just feel the real emotions he put into it. I knew it was coming from a real place and there was a constant internal struggle. I hoped that a combination of performing and standard therapy (which he admitted to attending) was going to be enough to keep him from taking his life. I often wonder if he would have ever taken that step had Chris Cornell not done it first.

@hostilewerewolf405

3 жыл бұрын

Craig Kostelecky well, yes, you’ve got a point. i do see how he’s had enough of an outlet. although, sometimes, your only outlet just isn’t enough to keep you mentally going. so i deeply hurt for him, but at the same time i understand. he had the chance for his therapy, but unfortunately the worst gets the best of us.

“I envy sociopaths because they don’t have to feel anything.” Most people don’t realize how real that feeling is. Sometimes I wish I were a completely self-centered person so I wouldn’t constantly be worrying about other people’s needs at my own expense. I don’t mean to humble myself, but being an empathetic person can be so painful sometimes.

@vyonemesis3804

4 жыл бұрын

So true

@Ssjcloud3

4 жыл бұрын

the pain of compassion, the constant expectation and worrying passion, sometimes I just don't want to care so I don't feel the guilt, the other side of it. Like being sensitive, you feel the good more but the bad too yet it's worth it. I think that to feel outweighs no feeling like life to death but sometimes that's the desired seemingly cure.

@excho

4 жыл бұрын

Well, I don't feel much and I'm still depressed and anxious as fuck. It really wouldn't help you at much as you think. You'd just have different problems, a different kind of depression, that's all.

@AprilA15

4 жыл бұрын

Sociopaths do feel they can feel love they can feel angry sad but it’s different

@fishndad4355

4 жыл бұрын

Shut the fuck up

The worst thing about depression is being constantly at war with yourself, it's like Shakespear part of you wants to be here, and the other part doesn't want to be here. Fucking constant tug of war. Just living throughout the year is an achievement. Congratulations.

He said this perfectly. Most us with cptsd & trauma from childhood brings us to our knees

@beezybeez4207

Жыл бұрын

you must hear “ The Wave” or “Live Not Survive” by SLT 🤘🎧🔥. Whenever i get down it saves me !!!!!!!!!

Depression is like drowning, but everyone else around is breathing just fine.

If you’re reading this. I’m sending you guys so much love ❤️ I’m here to listen 👂🏼

@imximi5005

5 жыл бұрын

Thank you

@denisepleines6906

5 жыл бұрын

@@HopelessDestiny91 I have been unemployed for 9 months now. I'm so scared no one will ever hire me. ..I was terminated from what I believe my medication and mental disorders I just couldn't deal with being there any more so I wasn't too upset at the time but now I really regret it. I was there for 15 years. I am a quivering mess at job interviews. I have not been looking for a while I had to take a break it was giving me mad anxiety. I is hard to hold a job in this state of mind, I have to start looking again next month. I have always been depressed and anxious but was able to work don't know what happened. No I do know. it's like I had a melt down.. all of a sudden every thing went to shit. Whew l I am a loner but sometimes I wish I had some one to talk to. Some one who truly cares and doesn't judge or think I am just feeling sorry for my self even though I do have pity parties a lot. Whew. At least I can sleep THANK GOD. it is important to get enough sleep and I have crazy colorful wild dreams probably from the seroquel I have to take for insomnia. It's my sweet escape then in the morning I go uuuuggghh. I have been having some thoughts of suicide lately but I just can't do that to my kids and sister and neice. We are all we have. Both parents died with in 3 years of each other and my sister's baby father died in a freak accident. Was a horrible 3 years. Then last year my youngest was diagnosed with bipolar disorder which is a absolutely devastating! !. .out of the blue one day she slashed her leg to ribbons and threatened to kill herself by swallowing her bottlres of UNUSED medication Zyprexa ..almost right after I got out of the hospital from a spinal fusion. The cops came and handcuffed her and took her to this awful place almost like a prison and wouldn't let her come home until she took lithium for 4 days. And i was in so much pain from surgrey it was really bad. Sorry that is fuck ed up she didn't stay on the lithium, gawd it's a funky med. I better stop now. I have no one to talk to so I could sit here all night and realized that I just hijacked the other posts by writing a novel. Thank you to anyone who actually read all of this it's A LOT

@HumanDrillBit

5 жыл бұрын

Strange how fate works. I'm depressed and have struggled to understand what the fuck is going on with me. By random luck, I stumbled upon this video. Chester Bennington's words on this topic are spot on. His explanation is on target to what I and many feel while trapped in a deep depression. I don't have the courage to do what Chris did to escape this madness, and I suppose that's the purgatory I must endure. Thanks for this video, and God bless you.

@denisepleines6906

5 жыл бұрын

@Mafaman I thank you so much for that and I needed to hear that you care about my problems. I may have to take you up on your offer, I am waiting for the husband to come home and scream at me again, last night was enough. .long story short I don't know how to do anything for the umpteen time. Anyway you are a doll. And I will be here for you too if you want

@Bloggsjoe81

5 жыл бұрын

Denise Pleines I feel your pain too. I have the most debilitating depression, anxiety and OCD. I know how hard it is struggling through each day. My girlfriend who I was living with for two years left me 3 months ago and now I have no one. She was my soul mate and I miss her terribly. I don’t go out anywhere apart from work and I’m pretty much a recluse. I had a life with her but now I have nothing. No purpose for living. I think about suicide everyday as I just want this mental anguish to stop. It feels like a thousand nails all piercing my head at once. I’m 38 years old and given up on ever being happy. I just want peace.

“This place right here, this place between my ears, that is a bad neighborhood” yeah, same. Very well put.

"there's no sunshine" FOR REAL. It's like the whole world and everything you loved and everything INSIDE you has lost it's colour and turned a horrible grey. you just feel empty and lost in your own head. nothing is fun anymore and i mean nothing

Unless you have depression, you will never know how this feels. The best way I can describe it is... you want to run away, but not just from everyone around you, but from yourself too. I sympathize so much, I know how you felt. My prayers and thoughts are with his family and friends 💕

@gug8231

2 жыл бұрын

one day I will get over the fear of killing myself then I will be gone

@mariaroxx

2 жыл бұрын

in my case you especially want to run away from yourself because that's where the true abyss is

Depression is pure hell. I have depression on top of anxiety. It's a constant battle everyday and I feel like it's not getting any better. I wish I couldn't feel anything anymore. 💔

@kimjong-un1848

4 жыл бұрын

Try to get enough vitamins. maybe a vitamin and mineral comlex, vitamin b12, b6, biotin, magnesium,vitamin c, folic acid. helped me instant

@saatviksingh727

4 жыл бұрын

Metal helps out tho

@johnmorrell9468

4 жыл бұрын

That's me also

It has been 26 years of clinical depression for me and I am only 37. It as hard as hell living like this. Sometimes I feel like giving up. All my hopes and dreams seems to be shattered. I am still contribute to society, but I could be so much more. It all started when my mother get clinical depression, because of abuse at work. I was in shock and hurt me so bad it pushed me to get depression as well. On top of that I was verbally abused at school after they could not physically dominate me. I was at a Psychiatrist at the age of 11. The same Dr. that diagnosed my mother and he missed the signs. The problem is if clinical depression is not treated fast enough the damage is irreparable. You have to be on medication for the rest of your life and you and even then you will still struggle at times.

As someone who has battled depression amongst other mental health issues - i can tell you in the midst of it, when the beast roars the loudest, it's the scariest F**** thing you can experience. You lose control, everything is dark, scary, confidence in yourself and the world goes - you just want to die. As ive heard someone else say - when you break your arm everyone wants to sign the cast, when your mind breaks - most run away.

It's hard when people that have never been depressed say, "Call me!" or "Just be happy." That's not how it works. When it gets dark, that's where it's about too late.

@RyTheUnDefined

3 жыл бұрын

I think what most people who haven't been through it personally fail to grasp is that when you're in those (often painfully long) moments, it's really, REALLY hard to call someone, or reach out, or to feel like you're worth someone else's time. Not their fault, I do deeply appreciate the sentiment, but like, it can be really hard to seek help when you need it most. Today I would've laid in bed all day dreading my existence if I hadn't gotten a text from my friend finally at like 4pm. Sometimes you just really need someone else to go the extra mile to reach out to you....and that's the hardest part is that you never know when it's gonna happen, and when it does, it's hard to let someone know, and harder still for that to be the right person in that moment. It makes me think a lot about AA and NA groups, how people build networks in those groups for mutual support, and someone you know, like your sponsor for example, will sometimes go outta their way to check up on you. I've never been to AA or NA cuz I never felt I needed it really, but I feel like we need something similar for people struggling with depression. That would be so powerful to have a handful of people who you know you can hit up for support any time, because they're there for you and you're there for them. We need mutual support communities for people with depression.

@michaelm.1947

3 жыл бұрын

@@RyTheUnDefined I'm glad you got that text message and were able to get up today. One day at a time! And I agree that groups/communities for depression would be helpful.

@victorparedes6044

3 жыл бұрын

You should definitely have a talk with whoever you know that really cares about you, do not wonder if it will go well, do not tell yourself that there is no point, just do it. Find a close family member or friend, just be honest and share with them your struggle, just to let them know what you are going through, you will be surprised how much they care. Understand that your experience inside your mind, is not stronger than the comfort you can have from someone else in the real world. Have faith, reach out to someone you know that really cares, even if you doubt, even if you've done it before, just choose to believe that you are working on a turnaround. The awful neighborhood that is inside of your head, is an illusion and you know it, when you choose to listen to a caring person over your negative mind, you will find peace. Once you have a real moment with someone who loves you as a person, life is not a burden anymore, it becomes a blessing.

@victorparedes6044

3 жыл бұрын

@Some Random Guy I agree that not everyone is given the same family situation or social environment, but that doesn't mean that it's out of your control. You are the one who keeps or discards someone from your life until they die or leave you, and you are the one who can go out into the world and find new people. You might not like the people you know online right now, but make no mistake the internet connects you to the entire world almost, and you can find more understanding people then can even be met in a lifetime. I mean just look at this comment section, all these people with similar experiences in depression are connecting and interacting to this day. You absolutely have innumerable friends you haven't met yet out there if you look for them. You can even find locals, in your community and meet in person. If all you have is fake friends, forget about them, find new ones, and stay close to your family, hug and pull them tight, show them all your appreciation, and treat them with your very best. I understand how much loss and emptiness you must feel without your wife, but the Love of friends and family is all you need to make life worth living I promise.

@codeP08

3 жыл бұрын

I get it that these people think they want to help, but they are unaware of what that would mean. I can't call the same person over and over again, every single day just to bitch about how shitty everything is. They wouldn't be able to handle it and it would bring them down and it would be awkward for them. And for me too. I'd feel stupid and would start hating myself for dumping all my misery on somebody who otherwise is alright, or at least is not fucked up like I am. Also, in that interview where he's sitting on that couch with Mike, you can see how Mike laughs after Chester says the heaviest things. I'm not saying this to throw shade on Mike, i'm just trying to point out, how those who are not struggling either have no idea how serious this is, or they do, they just feel awkward and don't know how to react when something so heavy is brought up and are uncomfortable in the situation and can't help reacting in an awkward way.

Damn, he was talking about his depression all this time during interviews and everyone wondered what happened. Damn...

@geraldfilkins9425

4 жыл бұрын

When someone talks about their depression, it's a cry for help...

@psychee1

4 жыл бұрын

@@geraldfilkins9425 For real, even talking about it takes effort and clinical depression (which I'm struggling with) is a horrible, unenviable beast that just sucks the life clean out of you. It's aggressive apathy in its rawest, most horrible form and it Will kill you, unless you beat it. Sometimes beating it's not even an option either because the damn thing can bounce back at any moment. The best most of us can do is keep it contained, stave it off with sticks and stones and everything that works. It's Really easy to turn to alcohol or drugs too, to get away from it and even easier when you genuinely don't care anymore. When it literally doesn't matter to you whether you live or die. My heart goes out to anyone else unfortunate enough to be dealing with this shit. But on a slightly more positive note, it's possible to win. You can work through it, contain it, manage it and see that sunshine through again.

@omarsyed7345

4 жыл бұрын

@@janiraannette4417 are you okay

@corty1975

4 жыл бұрын

Have been listening to a lot of LP recently after a few years off. The messages and references to suicide and depression can be found in almost every song. And people wonder what happened

@BellalovesMarla1

4 жыл бұрын

No one will believe you until you're dead and then everyone's crying and asking themselves what they could have done

I felt what depression was like since my Grandpa passed in 2008 of Leukemia. I've gotten stronger after his passing, but there are days where I don't want to be around anyone or do anything. But I do what I cantonot let it show cause tbh, I don't like showing or telling anyone, including my parents how I feel most of the time. I just keep them buried inside alot so I don't burden people with my issues.

I live that shit every moment. LP's music has helped me through some of the darkest times by giving me something to play that I can relate to. Rest in peace knowing your songs had and will continue to have an impact for years to come.

@Laura-we6xi

2 жыл бұрын

PERSONALLY this was the problem to me.I related too much with negativity and negativity dragged me down! Sad music can give us RELEASE but not happier feelings.We shoudnt consume it constantly.WE NEED TO BE AWARE about the content we consume because it becomes our worldview and thoughts.SAD SONGS cant give us happy feelings.Down the road we IDENTIFY ourselves with DEPRESSION and negativity cuz its all we know and have inside.It just feels common so we consume more and more sad content VIA sad music,sad videos,negative youtubers etc EVERYTHING WE HEAR ARE IDEAS! and ideas becomes OUR BELIEFS and the more sad we feel and we wonder: why? RIGHT NOW am I questioning myself.WTF am I doing here if Im depressive?This is the worst place A DEPRESSIVE PERSON SHOULD BE.How much SADNESS we put into ourselves just by filling our minds with negavity and sorrow?Its not about being delusional and hiper positive but its about realizing that we are feeding our minds with sadness and hopelesness and if our minds are full of this content theres no space for happiness or positivity at all because the content we toss it into our minds have became our NEGATIVE WORLDVIEW.My PSYCHOLOGIST told me we shoudnt run and its good to feel the feelings but for how long?How much time we are spending dating sadness?

@michaelr7506

2 жыл бұрын

@@Laura-we6xi honestly it is the exact opposite for me. If I'm struggling with a bad day, I throw on some angry, depressed music for an hour, get it out of my system and I feel better. We all have our triggers and coping mechanisms. Linkin Park's music has been something that helps me. But as someone who struggles with mental health like I do, feel free to DM me if you ever need an ear to listen. Best wishes.

@Laura-we6xi

2 жыл бұрын

@@michaelr7506 Yeah for sure.Only you know what's best for you:) personally I'm starving sources of drama and sadness I share my comment cuz I think its worth to think.It took me years to notice this pattern of picking sad things.Months ago I listened to "when the party it's over" from billy Elish and I saw so many depressed teens there.They all have the same pattern.They dont talk to their parents about their pain,they keep identifying themselves with other sad people and they get deeper and deeper into their depression..When I think about my myself as a teen I think "omg there was nothing ever wrong with me" but I was getting worse identifying myself with that darkness.In your case you say you listen,release and let go but a lot of people get stuck on that place and it only gets worse.

@Laura-we6xi

2 жыл бұрын

@@michaelr7506Im feeling fine TODAY thank God but thank you so much for your offer of help 💗

@michaelr7506

2 жыл бұрын

@@Laura-we6xi I do work full time, so I may be a bit slow at replies. But I'm always up for making new friends and if I can help someone through a bad day, all the better. And yes, a lot of young ppl keep things in. To me that has less to do with media they consume and more to do with not wanting to feel weak in front of those charged with protecting you. It's why music has historically had a theme of rebellion against the previous generation. Glad to hear you are having a good day tho. Thanks for the replies. As much as I despise social media, little interactions like this hammer home the "social" aspect of it. Enjoy the rest of your evening

Chester was an enigma of a person. When I hugged him I felt EVERYTHING!!! He was the only celebrity death that actually made me break down and cry. Because when I met him, he appreciated me. I wasn’t just another fan. I mattered. And that’s special

@federicozucchero6770

3 жыл бұрын

Did he tell you something?

@beatrizamorim6873

3 жыл бұрын

@@federicozucchero6770 I'd like to know it too

@federicozucchero6770

3 жыл бұрын

Beatriz Amorim Yes, it would be interesting. I’m not a fan of him, actually. But listening to some of his interviews, I understood he was an incredibly interesting person.

@johnjesusiskingofkings1770

3 жыл бұрын

@@federicozucchero6770 Yes.... And just finding out today that he was John Podesta's son, adds a whole new level of understanding to his pain and torment... Among other things to think about.

@mstoyanova92

3 жыл бұрын

@@johnjesusiskingofkings1770 he was not. This is fake news.

It took me 12 years to cure my depression and for almost 2 years I was happy then it came back again.... truly a silent killer

@patrickrussell6558

4 жыл бұрын

How did you "cure" it?

@alin_943

4 жыл бұрын

When you earn something, you lose something else, even if you don't decide

@katjaxxx7353

4 жыл бұрын

yep. I had 7 years in-between.

@beegeezee505

4 жыл бұрын

I'm just coming out of a cycle. I've noticed that it comes in phases. You can be perfectly normal for years and then one day while doing something completely thoughtless and routine, it sneaks up on you and sucker punches you. There's no escape. The only way out is through. You have to let it wash over you and try not to let it do too much damage before it passes. Getting sunshine. Stay moving even when it hurts and it's the last thing you want to do. Keep repeating to yourself that it will pass.

@karlmarx1868

4 жыл бұрын

@@patrickrussell6558 I did extreme self reflection for about 4 months in isolation at sea

The way Mike looks while he listens to him and reflects on each of his friend’s word....hits hard. Man, must have been the hardest for him to have his pal die.

I keep sharing this video to people because it explains how i feel so perfectly and the responses I get…. They just make me want to stop trying. “Do something that makes you happy”? Nothing does anymore. “Take care of yourself”? I dont care about myself. When he says he is fine when he gets out of his own head and can help other people… I feel that but no one wants to ask for help from someone they think can’t help themselves

Depression is like quicksand...the more you struggle and try to get away the quicker it consumes you. My love to all those who need it cause I know how it feels.

@b.l7491

3 жыл бұрын

@Intelligent Redditor I'm pretty sure they meant that the more you try to overcome it, the further you get away, it comes back and drags your under deeper than you were before

Everyone in this comment section is like a comrade to me. They feel the same shit as I do and understand what it's like.

@ujjawaltiwari6668

3 жыл бұрын

😭

@METALFAN4EVS

3 жыл бұрын

I hear ya, man..

@neneflyn2137

3 жыл бұрын

Learn vipassana it'll help you👌

@catherinedubrovna7756

3 жыл бұрын

I am your comrade.

@daveo7481

3 жыл бұрын

Hi friend. I don't SUFFER from depression but trust me I'v been there. It's mental and physical. My grandma told me long ago to always shower and put on clean clothes and do at least one thing every day, even if that is ALL you can do. For me, listening to music while walking helps short term and long term. But if you can't get out of bed or eat or drink, try to remember that you are loved and please don't leave us alone with a heart and mind as broken, because you will take a piece of us when you go.

Will always love you Chester. ❤️❤️❤️ Depression is living in a world of color and you only see gray, it’s watching everyone around you breather and live while you’re drowning right in front of them.

This is exactly me at this very moment. Thinking what was even my purpose here on Earth. To have multiple mental health issues and psychical health issues. No support from anyone on my family. My friends. I'm socially awkward and spend most of my life at home doing nothing. I don't work. I have been called a loser so many times in my life that by people who I trusted that I just feel like maybe they are right. All the people I have loved and loved me are dead. I'm just here until I'm not anymore.

@ExileLBL

Жыл бұрын

lets figure this out. What does all depressed people in this discussion have in common? :)

0:46 "Nothing makes me happy". I completely agree with that sentiment wholeheartedly, sadly.

@philavon1358

5 жыл бұрын

Hey man, life's beautiful. You like ice cream?

@car_tag

5 жыл бұрын

For what it can be worth coming from an internet stranger, I'm proud of you for getting up today. I'm proud of you for battling your brain. Remember that depression lies.

@brightestlight9462

5 жыл бұрын

what about their music?

@gmcleod5639

5 жыл бұрын

@@car_tag I appreciate both your response, as well as your empathy. Unfortunately though, biology dictates that after going to sleep, once the sun rises, you have to get up and do it all again until it's time for bed once again.

@philavon1358

5 жыл бұрын

@@gmcleod5639 i know everything about that. But in 2016 i decided my body didnt have the power over my mind. I cant even believe where i'm at right now. Never thought i had this power in me. I worked for 4 years and i could retire tomorrow and be well happy with the rest of my life. Im 24. Keep at it man. Physical exercise helps a LOT . i found help in cannabis oil also. Changed my life! Praying for you man, hope you do well!

I sometimes like to be alone but I hate feeling lonely ...

@silverhawkroman

3 жыл бұрын

A vast majority of people NEED their private time, I don't get whre the fuck we took this strange idea that we HAVE to be in contact forever. We're social species but everything in moderation FFS. I can't relate with the loneliness tho, I'm schizoid and I've never missed anyone in my life

@TheCherylish1

3 жыл бұрын

Me too I'm a friendly introvert

@sascotttx5145

3 жыл бұрын

@@silverhawkroman You say you can't relate with the loneliness. Can you relate with solitude? Both words are about being alone, but only one of them celebrates it.

@johantitulaer1052

3 жыл бұрын

When I was seriously depressed. I asked my parents if I could put my mattress in their room and sleep there. If I would sleep on my own I would feel so alone that I'd crumble. I hope to be that guy to be there for people who don't want to admit they hate being alone but don't want to bother others. Some people can't admit it.

@TheCherylish1

3 жыл бұрын

@@johantitulaer1052 I get that for some reason the nighttime intensifies how alone a person can feel I don't know if the darkness or lack of sunshine has something to do with it or not I somehow think social media has put way more people in the loneliness field than ever before because it's a false sense of connection

I felt the need to comment on this-out of all the famous ppl ive heard talk openly about depression chester bennington is the one I actually could truly relate to-I found myself in a state one night the other day and just started playing and singing numb on my guitar and idk what it was but I just felt every word and this feeling took over me-like I was tuned into my soul or something cuz I just felt it organically so hard-then I started listening to more of his songs and came across a few that I could entirely relate to and actually felt like I was not alone and started to understand myself a little bit more from it-like I was a little less lost-one love to everyone fighting this fucked up battle and r.i.p to not just a legend but a beautiful human being

@juanahaydeespinoza5702

3 ай бұрын

I've had a lot of emotional struggles in my life that I attributed to being upset about ongoing abuse, domestic violence, sexual trauma, and poverty, and I really, really feel like some things that helped me were practicing mindfulness, yoga, meditation, Reiki, shamanism, and journaling. That said, I think it's valid to also take medication when necessary, but also to be frank, a lot of the shit I was depressed about was societal and I knew from a very young age there was no way to change society so that added to the depression. I found out much later that gut health has an effect on mood, so I started watching my diet and when I changed some things about my diet, I also started to feel better. I wanted to write this here because I wanted people to know there are things we can do to help ourselves be happier and more emotionally stable, and that while it's a process and a lot of factors affect this, it is worth it to seek out therapies, changes in diet, medication, and other changes so that you can get up every day and want to live. Blessings to everyone and good luck taking care of yourself. ❤

This breaks my heart.... It is the most deadly disease which is hard to diagnose and even harder to treat.

Sometimes it's hard to even recognize depression in yourself. It's like, "Oh I guess staying in bed all day in a dark room isnt the best thing... huh?" "But it feels so right!"

@MirzaKhalid

3 жыл бұрын

Exactly....me too

@desireer6915

3 жыл бұрын

Yes... Exactly

@taraquadeer3006

3 жыл бұрын

Too true !

@melodykerr2473

3 жыл бұрын

His music screamed pain. . damn I'm aad

@purplecurious9568

3 жыл бұрын

You didn't catch it but that was just a metaphor, he didn't literally mean you are physically in a dark room.

The ending that reads, if you feel like this you are not alone”...completely misses the mark. I can be in a room full of people...and I am still, always alone. Depression is the loneliest place on Earth.

@user-bf7vu6od4k

3 жыл бұрын

And then you take the steps towards getting help, because that's what you're supposed to do. And there's no help, no fix to this. That's why it's a mental health crisis. Nobody knows what to do. My last attempt at reaching out to the doctors I had a telephone appointment and was sent links to online self-help and a suicide hotline. That was it. I don't expect anyone to wave a magic wand and I know this is ultimately on me but the point of this rant is I'm sick of people acting like help is out there, you're not alone etc. It's all bullshit.

@RumbleFish69

3 жыл бұрын

This is the classic mistake people make when trying to understand depression and suicide. These things are not about feeling alone, or feeling unloved.... Suicide and depression are about the value that one places on the world which surrounds them. People who make the decision to leave this world, are often surrounded by much love and many friends, but they decide to do it anyway. This often confuses people because they always focus on the things that don't matter in these cases.... "He was so loved...He was always surrounded by loved ones, so why would he do this?" Questions like this can never be answered, but more importantly, questions like this are not about the ones who leave, but always about the one who are left behind. It's true, depression can be the loneliest place on Earth and this is something that no person, outside of those who are depressed will ever understand.

@bishopconnor

3 жыл бұрын

@@RumbleFish69 You put that perfectly; “the value that one places on the world”. You can still function, have family and friends, have a successful career, but you’ll still feel like you’re in a place where you don’t belong. Your brain simultaneous has a desire to fit in *and* can’t stand being here. It’s tortuous.

@laughalotlancaster2244

3 жыл бұрын

@@user-bf7vu6od4k Exactly!!!!! And when you are at your worst you are not going to call someone or reach out and it doesn't matter who loves you or what you have, you want to escape what is going on in your head!! Three weeks after I tried to kill myself a psychiatrist is like now you have a support system, call someone. I was like it just happened before and you expect me to reach out now. No one understands except other people like us!!

@SuperNikkiStewart

3 жыл бұрын

I can be alone at home and feel 100% content also. Depression can sometimes come from trauma. I am 53 and working through my own personal trauma, I wish you well, and hope you find your space. Beginning of this year, I was self harming. So when I say, I get it, I am not being trite. xx

When you feel you deserve to be depressed thats when it’s hard to get out of

It breaks my heart someone so loved felt so alone and hopeless , such a tragedy.

@beezybeez4207

Жыл бұрын

you must hear “ The Wave” or “Live Not Survive” by SLT 🤘🎧🔥. Whenever i get down it saves me !!!!!!!!!

Mike also seemed so helpless as Chester is speaking about depression 💔

@swordcoregamer3740

4 жыл бұрын

That's the problem because when I asked my mom what she would do if I sad I'm depressed she answered she don't know Mental problems are one of the most common things in our modern society but we learn (barely) nothing about it in school

@Chris_Vasileiou

4 жыл бұрын

but he helped him many times as Chester said too, but yeah in this interview he seemed helpless..

@benignassassin

4 жыл бұрын

He's all fuckin smiley! I really don't like that

@sofiagustia676

4 жыл бұрын

@@Chris_Vasileiou yeah,like breaking the habit song for example

@enednas801

4 жыл бұрын

@@benignassassin that smile disappeared fast as cb went onto his explanation.he then became really thoughtful.

Chester was an EMPATH n negative emtions tore at his thoughts. Rest in peace.

@nobodyatall4002

4 жыл бұрын

I feel the same way. I never want to express it that way because it sounds very self centered and superficial. I can't for a fact that my feelings good or bad are stronger than anyone else's, but It seems to me other people's negative energy infects me and takes me to the dark room in my mind where I hide away all my negative thoughts. I'm a songwriter as well and when I look back and read my lyrics I just think oh my god, how did I survive and suppress these feelings for so many years

@seangarand3422

4 жыл бұрын

same : (

@stacey7637

4 жыл бұрын

I feel his & everyone's pain... to the point of neglecting myself worrying about things I can't change & people I can't help. But that's just my personal exp. The right medicine does help.

@andysingh

4 жыл бұрын

I can relate

@gymrat_raquel

4 жыл бұрын

@@stacey7637 when i read "to the point of neglecting myself worrying about things i cant change & people i cant help" i totally understand what you feel, it happened with my mom when she was in a car accident, she was bedridden for a few months and i was her caretaker and i devoted myself completley to taking care of her to the point where the only thing i would do to make me feel "pampered" was when u would take a shower, i wanted her to get better at any cost and luckily she is & didnt care what i had to do or give up, same thing happened recently with my dad when he was diagnosed with oral cancer, i dedicated my time to him and he was my only priority. I never cared about doing anything to myself that i would usually do. Luckily i still have both of them and my dads recovering still cancer free & my mom up & walking healthier than ever. Blessings to you & anyone who goes through a time of self neglect, do what your heart feels.

I have worn the happy face mask for 50+ years, and it's getting old. Chester's music speaks to me so much. I'll be 60 soon and tired of pretending. These days I am happiest when I don't have to leave the house and interact with people. Not going to check out for real, just checking out of social life.

He past away, but in his heart, he knew he reached immortality. He just wanted to stop that neverending pain, that neverending feeling of guilt for being depressed, that feeling of "I don't deserve to be happy", even if you didn't do anything that wrong in your life to feel like that, that feeling of misery even if it's a bright beautiful day, a silent and quiet desperation. Hope he rest in peace, knowing he did a lot to help us, random strangers who share this horrid feeling.