Hope you enjoy the video! Let me know what else you guys wanna see in the comments below and if I choose it I'll shout you out in the next video!

@datgaydangernoodle1315

2 жыл бұрын

Do you like turtles :D

@mustafa6023

2 жыл бұрын

second :)

@tipsforyouuu.

2 жыл бұрын

I love it kris you inspire me ❤

@hellspawnsnom7446

2 жыл бұрын

Hi Kris u looking good-er😁

@kathrynvaneker6416

2 жыл бұрын

Love you kris ❤ 💖

The Minecraft reference to the “who didn’t finish cutting down this tree? You cannot just leave them floating!” Got me tbh

@teatalks3426

2 жыл бұрын

Yes

@evamurney5302

2 жыл бұрын

Same gurl/boi

@clowdnesshugs9020

2 жыл бұрын

WAit wat if you’re in Minecraft if you DIDNT finish cutting it wat if it falls 🤨

@aliberry1608

2 жыл бұрын

i dont play it and i smlied

@MMullan22

2 жыл бұрын

yes

"Dad what's dark humour" "You see that guy with no arms over there tell him to clap" "But dad I'm blind" "Exactly"

@kaushikassagur769

2 жыл бұрын

literally *dark* humour

@_Liz_202

2 жыл бұрын

I’ve heard that one lol

@mrwaffle69

2 жыл бұрын

ohh I remember looping that Ik that tiktoker

@MarryPotter8163

2 жыл бұрын

@@user-bn3bv5mh5t ye ikr. Lol ;-;

@ladyyoko3180

2 жыл бұрын

Oh no! I laughed! Im sorry

kris "i scream in my sleep is that anyone else?" the veteran community: "we usually call that ptsd"

I just wanna say " The way she gives us a compliment before the video actually starts" that's really sweet.

Kris you can't box the child back, that's spawn-camping.

@shazba1020

2 жыл бұрын

Trueeee

@jassonlopez1699

2 жыл бұрын

Wtf lmao

@lunar4092

2 жыл бұрын

YUP LMAO

@cjtheterrible2238

2 жыл бұрын

Hey look it’s the best waifu!

@tn68219

2 жыл бұрын

@@cjtheterrible2238 Ah i see, so you are a person of culture as well.

Kris: Let's keep this family-friendly *Also Kris: *proceeds to cuss**

@tsfbaf303

2 жыл бұрын

How is cursing not family friendly? All children know curses, don’t be so prude

@emmyb9130

2 жыл бұрын

@@tsfbaf303 they do but not many families accept cursing from their children (like school aged children)

@MossPathway

2 жыл бұрын

People in my school swear a lot. I don't care if a youtuber swears but kids, or random people in irl

@SStupendous

2 жыл бұрын

@@MossPathway Realistically from 7th Grade to the end of college, most people's schools and education centers have year-groups that swear, let's be honest

@vikkiledgard8483

2 жыл бұрын

@@tsfbaf303 *prudish

As you were saying "If I'm eating I need to be watching something" I'm literally watching you right now while eating suishi

i have really bad humor too and ill never forget when my friend was explaining how his grandma was really weird and i was eating a cinnamon twist from dominos. So i said "see this shape,i hope your grandma looses her hair because of this". little did i know the other friend we were with her grandma died from cancer. i felt so bad. Love ya Kris your hilarious!

@Kris.krisis

8 ай бұрын

HAAHHA OHH NO

-Kris’s optimistic sister: “You wanna hear some dark humor?” -Kris: “Oh yeah, I love dark humor.” -Her sister: “*Turns off the lights* Knock knock.” -Kris: “Turn the Danm lights back on.”

@Phoenix-md8sh

Жыл бұрын

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

@The_tooth_ytalt

Жыл бұрын

fax no printer

@stormcloud3418

Жыл бұрын

I suddenly don't understand

@MidnightStarGirl

Жыл бұрын

everyone's done that joke at this point

@LukeSolita1207

11 ай бұрын

😂

Kris: "I'm 25 and I want to be unalive" Me: "I'm 14 and I'm gonna go drown in a stream" :)

@aletheairvin7920

2 жыл бұрын

What stream you goin to ima join in 😂

@Sellierthanyou

2 жыл бұрын

Beautiful. I’m 15 and I wanna jump off Burj Khalifa- thing??? Idk 💀🤚

@kevinpcrispin

2 жыл бұрын

Can I join you?

@aletheairvin7920

2 жыл бұрын

Lmao group suicide what could be better? We all wanna die it’s normal right…….. RIGHT 😀

@cass4388

2 жыл бұрын

@@aletheairvin7920 More normal than ever

The "Im going to the dollar store oh bleyeuoqdj-" had me dying cause that is so me lol

10:16 there is no way, I’m literally watching this while eating Chick fil a, Kris is so relatable

Kris straight after cussing: This is a family friendly channel

@QueenNebulous13

2 жыл бұрын

Right!? 🤣

@potterhead8963

2 жыл бұрын

No. Framily Friendly Channel.

@blakewright8532

2 жыл бұрын

Yo is no1 gonna take note that kris LIGIT said I swallow s*men like I think u just got caught in 4k🤨📸📸📸

@lh9761

2 ай бұрын

The signature, for sure

I've had exams all day and this just makes everything better 🙃

@kallmekris

2 жыл бұрын

☺️❤️

@ezekielstars4488

2 жыл бұрын

Umm Sus comment

@HampterCEOalt

2 жыл бұрын

Copied comment

@lilynod4070

2 жыл бұрын

Same ! Today Was My Last One And Yours ?

@idk-kd9kz

2 жыл бұрын

Credits to who commented it before u?? 😟

Does anyone else feel good when Kris compliments us?

@user-sr5zr8zk9y

10 ай бұрын

Yass

@deaconlacey7938

10 ай бұрын

YES 100%

@_.-666-._

9 ай бұрын

O b v I o u s l y (in snape voice)

@Kris.krisis

8 ай бұрын

Maybe all the other millions of people who have commented this same thing on every video of hers, really, get creative with comments, people!

@etherealsubs444

8 ай бұрын

@@Kris.krisis so your saying that my compliment on her is stupid and useless because it was already used? Get a life

i love your positive attitude and your realness, you inspire me to just move on and live my life when i actually gave up on it.. love

Kris: Hey, looking good, got something from the dollar store. Also Kris: So let's look at some dark humour.

@kitty_claws_x

2 жыл бұрын

I love her intro cause I feel so much better

“I’m a terrible person” -kris A mood. A literal mood.

"We could go to the dollar store." 'Continues to forget shes in a video, "I got something from the dollar store" ' 'Looks at camera' Oh wait. "Never mind , Okay" 🤣🤣🤣🤣 I absolutly love how she is so honest and doesnt fake her personality for her videos. She is so funny too. (FYI- I cant spell)

The tight hotel bedsheets are for me, celina and all my other sleepwalking buddies 😂😂😂

Her whole personality just makes me happy

@maahachinoy

2 жыл бұрын

Same man

@shwecanaan7513

2 жыл бұрын

Ikr

@shwecanaan7513

2 жыл бұрын

Ikr

@DAMlENTHORN

2 жыл бұрын

Ikr

Kris: “I just want chaos” Me thinking: “I just found my soulmate”

@arktykkwynd6861

2 жыл бұрын

We all want chaos in varying degrees

Can I just say I love your KZread videos so much they bring me joy when I’m sad. You got me over my depression. Thank you so much for bringing me joy. I love you.💚

"IF I am eating something I need to be watching something" Omg that is my too! My food gets cold when I pick to long as well! We fam!❤❤

Kris: "I need to watch something while eating" Me: **Eating rn**

@theBravoTwins.

2 жыл бұрын

@@kynleymarie she hearts a lot of comments- Also we can see that .-. No need to reply to urself yelling it lol it’s cringy

"I'm a terrible person" - Kris who also is the best dog mom to Kevin and makes everyone smile and laugh constantly and is the only reason some of us smile on certain days

@MsetFox

2 жыл бұрын

But it’s Opposite Day

@tylertarbert5041

2 жыл бұрын

Facts

@water9046

2 жыл бұрын

@@MsetFox nah

As a Southern American, I absolutely love your Southern impression! It's so spot on, it cracks me up every time

So straight up love your sense of humor

Kris: "youre looking good, yeah" Me: finally someone appreciates me

@pleaseenteraname4066

2 жыл бұрын

Hahahah…ahhhAAAAAA

@dominique5631

2 жыл бұрын

@@Laquasha2.0 💀

@JunkoEnoshima-

2 жыл бұрын

True

Kris in her intro: “you look good!” Me: *Crying with mascara runing down my face this whole video*

@aiyanalee9755

2 жыл бұрын

OOF that is legit me like every time she posts lmao

@demonfriend4205

2 жыл бұрын

Bruh in was naked I just got out of the hot tub

@fakecastiel1479

2 жыл бұрын

Oh, like from laughter? I thought something was wrong.

@streetlightsglow

2 жыл бұрын

Who are you and how did you get access to my computer camara😊

@dimitri877

Жыл бұрын

I whish I was actually wearing mascara.. wait, wut, no, that's not a more manly thing to say dude..

Love your vids keep up the great work❤❤

Omg Kris love you. You are so funny, you always make my day. Ilysm.

Hearing,”And you can Call me Kris” just makes my whole day no matter what happend

@havebestday8784

2 жыл бұрын

Same

@ennardlovesbutter487

2 жыл бұрын

Yes.

@ennardlovesbutter487

2 жыл бұрын

@@Scoob61233 lol

@tsujajaj

2 жыл бұрын

@@Scoob61233 idk I guess both

@candymarie17

2 жыл бұрын

Even when its sunday night and knowing your going to school tomorrow and you only get a few hours of sleep that night

She's dope. Seems like the kind of friend you can have fun with no matter what you're doing. Like just dying laughing at Walmart.

@RobynK1986

2 жыл бұрын

Or when your in the middle of leeds (a big ish city if you don’t know) and you have no clue where anything is and pull out google maps and try to follow it with your friend We laughed constantly until we found the bus station - one of the best days ever

@KatieM786

2 жыл бұрын

@@RobynK1986 I feel you! I lived in Leeds for a while and it was hella confusing...I spent over an hour one day stuck on the ring road on the way home from work trying to get to my house.

@RobynK1986

2 жыл бұрын

@@KatieM786 lol yea even worse for us we were walking

Im so glad your a youtuber, you remind me of a childhood i never enjoyed

The frog was so flippin' cute!!

Kris: I’m a terrible person Me: Same. The Relatability level just keeps increasing.

@maahachinoy

2 жыл бұрын

Yes

I love her because she actually cares about her audience, it is just so nice and makes up for all my terrible days. Thank you! You've saved me from some terrible days!

@CT--AkaRex

2 жыл бұрын

Same

@teatalks3426

2 жыл бұрын

Same. I want to comment this on a lot of people but I don’t want to be accused of simping 😅

@TonalNation18

2 жыл бұрын

@@teatalks3426 Honestly same 😅

@Goodbye299

2 жыл бұрын

Agreed

@anonimobyaj6035

2 жыл бұрын

Same

12:03 ill be honest i only now realised that was a lamp in the background like i legit thought it was a baseball cap or some shit like that AND I HAVE WATCHED THIS VIDEO MULTIPLE TIMES

10:05 I could not agree more. In fact, I'm home alone tonight and watched your videos while eating Spaghettio's for dinner. 🤣

Dark humour at its finest 🥰

@TonightGamer08

2 жыл бұрын

Agreed

@Demeza16

2 жыл бұрын

Agreed

@fatpotato317

2 жыл бұрын

Agreed

@_mylifesucks_LOL

2 жыл бұрын

👍

@quinn_lu3727

2 жыл бұрын

Agreed

Dark humor is literally my entire personality 😂

@datgaydangernoodle1315

2 жыл бұрын

SAME

@maahachinoy

2 жыл бұрын

Same

@cedarflower

2 жыл бұрын

Yup

@maahachinoy

2 жыл бұрын

Lmaooo

@ladyyoko3180

2 жыл бұрын

Same

T y my mini and I love your content and we appreciate all the fun that we get to have with you and your channel thanks so much you come really far, you look absolutely fabulous and yes you did before LOL🎉😅

they tuck the sheets so tight to help you not bring a stranger to bed and have all sorts of regret. Only room for one under these sheets.

StarBucks: "We're saving the envirememt with our paper straws!" Also StarBucks: Has plastic cups.

@hansika7656

2 жыл бұрын

Hey is this okay?? I am thirteen You better get your teen..... "I saw them smoking"

@sohailaeissa9608

2 жыл бұрын

@@hansika7656 wait what?

@hansika7656

2 жыл бұрын

@@sohailaeissa9608 amm no no I was just asking that is this joke okay you seems like a nice person that's why I asked you well don't tell my mom i was here ❌👄❌

"is it safe to swallow seamen?" Kmc: "I mean I do..." Fucking killed me. Hahaha

@arktykkwynd6861

2 жыл бұрын

And then the frantic denial

Kris's videos are always the video I'm gonna watch when I'm eating LOL

Yup! I have to be watching something when I eat!!! Then I end up heating my food. I’ve learned to find something to watch just before the foods done.

“I’m 25, and I just wanna be… unalived” is it just me or does anyone else wanna just give Kris a hug and tell her its okay We all love u Kris ❤️❤️

@kellyforseth1148

2 жыл бұрын

yes, it be facts

@BATMAN-wc8ln

2 жыл бұрын

Its just you mate

@joshuadonn4615

2 жыл бұрын

Well then there’s smth wrong with you ☺️

@BATMAN-wc8ln

2 жыл бұрын

I'm kidding mate

@kingrazine1579

2 жыл бұрын

I just want to liven't :)

nobody: Kris every time *It* is mentioned: "I'm absina- abstin-" literally love the little skits in between 🥰

the phone got me rolling on the floor🤣😆😆

I always watch you while I eat lol

when she says " i'm a terrible person" but she complements us every video

@eclatshwartzbaumcybertune2063

Жыл бұрын

Thats called a dark empath

@Aleesee1625

10 ай бұрын

I read that as she said it haha

Kris be like: "You're looking good, yeah." Me: looking down at the PJs that I haven't changed out off yet...

@Soy_boy-by8ez

2 жыл бұрын

hey I'm in pjs too :D also fo people like.. change out of thier pjs in thier own home?? like.. doesn't everyone wear pjs at home anyway??

@imbored011

2 жыл бұрын

@Lola Dacey So am I

@phlyingchicken4768

2 жыл бұрын

So am i

@the_king_of_introverts3540

2 жыл бұрын

Well shit i am not in any- FBI OPEN UP!!!

@explodedheart

2 жыл бұрын

@@phlyingchicken4768 So am I

10:06 I’m eating right now and every time I eat I watch one of your videos 😂

The funniest part of this video to me was when you asked "Does anyone scream in their sleep" I'm in tears because of that like I'm just imagining it like “*Sleeping*... AAAAAAAAHHH!!! *Sleeping*” I'm in tears rn

Kris:"We like to keep it family friendly here" Also Kris:"Oh shit"

Once we had overnight guests so my daughter slept in with me. Well I had JUST fallen into a deep sleep, when she sat bolt upright screamed "NINJAS" and laid back down. Needless to say, I had a heart attack and maybe died for a moment or two. While she slept on peacefully and I was wide awake with my eyes bugging out for the rest of the night.

@bluemushroomsoftheforest

2 жыл бұрын

What caused your child to summon a damn ninja at 3am?

@thetunedtank8048

2 жыл бұрын

Once I slept over at my friends house and in the middle of the night I heard meowing...her cat had died 4yrs prior...turned out is was the f*cking parrot XD

@randomlightstand

2 жыл бұрын

@@thetunedtank8048 oh my God

@lexamarie9507

Жыл бұрын

I’ve been known to yell random words or phrases (everything from donuts to damn it ***), scream and mumble a lot. I have also cried so hard or yelled so loud I’ve woken myself up. My family has gotten used to it at this point 😅

@amypowell9963

Жыл бұрын

One time I was at a sleepover and I had a friend who sleep talks, she had yelled really loud it woke every one up

I pick my sunburn too... especially on vacation. And that second one got me cackling asf... 😭

The screaming in your sleep is something I used to relate to but for some reason I don't have dreams anymore.

kris: "does anybody else scream in their sleep" me: "no but i cry in my sleep...a lot" 😀

@maahachinoy

2 жыл бұрын

Lol

@saminraiyan9414

2 жыл бұрын

No

"Hello everyone I am kallmekris and you can call me Kris" is iconic, never fails me in getting a smile on my face, makes my day!!!!

@maahachinoy

2 жыл бұрын

Yasss

About the bedsheets in hotel rooms: I believe, they are for couples that have the blanket-thief-issue 😂

dude the condiments one is so true. our cabin is so old and its got food and stuff from 1998 XD

I heard a theory that Dora is actually blind because she always asks where things are and never looks at anything and boots leads her everywhere 😅

@mrfrogkingg

2 жыл бұрын

Bruh

@Best-vb2om

2 жыл бұрын

more dark humour: Why did Ginny get Harry Potter's scar? Because her and Harry were discovering the chamber of secrets :)

Kris: "You're looking good" Me: "Yeah and I went to the sun last night" Kris: "Wait what??" Me: "What? I thought we were saying things that are impossible."

@maahachinoy

2 жыл бұрын

Lol

@Root_Beer_Vr1

2 жыл бұрын

Hahah

dude its so true i literally cant eat until i watch something

Yes, I do have to have my comfy spot, comfy clothes, & my Powerade + strawberry’s or whatever meal BEFORE I eat 😂

Kris: This is a family friendly channel Also Kris: *Basically admits she's swallowed seman before* 😂

@jaderose-mc2fq

2 жыл бұрын

LMAO

@lucario2able

2 жыл бұрын

Who hasn't though lol

@dogwashthefirst597

2 жыл бұрын

@@lucario2able 📸🤨

@fumiko_is_typing...

2 жыл бұрын

Yes I love ocean male

@Sakuta3220

2 жыл бұрын

@@lucario2able ayoooo 😧

No one: Kris: "This is a famil- *swears* family friendly channel!"

@kitty_claws_x

2 жыл бұрын

I came to the comments to say that

In my school I have the highest GPA alongside some of my classmates, for us its 4.33, that does spark my curiosity though, if schools have higher GPA's, also awesome video!

I am literally watching this while I'm eating dinner. And I can't eat without a video either

Pro tip: pick what you want to watch AS YOUR FOOD COOKS so you don’t have to lose the heat. Just pick, sit, eat, watch🙃

@devil.may.voiceact

2 жыл бұрын

WOW!!!!

@breemari7770

2 жыл бұрын

I use this trick on the daily it’s a miracle worker

@l.linkevych6145

2 жыл бұрын

Yeah, that's a good one. Though the problem is while I pick the video, which cannot be done in a short time, my rice will be fried even though I set it to boil.

Same i can't eat without watching something ,currently iam having rice while watching your video lol 😂

I can tell you all the weird shit I do in MY sleep 😅 • Talking • Walking • Flipping off the air 💀 • Snoring • dancing • crying • Screaming • flipping the damn light switch at the end of the hall • laughing • Whine (Yes literal fucking whining) • Making damn snacks I think that's it 💀

"anyone else scream in their sleep, no? Just me?" Absolutely killed me

@File4Code.x

2 жыл бұрын

One time my lil sister said in her sleep AND I QUOTE "My ToOtHbRuSh Is GaY" ..... I think she needs help 🌝

@idiot560

2 жыл бұрын

@@File4Code.x lololol wtf

@File4Code.x

2 жыл бұрын

@@idiot560 wtf indeed 🌝

@ottomanempire7684

2 жыл бұрын

one time i fell back asleep and still be able to notice i was sleep screaming screamed my brothers name still don't know why i screamed it in that state

@brandyfrasier9716

2 жыл бұрын

i scream in my sleep and sleepwalk...

let’s take a moment to appreciate Kris making us smile everyday

@Simplybobross

2 жыл бұрын

Killua

@cooperwagner5913

2 жыл бұрын

Yes we shall

@DylanSiler

2 жыл бұрын

Fr(Killua 🥰)

@zurrosssss8587

2 жыл бұрын

Yasss

@aletheairvin7920

2 жыл бұрын

Let’s

13:35 This was my reaction to finding a can of pumpkin pie filling from the 60'S!!! 😱 From my Papa's house. Love that man😂, may he rest in peace 🙏 ❤

just now realizing ive been watching kallmekris for over a year starting with tiktok to youtube

Me:expects jokes about dead children (i love dark dark humor) Kris: frog playing poker

Me: wanna hear some dark humour? Kris:sure Me:k "Turns lights off" Me: knock knock Kris: turn the lights back on

@evanbrooksishot3117

2 жыл бұрын

BAHAHAHAHA YES

@evanbrooksishot3117

2 жыл бұрын

@TheHicraft it's a really old vine, it was really popular a while ago

@evanbrooksishot3117

2 жыл бұрын

@TheHicraft YEA EXACTLY AKCJJDNV

@brianhaage9248

2 жыл бұрын

Bruuhhhh dark humour to the max

@Thatonetiktoker-cj8ec

2 жыл бұрын

😆

That one with the plant in the drain reminded me that there is a plant growing in my old school's sink.

Well I talk in my sleep (with eyes wide open and doesn't remember anything when I wake up)😅 but screaming in your sleep is super cool 😂

Kris: " this is a family friendly channel " also kris: " Fuck! "

@Followthecat893

Жыл бұрын

Sorry to be this guy but she said “Channel” not “Show”. Again, sorry.

@joshua1670

Жыл бұрын

@@Followthecat893 no you're fine, thanks for telling me!

@anthonypappagallo4696

Жыл бұрын

Lol so true

@jasonakolacz4464

Жыл бұрын

XD so true!

It's not fair I can't compliment Kris back in-person, she always makes me feel good about myself 😂

I’m eating and watching this at the same time 😂😅

Mad respect for the GOT chair. I really hope all the spin offs come soon! :)

17:55 Just as you said "I can't do it" I got an ad saying "do it", I can't 😂😭

Kris: "This is a family friendly channel." Also Kris: "dumb ass" "Oh shit. Oh shit!!" 🤣

5:25 I laughed so hard I choked on my food😂

It is said that to this day "David" still fears the color green.

Kris, if you were 'unalive' then there would be so many unhappy people. You make us laugh, give us comfort and let us be seen. Keep being you!

Kris: “you look kinda good today, ngl” Literally, i was feeling so insecure, and now you are the star of my day. Thank you Kris, ily

“Is it safe to swallow semen?” “Maybe?” God, I love Bob The Drag Queen, he does great drag 😂

“Where do you work?!” “I accidentally put my finger in the subway fresh cutter…”

@ZavyJR1

8 ай бұрын

“Oops I did it again…”

me - *just woke up* Kris - “you look good” me - “aww thank you”

@sunshine_afton

11 ай бұрын

same!!!!

@Hazeltrunk7

9 ай бұрын

Kris- I know you're naked me-DANG GURL HOW DO YOU KNOW???

@im_gay_forVeritasRatio

7 ай бұрын

Me- *stressing about school and stuff* Kris- "You look fabulous" Me- "You are my favorite, and the only reason I have any confidence" (I only believe her compliments lol, not any I get from people irl)

@im_gay_forVeritasRatio

7 ай бұрын

@@Hazeltrunk7 So true tho

Kris: “this is a family friendly channel” Also Kris: *”i too swallow semen”*

I am here for the dark humor love it

The fact that I watch your videos when I eat is entertaining to me