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@jerrye9221

2 жыл бұрын

New subscriber, great video, love the comment section also!

@saymabagwan2999

2 жыл бұрын

I wanted to ask something. I'm an INFJ but I'm not exactly an adult and I don't wanna grow up. I decided to accept it as it is part of life but it still leaves a sour taste in my mouth. What should I do?

@jerrye9221

2 жыл бұрын

@@saymabagwan2999 I know this wasn't directed at me but seeing as I'm all grown up and then some (54yrs)😃 do you mind me asking what part about being an adult leaves a sour taste in your mouth?

@goteamslugs

2 жыл бұрын

@@saymabagwan2999 You'll always be yourself no matter what age you are buddy! =)

@tomwilliams6744

Жыл бұрын

Just a question .... would you (Psych-O) ever do a video on what it's like for an INFJ being retired?

Best advice I've gotten 3 things 1 always trust your instinct, it's not wrong. 2 never let go of your inner child, adult hood is grossly over rated. 3 be mindful of who you let in, not everyone's intentions are pure.

@PSYCH-O

2 жыл бұрын

Love number 2, I think INFJs have to remind themselves of that everyday 🙏

@nfk4437

2 жыл бұрын

Number 1 hit me hard✋🏻

@ST-rj8iu

2 жыл бұрын

I am in INFJ approaching midlife and this is so true!

@daveypak9673

2 жыл бұрын

All of them hit me hard. 1. I always feel 'this is the way to go' , but somehow get swayed by someone else's plan- even when I feel strongly its the wrong way. But I don't want to offend so I just let it go... and lo and behold, my way was the way to go. And always end up going there anyway- but in a round about way. Happens so often- I've learn to trust my instincts more. 2. I'm such a kid at heart- and constantly pressured to grow up. But I don't want to. I love being a child at heart - and will never let it go :D 3. People are indeed more evil than they seem at first glance. Especially the ones that SEEM good. They are often the ones who burnt me the most. The ones I thought would be hard headed, and had bad intentions tended to have softer hearts -just with a thorny exterior.

@richardcurley1129

2 жыл бұрын

@@daveypak9673 yes Yes, boss told me to grow up once. We almost fought about it. My kids are more grown up then I am. Yes

I'm an INFJ, who never felt true love and acceptance until the day I met my INFJ husband. The next time I felt it was when I met his INFJ mother. We INFJs need to start a club so we can feel some sense of normalcy and be around people who don't get on our nerves.

@johnnycorn7225

2 жыл бұрын

Yes, yes, yes!!! Most of the time I'm walking around like I got born into the wrong world we need a redo.

@The_Codependency_Cure_PsyM

2 жыл бұрын

Wow, not all INFJ have your luck...

@ericanorton71

2 жыл бұрын

@@The_Codependency_Cure_PsyM I waited 37 years for my husband. No one else was good enough. Now I know why, our ethics and morals are too high for regular humans. And we're existing on so many levels at the same time, regular people will never understand us.

@ericanorton71

2 жыл бұрын

@@johnnycorn7225 be glad you're one of us. We're amazing.

@johnnycorn7225

2 жыл бұрын

@@ericanorton71 definitely, wouldn't have it any other way!!

I’m 47 INFJ and here is my top five advice. 1) be very careful whom you have sex with! It is a soul connection and their DNA literally links with ours for life. 2) Create and maintain strict physical and energetic boundaries with everyone! Family, kids, boss, etc 3) always watch actions and never listen to words 4) true love is so rare it is almost nonexistent. Be happy being single, it’s not you, it’s this world. 5) Don’t open up to people! Some don’t care, some are happy you have trauma and most lack the ability to think or feel any depth at all.

@vanessathomas1148

2 жыл бұрын

my dear If I had known this I would have spare myself a lot of heart brake, watch action is so real my god, I take people at their words but I was seeing their actions before getting it to a relationship and get burn for it, my advice is don't get in to anything relationship or anything until you want too

@colonelgraff9198

Жыл бұрын

*Traumatized Empath Spotted*

@sarikajoshi7156

9 ай бұрын

I am actually following this and I am just 21

@Okyourite

8 ай бұрын

Number 5 hits hard .

@B-SharpBenchmarks

8 ай бұрын

😭wish I read it 2 years ago

Aim for excellence , not perfection. Don't be too hard on yourself when your expectations are not met. Remind yourself of your many achievements, to keep your self esteem positive. INFJ 's are know to experience bouts of depression throughout their lives , be aware when your experiencing , "dark times ". Learn about depression and how to deal with it . Practice Self -Love to heal. Experiences from a 61 year old INFJ.

@PSYCH-O

2 жыл бұрын

Love it!! 💙

@daveypak9673

2 жыл бұрын

That is surprisingly deep. I always strive for perfection, which leads to no where really- only sadness. But excellence is achievable. I've always believed myself to be good at most things, but never great. And to me, "great" has always been synonymous with perfection. But excellence seems to mean strive beyond good, but always have room to grow, definitely achievable.

@wit7882

2 жыл бұрын

Thank you

@sayusayme7729

2 жыл бұрын

61 here too. Great advice. Thank you

@kindGSL

Жыл бұрын

@@daveypak9673 I found a ton of support in Girl Scouting, where their motto to "be your best" is a part of the whole experience. I love how it is not intended for us girls to compete with each other, which we do plenty of, but to focus on each of us improving ourself.

50 something Self Realized INFJ here. Here are my tips for young INFJs. 1. Follow your innate curiosity- it will always serve you well. 2. Learn to trust your intuition yet always verify, fortify, and affirm your intuitive perceptions with reason, rationality, and logic. 3. Learn the technique of emotional clearing. An excellent book is "Emotional Clearing" by John Ruskan. 4. Embrace your body and your instincts consciously. This is usually the last thing INFJs want to do because this is our inferior function. Ground yourself and take on a discipline like walking, working out, or yoga. This will bring you balance and health. By learning to clear and heal your emotional wounds, blocks, and karmic backlog, you will attain Self Realization if you practice this consistently. Like Dr. Jung said, "One does not become enlightened by imagining beings of Light, one become enlightened by making the darkness conscious". This process will transform an INFJ into a stronger, much less emotionally sensitive, more loving, wiser, improved person and Self. Being INFJ is good!

@janinegulley9699

2 жыл бұрын

Thank you for this advice.

@lunayoureright

Жыл бұрын

🙏 thanks

@kindGSL

Жыл бұрын

Trust but verify.

@Flowers408

Жыл бұрын

This is soooo helpful! Thank you ❤

@andyjm7122

Жыл бұрын

Thanks x

I think INFJ have the hardest time taking the first step of anything in life it's so stressful they just shut down but when they get past that first step. There is nothing to stop them

It's kind of hard to miss THE FACT, that since we are so rare, maybe we were created for a higher purpose. Since I can read people so effortlessly and can sense when their hurting. I've taken it upon myself to PRAY 🙏 for those that are hurting, even if their trying to hide it. With times getting so hard in this world, people need prayer MORE THAN EVER. YOU ARE ALL A GIFT FROM GOD TO THIS WORLD. After all why do we not only care so much, but have the ability to notice those who are drowning in their sorrows. Be strong. NEVER REJECT THE FEELINGS BREWING IN YOUR HEART.

@kindGSL

Жыл бұрын

This is how it worked out for me, I took my teenaged daughter to the doctor because she was suffering from terrible headaches. Not her regular pediatrician, but a stand in. I could tell right away this man was a wolf interesting in preying on her. He proscribed Vicodin and I hit the roof. I knew right away what was on his agenda. It turned me into a drug war political activist.

I am 52 years old and have recently discovered that I am an infj, and it's changing my life. I am shocked at how accurately other people can describe exactly how I think and feel. Reading the comments is like reading my own mind. It's such an odd feeling yet it brings me a great sense of comfort to be able to communicate with fellow infj's, as I have ralrely been able to connect with people on such a level, and actually want to be part of a community.... which I would normally totally avoid. Thanks for posting the vid and thanks for the comments. I am learning to embrace my unique qualities and empower myself. I totally agree that it's important to realize that because we tend to overthink things, we create a world in our minds that is not reality, and others may see you differently than you think they do.

@najiabushibba8963

8 ай бұрын

U r not a lone ,,,we always here for u ...😊

My advice would be to not be suprised if you connect with many other people but that rarely does anyone connect with you. Its a strange thing how others think they have connected with you on a deep level because you have listened to them and learned all about them but they actually have no idea who you are.

@kayliacrockett8492

8 ай бұрын

Lol this comment made me laugh. 😂❤ so accurate. You ever had people you considered acquaintances call you their best friend suddenly 🥹🦠 like… bro…. I’m your best listener*

@kayliacrockett8492

8 ай бұрын

Stoppp 😭🙏🏽🫥💫😮‍💨

@susanday3478

8 ай бұрын

It's quite sad really.😔

The most life-changing piece of advice I have received as an INFJ came from non-INFJs. They told me I shouldn't share my time and ideas with others as I would be taken advantage of and it would cost my success at work. I tried it. Big drop in productivity. Failure? No. I realized that I need to help people and make life better for others, but that I should choose those opportunities which also helped me. Life changing. The other piece of advice I received earlier in life was to not work on someone else's goals more than they were. Not only is that not a fair balance, but it can actually be demotivating to the person you are trying to help. That advice was spot on.

@makoyloloy728

2 жыл бұрын

I think that phrase you've said "you shouldn"t share your ideas" are most INFJ's mindset/saying. As an INFJ who advices my non INFJs friends, this is what I always ask them whenever they are struggling is to keep their plans hidden and smart to avoid mistreatment/judgement from other people. I just want to make it clear that INFJs are best in keeping ideas secret and silent. Don't mistake my word, I think ur not an INFJ getting advice from an INFJ friend.

@PSYCH-O

2 жыл бұрын

Great pieces of advice, thank you for sharing!! 💙

@Rin-ig3ci

Жыл бұрын

I recently dodged a bullet. I spent a week working on a plan I thought was going to be amazing(a 20+ birds with 1 stone type deal), but then the person it was designed to help shockingly had no interest in what I had for them, even though it was entirely designed around the idea of making their own wishes come true. It left me with a sour taste in the back of my mind going, "Who in their right mind would say no to the chance of reaching their own dreams when they themselves are always complaining about not being able to achieve them?!?" I even asked them when they were thinking they were going to start working on their dream and they said, "Maybe next year". My next thought was, "This person has been complaining for 20 years about not being able to do what they want, and i just realized why" When I saw how fucked up that was, I noped out of that situation and was just glad that I didn't spend any more time on it than I already did. "Maybe next year" after 20 years of nothing, is going to amount to either "never" or "maybe someday, but when it does it will fail because of their own actions, and it would take them down along with everyone around them". That person may not think that what they are doing is affecting anyone but themselves, but it actually IS toxic to everyone around them. I have had a close relationship with 2 people who were like this, "complaining, but then refusing to do anything about it, and possibly hoping some 'magic' will happen to do it for them". I ended up regretting both relationships ever happened at all, and I've avoided trying to start any actual connections with people since. I am just afraid that I won't notice it soon enough if it happens again, after already becoming emotionally involved. I might make some "friends" someday, but I have a hard time imagining any relationships becoming real anymore. I think the only reason I was able to dodge that bullet recently, is because it was more of a business deal than a relationship, it seemed to be more straightforward in telling me what the person was like. ...maybe I can make "business deal" situations in the future that can actually be like relationship gathering info? 🤔 I wonder how that would work...? (thinking to myself, lol)

@bethiciaprasek9415

Жыл бұрын

@@Rin-ig3ci I sometimes am not on schedule with my goals, but early in my life would invest more in other people's goals than they did. Now it is more **it or get off the pot. Even if I do it for you, you won't maintain it because you didn't earn it.

my advice is... care less, less stress.

Off the top of my head I would tell a younger INFJ to follow their interests and not to sit still - it will all start to make sense eventually.

@Thilosophocl3s

2 жыл бұрын

It's later than we think, lol

@kindGSL

Жыл бұрын

That is good advice.

Wow! "Not everyone will have the same morals or need saving." This is something I learned the hard way. If I had known/realized this, I could have spared myself much pain and heartache.

I just wanna add one more advice here..my fellow infj don't stuck in perfectionistic behavior ,cuzz nothing in life is perfect.

Its THE BEST video for an INFJ and the best advice in this video is BE SELFISH....

Ideal path? 14 years in waste management, 7 years of college for a salaried management career that doesn't pay enough to make student loan payments...I love being a truck driver. I get to work alone, engage my Se all day long while allowing my Ni to run on autopilot... for 10 hours a day, if I'm on the road, zero stress, unending intuitive revelations, or simply learn anything through audio books while I'm driving. The worse advice came from my old man, who was a truck driver "you're a great draw-er, but have you ever heard the term 'starving artist?' You better find a trade, or do good in college if you want to get ahead in this world." When I'm off work, or even on the phone on the road, I get to guide people through personal development, healing, and spiritual Awakening.

@kayliacrockett8492

8 ай бұрын

I’m a fed artist ❤🎉 you should pick it up again 😊 It’s connected to your inner child and it will gift you the stillness you feel inclined to lean towards.

There was a comment on here a few minutes ago but it got deleted but if ur still out there this was my reply :) Well I’m an infj done the test a thousand times and then went further into studying Mbti and the more I study the more sure I am and yet i still find myself doubting. I think it’s an infj thing, we are so used to not understanding ourselves that when we are offered somewhat of an explanation we subconsciously run from it.

@angieholt736

2 жыл бұрын

Awesome answer!

@aprilk569

2 жыл бұрын

I didn't post the original comment, but as a chronic deleter of comments, I love that you still posted the reply 😊 Cheers!

@hugmc

2 жыл бұрын

Go too Scot Morgan on Infj

@jonathancinzio8651

2 жыл бұрын

@@aprilk569 haha thanks I used to be the same, that’s why I was like nope I better still post this it might still reach them 😆

@PSYCH-O

2 жыл бұрын

Great insight, my friend - thanks for sharing, I don't think you're too far off 🙏

I've only listened to the first two advices and I can already tell where this is going; I can't continue listening. The general theme will be to be more selfish , less ideal, and to dismiss our own thoughts about ourselves that others tell us rather than trying to make sense of it, and that will kill everything that makes INFJ's happy. Some INTJ's mislabel themselves as INFJ's, and INTJ's are more likely to agree with this video, but INFJ's find true happiness in helping others and looking for the most ideal path within their visions. Changing this will not make an INFJ happy.

Your suffering provided you your natural gifts. Commit to healing from your past and reclaim your power. Use that willpower to express your gifts and contribute to humanity the way you are meant to.

@PSYCH-O

2 жыл бұрын

Sweet and simple, totally agreed!

@jennifergraham5615

4 ай бұрын

Really good! Actually it’s so cool all this advice people put down but this is the one that hit the best for me. All my best!

@chasingdreams222

3 ай бұрын

Amen-this is the one!!! ❤

@RenFoodie

3 ай бұрын

❤

My family has never understood how I could possibly be okay with being alone all the time and not going to random places at random all the time. My parents in particular have always tried to influence me to "go out, meet people, join groups, make friends, etc." When I was younger, this easily made me feel inadequate as a human being, thinking that there must be something wrong with me for being happy as a complete hermit. The idea that being a hermit was a bad thing. It took getting older and standing against my own family before I realized that everyone around me was just pushing their own ideas onto me. So, they were the ones in the wrong, and I am perfectly happy with the way I am. In fact, being anything but who I am, would only invite others to damage me further. I am still a little lost on where I am in life, what I want to do, and how I am going to create a positive environment for me. But I think, in time, I will figure it out. My inner child had been suffocated for quite some time (parents contributed to that the most), so I'm still in the process of trying to revive him after never actually having the chance to get to know him very well 😂

@Clover501

Жыл бұрын

Good for you, can I get a progress check? Like, how’ve you been so far since this comment? Good? Bad? Morally questionable? Idk, tell me?

@zohanoman6045

8 ай бұрын

Sameeeee EXACTLY!

@mussharatnaaz1325

Ай бұрын

You look like an exact replica of me. Never thought I'd see one.

Unfortunately, the advice that impacted me the most is one that seems negative: Be more selfish! It took me 37 years to understand that, in a perfect world, being selfless would be ideal, everyone looking after everyone else, but in the real world, it only leads to people taking advantage of you. You need to put yourself first and then you can help other people.

As a "senior" INFJ I can say you nailed it. Well done!

@PSYCH-O

2 жыл бұрын

Thank you so much!! 🙌

Basically it’s about reconnecting with BALANCE, that would go for all types but the INFJ is the most capable of doing this. As the most adaptable type you have the ability to do and have it all and the only one holding you back is yourself. In my opinion a younger INFJ would be the last type to give advice to, the real problem is living through someone else’s intentions and not your own. The INFJ grows through experiences more so than other types and those experiences leading you towards your purpose needs to be experienced without bias. INFJs see into the higher concepts of reality beyond mere good and evil as the end goal is purpose but most get confused thinking that that purpose is towards others when in reality the help we give others actually helps ourselves. Never let the outside dictate the inside and the INFJ is here to become whole again as basically the only type having one foot still on the other side yet still being able to navigate in the 3D simultaneously. Many INFJs probably had an invisible friend as a child and usually hold on to that awareness longer than most intuitive types. To all my Marvel fans similar to what the Scarlet Witch was doing at the end of the Wanda/Vision series, the spirit self operating independently of the physical yet still in tandem all at once effortlessly. It’s that trust in knowing that your Higher-self will always have your best interest at heart as it is that part that is connected to God through you. That childlike aspect of oneself is to be integrated into oneself and not tossed aside for adulthood. It’s all about the integration of self, the good, the bad and the ugly that creates the balance and the wholeness in oneself but most have a tendency not to even start this process for fear of what they might find. In turn that automatically creates a distrust in ones true self and it’s finding that TRUST which should be the main focus on the journey. The INFJ knows everything they need to know and it’s all within and came here to experience it outwardly in this 3D which is why anything is possible for the INFJ once they remove that fear and doubt that society has placed in them. So of course to some degree we want to help each other out as we all have done but all those trips and falls are also needed and necessary for personal spiritual growth. For most it’s a healing process for most of their life until they learn to play the game and the INFJ holds all the cards. You eventually realize that energy vampires are more afraid of you when you realize energy flows both ways and are able to control the flow as we are actually master manipulators, yet society tries to subconsciously make that a bad thing. Everyone is manipulating everything and everyone around them at all times be it conscious or unconsciously and we’re actually the best at it. Once you get to the point of acceptance where you truly and honestly wouldn’t change one second of your life’s experiences you realize you’re on the path. Life is seen through a new childlike lens where everything is new and can be experienced in a new awareness, even the mundane aspects of life. A woman in a movie said “Life is tough, that’s the default setting” and that rang with such truth and if we’re not here leveling up what are we doing? At 54 I realize this is the greatest time to be alive which is why we came here at this time to experience it and we’re not just here to live through it but live in it through intention. Once all fear and doubt are removed you realize that everything is as it should be and if you’re truly playing the game you’re not experiencing what most are as you realize you’re truly in control. Before I start to sound any crazier just want to say great video and good luck on your journeys and please remember to have fun and enjoy this chance at life God has given us and everyday we wake up is a day closer to our purpose! 🙏❤️🙏

@Matt-hh2ye

2 жыл бұрын

Wow very well put together. You don't sound crazy at all. I'm coming to find a lot of what you said here to be true. As a 28 year old, I have so much growing to do but I'm slowing finding my path and learning to trust my instincts while I also figure out how to just enjoy the ride. Thanks for sharing Row row row your boat gently down the stream merrily merrily merrily Life is but a dream

@notahouse

2 жыл бұрын

@@Matt-hh2ye Thank you, you'll find many rabbit holes along the path and just be careful to remember to come up for air every now and then. It's an amazing ride but can also be a lonely one especially if you haven't connected with your true self who's always waiting for us. It's a blessing to be able to experience such experiences as the majority never begin the process. Continue with the healing and growth and except and trust the help you're giving yourself. Eventually so many things will begin to heal from the other-side and you'll notice when things are no longer an issue and you'll literally realize you didn't have to put in much effort on this side. Everyday is a new day and take it one at a time and you'll be good! Good luck and realize you've already done this.

@iofb.hulder

2 жыл бұрын

Goodness, thank you for delivering that post to us! Completely accurate and puts a lot into perspective. It reminds me of that Max Ehrmann quote: "Go placidly amid the noise and the haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible without surrender, be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly, and listen to others, even the dull and ignorant; they too have their story. Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love - for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment it is perennial as the grass. Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you from misfortune. But do not distress yourself with imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be, and whatever your labours and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life keep peace with your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world".

@notahouse

2 жыл бұрын

@@iofb.hulder That was beautiful, thank you!

I have always loved to learn new things. Not the typical INFJ. 🤷 I learned safe self-boundaries early after many crappy experiences with crappy people in this world. I stopped people pleasing in my early 20's and evolved. I definately don't embrace energy vampires and players. If people don't embrace their own need for help, I move on. I have ALWAYS known who I am and what I want in life. I stopped trying to fit in when I realized I have nothing in common with most people. I don't do what other people do, I don't think like other people and I don't function the same way as other people. Its called embracing uniqueness.

@Riddhimma.bansal

2 жыл бұрын

Embracing uniqueness woah 👏😃🥹

@jasbadsirron6424

2 жыл бұрын

Constantly learning new things is very much a trait of an INJF. Very typical. It's all about sample data - the more samples you have (in every possible experience), then the better intuition can be expressed with accuracy and purpose. Think of it as a higher resolution of logic. I've also found that finding ways to express yourself physically can help - guitar, singing, dancing, sports etc.

@theroaminggnomad

2 жыл бұрын

@@jasbadsirron6424 that's definately us

"Be more selfish" I came across this advice before and I just transformed completely to a bright new person it might feel weird to be a bit selfish but it's self love. It's okay it's healthy

I had two toxic relationships until I learned my lesson, I confused physical attraction to our “ compulsive “ desire to help heal others , my ex Wife had a terrible childhood and latter my fiancé a terrible marriage , since learning what I am and going back to my past it came to me sort of an “ light bulb “ kind of knowledge why I ended in those relationships. I really hope you guys try to avoid that in your life, It simply doesn’t end well for us . My advice ? Open your senses and learn to differentiate between real love and our need to help others. It is the first one, go for it , but if it is the second ,run away as fast as you can, honestly, it will make us terrible unhappy because, we can’t help everybody and we end up giving everything we can / have and … we are empty so do me a favor and find a partner without past issues that “ scream “ help me. All the best for you guys, stay true and be happy. Best regards Franz

@nancyfunk615

2 жыл бұрын

I ended up married to someone I felt no need to help, and someone I felt I could lean on for help when I needed it...we both agreed to not 'manipulate' the other (the way we feel the urge to do for others around us to try helping ensure those others have a happy life), but promised to be as up-front as we could to each-other. Honestly, one of the best decisions in my life.

@franzjosefmueller-alban509

2 жыл бұрын

@@nancyfunk615 Hi and thank you for sharing your story, I feel happy for you. Hopefully one day I will be lucky and find someone who I trust to tell her my true self . All the best for you and your significant , stay true Best regards Franz

@tracyovercomer

2 жыл бұрын

Great insight! This has happened to me also and so I appreciate the confirmation of what I’m now realizing..

@vanessathomas1148

2 жыл бұрын

@@franzjosefmueller-alban509 I myself was with someone who had problem and I wanted to help him but it turns out he thinks that I have a problem, thanks god I am a infj, although I suffer embarrassment, humiliation, I have faith in God he will get what he served to me but being infj, he is dead to me I learn that he is not good enough for me anyways

The last one hit me the most !! I always try to fit in and I'm starting to become good at it but it costs me all my energy for a poor result

To live life selfishly. I think always of others before me and most of the time forget myself in the process... Haha... Sad but true. 😅😅

Tip Number 5: don't avoid those other types of people as a younger INFJ. It's vital that you experience as many different types of people and situations as possible at a young age whilst your brain is still developing. If you hide away and isolate and only hang with others who don't challenge your intuition give you the experiences you need to fully develop your INFJ skills, then you will become depressed, confused, isolated and frustrated at people and the world as you age. INFJs are empathetic beings with strong intuition and logic - if you don't force yourself into situations that exercise this, you will cause mental health issues. Our purpose is to understand others and the world as much as possible so that we can improve it from ALL perspectives and help others paint a vision of the future that sometimes only we can see.

@jasbadsirron6424

2 жыл бұрын

The downside to this is that yes, you will get taken advantage of. Yes, you will get burnt. Yes, you will have regret. If you have the attitude of 'Poor Me', you will see it as suffering and become bitter. If you have the attitude of 'Every experience is a blessing', then you will develop powers beyond what you can imagine. Only through suffering and conflict can we have opportunities to truely grow. See it as such and your life will become full of purpose and strength.

@aekorfker

2 жыл бұрын

Those last sentences are so incredibly spot on with how I feel, but I’ve never heard someone else say the same thing before.

@kindGSL

Жыл бұрын

I wonder if you would still say that if you knew about my "Return of Jesus' political action project. I started it in 2003 and have seen some world changing events occur because of it.

@rayzeusmusic

Жыл бұрын

That’s is so true! Now that I’ve experienced bad situations with different people, I can recognize the pattern for later in life to avoid it completely. Gotta touch the stove to know that it’s hot sometimes. 💯

My Dad gave me the best advice ever, set yourself up so you have the least amount of people that can tell you what to do. I worked hard, got lucky, and unconsciously followed my INFJ traits, and I’m now retired before 40 and through investing and family wealth I only have to focus on myself and those I care about and we as a family will never want for any of our needs while getting a lot of the things we want. I don’t mean just material needs and wants. My family and I still have mental health struggles, but we love each other and I’m helping them learn to establish and respect boundaries. It can be a beautiful life if an INFJ gets lucky and becomes aware early. I hope we all become aware of ourselves sooner. It would make life beautiful for everyone.

Finding the inner child again is brilliant advice - Thank you for that! As an INFJ I tend to be super-aware of social conversations, and re-thing most of the conversations afterwards, to pull out anything that might've offended someone. This is extremely tiring. I therefore prefer just spending time in solitude. Finding the inner child is helping to find your true north again. I've have learned that you don't have to spend time on things or places or people you don't particularly connect with.

Yet again a five star presentation of a topic. Energy vampires, well, there you have the narcissists, the worst vampires of all, and I wish I would have had more knowledge about this topic when I was a teen. Back then I had a huge problem with such an individual mainly 'cause I was not aware of such concepts as the narcissistic personality and 'cause I was desperate to have a friend. It was at high school that we two got together for none of us were accepted by our classmates. Well as it later turned out, he was a narcissist vampire, and things ended up really bad for me so that it all developed into something like an implicitly slavery-like relationship till I cut off all ties when I went to live abroad, but some years later it happened that we met again. His life had turned into a quagmire with no life prospects at all, he had no one to "feed on" and he was so very desperate to bring our "friendship" back to life that he even apologized for having acted with me like he did in the past, but I could massively feel that his real goal was to continue where we had left years ago. Even then it was hard to cut that redeveloping connection because of the experiences from the past so that in the end I had to create unfriendliness between us, which is something I would have never dared doing back then. It was not pleasant but my mental well-being was at stake so I had to. So it is not worth making such sacrifices out of fear of remaining friendless. Anyway I wish I had had a clear vision of what I wanted in life back then, I chose a totally wrong career path and the aftermath of this decision keeps hunting me even today. I realized too late that my true passion was the study of languages, of which I am learning the seventh now. I wish I would have had it clear back then right from the beginning by taking a fixed path instead of jumping from fantasy to fantasy. Young INFJs should avoid falling into this trap for one may end up nowhere in life. Having it clear as soon as possible is a must, for the more one fantasizes about this and that, the more one gets aimless and lost. It is also of key importance to be selfish in the sense of being more self-centered. It is easier to focus on others than on yourself of course, this is something innate to an INFJ and mentally it is very taxing to focus on one's stuff and put aside others', but it is very rewarding and really, it is also a matter of common sense. Trying to fit in a wrong environment may lead to making a fool of oneself, many times experienced already, and things get even more awkward when one initially belongs to a segment of the society one should not have been born into so that one gets totally ostracised and truly feeling like an absolute alien. Just imagine being surrounded with epitomically extrovert and shallow people all the time in a community whose core values are merrymaking and carefreeness. The worst nightmare it is, a complete life ruiner. So sometimes it is not just in one's head, but it is an awful reality. Well and regarding morals and how to cope with evilness, just look at what is happening today in the world. I think I am getting a heart condition because of paying attention to the daily news.

@Cale_Davison

2 жыл бұрын

"Spent the Day in Bed" by Morrissey ?

@rupinderh01

2 жыл бұрын

Me too, narc friend as a child, wrong career multiple times

@Rin-ig3ci

Жыл бұрын

Yeah, I try to find out what's going on in the world and I am always confronted with the thought: "Should I try and do something about this? .....should I even bother?" It's gotten hard to know when to hit the "let's ignore this" button, but most of the time that button gets hit for me because I find that, logically, I CAN'T do anything about it. So... I've gotten into the habit of only paying attention to science related news and the like. If it's not true, sometimes, it'll be pretty obvious, and if you can't tell, I probably didn't need to learn about that anyway. 🤷‍♂️ Also, if anything, it's just more interesting things to learn about... That's always better than hearing how "Guy 1 hit Guy 2 and caused 'this problem' and how it does or doesn't related to me".

Had someone ask me one time what planet I was from.....I told em well............I'm not from Uranus

I've been so happy,but also scared if I dare say, sense I've learned I'm an infj..This is so needed, I'm 37 and in growth.

@Clover501

Жыл бұрын

There’s a lot of people in this comment section say they are “in growth” but what does that mean? Do you read more books, watch more TV shows, help more people, eat healthier food, and/or what? I’m asking for clarification and understanding, as I am not an INFJ…unfortunately.

"Maybe you're an alien, but in this life you're human."...I love this. Most of the time we're cheering others up and give the advice, that they're human... humanity, it's all about failure and imperfectness. We can tolerate imperfectness in other people but we're not the same with our own imperfectness 🤔. And for me there's another thing I realized nearly 10 years ago...we like to help others, but it's getting us so hard to resive help. I've often thought about this and analysed, why it is so hard to get help, when we need some...it's the thing, that I've to stay strong on my own the whole life and I was used to do everything on my own. My besti offert me some help sometimes (carry a bag or open a door or some other simple things like this) and often I refused, because I was so used to do this on my own. And one day I was aware about the circumstance, that this hurts him a lot. After I changed (slowly...it wasn't easy) my habbit and showed some "weaknesses", Karma took me to the next level and now I'm getting help from everywere. It was a long way but finaly I succeed.

@Clover501

Жыл бұрын

Actually, speaking of “it’s so hard to receive help,” I need advice on how to “help” my INFJ friend be less hard on themselves, and accept help from others, do you, as an INFJ, think this is possible? What do you feel are the chances that she’ll accept help from others? How could I help her accept help from others such as family, friends, ect?

@Clover501

Жыл бұрын

Also, glad you succeeded 🎊 🎉😅

@Lost-sj22

Жыл бұрын

@@Clover501 Everything is possible, that's why I think, you'll succeed some day. Ask your friend in an random situation, what it feels like, when he/she's helping someone. The most possible answer is, that it makes him/her feel good. And then aks him/her, what he/she thinks it makes with you, when he/she refuse help. I think, that the other person don't know your feelings about this matter...if he/she would, I think this situation would be another. Stay strong and don't give up 💪

@Lost-sj22

Жыл бұрын

@@Clover501 Thank you and I wish you the best on your way 🤗

I WISH I had an INFJ Elder... 😿 BUT these videos are the Closest, I have ever been, to having someone understand me, for now 😊😊☺☺

@TheDarkness1

2 жыл бұрын

If you have any questions to ask, feel free. Currently have spare time.

@thoughtswithmolly2184

2 жыл бұрын

I'm so lucky that both myself and my mother are INFJ. We have the best converstions :)

Well, my Therapist mentioned that I should live out my life for myself instead of trying to make happiness for others. A way of doing that is by ignoring and not acknowledging the comments that people make around me over a set career path. Know that you (INFJs) should live your own life and let others know that they can not make those life decisions for you. As such, they will try to guilt-trip you and you need to learn to cut the channel of empathy or you will fall for their trap. Lastly, I agree that everyone has different morals even within families and siblings. For traditional families, it will break the parent's hearts knowing that siblings will not see eye to eye. The worst-case would be that siblings won't see nor communicate once their parents pass away. We as INFJs have a unique mindset and we need to let people know that we have personal boundaries that should not be crossed, otherwise consequences will occur with the social relationships. It is not childish; it is very human to have an ego. By ego, I mean respect for an individual who is humanistic in behavior. I hope everyone has a wonderful and pleasant day.

@estebangorrini

2 жыл бұрын

I totally agree

Thank you 🙏Deep down I knew it was the wrong environment but kept telling myself it’s me who doesn’t do enough and should step out more out of my comfort zone… My surrounding doesn’t do the bare minimum, meanwhile, I push myself so hard ..

Trying to make everyone happy will make you feel really uninterested in world, so pick the good people in your life; that way you can care for them more and leave the rest behind. As well as don't pull yourself in too many direction because it is not good for your health. Keep it cool keep it calm

@PSYCH-O

2 жыл бұрын

Well said!

Staying in incompatible situations is hard. Some times to keep the peace you have to not let the shadow side fight your way threw and save everyone the pain it will cause to have you withdraw more and taking you further down that spiral. Doing a door slam on someone you love hurts you badly but saves them the pain slowly losing you.

The et part made me smile, thanks I needed it:)

I can't explain how understood and content this video made me feel. Thank you

Not the best, but the worst pieces of advices have definitely been given to me and they are: 1. You don’t open up, open up. I’d say always trust yourself and don’t force yourself to do open up to other/specific people. You will end up giving them space in your life they don’t deserve in a way that doesn’t serve you and will have to suffer or get hurt because of them. Be who you are. Be natural. And trust yourself. The open up advice is coming from someone who’s judgmental and doesn’t genuinely want to get to know you and invest in the work required. You’ll be too good for them. My piece of advice to INFJs is be true to yourself, be authentic. Develop skills of assertiveness to deal with and say no to the energy vampires or distance yourself from the incorrect people without feeling guilty.

As a young Infj man. I have found myself experiencing all of this a lot through out my life. Going through the things I have. And now hearing all of this. I realize a lot more about myself now. Thank you for this video. It helps quite a lot.

I can totally relate to the all of the above mentioned I learnt from a young age that I would be judged negatively during my life time and we can choose our friends not our family. I've been aware that, I have been judged as burden by a number family member, and that hurts 💔 😕 😔, however, I have proven to myself that, I'm certainly not a burden and can stand up for myself, and know that I'm more than capable of navigating my own cause through life lived experience.

Wow!!! I am really really really impressed how this thing know me. Im impressed, this know my thoughts with 120% of accuracy. In order all the advices were good one by one direct to my life it's like someone knows exactly how I am or the way to see the life or exactly how I react related to the environment fhat I have. Impressed.

The tips are extremely timely and address scarily accurate attributes about myself. It's still shocking to be so seen and understood but I am grateful to be among my people so to speak.

@PSYCH-O

2 жыл бұрын

We love to hear it- thank you for the kind feedback 💙

Tip number 5 really spoke to me... and I'm 64! You're never too old to learn more.

I absolutely love doing things for others that is doing what I like. It's my favorite things to do creates heart smiles. If I can't then there is nothing worth my time

I am so glad I got to know all these things at this stage of my life, my path though not clear but I have a torch to guide me, so grateful for that.

@PSYCH-O

2 жыл бұрын

Love that for you, it will save so much confusion 🙌

There is so much healing in this, I think I am a matured infj.. I value myself more and happier as I grow older now.. I used to attract a lot of friends that are a victim of bullies, and suddenly when I decided to spend more time to myself, they will make me feel so guilty that is was as if my duty to make them feel better .. and I took it as my responsibility.. but not anymore as I grow older..

Currently working on my healing and knowing myself better. I am just amazed at how this entire video and most of the advice in the comments have literally confirmed everything i've been realizing and thinking about lately. It is especially encouraging. Thank you for sharing!

@Clover501

Жыл бұрын

If you don’t mind me asking, what SPECIFICALLY, are you healing from? I’m confused when I see the comments saying “self-love for self-heal,” I don’t get it..I’m an INTP, I like to understand things. Also I won’t judge. I’ll just appreciate the reply. Thank you

I learned a few great lessons, thank you!

As a infj, I feel hughed

This is very accurate. I'm feeling all the dilemmas cited in this video. 😅

thank so much, it’s a lot of help for me as a infj!!!

@PSYCH-O

2 жыл бұрын

Thank YOU for the support! We're so happy to help 🙏

This is really good.

Excellent advice.

Letting us know that we blend in more than we think 😊 and thanks for the heads up about burnout risk when caring for others too much for too long and that we are allowed to choose a quiet work-environment

@Clover501

Жыл бұрын

Hey, if you don’t mind me asking, why do you feel the need to find a quiet work environment? Is it for less distractions? What’s so appealing about working, if you could put it into your own words?

I wish I had known all of this early in life. It ould have saved me a lot of pain and frustration.

always remember that no one is perfect. always accept yourself as imperfect but constantly work towards their goals. the destination is not always be the goal. its the learning path is what is important.i have learned that i generally end up where i am needed if i just follow my instincts. if your looking to make a decision but constantly feeling your mind jump back and forth then that tells you your not ready to make the decision.

I will read into everything to a deep level no matter what I love it I love trying to master my emotions. Take it away from me and I hate life its the loneliest thing ever. That is how I can make others heart smile

Ow...thanks for the advices! ♡

I Just Turned 30 when i realized i was an INFJ The Universe has its ways 🙏💕

Infj dont have no boundaries when it comes to people. The first advice is legit and I've learnt that the hard way and over many years. Cutting out people is the a whole lotta burden off your shoulders. Goddammit point no 3 is too on point. Rumination and excavating the past is a suck. Always trying to understand. Always needing something new because repetitive work is sooo boring. I have put my own needs on the back burner for the entirety of my life. I was never taught to be selfish or take care of myself or my needs. So much so that i dont even know how to ask myself that or know what my needs are. When you don't know what you need and want you tend to be lost in the world constantly searching for purpose and meaning.

@kindGSL

Жыл бұрын

A marriage counselor psychologist told me once that I have "no boundaries." I spent years trying to figure out what the heck she meant. I never have figured it out, I just know it is disqualifying.

@Kate-ms5js

10 ай бұрын

I just learned what boundaries are in the past couple years! It means honoring your own needs, your own energetic space, your own emotional and physical space and telling others where those boundaries are for you. It is very hard in the beginning to start trying to listen to your own, quiet inner voice-often not having heard it since some kind of childhood trauma…But it’s there and it’s worthy. People who know you prob won’t like you setting boundaries; they’ll be shocked and Will project anger onto you. Have a therapist to go to for support and start with small things. It’s Worth it!

I feel overwhelmingly thankful for this. I could almost cry.

@Clover501

Жыл бұрын

Is it really that powerful to be understood? Could it really bring one to tears? I have yet to experience that myself

@mishachilume2628

Жыл бұрын

😂 honestly yes. Imagine being criticized as well as being guilt tripped into being what u are not, by the people around u for the personality traits u just cant shake off. U start to feel like there's something wrong with u. 😂 its a crappy feeling. So this was enlightening to say the least. Put me back in control of my personality.

Tip #2 is what I'm struggling with right now. I'm in therapy for it as well. It's making me depressed

@PSYCH-O

2 жыл бұрын

Therapy can go a long way 💙

As an elder infj, I applaud this video as being spot on! Good work!

@Clover501

Жыл бұрын

Anything else? Also, as an elder INFJ, how has your life been? Do you have any regrets, grandkids, ect? What are your thoughts on them, how do you feel about them? Feel free to go in great detail about your life. I’d love to hear about your adventures in life as they have happened😊, I’m ready to be enlightened

I gave you massive knowledge about me and I have gone very fare into my emotions in life I gave you lots of value from my heart. DO NOT disrespect me and take my info and twist it all around and attack me with it I am always open to listen to the opinion If someone disagree with my ways. That's fine.

I needed this

this is golden, thanx

I consider myself an HSP. I wonder how many infj’s have this same correlation?

It took me a while to get most of these and I am still actively working on all, but that tip 6 Spirit help me.

Wow, that was great! I'm not a young INFJ, I'm a relatively old one. But the advice is still valid at any age.

@Walklikeaduck111

2 жыл бұрын

Yes it is

That last tip… most meaningful to me.

Great advice. 👍 For me, I always ask so many questions whether they are really really in needs because I have learnt the lesson and do not waste my time in the long run because of their enjoy complaining or enjoy the telling the story of suffering. Until the spiritual world push it the next level and they becoming so so confirm. Frankly speaking the spiritual world does look like nearby my side because I ask the question so logically and directly until the unseen spiritual mostly notice of my strong energy vs the weak energy probably the negative and positive energy take place. For religious saying there is when positive energy from the God vs the Evil energy meet. Of course the energy is stronger in the churches or religious places to out perform this task. For me, it is how would the surrounding energy that makes out the outcome. Meaning i play around with the fate and element of desperate it is. While I would always play the safe card because I keep both the outcome in future. Meaning do not expect too ideal due to the energy that need to invest. They have to give the energy also, because it is their problem not mine in the first place. INFJ door slam or ghost them is possibly happen anyway. 👍

Be more selfish! Boom! Learning that if you aren't taking care of yourself; which requires one to focus on oneself, then you will not be able to reach your optimal state, and it turn you will waste energy on the wrong people at the wrong times in the wrong ways. If you can't take care of you how will you sustain helping others. If you see it that way then you aren't being selfish, but instead you want to be at your best for others. You'll get more done in less time in the right ways if you approach your life this way. It "feels" bad to think of oneself, so we think we are doing something wrong; which must mean or is interpreted as being focused on what you want is wrong. The truth is it feels bad or comes with bad feelings because WE AREN'T USED TO IT. It is unfamiliar to us, so we accept the interpretation that allows us to go back to what is EASIER and allows us to feel good about ourselves; which is ACTUALLY SELFISH in a bad way.

pretty awesome ❤

The ideal path is creating a spider web of options leading to a endless supply of opportunities because in life nothing is perfect so being able to change direction of the path to avoid road blocks that will stop you like socializing a major road block. One that can make you go crazy and never return. Myers Briggs is going to have to make a 17 spot

Thank you 🙏

This video arrives just in time to save me from despair

take enough time to recharge and connect within x

Reminding myself what I love to do as a child

I did,you can go now! lol thanks 😊

Not an experienced INFJ but I personally found certain music like "How Deep It Goes" by Heart to be incredibly soothing on the psyche.

I’m more than just an INFJ, I’m a psychic with plenty of traumatic past too, and I bet there’s more to come, waiting for me to clear. I’m not even sure if I’m considered young or old, because I’ve been behaving like a grownup since I was 2 years old. And yes, I do remember very clearly what I was like when I was 2, 3, 4 years old and so on. So, maybe I’m way older than my physical age. Despite having the ability to look into the future, the past, the present, and somebody else’s mind, I can still feel lost, from time to time, not sure if I’ve done everything right. Most people see me as a very wise and knowledgeable person, but I still doubt myself from time to time. I’m not the kind who always think that I’m right. So, whenever people came to me for advice, I’ll always tell them to do their own research and take my advice at your own risk, because I could be wrong.

Thank you I really own u 🥰

what arises in me as I watch this video is just how much pain I'm in... suicidal grief and homicidal rage!! nothing to live for. NOTHING. endless suffering... that's the story of my life. it all seems devastatingly hopeless. HOPELESS. the past rapes and haunts and tortures and torments me... the future paralyzes me with fear. and I only feel overwhelming shame in the present.

@tracyovercomer

2 жыл бұрын

You are validated in your feelings. Is there a way that you can get into therapy and see someone? I’ve recently made this decision and it has helped immensely. It is good to talk out whats transpired in your life. I was in a very dark place and I cried out to Jesus. He rescued me from that pit of despair and then I was able to go from there; seeking extra counsel in therapy.. I’m soo sorry you’re in pain. Hang on..There is hope even if it doesn’t feel like it..

@mandylavell1774

2 жыл бұрын

You are a precious human being and right now you need and deserve support and care.Reach out and keep asking until you have that support.I know how hard and scary it can feel where you are,find people who can help you,you are so important.

My people, I see so many of people like me. I feel like i am in heaven.

Love upgrading myself if I am not pushing myself in educating myself I get bored and depressed

Thank you for this... I'm already 30 and I'm still in my mind, ruminating.

@kindGSL

Жыл бұрын

I recall an older woman I worked with about 40 years ago kept telling me "everyone has pain in their life, but misery is optional." She was trying to tell me ...

@wit7882

Жыл бұрын

@@kindGSL She is right. I'm getting better now, slowly choosing to let go of that misery. Thank you. I hope everyone can have the power to choose and let go.

I am an INFJ and i need help my life. I wasted many many years of my life worrying about others and trying to find about the best time and circumstances to start living my life. Now I feel demotivated, drained , no sense of directions, hate anger and everything else ! I need a life coaching of some kind.

@OGK-1414

4 ай бұрын

I hope you've found what you need. I'm in the same boat. Life is a mess because I was spending all my energy trying to live like and understand others. Now life is half done and I have nothing and never been happy. Any how, good luck.

@tratdagnl8619

4 ай бұрын

@@OGK-1414 you too. hope the future will have something better to offer for the both of us. thank you and stay safe.

I had to take this test for psychology class.. people always call me weird or anti social and that’s a lot harder when you’re younger

Making new friends and getting to know them is like building a building, it takes time n effort n can lead to stress, that's why I don't like makin too many new friends, I prefer 2 or 3 that I can focus on, kinda like picking a main in brawlhalla, its stressful to use random all the time, instead of bein 50% with everyone be 100% with 2 or 3 and dominate every opponent you face

@angieangiel2666

2 жыл бұрын

I haven't made a new friend since 1996. I am 47 and she is 80. I have two online friends I've had for a year now but I've never met them yet

No I make a impact any where I go without saying anything it's the energy I put off. Because I own the ground I stand in the radius of my reach. It's a protection trait. Called myspace

2:15 Man's search for meaning by Viktor Frankl will give you the best answer.

I am very selfish it takes massive amount of time to recharge and learn self improvement. Even though my main reason for is to create heart smiles it is still for me

My wife and I are both INFJs

"You can't pour from an empty pitcher" If you give all of your time and energy to everyone else, you won't have a chance to refill your pitcher, and you won't have anything left to give.