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@TheIntelligentElephant71133

Жыл бұрын

Do the the original remake of king kong from 1986 and the sequel king kong lives i think you’ll find it interesting 👑 🦍

@TheIntelligentElephant71133

Жыл бұрын

And tbh I didn’t think the 1998 american godzilla was that bad I thought is was good, perfect and cool to be awesome 😎 🦖 🤩

@adamofgrayskull7735

Жыл бұрын

Dude you deserve more subs

@dlbarnes

Жыл бұрын

Keep up the excellent work; enjoy your work!!!

@michelleportelli5487

Жыл бұрын

This video is great like dynamite🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🔥🔥🔥🔥🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🔥🔥🔥🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨🧨

I used to subscribe to G-Fan magazine when I was a kid. I wrote in about how bad this movie was, and it annoyed one of the filmmakers/producers enough that he wrote about his displeasure of my review. Not a bad attempt at shitposting in a pre-internet era.

@ZiddersRooFurry

Жыл бұрын

Epic lol

@mrgodzillaraptors8632

Жыл бұрын

That’s pretty poggers

@kurniawanwidisusanto3619

Жыл бұрын

If it shit, it shit. You did the right thing Not all heroes wear a cape or condom

@superdeluxesmell

Жыл бұрын

We stand on the shoulders of giants!

@CaptainRufus

Жыл бұрын

And now G Fan has dumb boomer takes talking about how vaccines are bad and Ronald Reagan was great. I don't get JD Lees at all. I don't think he is from Alberta or that he got a particularly bad strain of BC Bud so I am gonna go with Boomer. Canadians aren't supposed to act like dumb Americans dammit! We Americans are supposed to be dumb Americans!

My friends and I joked that the entire movie was just the main character suffering from a major schizophrenic episode.

@OmicronX-1999

Жыл бұрын

That would have made it way more fun.

@demonkingbadger6689

Жыл бұрын

Well, i have seen movies, where that would actually make the plot make sense.

@benderbendingrodriguez420

Жыл бұрын

It's like that robot chicken sketch where a kid wins a game of checkers, is taken to outer space by aliens as Earth's ultimate champion to defeat another more evil alien race and saves the day. Turns out he was just having a seizure & frothing at the mouth

@yourtimetraveleralara

Жыл бұрын

@@demonkingbadger6689 yeah

@dbsommers1

Жыл бұрын

That does sound better.

Audience: What movie did you make? Charles Band: A Kaiju movie. Audience: How orignal. Charles Band: And with a poor protagonist turned chosen one. Audience: Daring today, aren't we?

@Blackshadow164

11 ай бұрын

Charles Band: with girls with flat butts as supporting characters.

"Postal workers were kind of like the grunge of mass shooters-they had a moment there back in the 90's" rofl Your reviews are some of my favorites on KZread.

@georgeoldsterd8994

Жыл бұрын

They should really make a comeback. 😏

@randybarnett2308

Жыл бұрын

The Ultimate Terrorist --- a Vietnam Veteran who as a civilian now works at the Post Office, whose a bodybuilder on steroids, member of the NRA, just recently converted to Islam.😎

@chrismaynard8600

Жыл бұрын

One of the best lines I've heard

See if I had some tiny fairy type person told me I had to save the world, I wouldn't do shit. Not unless she gets her twin sister and sing a song about how awesome I am. Then I'd go fight a giant lizard monster. Otherwise she can go pound sand

@yourtimetraveleralara

Жыл бұрын

Yeah me too even if i was dreaming!

@AgentofLADON

Жыл бұрын

You just know the scriptwriter watched Mothra but they could only afford one fairy and no song.

@petermmm42

Жыл бұрын

mothra in ebirah Horror of the deep: I only need 639 hours of singing by everybody on infant island and then I will save my own people!

@mzgreenjeansapproves

Жыл бұрын

@@petermmm42 oh yeah they also had a whole dance routine "ooga booga" style. I'm not that much of a diva the twin fairies don't need backup dancers 😜

@ranchosdelnorte

Жыл бұрын

Man, I'm relieved that you only wanted them to sing a song, I was scared that it was heading into a completely different direction when you start off "unless she gets her twin sister"

Zarkorr looks badass! _Somebody should put him in a movie..._

@lipstickzombie4981

Жыл бұрын

I wouldn't mind seeing him featured in a videogame like GigaBash first to test the waters though.

@iforgor8271

Жыл бұрын

@@lipstickzombie4981 wdym by “test the waters”?

@TheKyrix82

Жыл бұрын

I do like the design

@Axolotl_Mischief

Жыл бұрын

@@iforgor8271 well you know how when someone wants to put a giant monster in a movie, they need to make sure he's popular as a videogame character, first?

@bentonmarcum8924

Жыл бұрын

​@@iforgor8271 he lives in. East Palestine

Great she guessed the monster's' hight, now if she can guess it's weight she could win a prize at the county fair

@AgentofLADON

Жыл бұрын

Does it have to be numbers or can we just guess a fuckton?

Any movie that has a giant pencil prop for a tiny person is Academy Awards material.

This whole movie feels like what would happen if you tried to make a 70's era giant monster movie and replaced the Kenny role with a fully grown adult.

A new Brandon video makes any day great. Also, RIP Lemmy. Also, who in the hell is blocking a Zarkorr video?

@JohnSuave

Жыл бұрын

*BLOCKED BY TOHO*

@rubberwoody

Жыл бұрын

Zarkorr

@CD-Gaming

Жыл бұрын

People with taste? So not those behind Power Rangers Mega Force then!

@andrewmarsjr9879

Жыл бұрын

Me too tenold makes me laugh when my day is going bad and he makes it better

@teedup8995

Жыл бұрын

​@@JohnSuaveLol!

Speaking as a big fan of getting scammed out of my money, these Raycon sponsorships everyone's been doing sure have been the best!

@mrcheesemunch

Жыл бұрын

They're actually pretty decent I got some for my birthday a couple years ago, still going strong and I seem to have weird shaped ears but they stay in fine I was not paid to say this God I wish I was, fucking pay me someone!

@benderbendingrodriguez420

Жыл бұрын

My mom uses them & says their acc pretty decent. I have no idea if I can trust her opinion on that considering she can barely work her phone unless it's Facebook or KZread lol

“Someone whose last name is literally Pugh.” IDK Florence Pugh seems to be a pretty good actress.

@robertodell9193

Жыл бұрын

And she's cute too!😁

@benderbendingrodriguez420

Жыл бұрын

Literally first thing I thought lol! She's a fun personality with some good acting range. She was by far the only good part of that shitty Black Widow movie

"Why do you look like a mall tramp?" Best line in the movie

Zarkorr does look like an Ultraman monster-of-the-week, FOR A SINGLE EPISODE OF THE SHOW.

@mrgodzillaraptors8632

Жыл бұрын

Don’t disrespect ultraman like that man, ultra kaiju look waaaay better

@MD_Chaos

Жыл бұрын

That’s like most ultraman monsters though so not the win win statement

@Dr.W.Krueger

11 ай бұрын

@@mrgodzillaraptors8632 you obviously never watched the early Ultraman shows. THAT was some low budget f*ckery.

@mrgodzillaraptors8632

11 ай бұрын

@@Dr.W.Krueger at least their designs are charming and had some creativity. Now days the suits look pretty nice

"Thanks Bimbo fairy." No, Brandon, thank you! I needed the laugh today!

This is one of those occasions where I say "Thank you for watching the movie, Brandon, so that we don't have to."

You know you're in for a good time when Brandon is reviewing a giant monster flick

14:04-14:12 I’m surprised you didn’t mention that it sounds like they used the T-Rex roar from Jurassic Park 🤣

Charles Band tried, but I think at the end of the day, he knew as much about kaiju films as the people behind Tattooed Teenage Alien Fighters from Beverly Hills knew about tokusatsu.

@victorhernandez8723

Жыл бұрын

That show is an embarrassment to super hero shows!

@teedup8995

Жыл бұрын

At least the dark haired girl was hot! ❤

@the-NightStar

Жыл бұрын

@@victorhernandez8723 I find it weird that nobody seems to understand that TTAFfBH was an intentional parody of Power Rangers and was trying to be bad and campy and terrible looking on purpose.

@Dynaman21

Жыл бұрын

@@the-NightStar It was trying to be campy the same way The Room was a black comedy. That was what they had to do when Tsuburaya refused to give them Andro Melos footage and they had no money for anything.

I love how you said "find out after this commercial break... i guess" and the video immediately went to a burger king commercial! 🤣

That Jon Arbuckle joke got me good.

@ConstantineFurman

Жыл бұрын

Right? Solid ref.

Brandon: "Find out after this commercial break... I guess." KZread: "As you wish" and inserts a commercial

4:53 "EVIL NEWS" made me laugh way harder than it should have.

Not just the 1990s there were a number incidents in the 1980s as well.

The Zima reference really got me. That sh*t was everywhere.

How did TOHO not sue the shit out of these guys for using the name Monster Island as their studio name?

I got an add after the commercial break joke, lol 6:25

Everyone's waiting for Godzilla videos, and I'm sitting here silently waiting for Brandon to review "The Yongary Monster From The Deep"

@lipstickzombie4981

Жыл бұрын

Bro, get in line. I'm waiting for that and The X From Outer Space to be featured to complete my kiddie Kaiju memory lane trip.

@DankMothBoi

Жыл бұрын

I’m waiting for him to do Varan The Unbelievable

@nicholaslienandjaja1815

Жыл бұрын

I'm waiting for him to review Garuda, Reptilicus, and The Giant Behemoth.

@yourtimetraveleralara

Жыл бұрын

@@nicholaslienandjaja1815 yeah me too

@yourtimetraveleralara

Жыл бұрын

Mine is reigo. Raiga. And raiga vs ohga! The movies are bad!

I caught this on TUBI last year or to be more honest it caught me as it just automaticly started playing after RobotJox and I couldn't be bothered to find the remote. It staggers me how many of Bands films often have all the ingredients to make a fun cult movie; everyday slub protagonist, big stupid monster, cheap but charming effects yet its always an absolute bore.

@nicolasgarant9124

Жыл бұрын

Even Puppet Master, the movie he's most known for is absolutely carried by its premise and effects, because the plot itself is soooo slow and boring.

Zarkorr was always one of those films I kept meaning to watch as a kaiju film fan but after this, I feel like I dodged a 90's bullet.

When the mental projection of the tiny cut-rate valley girl is the most entertaining part of the movie...

3:55 Tiny Teenage Mall Tramp🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 "WHOA!!!!! That's a great song title!"

A new episode of Brandon’s Cult Movie Reviews beats a bad day any day

Band really does seem to have a thing for tiny stuff. Even including the tiny alien girl in this one as a knock-off of the Mothra twins. If it turned out he had a shrinking fetish, I'm not sure I'd really be surprised.

@pedrovallefin8406

Жыл бұрын

A shrinking fetish? How wold that even work?... You know what, im not sure i wanna know.

The part where the cop goes "Wait, I heard of this, what if he's right?" killed me. Also the hacker guy. Fun little movie.

I remember finding ‘Kraa! The Sea Monster” while scrolling through Amazon looking for cheesy giant monster movies and watched the trailer and thought it seemed boring. I might watch one day…

@Sierlea

Жыл бұрын

That one's actually better. It's not *good*, human and monster scenes remain very disjointed, but the lead characters aren't as unpleasant and it has an Italian alien space clam.

@nicholaslienandjaja1815

Жыл бұрын

Fun fact: The suit for Kraa was later reused as a monster of the week in an episode of Big Bad Beetleborgs.

@moviedudexd5579

Жыл бұрын

@@nicholaslienandjaja1815 Another fun fact: The suit for Kraa ended being up used in a gay porn movie called Knaked Knights.

@SlapstickGenius23

Жыл бұрын

@@moviedudexd5579 The Kraa suit seems really popular with low budget people.

Looking at the tiny hot chick, I keep thinking of the Simpsons episode where Homer is Paul Bunyan, and he keeps asking Marge how her Yoga stretching is going...

@majorgear1021

Жыл бұрын

Finally! Someone else comments on how hot she was.

@bradleyr.6385

Жыл бұрын

She’s hot AF. What’s the actress name?

Brandon Tenold. The Canadian King of Crap. The best film reviewer I know. Thank you good Sir.

@andrewpytko4773

Жыл бұрын

He and Brad Jones should do a something together.

@Sigismund697

Жыл бұрын

not until he defeats Mark from Wierd Movies in single combat

This is the real prequel to the "Postal" games. Hell, this could be the Postal Dude himself!

You've introduced me to so many fun movies. Thanks for being you

What an awesome birthday gift for me, Brandon! Thank you! You’re the best!🎉

"An alien being appeared to me this evening. And she told me that... that I have been chosen to defeat Zarkorr." You're right. This would have been a better movie if it was all in his head.

Fun Fact: 'Shining Time Station' is unknown to Americans. It's a Canadian show. Yes, I know it's Thomas the Tank Engine (I grew up with the show myself), but I don't know why the name change. Maybe a rights issue.

The movie's lighting is so out there I discovered Zarkorr was red in the making of.

"Postal workers were kind of like the grunge mass shooters." That is such a '90s thing to say in the 21st century. Well versed.

Fun fact: 'Zarkorr the Invader' was what I used to call my junk back in high school.

@rvfiasco

Жыл бұрын

Way more effective than "Mr. Wiggly."

"Oh, that's a relief. Tommy was thinking that just 'HIS' life had no meaning." Dude, this is rare form. Funny thing was, I've always been curious about this movie and KRAA, but obviously not curious enough to see if there's a free version of them on youtube. Now, thanks to this video, I don't need to sit thru either movie. Great content!

As a fan of Charles Band, If I had to guess I would say that the monster footage in this movie was done as a proof of concept by somebody he partnered with, and He started filming before he could find out if the person was able to actually deliver more footage. This would kind of track if you have paid attention to his recent activity, there was a movie he put out called giantess attack. The movie was actually done as a indie project by a fan of the general who had it crowd funded along with a sequel that I keep seeing advertisements for but apparently never materialized. Charles band distributed that film, then hired him to do the special effects for attack of the fifty foot cam girl, which did well enough to net a sequel That has been criticized for much of what you say about Zarkorr. He is also going to release the Giantess Attack sequel and it looks like a 3rd is on the horizon. For what it's worth the actresses involved in all of these films seem to really enjoy their part in them and working with him so good for them I. Actually bought the 2 films that are out because I wanted to see the bonus features. , haven't watched them yet but considering most of what you show on this than the average film. I like to watch I don't think I'll be disappointed

Coming soon to Brandon’s Cult Movie Reviews: Kraa the Sea Monster. I can’t wait until he tears up Godzilla’s revenge aka All Monsters Attack.

@nicholaslienandjaja1815

9 күн бұрын

Would like to see him review Pulgasari as well.

12:50 - "He also gives Tommy an Atari Lynx to take with. He doesn't want him to get bored on the plane, after all." - I'm afraid I've got some bad news regarding the Lynx's battery life, then.

I love watching your videos and hearing you talk about renting giant monster movies when you were younger. That’s exactly how I got into Godzilla movies and staying up to catch the late showings on TV. This channel feels like my childhood, and you’re a pretty cool dude. Metal heads forever🤘🏽

Oh yeah I am getting a Power Ranger like cheesy feeling to this film.

13:43 Chef...from South Park...WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE???? Really why is Chef helping the local Sheriff; that part only makes sense in the South Park Halloween special....AHHAHA (>.

Holy crap, i never thought I'd hear about this movie again, it was a rental store curiosity of mine back in the day. Great stuff, Brandon, i got more entertainment out of your review than the movie itself! Like WAY more! XD

Brandon my man you make Canadians proud ! Love your videos, know so many of the movies myself. Do you know what needs a good dose of Brandon humour ? TV & streaming shows :) Would love for you to do series reviews, heck you could keep your flair and only do canceled shows.

8:30 I thought it was just a one-off joke from Seinfeld because of how overwhelming Newman’s job at the Post Office was.

" Or just find the back zipper and pull the suit actor out." Love those one liners Brandon.

6:26 “youll find out after this commercial break?” (Advert)

6:20 Brandon: Um, find out after this commercial break… I guess. KZread: (plays ad). The timing of that ad break was PERFECT! 👌😂. (For once)

2:48 Always appreciate a Shining Time Station reference

"I can't wait to see them recite the ABC's backwards in real time" Me - CBA... Nailed it.

Have you ever thought about reviewing Pulgasari? It has a very interesting production story with the director being kidnapped

@SlapstickGenius23

Жыл бұрын

Yup, the NK retelling of a lost South Korean film based on a folktale.

When you next update your Bottom 10 Movies list, Starcrash 2 and War of the Robots are going to have some stiff competition! This was one of the most agonizingly painful movies I've ever sat through! It makes Things look like a legitimately good movie!

Oh boy, flood of memories just rushed back into my mind, I watched that movie when I was a kid.

Hey Brandon. Was a subscriber back on the old channel that got deleted and was even a friend on Google plus when that was a fucking thing. It's always good to see when you upload a review of an unhinged movie. Keep it up bud.

I do love a giant monster with big horns, the bigger the better in my book

That's really saying something when the best thing about this movie is at the end credits 😂 Thanks for posting this Brandon, made my day !

Tiny Teenage Mall Tramp. 😂👍

Name a better duo than Brandon & B-Grade Kaiju flicks

Zarkorr is a cool ass monster design with a great soundtrack.

Love Brandon's tee-shirt Hawkwind....Lemmy's og band! Brandon has ALOT of great shirts...lol!!

10:02 - So it is like the 2014 Godzilla, then, just show the attack via a radio or TV then cut away.

I cant believe there were no slo-mo shots to pad the run time even more

After these attempts by Full Moon to try something like Godzilla, you might want to watch their attempt at the time to build something like the MCU. Because I read that their films Mandroid, The Chronicles of Benjamin Knight and Dark Angel were supposed to be set in the same universe. And there were probably plans to form a team out of these. So the B-movie version, of The Avengers ("The B-vengers" so to speak).

On one hand: It's good to know this exists? On the other hand: Brandon's review is the only way I'm going to see any of it.

Lol. I remember the whole postal worker thing from the 90s. Phew, the 90s...make me miss the 80s

How much more 90s could this be? Zarcore U Know The Score. Nice Hawkwind t-shirt.

@7:46 who else immediately thought of Sinbad from jingle all the way in that radio station scene where he says I'm a post tow worker and this is a bomb in a present

The Simpsons has a joke where Flanders dreams of shooting random people & the postal worker is the only 1 who fights back.

You’re a classic brother. I’m glad you’ve been around as long as you have been and kept up giving us great content 👍

I vaguely remember seeing this movie. Apparently, it was so bad I buried it in my subconscious, and watching your review of it brought it back to the forefront of my brain. Yeah, thanks for that!

I love the woman in the back seat…just kept rolling her eyes 😅

I remember seeing this on tv when I was a kid. Never knew the name. Tried to look it up a few years ago but google didn't understand "man kills monster with a reflective shield".

Fun fact,the largest animal is the blue whale, about 98 feet long with a weight of 190 tons. It is the longest animal to ever exist though the protowhale P Colossus of the genus Perucetus may of weighed up to 340 tons.

@4:24 "you are exactly in the center" oh so like the guy in Idiocracy, I can see the resemblance. xD

"You know you're in trouble when the movie stars someone whose last name is literally Pugh." Hey! Florence Pugh takes offense at that. 😛

I had been trying to find this movie for years now! All I could remember was the laser beams and the shield at the end! Thanks Brandon!

I really like "BAD CHANNELS". My nick-name for the film is "WKRP Invaded by Space Aliens". And Martha Quinn was so cute back then!

Back in the day there was either a mug or a cartoon going around with a smiling postman image from the 1950s or 60s. IIRC, it read, I'm a postal worker and I'm disgruntled.

Thanks for finding a way to get this uploaded. Don't mind the zoomed in shots at all if it means we get the vid. Also who the heck is worried about this movie being pirated? lol

I watched this a couple of years ago and loved it at first, but it quickly went down the drain. lol I still love how that girl says “sword.” 😂

16:05 i nearly spilled my drink hearing this

Lemmy + naked woman, and guitars = Hawkwind

Personally I've always had a soft spot for the Prehysteria series cause stop motion dinosaurs. This I'm glad I missed.

Do a review on the Black Devil Doll franchise. It's so funny and perfect for a review.

Zarkorr looks like he could be a cool Zoanoid for Guyver to fight.

@jaydugger3291

Жыл бұрын

Was thinking that myself. Guyver is so underappreciated.

@kidprime6863

7 ай бұрын

I was thinking the same thing

@nicholaslienandjaja1815

9 күн бұрын

Zarkorr looks like a hybrid of Gomora and Arstron.

@jamiehorton9958

8 күн бұрын

I had to Google those... sadly, I know very little about Ultraman. That said, I had a few of the toys growing up (I thought they were just Godzilla toys) and I very much enjoyed Shin Ultraman in theaters.

I first heard of this Charles Band Godzilla knock-off from the Angry Video Game Nerd.

The Atari Lynx absolutely wrecked this movies budget.

ZARKORR! THE INVADER When an ordinary man takes an immovable object to do an almost dangerous thing.