I'm just like you with funny cat and dog videos to destress

Funnily enough for someone with demand avoidance, having a checklist for meltdown recovery is yet another demand 😂. I literally need to do nothing until I feel like I want to do something, whatever that may be. That's my sign that I'm becoming a person again

The comedian Fern Brady talks in her comedy show about being autistic about how she used to constantly destroy her furniture after every demanding experience like being on tour and stuff. When she was finally diagnosed she realised those were meltdowns. It was the first time I heard someone speak about meltdowns in that way and made me open up and start talking about an experience I had my whole life. It helped a lot with reducing the shame and guilt and generally having way fewer meltdowns because I started understanding myself better (I'm also late diagnosed)

This was very helpful! Also very validating having these different perspectives!

This was INCREDIBLE! Thank you. Very well articulated, and I felt so seen! When I have a meltdown, I can't do anything.I just need to lie in my bed and try and nap it off. I get very negative thought spirals which do not go away until I've slept. The 'pit of despair' is so entrenching mid-meltdown, it feels like it'll never end. A horrible experience

When I am experiencing a situation that causes me anxiety and stress I tend to isolate myself as I feel there is no one that can understand what am I going through and I sometimes struggle to communicate things. I think this stems from me trying to explain to others what I have been struggling with however it had not been acknowledged properly. So I think for us autistic people, it is important having people there that we can feel comfortable expressing ourselves to without feeling judged or inadequate. It is also important to stay away from unhealthy coping mechanisms during meltdowns.

Having meltdowns in the mental health system led to me being misdiagnosed with BPD for a while. And shamed. I never hit anyone. I just cried, yelled or both. But it was misunderstood. And I couldn't understand why I couldn't make more progress. It was a relief to find out that I was autistic instead of just a bad mental patient. I am mentally ill and autistic. But I was only being treated for half of the problem because they didn't know that I was autistic. Then I was blamed for not making more progress.

@lakritzeslena

3 ай бұрын

That's what happened for me too, and, here in Germany, once BPD is diagnosed no one gives a s... If one really has it. It's just a good box to put unclear, unregulated people into. I got my BPD diagnosis at 15, and then, when I was 39 I got my ADHD diagnosis. But at the moment getting assessed for autism is near impossible, so I have to give myself the understanding myself)

@Catlily5

3 ай бұрын

@@lakritzeslena Sorry you had to go through that.

@LiliVillage

Ай бұрын

​​@@lakritzeslenaIm thinking of moving to Germany because where I live is really really bad and theres zero help or benefits for autism, ADHD or any mental illness. You either sink or swim. You said you're having a hard time getting an autism assessment. Is it possible it might be harder for someone whos an immigrant?

@lakritzeslena

Ай бұрын

@@LiliVillage it would be very hard to get an assessment, and help and support for autistic adults and ADHD is also very sparse. Most practitioners think it's made up, or just a kids issue. And both autism and ADHD in women- even harder. I don't want to discourage you, but for me it was such a let down when I finally got my diagnosis and then, no one felt they could help me.

@LiliVillage

Ай бұрын

@@lakritzeslena Sorry you had to go through all this. I'm sure you're right, although I have to argue that it's really not much better where I come from, even worse because people here are very poor and suffer from scarcity mindset. If you dont have family keeping you safe, you have to work god awful jobs to keep yourself afloat. I can't work any office jobs or stable jobs because those are very sparse and moving to the big city is nearly impossible without support. I'm basically left to rot and no prospects of things ever getting better.

Excellent questions and a great discussion. Thank you Ella and everyone for delving beyond the first few layers and discussing this from an insightful position.

Helpful video thank you for making it

That's the best video about meltdowns I have watched so far!!

Very well spoken!

Whilst this video is interesting, my grandson is autistic and has adhd. His aggressive outburts are increasing at a scary rate, and so what I'd like is a video on how to manage these outbursts. Whilst I realise that the need to regulate is important, when he's punching and biting, where is the line drawn? My grandson is also non-verbal and so can't express what the trigger is, which only adds to the outburst I imagine 😢 but I worry about the outcome as he gets bigger and stronger. I'd really welcome constructive comments, advice, and / or help, please.

hi there! i love y'all's channel. i saw that y'all had a video on how to help an autistic child with eating challenges, but i was wondering if y'all would be interested in making one about adults with eating challenges too. in this case, i'm referring to sensory sensitivities, like texture, appearance, food touching each other, etc., and not restrictive eating disorders. it would be helpful for me to get insight on that experience from other autistics, because a lot of food related topics on here regarding autism are more restricting related. or by accounts that still use the term aspie/asperger's, which i'm not really a fan of. anyway, just food (haha) for thought! thanks