The last guy kept it 💯

@gmanlee575

Жыл бұрын

So in western terminology being FAKE

@blaackberry

Жыл бұрын

Fully, and its an important thing to know!

@blaackberry

Жыл бұрын

​@@gmanlee575 I think its like how they say west coast people are nice but not kind and east coast people are not nice but very kind. Japanese people would be the west coasters nice on the surface but not necessarily on the inside.

@multistan9650

Жыл бұрын

@@blaackberry I’d like to think us east coasters are nice, but I’ve only visited the major cities a handful of times

@wayababaya

Жыл бұрын

yes

People can be polite ... but their innerself just shouting "F*CK"

@asianprince8718

Жыл бұрын

Jamie, have you been to Japan?

@ohcrapitsmrG

Жыл бұрын

I think most people can be that way.

@asianprince8718

Жыл бұрын

​@@ohcrapitsmrG Do you mean like forced behaviors ?

@AA123TD

Жыл бұрын

They keep it to themselves and I respect that. It keeps society harmonious.

@krynnyth

Жыл бұрын

​@@asianprince8718 I'm in Japan It's exactly like this Lmao

The chick who pointed out there's a difference between being polite and being friendly nailed it

@bingobongo1615

Жыл бұрын

It is but Japanese people also tend to misinterpret friendliness as being kind… just because someone is friendly on interaction doesn’t mean they have your best interest in mind. Having been on business trips to many countries in the world I’d say people int he Middle East are incredibly friendly (much more so than even Americans) but not really Kind at all while Eastern Europeans are not friendly at all but may surprise you with kindness when you need help.

@amanturovic7287

Жыл бұрын

Don't say c word in Japan

@f_u_youtube_69

Жыл бұрын

​@@amanturovic7287 chick chick chick

@Ser3456

Жыл бұрын

@@bingobongo1615 I always found the Middle Eastern people the most kind and helping when you need anything. May be it has been a different experience for you because you were there for business purposes or to only to certain countries.

@HatetheNewNameUpdate

Жыл бұрын

Saying Chick is cringe af

When I went study abroad in Japan, my sensai have to tell me that subtle things tell you if they don't like you. There are so many little things that I just asked "why can't we just be direct and forget these stupid rules?" And he answered "that's why I like teaching you foreigners than Japanese, you are easier to understand."

@mamamememoo

Жыл бұрын

What subtle things pls? 😮

@VllEE

Жыл бұрын

Subtle things like? 😮

@Shiro_Sora

Жыл бұрын

Basically foreigners are more transparent therefore easy to read. (is what I’m getting at here)

@bansheeeierkuchenkiller

Жыл бұрын

I'd love to know the subtle signs, too :)

@mesa577

Жыл бұрын

​@@bansheeeierkuchenkiller when they only say or point out positive things but they do it out of proportion, example my cousins are japanese i tried speaking japanese to them so they can correct me but they just keep praising my japanese.

I like how the last guy was so upfront and honest about this. So essentially many (not all) Japanese tend to be polite outwardly, but internally (how they actually feel) is not necessarily that.

@aud7593

Жыл бұрын

sounds a bit like working in service, but at a societal/cultural wide level. at least i recognise that very much as a barista

@tusla6889

Жыл бұрын

I mean Japanese people are humans at the end of the day like the rest of us

@serenity_in_reverie

Жыл бұрын

yup. thats how honne-tattemae works. polite outward but could be a whole different thing inside.

@123zachstar

Жыл бұрын

That is legit what Americans do too tho. I’m the US, we sugarcoat everything and anything said bluntly is seen as rude, and it’s pretty much only Japan, Australia and the US that are like this. No other country finds truthfulness or bluntness rude like the US does.

@blaackberry

Жыл бұрын

​@@123zachstar You ever been to the east coast 😂 thats all we do. We can be blunt, honest and even rude but usually we look out for each other and are generally nice people when you get to know us

I think people underestimate how impactful even surface level politeness can be. Where I'm from people are so rude and will legit be screaming at you and even if it's not directed towards you when you're out it can easily spoil your mood. On the other hand if someone is being nice even on the surface it can make your whole day better

@maxi0613

Жыл бұрын

@@mikeysmoooth5322 yeah they'll excuse their rudeness by saying I'm being real etc etc

@ms.chuisin7727

Жыл бұрын

When you forced yourself to be too polite, the impact to yourself could be very damaging too so it's good to balance everything out.

@BOC2184

Жыл бұрын

@@ms.chuisin7727being too polite and nice can never damage you , if it does then your already a damaged person on the inside and that’s why it bothers you to be nice.

@ms.chuisin7727

Жыл бұрын

@@BOC2184 You never work in retails🤣

@ms.chuisin7727

Жыл бұрын

@@BOC2184 Or you're the exact kind of person people work in retail had to put up with

I love how honest and aware they are: yea, we're polite, but we don't mean it 😂

@cglunleashed5325

Жыл бұрын

Its like reverse Birmingham

@BSenta

Жыл бұрын

You do this in the corporate office. You act poltite, don't ridicule idiots eg anti-vax moron and stay out of politics because it creates drama and can only harm your career progression. But japanese behave like this with everyone... It's just political correctness for every day life. Personally i prefer this over dealing with karens and crazy people that go nuts of nothing

@franko8572

Жыл бұрын

@@cglunleashed5325Hello, Sonic The Hedgehog! 🦔 🦌

@nads7290

Жыл бұрын

Lol the tsk tho hahah

@User_37821

Жыл бұрын

Avatar on the outside and a monster on the inside Be careful!

Honestly, I prefer a stranger to be polite but not mean it, over someone in NYC who will spit in your face AND mean it. 😂

@arbaz9628

Жыл бұрын

😂😂

@deearr7787

Жыл бұрын

agree. In filipino culture, we have this word "pakitang tao" what you said is exactly what it means.

@happyperson4038

Жыл бұрын

Wait really😭

@khudija9825

Жыл бұрын

I'll have to disagree. I'm from NY, and people here can be rude, but there are nice people who mean what they say even if they say it in a rude manner.

@CT-gl2zj

Жыл бұрын

Lol. We thought we were somehow going to miss the last bus of the night just because we were only looking at one route. We managed to catch a different bus but this one required a pre-purchased ticket and didn't generally take cash like the other one. Driver was PISSED but took our money anyway because apparently he could. We got to our destination and just thanked him happily because we were actually glad we made it. I think he hated us more for that. XD

But there’s definitely a national awareness of their image and how they’re seen by others. Case in point is the Japanese spectators cleaning the stadium after the games. No other people do that! It’s very considerate of them!

@asianprince8718

Жыл бұрын

Actually a lot of people do pick up the trash after the events don't they?

@sari9645

Жыл бұрын

@@asianprince8718 not in the United States!

@FriedToast

Жыл бұрын

Image is the right word. Because they certainly aren't coming to pick up trash in the rivers around my place. I've collected bags and bags and bags of trash from the river next to my place in Sendai. Why don't they show that on TV? Oh, a foreigner cleaning up after filthy Japanese people. I'm not saying all Japanese people are filthy. Not at all! Rather that there *are* filthy Japanese people and the news never balances out the rose-colored glasses news, so people who've never been here think it's some sort of paradise.

@umabharati9251

Жыл бұрын

​@@asianprince8718 not in India either 😂

@ren9143

Жыл бұрын

I guess that depends on individuals. I, for one, wouldn't be leaving Trash around.

For those of you who are interested in Japanese culture and or are currently learning the language on top of the culture; understand that this difference that they're referring to, especially the guy at the end, is the difference between what's called 本音 and 建て前. 本音 = their true feelings, what they really feel and what they really think, their real opinion. It's them being true and honest. 建て前 = not their true feelings, but how they'll act instead in order to appear understanding or to keep the peace, or to not have even the slightest touch of a differing opinion, which may appear to someone as "contentious" and "bad" for feeling or thinking differently. It's an act and practice of deception and dishonesty that is socially acceptable because they culturally feel that it's a kind of social virtue to not say how you truly feel or share your true opinion, especially if it's different than the opinions of other people. In Japanese culture, conformity is seen as a social virtue that they believe contributes to societal peace. This way of thinking causes many people with depression to suffer endlessly, and alone because they don't want people to know due to fear of what others may think. Remember that Japan also has one of the highest suicide rates in the world and culture in the social context is definitely one contributing factor.

@rjbourgeois5490

Жыл бұрын

Makes sense. Most cultures whom have been subjugated think like this. It's a survival mechanism, but it shows how weak of a populace they are. Just being honest. It's also why most don't challenge/go againgst their governing officials for what they know to be true, virtuous, and right. They've been pacified to accept whatever hardships are placed on them and have been indoctrinated into not questioning it at least outwardly. Then again, this goes for every culture in some form or another. Pacification has slowly dropped in to about every society from the "elites" whom fancy themselves to rule from the shadows. If you can't speak your true thoughts (especially if you've been conditioned not to), you are in no better off a position than a slave. It was intentionally instilled. They subconsciously know this, hence why their work/life "balance" drives them to the brink. They will literally work themselves to death to whom they are presented to as their "superiors". It's sad but the only way to stop the cycle is to break from the "cultural norms" they subject themselves to, starting with not being two faced. They only harm themselves by doing so in the long run.

@iatsd

Жыл бұрын

The fact that you point to depression and suicide rates in Japan indicates that you don't have the fainest clue what you're talking about. Attitudes towards suicide vary by culture. It is a big thing in most Judeo-Christian cultures, but it is simply not the same in Japan. Suicide is less socially stigmatised. Linking depression in Japan and suicide rates there is simply lazy and ignorantly misleading. Almost as lazy and arrogant as not providing a Hepburn translation of the kanji used.

@beethao9380

Жыл бұрын

kind of like racists in the US. Racists, but try to hide it and can live amongst everyone like the KKK.

@prashantgurung2635

Жыл бұрын

Japan does'nt have high suicides its korea literally USA ranks higher in suicides than japan

@user-jm2pk9bh8m

7 ай бұрын

間違いない。正解過ぎる

The Japanese have a high-context type of communication making them verbally indirect. It is essential to understand this between cultures.

@Pheelyp

Жыл бұрын

This is an insightful comment. Thank you.

@nads7290

Жыл бұрын

Hmm with how the words work isn't used that much. Mostly informal so it seemed like indirect

@Idkwhatever93948

Жыл бұрын

Sounds like pain if you asked me. I don’t see how being indirect considered polite

@joshescobar6043

Жыл бұрын

✔️

@boredfangerrude

Жыл бұрын

English has a lot of context in communicarion as well, not all the time but often but it seems overlooked.

“ if they understood our mentality then they’d know we don’t mean it “

One woman describing Westerners as "friendly" in opposition to Japanese people being "polite" is so apt! Those both seem like positive words but they show a key cultural difference. Americans especially greet every person as if they're equals and are about to make a friend, but that is not the case in many other cultures. Americans' willingness to treat everyone they meet as a potential friend right from the first greeting is why they see politeness as either fake or a shocking cultural difference, as it acts as a wall blocking off that potential connection.

@rosethorn0232

Жыл бұрын

Well put. Americans tend to have their guard down or keep it pretty low most of the time. People in Asian countries like Japan or Korea likely view everyone else as competition in one sense or another which is why they are polite only and stay more guarded.

@jiminswriter4209

Жыл бұрын

@@rosethorn0232 Not necessarily.

@SOA_yt

Жыл бұрын

Yes this is so true. I like to compare America with Starbucks, like the level of friendliness with strangers was such a shock to me, who's an introvert.

@Hotcheetos777

Жыл бұрын

@@rosethorn0232 I'd say Korea, or Seoul to be exact, is actually more like New York, and Japan more like the midwest. Although ig tokyo could be like NY with it being a busy city, but they still upkeep the "politeness". Also as a korean, people here don't view everyone they see as competition. They.....honestly just don't give a fck lol. People are just tired and sick of working, and waiting to get home. It's just a cultural difference. It's weird to greet a stranger because well, they're strangers. It's the same in the east coast (U.S). Greeting and smiling at strangers only happens in the midwest. If you go to the countryside in korea ig it would be more like the midwest in the U.S.

@graceonfilmsnstuff

Жыл бұрын

esp new Yorkers. tbh, I'd rather take an impolite but real friendship over insincere polite one. however, as a mob, I'd rather see japanese level considerte nature

There are subtle (and not so subtle) differences between politeness, courtesy, friendliness, respect, and true kindness.

But please note that people who are always polite will never let you know how much they hate you Polite and kind are different

@Nari_Trovi

Жыл бұрын

yeah, still better to have polite people instead of rude people, though I hate that it makes all gestured questionable

@pelrythm6249

Жыл бұрын

People should stop mistaking rudeness as honesty you can be polite with someone without loving the person it just means that although you are not close to the person you still have the decency to act maturely. Politeness is only used for people you are not close to so please being rude while using honesty as an excuse is stupid

@Nari_Trovi

Жыл бұрын

@@wednesdayaddamss-jc6jn well personally I was talking about how people are with strangers, not close people. I'm not sure about the rest but I assume they are talking about with strangers too

@marikkelaszlo3355

Жыл бұрын

@Wednesday Addamss true, I got too polite in my friendships out of fear of offending them and we grew apart cause our convos were always so dry and the same so now I learned to be more honest with my online friends and told myself it’s okay to have disagreements but don’t be so stiff or people might get scared/shy around you

@Chuiboo

Жыл бұрын

@@pelrythm6249…and people should stop mistaking honesty for rudeness or presumptuousness as well.

I dunno. Meanwhile in NY *Bumps shoulder accidently* "What the F**K, man?! What? What? You f**king wanna a piece of me?"

@TheDive99

Жыл бұрын

"When keeping it real goes wrong."

@rwill156

Жыл бұрын

"I'm walking here!"

@vzgsxr

11 ай бұрын

You's gonna be sleepin with the fishes pal.

@BabyBugBug

9 ай бұрын

I’m a NYer and we don’t do that. The most NY thing to do in that situation is to act like it didn’t happen and don’t move unless the other person shows that he’s acknowledging you by moving slightly.

The amount of Japanese who complimented my Japanese speaking skill is A LOT and let me tell you, I sound like an idiot so I know not to take their compliments at face value 😂

@Airisu_01

Жыл бұрын

Every time I get 上手ed, I know I messed something up. :')

@injanhoi1

Жыл бұрын

Correct. For the most part if they keep complimenting, it means your Japanese needs improvement. Once they stop it means your Japanese has improved and is good. If they say tanno (competent) it can't be bad. It has to be good. That is a direct evaluation of your skill.

@ReimuHakurei-itch.io-

Жыл бұрын

私は国語の上手に出るあなた。 People who get じょうずed a lot are the people who use words incorrectly and are not 上手 enough to differentiate between Kanji readings and meanings in relation to Kanji readings.

@pidgeongguk8818

Жыл бұрын

@@ReimuHakurei-itch.io- Uhh my dude, you might wanna get your own sentence right first before telling others who gets and doesn't get 上手ed

@ReimuHakurei-itch.io-

Жыл бұрын

@@pidgeongguk8818 I will edit my comment and turn my unallocated Hiragana reading into a Kanji Compound ( it will certainly confuse you)

But I still like Japanese grace. Polite on the surface level, so what? Many people from other parts of the world cannot even be bothered with being polite on surface level. Rude and crass

@commentarytalk1446

Жыл бұрын

Exactly, an old English adage we used to teach children: "Respect for ourselves guides our morals, respect for others guides our manners."

@thesaucecollector8921

Жыл бұрын

So you want them to lie to you?

@kendivedmakarig215

Жыл бұрын

Japanese people are only polite on the outside but rude on the inside. They are mostly two faced people

@dundun7198

Жыл бұрын

​@@thesaucecollector8921 Well that is definitely better. Like why would I want someone to treat me like trash? Specially if it is a stranger Of course if it is a close friend is better to be honest, but for the rest of the people I would happily take a lie and a fake smile instead of insults and a bad attitude.

@ryerye6587

Жыл бұрын

​@@thesaucecollector8921 are you an id10t? How is being polite to someone lying to them?

I think that's the nature of politeness though, insincerity. That's why there's the expression, "I was just being polite"

I was in Japan last month, so the embarrassment of this is fresh. The last guy in the video is 100% correct, and I picked this up when I was checking out at a store in Kyoto. I misunderstood the cashier asking me if I needed a bag as "Do you want tax free?" I said no tax-free but then was confused when I paid, and she didn't bag up my items... I asked if she could bag my items and she kept smiling and nodded, but for a split second I saw that rage in her eyes that screamed "idiot dumbass foreigners" before she checked me out for a plastic bag and gently handed it to me. And I shamefully bagged the items myself cause the body language said "Do it yourself" and I wanted to escape the polite yet wrathful gaze 😅 That smacked the rose colored glasses off my face. Doesn't matter where you are in the world. Humans are humans, and we all experience the same complex emotions below the surface of a polite smile 🤣

@valhatan3907

Жыл бұрын

That is so awkward 😂 I can feel the cashier's anger radiates toward me

@Oyuki-Mayonesa

Жыл бұрын

Lol 😂

@muchanadziko6378

Жыл бұрын

Why should the cashier be packing your items? It’s obvious you are supposed to do it yourself The cashier has other people to attend to, he/She’s finished with you after you pay

@nothere3982

Жыл бұрын

Awe c'mon it's not even something to be so mad. She probably had a bad day, it's all right bro you're cool!

@nothere3982

Жыл бұрын

@@muchanadziko6378 i many places the cashier will pack them for you, but depends where you are tho

I mean, being polite and diplomatic to strangers, esp tourist from abroad is basic manner though. Ofc we want to look good, isn't that normal? Why do we need to show our inner self to strangers, what we really thingking is ours to keep.

@commentarytalk1446

Жыл бұрын

I agree. Imho language plays a part: In French they still have the "Vous" et "Tu" forms to denote politeness. Sadly this has long gone from most English in use and as such people speak English and don't THINK about how to be more polite in their approach or more official in their tone anymore. The news corps are such a bad example (I mean good eg of course) of this sloppy slide in behavioural standards.

@Mibs-Mibby

Жыл бұрын

Honestly this is me everytime I work at my customer service job. I don’t want to take my anger out on a random customer.

@vacafuega

Жыл бұрын

​@@commentarytalk1446 as a french person i think you don't know what you're wishing for. The whole tu/vous thing is incredibly tiring to deal with and in the end it's more used a tool to enforce social hierarchy than to express any kind of genuine respect

@commentarytalk1446

Жыл бұрын

@@vacafuega I do. I worked in the army where rank and clear forms of address made the whole organization "work and play" a lot better together. Instead with "over-familiarity" in the West the levels of disrespect are out of control. One of my last jobs was working as a teacher in a school and the sheer disrespect the teachers have to put up, along with abuse from students and even sometimes other staff is ridiculous: It's as if no-one has any idea how to behave. I can't say for sure about French with Vous et Tu as I don't speak the language (My brother is fluent in French however), but I do know in Japan the Honorific way of behaving always seems over-bearing for the younger generation until they grow a bit older and become more responsible and then it begins to make sense and provide some clarity to how people act. That's my opinion from experience and I've been at both ends of it.

@nothere3982

Жыл бұрын

If you never show how you are, you'll never trust anyone neither.

Honesty has immense value 😊

The last guys words are so important! There was a guy in the comments of another video who said that he had bad experiences with Japanese people and everyone was saying that a quote he gave wasnt mean but he knew that it was a surface comment not her true feelings and that she was basically telling him to go back to his country and was understandably upset. Its important to understand the ENTIRE situation not just words at face value. Not all Japanese people are this way though so dont generalize. (She said something like "safe travels" but it was in a way that was more like "get home well" thats used for when someone is leaving your home and youre staying. They were out in public and on opposite sides of the street so not necessarily appropriate which tipped him off)

For those who don’t understand, Japanese simply just don’t want to bother you. America on the other hand, we’re more transparent. Here, we take that as being fake, when in reality Japanese aren’t intentionally insinuating they get along with you.

Japanese are complete opposite of the Dutch in this way. The Dutch are direct and straightforward, and you can take what they say at face value. The Dutch value facts over feelings, and Japanese value other’s feelings over facts. I consider being honest and truthful true politeness, not saying something just to be polite.

@marcusbrown188

Жыл бұрын

That’s why I think Dutch are funny

@clover5923

Жыл бұрын

Yep, so true. I have Dutch friends, they are very honest and direct. Sometimes it shocks me as I am asian, but it is also nice to hear this.

@nomad7060

Жыл бұрын

Middle class english are exactly the same as the japanese. Fake politeness, never saying what you think

@kaylapounds1359

Жыл бұрын

I think it's gotta be middle ground. It's okay to value facts more, but you have to take the feelings in the moment into consideration. Like you can't go to a funeral and tell a grieving person "everybody dies, you gotta get over it."

@LaurelWest

Жыл бұрын

As a Dutch woman, I can confirm we are direct 😂 It's not to be rude, it's just to make communication easier. However, I think every culture has people who act "fake". I've met too many people who would act nice and polite to your face, but drop the mask as soon as you're gone, saying rude things behind your back. I'm also very shy and insecure, and thus I find it hard to directly say 'no' to some things. Depending on the situation and the person, I really feel the need to explain why I recline something. This is why I am so interested in learning about culture as well. Even though a country has a certain way of doing things (or a stereotype) there will always be people who deviate from it

There is a difference between genuine kindness and the appearance of kindness

@ballsgaming6652

Жыл бұрын

If someone that knows nothing about you is polite to you, it’s appearance of kindness.

@maegalroammis6020

6 ай бұрын

Japanese people are so indirectly rude and racist. Only few Japanese are genuinely nice and good-hearted. I’ve had a very bad experience in them, with the toxic lying and hypocritical culture. Worst country to socializing.

just remember when japanese said "you look kind" they're just too nice to call you ugly to your face.

@faith9224

Жыл бұрын

😅😅😅

@cta142

Жыл бұрын

What? I'm Japanese but I have never heard of that

@Shtickyaight

9 ай бұрын

Damm

@hetariagj

6 ай бұрын

​@@cta142何も褒めることないときに使う、とは聞いたことある。使ったことないけど

@maegalroammis6020

6 ай бұрын

Japanese people are so indirectly rude and racist. Only few Japanese are genuinely nice and good-hearted. I’ve had a very bad experience in them, with the toxic lying and hypocritical culture. Worst country to socializing.

Because of following the rules of society, many Japanese people are very polite. Important to understand is, that politeness doesn't equal being nice or friendly.

No people are not always polite in Japan. In REAL LIFE they can actually be pretty rude and obnoxious. My wife is Japanese and works in big store. She experiences rude behaviour from Japanese people every single day. Sometime I am shocked by the things she tells me. Never mind passive aggression and micro aggression from staff and management which is a huge problem in Japan - but on the face of it all, they are all wonderful 😉 And of course, I am a foreigner, so they wouldn’t dare be rude to my face…but behind my back well…But hey, it’s the same wherever you go 😉.

The last woman (the one who was talking about friendliness) is genuinely the most beautiful woman I've ever seen in my entire life, what a goddes

@slamdunktiger

Жыл бұрын

I KNOW RIGHT?!?!%?!@?#%?%? I'm kinda tripping.

@rishabh9788

Жыл бұрын

@@slamdunktiger she kinda reminds me of dahyun from twice

@slamdunktiger

Жыл бұрын

@@rishabh9788 Not sure who that is...looking her up...wow. Yea. I like the more reserved cute kind of beauty. Like..less raw sexual hotness. Having a kind soul that shows through and amazing facial symmetry/nice features helps lol.

Seems like people are easy to mistake politeness to kindness.

@injanhoi1

Жыл бұрын

Yep that sums it up perfectly!

Japanese people love Hawaii and I saw so many there touring and passed by so many going places and on tours and in my experience honestly even if I say hello to them they look past you or won’t look at you at all and rush along like they are to busy and don’t like foreigners. I can chat to anyone from every country and even to the homeless but a Japanese person will not speak for any reason and seems so snobby. The nicest people are in the Philippines 🇵🇭 hands down my absolute favorite country I have ever been to.

@mhan6648

7 ай бұрын

I think some people are a bit shy or afraid to strike up a conversation with English native speakers. But we non-native speakers have no problem making conversation with each other 😂 I do agree Philippino people are very friendly.

The "Salaryman "word is just so cute .😂😂

"We aren't kind we are just hypocrites".

@ohcrapitsmrG

Жыл бұрын

most people are

@discursion

Жыл бұрын

When it comes down to it, what does being a hypocrite even means? As I see it, “lying” not only takes different forms, but it is a spectrum. You’re not “a hypocrite” because you hold back what you really think by being polite. Some people and some cultures would say that not being “hypocritical” by our standards is a form of selfishness by theirs.

@GMAV3RICK

Жыл бұрын

@@discursion If you hold back your feelings and are pretending that makes you a Hypocrite. For you to sit up here and try and defend that crap is laughable 😂

@Al-waqwaq

Жыл бұрын

その通り！

@jisookruzat

Жыл бұрын

​@@GMAV3RICKcould be. But it could also be because society is expected you to only act a certain way and be harmonious. So long as you don't claim to have that high values but only conform to it for some reason

I think the last guy and the last lady in the video were trying to say about Honne-Tatemae, a behaviour that sometimes made foreigners confused... Either being relieved for that or disappointed for knowing the truth behind

The girl speaking with her mother ❤❤❤ instantly in love.

@domihaz7788

Жыл бұрын

stay away from japanese girls who go on mother dates. that's how all the child kidnapping cases start

You don’t have to be friendly to be polite! They are totally not the same thing. Lots of friendly Americans can also be absolutely rude. They are not same things!

@beethao9380

Жыл бұрын

Yep. Just like lots of americans can be friendly, nice, etc. yet be secretly racist.

@visi5612

8 ай бұрын

@@beethao9380 why are americans always taking the blame for being racist when clearly anyone of any nationality can be racist? you racist

Politeness is always something directed to the outside world. It's a certain way to handle things. I like it when people are polite. For example, if you have a bad day you don't have to be rude. It's a kind of self control.

Imagine people that are neither polite nor kind calling people out for being polite but not necesseraly kind.

In the countryside some older people are not so polite upfront, but in their heart they cares about your well-being. In big cities like Tokyo, people act police but when you run into trouble no one is gonna help

The last person is right, it's just a matter of education and respect.

Well atleast they try not to be rude and confrontal about their rudeness unlike Karens in most countries so I still think they're polite even if they don't mean it. The *"tsk!"* Is the worst case scenario and not physical assault

@KaotikBOOO

Жыл бұрын

Worked in convenience store in Shibuya and to be honest..... There is physical assault "tsk" is far from being the worst

@asianprince8718

Жыл бұрын

​@KaotikBOOO Are you a foreigner working in Shibuya? In Family Mart? You have been offended while working? Would you mind sharing what was going on?

@user-qm7jw

Жыл бұрын

@@KaotikBOOO cuz Shibuya is a shithole in Japan.

@straberryshinigami15g97

Жыл бұрын

I’m a foreigner lived here many years and have experienced outward discrimination and people being blatantly rude towards me

@fadheelm

Жыл бұрын

The thing is, the amount of rudeness here is not that different with other countries.. also the nice one are often not genuine as well. For instance, your coworker might be nice to you but say bad things about you to your boss. It happens very often! You don’t know who your enemies are which makes it even worse

😂 I couldn’t pay attention with a topic much when you interviewed with so hot ladies !!! Lol

That last guy was literally like ‘we’re fake af’ 😂

We have similar situations in the West like good morning and yours truly

Thats better than some place where people are both internally and externally rude

The last person was so honest

The girl with light brown hair is so beautiful. It's like an angel descended to Earth.😮😇

It's just amazing that these people who was interviewed is honest and not trying to cover things up or smoothing things.

I remember talking to these two guys (both deeply into anime) about this girl who was in my sports club, as a general point of conversation because I thought her personality was pretty quirky (in a good way) and it made me laugh. But these two stuck to the fact that she was Japanese and made totally unrelated remarks about how Japanese people are so polite and reserved. I don’t quite remember what they said but I remember it made me go WTF because I could tell they genuinely thought that of all Japanese people and without the knowledge it is mostly formalities. We were also in an environment where we are surrounded by a reasonable amount of Japanese students just because of our schools location. It was just so strange and surprising of them to say that because they were praising the concept without knowing anything about it, additionally, still harboring these beliefs despite there being other Japanese ppl in our year.

I visited Japan in 2008, and I found people there the most politite, nice and helpful I've ever seen.🇵🇹❤🇯🇵

THAT LADY HAD A CHUU SMILEE

@perkyoppeyes9885

Жыл бұрын

thats why its so familiar omg

@12panem

Жыл бұрын

@@perkyoppeyes9885 U saw it too!!!

For those that haven't been to Japan, all of this can be summed up by two words: honne (hohn- nay) and tatemae (tah-tey-mah-ay). "Honne" is what one really feels and "tatemae" is the face you show to others. The last guy mentioned "honne" in his answer and the gal just before him laid honne/tatemae out without using the actual words.

The girl saying foreigners are way more friendlier is so beautiful ❤️ Love her from India

As a Japanese person I can confirm I'm always in a rush.

Polite and friendly are almost opposites. Being polite is often cold, and keeps people at a distance.

What I learned when I stayed in Japan for 2 years Japanese people on the surface: 🥳😁☺️🥺❣️ Japanese people on the inside: 🙄😒😑😮‍💨🤬 I had major trust issues there cause I never knew if someone was being genuine or just being a yes man

@1yanyiel

Жыл бұрын

I’ve heard about this as well and it’s quite sad. What can you say about the positive side?

@UnlimitlesslyFunnyDude

Жыл бұрын

They are always angry inside only polite on the surface level.

@jackfavvv0280

Жыл бұрын

Who cares if they are being genuine or not. If they can benefit you in some way, then just go with it for the time being. If you catch my drift.

@1yanyiel

Жыл бұрын

@@jackfavvv0280 It sounds simple when you put it like that. Perhaps when it comes to just plain daily interactions then it doesn’t matter if japanese people are genuine or not. But it gets problematic once it involves meaningful relationships.

@Oyuki-Mayonesa

Жыл бұрын

Walking around Tokyo. Interactions were polite, but I noticed nobody was smiling as they walked… then again after the second day I was no longer smiling either because my feet hurt from all that walking and no privacy from too many people everywhere allllll the time.

This is the same with Canadians. We are not so nice with each other sometimes, but we are very friendly to visitors

@sword_of_damocle5

Жыл бұрын

As a Canadian, this is why I've always gotten along far better with Americans than my fellow countrymen. I really appreciate how direct and open minded they are.

I am impressed with the insight and honesty of the people in the video. I have also been reading a lot of the comments, and many of them-most of them, really-are REALLY INTERESTING!

The accuracy of the last guy 🎯

Interesting, there seems to be a similar communication style in the UK.

@asianprince8718

Жыл бұрын

Example ?

@seafog

Жыл бұрын

Yeah we often say our mannerisms are similar to the UK (minus the sarcasm and drunk tourists) and Germany (more so than the UK like we follow rules strictly). But still UK people are friendlier (even on the surface) than in Japan, strangers don’t ever talk to you unless you are walking a dog lmao.

@asianprince8718

Жыл бұрын

​@@seafog Why is that? If someone brings his pet outside, people approach him?

@seafog

Жыл бұрын

@@asianprince8718 haha not really it’s just one of those rare instances, you wouldn’t ever say hello to strangers but you do to another dog owner while walking a dog. Or ppl w/o dogs might approach you if they want to pet your dog.

@asianprince8718

Жыл бұрын

@@seafog I see. A lot of people like dogs.

I think there is a difference between being polite and being genuinely kind. Even if Japanese people aren't genuinely kind, I still consider them genuinely polite because they still take other people's feelings into account which is the whole purpose of being polite. Mean people can be polite and well mannered. Kind people can lose their temper and be rude. I know some very loving and kind people that don't have the best manners. They're two separate attributes.

they’re always in a rush. when me and my family visited japan, my mom was unfortunate enough to get her foot stepped on TWICE and both times the people who did it just mumbled a small sorry and left😂😂

The last man summed up everyone’s attitude to politeness, not just theirs.

The westerners resisting politeness so hard in the comments

@nephinae5524

Жыл бұрын

Good

That's the same in India. People misunderstands them just cuz they are foreigners and are being treated well.

🇯🇵🇵🇭 Japanese Filipino here but you know everyone can be polite it depends but whenever is the acts were on point some of us can be nicer or different either or neither way around. In our genes this is called "Be nicer to Older or be gentle and polite" We eager be polite unless if this is somehow we are stress, sometimes we cannot act like we are polite. But you know culture is still culture. Need to be polite somehow this is the tend to be difficult. Like you or us. "Asian"

When I visited Tokyo I remember there was an overall different feeling just being out on the street. There was an air of consideration and basic respect that kind of felt like a relief to be in. I don't know if it would hold up if I stayed longer than I did but it was in stark contrast to the places where I've lived. It was nice.

This is exactly how it is where I live in Canada I find. Everybody acts polite on surface value, but inside they don't mean it.

@vacafuega

Жыл бұрын

Had that experience in Canada too. Took some time to adjust to it, it's nicer at first but very isolating in the long run.

They're polite cause they hide their feelings.

They were all very honest lol

They might not be that polite inside, but they sure are honest.

They're being polite because they're expected to, often times for work

this is exactly what british ppl are like. polite but only on the surface, really we are reserved and don’t want to be bothered

@nothinglastsforever0000

Жыл бұрын

Island gang

@sketchingtheworldwithkat

Жыл бұрын

I feel there are a lot of similarities btw Japanese and British. Huge national pride in politeness that is actually a bit dodgy.

@nothinglastsforever0000

Жыл бұрын

@@sketchingtheworldwithkat former imperialist islands.

@alisharahman2709

Жыл бұрын

​@@sketchingtheworldwithkat Can't say the same for northern England!! We're friendly and kind but boisterous or a little rude when it's needed 🤣

lol at the last guy, "They They'd know, we don't mean it." LOL

One thing I can say about Japanese people here in Germany is that they keep to themselves. Very distant. Not unfriendly or rude, but very stand off-ish. The same is true for Koreans and Vietnamese. People from the Philippines are more open and welcoming. Even Chinese are more approachable than the first two mentioned above.

Being polite doesnt necesarily mean being kind. But being polite can be respectful.

so if you dont mean what you say how can we ever know whats true?

@asianprince8718

Жыл бұрын

If that is the case, observe his expression after he said it.

@vitadude5004

Жыл бұрын

No one cares ... If u know the truth or not ..

The last guy is brutal af

Please don't block the subtitles.❤

Of so many nations I've been so far, the most genuine and friendly people I've met are Malaysian.

@AA123TD

Жыл бұрын

I lived in Malaysia for a few years. I love the Malaysian people so much. I loved seeing how many of them had friends that they'd have their whole life. Very honest genuine people and you'd be very blessed to make a friendship with a Malaysian.

95% of Japanese people who I've talked to were really kind. Even after them knowing that I'm Indian they still talk very politely unlike Americans or Europeans, most of them kinda gets rude after knowing my race.

@whybhavi

2 ай бұрын

What does race have to do with being treated nicely, but then again r@cism is still prevalent in many places, but gets unnoticed .

All my Japanese exes have told me that ''politeness'' is all a facade

Foreigners are friendly because they try to keep up with the standard of friendliness in Japan when I went to Japan it was a shock that nobody was rude ever but when I went home even in the airport the air felt angrier

Politeness and kindness are two very different things.

I live in Japan for 12 years, and i have the pleasure of know a lot of Japanese people and i can tell you: Most of them are very NICE PEOPLE, deeply.

The last guy , the best

I have mixed feelings toward people who wear a polite facade but secretly dislike me. I don’t mind strangers, whom I’ll never see again, being polite, but if I ever plan to build connections with someone, I’d want more honesty.

@J_Somin95

Жыл бұрын

I'd rather want someone say directly that they hate me instead of pretending to get along with me,like just stop

They are very good at evaluating themselves and see themselves from an outside perspective. Very intelligent.

That may be true. But an older Japanese gentleman was kind enough to let me know my train ticket fell out from my pocket while I was waiting for the train in Tokyo. Maybe I was just lucky to have a kind gentleman around at that time. I literally thought every Japanese person was just so nice after that incident because people in America wouldn’t care at all even if they clearly see your ticket falling out.

@Hotcheetos777

Жыл бұрын

this makes me feel better about korea. I dropped my wallet waiting for the bus and everyone at the bus stop started to let me know. It's still a hard place to live tho. and i'm korean lol.

@nilmerg

Жыл бұрын

Isn't that generalization too broad though? Both myself & strangers in America have also done similar acts of kindness. Just because others may or may not do so does not reflect on most of a society. That goes for many countries. As one of the ladies said on video, no one wants to bump into others, but some will still go 'tch' in annoyance when it happens. Not everyone will, but that just shows there are different types of people everywhere.

@johnpark7972

Жыл бұрын

I was traveling in US and someone told me my wallet fell out and gave it back to me. There are kind people everywhere.

@Sonia96410

Жыл бұрын

if Americans aren't considered nice, I don't know where you can find nice people. Speaking from the perspective of a foreigner who has lived in the U.S for over 10 years

@harliecurcio1705

Жыл бұрын

Where in the US were you? I've helped people who have dropped things and had the same happen to me. I've mostly been on the east coast though, so maybe things vary by region?

I agree with the people that say that even force politeness can be refreshing. That being said, it depends on *how* forced and how *often* that politeness is used. *There is such thing as toxic positivity.* EG: Where I am from in the states people over here sugar coat almost *everything* and expect you to pretend that every interaction with a stranger is more personal then it is- like you act as if you're gonna be besties but neither of you plan to care about to interact with the other ever again. We also have a standard to apologize for things that aren't even associated with us or our actions just to make others feel good. It's all about making others feel better and it's rare that people respond well to honest or blunt statements unless it's for a socially acceptable and dramatic reason. I like the "Southern Charm/Warmth" vibe of it and all, but after a while it makes sincerity seem fake, and over all it's just exhausting... becaus people will hold back the truth from you unless they have a social "gun" pointed at their head- like if all their besties are done with them avoiding telling what they actually think. When it comes to tell the truth (if it's negative or doesn't go with their social mask) they don't usually do it repsectfully either... because it goes against the social expectations. ...That being said I've met and heard of a lot of people recently that love that stuff because they grew up in (or have been in for a long time) places that are just the opposite. The places are so blunt and rude that it's a whole other kind of taxing and frustrating. With that in mind, I'm glad that those who like and need the kind of sweetness that comes from my community enjoy it when they get here. I think in the end it has to do with the balance of sweetness/politeness VS bluntness/rudeness. If it's *really* unbalanced you'll get sick of either extreme. It can also just have to do with the person's personality and their life experience. I'm a talkative, polite, generally energetic extroverted female. I usually do well in social arenas that are generally polite and soft/lighthearted... but at the same time I'm planning to move somewhere where people are more honest and open about their thoughts because most the people around me my whole life were so afraid of treating me with honesty I got *sick* of trying to tell what they are actually saying by reading their actions instead of their words. It just hurts. EG: They'll tell me they like having me over, but everything they do shows they hate having me around. They say "call anytime!" but when you suddenly call at 3am because you are on a trip out of town and you left the stove on- or if you can't get into your house and you're soaking wet and need to use the bathroom- they just give a strained smile as they (MAY *Possibly*) help. Then, as soon as the situation is over, they try to avoid you or give you social cues they don't like being around you. Or they just talk behind your back about how inconsiderate you are. On the other hand, when I went to some villages and towns in Kenya a few years ago, *anytime* someone knocked on the door in the middle of the night to just chat everyone would wake up all the adults in the house and they would have coffee and chill for hours. I'm not saying all the politeness and sweetness here is fake, but it has become a breeding ground for fake politness and sweetness. Some people won't be as bothered by the fake sweetness of my envirement, not as much as I am at least. I hope they thoroughly enjoy the experience. So, in the end, I guess it depends on what you personally need and prefer? This is a bit long but I hope this contributed to the subject in some way. Enjoy your day!

There was actually one story in history where a translator translated 善処します into I will do by best which is a literal translation, but is actually used to imply that they will think about it but never actually act.

this is the cultural difference. Non-Asians may see it as 'fake' but Asians are keeping nice to show good manners, keeping it classy and non-confrontational, just to keep peace and move along. Asians dont want to offend and are being considerate of the others feeling even if we dont really like their food as an example. Id much rather deal w strangers being fake nice so i can go about my day then rude ass ppl who feel entitled to 'keep it REAL'

@Hotcheetos777

Жыл бұрын

I mean yes, but also....the japanese kinda have a reputation even among asians lol. I feel like they take it to another level. They have the stereotype of being 'two-faced' for a reason ig. They're polite but when it comes to close relationships you can never tell and question if they're being genuine. Ig it helps if you've known the person for a long time tho

@Oyuki-Mayonesa

Жыл бұрын

I love it. Being polite is very civilized and elegant.

@cocaineminor4420

7 ай бұрын

Nah it's just Japanese lol Other Asians are more direct to your face They show their true self They are very honest

@maegalroammis6020

6 ай бұрын

Japanese people are so indirectly rude and racist. Only few Japanese are genuinely nice and good-hearted. I’ve had a very bad experience in them, with the toxic lying and hypocritical culture. Worst country to socializing.

My comment is late and will be lost but people tend to forget Japan is a very conservative society, so politeness and respectfulness is required of them or else they'll be seen as not respectable people. As opposed to the west, children and adults are almost pretty much on the same boat. If you look at the japanese side of the internet, they are almost pretty much the same as we are.

The equivalent of the southern "bless your heart"

If that last guy had told me he was from South Asian, I would’ve totally believed it!

Americans are also thinking the same negative thoughts as japanese, in addition to not being as polite. I think japanese often elevate westerners. We are not the carefree and non judgemental people a lot of japanese believe we are.

@starman4840

Жыл бұрын

The average American does yeah

Japanese people are *polite* in the way they talk, they dont offend. But doesnt mean they didnt take any passive agressive way to fight back. They just dont shout vulgarities like some anime villains, or talk back heads on.

yes it's tatemae and honne. in collectivist societies, for the good of society you wanna have a polite public face to keep peace and be mindful of others. so you mask your true feelings. in private though, your true feelings and behaviour may be far from the public image you put on for the sake of "face". it's prevalent in all east asian cultures. foreigners often mistake this for actual kindness but we are just being polite. on the contrary, in individualistic societies like most western cultures, people care more about themselves over others and aren't afraid to be blunt and honest about how they feel even if it means being outright rude to strangers in public.

So they are like us southerners in America- he is the kind who would say "bless your heart"