ADHD and Motivation

Hello Brains! Having trouble Doing the Thing? You're not alone. Motivation is one of the biggest challenges most ADHDers face. This episode is all about how to fix Motivation Bridge.
Special thanks to Doctor B from TakeThis.org for coming up with the clever phrase "fill in the planks" -- and for motivating me in so many ways.
And of course, a giant thank you to my brilliant editors and animators Palestrina and JustCallMeGary for working tirelessly to help me bring Motivation Bridge to life (and making me cry). You should...you should sleep now.
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#ADHD #Motivation

Пікірлер: 6 300

  • @leahapplebee
    @leahapplebee4 жыл бұрын

    Your videos have helped me more than anything in working through the challenges of ADHD. Looking back at my life before I found your channel, I was struggling so much to fully understand how to manage my symptoms and a lot of things were falling apart. Since I've found your channel, I feel less crazy, more validated, and more in control of my mind than I ever have before. It is not an exaggeration to say that your videos have significantly changed my life for the better and I cannot thank you enough for the impact you've had on me. ❤

  • @HowtoADHD

    @HowtoADHD

    4 жыл бұрын

    I’m not crying you’re crying 😭

  • @ayrenbethancourt9379

    @ayrenbethancourt9379

    4 жыл бұрын

    @@HowtoADHD I'm crying! 😢. Well done you both!!!

  • @shelby204

    @shelby204

    4 жыл бұрын

    I am also like Leah with my story, we have you to thank Jessica ❤️

  • @chuckles0692

    @chuckles0692

    4 жыл бұрын

    Leah Applebee agreed!

  • @npkiv

    @npkiv

    4 жыл бұрын

    Leah, I couldn't agree more or put it better.

  • @ChessHistorian
    @ChessHistorian2 жыл бұрын

    the "five minutes or five years" comment hit hard. I've literally procrastinated on a thing for years that I think about every day, and it's not even that hard, I just...

  • @FrttMs

    @FrttMs

    2 жыл бұрын

    Same here. And it's a horrible feeling.

  • @langtryvlogme

    @langtryvlogme

    2 жыл бұрын

    It took me THREE YEARS to finish a 300 page-long PDF book :(

  • @orintrost8611

    @orintrost8611

    2 жыл бұрын

    same here.. i really can´t believe how many people are writing the same stuff i would write in the comments

  • @afnan3225

    @afnan3225

    2 жыл бұрын

    IKR??? it's just undefined fear or anxiety of something I can't figure out

  • @imjustaguy4340

    @imjustaguy4340

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@langtryvlogme i dident even finish a 5 page book

  • @darkwisteria9120
    @darkwisteria91204 жыл бұрын

    Rewards as an adult haven’t worked for me. Me: if I do the thing I can have a cookie Brain: or you can have a cookie now and do it later Me: can’t argue with that logic

  • @Mark-sc6ob

    @Mark-sc6ob

    4 жыл бұрын

    Same lol

  • @kittycat1302

    @kittycat1302

    4 жыл бұрын

    Same, but worse LOL Brain: I’ll have a cookie anytime I damn well please. I don’t have to freaking *earn* a cookie or anything else!! HELP! What to do about this??

  • @arieheim5001

    @arieheim5001

    4 жыл бұрын

    Literally my whole college/grad career.

  • @charlottefreebairn1228

    @charlottefreebairn1228

    4 жыл бұрын

    Try having someone else give the reward! I personally would do anything for the sticker chart 😂 a new sticker everyday, I know if I didn’t have anyone to initiate that for me and help me along than id probably just put the stickers on my laptop or hoard them all.

  • @kenninast

    @kenninast

    4 жыл бұрын

    I really LOVE that you say that! My psychiatrist tried to push that method upon me. I always said exactly what you said, but he didn't understand. He basically "fired" me after a while. He said he couldn't help me. After reconsideration I kind of figured out: yes, he was right. He was a hack. Now I'm a few years later and still in the VERY same mess.

  • @aldobima9868
    @aldobima986811 ай бұрын

    "don't waste time trying to tell someone how important it is that they get it DONE. They know." touched my heart:')

  • @Rajgitaa

    @Rajgitaa

    5 ай бұрын

    but then are those people who need to hear that going to be watching this video so they can hear it from someone else?? If I tell someone that I know I need to do something, they respond with: "Then get it done!"

  • @samsmokes3100

    @samsmokes3100

    4 ай бұрын

    @@Rajgitaaand I respond with I wish it was as easy as that

  • @TheMusicalHarmonee

    @TheMusicalHarmonee

    6 күн бұрын

    That part touched me too. It’s me telling my family as they are lecturing me.

  • @azizbenhassine2114

    @azizbenhassine2114

    Күн бұрын

    SAME HERE ISTG

  • @christahester9174
    @christahester9174 Жыл бұрын

    I honestly started to cry when the brain was struggling to get over the bridge and the average person couldn't see the missing planks from their perspective. You captured that often un-nameable and unexplainable feeling so well

  • @charliedoubl

    @charliedoubl

    8 ай бұрын

    oh my gosh i did too. its really the feeling thats so familiar but you cant describe

  • @StreetNickel

    @StreetNickel

    4 ай бұрын

    Neurotypical people are too lazy to stop what they're doing and understand what we're going through

  • @fhdang8978

    @fhdang8978

    2 ай бұрын

    The amount of times as a kid I would try to explain the feeling but also being autistic and verbally inept I couldn’t, really ruined my life

  • @coastercraziness

    @coastercraziness

    2 ай бұрын

    I did too. This year has been such a huge struggle for me, my mental health has absolutely tanked because of my ADHD. This made me feel so understood

  • @gigi-xn1bj
    @gigi-xn1bj3 жыл бұрын

    i almost started crying when she said people with ADHD see people getting things done and start to think "maybe i am just lazy" bc I really think that at times and its hard not to feel that way ):

  • @tristantheoofer2

    @tristantheoofer2

    3 жыл бұрын

    ik im not lazy i just dont notice i procrastinate lul

  • @inconnu4961

    @inconnu4961

    3 жыл бұрын

    I totally agree. In fact, I am so frustrated with myself that i even tell people I am lazy or my quirky work-around is the 'lazy man's' method to do it! I have 'embraced, in a way, that people find me lazy.

  • @john_p

    @john_p

    3 жыл бұрын

    omg this

  • @devgoplani1387

    @devgoplani1387

    3 жыл бұрын

    Same for me , my sister is hard working and instead of feeling motivated iget demotivated and just unable to even lift a book

  • @SharlenesJourney

    @SharlenesJourney

    3 жыл бұрын

    Right 😞😞😞😞

  • @TheMysterysea
    @TheMysterysea4 жыл бұрын

    "Get it to me whenever" the scariest phrase of my college career

  • @iqi616

    @iqi616

    3 жыл бұрын

    I really hate that. Just as bad at work. It really makes me wonder if their boss actually needs it to be done.

  • @cryw1092

    @cryw1092

    3 жыл бұрын

    This is probsbly why I hated online schools. I had no reason to do anything other than the bare minimum, and it was horribly boring.

  • @RianeBane

    @RianeBane

    3 жыл бұрын

    That and "semester-long project." Because let's be honest....the former just ends up becoming the latter, with twice the guilt.

  • @pinkapoppy

    @pinkapoppy

    3 жыл бұрын

    i really hate it too... i mean, the teacher is obviously just trying to be friendly and nice but then, after several months of not having completed it, they’ll either get super mad about it, or tell you that you don’t have to do it anymore which is an AWFUL habit to make.

  • @gingit3239

    @gingit3239

    3 жыл бұрын

    I've been procrastinating on a huge work project for literally half a year because of how flexible they've been with me 😩

  • @sethvanrinsum265
    @sethvanrinsum26511 ай бұрын

    This 7 minute video has given me more insight than 1.5 years of psychotherapy

  • @alexandertato
    @alexandertato Жыл бұрын

    watching that little brain finally crossing the bridge got me more emotional than I'd like to admit

  • @johnnypayne5626
    @johnnypayne56263 жыл бұрын

    "don't waste time trying to tell someone how important it is that they get IT done. They know." That was so incredibly validating that I stopped eating my lunch and cried. I want to get it done. So bad. I want to do a top-notch job, want to be effective, want to care for people well, but sometimes it's so hard to get myself from point a to point b. When folks tell me, "just get it done" it is so anxiety-producing and stirs up such difficult thinking in my head.

  • @letiziaciancarini3804

    @letiziaciancarini3804

    2 жыл бұрын

    I'm now crying, I feel the same way. Next week I have this exam, it's the conclusion exam of my 5 years of high school. I'm proud for what I have accomplished and I want to study for the exam but I'm so not motivated, I'm so bored, I don't even know what to do. I'm so tired of my brain not working like everyone's elses. Thats so frustrating, my mum is helping me but she is also telling me "it's very important, don't waste the last 5 years!!" I know it is. Its not that, I know more than anyone how important it is, I just find it so hard to get it done

  • @Illfury

    @Illfury

    2 жыл бұрын

    And the guilt is equally as crippling sometimes

  • @DylanC828

    @DylanC828

    2 жыл бұрын

    I feel like I finally found people who understand

  • @heatseeka4468

    @heatseeka4468

    2 жыл бұрын

    It’s such a weird feeling personally because I don’t even understand it sometimes how I want to be good at my job working from home and provide for my wife, but sometimes the motivation is just not there and it’s a very weird feeling because I’ve done it before and had plenty of success before

  • @SugarMakesMePOP

    @SugarMakesMePOP

    2 жыл бұрын

    I can totally relate *hugs*

  • @shrestrasharma5093
    @shrestrasharma50932 жыл бұрын

    POV: you’re watching this as you’re procrastinating and seeking motivation to get the job done 🥺 These videos always make me cry, and they’re immensely helpful. Thank you.

  • @jorinlutz4363

    @jorinlutz4363

    2 жыл бұрын

    Right, I should be studying for my exam in two days but I'm watching this...

  • @katelynekeddy2560

    @katelynekeddy2560

    2 жыл бұрын

    They make me tear up to. Before these videos, it's like I felt the world isn't built for me, and I am not built for my culture or surrounding community.. I never understood how the world doesn't understand me... Almost as though seeing these videos helped me face a subconscience fear.... that maybe I've made up these scenarios or challenges I face... to explain why I'm not always productive in this world. Watching these videos makes me cry because it makes that's a part of ME real.... and that helps... acceptance and understanding helps take away a barrier Sigh of relief

  • @Zeraphei

    @Zeraphei

    2 жыл бұрын

    Me right now!

  • @JS-rv3et

    @JS-rv3et

    2 жыл бұрын

    pov im wondering if on top of my autism and highly suspected ocd if im also adhd or add

  • @izzyyy9797

    @izzyyy9797

    2 жыл бұрын

    literally what I'm doing right now and this video made me cry because I just haven't been able to understand why I have such a lack of motivation and now that I know some ways to overcome it I feel like I can actually meet my goals I'm so happy.

  • @laurad257
    @laurad257 Жыл бұрын

    Took me three years to get around to watching this video, but this is the best way I've ever heard someone explain motivation and how it happens for me. This makes me feel understood in a way I didn't even know I needed. I so appreciate your content. Thank you!

  • @landonmoses6663
    @landonmoses66639 ай бұрын

    In one adorable 7 min video, you perfectly explained every single failed project I've ever started in my entire 42 years, and the subconscious ways that I fixed the projects I completed. My mind is significantly blown right now.

  • @MeBeCreepy
    @MeBeCreepy3 жыл бұрын

    “When it’s a bridge we crossed before” *remembers writing being a fun and satisfying thing for me, but now I can’t even muster a sentence!!*

  • @penelopeabreu4083

    @penelopeabreu4083

    3 жыл бұрын

    mememememememe!!

  • @orsolyahegyi4193

    @orsolyahegyi4193

    3 жыл бұрын

    I have that with reading! Once I adored reading everything, but now it is difficult to even read a page..

  • @letsrocknskate

    @letsrocknskate

    3 жыл бұрын

    You just did, that's a perfect sentence-comment (y)

  • @ephemera...

    @ephemera...

    3 жыл бұрын

    I wonder if smart phones and other parts of new technology are causing this in me.

  • @kiserra

    @kiserra

    3 жыл бұрын

    @@letsrocknskate It's far easier to type out a sentence than verbally saying it on the spot lol

  • @lukeo.6410
    @lukeo.64104 жыл бұрын

    I lost it at “Wanna get your house clean? Invite someone over...” 😂😂 I’ve definitely used this tactic without realizing it.

  • @Yanayofficial

    @Yanayofficial

    4 жыл бұрын

    Foluke O. Me all the time!

  • @ambiguism

    @ambiguism

    4 жыл бұрын

    1000% almost knocked me out of my chair when she said that

  • @SleepyLestatSF

    @SleepyLestatSF

    4 жыл бұрын

    this his how I clean the toilet!! works every time!

  • @pegasusquilts

    @pegasusquilts

    4 жыл бұрын

    Wanna get unpacked after moving? Plan a party!

  • @misqdabarber

    @misqdabarber

    4 жыл бұрын

    I just did that yesterday 😂 When she said that I was like "YASSSSSSSSSSS" 😄😍🤩💪

  • @saphirestarr9952
    @saphirestarr9952 Жыл бұрын

    As a 30-something year old with a socially "respectable" profession, I was so ashamed of my personalized little sticker chart I spent time on every day while trying to build at-home habits- (an absolute nightmare!!) And I was battling both pride and shame when I'd show it to others. It is so nice to hear that sticker charts got a shout-out in the video!! I found that no commercial stickers were interesting enough, so I color and cut tiny pieces of paper out and use clear tape- BOOM! Any printable or drawn design is now a sticker! For extra large ones, clear packing tape is a huge success. Just remember to be careful!

  • @GeorgeBeckingham
    @GeorgeBeckingham11 ай бұрын

    I was diagnosed with ADD at 50 (non-hyperactive, so I flew under the radar for years). I developed a lot of coping strategies over the years, but I still struggle with motivation for tasks that are unscheduled, not urgent, or don't have a short-term reward. This bridge analogy is great; I think it will help a lot. The main strategy I use is split-tasking. I jump around between tasks at a rate most people would find confusing, but for me it helps make incremental progress. It doesn't help much with very long-term discretionary projects, though; I have between 20 and 30 novels in various stages of completion.

  • @jillthomason6032

    @jillthomason6032

    7 ай бұрын

    This is my most successful way of trying to get stuff done too 😊

  • @sannyn.5442

    @sannyn.5442

    3 ай бұрын

    Do you jump between tasks of different projects or different tasks of the same project. I‘m asking myself what would be better for out brains: try hard to stay focused on one project and doing it until finished or maybe switching between 2-3 projects to make them less lengthy, repetitive and boring….🤔 I was always afraid of getting distracted if not being focused on one thing, but now I saw this video I‘m not shure anymore if this is exactly what an ADD brain needs to get things done.

  • @klygrover
    @klygrover Жыл бұрын

    The problem with procrastination/urgency is that while you're finally doing the thing, you're simultaneously regretting that you didn't start the thing sooner because you would do such a better job of it if you had. I really like the idea of breaking the thing down into smaller pieces with different deadlines.

  • @ameidle

    @ameidle

    Жыл бұрын

    omg LITERALLY! i spent weeks struggling to make progress on my assesments, now that the deadline is a few days away, my sense of urgency is motivating me, but i'm so incredibly stressed and keep wishing i had this motivation before ahh 😭

  • @winxmons4140

    @winxmons4140

    11 ай бұрын

    gosh I spend hours regretting why I didn't start sooner. Its so draining.

  • @discopants68

    @discopants68

    11 ай бұрын

    There’s also the “rush” you get with the sense of urgency followed by feelings of immense relief when the task is finally completed. You don’t get the same adrenaline and dopamine hits from doing things in a timely manner.

  • @7-sodel323

    @7-sodel323

    11 ай бұрын

    Literally 🤕

  • @SkanMLL

    @SkanMLL

    8 ай бұрын

    For me the problem is almost the opposite.. because I procrastinate and get things done anyways, it makes it easier to justify the procrastination because "I always get it done in time in the long run"

  • @mikemuldoe2986
    @mikemuldoe29864 жыл бұрын

    When brain made it over the bridge: “don’t cry, don’t cry”

  • @daphne1065

    @daphne1065

    4 жыл бұрын

    totally. It hit home quite hard lol. I just want to get there, but it is so hard for me.

  • @parkerking6410

    @parkerking6410

    3 жыл бұрын

    Same here.

  • @estelaramirez779

    @estelaramirez779

    3 жыл бұрын

    I cried... Just a bit ❤️😅

  • @pavani17

    @pavani17

    3 жыл бұрын

    @@estelaramirez779 I am with you on that!

  • @krysalis2077

    @krysalis2077

    3 жыл бұрын

    RIGHT??!

  • @krash_1
    @krash_1Ай бұрын

    This is so true for more than having to deal with ADHD. My depression and anxiety gives me issues that are very much the same or similar. There are differences though. For instance, for me, self interest used to be a sure fired motivation. It has been a long time since my interest started to remove those planks in the motivation bridge. These videos done by How To ADHD actually help by bringing realization and recognition to the front of my mind. Even if the different subjects are things I knew or realized in my thoughts previously. Somehow hearing them changes things. As if hearing them in my own thoughts was where things stopped. But hearing them confirmed/validated the thoughts and my mind has permission to investigate another of my lane brain schemes/ideas.

  • @AdriianMoreira-iq3ih
    @AdriianMoreira-iq3ih4 ай бұрын

    I could remember several years ago I suffered from severe depression and mental disorder. I was addicted to illicit pills, alcohol, and smoking until I was recommended for psilocybin mushroom treatment. Psilocybin treatment saved my life honestly I'm 8 years clean now. It's quite fascinating how effective they are against anxiety and depression.

  • @AlfonsoGavilanes

    @AlfonsoGavilanes

    4 ай бұрын

    To be honest, mushrooms are one of the most amazing things on the planet and it is natural, they serve in many ways not only for mental related issues.

  • @Tomas-tw5ju

    @Tomas-tw5ju

    4 ай бұрын

    Can you help me with a reliable source I would really appreciate it. Many people talk about mushrooms and psychedelics but nobody talks about where to get them. It is very hard to get a reliable source here in New Zealand. Really need!

  • @TaylorLawrence-cv8sv

    @TaylorLawrence-cv8sv

    4 ай бұрын

    Yes, Sporeville. I had the same experience with anxiety, depression, PTSD, and addiction... Mushrooms definitely made a huge difference to why I'm clean today.

  • @TatianitaVillavicencio

    @TatianitaVillavicencio

    4 ай бұрын

    I wish they were readily available in my place. Microdosing was my next plan of care for my husband. He's 59 & has many mental health issues plus probably CTE & a TBI that left him in a coma 8 days. It's too late now I had to get a TPO as he's 6'6 300+ pound homicidal maniac. He's constantly talking about killing someone. He's violent. Anyone reading this Familiar w/ BPD knows if it is common for an obsession with violence.

  • @Tomas-tw5ju

    @Tomas-tw5ju

    4 ай бұрын

    Is he on Instagram?

  • @SuperGoose42
    @SuperGoose423 жыл бұрын

    "Wanna get your house cleaned? Invite someone over." Ohohohoooo that's dirty

  • @hatsunemisty

    @hatsunemisty

    3 жыл бұрын

    i notice this is the only time i actually clean and i was like WHOOP there it is!

  • @SuperGoose42

    @SuperGoose42

    3 жыл бұрын

    Misty Antonio same!

  • @kylie200

    @kylie200

    3 жыл бұрын

    I only notice how dirty the room is when someone get in my room

  • @audreyblair7180

    @audreyblair7180

    3 жыл бұрын

    I actually use this one pretty regularly. I can go almost completely manic cleaning mode after inviting someone over and I get done in 2 hours what normally would take me a week XD

  • @jakewwwjake

    @jakewwwjake

    3 жыл бұрын

    Honestly. This is extremely effective for me.

  • @fatmn
    @fatmn2 жыл бұрын

    Ugh, if someone says "turn it in whenever", I'm essentially guaranteed to not get it done.

  • @arieluv615

    @arieluv615

    2 жыл бұрын

    ‘Take your time’ is the enemy of progress. 😂😂😂

  • @Walkinjoy

    @Walkinjoy

    2 жыл бұрын

    Lol same I think I have a million years to do things until the day before

  • @LusiaEyre

    @LusiaEyre

    2 жыл бұрын

    It's such a double edged sward for me. On one hand, it limits the added anxiety of failure, messing up especially at work but on the other hand it's like 'fine. next year it is then'

  • @Suiseisexy

    @Suiseisexy

    2 жыл бұрын

    lmao I rewrote this macro to "turn it in ASAP" to avoid that problem and occasionally confused people when I reacted to what should be a lenient choice with annoyance

  • @janielewis8178

    @janielewis8178

    13 күн бұрын

    Maybe make that item the urgent one? The pay off - the person will be impressed at how fast it's completed.

  • @JustinElkinsII
    @JustinElkinsII Жыл бұрын

    I have had ADHD longer than there has been a diagnosis for ADHD (I'm 59). Your videos have helped me out several times when I was feeling frustrated with myself, which is easy because I'm also on "the spectrum" and have been since before they began talking about "a spectrum." This video, however, has been exceptionally helpful; I've shared it more than any of the others. You do an amazing job helping others with this brain-thingy that no one who isn't ADHD can clearly understand. Thank you.

  • @leannegosmeyer9294
    @leannegosmeyer929411 ай бұрын

    I'm just commenting to say that I am openly weeping while watching this video. Tears of happiness. My doctor and I have just approached the possibility that I have ADHD and I feel so seen by this video series and your channel in general. Understanding my brain makes me love me more. You've given me a gift!

  • @EbilGeneyus
    @EbilGeneyus2 жыл бұрын

    Man, that whole "it's even harder when it's a bridge we've crossed before" thing kinda stung. That hits home for sure!

  • @yoyo9winner

    @yoyo9winner

    2 жыл бұрын

    It made me think of doing work for education, things have gotten a lot harder since I’ve been at uni

  • @angeliqueligaray6146

    @angeliqueligaray6146

    2 жыл бұрын

    :((((((((((((

  • @yolanda6283

    @yolanda6283

    Жыл бұрын

    For real

  • @bamu9889

    @bamu9889

    19 күн бұрын

    This really stung. As a university student, I was struggling badly with ADHD but I managed to push through, such as completing a project report set for a month and just a night, and was able to meet deadlines with stressed-out late-night work now in my master's I can't get myself to do anything, and now I am moths behind on my progress.

  • @jjju3
    @jjju33 жыл бұрын

    God the bridge metaphor hits really hard. I've always had a hard time explaining "I just can't make myself do things...", People don't understand. With that metaphor it's more that I CANT do things because what I need to do them is missing, not that I _wont._ not that I'm not putting in the effort or that I'm not trying or that I gave up. Thank you

  • @pinkapoppy

    @pinkapoppy

    3 жыл бұрын

    B-atiful! same here! my friends and i have been trying to do work together over quarantine and i stopped showing up to our video calls because i wasn’t actually doing the work during the previous video calls because even with them there, i struggled to just do it

  • @anitanapp6759

    @anitanapp6759

    3 жыл бұрын

    It’s hard! I plan and want to do something in the house, try to pump myself up and end up sitting and “dazing “ getting mad at myself. Like right now, I need to get something done, but here I am looking at videos!!🙄🙄😞

  • @jul2447

    @jul2447

    3 жыл бұрын

    Same

  • @jonkimmel

    @jonkimmel

    3 жыл бұрын

    Same here. Thousands of times I’ve had something that I need to do, something I truly, desperately WANT to do, but I simply can Not do it. It could be something as simple as doing the dishes, or doing some laundry, cleaning, or anything really. It’s not just someone else saying, “clean your room”, and me thinking, “no, I don’t want to”. It’s me really, Really wanting to, but being absolutely unable to. It’s infuriating!

  • @kristenacaroline8821

    @kristenacaroline8821

    3 жыл бұрын

    yeah same! I think my brain exploded when she said that because it literally explained everything! so wonderful!

  • @esould
    @esould11 ай бұрын

    What works for me is to start doing a job without thinking about it or pushing myself. After a while, my brain is attached to the job and it goes on naturally. If it does not, it means I am too tired for this and I leave it. But I start with small and easy steps until my brain is 'warmed up'.

  • @ihavec-ptsd
    @ihavec-ptsd2 жыл бұрын

    “It’s okay to cycle back to your hobbies.” Insanely helpful to hear. I always feel like a failure when I don’t do a little bit of every one of my hobbies every day. The messaging out there is always: if you really want to get better you have to do it every day. Hellooooo feeling of failure! Then I realized when I pick up my banjo for the first time in a year, I haven’t forgotten a thing and I’m the same skill level I was when I stopped. Nothing lost. I’m not a failure. I just pick up where I left off.

  • @arrow1255

    @arrow1255

    2 жыл бұрын

    Same here! I never stick to anything for too long and it used to make me feel so useless, I thought "I have friends who have done one thing for many years (whether that's a sport or instrument etc.), why can't I?" (plus my parents really wanted me to "just pick something and stick to it") but now I realise it's okay to change hobbies a lot and seek novel experiences and it's much better to go along with what my brain wants to do rather than try and fight it and force myself to stick to something until I'm completely bored and end up hating it

  • @madelinecoats3421

    @madelinecoats3421

    2 жыл бұрын

    Amen!!!

  • @1129buttons

    @1129buttons

    2 жыл бұрын

    Everything you said I have felt so hard. I picked up my guitar maybe 5 years later, beat myself up about not playing. And though it was physically painful on my fingers, I was shocked to be able to still do everything.

  • @ihavec-ptsd

    @ihavec-ptsd

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@1129buttons That's amazing! I'm happy to hear that. I was the same way, fingers needed to build up a bit of skin but at least the muscle memory was still there

  • @VolkColopatrion

    @VolkColopatrion

    2 жыл бұрын

    I feel like I'm the polar opposite

  • @helanesteinmuller9279
    @helanesteinmuller92793 жыл бұрын

    It made me cry when the little ADHD brain teared up after crossing the bridge. I have a 65 year old ADHD brain that often got lost on the way to the bridge. One thing I learned (very late unfortunately) is to concentrate on getting better at what you are good at rather than wasting your life trying to match a neurotypical stereotype. ❤️

  • @CBL-if8jr

    @CBL-if8jr

    3 жыл бұрын

    Helane Steinmüller WE know so very well w h y the brain teared up after crossing the bridge..... I (67) did not get a diagnosis so far but since June ( a BBC reporter spoke about her ADHS and my brain signalled: This is US, too.) I am a much more relaxed person, telling ( almost proudly, because of feeling so free of SHAME and GUILT *NOW* ) people : 😉 I do what I can, being an ADDer ...; or I say: "Well, that was because of my ADDism and laugh " But I will try to find a specialist. Not easy in Berlin.

  • @Treeofwysdm

    @Treeofwysdm

    3 жыл бұрын

    "Concentrate on getting better at what you're good at rather than wasting your life trying to match a neurotypical stereotype." Amen Helane! 👍🏾

  • @cerealis_5432

    @cerealis_5432

    3 жыл бұрын

    Thank you! I really needed to hear this!

  • @helanesteinmuller9279

    @helanesteinmuller9279

    3 жыл бұрын

    C. BL1986 ❤️

  • @helanesteinmuller9279

    @helanesteinmuller9279

    3 жыл бұрын

    Treeofwysdm ❤️

  • @DBLQ06
    @DBLQ0626 күн бұрын

    What motivates me is YOUR INCREDIBLE WORK ON THIS CHANNEL!!!

  • @Ericbrown-se3kx
    @Ericbrown-se3kx5 ай бұрын

    Research has shown psilocybin to have potential to treat a range of psychiatric and behavioral disorders.

  • @morgancr1993

    @morgancr1993

    5 ай бұрын

    started microdosing mushrooms in place of my prescriptions and the difference is night and day in my mental health and my anger i feel like ive become a better person best decision ive ever made wish it was more accessible to those that need

  • @dorathyfoster1459

    @dorathyfoster1459

    5 ай бұрын

    Heard so much about magic mushrooms I'lld like to give it a try please where do I get from ?

  • @uncle-nice6556

    @uncle-nice6556

    4 ай бұрын

    I really don't know how Doc.toddshrooms grows em!! he's strains are %100 pure.

  • @katculbertson2444
    @katculbertson24444 жыл бұрын

    Thanks for mentioning that artificial deadlines don't always work. Setting "intentions" and writing them in a calendar or telling other people about them is such a common recommendation for productivity, but I have gotten so used to setting little goals and then NOT meeting them over time that I think it's actually damaged the motivation that urgency is supposed to give me. Not meeting deadlines feels so natural and inevitable to me at this point that it barely registers. Instead of giving myself a million finish lines and revising them constantly, I need to keep my expectations of what I can get done by when loose, and focus on making the actual work easier or more accessible. A helpful thing for me has been shutting down extraneous goals or barriers to starting. I don't HAVE to shower before I go run errands, and as soon as I start telling myself I do, I've basically lost my whole day. Whatever way I get the thing done is okay, and little rules I create for myself about how I need to accomplish something are just barriers to doing the thing.

  • @iqi616

    @iqi616

    3 жыл бұрын

    Exactly! An unnecessary task discarded is as good as a task done because it's out of the way.

  • @DeZusVanMijnZus

    @DeZusVanMijnZus

    3 жыл бұрын

    Wow. This feels so true to me. Thanks for giving me an extra way to understand myself.

  • @estelaramirez779

    @estelaramirez779

    3 жыл бұрын

    Yeah aryificial deadlines dont work a lot for me either... Paying 50 buvks for each day I don't do my public speaking training to a friend that was motivating!! Sticks work better for me now. 🙈😜

  • @emilys3638

    @emilys3638

    3 жыл бұрын

    "Not meeting deadlines feels so natural and inevitable to me at this point that it barely registers". Yes. This.

  • @cherrybomb2272

    @cherrybomb2272

    3 жыл бұрын

    Wow, you've just described my life.

  • @meechynailedit
    @meechynailedit Жыл бұрын

    Omg that urgently cleaning the house when someone is coming over has been my life. It goes from dump to hotel room in a couple hours 😂

  • @simonanardi4312

    @simonanardi4312

    Жыл бұрын

    I recently decided I just have to invite someone, let’s say… twice a month for the rest of my life! 💪

  • @PrincessNinja007

    @PrincessNinja007

    Жыл бұрын

    I have a friend who comes over to help me clean. I feel so bad about making my guest work that I'll do as much as I can before he comes over, so by the time he gets there he can just chill while I finish up

  • @Aabergm

    @Aabergm

    Жыл бұрын

    If you are curious there is a word for it too. It's called Scurryfunge and its a rather old word.

  • @KimUlrick

    @KimUlrick

    Жыл бұрын

    I think I will have to be a renter for ever because I rely almost entirely on rental inspections to have a clean house.

  • @clayjug4893

    @clayjug4893

    Жыл бұрын

    That doesn't work with me because I tell myself that a real friend won't judge too much the state of my appartment..

  • @skittlznt2611
    @skittlznt2611 Жыл бұрын

    Ngl, I cried a little bit watching this. I thought something was wrong with me. 😢 feels good to hear someone describe my daily struggle so accurately. I really needed this. Guess I will go get some stickers so I can finish this pile of work on my desk I'm neglecting so I can lay on the couch and watch this video. 😅

  • @6UY29
    @6UY2918 күн бұрын

    I may not believe I have adhd, but this whole video was extremely relatable, to an alarming level, and I think these tips will help a lot

  • @trunk1033
    @trunk1033 Жыл бұрын

    Does anyone else find themselves openly weeping while watching these videos that are not supposed to be at all emotional? Having someone illustrate so many of the struggles so vividly and accurately, after 40+ years of feeling like no one else experiences things like this... is just a bit overwhelming. thank you for putting all this content out. seriously... Thank you

  • @BrockPlaysFortnite

    @BrockPlaysFortnite

    Жыл бұрын

    Yup

  • @Ryptahi

    @Ryptahi

    Жыл бұрын

    Yes....

  • @ChristyThompson1221

    @ChristyThompson1221

    Жыл бұрын

    Yes but not as much as the autism videos I watched learning that I'm autistic. Now this is helpful and I am crying a little, but it's not as intense. That initial understanding of ourselves is so intense and incredible!

  • @evelynk9688

    @evelynk9688

    Жыл бұрын

    Yeah I just cried too watching this

  • @rachelposavetz2698

    @rachelposavetz2698

    Жыл бұрын

    Once I became more empowered with my ADHD and stopped guilting/shaming myself, these videos made me smile and no longer cry. You WILL find your way that works for you, keep having faith in yourself and love yourself through every perpetual "fail". Remind yourself, "That was the best I could do today. I love me". Our gifts of this different brain are needed in this world, don't put out your Light 🌟🙏💗

  • @elishahdavis
    @elishahdavis3 жыл бұрын

    I’m at a point where nothing works. I can’t trick my brain because it knows I’m lying to it and it doesn’t care about anything. I feel like i’m just watching life pass by while my adhd drives and I’m just in the passengers seat.

  • @anjupakanju3950

    @anjupakanju3950

    3 жыл бұрын

    Same here

  • @MrRedberd

    @MrRedberd

    2 жыл бұрын

    It got worse for me after an injury. Being incapacitated taught me new tricks on how to be more lazy. PT was put off, so...

  • @deprofundis3293

    @deprofundis3293

    2 жыл бұрын

    same... :(

  • @alliumporrum1728

    @alliumporrum1728

    2 жыл бұрын

    same same, at least we're not alone :')

  • @jessicahernandez7644

    @jessicahernandez7644

    2 жыл бұрын

    it might be time to invest in seeking therapy from a ADHD specialist?? thats what i'm looking into now cause i feel the same as you. ADHD feels crippling at this point.

  • @JackClayton123
    @JackClayton1232 ай бұрын

    Stuck on multiple deadlines, feeling paralyzed. In a crunch, typed in “ADHD paralysis “ and, what do you know, it’s the term used. And the found my favourite ADHD channel has already covered it. Thanks for the help👍. Also, congratulations on your new addition!! With an ADHD parent, kids don’t tend to have a boring youth (judging from my family).

  • @danielahermosillo8991
    @danielahermosillo89912 ай бұрын

    In 7 minutes this video made me understand myself and feel better about myself. Thank you so much

  • @RaxLakhani

    @RaxLakhani

    2 ай бұрын

    I've just watched the video and your comment says everything I'm feeling. This video makes me feel seen and understood ❤

  • @michaelheliotis5279
    @michaelheliotis52792 жыл бұрын

    Speaking of deadlines, I believe the receptionist at my dentist has cottoned on to the fact that I'm always late for appointments (in typical ADHD fashion) and now tells me it's an earlier time when actually it's booked for later. That way, when I'm inevitably late, I'm actually still on time. I can't know for sure as neither of us has brought it up, but now when I'm on time there's a conspicuous wait before I'm called, which never used to happen. I love her for that.

  • @texasseastar

    @texasseastar

    2 жыл бұрын

    I've asked my family to start doing this with me. If I'm ever "on time" for a family function there is something seriously off, because I'm inevitably ALWAYS late. I have always misjudged how long it takes to do something or how long it takes to get somewhere. Even with GPS, I underestimate or lie to myself about how long it's really going to take depending on the time of day. With appointments now when I book them I put them in my phone calendar as 15-30 minutes EARLIER than the actual appointment time to trick myself into being on time.

  • @rudyrodriguez762

    @rudyrodriguez762

    2 жыл бұрын

    Lol. My doctor's receptionist too knows I miss appointments because I forget and she calls 3.2.1 days before appointment date.

  • @stocktawk

    @stocktawk

    2 жыл бұрын

    You’re not late because of adhd lol

  • @AustinGuidoPlus

    @AustinGuidoPlus

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@stocktawk poor time management and becoming overwhelmed with the steps it takes to get ready for events (even something that’s seems simple like a dentist appointment) is indeed a trait of ADHD.

  • @danktankdragkings7117

    @danktankdragkings7117

    2 жыл бұрын

    Send that woman a fruit basket (other office gifts)

  • @pe9147
    @pe9147 Жыл бұрын

    Laughed out loud when she said “we don’t have little gaps in our motivation-half the bridge is missing”. Never heard something so accurate

  • @paulodonovanmusic

    @paulodonovanmusic

    Жыл бұрын

    yep, it's a really great workable analogy.

  • @Lilian040210

    @Lilian040210

    Жыл бұрын

    More like a brick wall to me. Even if I want to do something, I just can't. And the more I try it feels like squeezing my skull and brain against that wall

  • @NicholasWiewiora

    @NicholasWiewiora

    Жыл бұрын

    @@Lilian040210 Me with my 99% complete taxes that just need to be signed and sent... for the past 3 weeks...

  • @onmyway1574

    @onmyway1574

    9 ай бұрын

    It touched a nerve the therapists I have been to couldn't understand

  • @mohammedmaniar6722

    @mohammedmaniar6722

    9 ай бұрын

    When it dawned on me that my “effortless” grades were not sufficient for going abroad, so here I am in my masters trying my best and putting in work. Also I heard it was hard so I said why not.

  • @Fincaurum
    @Fincaurum8 ай бұрын

    i have a university exam the day after tomorrow and I have been procrastinating the study since now. This of coursehappened before and had me struggle a lot trought my academic career. This video alone helped me a lot to exit the vortex of depression I was going trough rn, thanks a lot

  • @travisdunn3047
    @travisdunn3047Ай бұрын

    Recently, I was humorously reminded of my ADHD in a situation that should’ve been simple. I needed to funnel supplements into a drink but couldn’t find an actual funnel, so I decided to make one from paper. However, I ended up forgetting why I needed the paper in the first place and mistakenly thought I had to write something down. After finding a pen and getting ready to write, I found myself completely lost, only to realize later that I needed the paper for a funnel, not writing. What should have taken anyone 30 seconds ended up taking me close to 10 minutes, just looking for the piece of paper and a pen, then sitting there trying to figure out what I was supposed to be writing down. This whole episode was a vivid reminder of how my ADHD affects me in ways I sometimes forget. It pushed me towards realizing the importance of understanding and managing my condition better. That’s how I came across your video, and I must say, a huge thank you is in order. Your content has been incredibly helpful over the past few days, providing me with valuable insights and strategies to better navigate my ADHD and improve my life.

  • @reillylafreniere2077
    @reillylafreniere20774 жыл бұрын

    I feel like verbal acknowledgments are underrated. It makes me so happy when I get an good job, or an I'm proud of you from someone I care about

  • @TT-rz5td

    @TT-rz5td

    4 жыл бұрын

    Let me tell you about my boss. My boss in the how many years I have worked for them, it has given me maybe three compliments. No wonder I hate my job. It's boring and I'm not good at it. And then I was trying to diplomatically tell my boss that I need more encouragement and acknowledgement when I do a good job because there are times when I do a really great job. And I told my boss about how when I was going to school and I was struggling very much with the subject, when I had a teacher that encouraged me and motivated me, every single class where that happened, I ended up getting an 'A' in the class. My boss simply didn't get it. I always do well when someone gives me a compliment

  • @QT-oc9rn

    @QT-oc9rn

    4 жыл бұрын

    ...Change the job if you can. My Boss knows I have ADHS and I told him that telling me I have done great gives my lots of motivation. He always tells me I am doing great with the tasks given to me (which I am :D) and it's really good for my work quality.

  • @irelyndhenry1176

    @irelyndhenry1176

    4 жыл бұрын

    I always glow with pride when I get a “well done!” from my teacher, but for some reason when my mom tells me that, I just... brush it off. I don’t know if maybe that’s just not my love language, or I subconsciously feel like she doesn’t mean it, or if it’s something else entirely, but for me, only certain people’s compliments help me.

  • @Happy.Accident.

    @Happy.Accident.

    4 жыл бұрын

    Reilly Lafreniere Ahh, words of affirmation can be very powerful! Usually the people who are fuelled by words of affirmation, are the ones that deliver it the most. However, the people that are more socially intelligent are the ones that will deliver motivators specific to a certain individual, even if it’s not a style that works on themselves; these are the people that are amazing employers, leaders & mentors!

  • @Happy.Accident.

    @Happy.Accident.

    4 жыл бұрын

    Irelynd Henry Are you referring to a specific teacher or any of your teachers? Perhaps you really admire your teachers and therefore hold their opinions of your abilities very highly. Perhaps you feel your mom doesn’t know enough about a task you’ve done ( hasn’t read it or etc), so you feel that her acknowledgment or comments of tasks don’t carry a true value. Perhaps your mother more often criticizes you, than praises you, thereby generating a response that dismisses and devalues any praise from your mum. Either way, I suggest just saying “thank you” to your mom, when she does acknowledge something she thinks you’ve done well on or something you’re proud of.

  • @UsagiOhkami
    @UsagiOhkami2 жыл бұрын

    When I'm struggling with reading, especially for school or study, I start reading out loud with different voices. It helps to keep me engaged and also gives me some associative memory for what I'm reading.

  • @ami0611

    @ami0611

    2 жыл бұрын

    I will try this! I struggle a lot with reading for unviersity haha

  • @dragonerd5305

    @dragonerd5305

    2 жыл бұрын

    I as well find that it's easier to remember stuff when I read it out loud!

  • @BlueDauntless

    @BlueDauntless

    2 жыл бұрын

    That's BRILLIANT!!!

  • @araschanne1

    @araschanne1

    2 жыл бұрын

    ohh I started doing this too and it's SO helpful!

  • @lucifasta7502

    @lucifasta7502

    2 жыл бұрын

    OH MY GOD I HAVE TO REMEMBER THIS

  • @Serviervorschlag-
    @Serviervorschlag-2 күн бұрын

    This video opened my eyes a bit more to the problem I struggle with for years.

  • @01Paulsgirl
    @01PaulsgirlАй бұрын

    This is so great, thank you! A perfect example of the artificial deadline happened this past Easter. After trying for months to come up with a gift idea for my nursing home friends for Valentine's Day, then almost missing the day because I was working on a last-minute idea, my husband offered to give me a "deadline" for the next holiday event I wanted to do. He said if I wanted to do something like the craft project, I needed to get his approval two weeks in advance (+ two more weeks, if I wanted to do it with others, like my "grands"). It worked beautifully! I came up with the idea quickly, got his approval (and help in simplifying it to a reasonable task), involved my grands, and was done in time for Easter! (Sadly, I got sick for the next two weeks. They still haven't seen the gifts yet. 😞) But they were done on time without the usual stress!

  • @greeniegames835
    @greeniegames8352 жыл бұрын

    That statement about 'not giving deadlines can make things harder for those with ADHD' really spoke to me. Had a professor who made everything due by the end of the semester. I got to the last couple weeks of the semester and hadn't done hardly anything. Especially when you throw depression into the mix, it's really difficult.

  • @f.d.6667

    @f.d.6667

    10 ай бұрын

    I am a college teacher WITH ADD/ADHD. I consciously don't distribute due dates over the semester any more b/c I know that people NEED to develop a strategy to manage their resources - one that fits their brains needs. People learn from failures more than from successes. Getting a bleeding nose in university has a *much* smaller negative impact on people's lives than getting fired from your first job because you can't manage yourself.

  • @becciprairie7963
    @becciprairie79634 жыл бұрын

    I’m literally sitting in my kitchen tearing up whilst watching this video, I feel so spoken to! Thank you @How to ADHD ☀️

  • @estelaramirez779

    @estelaramirez779

    3 жыл бұрын

    Me too... I also got teary eyes... Thank you!!!

  • @Felsenkeks

    @Felsenkeks

    3 жыл бұрын

    am literally also sitting in my kitchen crying right now...

  • @harpistforever3137

    @harpistforever3137

    3 жыл бұрын

    I also cried watching this

  • @kyliecarrasco10

    @kyliecarrasco10

    3 жыл бұрын

    Me too omg 😢

  • @lexuslloyd5576

    @lexuslloyd5576

    3 жыл бұрын

    i totally agree

  • @wellsmall
    @wellsmall Жыл бұрын

    I was diagnosed with ADHD by my psychiatrist THIS YEAR at age 41. I immediately found your channel and it was an "ah hah!" moment. You explain everything I've gone through my whole life that I was always told was laziness. I have 100 alarms (literally) on my phone to remember to do things, like get in the shower, pick up the kids, leave for work, take medication, go to bed, pay that bill! The alarms are never ending. People coming over is definitely a motivation for cleaning, until too many people come over and I start making excuses why the floor doesn't need to be mopped again this week or the laundry can be thrown in the other room out of site. My mom helping me do things like clean the garage are often the only way certain things will get done. My husband has worse ADHD than me and won't set a single alarm to help him remember...anything. It's obnoxous. I'm high anxiety so just people judging me is a motivation. I totally agree about people saying "no rush" is terrible. Clients will tell me that thing they want is "no rush" and it falls to the bottom of my inbox until they email me again for an update. I need deadlines, and I'll likely still do it the day it's due unless I'm having a really good day. For college (yep I'm trying college again) I have a fear of a B! That's my motivation to study hard, even the boring stuff like humanities. It's always worked for me, even in high school, but I was a little less OCD in high school about A's, I would often settle for a B if it meant not working as hard and papers definitely got written the night before they were do. Thanks for your great videos! Definitely helps me feel more normal and understood!

  • @davidjassogranados3162
    @davidjassogranados3162Ай бұрын

    I almost cried at the end of the video… seeing little brain getting to cross the bridge. Hard week this has been for me, world won’t ever stop reminding me I have adhd.

  • @hobihope2981
    @hobihope29814 жыл бұрын

    Recently, I've started to listening to audiobooks while walking/jogging, and I only let myself listen to the story while _on_ my walk. So if I'm listening to a really good book, I end up actually motivating myself to go walking because I want to know what's going to happen next! I know it's a pretty small thing, it's just walking, but as someone who hates exercise it's really been helping me out!!

  • @paigemcninch3003

    @paigemcninch3003

    4 жыл бұрын

    This is a wonderful idea! I have the opposite problem where I don't know how to make time to listen to audiobooks because I get too focused on what I'm doing to pay attention to the story. Maybe I should start going on walks!

  • @hobihope2981

    @hobihope2981

    4 жыл бұрын

    Paige McNinch Thats why I started doing this in the first place actually!! I needed to start walking and I missed listening to audiobooks! Its also really nice because walking's not distracting enough to take over your brain's attention, and if you're listening to the right book the ambience of wherever you're walking really adds to the experience (Ive been listening to a small town mystery while I walk around my small town which makes it so much spookier and cool!!)

  • @AVspectre

    @AVspectre

    4 жыл бұрын

    Podcasts and audiobooks are pretty much the only way I can ‘get in the groove’ for tons of tasks (laundry, dishes, snow shoveling...). It keeps my brain from wanting to bail early, and provides a good source of BYO (“bring your own”) stimulation. Only problem? It doesn’t always encourage me to be quick with the task. For time-sensitive things, I sometimes use audio content as timers/deadlines (this task must be done by the time this podcast/playlist is over. I even use a (music) playlist in the mornings that provides subtle prompts for my getting ready routine (by Song X I should be brushing my teeth; by Song Y I should be heading out the door). One favourite for mornings (especially for difficult parts of the routine like waking up or leaving on time) is “My Shot” from Hamilton. I find it energizing and motivating. :)

  • @mrsaskander

    @mrsaskander

    4 жыл бұрын

    Hobi Hope its SUCH A GOOD IDEA

  • @mercuryfever392

    @mercuryfever392

    4 жыл бұрын

    I've started listening to podcast while I do the dishes. Music itself wasn't cutting it anymore. It's much more tolerable listening to a podcast about history.

  • @lulaklaw4101
    @lulaklaw41012 жыл бұрын

    My mom is always confused as to why and can't just "do it" and I always thought I was a lazy idiot so i literally started sobbing when i watched this, it feels so good to have someone understand

  • @Boules99

    @Boules99

    Жыл бұрын

    Did you show this to her? Did she respond well?

  • @chester8420

    @chester8420

    Жыл бұрын

    I know a lot of lazy idiots. They are just lazy idiots. Is "not wanting to be a lazy idiot" a motivating plank? Does the excuse of knowing I have ADHD remove motivational planks? Yep. That's why I think it does no good to label people. Everybody is different. I think these obscure undefinable mental "disorders" are detrimental. Oh don't get mad at poor me, I have ADHD....

  • @lightdark29

    @lightdark29

    11 ай бұрын

    Same! I always used to get scold for forgeting things since i was a child....

  • @saturday8587

    @saturday8587

    11 ай бұрын

    My family , friends and even my teacher have said i'm lazy and dumb. And it's frustrating...

  • @saturday8587

    @saturday8587

    11 ай бұрын

    I remember getting hit by my teachers for this exact reason

  • @nigelchua4055
    @nigelchua40559 ай бұрын

    Thank you, I don’t think I’ve watched anything more relatable ever. You’re doing great things. Keep up the great work!

  • @Sam-iz2ww
    @Sam-iz2wwАй бұрын

    I keep on thinking that I’m just tricking myself that I have adhd but recently I have been struggling with deadlines at school. This has been happening for years now and I never knew why I couldn’t just do it. I hope information like this helps me to help myself

  • @savannahhaley7473
    @savannahhaley74733 жыл бұрын

    Omfg I'm about to cry. The amount of times I've been told I'm lazy is too numerous to count. I actually finally freaked out on my boyfriend and told him if he ever calls me lazy again I'm leaving. I just don't need to hear it anymore, even in a joking way, it's so discouraging.

  • @migtwitzr4734

    @migtwitzr4734

    2 жыл бұрын

    You shouldn’t be with someone that calls you Lazy, and you know that.

  • @dianeaishamonday9125

    @dianeaishamonday9125

    2 жыл бұрын

    Leave him anyway, sis. No one should invalidate you even in a joking manner, and that's on PERIODT

  • @codex4046

    @codex4046

    2 жыл бұрын

    I would tell him to watch these videos. People who say this (even jokingly) don't understand us and these videos will help a lot in starting to understand us. I can explain it so many times and in so many ways but people don't grasp what I mean when I do so. Nowadays I just tell them to go to this channel and watch at least 3 videos with the topics they get frustrated by when it comes to me.

  • @ColorJoyLynnH

    @ColorJoyLynnH

    2 жыл бұрын

    Been happily married 24 years. I am dealing with several losses right now including my 87 year old mother who has a brain injury from a car accident, and my most constant buddy died in November... he was a collector of stuff and the final bits of stuff that was his is in boxes on any floor of this 950-sq ft house we could find. My hubby does things quickly... he doesn’t agonize about decisions. Every little item in the boxes is a decision my friend can’t make himself. One day I broke down and said “If I can do it, I do... I love to work, I love accomplishing things. If I say I can’t, I really, truly, can’t.” And he finally got it.

  • @imjustaguy4340

    @imjustaguy4340

    2 жыл бұрын

    And he should understand or yall shouldent date, i agree

  • @catk961
    @catk9613 жыл бұрын

    The “turn it in whenever” make so much sense in quarantine. Teachers are so flexible and I feel myself procrastinating more and more.

  • @Tolyuhh

    @Tolyuhh

    3 жыл бұрын

    oh, same. Quarantine has been terrible for my studies. Online lecture that you're meant to watch "sometime in the week" is... never going to get watched. Assignment officially due next week, but the teacher says don't worry if it's late? Not going to get done until the end of term. I know that for some people these things have made it much easier but I wish teachers would understand that for some of us they really really don't.

  • @Alex-fu3mi

    @Alex-fu3mi

    2 жыл бұрын

    I started a “self-paced” online course that’s supposed to take about 40 hours to finish. That was two months ago. Almost done now though!! 🥳

  • @joannebies3879
    @joannebies3879Ай бұрын

    This is the BEST explanation of how I operate (or don’t operate). I’ve had some things to do for 3 years… and I’ll be darned… it’s a start and stop for me. Some of the tips here, explained why I do what I do, are definitely going to help me to plow through. When it’s done I’ll feel so much better. I procrastinate, then hate myself. Thank you for this video.

  • @CY-vd4sh
    @CY-vd4sh Жыл бұрын

    Hey Jessica, I started watching your videos just a few days ago, and I just want to say that your channel has changed my life. I'm in college right now, and I have been since 2016, and oh my goodness it has been an uphill battle from the very beginning (and that hill has only gotten steeper). I've developed at least 2 mental health conditions and multiple traumas, so as you can imagine the suffering has bern overwhelming for years. I've seriously thought of giving up on my dreams. However, these videos have given me info that can seriously change this battle I've been fighting with college. So thank you so much for giving me enough hope to keep going.

  • @mirandahemsworth3628
    @mirandahemsworth36283 жыл бұрын

    literally cried when she talked about how we feel so down about ourselves due to wanting to do tasks but unable to.

  • @flipnshifty

    @flipnshifty

    2 жыл бұрын

    whats the difference between crying and literally crying

  • @henryfitzgerald4965

    @henryfitzgerald4965

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@flipnshifty The word “literally” in this context adds the inference that crying is probably not an expected reaction for the writer. Also, think of the phrase, “I was floored by…” (an internal, emotional response) as compared to, “I was literally floored by…” (as in, found myself on the floor). I hope this is helpful.

  • @loris4142

    @loris4142

    2 жыл бұрын

    I'm with you on this. A close friend how much on the possibility of me having ADHD, more learn, the more easy it is to accept and correct. But sometimes the realization is overwhelming.

  • @shan22777

    @shan22777

    2 жыл бұрын

    same here, im constantly called lazy by my family for this

  • @maxhess3151
    @maxhess31513 жыл бұрын

    How is it that I have every symptom mentioned in this channel and yet I was never even suspected of having ADHD?

  • @samanthashumway8168

    @samanthashumway8168

    3 жыл бұрын

    Same!

  • @scottbowman27

    @scottbowman27

    3 жыл бұрын

    Same it took me having a son who is ADHD for me to realize that I'm not broken

  • @miles7885

    @miles7885

    3 жыл бұрын

    Same, probably because I never let anyone see what was going on in my brain. I guess i’d rather stress myself out instead of people telling me “Focus” “Work harder” “Stop being lazy”

  • @devent10n

    @devent10n

    3 жыл бұрын

    No one ever thought I did until a couple years ago, at which point we realized my brother's had dramatically overshadowed mine when we were kids, because they presented differently (he had a lot of behavioral symptoms and I didn't), and I didn't know enough about what it actually was to say "I think I also have it". Once I learned about it, a lot of pieces feel into place in my brain puzzle.

  • @betaCarrotYT

    @betaCarrotYT

    3 жыл бұрын

    In my opinion, this a serious problem in the global education system, the lack of awareness is... astonishing.

  • @Nomad_3040
    @Nomad_30409 ай бұрын

    This Is the first video I've seen from you, and I already love it, because it not only shows me more ways to help myself do stuff, it also proves why certain things work. Thank you.

  • @MrJimeih
    @MrJimeih26 күн бұрын

    This video really cuts to the heart of the struggle I've had over, well, my lifetime. I have been diagnosed with ADHD as an adult and learning more about it is just recontextualising a lifetime of experiences. It makes sense. Doesn't make it easier, not yet, but at least it makes sense why I was struggling the way I was.

  • @maddylions5680
    @maddylions56804 жыл бұрын

    *me watching this while in bed with 25 things on my to do list and 0 motivation, feeling depressed and frustrated* This video came at the perfect time, thank you

  • @novictim

    @novictim

    4 жыл бұрын

    Lol then do good things seems like u dont wanna feel good lazy bum

  • @blckheart8148

    @blckheart8148

    4 жыл бұрын

    @@novictim you don't get it..

  • @kenninast

    @kenninast

    4 жыл бұрын

    Once I went to bed, trying to sleep. And my brain went crazy. With one thought only. The same thought all of the time. Kept me awake for at least an hour. Wanna know what that thought was? "Don't think about anything or you won't sleep!" in all possible variations!

  • @zackaryjackson4568

    @zackaryjackson4568

    4 жыл бұрын

    Hang in there bro!

  • @mostazezo

    @mostazezo

    4 жыл бұрын

    same I'm trying to stay in this really good school and my grades are terrible and my ADHD gave me severe depression and social distancing made it worst (all though I'm an introvert) and I just AGDHSHHDHS

  • @airblows5249
    @airblows5249 Жыл бұрын

    i’m in one of the biggest slumps of my life right now and this video is making me tear up. i hope i can build my bridge

  • @wesleyy5224

    @wesleyy5224

    Жыл бұрын

    so am I!! We got this bro

  • @beatlesqueensabbatheclashc6301

    @beatlesqueensabbatheclashc6301

    Жыл бұрын

    Same here, I'm feeling hopeless rn. I wish we'll overcome this.

  • @scjmusic

    @scjmusic

    Жыл бұрын

    Remember how your emotions shift - you will be ok... and then you will be able to implement some of these ideas! I am 62 and still learning - but this is the best information I have ever received here on this channel!

  • @Fubarahh

    @Fubarahh

    Жыл бұрын

    Me too. I was just diagnosed - at 64! I've had executive dysfunction my whole life.

  • @Emotionless0000

    @Emotionless0000

    Жыл бұрын

    Same I need to finish school at 22 to go on after... sometimes it's hard and I can't focus on my work.

  • @ludwigetc
    @ludwigetc9 ай бұрын

    The way you immediately start explaining with images and analogies makes me feel so seen 💗

  • @mands_ca
    @mands_ca3 ай бұрын

    I got a huge boring time to fix a problem at my system at work, and then, yesterday, I spoke with another department about it and it reminded me of the importance of this work to be done, and how it would make my own job better and easier, and it was magic. I'm now extra motivation with finishing that as soon as possible. Now I have to learn how to do it because I want to. The tip is amazing

  • @jammypat996
    @jammypat996 Жыл бұрын

    I was recently diagnosed with ADHD after years of thinking I was unmotivated, unintelligent or just flat out lazy. Seeing the videos on this channel, and realizing that other people go through the exact same struggles I do has been a huge help for me.

  • @TheAngelFireStar

    @TheAngelFireStar

    Жыл бұрын

    You described my own struggle and it's so validating. I was diagnosed this year (very recently) and I've spent decades thinking I was everything you described. I was relieved and angry when I found out because of the support I could've received and the grace I could've given myself years, letting myself know that it's not my fault. Better late than never I guess but still. Thanks for sharing. 💜

  • @Doc-jw7rh

    @Doc-jw7rh

    Жыл бұрын

    ​strange how I constantly rekindle motivation and lose it perhaps I lack a true commitment

  • @cosmicpuma1409

    @cosmicpuma1409

    Жыл бұрын

    I totally agree. I am finding this out very late in life and while I wish I knew it earlier, I am happy I understand what's behind the personal challenges.

  • @xrayanegamer7486

    @xrayanegamer7486

    Жыл бұрын

    potato 🤑🤑🤑🤑

  • @pharynx007

    @pharynx007

    Жыл бұрын

    i've thought i was just depressed for years, but then i finally started antidepressants, and they didn't really... do anything. like i think they helped my mental attitude a little bit, but i still lacked motivation to do the things i wanted to. and i was worried that i was actually just lazy. but i've recently discovered that ADHD also has a motivation problem, and i'm thinking that might be the real issue, that may have even caused my depression. i'm hoping to see if i can get evaluated soon, and get some medication and therapy, i can start being a functional person.

  • @Koolio2213
    @Koolio22134 жыл бұрын

    The discovery of this channel had made me cry more than once, because of how much I relate. I always thought it was my fault, I was not motivated, I was not smart enought or good enough, I always put it on me. I've only watch a couple of your videos, because I only found you a week ago, but you have show me so much and I appreciate you putting your self out there and showing every one what its like to have ADHD. Your Ted talk was so amazing and I really just love you for showing me steps to reach my potential.

  • @NyghtWolf

    @NyghtWolf

    4 жыл бұрын

    Started watching this video & literally started crying.

  • @caztastic9120

    @caztastic9120

    4 жыл бұрын

    Oh man, I had a similar experience. I can’t even remember which video it was but I found myself crying because finally things made sense.

  • @patrickhennessy8040

    @patrickhennessy8040

    4 жыл бұрын

    Oh this makes so much sense... I need to buy me some stickers... I like that idea

  • @brendareed5050

    @brendareed5050

    4 жыл бұрын

    Bowen Homeniuk can you link to er Ted Talk? Thank you!

  • @auctionrogers

    @auctionrogers

    4 жыл бұрын

    Wow more people crying ! Lmao thank god!

  • @justindunlap1235
    @justindunlap12359 ай бұрын

    These videos are great to come back to and rewatch when you feel the need for a little validation and guidance.

  • @nancyirwin3150
    @nancyirwin3150Ай бұрын

    I am newly diagnosed with this and so much of what she said made so much sense to my brain. For a long time I was really embarrassed and I admit I'm still kind of frustrated that things I used to do or be able to power through and do, I am having a much harder time of doing now. Thanks so much for this, this really helped a lot and made me feel better.

  • @pssnyder
    @pssnyder3 жыл бұрын

    "I tend to get bored of my hobbies really quickly..." YOU ARE IN MY BRAIN...so far this quarantine I've dabbled in web site design, electronics, robotics, programming, gardening, amateur radio, home improvement, aquatics, 3D printing, and guitar...and that was last week so who knows what I'll get into this week... Thank you for the videos, they are really helpful in making me feel like a regular human being again.

  • @fieldy409

    @fieldy409

    3 жыл бұрын

    I suddenly got obsessed with fungus growing. You can buy the kits online and like a potted plant they''re clean enough to watch them grow mushrooms in your kitchen lol.

  • @pinkapoppy

    @pinkapoppy

    3 жыл бұрын

    Patrick Snyder LMAOOO same here!! the one thing that has kinda stuck with me was minecraft, which i’ve been playing daily from 8-10pm with my friends and there’s a lot of different things to do within it, and it’s nice to talk to my friends too so it’s quite entertaining. lately it’s been a little boring though and i don’t know how to make it more fun and exciting again-

  • @ryno4ever433

    @ryno4ever433

    3 жыл бұрын

    I've given up trying new hobbies because I know it won't stick. I just play video games now. The only thing that has stuck with me is gardening, and even that is starting to fall off.

  • @kristenacaroline8821

    @kristenacaroline8821

    3 жыл бұрын

    yeah. its like 'yeah thats interesting but nah, not today' and like I can't figure what I want to do with my life.

  • @blahblahblahblah2837

    @blahblahblahblah2837

    3 жыл бұрын

    Can I suggest - for those of you who want to stick to hobbies and make it 'your thing', find one with a community and solo component. Eg. dancing, calisthenics, art classes, music groups, archery, model planes, mountain biking etc etc - take a friend, make a friend, go once a week. It's also something you can work on at home with youtube videos. If the hobby has a few different rewards to it (social, novelty, physical stimulation, skills progressions) you're more likely to stick to it. Otherwise, if you like to cycle through hobbies like many of us do, buy the equipment second-hand in good condition or buy it new and keep it in good condition. That way, when you're bored of it in days/weeks/months/years you can sell it and get your money back on it. Or rent the stuff first to get a feel for it.

  • @Kadotus
    @Kadotus4 жыл бұрын

    Those missing planks have cost me so much money... :´(

  • @HowtoADHD

    @HowtoADHD

    4 жыл бұрын

    Omg same. I call it the ADHD tax

  • @22angd

    @22angd

    4 жыл бұрын

    Yes so true!

  • @92RKID

    @92RKID

    4 жыл бұрын

    @@HowtoADHD Useful description! Kind of unfortunate that we have this kind of thing here in the US. Motivation bridge, that's exactly what I've got to work on filling for a couple of routine things that are not interesting and need to do anyway for various reasons.

  • @irelyndhenry1176

    @irelyndhenry1176

    4 жыл бұрын

    Alison Jordan what did you mean by that first sentence? I’m not trying to start an argument lol I’m maybe just uninformed? Are ADHD accommodations better in other countries or were you referring to taxes or...

  • @a.z.fellco.1704

    @a.z.fellco.1704

    4 жыл бұрын

    And so much time. And frustration.

  • @salmank3131
    @salmank3131 Жыл бұрын

    How brutally relevant and exact video is this , every aspects is so co-relating , thanks for this content.

  • @TheGibberingGoblin
    @TheGibberingGoblin Жыл бұрын

    You have a very nurturing outlook on ADHD as a whole. I think a lot of people really appreciate that. 😊

  • @Elusar316
    @Elusar3164 жыл бұрын

    I love how Brain respawned at the savepoint after falling down the canyon.

  • @mailesmith168

    @mailesmith168

    4 жыл бұрын

    elb that was very reassuring!!

  • @AnnClaire
    @AnnClaire3 жыл бұрын

    I can't believe it took me this long to discover that everything I've been struggling with is (likely) ADHD. Every video is just seeing my life explained.

  • @jeng6786

    @jeng6786

    2 жыл бұрын

    Same. And I keep thinking that maybe I'm wrong and tricking myself into believing I have it but then I go to another video and it explains another thing I've been having a lot of struggle with for the last 2+ years

  • @MJR_heyfunny

    @MJR_heyfunny

    2 жыл бұрын

    Same I turn 44 on September 6th here soon and I was diagnosed back in like 2nd or 3rd grade but I stopped taking my medicine my senior year of high school so being off meds for 27 + years I'm now realizing after finding this channel yesterday that I needed the medication for far more than just doing better in school

  • @britty23

    @britty23

    2 жыл бұрын

    I got diagnosed last year at 30 years old. It's been life changing and made my life so much better. The process of getting diagnosed can be a long one, but it is worth it if you have a happier, more productive life.

  • @angeldeal3291

    @angeldeal3291

    2 жыл бұрын

    Girl. Same.

  • @NikoruNinja

    @NikoruNinja

    2 жыл бұрын

    Same ㅜㅜ

  • @norpedholland5696
    @norpedholland5696 Жыл бұрын

    I just found this channel. I’m already really thankful for this video.

  • @Lericah4902
    @Lericah4902 Жыл бұрын

    Thank you, I didn't know I had ADHD until I started hearing "lack of motivation" from the psych channels I watch. This video gave me new tools that I've never used and explained the pain I've felt from years of feeling lazy and useless.

  • @FamousActor1989
    @FamousActor19894 жыл бұрын

    This is one channel I always immediately click for. And even if it’s delayed, I have an understanding why. Thank you for what you do!

  • @HowtoADHD

    @HowtoADHD

    4 жыл бұрын

    Thank you!! That means a lot ❤️

  • @angelah.5732

    @angelah.5732

    4 жыл бұрын

    @@HowtoADHD i made sure i hit the extra notification reminder / alert...

  • @Z.A.M.1359
    @Z.A.M.13594 жыл бұрын

    Now I'm wondering how many times when I thought my lack of motivation was depression that it was actually ADHD. I also wouldn't be surprised if there are times the two causes have teamed up against me.

  • @avril.227

    @avril.227

    3 жыл бұрын

    I haven’t yet met someone with ADHD who *doesn’t* have comorbidities: the simultaneous presence of two or more diseases or medical conditions in a patient.

  • @nanakatz1492

    @nanakatz1492

    3 жыл бұрын

    Same!!!!

  • @nanalove3819

    @nanalove3819

    3 жыл бұрын

    same! I don't know if I have ADHD but I relate a lot to some symptoms. And now I'm just there, because I know I am depressed : do I like motivation because depression makes me think I'm not good enough, is it because my ADHD can't focus on the reward, is it because I am too anxious about it, or I am just a lazy person who finds herself excuses?

  • @MrRedberd

    @MrRedberd

    2 жыл бұрын

    I don't think my self medication has helped either

  • @mcacleanjackson9437

    @mcacleanjackson9437

    2 жыл бұрын

    If you are shot of AdderaII" for your ADHD then get more at darkfax.com No prescription is Required

  • @emceeboogieboots1608
    @emceeboogieboots1608 Жыл бұрын

    You know what you are doing that's for sure. You had me almost through the entire video before I started to scroll the comments 😂 Being officially diagnosed some 5 or so years ago was something of a relief, but seeing videos like this and reading other people's comments really gives me some solace. It is hard to imagine sometimes that anyone knows what it is like when other people are are just getting things done and I am struggling But knowing is half the battle. I am sure many of us have found some of these techniques ourselves, however support like this channel, meds and other tips can really help. Thanks for helping people 🙏

  • @hailypegasister816
    @hailypegasister816 Жыл бұрын

    Where have you been when I was growing up?! Literally I love you!❤ I’m 20 and have been diagnosed and medicated for adhd since I was 8, but only NOW learning how to properly explain it to others instead of being frustrated! This “motivation bridge” explains my issue with following through on plans perfectly!🤩 Awesome video! Looking forward to watching the rest and any you make in the future!

  • @butterflypaint4332
    @butterflypaint43324 жыл бұрын

    I can explain how relieved I was when I found out that this was caused by my adhd and not bc I didn’t care. For years I thought the reason I couldn’t just sit down and do my home work was bc I just lacked the proper motivation and i continued to think that when I got into high school and tried to start doing things that will make me more prepared for a good future only to fail at it every time. I’ve been diagnosed with adhd since kindergarten but until that year ended and I tried to sit down with all my might and just study for my SAT bit by bit every day I finally realized something wasn’t right. So I finally reasearched if adhd has an affect on us other than just our ability to focus and remain calm. I have such a low self esteem over this bc it’s easier to see when you’re not able to get something done bc you’re not able to focus and hear what the teachers saying. But it’s so much harder to realize it’s not your fault when it comes to motivation, bc it can often feel like we really don’t care. “And if you really DID a care you would have done it by now.”

  • @iqi616

    @iqi616

    3 жыл бұрын

    It's actually the opposite - caring is a big part the problem. Unimportant stuff is often easy to do. Vacuum the carpet? No problem. I try to reduce the amount I care - just enough to make a hole in the wall, not so much that I can't be bothered.

  • @tamecapless

    @tamecapless

    3 жыл бұрын

    This speaks volumes to me. Recently, I’ve been noticing how my struggles have gotten worse in spite of how increasingly hard I have been trying. I‘ve contacted a GP in regard to what makes things so difficult for me, initially enquiring about a different diagnosis. When the doctor had a look at the list of what I’ve been experiencing, he said it could actually be ADHD, not what I’d thought. My initial inner reaction was “HA, impossible!” and it was very much based on a stereotypical and shallow understanding of ADHD, but the more I research, the more I seem to understand how I work... It’s safe to say that I am now pursuing getting tested and finding techniques that work for me in the process.

  • @scotmelville
    @scotmelville4 жыл бұрын

    You finally had the motivation to do the motivation video! #successfulADHD

  • @HowtoADHD

    @HowtoADHD

    4 жыл бұрын

    We diiiiid! We had to fix motivation bridge to get it done 😂

  • @ElizabethCTelle

    @ElizabethCTelle

    4 жыл бұрын

    @@HowtoADHD was there something specific you did to fix motivation bridge on this video?

  • @juliemartinez3312
    @juliemartinez3312 Жыл бұрын

    I am so grateful I found you on KZread I have struggled my whole life and was never actually diagnosed with ADHD or ADD however every single thing that you talk about is exactly my life for the last 64 years thank you so much 🌻

  • @Brookefree23
    @Brookefree238 ай бұрын

    Been watching compassionate self-discipline/ motivation videos trying to get my life back on track. Didn't finish a single one of the videos before this one. The animation is perfectly engaging. This has made me feel so much better😊

  • @Snazjazz17
    @Snazjazz173 жыл бұрын

    1:21 the shaking eyes making it look like it’s about to cry is literally the most relatable thing

  • @azratosh
    @azratosh4 жыл бұрын

    Never pressed this quickly on a notification; I'm struggling to study for my exams and your timing is honestly a lifesaver. Thank you so much.

  • @abbskebabs6288

    @abbskebabs6288

    4 жыл бұрын

    Same I got 2 months worth of coursework due in 1 week. I HAVENT STARTED IT 😩😩😩

  • @sophiediangelo9680

    @sophiediangelo9680

    4 жыл бұрын

    Same😊👍

  • @millivanil4102

    @millivanil4102

    4 жыл бұрын

    Me too!! Tomorrow starts my exam week (haven’t read) and I have essays to write that are already late. But I’ll do them and have to accept it even if it’s not my best. Good luck to you all too!! :)

  • @haha__hihi

    @haha__hihi

    4 жыл бұрын

    so did I and I did unfortunately fail it. How about you guyz ? What are the techniques you have implemeneted and how ? Majority of the comments say how this video helped them. Surely, there are things I missed.

  • @omsnaga

    @omsnaga

    4 жыл бұрын

    How did it go?

  • @davidrichards613
    @davidrichards613 Жыл бұрын

    First visit. I'm undiagnosed but the more I learn of ADHD and Autism the more sure I become that I've lived with them my whole 44 years. This video had me close to tears just to see this explained. It's cost me so much, caused financial issues, cost me a higher grade on my University degree and High School exams before that, my house is like a journal of tasks not started or finished... now there are so many tasks I'm so overwhelmed I can't make any of them feel rewarding enough to get then done before more pile on, only the urgency of serious consequences impending within days or hours seems to be enough to make that jump across Springifeld Gorge.

  • @sannyn.5442

    @sannyn.5442

    3 ай бұрын

    I‘m also 44 and undiagnosed, but did some online tests, read and listened to a lot about ADHD and I‘m absolutely shure I‘m at this party, too. My life is exactly the same like yours. So many unfinished or not started tasks concerning house or business or kids or pets. The long story of not doing but procrastination undermined my self-confidence extremely. I started to pay for an organization coach that - I‘m so lucky! - is specialized on ADHD (in fact SHE was the one who told me I should inform myself about ADHD so I came to my conclusion I got this, too). One day a week we meet online and organize my home. I get many tipps and different perspectives on my needs and individual organizing strategies, but also the permission being ok like I am and the understanding that everything I need is finding a personal way to approach the things instead of changing and breaking me just to be able to do it like everyone else does. After the household I‘ll do my business. The more my environment becomes clear the more my head becomes clear, too and the other side around, of course. But somewhere I had to start and I chose my house. Your comment is 10 months old and I hope you have found some good steps to get along with yourself and your things. And I hope you could understand me, English isn‘t my mother language.😅

  • @SailorRalph
    @SailorRalph Жыл бұрын

    This hits home so hard for me. I have often just blamed myself for being lazy, beating myself up emotionally and mentally which fuels my depression and then the cycle begins again. I appreciate this new nugget and understanding about myself and life.

  • @olbdj9239
    @olbdj92394 жыл бұрын

    These videos really help to put exactly what I'm struggling with into words. I literally just pulled an all nighter, telling myself that I won't sleep until I get this work that's weeks overdo done, and I STILL haven't gotten around to it, opting instead to tidy my room, sketch, play on instagram, and literally anything else. I want to get this task over more than anything, but the lengthy, repetative task has become so daunting that it created a gap in my motivational bridge that I've been struggling to get over for weeks.

  • @AlexAminoff

    @AlexAminoff

    3 жыл бұрын

    Story of my life. I would advise just doing 2 minutes of it. Just start but without any obligation to go longer than 2 minutes, but be mentally open to going longer if you feel like it. For adhd brains like you and me, starting is the hardest part. If those first two minutes peak your motivation or interest it’ll get done no problem, if not it’s ok just try again tomorrow. Don’t feel bad, trying to do a task when your adhd brain is uninterested is like torture.

  • @cerealis_5432

    @cerealis_5432

    3 жыл бұрын

    @@AlexAminoff what about something like an essay? Or college work in general?

  • @AlexAminoff

    @AlexAminoff

    3 жыл бұрын

    The Matrix I’m still struggling wit ADHD pal, I did well in college because most of it you can do with last minute work. But I flunked out my first year in law school.

  • @elishahdavis

    @elishahdavis

    3 жыл бұрын

    story of my lifeeeee i said i would go to bed rly early tonight but i know imma stay up till 4am anyway.

  • @noemita494

    @noemita494

    2 жыл бұрын

    I've also done the same and I've started doing the work like at 4 or 5am and I don't think I've always finished.

  • @Moechella444
    @Moechella4442 жыл бұрын

    Every single task where I could "turn it in whenever" has never gotten done. Currently in the middle of doing one of those now, and I'm GOING to get it done this time.

  • @nekroneko

    @nekroneko

    2 жыл бұрын

    Have you done it?

  • @luminousstrawberries

    @luminousstrawberries

    2 жыл бұрын

    @@nekroneko yeah, update please! :) You can do it

  • @chasedunn6259

    @chasedunn6259

    Жыл бұрын

    You got it done, right??

  • @Moechella444

    @Moechella444

    Жыл бұрын

    Unfortunately I couldn't get it done and had to hand it off to someone else 😭 I'm really sad about it because I wanted to see it through to the end but just couldn't.

  • @chuchu5923

    @chuchu5923

    Жыл бұрын

    @@Moechella444 It's okay, feel you bro

  • @WendyWinchester
    @WendyWinchester7 ай бұрын

    I literally teared up by the end of this video. Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU!

  • @DUBS720
    @DUBS7206 ай бұрын

    This is one of the best ADHD videos I’ve seen. It really is an eye-opener for not only understanding my son’s brain, but also my own (since we both have been diagnosed with ADHD)

  • @astranoel895
    @astranoel8953 жыл бұрын

    Watching the little brain struggling to cross the bridge and looking sad and disappointed hit me SO HARD. I'm almost in tears myself, cause it's so relatable.

  • @hentaimonster
    @hentaimonsterАй бұрын

    This bridge analogy is the best analogy for my motivation or lack of motivation, I tell people I need motivation to do things or want to do things. They do not understand, and people who need no motivation often just do not understand it.

  • @MeeshT
    @MeeshT4 жыл бұрын

    This video hit me with all the self-loathing and self-deprecation I've felt for the past few months, and especially the past couple of weeks, for not finishing my dissertation and other projects. I've tried so many of these strategies but I have been unable to forgive myself and take proper mental and physical breaks when they don't work for me. I know it's critical that I get my degree in the next few months. I know I needed to send the draft a week ago. I know I can. I got about 70% of it done by this time last year but then I had physical health issues that deeply impacted my mental health and I'm frozen to the point of lacking the focus to process sources when I read. I just burst into tears watching this. Out of frustration, out of a sense of shame, out of fear of lack of control, out of feeling stuck and thinking maybe I could've been saved the worst parts of my mental health issues - anxiety disorder and major depression - had I gotten the resources to build habits when I was younger to counteract my lack of focus and motivation with important things that make me literally freeze when I have to confront them. I am stuck with migraines and I have come to the point where urgency - typically the only motivating factor for me - no longer helps and only adds to this despair. I keep going back to the documents I need to focus on and then just staring or changing things back and forth without proper progress. I have added one substantial page to my dissertation in the past three months and I hate myself for it. Recently I've had difficult times with health in my family on top of it all so now my ability to focus and control my anxiety is even worse... I don't even have access to a therapist and I'll be travelling soon so I don't even know how to ask for help at this point without being shamed by those around me who love me but simply do not understand that I feel this overwhelming impotence that I don't even know whether I can attribute to a disorder I'm not diagnosed with or not.

  • @katharineeavan9705

    @katharineeavan9705

    4 жыл бұрын

    Trust me, you are not alone. I finished my MA last year and without the support I got at Uni for my anxiety and depression plus the help of an amazing classmate who was my accountability buddy throughout I honestly don't know if I'd have made it. I don't have an ADHD diagnosis (I'm hoping to get a referral this Monday actually, but the system in the UK sucks so it'll be a while before I get a proper answer) but I've yet to find a single thing on any of Jessica's videos that I don't relate to. Some suggestions for possible planks for the motivation bridge when you're ready to face it: If you have a classmate or even just someone who also has work to do that you can have study sessions with over the internet or in person that could be really useful. It's easier to stay accountable and stay focused when you know at the end of these fifteen mins you're gonna be reporting back what you've managed to get done. I don't know if it'll help but I often used 4thewords for my coursework. It's a writing gamification site that encourages you to write in blocks and reach certain goals by having you fight monsters and finish quests. The monsters' hit points are a word count and there's a timer to complete it by to win the battle. It's a subscription site but I think there's still a free trial with no credit card sign up, and it's cheap enough to be worth it if it works for you. It's very novel and there's events and new things coming out all the time to keep you engaged. I'd imagine you've already tried blocking, but that's another thing that can help. Only do the thing for five mins at a time. When the five mins is up, go get a drink, stretch your legs, text a friend. Then come back and do another five mins. Print out the article you want to read. It sounds dumb, but sometimes just having it in another format can help. You can doodle on it, feel it between your fingers, take it to work, highlight sentences as you read them. It can help to have it be more tactile and have it be away from the distractions present on a computer. Make studying an event. Get a ritual together. A couple of good snacks, a nice drink, a comfy outfit, a candle. Don't spend too much time or money on it, as that can be a procrastination black hole, but make it so the study event is exciting. You want to do the studying cause you get your candle and your snacks and stuff. Go the opposite way. Read a few paragraphs while you wait for the kettle to boil and then leave it. Write a hundred words while you wait for your friend to text you back or the TV adverts to finish. Make some notes while waiting for the bus. Don't wait to have time to study, just do a little here and there with no pressure to reach a specific goal. Talk to people about it. It sucks, and it's important to find people who won't just make you feel worse, but talking it through can really help. Sometimes just getting it out there and having someone listen can be extremely helpful. Sometimes they'll have resources you can use. Sometimes they'll just be there to sympathise. Either one is good. The How To ADHD channel has some great study tip videos as well if you haven't found them yet, so make sure to check those out. Sometimes even just understanding the whys can help make things easier.

  • @J-Hell

    @J-Hell

    4 жыл бұрын

    You're not alone in this, honestly, but from what you've written it sounds like that's a big part of how you feel. I love all of Katherine's suggestions. I would also add that sometimes just having another human being in the room can be really grounding and helpful. They don't need to completely understand what you're going through so, "Could we spend some time working in the same room? Sometimes it helps me stay on task," might be enough. Also, therapy while travelling is possible! Dr Lindsay Doe who hosts the Sexplanations KZread channel recommends a service that sounds very flexible. Communication can be via many different media, even email or text if necessary. I can't remember the name of the service but I'm sure she would reply to a question about that through KZread or another medium.

  • @chelseajackman7730
    @chelseajackman77304 ай бұрын

    Brain's face at 6:29 had me almost crying.