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@GuidetteExpert

2 жыл бұрын

Men giving dating advice is not as good as women because its the women that men are trying to understand. Unfortunately too many man are using manipulations to pick up women which is not good long term.

@CONEHEADDK

2 жыл бұрын

I think, I could hear your voice go a bit lower, when she had said hello, and you replyed the same.. Men seem to do that automaticly, if a beautiful women greets them in a very open way.. Just saying - I might be wrong..

@LavishPatchKid

Жыл бұрын

"A Woman's Guide To Attracting Women" Useful to lesbians - and guys who picked the right wife.

@bobbobert1964

Жыл бұрын

“We can get as crass as you want on this show.” …………………….

@adamj.davidge7933

Жыл бұрын

Chris, mathew hussey is your man for a ladies coach

I remember when I was about 13, a mate came round our house and knocked on my door. When I answered he was standing there with two girls. The girls looked at me and went "eeewww". Always had issues with confidence with girls. Always felt ugly. If a girl did that to me now I'd probably thank her for letting me know what a terrible person she is.

@emilyb5278

2 жыл бұрын

Boys do this too, yes it just shows you they are ugly inside and have no confidence so have to put down others. As a fellow girl if any girl puts down my nephews ill be telling them go for the jugglier gloves are off. Not hitting but a good who the fuck do you think you are kinda slap.

@jameseverett4976

2 жыл бұрын

Rule # 1 [in all of life, relationships, etc]: EVERYthing is information. When you look at things in that perspective, even the bad things help you avoid further misery. People will reject you then wonder why you don't come around anymore, and complain that you're "taking your toys and leaving the sandbox" or some other butthurt reaction, because they need people to reject in order to be the one's on top of the social game. Without an audience, how can they be popular? Without the unpopular people hanging around hoping for some respect, being popular loses it's meaning and fun. Women rely on the guys they reject to boost their egos and make them feel entitled to something better. And the more guys grovel and give them attention, the more they feel they deserve, and start rejecting the only opportunities they'll ever really have for something more than a 1 night stand. So these women who men use for sex, are telling themselves that just because a popular/desirable guy slept with them, then they must be good enough to have a chance to snag a guy like that into marriage. They're fooling themselves of course, because their ego is too easy to inflate with false, short lived attention.

@david22591

2 жыл бұрын

@@emilyb5278 the world needs more women like you who call out other women on that kind of behaviour.

@vickingvicbubble8042

2 жыл бұрын

With age, women also become more mature, and I find that there is a lot less of this kind of cruelty. It is true that single women 30+, often are less self-confident. Being in a good marriage is better than having 2 plants and a cat!

@stevengruber57

2 жыл бұрын

I wonder how many attractive men have screwed them over by now, and whether they are changing their minds on what is important.

23:30 - To her point that in the 90s men were flirting more often than modern men: it's not just that dating apps are making it easier; it's also that flirting is more widely being denounced as toxic masculinity and creep-culture, and as that Gillette as told us: "Not cool, man. Not cool." The majority of teachers are Progressives, and Progressives haven't had a very favorable opinion of strong men after the Sex Revolution. So the men of the 90s had very different teachers, TV shows and commercials than the men of the 00s, and they face a VERY different culture because now anyone can record a mess-up frame it badly and make you a viral video.

@danielkrcmar5395

2 жыл бұрын

Doesn't help when men flirting gets them slapped with sexual harassment claims and job losses...

@mrmorhouse

2 жыл бұрын

Gillette is for betas. City cuckboys. Women are still women. And boy, are they thirsty. Almost more so than before because now there's all this repression of attraction and the game. And interests and so on. And all that shit is going to come exploding out. No matter the culture war. Women still want a highly ranked man. Socially I mean amongst her and his peers. The alpha. Lol thirst traps are a thing. Most women want to be approached. Politely and endeared. It's fun knowing your attractive in a playfully flirty way. Especially if your single just catch someone's eye band wave. Or blow a women a kiss and watch her blush . Even when you have absolutley no chance of ever seeing her again sometimes just letting someone know " hey I seen you" can make someone's days.

@maddo7192

Жыл бұрын

The ones with good advice are often the ones with a lot of problems themselfes.

@cjw6659

3 ай бұрын

^ Yes.

@mrsherwood2599

3 ай бұрын

You need to change "progressives" with "women". Don't be scared, we will back you up. "Progressives" is a cop out. Most progressives just want billionaires to pay their taxes.

The higher up a social hierarchy a woman gets, the smaller her dating pool. The opposite is true for men.

@thomastucker7317

2 жыл бұрын

@@PBNIP Is that not exactly what he said?

@laturista1000

2 жыл бұрын

And that's why Kezia locked down a man and had a kid before she hit the wall. she's approaching 40. She been doing this since the days of mystery method, the game and lovesystems early late 90s to early 2000s. not a fan of her pua advice, but still she gave her contribution to the community.

@nour1949

2 жыл бұрын

@@PBNIP this isn’t true, it depends on the man, some want a partner with similar lifestyle, meaning similar work, similar income so they can have a partnership versus man is sole bread winner, it all depends on the man.

@wyleecoyotee4252

2 жыл бұрын

@@PBNIP That's not true. Many professional men marry laterally . Both work during the marriage.

@emilyb5278

2 жыл бұрын

@@PBNIP I think if you go out with someone who is not financially stable your going to get used for stability. That's why both should be financially stable, the only time I'd say yes it's preferred to be with a man who can earn a sustainable living not a millionaire but can afford the basics is when you have a baby becausevits nice to be able to concentrate on being a mum while they are young but I think nobody normal cares if you are rich but more like normal things like own your own home or rent, own a car. I'd say men want that too but only when you get to a certain age.

Imagine a 40+ guy, wealthy and handsome, would speak that openly about that he loves 18-year-old girls. Hell would break loose.

@ytano5782

Жыл бұрын

Remember the shit storm against Leonardo DiCaprio, because break up with girl until 25.

@Not_From_Holland

Жыл бұрын

Pick up artist Tom Torero openly said he likes younger women and a Womanist writer for Newsweek wrote a hitpiece on him saying he ''lures'' women into his home when all he does is use attraction and seduction. Tom was an OG when it came to picking up girls in London in the 00's. He ended his life after that article because his social media, bank account etc were all blocked. RIP Tom

@spencerantoniomarlen-starr3069

Жыл бұрын

​@@ytano5782 yes, but what happened to him? And is he still dating ripe young lasses? Yes. I agree the backlash is stupid, but it didn't have any effects

@lavish_1717

Жыл бұрын

@@ytano5782 He’s still dating 18 yr olds

@michaelk4740

Жыл бұрын

💯

Back in the day I was apart of the pickup game movement. My game had always been decent, but as the competition got better I was kind of forced into it. It was a lot of fun at first as it seemed like a superpower, but after some time "pick up" became quite insidious for three main reasons. 1) Women's game, for whatever that is, got even weaker because successful men purposely shouldered the entire the pickup process in order to be able to control the entire narrative. 2)Woman started thinking they were of a higher value than what they were, because the could "get" guys that were clearly out of thier league even though they were just being used for sex. This resulted in them ignoring men that would have been great matches because they thought the could "do better". In my and my friends experience, those lower status girls always thought they were just on the edge of locking one of us down, when the truth was they never had even the slightest chances. 3) The "bottom 80%", many of which are high quality men, really started resenting women, because they could see the fantasy hooks that the women were continually biting on all while ignoring them. So all that to say, as a result the dating scene is much worse now, especially in regards to the app, as women have become far more entitled and unwilling to developed themselves AT ALL as they are "perfect as they are" [the modern feminist lie] causing many quality men to entirely quit. Thus the whole MAGTOW movement.

@ChrisWillx

3 жыл бұрын

Fantastic insight. Thank you

@sansivian

3 жыл бұрын

@@ChrisWillx Thanks. I hope there is a female dating coach out there you can interview. I'd love to hear her experience. Especially how she incorporates developing personality and interests beyond ascetic appeal with her clients. Id love to hear how the coach would challenge women to become better person or to be more interesting. Because as this guest seemed to implied its all on the men to have great conversation, but i know far more boring women then I do men, unless you consider gossip and pop culture interesting. (Which I don't). So I think its just as much on women to meet men half way in conversation as it is for men. As the late great Patrice O'Neil said: "Men only wants sex from you ladies, if thats all you gave to offer." So ladies, have more to offer if you want to keep a quality man around. I often tell both men and women if you want someone to take interest in you BE interesting. Have hobbies, go on adventures, have stories to tell. An ideal match is someone you meet along the way with common interest, NOT someone that you hunt for or hunts for you. Aka, bars, clubs, and apps. Love the channel, I try to catch every podcast. Cheers.

@ChrisWillx

3 жыл бұрын

Leave it with me brotha

@henrytoledo4103

3 жыл бұрын

yeah #3 , The 80/20 rule is true. 80% of women are chasing the top 20% of men. Eventually the lower 80% start getting frustrated and either start hating women or just give up.

@tomclark15

2 жыл бұрын

Yep. Women consistently rate 80% of men as being below average in attractiveness. Their expectations in dating are not really based in reality. When I've said this to girls they usually either deny it's true or say that women having such high standards is a positive thing.

It’s not just a skill. If you are doing well in life it’s a million times easier to talk to women than when you aren’t. Big part of the equation

@masterfoggy88

Жыл бұрын

Luck 🧬 environment too complicated, the only obvious thing in this conversation was the make up and weapons!

@jimbosavage

Жыл бұрын

Not really true in my experience. I've hooked up with women when I was unemployed and going nowhere in life. To be honest I probably had more sex during those times because I didn't have a job lol.

@Chris-ki2dx

Жыл бұрын

@@jimbosavage Honest question, where you more or less happy when you were unemployed, going nowhere in life but having more sex?

@RYXPfan

Жыл бұрын

It's not a question of whether or not it's possible for unemployed "losers" to get with women. @nickblood7080 is just saying it's EASIER when your life has more going for it.

@James_36

Жыл бұрын

@@Chris-ki2dx Jimbo has it bang on tbh, for all this hypergamy rubbish that I really do not think exists as if its a law. I met my current woman when had no job and was loving my freedom. I had a cheque from a company and spent 3 months enjoying my new found freedom, it was like a life reset from the turmoil that I was going through. Those 3 months of being a nobody so to speak, made my life I have now. I remember the sense of freedom I had... only problem was the money slowly diminishing. I am working hard to get that feeling euphoria of freedom back and who knows where that takes me

Interesting how most dating coaches are single themselves

@mickaelsflow6774

Жыл бұрын

Dating coaches, not relationship coaches. For a reason. On a more serious note, relationship "coach" would be divorce lawyers, most likely. (coupled with therapy; solo or couple)

@bobtheelder7

Жыл бұрын

Would you really want dating advice from someone who's been married for 20 years and hasn't dated since before smartphones existed?

@ricasso777

Жыл бұрын

Rollo is married .

@bolt9110

Жыл бұрын

He can't give dating advice he's married. He can't give dating advice he's single.

@gottrekk5798

Жыл бұрын

Good point. There are happily married men with excellent dating/flirting skills. You see, you should never stop dating your wife and always be ready for dating (staying in shape, maintain attractiveness, etc. ).

Every time I listen to one of these interviews I’m reminded that as a man, I only limit my Free Will by caring about women’s preferences. When I hear “women need more” I just think “oh so they wanna control other people more”. The more details you demand be present in people, the more you’re passively limiting what they’re allowed to do in their own free time with their own free will. Women can be attractive to men without as much effort, so they get more personal free time they can spend on themselves without taking a hit. Same can’t be said when men have to have the right job the right car the right friends the right clothes talk the right way etc. because by the time we’ve culminated all that, we have hardly gotten to spend time on ourselves. Then we get sold the idea that the women are the reward for that effort when in the beginning we’re told to “do it for ourselves not for the women”. If dishonesty came to an existential end, our civilization would end so damn fast.

@nour1949

2 жыл бұрын

Beauty doesn’t guarantee marriage…. So being attractive doesn’t guarantee a man is going to fall in love with you and marry you. Which means a women requires more than beauty to live a happily ever after. Beauty requires time, effort, maintenance and money to a certain extent. And in addition to that a women has to play it right to get what she wants. So women have it much harder than men, only if they understood. An attractive man is just for one thing …. He’s just good to look at, but a man with good character and is financially responsible, easy on the eyes are the ones women desire as a partner.

@saurabhm383

2 жыл бұрын

@@nour1949 Beauty is certainly a big plus for a woman. If she is simply beautiful and cooperative, she can get a high value male to commit to her. It's not rocket science. Men need to show results, women just need to show up.

@nour1949

2 жыл бұрын

@@saurabhm383 yes but how do you maintain the relationship to the duration where you can benefit from the results….

@saurabhm383

2 жыл бұрын

@@nour1949 The only benefit a man can seek from a woman is she bares his children. If he has no interest in fatherhood, a wife is of no use to him. Sex is easily available and there is no need to commit to a woman.

@emilyb5278

2 жыл бұрын

I think it's about compromise I had a nice relationship with a man but he'd been married and told me he'd do what he wanted as I think he was a bit mothered by his ex. I was fine as I have my own interests but it got to be just what he wanted. We'd do only things he wanted and unfortunately I found it to be selfish so it ended which is a shame as if he'd been more compromising it would be still going

An alarming number of women (including this one) seem to thing that confidence somehow ethereally appears out of nowhere because you decide you have it. This is nonsense. Confidence in any area comes from repeated success. Period. The reasons that come to mind why they might thing dating is unique in this respect is: 1. They'd have to admit they reward winners and men who are already successful with women, which isn't terribly noble 2. Makes them seem/feel unique and special Oh and the "becoming numb to rejection" thing. Boy. You try that, let me know how it goes. I also have a bit of a problem, in general, with people teaching me things they haven't applied themselves. You're trying to tell me this woman approached so many guys and was rejected so much she became numb? Get the fuck outta here.

@actionflower6706

2 жыл бұрын

Fair point …”you try that yourself and let us know how it goes”…at Kezia’s expense. Fair point but slightly beside THE point. THE point might be something else. Question, does a male consultant surgeon obstetrician/ gynaecologist have any useful advice for women on the subject of pregnancy? I wanna say “yes”. Some of that advice might be “passing a human baby’s head through your birth canal is going to HURT badly.” THE point ( I suggest) is…Is Kezia’s observation/advice useful/informative? Another question…is it good or bad news? Is it news at all?

@Vladimyrful

2 жыл бұрын

@@actionflower6706 That's kind of what I'm saying. I'm disagreeing that it's useful, because I've tried it and all it did was tank my self-esteem and what little confidence I had into oblivion. Going off of your example that'd be like the gynaecologist giving shitty advice (I can't think of a good one because my knowledge on the subject is very limited). Also, medical knowledge may not be as good of an example because it has many decades of reasearch behind it, this does not. Another point here is that your example is gender limited, my example is not: she can literelly test her own theory if she wanted to - but she didn't, which a gynaecologist cannot. I don't understand the last question, could you clarify please?

@actionflower6706

2 жыл бұрын

@@Vladimyrful Let’s see if I can indeed clarify the last question Vladimyr. Question was “ is this ( what Kezia’s saying) news?” . Rephrase that: - “You kinda know what she is saying is true already eh?” Here’s a list of things that we all know, but are too polite to say most of the time 1) Sxxxt stinks. 2) Root canal surgery fxxxxxg sucks ass 3) Talking to women is ( usually) like talking to children or a hostile captive audience ( name, rank, serial number, I am strong and independent, need men like fish bicycles, am a victim of patriarchal tyranny, the sun shines out my ass, etc etc etc please go ahead and eat this bucket load of sxxxt coming out my mouth). Does that ring any bells? You know this already. It is standard stuff. It is instinctive defensive posture stuff. It is NORMAL. It cannot be any other way. All women do that all the time because they have to. Get USED to it. Get NUMB to it. Get BORED of it. The halfway intelligent ones are bored of it too. The ones who really enjoy that stuff for its own sake vs the ones who want to move on to talking some sense? There is the difference to look for. Am I any good at it? Oh HELL no. I am just too old ( and married) enough not to have to deal with it as much as you. Do not fix your self esteem to this stuff. Fix your self esteem to ANYTHING you can get to work on that does not require permission from women.

@theperfectbeing

2 жыл бұрын

Yeah penthouse level models (go look at her lingerie photoshoot pics) really don't have a hard time with rejection. The most rejection they'll get is from men saying "I shouldn't be talking to someone like you, my wife will kill me". This is a general trend with women and it's not limited to dating. They espouse a bunch of social niceties or "good ideas" without understanding the cost of what was required to come to those results. You see it in dating, social policies, sporting rules, immigration, etc. Any set of rules bounded in reality where someone else is paying the cost of what is required for the nice desired outcome. I'd go so far as to say it's the main defining principle for modern feminism. FEELS BEFORE REALS

@mrmorhouse

2 жыл бұрын

Lol I am comfortably numb. Rejection is like a body check to get you back into the game. The less you care. The more you win It is a fact. Just overcoming rejection psychologically positions you in the top 20% of Chad's. The elites. I always had success. And failure. And every failure I literally replayed the conversation in mind with my wingman. Word for word. What went wrong. How to we overcome this. What would've worked better. Why did she say that. How was she positioned. Etc etc etc. Alot if initial rejection is just a test. Girls do want to be chased. In a sense. Work harder. I used to always take down the biggest bitch of the group. Have her eating out of my hand. And my boys would come in and swoop up the hens. Lol disarm her. My own wife rejected me. I gave her my number, told her to call me sometime. She never did! I had to pursue her. Now we're happily married 12 years. This idea that any rejection is a challenge just means she wants you to work harder. This is all within reason obviously. But once you start to understand women and how they operate you can rationally come to those conclusions in real time. Rejection on the terms of certain context is obviously legit rejection. Sometimes though it's an invitation.

Approach anxiety is caused by fear of rejection/failure, but also not knowing what to say, how to please the girl, and not able to control all the random factors like her emotions, and reactions.

It's interesting that if men are interested in maximizing their odds to get what they want by superficially conforming to what women want, it's seen as predatory or manipulative and harmful to women. But when women do the same, by wearing makeup, body shaping clothing of any kind, etc, it's seen as either normal OR somehow still harmful to women. All of this in spite of the fact that women tend to be more socially sophisticated than men, and therefore, in theory, better able to navigate both sides of this line.

@GuidetteExpert

2 жыл бұрын

That is not true, just improve your looks to increase odds, thats simple. Everyone is nice and educated but not everyone is sexualy attractive.

@bigeddiespaghetti5618

2 жыл бұрын

I don't think that's an equivalent Something like women mirroring mens behaviour to become "one of the bros" seems on par with that kind of manipulation, just because in my experience that sort of thing co-insides with personality issues, disorders and polygamy

@treelinehugger

2 жыл бұрын

"women tend to be more socially sophisticated than men" Women demand men treat women in specific ways. Women are critical of men who don't master the plethora of rules and expectations of women. The reverse is not true. Men don't demand that women conform their behavior to men's desires and expectations. In the end, women do not have to learn what men desire. But men who want to be with a woman must study and master what women expect of men. This does not mean women are more sophisticated than men. It just means women are selfish, entitled, demanding, primadonnas.

@wolfsmith7285

2 жыл бұрын

@@GuidetteExpert blue pill

@bx3556

2 жыл бұрын

That's because it is an ideological attack on womens' psychology. Gender warfare targets women victims and feminists in order to weaponize them against their own country and its birth rates.

My biggest takeaway from this video is that more women need to give more men an honest chance to make their case with no preconceived notions about him. It seems like women today have this visceral reaction of disgust to a man making the effort to talk with them let alone date them. With shit like that it's no wonder why men are now thinking that women are "more trouble than they're worth".

@SebastiaanVaz

2 жыл бұрын

That's an easy rationalization to put the blame on women instead of yourself, giving you an easy way out not to work on yourself.

@davidjackson6475

2 жыл бұрын

@@SebastiaanVaz I'm not against self improvement; at least when done for one's own sake. I'm against women reaping the rewards of that self improvement when they never gave any support to or interest in improving themselves alongside the guy and his personal journey.

@mrmorhouse

2 жыл бұрын

Women do deserve to reap the rewards of that. That's the point. If a Women can convince you to work harder. Be better. Get smarter. That is wife material. This is caveman lizard brain shit. We're not equal in these terms. The risk is all in her court. There's no equality in dating and it shouldn't be.

@davidjackson6475

2 жыл бұрын

@@mrmorhouse for a person accusing me of lizard brain intellect you don't seem to pay any attention to my actual comments. I'm not against supportive housewives or partners; I'm against golddiggers abusing a man's efforts in gaining self improvement or wealth without contributing any actual support.

@Rn-pp9et

2 жыл бұрын

" It seems like women today have this visceral reaction of disgust to a man making the effort to talk with them let alone date them." The Tinder stat was dropped in the very video you are commenting on. The vast majority of women find the minority of men attractive. 80/20 rule, where 80% of women are attracted to 20% of men. This is what happens when there is no social pressure on men and women to couple up. MTGOW and decentralised, cryptographically secure and anonymous currency are the way out I think.

Get among women in an environment where it's not weird to talk or interact a lot. Low pressure so to speak. I find Tinder depressing, and my workplace is far from ideal. If I'm among like-minded women, maybe doing the same hobby it's much easier to just strike up conversation and see what they're like. If she's interesting just ask for a date, if she doesn't want to then no hard feelings. I've had 100x more success like that.

@chriswhinery925

2 жыл бұрын

It's a good strategy if you have hobbies that have a fair percentage of women. I've always been more into video games, tabletop games, CCGs and the like and, while it's not like there are zero women that are into that stuff, there are few enough of them that every one is constantly surrounded by simps catering to their every whim, which makes it difficult to approach them.

@V43xV1CT15

2 жыл бұрын

@@chriswhinery925 yeah gamer girls are a no unfortuneatly since it would be awesome

@emilyb5278

2 жыл бұрын

@Hugh Mongous I think some of her advise is OK. But I honestly laugh at anyone calling themselves a relationship expert its like a fake job like a life coach. She made good points but she also dates 18yrold so I think she may have some control issues. As a older woman I want a older man my age because its very easy to manipulate a young person and I'm not sure I'd go to a so called relationship expert who says she exclusively dates nieve boys.

@danfontaine8179

2 жыл бұрын

@@emilyb5278 well can it be only kinky? Does it have to say something about her character that she dates younger men? Genuinely asking. Also I like what the guy before you said. When learning the truth we have to see the truth of things. This is a fish teaching you how to fish lmao. You know it’s true. Her points are valid about demonstrating high value traits but if you’re caught dead actually ‘doing’ that like on purpose you look like a bitch.

@emilyb5278

2 жыл бұрын

@@danfontaine8179 I think if you say you only date very young men or women and your alot older there is a reason your dating only very young and I don't care what you do, some people do better having someone older but i still think if they are very young there maybe a control element you like. At 40 what would you have in common with an 18year old apart from sex but it's upto to the person but I'm not going to listen to a self appointed life coach who dates that young .

I won't lie, it absolutely shook me to my core when she named 'The Shawshank Redemption' as a trope answer to the question, what's your favourite movie. That's what I get for being super original and creative in my answers. On a serious note, though, it's true. I think your headspace determines social situations and whether you are playful or matter of fact. Sitting here listening whilst I carry out some chores is a different version of me compared to being on a night out a few bevs down.

@Ron.Swanson.

Жыл бұрын

I thought Shawshank was a good movie lol

@maam-yj8ph

8 ай бұрын

I would not shame anyone for naming The Shawshank Redemption as their favorite film, but I might question their sincerity if they can't explain coherently why it is their favorite film.

"Men are struggling to attract women" Part of the crisis of masculinity that is also responsible for mgtow...hard to grow a pair when your environment puts you down every time you try and take initiative(and I'm NOT just talking about women here)...not saying it's morally good, just saying given the conditions, giving up is understandable.

@Malthus

3 жыл бұрын

​@John Branoc No worries man, it was a nice read. Even as a 35 year old I don't have much experience to share besides the fact being 5"6 sucks when it comes to dating (that's if you're only focused on appearances)...but you know what? plenty of women don't care about that(I mean reasonable women not the ones you find on tinder), also all the women that rejected me throughout my life have encountered their own issues so I'm totally cool with it now! XD All jokes aside stay strong buddy and never give up, no retreat, no surrender! kzread.info/dash/bejne/loVouqqQZbSal7g.html

@mikecsernyik7360

2 жыл бұрын

Never give up.

@theperfectbeing

2 жыл бұрын

I've been on both sides of the coin. Awkward and weird when younger and then became a super fit womanizer in my 20s, right around the time Tinder came into popularity. I've seen how women both operate and taught to behave regarding sex and relationships and it eventually became so off putting for me that I abandoned the dating scene entirely and became hyper selective about the types of women I would talk to. Young men are now not only having to deal with the issues of the risks of approach but also have to compete with the fact that women have endless options and constant male validation 24/7 in their pocket through dating app. If a guy doesn't fit the bill of "perfect bf material" or "sexy chad I'm gonna have fun with", then he's essentially invisible. That means all the personal quality, skillsets and other non looks/money based qualities get immediately diminished. Masculinity is essentially shit on by modern society but is conversely rewarded sexually by women, which of course is a contradiction most young men pick up on immediately once they start dating. All of the primary attraction characteristics listed by women are high testosterone signals in terms of behavior and morphology. So having society and these useless dating gurus teach men a whole series of counter productive behaviors both in terms of attraction and relationship management is a goddamn travesty. There's a reason women only swipe right on 4.5% of men on dating apps based on the data, marriage rates are around 6% (30 couples per 1000 people) and the rates of male virginity are continuing to climb.

Chris, your reaction at 56:20 is one of the reasons I watch your stuff. Interesting guests are important, but there's so much more to it. Knowing the host is a good person makes the podcast stand out above the rest.

As a man, when you have been treated like shit and called ugly by enough women it's almost impossible for you to believe any of them find you attractive enough in anyway to go on a date with me. So the thought of doing it again and again just to get the same results is insane

@jindrichstercl2389

Жыл бұрын

I feel you my man. I don´t mean to sound preachy but go hit the gym. As soon as you meet one of your friends (or even just a person you know) after a while and he/she says "you have been lifting right?" you will start to see the light at the end of the tunnel. It will asure your that your actions DO matter and CAN change how people view you and behave towards you. Just that one comment makes it worthwhile and fuels you for years to come. At least it did for me. Cheers

@sr7893

Жыл бұрын

That IS the definition of insanity which is why you're supposed to change the variables. Either with yourself or with the women you are choosing. Change where you meet them, talk about different topics. Stop repeating the same approach. Experiment with different ideas until you find that something improves.

@gordonbecker1456

Жыл бұрын

@@sr7893 I did change I stopped trying all together

@qcriverrat

11 ай бұрын

@@jindrichstercl2389 This is really the only solution. You gotta work out, eat right, sleep well. First for yourself before anyone else.

@EmmerichHeimenbruk

10 ай бұрын

​@gordonbecker1456 "I CANT BREED" lmao, probably for the better. History is written by the bold and not the cowards who quit.

As somebody who is happily married with a beautiful daughter, obviously trying to approach women or trying to date does not apply to me anymore, but I find it interesting that she thinks that the big mistake that men make is that they don't flirt enough or don't make the conversation interesting enough, because my younger male friends who are still in the 'game', purposefully act in a 'vanilla' manner because they are so utterly petrified of being accused of harassment or for saying something 'inappropriate' and having their lives destroyed.

@TristanMattox

Жыл бұрын

Couldn’t agree more, it’s like a game of minesweeper. Being both funny and charming come from walking on the edge of being inappropriate. It’s an art to feel out where that edge is - and where changes for each woman. Safest bet is to feel it out slowly and gauge her response; a controversial joke or something not aimed directly at her. If she’s going to knowingly and unjustifiably play the harassment card then she’s psychologically unfit to even be around. It’s all eggshells and melodrama. Just pray you can catch on to it early and then let her drown in the vanilla of her life.

@PhantomFilmmaker-jd9ho

3 ай бұрын

Because you are being logical. Woman imagine this ultimate fantasy with no consequences for a bad outcome. When men do that they become sex offenders.

I think Chris is one of the best people I have ever seen in my life.

21:30 That's the realness. I've often felt like enjoying the rush from the fear of falling from a great height is more achievable than approaching a woman. Great talk, I enjoy your accent and demeanor.

@vickingvicbubble8042

2 жыл бұрын

We are all the same. I found that in my mid 30s, there was still plenty of single women. At that the women are more mature as well, and the "game" becomes less harsh. Very often single women are much less self-confident in their 30s, as men are more interested in the younger competition. My advice is to look for a woman who wants to marry and start a family. Life becomes suddenly very meaningful and real 🙂

@xavierwastaken6891

Жыл бұрын

@@vickingvicbubble8042 some good advice there

Im 24, haven’t dated since I was 17 so I’m hoping this will add additional information to what I already know

@wss33

Жыл бұрын

I’m assuming what you know is grim and dark and negative. Why would you want to confirm and enhance such beliefs?

@yofinance1777

Жыл бұрын

I’m 33, my advice. Don’t rush. Get to know yourself and what you want. Travel and invest in yourself. Become the best version of yourself mentally, physically and financially. Put the odds in your favour. All the best pal

There should be also a "rank novice" difficulty level version of the kind of education that Kezia and her peers provide. Like, not even as far as attracting women - just how pick yourself out of isolation and stop being a suicidal hermit with no future. How to interpret facial expressions and voice tones to understand what someone means or their intent. How to detect the few occasions when someone actually is somewhat interested in you for a brief moment. Some people need that "special ed" level tuition for fundamental interaction skills.

@kalash_nikov

3 жыл бұрын

Agreed, but that's not what she's doing. If we think this way then every type of coach should educate people on every aspect of life - PTs, dating coaches, confidence coaches, etc. It's all interconnected. And to a degree caches should be able to identify those areas that are most lacking, but it's not their job to coach and educate on all these aspects, it's pretty much impossible to do (properly) for one person or a "system".

@nixonagnewreviews7206

2 жыл бұрын

Man i felt this.

@burtbiggum499

2 жыл бұрын

Thats what a therapist/psychologist is for my guy. If you have health insurance you need to find one asap

@beaterbikechannel2538

Жыл бұрын

Let me take a guess........it comes at a price?

@undefinedvariable8085

Жыл бұрын

@@beaterbikechannel2538 It comes with practice. Spoken of another way: exposure therapy.

I saw a girl who looked like she haven’t shaved her legs for years. She was gorgeous and then I saw her legs and since then I started picturing women bald and things like this. Never been intimidated by women since. They’re just humans.

@peripheralparadox4218

2 жыл бұрын

I imagine them as gay guys stuck in women’s bodies. Absolute turn off. Helps alleviate the desire!

@stevengruber57

2 жыл бұрын

Only problem is now you're not attracted to them 😂

@Nah-ah

2 жыл бұрын

Yes, women are human lol 🤦🏾‍♀️🤣

@aks1993kumar

Жыл бұрын

I didn’t understand what you just said.

@thetruthwillsetyoufree9209

2 ай бұрын

I did the same in business meetings. I imagined everybody as a chimp 🐒🐵

Not gonna lie I’m getting mad anxiety just listening to this podcast!

@Jason-wm5qe

2 жыл бұрын

Bro, it sounds like you need some deliberate exposure

@thijsjong

2 жыл бұрын

I can only be me. I believe this is called being your own mental point if origin. If someone does not like it or does not like me I have no problem with that.

@supersonicguru1

2 жыл бұрын

@Lewis Wood I actually been "contemplating" on "why not just be evil?" If you're "evil" , you could easily get money and power, and therefore get sex. But the only answer other ppl reply with is "plz don't be evil, me and my family exist" , which means people care more about themselves than their fellow man "failing" in some extent. Just a bad penny for thought. Yes I'll always choose to do good. "Do good for goodness sake", but if most men's "motivation" is "for their family" , and a lot of men aren't having families, what purpose or drive do most men have if they don't have a family? We are slowly increasing the odds of "bad things happening" with this social predicament in our society not being looked or cared for seriously enough.

@rjflores438

2 жыл бұрын

I you are living in the UK and your social status isnt very high, do not approach English women, they will immediately be able to sniff your value and social status in the hierachy, even if they do it unconsciously, they dont care about connection, love or romance, just your social status, your height, whether you look like a male fitness model and your bank balance, thats it.

@user-tj5di9kv1u

2 жыл бұрын

Same ! 🤣

The approach anxiety and not knowing how to go from talking about the weather to something romantic is similar to sales, or evangelism where I want someone to give their life to Christ. Any process like this I'm trying to memorize everything from open to close and I'm too in my head to actually be in the moment.

@CommandoMaster

2 жыл бұрын

It's also the prospect of being rejected by a girl and knowing you aren't able to pass on your genetics.

Girl: I love dogs Boy: Wow, I love dogs too! Girl: I love cycling Boy: Wow, I love cycling too! Girl: I love you Boy: Wow, I love me too!

@JDWDMC

9 күн бұрын

Nah. You just say, "I know."

43:00 "Facts don't care about your feelings." Thank you for stating such simple things.

this wasn't dating advice, this was hookup advice.

@indokenmore

9 ай бұрын

Couldn’t disagree more. Confidence in yourself, holding meaningful conversation while keeping it light, funny and genuine… after 8 years of marriage, my wife and I continue to work on these things with each other… especially as stakes get higher and problems get tougher. I’d argue it’s even more common to start putting on a filter with the person you’ve been in a relationship with for a long time. These skills and practices never lose their importance in a relationship.

the worst anxiety i have can be explained with a story that happened to me: she started talking about this friend of hers. who has a feminist struggle. she likes to get impregnated and dump a guy at month 8 of pregnancy. she's pregnant with 4th. she is struggling to get that recognised as legit feminism. i've a paralysing fear of such women.

@empathyrebel

3 жыл бұрын

Such fear is not carved in stone! Just think about what could possibly be the worst case scenario. Learn to minimize emotional costs. Like: You don't freak out about spam and delete your email account altogether, you just delete the spam with no hard feelings and go on.

@TraditionalAnglican

2 жыл бұрын

That sounds wonderful & pleasurable if you’re more into getting laid than getting married nor having a long-term relationship.

@vickingvicbubble8042

2 жыл бұрын

That is legit psychopathy and cruelty. She enjoys crushing young men, and somehow thinks she should be praised for her cruelty. And then "legit" first wave feminists don't understand why more and more people believe that Feminism is a crass, selfish, entitled and hateful movement.

@LucielStarz123

2 жыл бұрын

@@vickingvicbubble8042 honestly that’s no different than physically abusive men who preys on weaker women.

Part of what I took from this are that alot of women are attracted to the type of guy who is the least likely to put the most into a relationship because he has options and other girls are going to try compete for him, seems like a doomed formula as guys are easily temped. The most loyal honest guys will be overlooked for a risky guy.

@derekrodrigues6890

3 ай бұрын

Women are more tolerant of cheating than men are. Women rather take that risk and share a high value man than settle for a lower value man. I think this tolerance of cheating and sharing also is why it seems women have more bisexual tendencies than men do. They had to sexually share their man with other women throughout history

"If you're a good guy, just be a bad boi in bed" I'm still trying to just get them there first

@ 22:00 I get this existential fear when I'm about to approach a girl and if I miss an opportunity to get her number(or just get the conversation started, OR EVEN JUST INTRODUCING MYSELF) I kick myself afterwards because its been 6 years of being single and missing a small conversation is like missing the one thing that I've dreamed of everyday for so long. Just a potential conversation means so much.

Listened to this podcast bc I’m curious about many different perspectives. I respect Kezia for standing by what she believes but just wanted to say that I do not feel represented by her description of „what women want“. I could never respect a partner (or even a friend) who played games with me. It’s a turn off. Know who you are and what’s important to you. Don’t lie. I promise, you’ll be heads and shoulders above most men (and women).

Here are some recommendations for Female dating coaches that are men. Matthew Hussey. Probably the most famous female dating coach. He sells out conference halls all the time and women generally love his message. Stephan Labossiere is a relationship coach and I've listened to him once and he's done a good job bridging the perspectives from both sides of the gender line. Kevin Samuels is an image consultant but has gained a recent large following explaining to women what a high value or top 20% to 10% man looks for in a woman.

According to tyler rsd, no one gets laid more than a nightclub promoter. Instead of listening to kezia, I’d like to hear from James how to get into the business! The 18yo who said ‘Women are far more trouble than they’re worth’- that is pure gold!

38:50 you can see Chris facepalming in his head by the look he gives and the sip of his drink afterwards 😂😂 immediately I saw it bc I felt the same.

@jwortman1984

Жыл бұрын

Yeah she was not on his level. At all.

This was interesting to watch, and fun to hear what's going on with guys. You could talk to Mathew Hussey to hear how he is coaching women, and what women want.

@ChrisWillx

3 жыл бұрын

That’s who I’m trying to contact!

@71Siddy

3 жыл бұрын

You can do it! Just look at how your subscribernumber has grown since this spring@@ChrisWillx

@TechOutAdam

3 жыл бұрын

1. What women say they want is never what they respond to. 2. Women don’t know what they want that’s why men have to lead lol!

@mrdee2454

2 жыл бұрын

His a grifter. Blaming men to 99% female sub base for easy cash

@Nah-ah

2 жыл бұрын

Yup, I enjoy Matthew Hussey’s content! He’s always spot on with his insight. I hope to see him and Chris have a chat soon!

The key to communication is the art of conversation

This change from communicating in real Life is great for us older people. Even the worst of us now look like we got good game, when interacting in real life!😂

I think one of the biggest problems with modern dating is meeting people in bars and clubs. I’ve gone into those places and tried to have meaningful conversations and it’s borderline impossible. Those venues seem to be all about thrill and pure flirtation fueled by alchohol or drugs. I met my wife over a conversation about the nature of the human condition while we were looking at a Humans of New York book on a coffee table in an office. If you’re looking for a real person and you haven’t been able to find one then maybe a bar or club isn’t the place you should be looking.

@undefinedvariable8085

Жыл бұрын

You're really only attracting a certain "kind" of person from these places, and I would say if you're looking for a long and committed relationship you're not going to find it there.

@dominicvaldes5890

Жыл бұрын

You are putting “meaningful conversations” on a pedestal as if its the end all be all, and clearly superior to all other forms of interactions. Don’t get me wrong, there is a time and place for it, bit its not at a club or bar when people are trying to enjoy themselves. Don’t use it as an excuse to not develop the skills of playfulness and increasing social energy.

@user-tx4wj7qk4t

2 ай бұрын

​@@dominicvaldes5890there is nearly no room for that in a bar or club. People just go there to bang

I love the way Kezia is sticking up for the pua guys. You should interview toddvdating, Nick Krauser or TomTorrero.

@billsimms2511

2 жыл бұрын

Kezia is great. I bet many women do not like what she is saying lol

28:00 Oh boy this conversation reminds me of this one girl. I’m in the uk and I met this one American girl, everything went so well for a few days. Until one day I asked her if I could help her to carry her massive backpack that’s been slowing her down. She got really upset with me and said she can handle it herself just fine. This was a few years ago and nothing materialised after that few days. Now that I think about it I’m glad I dodged the bullet.

Interesting video. I always had fear of rejection issues, so never asked a girl out in person. Luckily the Internet hit when I was in college and dating sites appeared shortly after. My wife of 16 years actually initiated the conversation with me (this was just before smartphones). Hopefully, I never have to start over and try to get over that fear of rejection with women. I am pretty sure I would have a much better tolerance for it now though (still might take a few tries).

What it really comes down to is if you, a man can carry a conversation you got your foot in the door. If you can’t, like myself, you’re out. You just have to face that fact. After high school I did my own thing. I’m shy and introverted. All the women I had a relationship with asked me out. Not bragging but that’s what happened. I never even noticed the women that asked me out. I was told that was part of their reason for their pursuit. 🤷‍♂️

@TraditionalAnglican

2 жыл бұрын

It’s been a long time since that happened to me.

@Broniath

2 жыл бұрын

I get constantly stared at by women I don't even know, unfortunately never got asked out. I am very tall and a very intimidating person in my general demeanor, so that's probably the reason. I can't really help it though I have social anxiety and while I can navigate most social situations, I tend to be very curt and my face always looks like I would tear your head off if you talked to me because being in social situations is just a painful experience lol. I am the complete opposite when actually in conversation, but for that I would have to initiate conversations myself which is hard. :/

@alelectric2767

2 жыл бұрын

@@Broniath Ya had the same problem. They said if looks could kill I’d be in prison. Haha. I’m not tall so maybe I was more approachable. After those relationships broke down I carved out my own life without them.

@Broniath

2 жыл бұрын

​@@alelectric2767Yeah, that's what I will have to do, I hope I will get more sociable once I am out of Uni, having the freedom to just sit in my room alone and study has not been kind to me.

@super8man807

2 жыл бұрын

I could've written this. I've never approached a woman, any relationship i've had started with her asking.

When you see expired milk at the counter, inform the customer service representative immediately. Be a responsible citizen.

@AtheismF7W

Жыл бұрын

Lmaoo

it is what it is, one side all expectation and the other all the effort

@0MoTheG

Жыл бұрын

Women would claim that they make the bigger effort because they have to do more to be good looking.

@SoloRenegade

Жыл бұрын

@@0MoTheG a few hours to look good temporarily, while men have to work physically and/or mentally hard their entire lives to get/keep her.

@0MoTheG

Жыл бұрын

@@SoloRenegade By the age of 40 few women have much to offer. She can't leave for another man by then.

@SoloRenegade

Жыл бұрын

@@0MoTheG few women have much to offer by 25 these days. Women leave men after age 40 all the time.

We are increasingly living in a matriarchy. Women have been making the rules by which men are told to abide. Problem is, these rules are making everybody miserable, including the women a lot of the time...

@viralt487

2 жыл бұрын

women too proud to admit when they are wrong. 40+ year old women and 50% of them single is a disgusting stat to think about when half of them have kids and need a father.

@vickingvicbubble8042

2 жыл бұрын

@@viralt487 What you wrote is true. Feminism fought for women's rights. Great stuff in the 70s, but today more and more rights come at the expense of children, and increasingly men as well. Feminism did not know when to stop and many countries in the North of Europe are best described as Matriarchal today, and not egalitarian and it's a shame really...

@editor7354

Жыл бұрын

@@vickingvicbubble8042exactly

I would like to thank Kezia Noble for the line "Now I know why I like you...". Deployed it on a date tonight and landed perfectly.

As someone who dated men and women I can say that everyone tends to be easier to engage out of the club. I think if you do things like an art class or walking group you get an easier way to chat and you can tell if someone likes you by her eye contact and smiles etc and don't go for someone who clearly isn't interested obviously. I found that humour with girls work the best and not coming on too strong and be confident and have good posture. Hold yourself confidently. With men literally wear something with your boobs out lol. I've met loads of nice dudes walking my dog. Girls love dogs get a puppy cause all women will stop you and go awww. I don't know why I'm giving advice I've been single for ages. ⁹

@Enrij

2 жыл бұрын

Maby because you have had too many? If you only had one lets say, it would be more special. pair bonding issues in these situations are common in people. Not a fact, but something I heard.

@emilyb5278

2 жыл бұрын

@@Enrij the only thing I would say to a young version of myself is concentrate on establishing yourself in terms of career, home and self esteem develop into what you are interested my early 20s I spent with vapid vain people in clubs who didn't really care about me, I found out by pursuing my interests that I was far more deeper and intellectual and made new friends and started my own path but it took me a long time to stop worrying about what others thought. In terms of relationships I'd say don't waste your time with one night stands and focus on building healthy relationships to learn more and be able to have long term relationship rather than being selfish and running away from them because you have to learn how to be in one it doesn't come naturally. I'd have less sexual partners as it often leads to feeling empty even tho I don't regret exploring my bi side tho I would not want another relationship with a woman it taught me how to priorities my pleasure when being intimate. Also ditch the porn as it ruins intimacy.

@emilyb5278

2 жыл бұрын

@BPJ I don't think I was privileged no I think its about going out and enjoying life without needing a gf. I'm not saying back when I dated women I was not attractive but I was never like really hot but I had alot of personality and I could make people laugh and I was fun and prob faked being more confident than I actually was but I still got the odd dirty look off a girl and things like that. I think anyone can convince themselves that it's too hard to attract someone and you have to be really good looking but I don't think that's the case , obviously no one wants someone who down on themselves and negative.

@emilyb5278

2 жыл бұрын

@BPJ and I never pulled everyone I liked I just got involved in conversation and usually you'd get someone who liked you but certainly not everyone. I got rejected but I always thought they don't know me I don't know them so it's not a big deal. But I also think things like reading having something to engage someone with is important. I can talk about alot of subjects and I'm not super intelligent but I can add to a conversation and that's important too. It's really not about looks for most women , it's about sex appeal but you don't have to be a Chad or whatever unless you want someone who looks like a model then you might have to be more Chad like but most women even good looking women prefer good banter and humour and someone who has interests.

@emilyb5278

2 жыл бұрын

@BPJ if you really are struggling getting a girlfriend I know women love authority figures like police or fireman or army, if you really struggle join something like this and put the uniform on and you'll have no trouble meeting a girl. Or be in a band lol or box all these type of jobs attract women because we like authority and men with power and status. I don't mean being a millionaire I mean doing jobs like a mechanic plumber ,all these are hot to most women.

Chris I just discovered your channel this week and I was about to suggest Kezia as a guest. I took her Acceleration Course online during covid lockdown and it was well worth the money. I learned more about myself and relationships in three weeks than I learned in three years of therapy. She and her team are really good at what they do and won't let you give up on yourself. Highly recommended.

Interview Alexander Grace on the topic of Dating, And his perspective/observation of female psychology and dating make lot of sense.

I've approached probably a couple hundred (maybe even a thousand at this point) girlst, and she's actually spot on with her diagnosis of the issue, and how to actually improve.

Men fear rejection because it CAN end in a broken nose, jail or even death.....Very few women can consciously acknowledge this, just as they refuse to acknowledge their power in general. quite a good bargaining technique!

@CommandoMaster

2 жыл бұрын

BF be crazy these days. Just for approaching a hot girl with a crazy BF u are fked!

This offically the best podcast

I've been on a taster 2 day course with Kezia a couple of years back. She's the real deal. It was so much fun. Thanks Kezia!

@VaGuS343

Жыл бұрын

@ponds andlakes now I'm triggered 😂

So get rejected like crazy so your numb to it, then become a Master conversationalist. WTF 12 minutes in and I'm Done!

@theperfectbeing

2 жыл бұрын

What's ironic is that's exactly what is taught to men in the manosphere and pick up artists alike. Outcome independence is the term they like to use and it's actually a very useful skillset to develop. I've actually had women change their minds after the fact because I'd ask them out, they'd shoot me down but I'd just keep on talking or go about my business at the party. It would throw them off, especially once you start getting positive feedback from other women. Dating for men is kind of like calculating a batting average in baseball. Even if you're only hit 25% of the swings, over time that produces impressive results. I used to get asked all the time "How the hell do you always have women around, gfs, friends with benefits,...". They only see the women with me, they didn't see the other 30 times I got shot down that month, got stood up, ghosted, etc.

@ryans3795

2 жыл бұрын

She is from the wrong Era and wouldn't want to discuss online dating. The world has changed and since I have moved a lot I spend my time online with friends rather than on physical locations (saves massive money and time). I am one of those people who are very shy at first and get wild once I'm comfortable. This is I don't become comfortable with everyone. To me, a women has to give me a hint she's intrested and I will approach, mindlessly approaching and asking every women isn't right. The thing most women don't get is the guy who is upfront, especially at a bar or a club, does not want a lasting relationship.

@omarcomming722

Жыл бұрын

@@BOZ_11 Complete dogshit. If you are a man, you're only speaking for yourself

“Girls don’t want to be with a guy who doesn’t have other options.” = Hypergamy.

@danielwake2430

2 ай бұрын

Pre-selection

Many are finally able to numb anxiety right before they delete themselves. The quite before the storm.

This was a lot of fun!

Would be good to have Coach Corey Wayne on the Podcast, would be an interesting convo since he's very psychology/why humans behave the way they do type for the dating world.

@hitbyligtning9661

Жыл бұрын

Coach Corey Wayne IS FANTASTIC ... HE'S UP FRONT & ON THE MONEY ... I LEARNT HEAPS MORE FROM HIM THAN ANY OTHER COACH EXCEPT FOR JOHN ANTHONY LIFESTYLE!

@rhenriksen

6 ай бұрын

Ditto. Kezia is interesting to listen to... But I think Corey has a tighter handle on the core concepts and can verbalize them concisely.

I followed this woman about 10 years ago. She looks completely different. Night and day.

@rbol1965x

Жыл бұрын

Just come back in another 10. And bring your beer goggles!

@michaelk4740

Жыл бұрын

How did she look before?

Thank you for the amazing content!

The less-heavily made up look is dynamite for Kezia. Keep it up, madam.

@jamesburton9708

3 жыл бұрын

Exactly! At first, I thought this was a video of her from YEARS ago!

@jamesburton9708

3 жыл бұрын

@john Smith She's a woman, bro. They're ALL like that

@mrclean4400

3 жыл бұрын

Yes she looks less tartish

@bawseeeee602

2 жыл бұрын

simp

@YadraVoat

2 жыл бұрын

*This* look is "less"? 🤨

Man. Its good to see Kezia Noble. She taught me so much back in the day. Thank you so much. I hope she's doing good.

I disagree with her method of having canned lines to say during the start or "approach" phase. This is far too inauthentic and thought-dependent. I acknowledge she said "clever guys" should stick with "no plan". I believe there IS a way for the "un-clever" to still go in without a plan. It's to study and practice "Emotional Intelligence"-like areas. Look for "Nonviolent Communication" by Marshall Rosenberg or my book, Practical Empathy. I recommend this approach to dating success because it goes deeper, to the foundations of a person to transform yourself into someone who's confidence comes from a deep authentic wellbeing and intuitive knowledge/feeling of how people ARE.

@kylehoward2400

Жыл бұрын

Agreeing with you about working on foundations instead of memorizing lines. I'd rather spend my "study time" on self-growth that happens to enhance my dating prospects AND other parts of my life. Where can I find your book? I don't see it on Amazon.

I have worked out if I am thinking about the process of attraction and having to be this, or that... then I walk away. I have made the mistake of not being authentic for the sake of beauty. I will not be anyone but me. Relaxed and natural. To go out of my way to impress someone is immediately unauthentic.

As a guy with life-long social anxiety, this has been too difficult and painful to navigate. I really need to stop listening to this for my mental health, actually.

Remember, you don't need a fish telling you how to catch a fish - Patrice O'Neal

@GalacticWoman

3 жыл бұрын

You do :) She has insights no man can have

@melonasks7041

3 жыл бұрын

Not a good analogy unless you want to trick and harm a woman.

@christophermirkovich7290

3 жыл бұрын

Amen

@astrixx

3 жыл бұрын

If you learned the skill and actually got good with women, you'd know she's spitting truth. Who cares whose mouth it comes out of, as long as it's true.

@i_kill_for_zardoz

3 жыл бұрын

Most everything she promotes is in line with the top male PUAs, so you can be pretty confident it's solid info. She's actually pretty red pilled for a woman when it comes to dating, but a lot of guys reflexively shit on her because she's a woman and shows off her tits, even though the advice is generally solid for 95% of men.

PLEASE do not listen to a word a woman says when she is giving dating advice on how to date or attract a woman. instead LOOK at what they do.

You asked - so here are some of my notes. Approach anxiety - she is totally correct about men being afraid to approach even if it is online. Through the years, I have had to do my own 'numbing of my fear of rejection'. I have had to become the approacher. but then i'm beginning a relationship with a guy who has anxiety problems, so it's a catch 22. That anxiety makes it difficult because as Kezia said, us women are looking for more than looks, to be attracted. Also, that anxiety will usually show up in a relationship as needy and predictable. Conversations - you can tell the men who have had a lot of platonic conversations with women. Men need to have a more well rounded friend group, and how to find common ground. But that takes maturity that women are worth your time even if you don't want to sleep with her. Dating apps- yes it is putting the cart before the horse. you are getting to know someone BEFORE you get a sense of who they are physically. If I like someone I will have a video chat. It cuts through the bull for free and you don't waste time. I personally always make any approach from a guy in person, a pleasant experience even if I say no in the end. I appreciate the effort because it isn't something enough people do anymore. BUT, as a result, I need to be with a boyfriend secure enough to know, even if I'm talking to another guy, I'm going home with my boyfriend. Women sometimes act like jerks because their boyfriend will flip out.

@jeanne8395

3 жыл бұрын

@@cordfortina9073 Women know a guy likes them when he has no problems showing he likes you (being vulnerable), and says he would like to take you off the market as an objective. but if she just wants to sleep with you, I agree competition can be a game played.

@jeanne8395

3 жыл бұрын

@@cordfortina9073 It's funny but dating coaches are just therapists with a purpose. It's a good idea, but for the most part they work on you and why you make the choices you do. I know I aggressively worked on myself, when I realized I had a pattern of failures, or cycle when dating. I hope it goes well

@timothyblazer1749

3 жыл бұрын

I've had 6 serious relationships, including one 10+ year marriage, and have dated well over 50 women. I also have a few female friends whom I have never slept with. Treating women platonically is the number one way to create options, both social and sexual, for yourself as a man. It also will allow you to create non sexual social relationships with women, and will build social proof. At some point, the women you know will start throwing other women at you because you are "such a great guy". Because you are. :-) Point being, refusing requests or demands isn't being a "bad" man. Treating women as people is the right way to go, and if a person (woman or man) doesn't like that and tries to shame or manipulate you, then you need to cut them off. If you do this, over time you will tend to be surrounded with good people, male and female, who have your best interests in mind. Just stay vigilant, stay cool, and never let anyone tell you that you "have to" do something which is clearly not in your best interests. That's really all it takes. No need to be angry or blustery. Just firm. Be willing to leave. Be good. That's it! Jeanne, I'd be interested in your take on this, as we do agree on at least one point!

@jeanne8395

3 жыл бұрын

@@timothyblazer1749 i definitely agree. Women are people. There are good and bad. I found if I was seeing the same type of people I was dating, I was doing something to only see that type. I think you have a great formula in general for people. No matter if it's friends, or girlfriends.

@TimpBizkit

3 жыл бұрын

I think in my experience if a woman made the first move it would have gotten me over the hump and I could reciprocate with confidence after that. But as with any things in life I have to take action myself rather than waiting for others to do it for me if I want results.

41:35 so true. Everything after 3am was called "doing left overs" in our group of friends, haha.

41:04 so true, I literally used to feel repulsed when when women showed too much obvious interest towards me. I always wanted the ones who seemed a little unsure about me. Looking back, that feels so stupid but I guess it’s just human nature.

@ItsGrantM

Жыл бұрын

And if you are competitive in nature, you will want to prove to them you have value and that they should be interested in you. And that isnt always the right thing to do, or the most productive.

``...from school.`` i actually snorted my coffee

If I go out to a club which is rare by the way, I don't want to meet new people. I just go there for a little something to do after a nice dinner for a bit of fun! I like to have a look around, enjoy the music, have something to drink and perhaps do a bit of dancing and chatting!

Watching this video reinforced to me what your friend's son thinks. They're really not worth the hassle.

23:12 maybe the fear of being called a pervert because of an overcorrection from me too movement and the like have made men feel more scared?

Unfortunately, most women do not provide very good dating advice because they seldom understand or are unwilling to acknowledge what really attracts them. Men who are successful at dating women usually offer much better advice. IMHO.

The 2 guys I did date before I was in my long term relationship were approached by me, or got an very direct verbal sign of interest. The first guy got scared after the first date because I was to maculine/lead to much. I would say Kezia is right with saying, the guys might find it "cool" if they get approched by a girl or going out with a masculine woman (only inpersonality :D) but you must show them your feminine side if you want a relationship. So my second relationship was 6 years and my current is proably 16 years. Doesn´t mean I know what I am talking about but maybe an interesting exsample.

@youtubesucks2755

2 жыл бұрын

lol the lengths you women go to to avoid the pain of rejection

@MuhammadAliGOAT

2 жыл бұрын

the guys were not scared that you were too masculine, they were repulsed because you were not the feminine female they thought you were. just saying, no offence or nothing.. there is somebody out there for everybody though - I am also the same, I am naturally masculine because i'm a straight man but when I have been on dates who have more masculinity than feminine then its so repulsive and off-putting.. I never even message them back after the first date because I know every second longer is wasted time both of us would never get back by trying to let her down slowly

@MuhammadAliGOAT

2 жыл бұрын

@@youtubesucks2755 HAHAHAHAHA, have to admit this was my instant thought too. LOL - it's always because the other guy was not good enough... yeah right, lmao !

@samplentertainment58

2 жыл бұрын

I respect that you did the approaching but to make it perfectly clear to you, the first guy didn't get scared, he wasn't attracted to you anymore once he got to know you a little more past your looks. There is nothing... "cool", hot, sexy or attractive about a woman that has a masculine personality.

@Jonathan-Pilkington

2 жыл бұрын

@@MuhammadAliGOAT You clearly dont understand the subject. I'm getting strong incel vibes from you.

I know if I could just get to a date, I could confidently have a great conversation but approach anxiety turns my brain off in some way then it makes me look so stupid.

Where was Kezia 20 years ago when I needed her? 😭

I haven't seen the video yet but a wise man once said, "You don't ask a fish how to fish, you ask a fisherman"

"Don't chase women. It makes you ineffectual and weak. If she's interested she will make the first move 100% of the time. Indifference is a powerful aphrodisiac." - My Dad

@tesla5297

Жыл бұрын

It doesn't work like that in the 21st century 😂😂😂

@MeneerHerculePoirot

Жыл бұрын

@@tesla5297 Social mores may change, but gender dynamics will never change. It's hardwired into our DNA. Buying into 21st century PC mentality is a fool's errand.

@ericdoolin6808

Жыл бұрын

Sometimes but not 100% of the time lol

@MeneerHerculePoirot

Жыл бұрын

@@ericdoolin6808 Nope, if she wants your interest she will make it known to you. First by subtle hints like body language and subconscious things like curling her hair with her finger, leaning in when you speak, watching your mouth, bumping into you, etc. Then if you're slow on the uptake she will make it more and more obvious until you can't miss it. Some women don't waste time. But, if they're interested you will know it 100% of the time. That's biology, bruh.

She can say what the heck she wants, approaching a lot to become numb, and then approaching a lot to get positive responses, is a hell of a lot of time to waste when something else could be done to be more productive in general.

The reason why men fear rejection, and I quote from another channel: If she's not interested, she's basically saying 'I don't want to mix my good genes with your bad genes' so it's in your best interest to protect your self-worth. Otherwise, we would have men running around hitting on women in all directions, which has never been the case.

I love dogs too! & yes confidence, lack of self-worth, overthinking, worrying about boundaries & respect, ... Men (myself at least) grow out of those by achieving things, aging, following their goals. I wonder how women can find guys that spend their time on dating apps, attractive. It can consume a lot of time which points to a guy with too much time on his hands? I understand students often have that time, are younger, maybe less confident and possibly haven't achieved much yet. So they might benefit from these dating apps. Dogs can work a miracle on boosting your confidence by leading them, taking on responsibility, having purpose. Also leads to conversations on regular basis.

very interesting, this episode has shifted some of my perceptions on the dating world

Good podcast 👍🏻 Just a suggestion for another guest, Rollo Tomassi who wrote the book The Rational Male. That would be a great insightful interview and discussion on Red Pill theory, dating, attraction and Hypergamy.

@ChrisWillx

3 жыл бұрын

I’m trying to get him - our schedules don’t align too good though. Eventually!

@TheRobbo007

3 жыл бұрын

Modern Wisdom fingers crossed then!🤞

I do not trust anyone giving dating tips that don't talk about female craziness or female red flags. Women are complicated and far from perfect. Anyone that doesn't talk about how women have all kinds of unrealistic expectations or how they're hypergamous comes across as disingenuous. Sure, she's right that fixing approach anxiety and becoming a good conversationalist is important, but there's way more to it.

@ZaidIsm007

2 жыл бұрын

And she says things like "blind leading the blind"...

She touches upon my main sorrow at 15:10. I've tried to become the person like the one I'm looking for as a partner. I've been training, studying and working hard all my life. As a result I am in a really good position and it is easy to make connections with people. But the wast majority of people I meet are not like this, or at least not to the same degree. For women, it's either intelligent or smart in most cases. Very few have both. I feel that men have to achieve more in order to be percieved as valuable. I'm sorry if this sounds misogynistic, I don't look at men romantically, maybe it's the same, I wouldn't know. So the question becomes: How does one find a highly driven, successful, intelligent and beautiful woman?

Get Matthew Hussey on! He's a dating coach for women but his advice can be applied to men as well 💪

As the saying goes "never take a woman's advice on dating women"

@ethan4879

2 жыл бұрын

When she said men love to chase and a girl to play hard to get she lost all credibility. It went into negative when she talked about picking up men under 18 because "they love it"

@melindawolfUS

2 жыл бұрын

Only men who make money selling dating advice say that, lol. Women are typical better communicators. Plus, doesn't it make sense to find out what women want so you can deliver it? Like doing market research in business Plus, you don't need to appeal to all women, we each have unique needs and tastes. Just befriend and ask the women you like and learn to meet her emotional needs.

@mitchlatour1932

Жыл бұрын

@@ethan4879 Only simps chase women, men pursue them

@aks1993kumar

Жыл бұрын

@@melindawolfUS Women don't know what they want. As usual your advice is garbage and will lead to failure. And 'befriending' a women to get sex/form a relationship is also somehow considered creepy by feminists - not the reason I disagree with it. It's just a wuss method to come through.

@MaddBadgerr

Жыл бұрын

@@ethan4879 Plenty of young men would happily spend a few nights with an older woman like Kezia Noble (if she's attractive), but she's definitely wrong about men enjoying the chase.

This lady talks about her platonic discussions with men. It might be platonic for her, it is just restrained for the men.

I'm saving up for my next trip to the Philippines.

I remember this girl from several years ago on KZread. I didn’t even recognize her here. She looks so much different. She looks like a different person.

Why would I want to "attract" a female? I'm the prize, not her. I've worked from the day one to acquire everything I have, and everything I've made of myself. Nothing has ever been handed to me. My life is stable. My house and car are paid off. Almost my entire paycheck goes into my checking account and I can buy anything I want. What is a woman bringing to the table other than her child-like emotional issues and a list of demands? The social contract between men and women needs to be renegotiated from zero. Men have built everything in this world, and we should give women nothing.

@ShivaShaktification

10 ай бұрын

Boom

It is morbidly interesting for me to listen to this. I can't remember the last time I had a legitimate conversation with ANYONE beyond the weather and the odd sporting event. More on topic, I'm 43 and I've never been in a relationship with anyone. I had some friends in high school, but since then, there hasn't really been anyone who's eyes didn't immediately glaze over when I started to say anything about my hobbies or interests. Certainly nothing romantic. Women have never really wanted to anything to do with me, though it's not like I've ever been able to tell. Subvocal ques and body language elude me and my resultant social skills have basically rendered me a hermit. I have one epiphany in my life, and it is this: I'm an overweight, unattractive, low income, uninteresting, increasingly intellectually deficient, easily frustrated and quick to anger(if only for a moment) old man and any woman I might find interesting would be far, far better off with anyone other than me.

@keenkreationz4652

2 жыл бұрын

Fix that attitude man then things may fix themselves

@nixonagnewreviews7206

2 жыл бұрын

You're not alone dude. Many in same situation out there. It's tough.

@lorzon

2 жыл бұрын

@@keenkreationz4652 This "attitude" is a personality borne of a lifetime of being a hole in space where a person should be. Very few people I grew up with had consideration concerning me at any point. I was never invited to parties or anything like that. To put it in no uncertain terms, aside from family, I've been alone nearly my entire life. I mean why would I inflict myself on other people and make them feel uncomfortable or threatened by my fumbling attempts to socialize?

@keenkreationz4652

2 жыл бұрын

@@lorzon Because it's your duty to do that for yourself man; face what is tough, face your fears. I know it's an incredibly frightening proposition for you, and you'll most likely make a fool of yourself for the first few times. But charisma is learnt, and you learn through your failures. What would you rather have; living your current life, cursing and diminishing yourself for not being social or a life of challenge and growth, where yes, you will make a fool of yourself initially, but in ten years time you will thank yourself for having had the courage to say ''Just fuck it, Ima try and dig myself out of this rut". It doesn't even have to be big, just start saying hello to people on the street and smiling. Systematic desensitisation. Then maybe join some sort of club e.g boxing whatever tickles your fancy. Charisma on command and dozens others have loads of youtubes videos on Charisma, a skill that can be learnt. Look to new horizons man, it is never too late until you're six feet under homie. Much love

@michaelfern4079

2 жыл бұрын

lorzon Well you’ve got nothing to lose. I’ve never met you but there’s a helluva lot of good looking, rich, smooth talking wankers who are having lots of kids, making the world a rougher place. The comment from the guy above is right. You’ve got a duty to do. Get yourself in shape, get a job (if you don’t already have one), and work at it as far as you can go, read, watch, listen And talk, talk, talk. As it stands, you’re going to be this way at 80, so what you got to lose? Do it for a year and get back to us or write a book about your experiences, even if ultimately disastrous. Books on why what experiments fail is very useful. Go for it. 👍❤️🙏

In my experience, whether men come up to you or not can depend upon which city you're living in, or which part of the country. In the US, I've found men in Portland, OR to behave very meekly. When I moved out here from North Carolina, there was a precipitous drop-off in men approaching me, to the extent that I thought I must suddenly turn green when I go outside or something. And other women I've spoken with who have moved here have said similar things. I've actually spoken to men who have moved here from NYC or DC and they've been amazed at how many dates they get because they aren't afraid to approach a woman, and they later learn that women here are dying for men to step up. I have taken the lead, for those of you ready to pounce on that angle, and that hasn't worked out for me. I leave town enough to have experienced that basically as soon as I get out of Oregon, men start approaching me again, so I know it's the guys here and not me (not always, anyway ;)

"Winners never quit, and Quitters never Win. But if you never Win and never Quit, you are just stupid." - Demotivational Series Poster

The difference between how picky men and women are when approaching each other is biological. Woman have more to lose during sexual encounters I.e. pregnanc/ taking care of the child. Men on the other hand have the option of not having an emotional/ physical connection to the woman or the child. Birth control and social norms are slowly changing this I believe.