It makes so much sense, but I still don't have the felt experience of it. 😞

@untangle-your-mind

6 ай бұрын

That idea comes from the mind’s perspective. To the mind, there is no felt experience of "it". This is a dead end because the mind doesn't feel anything! The mind is what is being felt...by you. So, shift the perspective and question what is it like to be you? Feelings come and go, and are part of the mind, so you're not looking for that kind of a feeling. The peace I talk about is not a feeling. It is just the backdrop to the mind, like silence is to sounds, or stillness to movement. Always present and known as soon as there is a bit of backing off from the mind. It comes naturally from the understanding, from being clear on your identity, because that realisation brings detachment from the mind.

I'm curious, and confused about something.. It's not the direct point of this talk, but connected to it. It seems like love is often described as being something very fundamental to Reality. Not as something that is done, a movement, but the nature of Reality, often blended with the quality of 'unconditional'. I've had three direct experiences of sudden awareness of not being one with that which I was looking at, but being that which appeared to be 'Hannah' and 'the other thing'. These was were very matter of fact experiences. No emotion at all, no love, no feeling at all, barely any movement other than presence. The weirdest thing was, in looking back on it afterwards, that it was even possible to still say 'I ' had the experience, and yet it was possible, somewhat accurate. Where love has come into experience/awareness .. well actually that's hard to say, I'm not sure. Where a sense of connection has been? A personal sense? In the initial awakening experience where boundaries, one by one became apparently not so, love grew until the boundary of this stream of experience, awareness OF, became apparently not so as well, and 'disappeared or blended' back into Reality/absolute. And the fact there was no experience there terrified the experiencer, despite the fact that as far as experience goes, at each 'dissolving' of a boundary the experience of love grew, and despite the fact that it _seemed_ pretty apparent that whatever was beyond 'the experiencer/experience', though unknowable in terms of experience, and therefore indescribable, could best be pointed at/described as wholly love? Wholly loving? At least.. It felt that I 'dissolved' back into the Love that 'I' was, and so it struck me as strange that 'I' could be so terrified of it.. terrified of my own Reality.. Though now I actually think about it, I think there may have been, in fact, the sense that love was the last boundary to go, the last experience before 'beyond-ness'. (Just.. beyond the knowable/experiencer). Hmm.. Well.. I can see how I would have blocked that aspect, blurred it. I needed faith in love being an intrinsic part of absolute reality, despite still never fully having it (faith in love being 'the absolute' Ha Ha.. ) outside of the golden light-tinged experiences. Otherwise, I can see love and hate being intrinsic parts of experience, relatively real but not Absolute. So these different experiences confuse me. Even after all your talks, which have explained all my experiences to me more clearly, Love still seems very ambiguous when paired with Reality and the experiences of awareness with no personal sense. Less so now, after seeing that first experience a little differently. I have a sense of sadness still that love might not be fundamental to the absolute, but just to me in some way.. yet that is not terrifying as it would have been. Hmm. I'm not sure if I'm actually confused any more, or just a bit in denial! Can you clarify this at all Nabeel??

@untangle-your-mind

6 ай бұрын

Love comes at the first step. Before that, there is just the Self. Aware, but unaware of being aware, because there is nothing to be aware of. This is Ananda, the peace that is intrinsic to the Self. I also call this the "fulfillment of love" because this is the union yearned for in love. To be together forever, in peace. With the first step comes the knowledge of being aware. Not as a thought or sensation, but as love; the unconditional love to be. The love of being. This is how consciousness emerges. So love is the seed for the mind and the world.

@hannahlily11

6 ай бұрын

Oh.. Oh. So much here. I feel pretty emotional actually, like this is so beautiful and I feel joy but terribly lonely. I think I'll leave it and look again later, and see what it really has to say, when there's not so much sorrow and I can hear better. Thank you for this answer, very much.

@hannahlily11

5 ай бұрын

It just occurred to me that it seems like what makes the absolute scary to the mind that is imagining it, is that it can't picture timelessness. "Together forever in peace" sounds delightful, nicely dual without the pain, discord or loneliness. But inserting time into oneness, even when adding peace to the picture, still sounds lonely. Hmm.. Now I see why a course in miracles emphasised how the mind tends to mistake 'eternity' for endless time! Ah, loving on the Heart Sutra right now!