“You can be the ripest, juiciest peach in the world and there’s still going to be someone who hates peaches” 🧡

@SpiritMover314

Жыл бұрын

Well, I like sweet peaches only!…Does that matter?…🤔🤷🏽‍♂️👍🏾😂😂🍑

@m2pozad

Жыл бұрын

@Khalilah D. True, but that is so irrelevant to this video.

@FemaleAchilles

Жыл бұрын

Everyone hates something, and we have to accept it. We can't change them, nor force them to change their opinion. Everyone has a special someone out there, and some people just haven't found that "special someone" yet. 💖❤✌

@m2pozad

Жыл бұрын

@@FemaleAchilles Sounds nice... But, Some are just meant for the single life. I think we can all agree on that.

@FemaleAchilles

Жыл бұрын

@@m2pozad You've got a point. But someone can be single and have a very close friend they consider as family. Like I said before, Some people just haven't found that "Special someone" yet.

Took me 38 years to find the one. Stop trying to make each person “the one” and be ok with the wait. I promise, it’s worth it. I’m happy in ways now that I never felt were possible. I literally feel like I’m having a sleepover with my best friend every night of my life. You deserve, and you will find this.

@Rattynattynat

Жыл бұрын

Not everyone will find this but it’s amazing that you have 💛✨

@hwcjvanbeek1

Жыл бұрын

It took me almost 32 years. It was one of the most difficult things to find. Be very patient.....a lot of people find the one after thirty.....or later. You will be extra extra excited if you finally find this person.....So extra thankfull then because it was personally my biggest struggle....

@darynagorska655

Жыл бұрын

I'm almost 44. I am a single mom of 2. Hope I will find the one, but if I don't I'm happy anyway

@trophyscene5015

Жыл бұрын

The one for everyone may be alive at the same time in the same universe for us all. But in a lot of cases it doesn't matter, because "the one" is in another country somewhere, possibly speaking another language, and we don't know about their existence because it's simply impossible to know.

@nataliiasvitailo3838

Жыл бұрын

Hope, your partner feels the same

“Stop trying to find the right person; be the right person. Instead of being with someone who makes you happy, first be someone who makes you happy.” - Jay Shetty 💛

@khalilahd.

Жыл бұрын

Love this 💛

@mymentorjane6705

Жыл бұрын

@@khalilahd. me too 😎

@raven_chan3714

Жыл бұрын

Even as a person who hasn’t engaged in any romantic relationships before, I can relate to this.

@brooke3265

Жыл бұрын

what if you have been the right person for people your whole life? whats a healthy balance

@mymentorjane6705

Жыл бұрын

If you don’t mind me adding my 2 cents, I think it’s about not trying to “be” someone for anyone else but who you are. That doesn’t mean you don’t change and grow. But the goal isn’t to please someone else but to be the best version of yourself.

0:50 They want to change you. 1:28 You can’t count on them. 2:00 You have different values. 2:48 They can hear, but not listen. 3:36 Your intuition. 4:10 They are fond of ‘You’ Statements. 5:05 Your close ones can tell.

@NetchoCheese

Жыл бұрын

Oh wow you were quicker than me

@Raghav-tx6ym

Жыл бұрын

@@NetchoCheese Yeah I don’t know how that was possible.

@sweedelnishadsa

Жыл бұрын

@@Raghav-tx6ym 😂😂

@NetchoCheese

Жыл бұрын

@@Raghav-tx6ym XD

@khalilahd.

Жыл бұрын

Thank you!

It’s ok if some people don’t like you. Not everyone has good taste ❤️

@shakurwonders5216

Жыл бұрын

I needed this hype

@arianagaider3348

Жыл бұрын

😂

@sportsfanjw559

Жыл бұрын

Ayyyyeee I'm using this one 🤣👌 thanks

@milothecat4288

Жыл бұрын

People with Corona:

@SunIsLost

Жыл бұрын

@@milothecat4288 what

This part: COMMUNICATION IS TO A RELATIONSHIP WHAT SUNSHINE IS TO A FLOWER! So good

@_zephyr_kun_

Жыл бұрын

Exactly

@TheLastEgg08

4 ай бұрын

But when you communicate and the other is just hearing not listening and don’t come with anything of substance, they are not the one.

@arpitsharma4735

2 ай бұрын

So true !!

@UwemAkpanTV

2 ай бұрын

@@TheLastEgg08 That's valid. Though some people do not understand communication and the art of it. So I would suggest if the person is teachable and willing to learn and accept their mistakes to communicate better; then, that could change the paradigm in the relationship and make the person become a better partner. But in the case that they aren't teachable, they definitely aren't the one. One piece of advice I heard about communication is, listen to understand not to respond. I had to work on myself in that regard because sometimes listening could be hard since we're not naturally good listeners, so the trigger to respond is there. But when we learn to listen to Understand, that changes everything and even makes us better. Some people just don't have the bandwidth to listen to their partner, so they just hear and wait to respond to the part they picked.

One of the biggest red flags is when they talk bad about ALL the exes. If your new spouse constantly criticizes all of their "crazy" ex-lovers, it's a solid indication that they are the issue.

@madwheelsgaming2360

Жыл бұрын

I learned this the hard way

@khalilahd.

Жыл бұрын

So true!

@melaniethetruckdriver

Жыл бұрын

Can confirm this one 🥴

@birdvert

Жыл бұрын

Totally accurate!!! I also learned this the hard way! Took a few times…. 🙈

@kinglunarchy9417

Жыл бұрын

It depends! All of my exes were abusive in some way, some more than others. I didn’t have a solid partner until my current one

I watched this video because I was scared I was blind to see what was to come, but I love how my partner and I watched this and paused to make sure these weren't issues. We talked for hours just watching this video and I feel so much stronger in my relationship and I can't thank you enough

@emsipems

Жыл бұрын

That's a really interesting way to help with communication, and especially that you can watch it together without judgement and really meet eachother for each point! 👏 I'm inspired.

@cyxaindion5727

Жыл бұрын

omg I'm jealous!! So happy for you and your partner 🥰

@Cblakely88

Жыл бұрын

This is beautiful. I want to do this with my partner but I want them to really listen and not just say, “you think I’m not the one?” Maybe that in itself is the reason that she isn’t….

@afrinakhanam4696

Жыл бұрын

Two of the 7 things matched. My BF broke up with me last night. It was a shock and bolt from the blue. I knew he wasn't the right person but still went on with him since he was a good person. We never fought, we had respect for each other. Last night, he told me he doesn't love me anymore and he thinks it's not right to be with someone who he doesn't love. But he wants to stay friends. Idk, what to say or feel. We had been together for 10 months, and I was even planning to celebrate our anniversary. He did it less than 2 months before I am graduating, which is causing me further stress. We ended it amicably, but I think it was very inconsiderate of him to do this right now before my graduation. And I also don't know, if it would be a good idea to stay friends with him.

@Faildude15

Жыл бұрын

@@afrinakhanam4696 that's harsh homie, but in the long run it'll be better for you

There is no such thing as the one. There is compatibility and communication, and a willingness to nurture your and your partner's thoughts, feelings, and desires through the years.

@msmara554

Жыл бұрын

But not every person is able to give you all of that + be attractive to you + have the same life goals as you... They didn't mean "the one" as in soulmate - but the one you're going to be able to not doubt and be happy with in the long run

@j_u_ss_y

Жыл бұрын

This

@wordzmyth

Жыл бұрын

A lot of these factors are actually about identifying compatible and committed people who value you. So it is not really rhe one, but a compatible and connected one something we need to be too.

@diegoapalategui579

Жыл бұрын

THE ONE is a femenine dellussional quest. Men never search for the one, we want a good one.

@_Kandis

11 ай бұрын

YOU’RE ALL WRONG.

I have to say I thought about breaking up with my boyfriend a few times when we first started dating, I'd say 70% of it was my attachment issues and anxiety about healthy relationships. The other 30% was just us being different personalities and struggling to become accustomed to each other and communicate in a way both of us understood. I don't have those thoughts anymore and I'm very glad I stuck it out, we're at 1.5 years and planning on having our families meet soon. If you have thoughts about breaking up every time you get uncomfortable or argue and you aren't in a toxic relationship, then it might be on you and your issues and not them and the relationship. Being uncomfortable is necessary for change and growth and if you have a good person than it's worth it to push through, communicate that you are struggling but trying to adapt and a good partner will help you through it.

@yestrech

Жыл бұрын

I need this advice so much. :(

@moss6235

Жыл бұрын

This is so helpful. I’m in a lovely relationship rn that generally feels healthy, but I get so anxious about them being right for me when we struggle. Nothing has proved my feelings to be true.

@Cece9090

Жыл бұрын

@@moss6235 It does get better! It did take us having a serious emotional talk after my anxiety was wearing us both down, it was like a flip switched and it's so much better. We are both happier and more positive about our relationship and communication has gone up a lot.

@Cece9090

Жыл бұрын

@@GrapeSkoda You have to ask yourself is she showing a capacity to change and it's just slow or is she falling into the same habits and patterns every time? I know my boyfriend supported me despite my craziness because he saw and knew I was actively trying and it was showing slow but real results. There have been set backs but we are both aware they will happen and are temporary. We are coming up on two years now at this point and starting to save up money for the future steps in our lives. As for compromise, he is an introvert and I am an extrovert. We have different social energy levels and it's been rough but we both have time consuming hobbies so we are able to balance our together and alone times better. It isn't easy but it's rewarding when we get through it.

@Cece9090

Жыл бұрын

@@GrapeSkoda I'm sorry, I wasn't trying to presume you weren't working through it with her. Someone who lets their friends decide their decisions for them is not someone that will be a good long term partner. It sounds like ending it really is the best case for both of you guys. You don't need the toxicity of her friends and she needs to realize that maybe she is creating a self-fulfilling prophecy for herself.

The worst part is when you feel like you are out of breath when trying to tell them anything because you know they aren’t listening.

@hoodrat8346

Жыл бұрын

Feels like talking to a wall!

@katsuamla

4 ай бұрын

Cause they just don’t want to listen and know exactly what they are doing

My ex used to block me out whenever I try to explain my perspective and he would always ask me back “Why should I understand you? It’s not like anything will change.” I also couldn’t share any of my bad days with him because he’ll get upset that I “ruined his day”. Looking back there were so many red flags that I chose to not see and I’m so glad I gathered up my courage to leave him.

@kitkat615

Жыл бұрын

@@CorvetteLife lmao

@kitkat615

Жыл бұрын

@@CorvetteLife are you the ex? 😂

@assajoda3907

Жыл бұрын

@@CorvetteLife yeah but she's the main character of her life so.. and i can see that they just don't match so it's a good decision.

@karencanispeaktothemanager5340

Жыл бұрын

im going thru the same situation. whenever i confront him about this, im like “ i dont feel cared for when u do this. id appreciate u listening to me and making an effort to get to know me.” he just kind of says “no i do but i dont see the point. it’s not a big deal. i love you. mwuah.”

@TiffanyNguyen

Жыл бұрын

im happy for you

"The heart knows when the search is over" - Kermit

@joanabatista8374

Жыл бұрын

My heart knows nothing. I can't see a clear future but I also don't want to let go.

@franchesco7757

Жыл бұрын

Is that after or before the divorce with Mrs piggy?

@guzelfetkulina9599

4 күн бұрын

😊

It's hard when you go from being SO convinced that you've found your person, only for you two to grow apart rather than grow together. 💔 We just couldn't get passed our mistakes & heal. I still miss him every single day.

@VinceUOIT

Жыл бұрын

Feel this big time

@jazzymarie5515

Жыл бұрын

I miss him but he cheated and were still married 😭

@naypo231

Жыл бұрын

@@jazzymarie5515 same for me, I caught her in bed with another man on the most important day of my life (my last chance to get into medical school). I am completely crushed, I was absolutely sure she was the one.

@ridhita7151

Жыл бұрын

Felt this very strongly. He was not the one, and we grew apart to the point that I had to pick up all of my pieces that he kept taking from me. I left him a month or two ago. It hurts so much to know we won't speak anymore and talk like we used to. I suppose it's better that than losing myself to a man who didn't love me all the way.

@pabixiao

Жыл бұрын

Kind a same, but I don't miss her cz she doesn't miss me either

They don't want to be with you. Sounds stupid but a lot of us chase people we think are the one, but who don't feel the same about us. The right relationship is reciprocal. We all deserve to be loved fully, and the world is an abundant place. If this 'the one' doesn't reciprocate your love, there are other 'the ones' out there for you that will, and those are the relationships that really thrive.

@phatcat3705

Жыл бұрын

People really NEED to know this. Even though this should be "common sense," for those many of us who grew up witnessing generational dysfunction, we develop a warped idea of what "love" is and don't realize that it's really infatuation/obsession, which are completely different things. When I was still in my early-20s and younger, I honestly thought that it isn't "true love" unless it was dramatic, unrequited and that one of us got hurt. I never truly even had a crush on anybody, because, since I never got positive attention at home, I would "fall for" anybody who was nice to me at my vulnerable moments and assume that it was "love," nevermind that I wasn't attracted to them or even knew anything about them. I remember stalking the people I supposedly was "in love" with, and even when they got fed up and rejected my advances repeatedly and absolutely, I refused to take "no" for an answer, until my obsession died out and somebody else was nice to me and have that start over with them, and I honestly could NOT take a hint, much less was aware that what I was doing was harassing them and hurting their loved ones, too; the only time one of these targets gave me a chance, since they were "empty" and from a similar background, too, I found out that I disliked literally everything about this person, to their life goals and something stupid like their taste in music nor found them attractive physically, but was hung on the idea of "being in love," and tried to change them into my image, which only frustrated and disappointed us both so I called it quits within weeks and ghosted them. Of course, it applies the other way, too, that I ended up angry and hurt in the process, and learned it the hard way only years later, by accident, when I found out that the way I grew up is not normal. People need to work on themselves and, also, consider what sort of life situation we're bringing a potential partner in BEFORE considering entering a relationship if we want it to be a stable one. Even though my sister's crushes were reciprocated, they were likewise based on "because you were nice to me" rather than actually liking the person for who they are, so no surprise, every one of her relationships end up being like this, with her wasting years of her time failing to change her boyfriends (and she's with yet another new boyfriend, probably another re-bound considering that it happened so close to her last breakup, and praises him to the skies, but, sad to say, due to her track record, we're skeptical). She still hasn't figured out, yet, and we're worried because we know, unlike me, that she wants to get married and have kids, and concerned about her age.

@jujai.akainu

Жыл бұрын

If “The One” doesn’t exist, where’s the Story & Movies come from? I believe in True & Unconditional love. I will always love her no matter what, we will always in love eventho we’re not together. You’re not in love if you can replace your love, sorry to say.

@monk4ever

Жыл бұрын

People chase the dumbest things.

@peachxglass231

Жыл бұрын

i really needed to see this

@kitkat615

Жыл бұрын

​@@phatcat3705 Thank you for your thoughtful and well written comment! I can relate alot with the "infatuation/obsession" cycle and it feeling like real love. I also really liked that you brought up your sister's plight with the relationship drama as well. I personally don't have any sisters, so I cannot relate with anyone on any kind of developmental milestones within my own family heritability within relationships. Your honesty on what it is like to be dysfunctional and not realize it, is someething else that I can relate to alot. I'm really glad to hear your words shared on the topic, thank you :)

When this came out, it helped solidify my decision to leave my fiancé. 5 months later and I have no regrets.

@qwertyuiopqwertyuiop-bb4mi

Жыл бұрын

So happy for you!! :D

@brightpulse384

Жыл бұрын

a 6 min video lol

@Nice-sm5hr

Жыл бұрын

@@brightpulse384 five months later and she has no regrets so obviously something wasn’t right

@tigros999

Жыл бұрын

see that's just fickle.

@danimoonie

3 ай бұрын

Funny, I had a relationship fail because 1) we respected each other and encouraged each other to obtain our goals, 2) we communicated well, and would talk about where we stand and how we feel, 3) we were tolerant of each other's bad days. The reason it didn't work was because we both recognized from all this healthy work that we couldn't be together as we were. Our futures were too different and we couldn't figure out how to combine our lives. We are still good friends, and sometimes one or both of us want to get back together. Until we have the same path, we just can't do it

@iAmPesukone

6 ай бұрын

This sounds like you have a solid friend in a person you initially sought to be partners with. I'm happy to hear you recognised your differences and remained close friends. People like that aren't too easy for anyone to find.

@frant1cOne

6 ай бұрын

@@iAmPesukone staying friends is the problem. We both still have feelings so things get heated every few months then we fight then we stop talking. It's pretty toxic sometimes.

To me, having friends is way more important than having a boyfriend/girlfriend, husband/wife, etc.

@luna84_

Жыл бұрын

Agreed

@yesninja9615

Жыл бұрын

That i totally agree But When they get busy with their own partners And in times of need You might need someone to rely upon

@newsjunkieish

Жыл бұрын

Friends and a partner are two completely different category of relationships. You cant build a life with friends.

@honda_maniac

Жыл бұрын

@@newsjunkieish probably is the view of a single one, who was single forever, I thought the same when young and no gf 😂

@marksallai2289

Жыл бұрын

they say friends are for life but it is not always the case - your best friend is you

being with the wrong person is so traumatic... I hate relationships because they hurt so much

The thing is i feel i can't trust my intuition because i struggle with attachment/trust issues and im always worried that things could fall apart every minute. I notice i'm hyper alert and feel alone even when we're supposed to be connecting to the point where i'm beginning to wonder what the added value of a relationship is if i always feel kind of stressed. When i'm by myself i actually feel more okay than in a relationship. last couple weeks i just feel like shit. I'm doing my best to keep at it but it won't really go away.

@kayprism

Жыл бұрын

Read the book Attached. Sounds like you are Anxious Avoidant.

@invisibleeinkk

Жыл бұрын

This is an exact description of what I’m currently experiencing wow….

@msdemeanour

Жыл бұрын

See a therapist. You have anxiety issues, possibly caused by trauma

@TheWilDOn31

Жыл бұрын

That's exactly exactly my case! That's why these videos and a lot of other information on the internet is Not Accurate and actually damaging for me. But I believe it's not accurate in general because these silly signs is not what a relationship is. I believe I am anxious avoidant, and I agree with another comment here that says you could be too. In my case it is definitely because of trauma. Therapy is my advice too. There's really nothing like finding a good therapist. It has helped me very much. I finally trust now that life can be good for me. I'm not afraid of the future, of life as I used to be. And in terms of relationships, the power is within you - however you'll make it is how you'll have it. That's why you need to work on yourself, focus on your own doing, your own actions, your own feelings... and much less on whatever craziness is constantly happening around us... I really don't know how to explain this, but you will find your own answers once you begin to receive a perspective from the right therapist for you. I was lucky enough to find a good therapist from the start. Go to therapy with an open heart and mind, ready to be honest, and willing to resolve the issues once and for all. Best of luck to you! Hope you find your peace. You deserve it.

@leilale4305

Жыл бұрын

You could also watch Thais Gibson on KZread, she has videos about fearful avoidant/anxious avoidant

7 Signs They’re Not The One ---------------------------------------------- 0:50 1. They want to change you. 1:28 2. You can’t count on them. 2:00 3. You have different values. 2:48 4. They can hear, but not listen. 3:36 5. Your intuition. 4:10 6. They are fond of ‘You’ Statements. 5:05 7. Your close ones can tell. ------------------------------------------------------------------- Hope This Helps :)

“Using honest mistakes to make negative judgments about you” you just described my partner’s behavior perfectly.

@ginthemaid112

Жыл бұрын

Umm... Why are you still with them? It's best to break the knot, but that's what I think. You do what helps you.

@pooscifer

7 ай бұрын

What was the "honest mistake"? Sooo much finger pointing in these comments; very little personal accountability

Re: friends/family’s feedback, if you’re an empath who unknowingly surrounded yourself w/narcissists, you can bypass their feedback. Speaking from experience, when I was in a bad relationship, many of the people I had in my life at the time kept trying to force me to stay, for various reasons, but including control. Trust your gut/heart/soul/intuition first, as the video says. If you aren’t happy, don’t let others try to convince you that you are. In the long run, you’ll end up getting hurt and those same people won’t help you put yourself back together.

@lucylulucifer

7 ай бұрын

Right. Most of my family don't really know me at all. And so many of them have toxic & abusive relationships and marriages. So yeah, listening to family won't be best for everyone. Trust your gut first and foremost

Don't ever change things, when they won't meet you halfway. You have a right to be happy. You have a right to feel good. You have a right to be yourself. Don't be like me. Don't lose sight of who you are.

@wordzmyth

Жыл бұрын

I hope you have gained yourself back again.

@GreenSonic4975

2 ай бұрын

you're right, lately i've been checking on this girl from another classroom (which is my friend) but i don't think she may be interested in me, first time we interacted she asked my phone number, we have trust each other and share some interests, but i just don't think she may be the one, she goes to other classrooms to salute her friends but not me, only looks for me when she needs help (which is not alot but thats the only reason), if i don't talk to her first she's not gonna start a conversation and on top of it, when i ask her about something i told her, she invents excuses

there was someone who said you can love someone but it's harder to find someone who will love you back

I feel like this can apply to friends too in a way, I have had friends that want to change me, won’t listen to me, etc. Granted, friends are the only basis I have to go on.

@HannahMarieee

Жыл бұрын

I totally agree, its very similar when we’re looking for good friendships.

I wish everyone good relationships ☺️♥️

I believe the biggest mistake is due to our capacity to cope and accept certain behaviors, like a frog that will jump out of hot water but if slowly bolted will remain... Setting proper boundaries and upholding your values and principles can get blurry sometimes. Appreciate the content and all the work you put into soothing and improving our perception.

There is a big difference in trying to change someone to become what you want and trying to uplift someone to become an even better person for themselves. This can get crossed up easily and make it seem like you are unhappy with the real them, when in reality you love them but would love to see them become even better and know they can do it. Personally I like when my partner pushes me to become something more. It keeps me from getting to comfortable and stagnant. On the flip side, others felt like I was pressuring them to push themselves and change. Change can be great even necessary but it depends on how we look at it.

@pooscifer

7 ай бұрын

there are wayyyy too many self help youtube things that act like expecting your partner to mature, develop into the person you think they could be, develop into the sort of person with whom you could responsibly raise a family with etc. is some kind of crime. the solution is always "label them a narcissist and breakup!!!" - no wonder so few people have committed relationships that help them grow together. most people are too self absorbed to even want to grow together

@lijohnyoutube101

2 ай бұрын

@@poosciferI tried for almost 20 years and poured love and support into him. However he WAS a narcissist and so damm broken from childhood trauma all he did was destroy me as a person and ruin our children’s childhoods. I should have NEVER married him.

Every time i encounter myself on a bad day, think about something about relationship, you came with a video explaining exactly what I need, thank you from the bottom of my heart.

@Psych2go

Жыл бұрын

I'm so glad! We hope this video helped you! Did you relate to these signs?

@cleisons.2736

Жыл бұрын

@@Psych2go yes, some of them.

@chimitrey08

Жыл бұрын

yes same here a little spooky but good lol

@heatherfulmore3412

Жыл бұрын

I never give people a list. They know when they are doing wrong.

@Will-cj8vp

Жыл бұрын

no

They say "the grass is always greener on the other side" but the grass is greener where you grow it - love yourself and work on yourself. That's all we can ever do.

This is a good list if you happen to be securely attached, which, let's face it, not many people are. And there is no The One. If you happen to be avoidant in your attachment style, two to six months in, you will feel unfairly criticised by the smallest requests. Your autonomy will feel threatened by any of your partner's suggestions and you will always feel like they cannot accept you as you are. 'That's not me.' is your go to phrase and you will question whether your current partner is the right one as a routine exercise, looking for the smallest faults that prove they're not. Your intuition will always tell you to run and quit before you're being fired and you will never actually commit to them. That's because you're terrified of intimacy because it never felt safe. You fear abandonment and rejection and any kind of compromise feels like losing your sense of self. The good news is that this has nothing to do with your partner, no matter what the video says. The bad news is that it's something you need to work on and heal, there is no The One who will anticipate your every need without asking for anything in return. If you happen to be anxiously attached, you will never be The One for anyone until you learn to be enough for yourself and are able to walk away from people who are emotionally unavailable rather than spending every waking moment obsessing over them, trying to be someone you're not to please them, and never voicing any needs because you're terrified they'd walk away. You don't have to change to be loveable but you will be abandoned if you choose to be with avoidants. Heal yourself and find someone who will invest in a relationship rather than being in love with the idea of one.

@_.ihavenolifeyay._

Жыл бұрын

My boyfriend is like the top one on this text and I'm that bottom/lower text part and we are struggling :(

@alexblainelayter7703

Жыл бұрын

@@_.ihavenolifeyay._ I'm sorry, it's not easy.

@_.ihavenolifeyay._

Жыл бұрын

@@alexblainelayter7703 yeah😔😔

@suicidalalien6298

Жыл бұрын

Considering the only people that are ever interested in me are ugly creeps, rapists and pedos... no. I would never want to be "enough for myself" or "love myself" if that is all what my romantic options are going to be for the rest of my days.

@alexblainelayter7703

Жыл бұрын

@@suicidalalien6298 ​ Insecurely attached people are attracted to insecurely attached people, it's about being attracted to what is familiar, even if it's bad for us, and what we are lacking (e.g. one person's selfishness may be attractive to a people pleaser). By healing the wounds and filling the gaps in one's life, one is no longer attracted and attractive to insecurely attached people. By learning and seeing one's own worth, one will no longer tolerate bad behaviour out of some mistaken belief that this is what one deserved. So you may find that learning to love yourself will open up a lot of options.

Over 6 years in, in a marriage I didn’t even want in the first place, with a narcissistic husband. I knew he wasn’t the one, he used to be..then he took the mask off and was somebody I didn’t even know. Now I’m stuck. Be careful with your heart and don’t let anyone push you into anything you know you don’t belong in or want ❤

@ladyfl0wers

Жыл бұрын

You are not stuck...get out! ..it will take effort but it's doable!

@carriesaundersson

Жыл бұрын

@@ladyfl0wers i cant financially survive on my own. I'm unable to work a full time job and I have nobody to help me. So I'm stuck here until i find a means of supporting myself unfortunately

@susanmcmains8593

9 ай бұрын

I was there, he had drowned me in financial debt. And tho I'm still struggling with getting my emotional &; financial back on track, I don't regret getting out. Not for a second! I know, had I not gotten out, I very well may have died. (Literally) Please, for your OWN mental & physical safety, find a way. There is a way, it may be hard, but it IS doable! You are STRONGER than you may think at this moment, it's within YOU, FIND IT. Love & light.

@rosalindhayes1363

9 ай бұрын

Yes everyone is right! I just recently divorced after 18 years of marriage it took 8 months. I sold my house and moved out while he was at work and only left what he bought. He tried to destroy the house. I nearly lost everything. The house was in foreclosure and selling at the same time. It was by the grace of God. I made all the decisions and paid mostly all the bills. My ex husband did the bare minimum and often stayed out with friends all the time. He never compromised or was willing to work on himself, not emotionally available and brushed everything under the rug. 🎉🎉I’m so glad I’m free. I’m struggling financially at the moment because of him and he got some of my retirement money but you can’t be peace. I will recoup what I loss later. But no more trauma. Make your plan for escape tell no one. Praying for all women in this situation.

@rosalindhayes1363

9 ай бұрын

@@susanmcmains8593❤

It absolutely sucks when you're fully committed but they seem to hold back.

@Ohkeh640

Жыл бұрын

Please don’t stay

The truth is, we are all sometimes selfish, unresponsive, or cold in relationships when we should be mutual, responsive, and loving. Sometimes it's not the relationship that is bad, but the things that are going on in one or the others' lives that can make the relationship rocky. I lost a very close family member and it's put me in a deep sadness and depression, and while my loved one tries to be there for me, and I know that they too have their own issues and stresses, and that is normal. As long as at the end of the day, we are on the same page, it's a solid relationship.

In terms of changing someone, I believe it depends. Are you changing them in order to improve the relationship? Or are you changing them just for your sake and not considering how they feel? It also depends whether they want to change or not. Like, for instance, with my boyfriend, he wants to make the relationship better for me due to my past toxic relationship, so he's told me to let him know if he does anything wrong, so he can improve himself. Like, I've asked him to remind me that he loves me, to have him reassure me, or to tell me where he's going and when he'll be back (cuz my "ex" went offline for a long time without saying anything and I always assumed he khs). I ask him for quite a lot, which I feel bad for cuz I think I'm asking for too much, but he's assured me that he doesn't mind it, and that I'm not an inconvenience for him.

@jasminet3419

Жыл бұрын

He's a gem.

@reddbull3876

Жыл бұрын

U seem like your the issue, what you bring to the table?

@Phoenixguy357

Жыл бұрын

ignore the hater^ this sounds like a solid relationship if youre both happy with it :) i have been pushing my gf to change for the past 3 years. but that change is only in terms of the relationship (learning better communication skills etc) or pushing her to be a better version of herself (encouraging her to deal with her mental health issues)

@iiantixsocial

Жыл бұрын

@@reddbull3876 Why would I be the issue if he's completely fine with it? You know little to nothing about our relationship, and you know nothing about me. I was very vague on what I meant by "I ask him for quite a lot", so it's very bold of you to assume I'm the issue. I'll have you know, I bring as much to the table as he does. Not only that, but the things I only really ask of him is to help ease my anxiety in certain ways, and to not do things that would trigger me due to my past toxic/abusive relationship. If you don't believe me, I don't care.

@archigal

Жыл бұрын

YES. My boyfriend changed, he started doing drugs so of course I'm encouraging him to stop. I'm reminding him of how consequences can ruin our plans for the future.

I don't know how I came across this channel (probably my phone listening to me) but I'm so glad i did. I'm going back to therapy for trauma that's made me isolated & only reliant on myself. I've been in a relationship for 9 months already & I'm always doubting it because i don't believe I'm capable of being loved. These videos help me realize he's being honest with me, that i can trust him & ways to avoid being the nagger or crazy one. Thank you Psych2Go!!

Man.. I really needed this. Had questions, arguments, friends opinions ugh.. its so weird the timing this video being posted accordance with things occurring right now in my life, its crazy lol Constant doubt, questioning my actual where abouts, I must not love him if... going through my phone, just things I shouldn't have to have him do.. and I see these good things about him .. and he acts out like that. "I just care about you so much" like .. you don't do that to people you care about. Figure out your hurtful past & understand the people to come next ain't like the ones before. Oh & we only dated "officially" for 2 weeks .. dealing with one another for a month.. give or take. Keep the strength & thought you will walk away & you will eventually..

@evo683

Жыл бұрын

I'm in the same situation with this video coming in an eerily good time. I'm currently in a situation where I can get into a romantic relationship with a girl I have crushed on for almost 3 years now... and now I'm a bit concerned. My friends and family have showed some reservations about this person and some things she has said to me, and I'm constantly second guessing...

"Corrosive Criticism". I REALLY like that phrasing. I might need to use it in the future.

had a boyfriend for couple of months, of course the first two were magical, then our flaws and differences started to come up, i know its normal but.. we were so different, the only thing we liked doing together was watching TV series, he was the extrovert, constant need to be in touch with people, always talking about the people around him, going out not only in the weekend but a lot, i am the introverted type, seeking for peace in life, tea and deep talk in the evening, definitely not party type. Then things started to go down cause he turned out immature (was couple of years older than me), failed his semester, didnt talk to me about what i did wrong, basically his life was a mess and i got really concerned, tried my best to help him, but he kept to go out and basically forget about his problems… i got honestly tired of the mess, i couldnt handled his life anymore. i left 10 days ago, sent his things back with a letter that i am doing this for us to get a chance in the future to be happy with someone or just be happy, cause we cant give it to each other. he wrote a text basically ruining me for leaving when he wanted to HELP ME. I was sick and tired of the manipulation and for that one time i gave up. i do love him so much, but im not for him, he is not for me, i am fighting now for our better future but not together. If you will ever read this i did it cause of the true and sincere feeling i have for you. just please, take care of yourself, be happy.

It is true both ways for me. We've tried for almost 7 years. I'm a highly sensitive person, I noticed it earlier on, I've told her years before, even the people around her have told her, but I stuck by because she doesn't want to let go, because I felt responsible and guilty (due to being a HSP) & in a way to try and help her transition. This year, she's beginning to understand after years of trying. She did go and meet a therapy and helped her a lot. I myself feel like I'll need to go through therapy to keep on supporting her. It just wont work when you're just built differently & the love is not there present for both. It is something that can't be forced even if you want it. It breaks my heart either way. My mental health deteriorates as well.

Idk if I ever will find the one tbh. I’ve been through a lot. When I grow comfortable with someone I open up but not a lot because I know the outcome. Every time I say something that happened in my past, they give up on me. This has happened 3x in my life. Sorry for the rant. I just feel like a not a lot of people I’ve encountered understand mental health. Have a blessed day 🙏

@moneytime1556

Жыл бұрын

I with you. A lot of people not aware how mental health plays a role on relationships. How can you make a relationship work when someone emotional,physically abuse you and don’t attend to your needs. I learn a lot of people are attracted to people that can’t give them what they want. But at the same time you can beat it with awareness

@mymentorjane6705

Жыл бұрын

It’s hard to know when to reveal the most personal details of our lives, especially the mistakes, sins, and failures. I’ve been there too. I overshared and too early in some relationships. So I decided to wait until I observed how the other person reacted to others’ mistakes. Did they gossip, condemn, etc? We’re they able to extend grace? I’ve learned it’s also helpful to get to know more about how they were raised. I started asking questions like, “How did your family handle failure, sin, etc? What did you learn about forgiveness growing up? Having those conversations opened things up between me and my 2nd husband when we were dating and gave me some insights into his tolerance for “mistakes.” Then I was able to share some of the worst of my past. I’m not saying we’ve never struggled with some things, but they weren’t a surprise. Don’t mean to lecture, just to help. God bless you too💐

@serenity9756

Жыл бұрын

Hey, I understand that it might be hard to not lose hope if you've already had this many bad experiences. But keep in mind that the right person won't drop you for your past but see it as a way to understand you better. And I know, there's still a lot of people who don't understand but there also a lot who do and you'll find them. Also closing yourself off too much isn't the solution- but maybe only doing it to someone when you're a 100% sure you can trust them with that? and idk maybe find out before doing it what they think about mental health through a surface level convo? Idk man, I just really hope you have better luck with relationships in the future!! Don't lose hope, there's someone out there waiting for you :) Have a blessed day too and keep in mind that you deserved way better than this.

@troy566

Жыл бұрын

@@mymentorjane6705 thank you so much 🙏🙏

@troy566

Жыл бұрын

@@serenity9756 I appreciate the words of advice thank you 🙏

I personally don't think wanting to change certain aspects of your partner/making a list is bad as long as it's for the betterment of the relationship. Sometimes it's good to have an idea of what's going good or not in the relationship- even if you have to write it out- so you know what you're dealing with/can have clarity on the relationship. I kind of want my partner to make a list of me, if that helps them think better, so I can know what I'm doing well on and what I can improve on. Everyone, even your soul mate, will have aspects they do well in and need to improve.

@dillsnickle

Жыл бұрын

the difference is- "Changing" someone for selfish reasons, to make you feel secure at the cost of their wellbeing, vs someone wanting to do better because their partner inspires them to. You love someone, so you wanna be a good partner to them. So you talk about it and find ways to improve together, and also accepting your partner as they are, because some things cannot be changed, and the truth of it is? The ultimate goal couples should work towards is "Good enough". Leave some room for human flaws, and the bond will be even stronger

Very good points, it’s important that we spend time with people that are good for us and not settle for less💕

My first relationship was great. 7 month honeymoon phase where we just enjoyed each other's company. Then during the 8th month I knew things weren't right. We had a great relationship, but my gut was telling me she wasn't the one. I tried to logically find reasons why, but I couldn't. I followed my intuition and broke things off. Couldn't be happier that I did and I don't regret anything.

@TiffanyNguyen

Жыл бұрын

that sounds lack of effort, "7 months was great, 8th month feels off so I broke it off" ?

@jadenl9253

Жыл бұрын

@@TiffanyNguyen he just stated it was his intuition that stopped the relationship, maybe it is a lack of effort and I can’t speak on his behalf but unless you’ve been in a relationship where everything is fine but your gut is telling you different no matter how hard you try to commit you can’t label it as a lack of effort. It’s not that simple.

@momiji7789

Жыл бұрын

​@@TiffanyNguyen maybe they felt like it was too easy? Some people want to feel like they won. I was told this by some dude but he's insane. Other times you just don't have chemistry and there's no forcing it. But that one you definitely can tell from the beginning. But since it's first relationship, they probably didn't know any better yet.

@johnmcgehee5484

Жыл бұрын

You got out of the honeymoon phase and stopped trying. Relationships require work

@shreenjandutta

6 ай бұрын

​@@johnmcgehee5484very true

If some people don't like you, don't sweat it! There are a lot of people out there, and one of them will be destined to be your soulmate! It may break your heart that someone doesn't like you in a relationship, and you may keep hanging on because you think you don't have a choice, But don't. Do what's right for you. I assure you it will pay off in the long run. Stay strong, healthy, and safe out there, y'all! 💖❤✌

To help distinguishing intolerant loved ones from validly concerned ones: Pay attention to the kind of critique they have. "They're just not good enough for you", "You're out of their league", "We don't want that in our family" etc are criticisms that tip you off that the issue is more you having a relationship at all or a relationship with a certain group of people that your loved ones look down on. That kind of thing tends to be less valid. "I can't put my finger on it, but something's off", "I'm worried about you", "X behavior really rubs me the wrong way", "I think it's unfair how they treated you" are more often valid concerns. Your loved ones either admit there that they can't see a clear red flag but something gives them alarm bells, or they can point to specific traits and behaviors that are the issue (rather than aspects of the person's identity).

I ignored the red flags at the beginning bc of the honeymoon phase I can say ex's were brought up it wouldn't be me it would be them my gut feeling was super strong and I invisioned everything happening then it happened I started having bad dreams about being pushed away and it all went downhill from there but hey this time I'm gonna watch for red flags if I do really want to get into another I'm just afraid too sometimes bc. It took me a while to let my guard down and allow myself to love again. But yeah that's all 🙏🥺 hope everyone has healing and successful relationships out there.

What if you know they might not be the one but you really can't stop loving them and the thought of not being with them is equivalent to death for you?

@MarielaMerino

Жыл бұрын

this.

@mysterymachine94

Жыл бұрын

It's like they were saying in the comments earlier, anyone can be the one, it's just a matter of how much you both want eachother to be the one ❤️

@haru_catty

Жыл бұрын

@@mysterymachine94 that's the best way to put it tbh!!

@geeeeya

Жыл бұрын

This is called attachment and addiction, not necessarily love.

@meekelizabeth6850

Жыл бұрын

@@geeeeya :(

Even the most perfect circle will not fit into the most perfect square. If you don’t fit together, that doesn’t mean either of you necessarily need to change anything. It might just be that you’re not meant for each other, and that’s okay 💜

They say hindsight is 20/20. I was married for 16 years. I loved him but wasn't in love with him. Turns out he was a narcissist, and most of the things mentioned in the video are spot on. I'm a "rescuer". I thought I could help him & "fix" things... I was completely wrong. The criticism came, then when he saw that it upset me, he'd always say I take stuff too seriously, or he was just joking. But he meant what he said. I liked to talk to him after I hadn't seen him all day but he'd say, "don't you ever shut up?" And "conversation with you is stupid" I can be an outgoing person but he would criticize me in public when I was friendly to strangers. He would walk ahead of me instead of beside me... Too many things to write here. I've been divorced since last year. His alcohol drove a big wedge into things, too.

@m2pozad

Жыл бұрын

Was the dating phase too short to know who you were bonding with? Or was there an agenda that overshadowed his real self to you? Kids?

@moonbinnie98

Жыл бұрын

This sounds a lot like the fwb relationship Im in..... Can i ask what other kinds of things he did?

@GayleCreates

Жыл бұрын

Sorry to hear this. You're not alone.

This is so beautiful and makes me realise that whatever has happened was the best to have happened. No regrets only moving forward from here.

I love these videos, they really keep me in check and help with self awareness of my own toxic shit that I do.

If there is someone meant for You, on Your way through life. You will find each other.

@user-jv3sq4vc3r

Жыл бұрын

Is there really?

I’ve been wondering for a while if me and my partner will last (everyone says we will) and I’ve always felt this was right as time went on my feelings of love and security grew. We learned how to trust and count on each other. and watching this video really opened my eyes that luckily we don’t have any of those issues, sure no relationship is perfect but I’m so happy to be in a healthy loving relationship. And for people struggling just know to give yourself grace and love yourself if u haven’t found your partner yet (because you can’t love someone else until you truly love yourself)❤️

Going through a breakup right now, I thought I had found my best friend. I've always been a closed book even towards close friends and family but was beginning to open up. But maybe self-sufficiency is all I really need, I don't ever want to feel like a burden again.

@4mar1elle

Жыл бұрын

I feel you. I had the same thought and did everything to become independent until I was. Be who you want to be and maybe you will find somebody you can connect to. Sometimes it is about experience you have to make and sometimes it is about coincidence. Let things come to you, be a little sceptical about everything and look out for the flags that show you whether it's the right person. I think that I had to go through all of this to be where I am now. Maybe you feel the same and maybe not. You have to choose your path yourself. I wish you good luck.

1. They want you to change 0:57 2. You cant count on them 1:30 3. You have different values 2:00 4. They can hear, but not listen 2:51 5. Your intuition 3:36 6. They are fond of “you” statements 4:10 7. Your close ones can tell 5:05 hope that helped!! ❤️

@khalilahd.

Жыл бұрын

Thank you!

@wordzmyth

Жыл бұрын

Thank you

Really great advice for 10/10 You not only highlighted the foundations of a relationship like values and them bringing out the best in you and not changing you. You introduced the red flags and family/friends opinions and ideas of them that tell you their not the one

Add to this: they have no interest in wishing you well on your birthday, they ignore it.

Literally all of these. I’ve already left the person but I’m struggling to mentally let go and this helped reassure that I’ve made the right decision for myself.

This is so true. I had a dream about me and my ex, ending it. A week before it happened.

@HannahMarieee

Жыл бұрын

Wow! Intuition is keyyy. I hope your doing fine!

@pandascoops

Жыл бұрын

What happened in that dream? Idk dreams are still kinda different from intuition for me. You have to take it with a grain of salt. Sometimes it tells you something, sometimes it really is just a dream. I had a dream that I was gonna break up with my boyfriend before and it hurt me I was crying and crying and I woke up and realized I don’t think I can do that lol. I don’t think I can or want to leave him. Obviously, I still evaluated our relationship after that dream and didn’t decide anything right away haha. But I also didn’t 100% label that as an intuition. Maybe there was just something I needed to check with the both of us. Fast forward to a year or two later, now we’re married 😅

relationships take understanding, communication and work. Theres no magic fairyland story about the perfect person you marry who has no annoying habits

Your voice is always so calming and comfortable that when you actually started yelling at 4:13 I think that just crushed my soul. I wasn't ready.

"You can't count on them" "They can hear, but not listen" "Your intuition" Thank you for the validation. Health, happiness and good vibes to all who sees this. We will all be okay. 🌻

This goes both ways. It’s most important of all to understand when you’re the one being toxic or, “not the one”.

I've trapped myself in one of these relationships, my partner is the spitting reflection of how these videos have depicted. She accurately hits every single example of a narcissist and I hit 4 out of 6 types of being empathic. I was not aware of any of this information a few months ago and have been self reflecting with these videos frequently. I feel I stay with my partner to protect her from herself, it has been very difficult for me. Her behaviour has changed me emotionally, made me experience anxiety for the first time in my life and has lately been making me feel that no matter how hard I try to make her life happier she refuses to have fun with me or enjoy my company, always turns my concerns back on me as if I an the problem and refuses to acknowledge any accountability for her actions. Always gaslighting me that the way she is acting is not what she actually did and that I am remembering it incorrectly or taking her the wrong way. I don't know what to do, your videos help me maintain my sanity. Thank you.

Thankyou for this. I can relate to every single one of these, and couldn't understand why my gut was telling me something was up when I felt so in love with my girlfriend. I wish I'd seen this a month ago before she broke up with me. Its lovely to find a video that is so comforting and relatable, to give my mind peace and clarity.

This is one of the best psychology channel on KZread. Extremely engaging videos, amazing content and extremely soothing narrator voice.

I love your videos! The advice and insight is so helpful and therapeutic. If you don't mind, I'd like to mention that I find the audio somewhat distracting and quite bassy. This is a small nitpick. In spite of this minor criticism about the quality of the audio overall, I found listening to the presenter to be quite soothing and calming. I am looking forward to all your future content. Thank you!! I feel better already

@Psych2go

Жыл бұрын

Thanks for sharing!! Glad this video helped and thank you for the feedback about the VO. We will get the team know about this

my ex girlfriend wasnt the one and I’ve finally accepted it :)

I love your videos. The narrator's voice is so calming and soothing, and I love the little characters on the screen. They're so cute! Plus there's a lot of good stuff in each one.

This will help me when I grow up in 7 years and get married in 10, because I'm really decisive about their traits and you have taught me that you can't change the people who you love.

i think relationship is all about hardwork and awareness. even if you dealt with such issues as above, you need to first be aware of the issues and communicate it with your partner. But make sure both are in the state of being aware. instead of just following your gut and leave the relationship, why dont deal and handle it with your partner and grow together and compromised. afterall, gut feelings sometimes can come from unhealed trauma or subconsious sabotaging behaviour. its important to work on you instead of expecting someone to be your ideals and more importantly appreciate your partner's pace not compare.

It’s hard because “the one” also can ruffle your feathers and make you want to change. So as much as they might compliment you, I think it’s okay for them to be polar different from you and it could be hard as long as they have your best interest in mind and you have the same goal.

I recently went through a breakup and it is difficult understanding that it is over, that my friend is no longer there. Now, this video has reminded me of things, and showed me that it would not be a good relationship in the long run. Even just in the beginning, I'd cry because I couldn't change fast enough. They wanted more than I could give, and weren't satisfied with what I gave. This video helped me tremendously, and this account is helping me develop as a person. Thank you

i love you because ur voice is so soft and i can watch your vids at night time with the volume up x

Sorry for the people who watched this video and realized that their significant other was not the one. I was originally afraid of this video as I’m a paranoid and very superstitious person at times but this video actually helped me see even further that my significant other is the one. Not only have these signs not appeared but I was actually surprised to learn that other people live with these things happening to them in their daily lives and for anyone that, that is happening to. Please get out of that situation and find someone new who will care for you and love you unconditionally!

"You're close ones can tell" pointer is really hit or miss. Tons of relationships going down the drain these days because groupies always tell each other to "be fierce and independent, to party" and "ditch her" at every little problem. Our times are full of some sinful thinking yo

Man I just can listen to your voice everyday, it’s to calming and digs in deep to my heart ilysm ♥️♥️

these are really good signs that someone just isnt the one for you. I was just out of a toxic relationship and the person just showed red flags constantly. the longer youre in a toxic relationship w someone, the longer it takes to get over them

i clicked on this video fearing that i would come across something that would make me doubt her but now i love her even more

He was the one but he did not choose me in the end. After seven years of being together.

This has become abundantly clear now

I needed to hear #5 today badly, thank you

I think sometimes, if two people are still growing up, maybe they should grow first. The destinations can't be the same if there's not a destination to begin wih

I don’t mean this to be ridiculous or obvious but I think it’s important to say that I learned the most important sign that s/he is not the one is that s/he is married. That took me a few years to figure out one time in my life and ignoring it caused a lot of suffering all around.

What I needed for confirmation that I’m moving in the right direction.

Gut feeling says no but needed this video to reaffirm! Thank you.

I like the little prince reference 🌹

The thing is, everything with us was going so great. And every time I see these videos I can see that we just worked so well. The one and only issue is that she just keeps pressuring me to do the hard choices first without her understanding how it’s so hard. And it honestly makes me so sad how she can’t see or she’s just too scared to do it herself but wanting it so badly she’s pushing me down

If you're in a relationship where you notice toxic traits within your partner, that's definitely all the more cause of concern and it's time to either bring that to their attention and offer them the help they need or if that doesn't work, then it's not a good or healthy relationship and it's time to end it. You deserve better and know your self worth.

i try to change my husband for the better. But when he TELLS me to change it is different! Especially when if you’re pointing out one’s flaws, then you should be able to point out or accept yours..

Thank u for ur videos, hope u have a great day/night ❤

Oh yes. Even 10 years down the road, it can happen. To have no quarrel or grudge then is a blessing to know how you want to part ways. And for those sad moments, Japanese city pop has a few pearls you can listen to. 🙂

I new in my gut my ex wasn’t the one. And it didn’t take long. We only lasted two months. My mental health was plummeting, our friends told me that we didn’t seem like a couple, he was emotionally unavailable because he assumed he already knew everything about me because we were friends first, and he was rushing through the relationship stages like he would get an XBox achievement from it even though I told him this was my first relationship and I needed to take it slow. He told me he loved me and that set me off because I felt he didn’t even try to know me on a deep emotional level. It wasn’t long after that that I found a good time to break up with him.

@LaChanceuse

Жыл бұрын

Good for you for listening to your gut eventually. Wishing you healing and time to process before entering a new relationship.

@suicidalalien6298

Жыл бұрын

Wow... really? That's what set you off? I was being abused physically, mentally, verbally, and sexually... yet I still stayed with my bastard of an ex for 2 years. Why? Because is not like anyone else wanted me, and guess what? I was right. I'm 26, alone, with nobody and ready to pull the trigger and you over here teuggered cause he told you "I love you" way too early? No one EVER told me "I love you" in my entire damn life... EVER!

@sassyghost_8

Жыл бұрын

@@suicidalalien6298 I’m so sorry that that happened to you. I truly am. You don’t deserve to be treated like that and I sincerely hope that you find someone wonderful who treats you the way you want to be treated. To be clear, I wasn’t “triggered” by him telling me he loved me. It was just the moment I realized something wasn’t right for me. I wasn’t trying to diminish anyone for their experiences, just giving an example of when I trusted my gut. I’m sorry that I’ve upset you and that this comment brought up some bad memories. That was never my intention. You are worthy of happiness whether that’s with someone or if you can find happiness within yourself. Again, I sincerely hope you find the right person and your happiness. After being hurt the way you were, you deserve to feel safe and happy. ❤️

@Rebecca.xoxoxo

Жыл бұрын

@@suicidalalien6298 ummmmm…. Sorry you were abused in many different ways, but don’t be rude asf!! Maybe you should have gathered the courage to leave like sassy goat did. Saying i love you too soon can be a form of manipulation called gaslighting. Which could lead to further abuse down the line. Don’t invalidate her feelings or spirit of discernment 🙄

@suicidalalien6298

Жыл бұрын

@@Rebecca.xoxoxo how bout YOU don't be rude af then...? What a way to invalidate me just to white-knight someone else hun... real cute 🙄 You ain't sorry... you don't even give a shit.

5:05 I think it's also important to realize that *both* statements can be correct here; your family and friends can be overly nosy and critical towards a situation, and it can also be connected to genuine signs of a poor relationship. I dealt with a situation like this firsthand in the past, when I was around 19yrs old. My mom strongly disapproved of a girl I liked, but she expressed this disapproval based on very trivial things, and she hadn't even met the girl. Because of this, it formed a barrier. I didn't listen to further criticisms because my mom, as well as other family members, had expressed criticisms without even giving the girl a chance. It turned out to be a horrible relationship but it lasted a very long time because I shut out all criticisms after being berated with unfounded claims for weeks on end. Just thought I'd share this story in case any of you know someone whose relationship concerns you. Be careful how you criticize, and how valid each of your claims are. You could try protecting someone you love and only end up pushing them away, and making them less willing to listen to more serious criticisms further down the line.

Thanks for covering this topic.

The right person attracts when you become complete and know they are the one based on real information like this keep going

I never had much for emotions for my first 4 decades. Finding my wife was essentially not driven by feelings at all, purely reason. Someone I could trust, complimented me, and I could stand to be around. I eventually grew to love her after 2 decades. I am still learning about emotions, but now I kind of have them. What I like most about her is that she makes me a better person.

all of us can be the one I think, it's psychological. we only think we're not because of many excuses but we can survive if all misconceptions thru communication and acceptance 😊😊😊 and also consistently that your mindset will always be together no matter what