getting people without adhd to understand “i have problems doing things, basic things that i know i have to do like showering, sleeping, and brushing my teeth, even things i want to do and love doing” is difficult. it’s extremely extremely extremely easy to fall into negative thoughts patterns about yourself when all you’ve ever heard is how much potential you have that’s going to be wasted because of how lazy you are

@chloe-tb3so

2 жыл бұрын

i feel the same way and i never knew how to explain it until i read this

@panasado7886

2 жыл бұрын

That hit me. I have tons of ideas that I want to accomplish, but I just can't. Even tho I'm motivated, it's so difficult to start when you have your head all over the place and just can't focus.

@danceforlife4952

2 жыл бұрын

This makes me want to cry because it’s sooo true!!!!

@Motherhood2Menopause

2 жыл бұрын

I can 1000% relate to every single word you said. I get it:(:( I think I have been my whole life .. but signs just have gotten worse and worse since my mom passed away in 2019. And also there is ADD in my family too. My siblings kids both have it(they’re adults now) still go to therapy and on meds

@aaronwherry62

2 жыл бұрын

It's best to understand yourself, and leave the justification alone, who cares what they think if it's not good for your mind

I'm not made for this society i wanna run around in nature and catch squirrels.

@jessicacole8404

4 жыл бұрын

.You may get your wish soon. Lol*

@Enjoytheshow435

4 жыл бұрын

Andi R Me too but i’m locked down. Damn!! I want to chase anything! Anything that can give me a spike of dopamine yet I take my pill then I crash.

@skeetjenkins5852

3 жыл бұрын

My brain is struggling of being off benzodiazepines during this quarantine anf I don't have much of a support system.I'm having protractive withdrawals for months and I feel like I can't do this anymore sometimes..does anyone have any suggestions?

@TheStuntViking

3 жыл бұрын

Me too. I chase the ball in Rocket League as a not even comparable substitution, but it calms me at least.

@rwitt3vloggs

3 жыл бұрын

Felt that

Dude I’m literally in tears. I’m 26 years old and have never been diagnosed with ADHD but I’ve always had a very hard time completing tasks and doing things I don’t want to do. I am convinced that I do have ADHD and knowing I’m not just a worthless and useless person who can’t accomplish anything is so comforting and hopefully I can get some help to manage my issues and finally make some progress in life.

@beluugawhale

Жыл бұрын

Have you sought a diagnosis? How are things now? ^^

@warrick7689

Жыл бұрын

I'm 32 and was recently diagnosed and got medication, what a difference it made in my entire life. Don't hesitate and go and get treatment.

@markiscarter3053

Жыл бұрын

God has many things to accomplish through you keep believing

@Dwigt_Rortugal

10 ай бұрын

You are loved, you have purpose, and your being here and having the characteristics you have are not an accident. I wish I'd known what you now know at 26, and I wish I'd had someone to offer accurate perspective to me when i was younger. It would have saved me a lot of grief, fear, and terrible sadness. "Why is life so difficult?" was the nagging feeling I'd always had since I was a boy. Now that I know what I know, I realize that my brain being wired differently is not always a handicap. In many ways, it has made us specifically gifted in seeing problems and challenging situations from a different perspective. It has helped me excel at certain tasks at work, and if harnessed and managed correctly, it can help us notice things that others don't because we are naturally wired to see lots of things simultaneously. It can also help us be more compassionate and willing to help others who struggle. It sure is lonely a lot of the time, though. Most of society has no idea what ADHD really is because for generations, it was denied as an excuse or a crutch for hypochondriacs. Basically, "You're lazy, you suck at things, and you blame it on ADHD. Everyone knows that's a total crock." I still have extended family who out of ignorance openly mock neurological differences, not realizing that people with those differences are all around them and have to work hard to mask their differences and function with them. You're going to do great, friend, and I say that from the perspective of being on the other side of the doubts and hopelessness you are likely feeling. I'm still struggling with the lies of inadequacy reinforced especially from my youth, but when I have those doubts, I look at what I've accomplished and the results don't lie. For me, personally, knowing who God says I am and having that identity to counter the years of lies has largely set me free from the feelings of worthlessness, fear, and inadequacy. I'm fully aware that expressing my faith even lightly will likely bring on some trolling, but I am who I am and I'm not afraid anymore to express that. The results don't lie, and for me, there's no denying what I've experienced firsthand, because no one else is in my shoes anymore than I'm in someone else's. There is hope, and you have a lifetime of meaningful experiences ahead of you.

@elise9537

8 ай бұрын

yes everything feels like a burden if you have no interest in it. how are you doing now?

Dam this is eye-opening. I have ADHD and I struggle with this annoying loop where I apply for a job and think "yeah I can do this, my experience matches up" - then they call me and I think "actually, what if I mess up something or I'll struggle with basic things?" Then I talk myself out of it and don't return the call

@moe4315

Жыл бұрын

I am in this exact situation as well :(

@ChooseLoveToday316

Жыл бұрын

Christ I relate with this.

@amaebarnes

Жыл бұрын

I do this about EVERYTHING

@poak5742

Жыл бұрын

Hear you there mate i am go through exactly the same cycle but never normally get to the interview stage and sometimes not even off the web page with the job they need people for. I have seen a job that i could do with my eyes shut and it was good pay but it was 5.30 am start time which i tried to kid myself for about 3 minutes i can do that and yes sometimes i can but sometimes im lucky to get 8 hours sleep over 3 to 4 days let alone every night plus i work myself up worrying i will be late for things the next day which makes it almost impossible to sleep. Good ol adhd brain tried medication and it made me a emotionless zombie well almost emotionless if u dont count agressive and very snappy that is.

@ahhwe-any7434

Жыл бұрын

My husband has adhd & his mom thinks church will fix it. I mean, he's almost in his 30s by now. All the problems yall had b4, maybe just maybe it isn't working! I'm not even sure if this is inherited but both of his parents r disruptive, don't listen, & think they have all the answers. But the type of answers where the next really will know or has actually experienced will be left thinking do u really just talk just to be talking? Bc its ok to keep ur mouth shut when u don't. No really, it is. But they'll stay pulling out random ish from the air. Bc ppl can def tell when u do or don't make up things... & my husband does little to big f ups. Like not putting machinery on break while working & etc. Like no adhd isn't at all. absolutely not a real thing & doesn't effect ppl in their work, personal, & daily lives.

I've entered in a stage where positive feedback don't affect me but negative feedback destroys me

@theodorebitsy

3 жыл бұрын

Same dude 😫

@kiranm845

3 жыл бұрын

Yess

@MorganBondelid

2 жыл бұрын

Check out the concept of Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria. You’re not alone.

@niinestormtv2331

2 жыл бұрын

Aye I feel that, but kinda the opposite. I seek negative feedback and freak out when positive feedback comes my way

@Squeekysquid

2 жыл бұрын

@@niinestormtv2331 Does a compliment feel less genuine than a criticism? Like half the time when I get told I did a good I immediately think oh they're just saying that, or they're patronizing me, or they don't actually mean it. Whereas when I hear a criticism, I'm just like yeah add it to the collection.

I'm an adult with ADHD, and I've been struggling with that EXACT cycle for years. I've been told countless times that "it's all a choice" or "you just need to want it bad enough." Then, when I have problems like being late or impulsive, I feel bad because I seem to be just too lazy or unwilling to make better choices! I'm going to show my parents this video, and maybe they'll have a more open mind about it.

@gatestimonymiracle1302

Жыл бұрын

What people don't understand ....is just because other people can cope with the symptoms of ADHD doesn't mean everyone can cope with it the same way.

@JenyaIsJustChilling

Жыл бұрын

They probably won't. My father never understood me, and he doesn't want to, even after so many years i have actual status of mentally disabled. I don't want to judge someone i don't know, but there's a possibility that they don't care and don't want to learn any new information about your (or whoever reads this) condition, because it doesn't fit in their world view and narrative.

@ArThur_hara

Жыл бұрын

I just got into college it's has been 3 years now since I started struggling with that cycle. I still don't know if I have ADHD and people around me reactions make me think I'm just acting as an excuse to my laziness,etc. Although the I do research the more I'm convinced I might have ADHD. It's really a painful thing for some reason the effects (if I really have ADHD) only started to be visible 3 year ago what about those 13 first years that would mean I don't have ADHD and really became lazy as my parents say, I scared to discover I don't have it after doing the test that would mean those 3 years in hell where all because of me.

@ArThur_hara

Жыл бұрын

Did it work?

@365ral

Жыл бұрын

@@ArThur_hara It didn't change much. I've been on Vyvanse for an eating disorder, but it's also done wonders for my concentration since it's a stimulant!

I’ll never forget my friends telling me they didn’t trust me because of how unreliable I was. While I was lucky enough to be academically capable of graduating high school easily, the impact my “best friends” had on me never has or will leave me. According to them, I’m unreliable, lazy, and don’t care… I just wish they realized how much I cared without me having to prove it in a neurological way… because I care more than anyone

@ArThur_hara

Жыл бұрын

Words man/girl...

@ChooseLoveToday316

Жыл бұрын

I completely relate.

@halimaomar9820

Жыл бұрын

Totally. You care more than anyone. Because we are very sensitive people but it just doesn’t translate in the ways they want to see.

@iiCounted-op5jx

Жыл бұрын

@@halimaomar9820 fr

@DelphineTheWorstBladeEver

Жыл бұрын

I mean, there is no real way to know that you care more than anyone. But if you do feel this way, the effort matters to them. I know it's not a simple fix of waving a wand, but you have to focus on you and care about you first. You need to find the things that help you, if you want to show others that you are there for them. It's only going to harder to show them, if you aren't caring for yourself just as much.

One of the biggest frustrations for me as someone who has ADD is that I know I have the ability/capacity to do things, but the difficulties imposed by ADD block my ability to fully reach my potential. Potential and ability are there, but I can't fully access it. It's maddening.

@nameless592

Жыл бұрын

Exactly. It’s not that you think less of yourself rather that you are aware that something is off and that’s the think that’s in the way not that I am in the way of me. The more comments I read the more I see that mental health discussion need to be re positioned.

@bw5187

4 ай бұрын

I know the feeling, like a pasture you can't open the gate to but it is right there.

Literally me. People have called me dumb plenty of times and I developed a horrible self esteem because of my adhd. Thank God I had a support system that encouraged me to get diagnosed.

@chickenlittle4014

2 жыл бұрын

Same here self esteem in and out :(

@paulbeaney4901

Жыл бұрын

I have learned to mask and just act dumb. Its easier than trying to explain why something is wrong, while contending with chaotic thoughts. Trying to get my explanation out is so difficult i just dont bother. It has caused me to be VERY dismissive of things i don't agree with or don't see value in.

@ArThur_hara

Жыл бұрын

Hi me from another universe. I do the same and it's painful everyone at college think I'm dump although I have better results than some of them. I agree with the explanation thing you said to last time I tried to explain myself the guy who's my best friend (and I'm his) in the college said "The issues is you think you are the only one who has problems in life" and them the girl I'm into added "unfortunately you're right", since then I never tried explaining what I'm going through and Everytime something would need me to explain why I'm like this I would think I'm just a dumb guy who trying to justify why he is an idiot or some who is look for attention trying to act like he is the MC in this world. it's painful to have an issues and you can't even explain it to ppl who care about you so they could help you.

@jericoblaynechildofgod6655

Жыл бұрын

It takes strength in being able to not get frustrated and be able to do things by habit to reman focus other people don't or understand about what is going on with us.

@blueshoes915

Жыл бұрын

@@ArThur_hara Sounds like you told people close to you who you thought were safe people but they weren’t. If you had a friend who was a safe person to tell this all to, you would have had a different response. Some people do not understand nuance. 💕

I've been told early in life that I have a learning disability. Yes, I get depressed. But, now, I run someone's business, can do auto repair, electrical repair, basic plumbing repair, I live on my own. Seeing a therapist was the best thing I've ever done!

@steelcityrailroad5095

Жыл бұрын

Sounds like me, I sucked in school but ruled in shop class and am very mechanical. Everyone tells me I do very good work and a perfectionist, but back in my mind, I feel like I'm inadequate and not good enough.

@JaneThatcher89

3 ай бұрын

May I ask what type of therapy helped you so greatly?

Here just after I made someone I respect a lot angry again and procrastinated on studying for an exam until last three hours (every test I have I studied for the night before), not able to focus on what I have to do, but becoming almost a self called doctor of psychology, sleep deprived sleeping 4 hours a day for almost two years because I can’t get myself into bed, and hateful towards myself because I keep on running away from my responsibilities until the last second, and because I am so sensitive, socially awkward, never aware of what is happening outside of me, always falling behind, disappointing people, disappointing myself. Honestly, life with ADHD is a horror. I don’t know what to do, I’m trying to change every single day, but no matter how hard I try to keep up with everything, something always falls between my fingers. I’m sorry that we are going through ADHD. It’s truly traumatic to have it, to say the least. Know, that no matter how hard it gets, being you is still worth it. I’m here with you.❤

@johnmonroe1997

Жыл бұрын

what you said is what I see in my life sometimes, hope things go better for you

@meganmcgrory6274

Жыл бұрын

You make so much sense. None of this is easy and your strength is inspiring

@nicok2131

Жыл бұрын

you said it. I want to share that learning the different aspects of ADHD, especially the ones that make me feel out of control of myself and start the shame cycle going, has been so helpful to me. Naming 'symptoms' like Demand Avoidance" or "rejection sensitivity" and learning about them makes things easier and allows me to come at my symptoms with SO much more compassion, self care and patience. I love what you said. Being you is still worth it, and especially so with all the riches a neurodiverse brain gifts us with: problem solving, art, thinking outside the norm, entrepreneurship. and most of all empathy.

@Natalia-pc7fm

Жыл бұрын

I’ve felt this way many times. It seems all we can do is to get the ones closest to us to understand, get appropriate medical treatment, make adjustments to our surroundings and duties and learn to not be so hard on ourselves. I wish you much strength in this new year and all the years to come.

@sheagaier7582

Жыл бұрын

I totally get you. When I did my masters degree in behavioral health I had a lot of trouble starting and finishing complex writing assignments. I could do my discussion board assignments just fine but when it came to visual assignments I had difficulty even starting them because I cannot learn visually at all. I kept thinking “I’m not a visual learner so what’s the point of these stupid diagram assignments?” A neurotypical person would feel happy after successfully completing a difficult assignment, but with adhd, the dopamine reward isn’t there. Instead the dopamine is replaced with rage, frustration, and fatigue. A common thought I had after completing these assignments was “I never want to do this effing thing again!”

My mind is blown. I recently got an ADHD diagnosis (at the age of 46) and I just thought I was stuck for life with my inability to be successful at some of the most important parts of my life. And now to realize that that is a lie?? That I'm not a bad person and I really can be successful?? I think I'm going to cry!

This is me 100%. I’m at a point where I’m afraid I’ll never change.

@fairlyliterary4771

4 жыл бұрын

Same but if we want to change we shall

@lovelybydecay7811

4 жыл бұрын

yup...

@felisha209

4 жыл бұрын

Would like to start a group chat for adults dealing with these issues? Are you interested

@fairlyliterary4771

4 жыл бұрын

@@felisha209 what kinda group chat?

@theseeker1237

4 жыл бұрын

Seek every avenue for help. I didn't, I'm 64, and my life has been a nightmare of every form of mental illness. I'm ready for the next life that may or may not come after death. Please seek help, you will get better.

I was nearly in tears watching this because she hit every nail on the head. I've always felt inadequate and like a failure for not measuring up to others. Even now, as an adult and being aware that it's a disorder causing my issues, I can't seem to get a grip on it. Even my parents, who are aware of my ADHD, don't really understand how hard it is. They just tell me I need to try harder and it's exhausting trying to fit their expectations. They don't mean to make me feel worse, they just don't understand it.

@douglasduda9826

Жыл бұрын

Yea, I have had diagnosed adhd for a long time and even did research a few years ago to learn more. It got to the point thought where, the more I learned the worse I felt, so I stopped. Even though my Dad has ADHD he is the Fight type and I am flight. So that is something, also everyone is so unique that its very different from person to person. This makes it really hard for anyone to understand.

@Armistotle

Жыл бұрын

Seriously same here, it's a different kind of intensity to hear someone say it back to you, even in a video. I'm only just now coming to terms with how my childhood really set up my beliefs and self esteem for my whole adult life. You're not alone though, and you inherently have value for being here.

@melodieneil712

Жыл бұрын

I’m w you. Just watched this and want to cry. I’m 66 and have lived w this undiagnosed until this year. I don’t give up easily and will continue to learn about ways to help myself. Please hang in, you’re worth it!

Recently diagnosed.. 36 years old. After years of feeling that I waste of air because I couldn’t bring myself to finish anything, or just find motivation to focus.. then having these thoughts reinforced by the people around me..this video literally explained so much of what I have been trying to understand

@sarahplaisted5226

Жыл бұрын

Diagnosed at 34 in October. The amount of times I’ve felt worthless broken and different. Not to mention years of drug addiction. Thank god I got sober. I was attempting to self medicate and I just thought it was depression. I’m getting better each week. It’s not easy it’s a lot to take in. I hope you see now how it was never you .

@user-wu7oj2oj4b

11 ай бұрын

🧡

@ashley4657

8 ай бұрын

I'm in the process of seeking therapy. During my initial evaluation, it is the belief that I do have ADHD. I'm 36, as well. This video almost brought me to tears within the first minute. There's so much to learn about myself, and while terrifying, I am at the point where I want to better understand why I am the way I am. What do I want in life? How do I get there?

So I have discovered I have ADHD at age 65 and I want to say I am most impressed by my ELABORATE ways of explaining myself to myself. And how others have characterized this...including therapists...has also been elaborate...and wrong. Knowing I have ADHD is SUCH A RELIEF. I feel much better about myself now. I've been doing my best! And no one knew what it was when I was a kid struggling.

@Annii_Oakley_

4 ай бұрын

Congratulations! Welcome to our unenviable club… I’m super excited you have a chance at relief… best to you love 🤍

@JaneThatcher89

3 ай бұрын

How would you explain yourself to yourself? Hehe 😂

I've seen many videos about adhd ect...I have NEVER watched one that explains ME so well! Its just how I've evolved and its nice to know things can change. Fantastic informative video. Thank you.

@DrTraceyMarks

4 жыл бұрын

You’re welcome Gemma. I’m so glad you can get some hope from this video. 😊

@richardmiseljr2413

4 жыл бұрын

@Late to the Game when I was in 1st 2nd and 3rd grade in the late 1960's the teachers insulted and humiliated me in front of the other kids.

@richardmiseljr2413

4 жыл бұрын

@Late to the Game I agree there are some teachers these days that do that.

@katharine8554

3 жыл бұрын

@@richardmiseljr2413 that happened to me in 5th grade when I was the only one who failed the practice benchmark for math.

@richardmiseljr2413

3 жыл бұрын

@@katharine8554 It's a horrible degrading confidence killing feeling.

I have ADHD and Im creative in poetry, drawing, crafting, painting.

@DrTraceyMarks

4 жыл бұрын

That’s awesome. There’s a lot of creativity in people with ADHD.

Im 32. I haven't been medically diagnosed, but your videos really make me feel that I have gone undiagnosed for my entire life.

Wow. I am a student in highschool with extremely low esteem and I have never seen someone describe my emotional behavior so accurately. I criticize myself so much to the point where I can’t even SEE the many things i’ve accomplished. Wishing people to understand everyday, every mishap I make and restraining myself incredibly to fit in.

The ADHD curse: it takes me FOREVER to understand and don't get how others can grasp audio/educational aspects in life so easily. The ADHD blessing: I out shine EVERY ONE in creativity and don't get how others can't put things (anything) together as easily as me. Smile.

@DrTraceyMarks

4 жыл бұрын

Yes a lot of people with ADHD are very creative. If you can find a way to exploit that, you’ve got it made

@calum9250

3 жыл бұрын

It took me 6/7 months of being told the same stuff, over and over, in different ways, in my latest job as a salesman for it to finally click. Took me nearly 4 years of my parents badgering me to start a savings account so I can move out to actually do it, and even when I'd opened it I was still draining money from it on a monthly basis just so I wouldn't miss out on the stuff my mates were doing (and could also afford). I didn't understand why I was saving my money and the urgency of it, fast forward and I understand but still struggle to not spend my money, or I just forget I had something in the fridge which has to be thrown out and the cycle repeats .

Watching this had brought me to tears. I only got diagnosed over a year ago at 26 but I sometimes think the damage that living life in a strict and academic setting with undiagnosed ADHD caused is sometimes too much to fix

@Dancestar1981

2 жыл бұрын

I was diagnosed this year at 40

@ilyasskb821

2 жыл бұрын

Same as you ,and i am struggling with my final college exam that i have already failed 2 times because i just can't study enough , nor sleep well. Sometimes i wish for an apocalyptical event that would just make life more stimulating.

@Briemerald

2 жыл бұрын

You got this👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾✊🏾✊🏾✊🏾

@dekoener485

2 жыл бұрын

I was diagnosed at 40 and I’m 50 now.

@polarbearrevolution

2 жыл бұрын

My condolences. I was diagnosed at 7 years old. It didn't help me one bit.

This is 100% me, 46 years old, and going round in circles and my self esteem is on the floor. Now medicated but really can’t seem to improve my self esteem, and it impacts every aspect of my life to the point that I’m getting paranoid that everyone sees me as not normal. My husband has reminded me several times, he wishes we could just have a “normal” conversation. It’s soul destroying and it’s beating me down to the point I’m not sure I can get back to being “me”, it’s time to find a therapist who can help me find some appreciation for myself, and help find “me”.

@TheThora17

8 ай бұрын

I hope things work out in your favour💕

@britjj5126

8 ай бұрын

At least you got married. I've lost hope I'll ever be able to be in a relationship. It's so hard to even get past the talking stage. Haven't had any success in the love department 😢

WHO GAVE YOU PERMISSION to read my my mind like that?! 😅 this was so helpful thank you!

This was very insightful. I was diagnosed with ADHD as a kid, and you just described my core beliefs. They have started to change a little as I started out on my career, but emotional support is extremely important to combat those beliefs. The thing to keep in mind with ADHD (and low self-esteem in general) is it makes you emotionally vulnerable to toxic people, especially narcissists, who will take your insecurities and beat you over the head with them to manipulate you. Not only does it give the toxic person what they want, it feeds those beliefs and even turns then into something more difficult to work with. You need to protect yourself from this and get away from that situation if you are in it.

@DrTraceyMarks

4 жыл бұрын

You’re absolutely right Puffie. You have enough things working against you when it comes to your environment making you feel bad about yourself. You don’t need to be torn down any further from a relationship.

@destinationunderground6006

3 жыл бұрын

Holy fuck! Wow. This part of my life just got validated big time.

@firepatriot42

3 жыл бұрын

And this just confirms my plans to quite my current job. Toxic and have 2 narcissists working their. It's a nightmare. By weeks end I sometimes call off I'm so emotionally numb.

@surayaarends478

3 жыл бұрын

Wow i found myself in that situation. I thank God that i built up enough courage to leave the relationship. When i look back i am amazed.

@SharlenesJourney

2 жыл бұрын

You just explained my life 🙏🏾😔

"You are not the negative consequences," is a great thought. It's hard for me to really believe, but it is a good thought!

@JJan953

2 жыл бұрын

Its true! Not in the way that you will not be affected by your adhd, but for me getting out of puberty helped me realise the negative things that come with being different as a kid disappeared. Then changing my own mindset became easier as I wasnt feeling as negative about myself, after which i started working hard at my job which gave me so much amazing feedback as they were really happy with the work I was doing. (This wasnt focussing work but working at a restaurant, where forgetting can be a problem as ive encountered but just working hard and being active is really fullfilling) after which I even started achieving my educational goals because I accepted my flaws so I could see that trying to work the same as non adhd people didnt work for me and i had to do it my own way. And finally finding a girl who truly liked me for who I was and not for the person I pretended to be in high school. Made me realise I wasnt incapable or unworthy of being loved. Stay strong as times get hard, especially as looking far into the future can be hard for people with adhd. But my experiences proved me that with the right mindset everything will settle itself eventually!!!

This hit me so hard right in the feels. Untreated ADHD had me end up in a hospital for depression. I felt like such a useless failure. Getting treatment for ADHD did change my life and I’ve never gotten back to that place but it’s still a daily struggle that many people don’t even think is real.

This video made me cry... a lot. I haven't been diagnosed with ADHD. My therapist mentioned that I might have ADD, but I haven't got an official diagnosis on that, and honestly, I have no idea how to get one, and I want to avoid self-diagnosing. I wouldn't consider myself unsuccessful. I have evolved from an impoverished and complete unqualified kid to a paid professional above average, but I feel like I always have to swim upstream. After 20 years of a continuous effort to hide my weaknesses, I feel exhausted and depressed, and I'm burned out. I always think that I have to work twice as hard to keep up with my routine. It's painful to manage the backlash I get every time I mess up with my alerts and join a meeting late, even if that is rare. But unfortunately, this happens everywhere and with everyone, impacting my job and my relationships. I still feel that I have no tools to explain that I really want to be punctual, and my being late is not a sign of disrespect but a sign that I'm falling apart, and all the deterrents I have that would make me punctual have failed me. I think this is the most depressing part of my life. When I do my best (e.g. Pomodoro timers, scheduling time on my calendar for every task) and still fail.

I would like to see you do a video on how adult (hidden) adhd has impact on relationships.

@DrTraceyMarks

4 жыл бұрын

Take a look at this video and see what you think. kzread.info/dash/bejne/a6N7ra2FdbrPiZM.html

@sherrisolomon8673

3 жыл бұрын

@@DrTraceyMarks I hope this question isn't it to awkward but is this situation common in people with the space cadet aka dingbat syndrome?

@leroy77ruler21

3 жыл бұрын

"STAY SINGLE " HAVE A GOOD TIME SELF PLEASURE UR SELF WITH TOYS ...X LEARN MORE ABOUT WHAT THE WORLD HAS TO OFFER ..XXX

@carolinaavelar1939

2 жыл бұрын

Oliver Baby ADHD Oliver Baby Ollie ADHD the Speech Oliver Baby ADHD the Speech Oliver Baby ADHD the Speech Oliver Baby ADHD the Speech Oliver Baby ADHD the Speech Oliver Baby ADHD the Speech Oliver

Today I spoke to a family internal doctor about my possible ADHD, instead he told me that I was just a lazy person and that I should just change my career choices in school because if I’m not able to “study or focus” I should change my career. My emotional health has affected even more today. I couldn’t believe it. I didn’t even start searching videos until today. And thanks for your video, it made me feel better.

@damielforty-two7891

10 ай бұрын

Family doctors/general practitioners have VERY little training when it comes to ADHD, unless they’ve actively pursued it on their own. My GP went COLD and snapped at me “we don’t just hand out Adderall here!” when I had mentioned that I thought I maybe had ADHD - hadn’t asked about meds, had just told her I’d made an appointment with a therapist to work on the mental/behavioral things… It’s still “little boy who won’t sit still disease” to most people. It took another 2 years, but I got diagnosed, and started meds a couple of months ago. If I had “this brain” 35 years ago, my entire life would’ve been so different.

@NoName-zc5je

10 ай бұрын

​@@damielforty-two7891I came here to say the same thing. General practitioners know absolutely nothing about ADHD. You need to see a psychiatrist, neurologist, and/or therapist to get a diagnosis or treatment for ADHD. After you have documentation of your diagnosis then you can see a general practitioner for the monthly meds. A lot of GPs won't prescribe ADHD meds without documentation from a qualified specialist.

@bw5187

4 ай бұрын

@@damielforty-two7891 Tragic.

Just now in a condescending voice:"Yes, you do it this way. But normal people always do it that way". I am glad I saved this video to watch again.

I never thought about it this way.. I thought ADHD just meant I cant focus in class and I daydream a lot, but this makes total sense now! I actually almost didnt click on this video because lately I've been thinking that I just use ADHD as an excuse for all my shortcomings and inadequacies in life, but I'm really glad I did. It's so nice to know that this is not something unsolveable, that I can get around this and still reach my full potential. Thank you!

I really appreciate this video. I always feel as though ADHD is treated and brushed off as not serious or not real. I’ve been told by someone close to me that everybody has ADHD because everybody loses focus sometimes and that I just need to work harder. It made me feel like I was just one of the stupid ones for struggling with it since everyone had it according to them. From a young age I’ve felt inadequate compared to my friends or peers or other people in general. I fear I’ll be thought of as a whiny baby for struggling with something so “minor” and also fear that I am just a whiny baby who needs to get over it. It’s very difficult to find proper help and to decipher between my negative thoughts and my rational ones.

@DrTraceyMarks

4 жыл бұрын

Hey Caroline. You’re preaching to the choir on this one. I can’t stand hearing people say everyone has ADHD. It’s just shows how much people don’t really understand Can minimize it as not really being a disorder.

@theowlhouseseason3213

2 жыл бұрын

I feel u, therapist gaslighted me saying that everyone gets distracted you're normal, my ass I am pretty great and just because some neurons didn't get enough proteins to deliver happy hormones doesn't mean im incompetent

I’m not crying, you’re crying! It’s hard to not feel broken when your world continues to shatter and crack around you. This was rather eye opening. I’ll have to do some research on schema therapy, my gut tells me it would be highly effective for me.

I‘m almost 40 years old and got diagnosed with ADHD just 2 months ago. You discribe so many aspects of my problems in your videos! I never had a clue what‘s wrong and finally I find out that it‘s symptoms of a brain problem and not the core of an entirely flawed character.

@amgirl4286

Жыл бұрын

Me too, not diagnosed until 40. Having a hard time figuring out which meds to take. Should I feel different on. Adderall ? I have never been hyperactive and I think that’s why they missed it in school.

@EdParadis

Жыл бұрын

ditto. Finally diagnosed at 40 after years of "suspecting it" but everyone just telling me "you just need to try harder" or comparing myself to others. This video helped, a lot. but honestly, even some of the people I compare myself too also have ADHD and they somehow make it work better than I. :( It's hard to break that cycle Dr. Marks talks about.

I have been struggling my whole life. I just turned 33. I only recently met some people who, through lots of open discussion and experience, made me realize that I might have ADHD. I just discovered your videos recently, and I swear to God, it’s like you’re describing my life thus far to a T. I’m so frustrated, that this might be what was going on with me for so long, and I never knew. I’m trying to set something up with a psychiatrist soon, so I can get evaluated. I’m so tired of living like this. I really need help.

Also, I’ve never heard of Schema Therapy. Thank you.

@DrTraceyMarks

4 жыл бұрын

You’re welcome

@lucakat9262

3 жыл бұрын

@@DrTraceyMarks yes, great information! And Dr. Marks, all of the things you discussed in this video fits me to a T. I have all of these symptoms and have for years. Thanks for helping me to understand myself better. Now, if I could just find a great psychiatrist like you, then I would have it made. It is so difficult to find the right psychiatrist.🥺 But I keep trying.🙂

This reminds me of How to ADHD's videos on the "wall of awful"

@DrTraceyMarks

4 жыл бұрын

Hmmm. I’ll have to take a look. Thanks for the reference.

@Spring-lv7gr

4 жыл бұрын

@@DrTraceyMarks I would be interested in what your thoughts are about the "How to ADHD" channel and if what she presents is accurate/helpful.

@DrTraceyMarks

4 жыл бұрын

Spring 2020 I’ve only watched a few videos and enjoyed them. I don’t watch much mental health content on YT because when I’m not working I just want to chill and watch non-work related stuff. I wouldn’t want to watch for the purpose of critiquing her.

I've told people for years that I'm a defective human. I remember thinking all of these things - every single thing you said in the video - as far back as kindergarten, even preschool when I noticed at 5 years old that I wasn't the same as the other kids, they noticed it, and thus began the bullying and ostracizing. I'm crying, because this IS me. I quit doing stuff because I've always known I'll fail. It's been proven before. I suck. Nothing I do is right despite how hard I try. It's not enough. What's the point? It doesn't matter anyway. Why bother when I know everyone will just shame me, make fun of me, tell me I didn't try, laugh at me, prank me, tease me, tell me I'm stupid, and say "If you can't be anything, be an example of what not to do." - a family member told me that last one when I was 12 and struggling hard in school and life. Even though I try, those thoughts are always present. Always. It's like being in a boxing ring with a kangaroo and you're in a constant stalemate. This even shows up in the main character of my sci-fi fantasy book where he believes he's defective, because that's what he's been told, and he's not the same as the other humans around him. It's not until later that he realizes he isn't defective. He's just a different kind of human. He's not built like them because he's not one of them. Everyone else doesn't see the world the same way, or experience what he does, because they're not built like him. I'm at the point where he still believes he's defective despite being told and proven that he's not. He's lived with that for so long that he can't outright accept someone giving him the truth in a straight answer. He doesn't believe them even though it's very, very apparent - and the reader can see it. He can't believe it. It's going to take a long time for him to overcome those thoughts and schemas he developed and reprogram himself. However, he didn't give up on his dream like I did. He's a fighter. He fought through it all while still carrying all this past baggage. It was 200x harder for him than anyone, else, but he eventually - and in unexpected ways - got his ship, and his freedom. But that was only part of it. Whereas I don't have a physically-present support system, I made sure that he does. Another one of my other main characters has ADHD. It's easy to write for him, because I'm giving him my experiences, reactions, and thoughts. His twin doesn't have ADHD, but she shares a lot of his schemas, as they've experienced them together in a unique way. The only character who doesn't have this kind of past is the one I can't relate to the most - and she's the glue that holds everyone together. She's their rock, and absolutely necessary. My former writing mentor told me once that in order to find myself, I need look no further than the worlds I create, and the characters I create in them.

I can relate I suffered a lot of mental abuse as a kid and one of the things that damaged me the most was when I would get berated for screwing anything up I was told your not like other kids. That phrase destroyed me, and made so paranoid it ended causing me to not fit in and added to the issues of my bipolar. Mental abuse leaves scares as deep as any knife ever can

I've always truly believed that "nothing ever works out for me" and never connected it to my lifelong struggle with ADHD. Thank you so much for making the connection, Dr. Marks.

Holy moly. She has been reading my diary. I'm impressed.

My parents used to be really strict with me, Asian parents and all, never understood mental health all that well. I kind of think that my dad had ADHD when he was younger, gramps would often tell me that he sucked at school till right before hs graduation, he locked himself up to study. As strict as they were, with my organizations, procrastination, bad grades, etc, they also recognized what I was struggling with inside, even though they couldn't see the possible connections between my bad habits and a disorder. Now that I'm older, we've made more efforts understanding each other, I got meds prescribed, two RNDI's. I think they raised me as best as Asian parents who didn't understand mental illnesses could

55 years of going through this. You have given me one of the best understandings of myself. Thank you.

I got diagnosed as an adult about 4 years ago, i’ve been off my medication for half a year now due to losing my job which in turn made me lose my health insurance. I just started a new job and my ADHD is making me feel like such an idiot when i’m seeing other people work....

@marlowemichaelson1366

2 жыл бұрын

I saw this comment nine months after you wrote it. And I feel you bro. Much love.

When I started my anti-depressants, I began to notice I was late a lot more and couldn't focus in classes, I always did my projects the night before, and stayed up as late as I could to finish them. Then I was recommended to see an ADHD specialist, and surprise, I had moderate combined ADHD. Now I am on ADHD medication, and still, there are those things that are present. This explains so much for me, I just thought for the longest time there was something wrong with me. I was never diagnosed as a kid and had a tough time focuses and working in classroom environments, I worked as hard as I could but sometimes I would just forget things and be punished for them. Like this one teacher I had, when I was in grade 5 had us do multiplication sheets every couple of days, but sometimes I would forget to take them home or forget to bring them back to school. She had this counter on the board that if we didn't do them, we would get a point on the board, and when we reached 5 we had to miss recess and do "catch up" homework. After a few weeks I had ended up with 5 points on the board, and I had to stay behind and talk to the teacher about why I didn't hand them in, but I didn't have a reason and she wouldn't accept "I don't know" which lead to me crying because there was nothing else I could say other than I forgot, which lead to her asking why I forgot... which obviously I didn't have an answer for either.

@haidenmorgan

Жыл бұрын

She sounds crazy lol I hope you didn't take her too seriously

Thanks for your wisdom Dr. Tracey. This video made my cry. All my adult life I’ve felt ashamed of lacking self-control, being a flakey friend and not able to stick to hobbies or activities long term, overeating or drinking as a coping tool, and feeling sad about never realising my potential. I was diagnosed with ADHD adjust over a year ago at age 53. I have so much sadness for younger me. Your videos give me hope.

@DrTraceyMarks

Жыл бұрын

Thanks a bunch for the super thanks! I really appreciate it. It’s hard to think about last time, but I hope you’re able to make adjustments and have a different life trajectory. 👍🏽❤️ all the best to you

@k-rosebouvier3359

Жыл бұрын

Hey there, you're not alone! I'm 59 and was diagnosed 4yrs ago. This video really hits home for me too. We have to hang in there.

@k-rosebouvier3359

Жыл бұрын

Boy, this video describes me throughout my life. I'm glad to understand myself better through your videos. Thank you so much.

My problem is that I hate being told to think positively because it can turn into toxic positivity which I cannot tolerate.

I want to cry but I can't. I wish I found you earlier :( This is basically the story of my life. I never knew I had ADD. I am 33 years old. My life has been so wasted T.T

@FreeVoic3

2 жыл бұрын

Hey it's never too late and time 'wasted' is still useful experience! Accept it and look to the future with hope. You got this. You're okay you can do it

@hollaatmsv

2 жыл бұрын

I relate. I found out at 48!

@crimebrulee

2 жыл бұрын

I found out last year when I was 35 and suddenly my life made sense. I also think I went through the stages of grief. Lol Denial over having ADHD, Anger because I didn't get help as a child, Depression for "what could have been" .. etc. A year later I'm doing much better and I sincerely hope you are too.

@danpro4519

2 жыл бұрын

I just had a thought that ADHD is easier to dismiss in yourself when you're younger. I always told myself "I'm sure I'll figure this out when I'm ___ years old." But as time goes on, you realize that the patterns that get built won't go away on their own, and you feel completely stuck with a sense of a defective self. That's my experience, anyway.

@Fazal12d

2 жыл бұрын

scary when a video on youtube describes your entire Mindset So Perfectly, dont worry man i feel the same way.

All of these talking points describe me exactly, and I had no idea that others deal with the same experiences. Thank you so much for this video. 💗

@DrTraceyMarks

4 жыл бұрын

Yes indeed Brøadmand. You are so not alone with us. You’re welcome and thanks for watching.

@mmoonman13

4 жыл бұрын

@Paul Taylor you are an abuser.

@killiansirishbeer

4 жыл бұрын

@Paul Taylor Mmmh no just a bunch of traumatized, abused children who will grow up to be adults who are at more risks to be undereducated, to partake in substance abuse or some other kind of addiction, to suffer from depression (although I have a feeling you don't believe in that) and so many other consequences. But no you're right, people should hit their children every time they do something wrong or make a mistake instead of taking the time to take care for them, educate them, help them understand themselves and other and to teach awareness. Oh by the way, that last bit was sarcastic.

@aussie4662

4 жыл бұрын

@Paul Taylor Slapping is what people do, who don't know what to do. Instead of having children you might want to consider getting goldfish. They can turn out quite well even with an ignorant owner. Perfect for you Paul.

@legal040

4 жыл бұрын

@Paul Taylor you're insane, here you are trying to correct PSYCHOLOGY PROFESSIONALS and you're claiming someone else is trying to censor YOU? are you that stupid?

I am 53 and just now trying to unravel my mess of a life. I'm grateful for the diagnosis and I'm off to a great start! I'm so excited for all of the younger folks here. It warms my heart to see you all learning, growing and resolving much earlier in your lives. I'm grateful for wonderful Doctors, therapists and people making educational videos. Expansion expansion expansion!

@hectoralmonte3629

Жыл бұрын

Thanks for that positive comment. I also have it. I'm 50, here's to a better life by being informed.

“You can manage the negative consequences but YOU are NOT the negative consequences.” I didn’t realize until now that this is how I’ve thought of myself all my life. Now that you helped me recognize that, I can begin to change it. Thank you so much for this Dr. Marks ❤️

If you’re unsuccessful in life how do you afford a therapist

@josmclove4426

3 жыл бұрын

Good question

@Psalm_27.4

3 жыл бұрын

@Super Dupe Ninja If you live in the United States, and if you qualify, based on income, you can get medical and mental health care from your state government. You may want to call the Department of Social Services for your county. This applies to United States citizens. If you live outside of the United States, it may be a bit different, but your country may have helpful resources. Hope this helps. (Edited for correcting typos.)

@judithkimball2125

3 жыл бұрын

@@Psalm_27.4 Yes indeed, you may also qualify for a neuropsychological evaluation, a sleep study if sleep or a lack of sleep is an issue, different therapies (behavioral therapy), psychology, transportation if driving becomes an issue...

@amyavani7017

3 жыл бұрын

Get on Medicaid. Then they can give you a list of therapists who can help you who take medicaid.

@bigupyuself

3 жыл бұрын

@@Psalm_27.4 Yes, I just google free mental Healthcare in my county and receive good help from them. They don't test or treat ADD though. But I found testing online for $149.

My mom' always told me "dr phil says you do things because you expect to get something out of it- you lose your keys because you want attention, you procrastinate because secretly you _want_ to feel pressure" It's taken years to unteach myself this, and this video has helped along the way ♡︎

This made me cry. And I loved reading the other comments. I have undiagnosed early ADHD and was diagnosed in my 40’s. It’s been a journey of revelation and I see how I’ve developed strategies myself to combat many of the challenges almost by accident, but it’s never changed how I felt inside. You are an angel. Thank you. I’m watching every minute of everything you make about ADHD.

@livelystones7773

2 жыл бұрын

Are you taking medication and how’s it going?

The side effect of mental illness, self hate and insecurity - is sometimes an overlooked side effect. Moods and paranoia are side effects but the other effect of self doubt or hate just makes everything worse.

Thank you for this. I have never watched a video that was so validating for me. I wasn't diagnosed with ADHD until I was 20. I was high functioning and an A student so on the outside no-one would have guessed how much I was really struggling. I believe my perfectionism drove me to succeed despite the extra challenges I faced but I also told people "there's something wrong with me" and "I'm not actually that smart. I just work hard." because I would spend six hours doing what one of my peers could complete in 30 minutes. I have excessive difficulty getting started on projects and starting major life changes (like going back to school and finding a new job) because I have such a negative association with the anxiety and the emotional pain I've felt in the past. I'm still learning how to manage my anxiety without completely avoiding things and it's a challenge.

@scienceguy6918

2 жыл бұрын

This is me too! I finished high school with a 95% and everyone thought I was the smartest guy but it’s just because I worked hard! I think I have a lot of problems but no one can see them!

@DJM3KS

Жыл бұрын

This is me. I feel like everyone around me has it all together and winning and I'm a loser. I'm almost 40 and only realising now that I had ADHD

@musebychloe

Жыл бұрын

this is literally me to a t! im currently a junior in college with a 3.8 gpa. ive literally excelled in my academics but it has been almost physically painful and exhausting to do so. i recently told my friend i had adhd and she was so shocked, saying that she never would’ve guessed and that i have always kept it together. but underneath it all i deal with so much self doubt and the emotional turmoil from that leaves me so depressed.

@TheDevilRunner7

Жыл бұрын

Wild how a lot of people have such similar experiences, me included. I was also diagnosed at 20. 100% high functioning. But goddamn, my emotional issues were slowly taking over in my last year of undergrad. Now I'm totally medicated and am now in grad school. We've got this. Just have to keep rolling and finding what works

Doctor, I suffered over the years with this ADHD. This condition caused me to have a very negative view of myself! I lost so many great jobs and friendships because of this problem. Back in my day, people just said she is crazy! They would asked my mother, " where did you get this one from? She's different! But, you know what doctor! I learn to embrace being different. It was more fun and less boring being different. Ofcourse this this time, for me to feel this way. It was very hard as a child. But, my mother would tell me and others. Oh, leave her alone! She's got to find her own way! She hears a different drum from the rest of us! Now, I'm very positive. Try to see the good in everyone, but I will let you know. Don't play with me , because I'm not the one! And I'm a happy person(most of the time). And when I'm not, I think positive. Keep it moving. Thank you so much. I love your helpful videos. Be happy.

I wonder how many of us cried while watching this. You are speaking to my soul here, ma'am❤️

I have watched this video about 50 times already. It really really helps to think that I am not my negative consequences. Thank you so much for making me realise that I am separate from the negative consequences. Your video is the start of trying to build up my broken self esteem that has been ripped apart as my ADHD went undiagnosed for so many years (until this year). So thank you for this fantastic video 🙏🏼

@DrTraceyMarks

2 жыл бұрын

50 times? 😀 I guess I need a follow up. I'm so glad it's helped you. I see what I can come up with for a follow up. I hope you have a great holiday.

This explains my life far too exact. All my life having the feeling of incompetence, unreliability, others being frustrated with me for not understanding clear instructions from professors/instructors, constant failures in my professional goals and pessimism cause a downward spiral of depression. I am now 30 years old and started getting the help that I need. Maybe I can now still reach my goals.

This is EXACTLY what has happened to me. Actually I was diagnosed with ADHD as a child but I also have Tourette's syndrome, I didn't pay much attention to it. Now, as a grown man, I have a HUGE procrastination and anxiety problem which has severely affected every aspect of my life and I don't know how to change it.

Stumbled in here on accident, greatly respect your careful language and frank presentation style. When something isn't well understood, or needs a caveat, you just say so. When things can be clarified, you do so. A lot of psych stuff on YT drifts too far from the scientific, and plays into pop psych. Short lists, single topics, lack of waste in speech. It's admirable.

Bro its been 3hours plus I'm searching about this and everything makes sense now

I have recently been diagnosed with ADHD. I am a 56 year old man and been sober in AA 24 years. Thank you Dr T M, your video has been very helpful. God bless you 👍❤️

@funeralangel8262

4 жыл бұрын

👍Great with sobriety! Hope you are well.❤

Dr. Marks, I’ve just gotta’ tell you: DAMN, you’re good. What an asset to the planet. Thanks for the data and time you put into your content. So helpful, to so many.

@whome2289

4 жыл бұрын

Stefan Hayes, I second that!

@crunchydorito1120

3 жыл бұрын

Definitely. Thank you!

@malin9454

2 жыл бұрын

A person would be so lucky to have her as their doctor!

When she said all experience , I felt like hiding my face behind my hand and look away , I know how that affected my huge trauma

Dr. Marks, do you ever sit down and like ever get hit by the magnitude of how many of us you help through your videos? Or how much easier you make it to move through the clinical landscape and get better results because of it? I sincerely hope you do. Because you genuinely are making A difference in mine, and I can't imagine that I am the only one. These videos on ADHD has been mind blowing.

So true. Just got one of my younger boys a book called, "Love the Fur You're In" (Sesame Street), with Grover. It's a great read for ADHD children.

@DrTraceyMarks

4 жыл бұрын

I love that title!!

For years I've considered myself ADHD. I display all of the tell tale signs and symptoms. I was diagnosed in childhood. But I am slowly realizing that maybe I am not. I am realizing that where I was saying 'oh its just my ADHD' I was really masking what I knew was the origin and that was an extremely emotionally and physically abusive household. I started researching cptsd and everything points to that resulting in the same symptoms. Disassociation ('spaced out'),hyperfocus, depression...high heart rate, negative thoughts about myself. I don't know now....I think maybe it's something that doctors and therapists should really consider during diagnosis.

Where was the information you offer 30 years ago?! I finally am comfortable with who I am and have managed, in large part, to learn to compensate…at 50 yrs of age. It took me decades to “therapise” myself (through abusive marriage, divorce, unequal friendships, being taken advantage of, credit debt, depression and half a year of antidepressants). THANK YOU for providing understanding to those who feel misunderstood. THANK YOU for helping those who feel helpless. THANK YOU for making your knowledge easily available to those who cannot afford a therapist. We are not alone and videos like yours encourage feelings of inclusion, hope and the possibility of solutions to our lifelong daily struggles. THANK YOU!!!

I love this woman’s voice, her gracefulness, the way she helps us understand our brains. Thank you so much ☺️

I've never been in a relationship because i know i can never focus on my partner. I'm unable to make friends either

@judithkimball2125

3 жыл бұрын

Join a ADHD group online or call 211 to help you find assistance or an ADHD support group in your area. You may be surprised of the resources available to you to help you get your life back.

Thanks for this. I work in a high school, and this is a good reminder and explanation why we need to be patient and understanding with our students. I've forwarded it to all of the staff at my work.

@DrTraceyMarks

4 жыл бұрын

Oh that’s great Eva you are so right. In the hustle and bustle of the day it’s so easy to forget and see it as all behavioral (lazy, apathetic, etc) I hope people on your staff watch it and are enlightened.

I'm on the autism spectrum and sometimes I deal with self hatred like I don't need to live anymore

I am 54 and was just diagnosed October 2022. I’m being treated through adhd online I live in a rural town and there are no specialists close to me. I use an online council if site for therapy along with my meds. I would give anything if I had access to a doctor like you. No one understands how this affects me and my therapist is not well versed in adhd therapy. I love your videos and the way you present the therapy. You talk to us not at us or down to us.

As a cognitive science major and ADHD (inattentive subtype) patient, this video especially resonated with me. I had never heard of schema therapy before and now feel compelled to explore it further. I also hope there will be more ADHD-focused content on your channel in the future, your insights are so valuable (and evidence-based, unlike many mental health videos these days!). :)

@DrTraceyMarks

4 жыл бұрын

Thanks a lot I’m so glad you found this video helpful. Yes it’s been a while since I’ve produced an 80 HD video. I end up making a lot of videos based on view or requests but I guess I haven’t gotten that many ADHD requests. I came up with this idea on my own. But I’ll have more

@xheartsandhoofbeatsx

4 жыл бұрын

@@DrTraceyMarks I blame my executive dysfunction for not making an ADHD request sooner. 😂👍

2:33 its so interesting because all these things became things I am super vigilant and controlling over. I trained it and hyper focused it all away. I cant be bad anything once I discover it needs work

@Rael-777

Жыл бұрын

This comment is me ^

@joshn7114

Жыл бұрын

Yeah me too, but unfortunately I don't think it's the answer. In my experience controlling these core beliefs just leads to perfectionism. And perfectionism is self-destructive. When we should be learning how to replace inaccurate beliefs about ourselves with healthy-striving and not seeking perfection to hide these underlying schemas. I recommend reading the gifts of imperfections By Brené Brown. It's great for learning how to strive in a healthy way and how to embrace being human(imperfect).

@necilya

Жыл бұрын

I hope I will get there one day. I decided that this year was the year. I need to get myself together. I know my defects, I need to work on them.

@moemoney444

Жыл бұрын

@@necilya it takes continuous work and self awareness, but once we get into a habit we got it

@ShoulderMonster

Жыл бұрын

@@necilya I see your yearly goal, I recommend the New Year's Theme video by CGP Grey! I've been taking this approach for my third year now instead of New Year's Resolutions, and I feel so much better from it. Like I actually made real progress. Personal TL;DR below: First year my theme was Completion among other things, but my self-worth was still so low, so I couldn't complete much of anything. I had approached the year with way too much ambition and high, perfectionistic expectations still. I felt awful about myself. Last year my theme was Self Care and Rest. Rest I didn't do so well still admittedly, but yes on the self care! I discovered so many things about myself and even did a better job of not apologizing for everything, not letting other people make me think the worst of myself. I discovered and got assessed that I likely have inattentive ADHD, among other comorbid conditions. Reassessed my values and goals in life, and really examined that I'm not a failure for not having met many of them. Just a lot of mental health care. I ended the year feeling revitalized and eager to push myself again. So this year my theme is Improvement. My ultimate goal is completion, but I don't think I'm quite ready go get there yet, so improving on any little or big thing will be more than enough for now. :) And that's my little story, haha

I've never felt called out by every second of a video before. This one just did it.

"Some people don't know they are limping along"! Thanks!

I cried while watching this. Thank you for making me feel seen and helping me put into words what it feels like to live with ADHD

I have had all of those thoughts and beliefs since a small child .. I always felt like I was broken, not right, defective.

I hate that I found this channel. You make me understand what is wrong with me.

This is the only channel I've found that recognizes how demoralizing adhd can really be

These are the reasons why I am not too tough on my adhd son and why I believe he doesn't have the behavior issues commonly associated with adhd. Now the way the school looks at him, different story, but thank you for this!! I will have him watch as well💙.

@HyperGameDev

4 жыл бұрын

You sound like a great parent for someone with ADHD! 💖

@DrTraceyMarks

4 жыл бұрын

Yes sadly schools can be a problem. I don’t think teachers get a lot of training on ADHD and how to handle it. And they can get so overwhelmed with all that they have to do they don’t have time to take into consideration individual differences and challenges. Especially when those challenges involve behavior.

@ebisawkward

4 жыл бұрын

This is exactly why I'm not sure I like working in education. There's not a lot in place to actually teach us about how kids with ADHD learn and think, and focuses more on getting them to comply which I hate.

@shymommie

4 жыл бұрын

@@HyperGameDev thank you! I really do try❤

@shymommie

4 жыл бұрын

@@DrTraceyMarks I recognize that and it is a shame. Some teachers go the extra mile to accommodate and are great! But then some still dont even believe ADHD is real 😩.

I fight this everyday, but this therapy has helped me. This and that I need to be a positive role model for my children.

I'm an adult 58 years old with bipolar 1 and ADHD and I never dreamed that it would be getting worse as I get older. Thank you so much for your wisdom and knowledge and your time on your videos

The main problem really is inattentiveness I can't read a file or I have to rewatch a video a million times to actually listen to it. This leads to academic and work failures.

i didn't know ADHD affects me THAT much, until i got checked and i started listening to your videos. THANK YOU SO MUCH!

I needed this so badly. I've never been diagnosed, but I'm almost positive I have ADHD. I never knew that it could affect me in this way though. This helps so much. Thank you, Dr. Tracey♡.

@firepatriot42

2 жыл бұрын

I know I am, was in my early teens, took meds for a while but then went off them, bad choice as its only gotten worse in my adult yrs.

how just how... here I am crying my eyes out to this vid. Feeling finally understood after 21 years.

Finding self acceptance is important for people suffering with ADHD. A good loving support group can help. I am thankful to have one myself.

"Lacking self-control robs you of free will."

This is so accurate. How much i wish someone would have explain this to me from my childhood years.

I was diagnosed with ADHD as a young child. Was taught to control it using cognitive behavioral therapy, and still had minor problems, but nothing serious. When I was in high school, after I had been diagnosed with PTSD and major depression, the school I attended forced us to medicate me and I had severe bad reactions to the meds (I don't remember if it was adorall or Ritalin) and I started having violent mood swings. My mom got a lawyer involved to make the school district allow me to attend without meds. I was severely bullied and then would get punished by the school for fighting back. I'm a small woman and I was being physically bullied and hit by both girls and guys . Ended up dropping out my junior year because of it. I now have a bachelor's degree and a decent job full time. I'm able to work well without much trouble at all. But I have no motivation to cook, clean, etc when I'm home. I've thought about going to therapy again but have had bad experiences with therapy as an adult in the area I live. Do you have any advice for how to find a good therapist that won't push meds?

I was, and at 73, was, and am, told what disappointment I was/am. Shame has been a constant in my life. I was severely punished for getting angry, and to this day, have a hard time expressing it. An astute friend said I take anger, and turn it into hurt, depression... This video is my life.

I’m 29 and when I was younger I used to take concerta and I stoped when I was 15 because I didn’t like how it made me feel. My whole life I’ve been mad at the fact that I’m a writer but never finish work. The whole pressure of turning 30 without finishing a script gives me such anxiety. Now I know I haven’t failed at it. I hope you see this comment because I’d really like you to know how grateful I am 🙏🏾🌻🙂

Ouch. I just got hit with reality. Thank you I needed this

@DrTraceyMarks

4 жыл бұрын

You’re welcome Zuffer 😊

It’s refreshing to know that someone understands me and that I’m not alone.

@Brandon-tz5pn

2 жыл бұрын

Same Its such a relief

This is eerily resonant. She just portrayed the course of my life..