She only cares about her own baby. The stepson needs help.

@jvogt4643

11 ай бұрын

That’s not her child. Her baby is her only real concern.

Imagine how easier this would be if she didn't have an "us" child with her fiance.

@Feliciations

11 ай бұрын

He needs to kick her the hell out. Too bad they have a kid.

@Gigi-zd8vi

11 ай бұрын

This comment 🎉🎉🎉

@mademoisellesura

11 ай бұрын

Exactly! Then she could just leave. It’s truly unfortunate that she had a child with this man. I personally think she still should leave, and I know this might sound dramatic, but she should sue for custody of their baby too. Given the circumstances I think she would have a good case. He’s obviously not a good parent.

@nly4607

11 ай бұрын

@@mademoisellesura yeah don't blame the woman with 37 different forms of birth control for having a baby with him.... Tell her to leave take his money or my taxpayer dollars.... Jesus christ modern women are hopeless

@sarcodonblue2876

11 ай бұрын

​@@nly4607when women don't have kids because they realize they have trauma and mental health problems they are labelled as "selfish "modern men of course are so reasonable and never abuse or harm any one and want partnerships and not take control 😂

The question is how a 15 yo ended addicted to Fentanyl ? ! The boy needs serious help ASAP

@emmaleebuzzard1023

11 ай бұрын

I knew people in high school that would buy drugs. They buy them like other addicts do- from dealers. 😢

@MissHolliday3110

11 ай бұрын

They get it quite easily, unfortunately. They even have some that look like candy to appeal to kids.

Dr. John, you dropped the ball on this call. This woman is not an adult, she is playing with several people's lives. She needs to grow the hell up. A 15 year old is a CHILD. He needs help, not to be kicked out of his house.

@sarahshanahan2222

11 ай бұрын

If the dad doesn't set boundaries... she is not able to help

@valeriewoods6882

11 ай бұрын

You like living with teenaged opiod addicts with your toddler in the home? That's a great environment for the baby. What if he got into the teenager's drugs? The dad needs to remove the addict from the home. They need to separate.

@Feliciations

11 ай бұрын

@@valeriewoods6882 she knew what she was getting into. This wasn't a new problem. You date a parent, their kid is your kid. They are a packaged deal. Also, keep in mind that is her daughter's older brother she is harshly criticizing and unwilling to help.

@Feliciations

11 ай бұрын

@@sarahshanahan2222 she clearly despises the kid and probably thinks she knows everything about parenting. She doesn't. But I will tell you that if this is how she operates, karma will get her later, because life has a way of working like that. Remember, her kid and her kid's brother share the same father. All of the adults here are irresponsible idiots.

@jill9606

11 ай бұрын

YES!! Agreed.

I've listen to this woman 3 minutes and I'm ready to overdose.

@NeiveVeve

11 ай бұрын

😂

@landshark7684

11 ай бұрын

I know she’s a heartless B

@ae3209

11 ай бұрын

Hahahahahahaha same 😂

@firefly9838

11 ай бұрын

Yup never done drugs but I'm going to start

@instahamx684

11 ай бұрын

Exactly. She is pure evil.

Important: I know she keeps saying stepmom and even the title says it but she is NOT. They are not married so she has no legal custody over him. It’s her boyfriend who needs to deal with him and she’s right she needs to make sure her daughter is safe from this mess.

@juicysmith38235

11 ай бұрын

Even if you are married, she would still have no legal rights to the child. Only the biological parents have rights.

@fauxbro1983

11 ай бұрын

We'll she can break off the wedding. Asking a man to throw out his juvenile son is pretty wild. This woman is a retard

@TruckieLooks4Aliens

11 ай бұрын

Yeah but they still have a home together and they have a kid together so she does have rights to the child she shares with him. She does have legal rights to her home. Maybe she should have set boundaries for the person she had a kid with.

@Waylaid13

11 ай бұрын

@@TruckieLooks4Aliens Or... and I know this sounds crazy, but hear me out...maybe what she should have considered doing was not having kids with someone that she wasn't married to.

@Feliciations

11 ай бұрын

@@Waylaid13 who already had a kid, who had issues.

We have an “ours” child and a “theirs” child - what a hot mess. These are the people procreating in America today.

Why are they talking about the 15 year old child like livestock? Where is the empathy?

The 15 years old is a child and needs help. You can't say "my daughter lives here, you are out!" You are not married, guys. The 15 years old needs his father.

He is still a 15 yo CHILD! He needs help and not to be abandoned by his father. I understand where the girlfriend is coming from regarding to harm coming to the baby but she doesn’t seem to care about the son at all.

@katemiller7874

11 ай бұрын

I agree. Shame that she’s a mother. A true mother would embrace this boy and try to help him

@penelopesanchez1679

11 ай бұрын

@@katemiller7874 at least rehab, something. I understand it’s hard dealing with an addict but try to get him help before washing your hands of him.

@Feliciations

11 ай бұрын

She is a narcissist piece of crap. You can hear it in her voice. She is a horrible person.

@jvogt4643

11 ай бұрын

15… is 2 years and some change from being an adult. If you’re going to be a child. Be in a child’s place and respect the adults household… However, the father is the issue because he’s not setting ground rules

@NealBurkard-ut1oo

11 ай бұрын

Yeah it's pretty odd that she's insisting she's protecting her daughter of the trauma of having the boy die in the house. Her fiance is the boys Father! And I can tell she expects the fiance to put her before the boy ALL the time. She doesn't seem to be in touch with reality. It's illegal to kick out the 15 year old boy. Sadly he's the biggest victim here. Opiate users often have childhood trauma that's unhealed.

I am surprised the focus is not on getting this poor kid help. She seems totally unconcerned about him. Why isn't she proactive in finding him help?

@John-du2mq

11 ай бұрын

Because she would have to come yo terms with her relationship with the father is part of the issue of the addiction. Whether it's justified or not that's the reality.

@dolphinbear661

11 ай бұрын

She's busy. With a BABY.

@deborahcamillerobinson9247

11 ай бұрын

I'm glad I wasn't the only one who thought this... There is a good point about her trying to care for her daughter but this boy is her family as well.

@katemiller7874

11 ай бұрын

It’s because she doesn’t care about him. His father picked the wrong woman. A lot of them do

@katemiller7874

11 ай бұрын

Fish sticks- you are so wrong. He’s young enough he can come back and have a great life. Parents don’t give up on their kids ever!

He didn't even mention getting the kid help...what the hell, John??? I understand protecting the youngest, but who is protecting the 15 YO???

@flashthecorgi2053

11 ай бұрын

I’m guessing since police and Ems were involved in the almost overdose they would be getting him help from there.

@katemiller7874

11 ай бұрын

Yes that’s what I thought. 15 is a tough age. Sounds like mom’s house wasn’t Safe. Dad doesn’t care. No one is focused on this boy

@KatieBellino

11 ай бұрын

I was shocked that he didn't remind her of this??!! He's a minor and she's being the evil stepmom. "Good for you." He says. Like, no, his father has a responsibility to protect and help his son. Telling a minor that they can't live with you if...is totally wrong. So unimpressed with this woman.

@fairlyenjoyable

11 ай бұрын

If the child's father is enabling his behavior, then she really can only do so much.

@suen5006

11 ай бұрын

@@flashthecorgi2053 Oh no, not unless they have social workers they only do so much. They just don't have time to do more.

Stacy, it’s NOT your Daughter.. it’s OUR Daughter.

@Feliciations

11 ай бұрын

Yep. This woman is disgusting.

Am I wrong that I hear no compassion in her voice towards this child struggling with addiction? Yes, you HAVE to be firm with setting boundaries with this child BUT you also have to have compassion, understanding, get him therapy, counseling and most of all pray for this child whose dealing with personal issues she obviously has no clue of or just doesn't care. I've dealt with someone near and dear to me that had this addiction and it's a long strenuous road to walk on with them. 💔🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽🙏🏽 Praying for him and all others who are going through this.

@Gigi-zd8vi

11 ай бұрын

It is hard to have compassion for people who are not family. Some people don’t even have compassion for their own family members. There is a misconception that a woman dating a man who has a child should be ready and willing to see that child as her own. In most cases it takes years before that happens. Bonding takes time. It took me at least 10 years to see my stepfather as fatherly material. I didn’t start calling him my stepdad until about five years ago. My mom and my stepdad have been together for 20 years. While I feel so deeply for that young man, that is his father’s responsibility. She is not even married to his father. She made a poor decision in deciding to have a baby with his father and now she’s in a mess of a situation. I feel for everyone involved.

@DarcyCarmen

11 ай бұрын

Your post reads as someone who has never been adjacent to addiction. Try watching someone circle the drain for months or years and you can do nothing to stop them but you CAN bear all the consequences of their actions and all the stress and trauma they put you through. At some point you have to cut them off emotionally and not go down with the ship.

@loveubye2288

11 ай бұрын

@@DarcyCarmen if he was an adult this would make sense but the fact it's a child changes everything . You can't have already given up hope and cut off a 15yr old child , it's not even legal, but even morally pawning him off on CPS is immoral.

@loveubye2288

11 ай бұрын

@@DarcyCarmen you can tell she just doesn't care about him, if it was her daughter who grows up & goes through this & almost dies i doubt she would have the same attitude, she would do everything to help her.

@loveubye2288

11 ай бұрын

She has no compassion for him, she only cares about her daughter. Even if he died outside the home that is still trauma for her daughter so it makes no sense

This woman said MY house and MY child vs. step-son. She got herself into this mess. She probably thought she could figure out a way to villainize the 15 year old so she can have her own family without her husband’s past. HE’S 15!!! What is wrong with this woman?? She’s in the wrong here. The adults in this child’s life are failing him. No wonder he’s on drugs. The father needs to step in and do the right thing. He needs to get his child help and tell his new wife that she needs to accept he has a previous child and treat him as her own or SHE needs to leave!

How dehumanizing for the child because he's not the "ours" child. Whether they say that around him or not I guarantee they treat him like it.

@Feliciations

11 ай бұрын

Yep, totally agree. He is crying out for someone to love him, and all of the adults in his life are like "nah".

@janebaker4912

11 ай бұрын

I'm sure he's used the "poor me" "feel sorry for me" card enough. That's why he is where he is.

@coxrocks25

11 ай бұрын

@janebaker4912 i don't know how you have enough data to assume that. Even if it were the case it would be because that was modeled for him. I've got a lot of grace for kids from divorced homes. Divorce it's so traumatic for kids.

So where is the kid's biological mom?

@katemiller7874

11 ай бұрын

Living in the unsafe home probably with another man

She laughed describing that he almost died... no empathy. Send the kid to rehab, he's still a child even behaving this way. He's never "going away" since he's the BROTHER of your child regardless of what your relationship is with the father.

@Feliciations

11 ай бұрын

100%. She is a terrible mother. Mark my words, she will screw up her daughter too.

@addiskassa5165

11 ай бұрын

I do not like her sound either! Please God help this child!🙏

I feel terrible for the kid. She keeps referring to the boy as her “fiancé’s kid” and their “together kid”. Do not marry someone that does not treat your children as their own. If anything ever happens to my wife, my kiddos are #1. There is no ours or hers. If you marry someone with a kid. They come as a package and you must take both as your own. This is unacceptable.

@vtvincent4893

11 ай бұрын

That's something I wish John would've touched on... that kind of language right there shows just how little they both think of the marriage.

@deborahcamillerobinson9247

11 ай бұрын

💯💯💯

@flashthecorgi2053

11 ай бұрын

@@vtvincent4893well maybe the problem is she is not even a stepmom because they aren’t married! I’m really suprised john didn’t catch that!

@katemiller7874

11 ай бұрын

This is excellent advice. She is not good step mom material. She needs to go.

@DarcyCarmen

11 ай бұрын

She has no say over this kid, and he’s going off the rails. You can’t just become a parent to a stepchild, because the kid’s actual parents have the say and quite frankly I wouldn’t want a stepparent inserting them self in the situation if it was my kid. I like her attitude towards protecting her daughter, and it’s obviously been made clear to her that she has no say over the stepson’s behaviour.

She has every right and duty to protect her daughter. And she should. She sounds way too focused on the son. She makes it sound like if the 15 year old goes away everything will be fine. But she's ignoring the fact that her fiance isn't taking steps to protect their daughter (the "our" child. GROSS) They are only engaged. She doesn't have to marry this guy. Until they are married, he gets to pick his son over her. I hope that kid wakes up and stops going down the wrong path. It seems like she picked this guy, knowing that he's not a great father, but because the "our" child is special, he's supposed to clean up his act and have a perfect family now.

@katemiller7874

11 ай бұрын

He’s got an addiction. He needs help. Father and mother are worthless

@Gigi-zd8vi

11 ай бұрын

You are absolutely correct!

@loveubye2288

11 ай бұрын

So if they were married you think he shouldn't take responsibility for his 15yr old minor child who almost just died? The one he knew he was responsible for before he ever met her?

@nly4607

11 ай бұрын

So you think she should leave and have my tax dollars support her lifestyle and pay for that mistake she had with a guy she considers a loser.... Until she can dupe another innocent man into supporting her and her kid with the loser.... Women really need to start saying what they believe out loud so they can hear how ridiculous they sound

Yes, the 14 month old needs to be safe. The father is out of control buying addictive substances for his child!! What the heck?? Child protective services should have stepped in LONG ago, and the 15 year old needs inpatient care. I sincerely hope that young man overcomes his substance abuse disorder ❤

@gbear34

11 ай бұрын

She's out of control for being engaged to this person. Lol It'll never work out for them, which is sad.

@KatieBellino

11 ай бұрын

I do think the "dad" buying substances for his son says a lot about his parenting. He's not a good parent and this caller probably needs to consider that and move out with their daughter.

@marquisstrongchild7535

11 ай бұрын

@@gbear34 thats what I said. She's either planning something evil, or she's really stupid

And this will always be the problem with blended "families". She's not really that invested in his welfare, obviously.

@Feliciations

11 ай бұрын

Yep. So sad for the kid.

@landshark7684

11 ай бұрын

Yea the 15 year old is clearly a turd in the punch bowl in her life. She doesn’t care. It’s a burden to her.

Wow, this is terrible. Get that 15 year old some HELP! Quickly!! This woman is nauseating!!😢

Maybe this woman should wait until she is promoted to wife before trying the power play. She uses "MY" and "HIS" too much in talking about the kids as she says in 4:18. My guess is she would be looking for a reason to kick out the stepson even if he were an Eagle Scout and Honors Student because he is not "My child".

@katemiller7874

11 ай бұрын

Right most women would embrace the boy and show him love and support

I am shocked about how this conversation is staring considering he's 15

The father needs to send his son to rehab. He failed him as a father. I don't blame this woman for not wanting him in the house. Not only is it unsafe but it's very dangerous. Stand your ground! Get him out and get him help. He's crying out for help.

@nly4607

11 ай бұрын

Emotional female hands typed this lol care to guess the success rate for rehab? l o l She picked him now what taxpayers fund her and her mistake's lifestyle until she can dupe another innocent man into footing the bill for her and her kid with a guy she considers a loser? I think women need to say what they believe out loud and hear how ridiculous it sounds

@jill9606

11 ай бұрын

Yes, get him help, but she never once mentioned that! She has no desire to rehabilitate that poor teen.

If a man you are dating has a very troubled child, step away so the father can completely focus on his child. This isn't ricket science, but people pur their live lives over the well-being of children.

Stacy is NOT wrong for setting boundaries. I put the blame on the dad for not seeking help or do whatever he can for his 15 year old son. ❌❌❌ I think he needs to END this relationship and focus on helping his child. There is no way I will allow my spouse, girlfriend, boyfriend stop me for having my child over yo my house. At the end of the day he still a minor.

I kind of wish Dr. John would have gone into some detail about how they should be helping the 15-year-old boy. He is still a child and still needs his parents. It sounds like Dr. John was saying that kicking him out at 15 years old is the right thing to do? Obviously, this kid needs treatment.

@addiskassa5165

11 ай бұрын

Exactly! I couldn't believe what I heard, he is just a kid for God sake, Why our society so cold this much when comes to love one another, He is dealing with this unknown demon cased may be the parents bring him in this world, I wonder why so many people in the street, Please God help us!🙏

@brettemiller8046

11 ай бұрын

This gal isn't the mother and the father is an enabler, what can she really do?

@sarahshanahan2222

11 ай бұрын

​@@brettemiller8046exactly true.

Why is he dating her? Dump her and go take care of your kid. This woman has no compassion it’s not her kid

This is why women should not get involved with men who have children.

@erikak128

11 ай бұрын

This is why (^* COLD HEARTED) women should not get involved with men who have children. I've met some incredible step parents, this woman is not it.

Stacy is a walking red flag.

She has no compassion for the kid, she just wants him gone so she can enjoy her "life", having the boyfriend and her kid as a "stable family". She wants to get rid of the kid, but keep the father. She should either keep both or let go of both. The 15 year old never did anything threatening or dangerous to the new baby, so I don't know why she's saying she's trying to "protect" her baby - she "seems" more concerned that "her kid could find the teenager overdosed in the bathtub" than her potential stepson actually overdosing and dying. She just wants to get rid of him. But you can't love the man and not care what becomes of his kids. If she's saying the man enabled his son, then why is she sticking with him? Isn't that what could become of her kid too? She just reeks of evil to me though. The father is totally useless too though.

@mekeiawatson

11 ай бұрын

How about the boy or the father owes the dealer and then the dealer shoots up the house killing the toddler? That's dangerous. But the father is toxic and she's needs to leave

@marquisstrongchild7535

11 ай бұрын

@@mekeiawatson the father's toxic, and she's just pure evil. Why would she choose to have a family with a guy like that knowing her kid could become an addict later? Its because she is either really dumb, or she has an evil plan. And it shows in the way she talks.

I hate single parents who don’t prioritize their kids. You can’t expect someone else who has no ties to your kid to come in and make them their #1. That’s why it’s so important for parents to have their kids as their number one priority. If you can’t do that then don’t have kids, or don’t go around having more kids, because you’re a failure. How many times are you setting yourself up to fail. As for this women, an “ours child” congratulations on setting these siblings up to not form a wonderful relationship. You had a child with this man knowing he had a kid from a previous relationship and now you’re setting up boundaries between child and parent. Disgusting. You are at fault as well. You put yourself in this situation and chose to bring another child into this mess. Your fiancé enables bad habits in his eldest child, and you thought “yea he’s a great candidate for father”. Please. God forbid this happens to your daughter.

@nly4607

11 ай бұрын

I hate single moms too

@MusicFreak61594

11 ай бұрын

@@nly4607 what?! I'm not specifying. Mom or Dad it applies to both. I literally said "PARENT". And I only meant the ones who don't put their kids first. There are wonderful single parents out there who know what it means to be a parent.

@nly4607

11 ай бұрын

@MusicFreak61594 Sure, exceptions probablybexist but i've never met a good single mom and i've had sex with probably thirty or forty of them and am a Slumlord renting out units to mostly single moms...

@nly4607

11 ай бұрын

@@MusicFreak61594 maybe I just got a hundred bad ones

@jennifert2953

11 ай бұрын

Wow. I really like this comment. The only thing is, she does have a kid with him. No going back not. And if it's not going to work, she has a responsibility to give her child a great life.

Idk how I feel about this call. There should’ve been more focus on getting the child some help. He’s wayyy too young to be addicted to opioids and it makes me believe that he uses as an escape because he doesn’t have a safe environment at dad’s or mom’s house. I have a feeling that if it was her daughter addicted to opioids at that age (God forbid), then this call and her tone would’ve been ENTIRELY different.

She talks too much! Jesus she’s exhausting 😢

That teen needs to go to rehab.... Get clean!!!

So why hasn't a boot camp been talked about or some other treatment program. She's not helping. A 15 year old that's got an addiction issues has a butt ton of trauma from her fiance and his mama's bs and lack of parenting. Stop blaming the kid.

@Feliciations

11 ай бұрын

Exactly. Poor kiddo. I feel so bad for him. He has no adults in his life.

John...you failed to mention that IF the parents of this little girl split up, the dad will have joint custody of the little girl. The mom will have NO CONTROL over what happens at the dad's house. If the dad continues to let his son live with him, the little girl will be exposed to the son. The mom needs to consider that.

@DarcyCarmen

11 ай бұрын

That’s maybe a good point, but realistically all she has to do is tell the judge what’s going on with the son and she’d get full custody.

@marygassman-baltierra3530

11 ай бұрын

@@DarcyCarmen I've seen too many situations where the child is kept with the parent unless there is specific physical or sexual abuse to the child.

@nowandthennn

11 ай бұрын

@@DarcyCarmenI don’t know which state you live in , but in my area a child would not be kept from the Father because his son has problems. No way !

@DarcyCarmen

11 ай бұрын

@@nowandthennn Technically I’m Canadian, but the courts would be the same in both countries. All she would have to do is prove that the son has issues and the dad has sole custody. As John said, no one would subject a child to a drug addict, plus the nefarious characters the kid is associated with. The mother would show that the house has drug paraphernalia, dealers coming by and the father has no control. Game over.

The dad feels really guilty about the whole breakup from the kids mom and doesn't know wha to do besides say yes. However, in order to live the kid well you have to grow a backbone and stop everything. Get the kid into treatment and uproot his life right now. This kid will kill himself if you keep saying yes to whatever he wants and that's unacceptable.

@carolallison9685

11 ай бұрын

I'd buy that. He has a 14 month old with this woman and he still hasnt married her. Its pretty clear she got pregnant really quickly and he got stuck, and now he's feeling guilty for breaking up his family for a woman he had no intention of committing to. So now he is trying to be his kids friend in an attempt to make up for it but its only hurting the kid.

Hug him give him Love! Do not complain what he did, you might not understand what he went through this kind of household, Please! Be the kind woman transformed his life, he is just fifteen, sometimes we as a parent complain and blame about our kids that never showed or teach them the healthy path and boundaries then at the end we become tired of one another, May Almighty God give this child your wisdom to get up and see how you created the miracles of life!!! Amen🙏🙏🙏

@katemiller7874

11 ай бұрын

Yesss. She is a cold fish. Any mother. I mean a true mother would hold that big boy in their arms no matter how angry they are and give him love. A hug does wonders believe it or not

@addiskassa5165

11 ай бұрын

@@katemiller7874 well said! 👍🙏👊

@Gigi-zd8vi

11 ай бұрын

This is a very idealistic point if you. Everybody is willing to see what they would do until they are actually in the situation. It is very hard to support someone who is experiencing addiction. People need to learn therapeutic skills in order to develop the level of compassion needed to support someone in the recovery process. It could negatively impact your own health when in a caretakers role. That is a high learning curve and level of commitment. This situation is a real mess and I feel for everybody involved.

Dang this kid's got me beat, I wasn't overdosing in bathtubs until well into my 30s.

@mitshua

11 ай бұрын

Truly a prodigy

The enabling father has completely failed him but what does this call say about her? The boy needs a medical intervention like yesterday and she puts him out of her home like a pet that’s been bad? Dad- wake up, get your son the help he needs before you have to bury him. I beg you. And consider your future with this person who treats your flesh and blood like a burden

@ApostlePat

10 ай бұрын

🎯

Once this boy dies her future marriage will be over.

@lks6248

11 ай бұрын

Absolutely and the chances of him dying while still in his teens are quite high!

I dont think you can put out a 15 year old at least not in NC you cant this is a mess

The dad should be putting HIS foot down with his son, not this woman doing it.

It seems like while the dad was out having fun and playing house, he dropped the ball on making sure his was in good place. The step mom wanted the dad but not the too bad it's a package deal.

@rushiasingsfasola

11 ай бұрын

sex is a helluva drug

The way she talks about this teen is sickening. They clearly don't agree on parenting and this will probably end in divorce. The fact that both of the adults are allowing this to happen is so sad.

@katemiller7874

11 ай бұрын

Yes I feel bad for that boy.

@sandicook10

11 ай бұрын

They are not married

@Feliciations

11 ай бұрын

​@@sandicook10it doesn't matter. They have a kid together. Married or not, they are CONNECTED FOR LIFE. THE KIDS ARE SIBLINGS.

@cindygomez9707

11 ай бұрын

@@sandicook10 I'm just assuming they will get married. Even if they didn't, a breakup would be just as complicated as a divorce at this point.

Sounds like a cluster to me! But he is a minor and you can't just throw him out His father is responsible for him until he is 18. I think I'd move out to a safe place and when and if her fiancé and baby daddy gets it together about his 15 year old son and his responsibilities to him, I'd stay in my own place and not marry him. She doesn't have to stay and live in this circus.

You can't blame the man for not giving up on his son. Break up, and protect yourself, protect your daughter(get full custody)and protect your door. Move out.

They need to stick their hands in their pockets and get this boy the help he needs to get well!

A man who enables his kids in doing drugs is who she picks to start a family and have kids with. She needs to ask herself why. She either has really poor judgement, or an ulterior motive.

Fellas a ring will not make her a wife. Notice how she already separated herself from his other kid. No, you can’t want to be that man wife but not the his kids mom.

This literally sounds like 'The Father' with Hugh Jackman, for anyone who's seen it, minus the fact that this 15 year old's father isn't doing jack for him.

John- you should have told her when you marry someone you are a true mother to children that are not yours. She sounds like she treats the boy poorly if he thinks she dislikes him already. Absolutely protect your baby but you have room in your heart to love both children. The parents dropped the ball.

@sandicook10

11 ай бұрын

They are not married

@rayf6126

11 ай бұрын

She's also being told that she can't parent the boy at all. She doesn't approve of her fiancé buying him nicotine and saying yes to everything but she's not the parent....

It’s easier to blame the kid isn’t it. He failed his son.

The realities of these “blended families” is dismal. The kids suffer and pay a high price. We need to stop doing this to our kids.

@carolallison9685

11 ай бұрын

They can work, but the right circumstances need to be there. The father of my oldest 2 passed away in an accident when the kids were very little. I've been married to my current husband for 9 years now, and people wouldn't know they aren't his kids. He treats them like his sons, and they call him dad. Our situation works because there aren't a bunch of different households, and my husband was able to step in and fill that void. I think it can also work in a situation where one parent has abandoned the kids. Children need both a mother and father, and i wasn't going to raise my sons without a father and i don't think its ok to deny children that right, but you also need to choose your next spouse wisely. They have to understand that your kids will become their kids when they say i do, or else the two of you don't need to be married. And im not saying a single parent should be forcing their kids on anyone, but they have to find a partner who is willing to take on the role of parent. I didn't only choose a man for myself, i chose a man to complete the family and take on both the husband and father role, and it has worked very well. Again, you can't force anything on anyone and expect it to work, so you need to find someone who loves the whole family, not just you. The problem I've seen is that single parents get caught up in the whirlwind romance, and the kids are an afterthought.

@janisemills1

11 ай бұрын

​@@carolallison9685 It only works when the other biological parent is out of the picture. It doesn't work with the real dad and then the step dad in the picture or the real mom then a step mom. You cant except this to work when you have baby mamas and daddies around your marriage. 70 percent of marriages end for blended families and it makes sense. Marriage is hard enough so just think when you add on other kids and baby daddies/baby mamas. Also most woman do not play step mom when the real mom is in the picture. I find men to be more accepting about this for some reason. I think its because with woman its biologically confusing for them because we have to take on the nurturing role.

@janisemills1

11 ай бұрын

@@carolallison9685 You are a widow and widow are completely different. Completely different dynamic then most because your partner is not dealing with baby mama or baby daddy drama. You current partner doesn't have to deal with co parenting or conflicting schedules. Your partner doesn't have to deal with you having to live in certain areas because you are co parenting. Your partner doesn't have to deal with you being on child support. Your partner doesn't have to deal with different parenting styles because your ex parents one way at daddies' house.

HIS PARENTS FAILED HIM!

Why do ppl have relations and children with virtual strangers? This is what happens when you play house!

She keeps saying her house, I'm not hearing that she's working..so I bet fiance is paying the rent etc. I stayed single, raised my baby and 2 year old by myself after my divorce.

As a young drug addict and alcoholic, my mother kicked me out of the house when I was 16 years old. I didn’t have a dad to go live with. I ended up sleeping in parks and eating out of garbage cans. Best thing my mom could have done.

@mekeiawatson

11 ай бұрын

Did you get help

It’s not safe to keep the daughter under the same roof as this boy.

So you're just going to kick a 15 year old out on the street? Just telling him no isn't going to do anything, he needs qualified medical detoxification and treatment. Yes, I understand not wanting to expose younger children to this but this woman doesn't understand anything about addiction, nor does Dad apparently. They need to talk to better experts.

This woman needs to start shoeing this boy love. Kid didn’t get this way on his own. You can woman up and try to be a mother figure to this boy or hit the road lady

When she was dating this man that she didn't see that this was going on before? The "adult" cant even set boundaries with his 15 to the point he is giving him addative substance and her concern is only about the kid. Forget the kid I would be calling about the kid dad. It sounds like the kod is going thpugh hell and no one by hos sode cares expect maybe the girlfriend. This sounds like something that jas veen going on for a while and she only started caring because the son is living with them. I would have had to call CPS if the dad didn't stop buy drugs for him. That call just didn't sit right with me.

How dare you. You chose to have a child with someone with a 15 year old in the throes of drug addiction. Yes, protect your toddler, but do right by your partner and your toddler’s brother by loving and helping to rehabilitate this teen. Don’t just throw him on the street. He’s not 25 or 30. He’s a child.

As a step parent you cannot kick out your partners kid. Wow This means your relationship is in trouble if your partner is not on the same page with how things should be handled.

@Bunny11344

11 ай бұрын

They will never forgive them stepparent or parent however idk how u would deal with someone with addiction perhaps rehab tho I know they need to do it for themselves

I’m struck by her selfishness. I her choices and boundaries aren’t selfish but her attitude is. That 15 year old kid needs compassion. He isn’t going to hurt your daughter, he’s an addict not a murderer

@MissHolliday3110

11 ай бұрын

My brother was an addict and it does hurt the sibling. My childhood wasn't what it could've been because his addiction caused so much dysfunction. There's constant worry, tension, and seeing someone stoned and out of control is hurtful.

If hes gonna die it wont be under your roof huh? , so under whos roof should it be?? Hes YOUR child & he's only 15

If he is 15 there is involuntary drug rehab.. u will not need the 15 year old's consent . I don't know what the program is like or if it is effective. It is something to look into. He needs help before he dies.

She shouldn’t have dated/married a man with a kid.

Kicking a 15 year old out on the streets is not the right thing. He needs help

Thank God this lady finally got it. Boy was this getting hard to listen to cause she kept ignoring John's point. That she needs to leave to protect the baby, not the son. And that the issue is between her and the fiance.

So they been together 3 years..doing the math, she got preggo right away...had no idea who this man was...No One has asked the 15 yr old (11 or 12 when they started dating)...ARE YOU OK BUD?! What's going on in your life that u seek drugs as better choice than your current life?? Does the kid have a history of childhood abuse? I agree, u gotta keep your baby safe...however this caller is selfish! If it were her child she would not hold the same belief...she is an adult but has the mind of a child..

@KatieBellino

11 ай бұрын

I think the math is about a year into their relationship, not right away. Either way, she didn't pick up on some major warning signs that he's not a great father or stable person.

Sad.

1. She can’t just say “u can’t do blah blah blah in this house” to her fiancé Bc there’s laws protecting him and giving him rights to be there. She needs to understand that and make plans 2. Also, there’s so many things wrong here. The fact she would have a baby with a man that doesn’t have the same parental values is the problem. The fact they would bring a kid into this world when there’s one that’s a mess. I can already see them in custody court messing up another life. The doc can be nice but that’s reality. - people really need to start being responsible before using their feelings to bring humans into this world.

@pumpkin6464

11 ай бұрын

Annndd it’s probably the fiancés house🤦‍♀️

"We have a child together."

Girl get out of that relationship!

@firefly9838

11 ай бұрын

She's not capable of showing this CHILD compassion and getting them help

What a hard situation 😢my parents are the same way with a 20 year old brother of mine, he just smokes weeed, or that’s what he says, but friends come in and out , the girlfriend almost lives there , and he has no plans to work soon or move out .

At 15, a "history of addiction" is really bad news, although he and anyone could change and improve, you need some space and time. Protect your infant. That means you move out. Alone with your baby. sorry. He's already a danger to his step-sibling and that baby has already been exposed to disfunction.

@dolphinbear661

11 ай бұрын

@@wordsalad01 true, true, but seeing your big bro die in your bathtub should not be what happens to this baby.

@erikak128

11 ай бұрын

Something tells me that mom herself adds a lot of dysfunction too. Even if the couple go their separate ways it won't be the end of the problems.

An “ours” child. She is so spiritually hideous and your advice to her was totally heartless. The kid clearly still needs his father. Whatever broke up his family is killing him and his father is too busy playing house with this wicked stepmother who is determined to create permanent boundaries between her husband and his kids when his kids need them most. Adults if you are not ready to accept your spouse’s child as your own you are not ready to be married to them. She is disgusting and she will get what she deserves, all wicked stepmothers do.

Dr. John is right. She needs to sit back and look at the boyfriend and hold him accountable or leave

Sounds like she should have vetted the fiance before making a baby with him. If the dad is enabling his son she needs to seperate from him for the time being. Should have thought about this before making the daughter. The biggest problem would be the father enabling his son. The teen needs help. That would be my utmost priority as the father. I would know that my fiance could manage to care for our daugter who is healthy and safe then i am going to seperate households and put my addict child first bc this kid needs it most.

Why do so many have children BEFORE they get married then consider marriage and then think "uh ... oops"?

Blended and broken families spell trouble, and this is one form of that trouble: teenage delinquency, addiction, disconnected step parents, etc. Once upon a time, these broken homes weren't as common, and society took a wrong turn when they became more common. I know it's not cool to cast judgment on this social decay, but whatever... If I can't judge that, then y'all can't judge me.

Any one useing ours child should be reported to cps.

The help people need is not the help they really need .

This makes me so sad for the 15 year old. Right now all she sees is her "ours child". One day that baby will grow to be 15 and have their struggles....most all teens do. I know she has to keep the baby safe, i understand that. I'm just sad for the 15 yr old too.

He should have asked if the boys mother/extended family is around and able to take him in. Also if they have pursued rehab.

What the hell happened to this poor KID that he had a FENTANYL OVERDOSE at 15 years old?!?

Am i missing something? We are talking about a 15 year old with a "history of opioid addiction", did he get into fentanyl when he was 13? How did that happen? Why isnt anyone talking about it? I understand that he cant be around because its dangerous for the other kids but HE IS A CHILD ADDICTED TO FENTANYL. "Kicking him out" is called abandonment. Where is the talk of getting him into a detox factility or something?

You CANNOT by any means kick out a child who is addicted to fentanyl. What a disgusting call with disgusting advice. He needs to be in an in patient rehab facility ASAP. His father is failing him and his future mother is failing him

This lady has extreme harshness and lack of understanding. The 15 year old probably had a bad life, absent (ish) father, and emotional trauma so turned to drugs. Opiates are some of the worst because you don't just mentally have to get over lack of being high(very hard in an of itself), the withdrawals after a few hours are brutal, so it's even more reinforcing. She talks like the kid can just easily leave this behind and is "choosing" not to. As if it were like not eating ice cream for a month, if you haven't experienced addiction, particularly to opiates, then you likely have zero idea of what it's like or how hard it is to quit. She acts like she's the victim, nah it's probably the 15 yr old and maybe the "ours" child. Hot mess this lady got herself into

This woman’s boyfriend needs to get away from her. She has ZERO compassion for anything of his that she views as problematic. She is only concerned about herself and what she sees as hers. Marriage doesn’t work that way, especially if step-children are involved. First and foremost, you can’t give an addict an ultimatum like the one she did. Addiction can’t be shut off like turning off a lightbulb. To give that child an ultimatum of that nature is to set the child up for failure. If she were a decent human being, she and her boyfriend would work with his son to get him into rehab and into counseling. Opioid addiction is nearly always a way people try to deal with some sort of pain in their lives. It’s a form of self-medication. Having an abusive mother, a checked-out father, or a stepmother who would prefer you live on the street instead of help you could all be contributing to the pain this kid is trying to deal with. Dad needs to get his son help, and he needs distance from this narcissistic woman who believes the only people who matter are those she sees as "hers." God help their infant, because as soon as that infant becomes a burden, mom might toss her out on the street, too.

The blame goes on her and the father. Figure it out, he’s 15 years old. If you don’t address a fentanyl addiction now, when that kid is 18 you will lose him FOREVER… GROW UP

Everyone does not have capacity to deal with drug addicts. She has a right and responsibility to establish peace in her life. Her first priority should be herself and her daughter. She might need to postpone the marriage and consider moving out if her husband doesn’t get things under control.

Such a difficult spot to be in. 🙏🙏

This call is weird. How do you kick a 15 year old out of the house? He is a kid. Not like its a 18 year old adult. He needs help and counseling too

I am amazed how people are reacting to this call. This boy is an addict and his father is enabler. Nothing good comes from situation like this. Addicts are unrealiable and risky. I have grown up with one all my life. They place you in situation that are unsafe and scary. Most of the time addicts leave you in a wake of turmoil and self destruction. You left to clean up and be heartbroken. She is hundred percent correct imagine if her daughter one day finds her brother dead. As a parent your job is to safeguard your child. While, I understand he is only 15 and he needs help and I hope he gets it. However, she is setting a boundry to protect herself and her daughter. It is right thing to do. Which might seem selfish but belief me I applaud her that she has the option to make the decision. At the end of the day she has the right to choose who is in her home and who and her child interacts with.

I’d have my boyfriend and his son move out so that he can help his son. His son needs him.